Let a smile be your somewhat frightening umbrella

October 20, 2007

in Random crap

Lately when I tell Hailey to smile for the camera she gives me this:

h2a.jpg

 …which is less like a smile and more like she’s getting squeezed too hard by invisible bears.  And if I tell her  “No baby, just smile normally” she’ll just try even harder to smile psychotically until her neck viens are bulging and she’s shaking like she’s about to start a fire with her mind.

h4a.jpg

I’ve tried to wait until she gets tired and goes back to acting normal but she’s very persistent. 

h1a.jpg

 By the way,  the whole reason why I took this picture in the first place was to capture the unintentional 80’s bangs that appeared after I took out her topknot.  Unintentional…but awesome.

{ 2 trackbacks }

The Bloggess » Disturbing photos
October 30, 2007 at 7:23 am
Good Mom / Bad Mom
July 16, 2009 at 8:35 am

{ 63 comments… read them below or add one }

1 hello insomnia October 20, 2007 at 7:30 pm

You slay me, Jenny.

2 jen October 20, 2007 at 8:17 pm

is it really windy where you live? what? i’m just asking.

3 chelle October 20, 2007 at 8:23 pm

hehe Becca gives me that smile too! The bangs kick butt!

4 ktjrdn October 20, 2007 at 8:32 pm

I trick Aly. She gives me the cheese smile, and I tell her what a good one it was and then she smiles for real and I take the picture. What is the deal with the cheese smile?

5 -R- October 20, 2007 at 8:59 pm

My sister used to close her eyes and smile as big as possible – without showing her teeth. We have some pretty hilarious Christmas cards from the early 80s. No awesome bangs like Hailey’s though, unfortunately. We had bowl cuts.

6 Kyla October 20, 2007 at 8:59 pm

HI-larious. Those are amazing. Captioned perfection.

7 melissa October 20, 2007 at 8:59 pm

I don’t have any Aqua Net to give Hailey, but if I dug out my old green Caboodles I could maybe find an ancient bottle of Rave. Let me know what you need.

8 Julie Pippert October 20, 2007 at 9:34 pm

I’m not sure which is the best part: the huge smile, the hilarious series, or the hair.

Absolutely fabulous. :)

And much, much better than what I get, which are scowls and the hairy eyeball. My family, so cheerful and pleasant. Gotta love it.

Julie
Using My Words

9 Sayre October 20, 2007 at 10:48 pm

At least she still smiles. I think my son must be developing early because the teenaged glower has come to live on his face whenever the camera turns his way.

But every now and then, I get lucky…

10 marnie October 20, 2007 at 11:29 pm

Purple caboodles over here! Hollah!

It’s almost like a tribute to Flock of Seagulls. Totally radical.

11 Jenny the bloggess October 20, 2007 at 11:36 pm

Aw, I miss my pink caboodle.

Do they still make those?

12 flutter October 21, 2007 at 12:22 am

I think I just wet myself

13 Katy October 21, 2007 at 1:09 am

I used to get wide-open-show-you-my-food mouth for “smile big honey,” but in her last school pictures I got a totally posed-looking smile.

Makes me sad.

But the 80’s bangs make me smile – that is awesome.

14 Jeff October 21, 2007 at 1:40 am

“…squeezed too hard by invisible bears.”

How, oh how do you come up with this stuff?

15 Chase October 21, 2007 at 2:01 am

I cannot stop laughing at that second picture. Even Mr.Tango leaned over and said, “what is THAT!?”

SO funny!

16 melissa October 21, 2007 at 2:06 am

Yes. Not that I have any personal knowledge.

17 Sandy October 21, 2007 at 2:35 am

I’m not sure what’s with the smile but those bangs totally rock!

18 Willowtree October 21, 2007 at 5:05 am

You know, I don’t think these pics would look so strange if she was sitting on a toilet.

19 motherbumper October 21, 2007 at 5:42 am

OMG, she is completely rocking that sprayed bangs look I maintained that entire (scary fashion) decade. That style was a total fire hazard!

20 Biddy October 21, 2007 at 7:27 am

so i was sitting here looking at the 80’s bangs thinking “jenny, are you sure those aren’t pics of you!?” haha

21 Biddy October 21, 2007 at 7:29 am

p.s. jake does the whole constipated smile too..

22 Izzy October 21, 2007 at 9:07 am

I remember going through the forced-smile-of-fear phase with my daughter. I think we’re past that now and have moved on to the close-your-eyes-in-every-damn-picture phase.

23 daysgoby October 21, 2007 at 9:21 am

Toddler! Critical! Mass!

heeheehee.

Stop making me pee, Jenny.

24 Pamela October 21, 2007 at 12:51 pm

oh my… ‘jammin does it even worse than that.
I’ve gotten tricky and start asking him questions that require answers that make his mouth take on the smile shape.

“I like whipped cream” etc.

25 mamatulip October 21, 2007 at 6:31 pm

Those bangs and that smile are a winning combination.

26 Ed T. October 21, 2007 at 7:54 pm

So, Jenny, does she get her smile from you, or from Victor?

~EdT.

27 C October 22, 2007 at 6:09 am

I think these pictures should go on your holiday cards.

28 mothergoosemouse October 22, 2007 at 7:24 am

The black-and-white effect makes these pics even more fabulous.

29 Lotta October 22, 2007 at 8:21 am

I was scrolling down, reading that post and just waiting to give you hell about those bangs. But damn your self awareness you did it yourself!

30 Old Guys Dig Me October 22, 2007 at 10:03 am

holy crap that is funny! and also, the black and white and big hair…makes me think she needs to be wearing an apron and pearls. too cute.
and scary. all at once.
It’s too much to behold.

31 daysgoby October 22, 2007 at 5:42 pm

And I can’t see the third picture without ‘hearing’ the caption as if she’s gritting her teeth…

32 Tracey October 22, 2007 at 6:15 pm

Like, oh my god…I had those radical bangs also…hehehe! Remember when we used to tease our bangs a mile in the air?? Hello?? Or am I the only one who did that?? *sigh*

33 LaLa October 22, 2007 at 6:22 pm

Man, I wasted cans of hairspray trying to get a “speed bump” like that.

My nieces are right into pulling those faces too.. I kinda like it, it looks like all sorts of happy.

34 3carnations October 22, 2007 at 7:10 pm

The bangs were the first thing I noticed. I thought to myself “Wow, she really does a lot to her daughter’s hair. I just make sure my son’s hair is not sticking up – too much.” :)

35 Cindy October 22, 2007 at 7:40 pm

Yeah…we don’t tell AJ anymore to “show me happy”. It gets a little scary.

36 NotSoSage October 22, 2007 at 8:18 pm

The Claw!

We just saw the proofs of the “class photos” for our daughter’s pre-school, and she’s wearing a smile similar to your daughter’s. What is up with that?

37 Momish October 22, 2007 at 10:24 pm

At least she understands what is expected of her. When I tell my daughter to say “Cheese”, she answers with “yes please” and then takes off towards the frige.

Love the do.

38 LawyerMama October 22, 2007 at 11:32 pm

LOVE the Eighties hair! (Love the cheese too, but that goes without saying.)

39 kittenpie October 23, 2007 at 3:57 am

For a while mine gave me this crazed grimace, too, but I must say, Hailey’s got it down to a science. Popping neck chords and everything.

40 Phoenix October 23, 2007 at 5:03 am

I tell them not to smile, that whatever they do, don’t smile. I get the best laughing smile shots that way.

Also, tell her to say a word. Not cheese, but something else. Nothing is coming to mind in the moment, but you know what I mean. Something with that sound.

ps. Love the bangs.

41 Juliness October 23, 2007 at 6:11 pm

Her expression is that of a 56 year old librarian who just discovered someone has been eating in the library and she’s desperately trying to keep it together.

I love it.

42 BOSSY October 23, 2007 at 8:15 pm

That’s not just cheese, that’s cheese with a side of cheese.

43 Shades October 23, 2007 at 10:41 pm

LOL! Woo! Look at that big Texas hair!

44 kim October 23, 2007 at 11:34 pm

she’s so freaking cute no matter the intensity of cheese.

45 Marques Lyons October 23, 2007 at 11:48 pm

That’s cheesier than Cheetos! :) And is it even possible to see the hairstyle past that smile? :)

46 Robin (the pensieve one) October 24, 2007 at 2:52 am

OH.MY.EVER.LOVIN.WORD! Hailey is a mini film noir goddess. You? Your command of prose? I have an eternal crush on your brain.

And Melissa and Peter cracked me up. Heck, why stop with them? Your commentors are the funniest/sharpest in the biz.

47 Ed T. October 24, 2007 at 4:38 am

She just thinks she’s winning. When she turns 16 and brings her first date over, and you whip these pictures out and show them off, she’ll realize it’s not nice to fool with Mother’s Nature.

~EdT.

48 slouching mom October 24, 2007 at 9:06 am

There’s a fine line between pleasure and pain, y’know. And in those photos I think she’s edging up to the line. Heh.

49 lildb October 24, 2007 at 12:45 pm

serious. I was looking at the progression, and thinking – oh god, Jenny, I long to discuss the perfect eighties bangs with you, demonstrated by your modelish girl, but I wouldn’t want you to be offended by my bringing it up.

obviously, I still have some getting-to-know-you-better to do.

*slaps self in head for being a dolt*

50 alyndabear October 24, 2007 at 4:24 pm

Ha, at the LOLHaileys.

51 Tracey October 24, 2007 at 6:01 pm

Thanks for your comment Jenny…You are right Mr. Twinkle Toes is a Squidbilly! Go figure. Oh, and LOVE your daughter’s cheese! My used to do that but have since grown out of it. I plan on using the crazy pictures as blackmail when they start dating!

52 Simply Jenn October 24, 2007 at 8:57 pm

Hilarious!!! My kids went through a stage, but it was nothing like this. You have leverage for lifetime Jenny! Way to go!

53 laurie October 25, 2007 at 12:33 am

wow. those teeth!

i have several pictures of my 4-year-old nephew doing the same thing. cute and frightening, at the same time…

54 wolfbaby October 25, 2007 at 1:26 am

She’s to cute for words;) and the hair do to funny.

55 Tricia October 25, 2007 at 6:49 am

I have a whole series of cheesy Trevor smiles. It was a phase that passed. Good thing, too.

56 AC October 25, 2007 at 10:58 pm

Those are priceless!!!

I love her little cow lick:)

57 Tera October 26, 2007 at 1:02 pm

And yet, she’s still beautiful…but man (woman, I mean) those are perfect shots for Happy Halloween cards! hahaha

58 Carrie October 26, 2007 at 1:39 pm

Hilarious – and I was totally thinking, “did she DO that to her daughter’s hair?” until I read that you did not. You are, thereby, forgiven, for something you never did.

59 raincoaster October 27, 2007 at 2:58 pm

What’s with all the hate for the hair? She looks adorably vintage, like some love child conceived during the filming of The Breakfast Club or Heathers. What could be better than that?

60 Eilish October 29, 2007 at 7:14 am

Oh, thank you! I needed a good belly laugh!

61 Spamboy November 11, 2007 at 10:17 pm

I like the part where her veins jump out of her neck, the last visual clue I’ll have before my jugular is torn asunder. Stoopid Halloween.

62 Daniel Hagan June 26, 2009 at 10:45 am

Looks like she was just watching too much Wallace & Gromit to me…. ;-)

Daniel Hagan’s last blog post..Test…

63 Janelle July 16, 2009 at 7:50 pm

My brother was like that for the longest time. All the school pictures before 5th grade were just him showing his teeth :) He wasn’t even SMILING, it was just :[]

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