no one thinks this is funny but me – Page 22

Unimportant trivia: Padma was once married to the guy who wrote “The Satanic Verses” (which I always refer to as “The Vampire Diaries” because I’m bad with titles).

Part 1 and part 2 of my Blogher summary are done. Part 3 starts now: I was asked to do a cooking competition at Blogher and I would have said no except that they said that I could create whatever I wanted and that the judge would be Padma from Top Chef so of courseContinue reading “Unimportant trivia: Padma was once married to the guy who wrote “The Satanic Verses” (which I always refer to as “The Vampire Diaries” because I’m bad with titles).”

Stop being an asshole, New York

This is part 2 of my Blogher experience as recorded in my journal and I would recommend that you read part one first so that this part would make sense but honestly I don’t think that’s going to help either way. ********** Me: Take a right on Houston Street. Everyone else in New York: YouContinue reading “Stop being an asshole, New York”

Dear New York Airport: Maybe next time you could have us land in a pit of vipers that are also on fire. Just to keep things new.

Last week I was at the Blogher conference and it’s too complicated to write about so instead I’m just going to re-write the notes I jotted in my journal while I was there because I’m really tired and I believe in phoning it in. Also, if this is the first time you’re reading me youContinue reading “Dear New York Airport: Maybe next time you could have us land in a pit of vipers that are also on fire. Just to keep things new.”

Oh twitter. I don’t know whether I should feel touched or insulted.

Twitter has this new thing where they’ll suggest users you should probably follow based on your tweets. Here’s who they suggested to me: Honestly, Twitter. I get enough of that from my father. Comment of the day: Last time I followed Dr. Drew, he called the cops on me. If you can’t handle your legContinue reading “Oh twitter. I don’t know whether I should feel touched or insulted.”

This isn’t a real post

This isn’t a real post. It’s just a statement that won’t fit on twitter. My friend at Twitarded just pointed out that Judy Garland is stealing my look on her new lotto ticket and I think that’s probably not entirely true since Judy Garland died before I was born so it’s kind of impossible thatContinue reading “This isn’t a real post”

For the record, I’m half Austrian so I’m pretty sure I’m the enemy.

Conversation I just had with Victor that just proves what a terrible idea it is that we both work from home: Victor: Hey, could you find a way to turn up your music any louder when I’m on a conference call? Can we get you an amplifier? me: Dude. I can’t help it that IContinue reading “For the record, I’m half Austrian so I’m pretty sure *I’m* the enemy.”