Trash the dress

Things I learned this weekend at a Trash the Dress photoshoot:

If you don’t own a strapless bra you can put bandaids on your boobs to give yourself a little more lift however it will actually cause your nipple to sort of implode, making it look like it’s eating itself.  The extra perkiness is nice but I’m not sure it’s worth the unsettling knowledge that deep inside my dress my boob looked like it was being sucked into a black hole.

Pictures (not of the nipples, you’re welcome) on Mama Drama.

Update:  Tater Tots for the Masses has illustrated a male version of the “lift scenario”.

17 replies. read them below or add one

  1. I probably should have saved the lesbian necrophiliac comment for over here. I don’t know if that was Mama Drama material. LOL.

  2. Funny thing, band aids do diddly squat when you have wonky, lopsided, d-size girls. I’d just be enjoying the ripping off of the band aid and my skin for nothing.

  3. The photos are awesome… you make a very hot corpse.

  4. I’m with Kristin. Bandaids, not so much help. Now, if you take an entire roll of duct tape…

  5. You should have your own supply of pasties (without tassels) for occasions just like this. I saw a website somewhere that had all kinds of patterns and textures….

  6. Gorgeous. You look like you just found a mermaid.

  7. I *love* the pictures. The first thing they bring to mind for me is The Tempest (Hailey is Miranda, and you are a female, non-manipulative, non-abusive-psychopathic Prospero).

  8. “You are a female, non-manipulative, non-abusive-psychopathic Prospero”.

    Oh Ali…if I had a nickel for everytime someone said that to me…

  9. If Bossy used band-aids on her boobs they’d have to be the extra small ones typically used for blisters.

  10. My only observation is that you didn’t look dead – it was more like “Woman in afterglow after make-out session with Giant Squid.”

    At least, that is how the headline in the tabloids is gonna read.

    🙂

    ~EdT.

  11. I like to put bandaids on my nipples, but not for lift. Just for fun.

  12. OK, I am confused by “Lift.” It makes me imagine a series of band aids strung together to the top of your head to keep yourself looking “Perky.”

    Can someone please educate me?

  13. unless it’s a bandaid made for a full grown elephant, it ain’t gonna give me any sort of “lift” cross your heart barely gives these things a lift!

    oh, and i’m still not completely sure you didn’t send parvo to my pups….i’m just sayin

  14. oh and i liked the pictures…

    i promise i’m not drunk…yet

  15. Yay for Trash The Dress shoots! I’m trashing my wedding dress the day of. There’s a fountain outside of our venue that I’m swimming in. I can’t freaking wait!!!!

    You look gorgeous in your shoot. Maybe you can get in the fountain with me at my wedding??

    🙂

  16. I can’t believe you would think that is not worth it. I’m not sure it’d help me, but I would happily turn my nipples inside out in exchange for more lift! 🙂

  17. Excuse me, but I must be bitter for a little bit about the fact that you come up higher in Trash the Dress results than my site does. *ahem* That just isn’t right. Bandaids or no bandaids.

    We still need to get together and do a family photo shoot. Lifestyle style. On a weekday or Sunday, as all of my future Saturdays involve weddings for the rest of the year.

    Christine’s last blog post..Sarah & Adrian – Houston, Texas Wedding

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