I was going to write a post about the insanity of the last 24 hours but I’m a bit emotional (in a mostly good way) so instead I’m just going to point you to this moment on twitter so you can read it all as it unwound:
Sending love to you and to Queen Elizardbeth. Long may she reign.
Long live the queen!
Seanan to the rescue!
Some of the most interesting stories she has to tell are about her time in reptile rescue. (Hint – she wins “who has been bitten by the most venomous thing” contests with ease)
This made me so happy. Y’all are the best.
Oh my gosh. LOL
All hail the Queen!
And- if Curbside Crickets isn’t either the name of an alt rock band or a club of people who continuously say awkward things, that really needs to happen.
This is the kind of adorable, funny, and relatable content we all need at a time like this — complete with the no makeup and the pulled-back hair. We love you because of who you are, and that includes Jenny when she’s just trying to hermit but a lizard needs rescuing. (the video is beyond adorable)
This was everything I needed.
Just the kind of heartwarming story we need in these dark times! Thank you, Jenny, for all your posts and especially thank you for the clever critter names.
Your lizard looks just like the ones I used to have as pets. Except mine weren’t allowed to leave the aquarium. One lizard of mine decided to defy me by escaping the aquarium whenever she had the chance. I think Queen E. needs a warm, comfy place to stay. Will you be adopting her? She looks like she could be somebody’s pet.
That was fantastic! Thank you for the laugh, and giving me faith in humanity 🙂
(1) Apparently you missed the National Weather Service’s “falling iguana warning” in South Florida a few weeks ago.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2020/12/22/florida-weather-falling-iguana-alert-issued-due-cold-temps/4008730001/
(2) Victor’s warning was a good one.
https://youtu.be/1VyQipO4miw
Well done 👍🏻 🦎 💚
Thank you for that. I am just going into a federal oversight zoom meeting, and here I am reading about a lizard escapade. My mind is at peace. I am ready.
Your cat(s) are obviously more kind than my cats because a frozen lizard is viewed as a snack around here, except we don’t have lizards here but IF we had them my cats would eat half of it and then bring me the leftovers as a gift leaving it, in the dead of night, between my bed and the bathroom. That’s just how they roll. Lucky for Elizardbeth, you found it before one of my cats did. The local lizard community will probably worship you as a Goddess.
https://www.mrs-completely.com/funnywoman/we-need-a-permanent-paramedic-team-just-for-me-apparently/
Hi. You’re weird. I approve.
Yes, thank you, I loved everything about that.
Just. Love. You. So. Much!
I really appreciate that the people on Twitter are like “Yay! I can help” and full of advice and good wishes.
This makes me so happy. Thank you for taking care of Queen Elizardbeth
Just when I thought it wasn’t possible for me to adore you more than I already do ❤
You are the only reason I would ever consider signing up for Twitter or Instagram. Y’all are so special!
I laughed so hard. You are the best person!!
Thank you so much for this! This is everything I needed today for a pick me up.
Owls hunt at night, so Elizardbeth has a decent shot at survival.
Lizard savior- just add it to the list of why you are wonderful!
Jenny, I’m pretty sure I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again. I love you. I needed this today. And so did Queen Elizardbeth apparently. ♥️♥️♥️♥️
I loved this thanks for sharing. Reminded me of the lost rattlesnake sign
I read this live as it was happening and it was the best. What really cracked me up was as soon as you said Lizard Twitter, my first thought was you needed Seanan McGuire. Then a few tweets later, there she was. 🙂 You are an awesome temporary lizard mom. Long Live Queen Elizardbeth!
Loved that, YES we had need of this story. Love you!
You saved the Queen! Great job!!!
Am very sad I can’t access Twitter- am not banned, just locked in a loop of you already have an account and can’t get a password reset- any chance of screenshots for Twitter free people?
Well done! Now I guess you need to keep the Queen until there is a very warm day to put it back where you found it? I mean, can’t have the lizard queen freezing again!
Well done, Jenny! I’m sharing this with a friend who tried to rescue a dead looking lizard in Florida recently.. he’s gonna love this!
Love it! Fascinating color changes. This feels like my yearly monitoring of caterpillars who don’t appreciate my advice. https://possumscatsthingsgnawingatme.wordpress.com/2021/01/07/bird-nerd-big-game/
Ya know, you do good work kid! Keep it up. And maybe stock up in more Michonne swords, cuz why not?
That was amazing thank you. I’ve been feeling extremely down for a while and that made me cry happy tears. Thank you for being you
Grey Gardens but MORE raccoons?? Oh no 😂😂😂
A wonderful antidote to an “interesting” start to the year. Thank you Queen Elizardbeth for the welcome distraction.
Jenny Lawson…Lizard Savior. Did you ever know that you’re my hero? Heartwarming content indeed.
Goodness I love you Jenny. Your weird adventures always make me smile. While I was reading the Twitter posts my mom walked by and I said “Jenny had another weird adventure!” and her response was “well of course she did!”.
I’m so glad Queen Elizardbeth is all right. Thank you for rescuing her and for the laughter. I laughed until I cried.
Oh God, Jenny, I love you 💜. This was exactly what I needed today. Safe travels, Queen Elizardbeth!
I could tell you stories of the many garter snakes brought home and hidden around the house by my daughter when she was little. Just because they may have been hurt. I still remember her coming out of her room with a panicked expression and having to tell me that the snake that she smuggled into her room had gone missing! Thank goodness that none of us are scared of snakes!
You are an awesome person Jenny. I did cringe a bit when you were pulling his little toes off the frozen ground, but he seemed ok about it, I guess he couldn’t move to protest anyway. Queen Elizardbeth, amazing name.
I love how you said you had a miniature hoarding problem. According to Queen Elizardbeth it seems you have a miniature hoarding SOLUTION.
I am so glad you clarified that the bush darting wasn’t a euphemism. I shocked myself with the gusto of my LOL! You’re the best, Jenny!
Damn woman. And I thought my life was.interesting. Thank you for sharing your weird and wacky and oh so lovable life!!!!
Omfg I just spit food out!!! My mom always says, “ go get us some chocolate ice cream!” If you’ve seen grey gardens you Know!
This is the best story. you could make it into a children’s book.
Thank you for making smile.
Jenny, I love that the quarantime has given your weirdness an outlet, it gives the rest of us such wonderful entertainment!
Also, I totally would have shrieked if a lizard had climbed my head.
I love lizards! I’m so glad you allowed His/Her Majesty come to stay. Now your house needs one of those ”
Queen Elizardbeth slept here
Januay 2021
plaques.
Awww.
We have tiny geckoes (at least I think they’re geckoes. I’m not sure, actually) that took up residence in our garage almost as soon as we moved in 20 years ago and honestly, I’m OK with it. I’m the neighborhood nutjob who would refuses to use chemicals to make my grass grow and be green, because I don’t want to hurt the wildlife which has taken residence in my back yard.
Except hornets and fire ants. Those fuckers can go die in a fire.
Everything else–bunnies, birds, lizards and even a tree that snuck over from my neighbor’s back yard and started growing in mine (yes, this happened.) is free to live there and do whatever they wanna do. I have lizards that like to use my deck as a place to sun themselves and it’s kinda adorable to watch them do little push ups.
You, my dear, are a National Treasure. And a lizard whisperer. Two descriptors that rarely are bestowed on the same individual.
To paraphrase once of the best lines in both books and movies:
You keep using that word…”temporary”…I do not think it means what you think it means. 😉
This should be on the front pages of everything, not the *gestures at what actually is on the front pages of everything*.
You made both Queen Elizardbeth and me feel warmer.
Thank you for the distraction I so badly needed. You done good!
This whole crazy lizard drama, especially the part when it jumped into your hair, was nothing less than a full-on straight-up HERP DERP! And I love that you talk to critters the same way I do. 🙂
Your Pal,
Storm the Klingon
This was exactly what I needed this morning.
P.S. My parents (in Indiana) have feral lizards that live in their garage. Other than the lizard poop corners, they love having them in there. They have zero spiders or insects in the garage!
Love lizards. Love this content. Love this crowd.
And TOTALLY thrilled with the idea of collecting miniature versions of stuff I like, because unlike the normal type of hoarding, m̶y̶ ̶c̶a̶t̶s̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶p̶e̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶e̶v̶e̶r̶y̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶a̶t̶ ̶o̶n̶c̶e̶ I can hide it away with the toss of a blanket.
You absolutely missed your chance! You could have dressed her up! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=232NU8yQg30
Jenny, when I read of your adventures while sitting in my bed, and I start giggling and can’t stop. You’re the reason my husband looks at me like I’ve sprouted a second head. After I share your adventures with him, he sighs. (Pretty sure he sighs EXACTLY like Victor does.)
This community! Gems. Complete gems. Boil a rock and leave it near him, along with “good advice for just about anybody.” I love it. And you. Keep on keepin’ on, Ms. Jenny . . .
My dad was always helping me find little critters to make pets and built enclosures for them. I was a little Elly Mae Clampett!
I LOVE YOU!
You’re amazing.
I’m reading about a lizard being temporarily adopted???? A mob stormed our Capitol??? People are becoming tourists to Florida in order to get a vaccine??? How come everything sounds ….. normal? Have I gone nutso? Is it all a dream? Nope, just our New Normal, lizard included. Queen Elizabeth, my eye. That’s definitely Lizzo Lizard.
Ahh! We once had an open top Jeep in Kauai, and a lizard appeared *out of nowhere*. Not there one minute. Random lizard the next. We named her Liz Lemmard.
You, my dear, are a National Treasure. And a lizard whisperer. Two descriptors that rarely are bestowed on the same individual.