me: Dude. LOOK AT THIS.
Victor: What the fuck.
me: I was opening my mail and two totally different people sent me random stuff that made them think of me.
Victor: You’ve got weird readers.
me: I’VE GOT AMAZING READERS. But how weird is it that two random people sent two random gifts and they just so happen to fit together perfectly?
Victor: That’s not really the weirdest thing about this, but okay.
me: I’m gonna try it out on the cats.
me: Not the handbook. The gloves.
Victor: Still confused.
me: They can wear them. Like tiny mad scientists with opposable thumbs!
Victor: Got it. Have fun bleeding to death.