De-toeing the cat

cats1.jpg

So this week I was extremely distraught to find that  Melissa of “Waking Up” has deleted her blog forever.  (And yes, she’s the same Melissa of the Great Texas Beergarita Challenge.)  True to my word, I informed her that Posey would be minus a toe by the end of the week but that didn’t sway her because she hates cats and often posted pictures of dead ones on her blog.  (Prove me wrong, Melissa.)

As I was considering the most humane way to cut off my cat’s toe so I could mail it to her I found out that another one of my favorite bloggers, Pattie from Stolen Moments, who had suddenly quit blogging some time back has just as suddenly returned!  Then, days later, the illustrious Blog Chocolate also reappeared!  So in honor of this turn of events I’m giving Posey a pardon and letting him keep his toe.  Hell, I might even staple an extra one on him.  You’re welcome, animal rights activists.

**********

Remember a few posts back when I told you about my three year old taking pictures with her new camera?  Well I downloaded a bunch of them and I looked so awful in them I wanted to just shake her, screaming “IS THIS WHAT YOU THINK I LOOK LIKE?!”  But I didn’t.  Instead I took my banner photo and did a little fotoflexer work on it to see how I would look if I could save up some money for a slight facelift, a straighter nose and some other minor tweaking. 

thin.jpg

*sigh*

**********

Speaking of things that make me distraught…does anyone have the live recording of Ingrid Michaelson’s “The Way I Am” from the Carson Daly show?  Because youtube deleted it and I totally cried about it. 

 **********

Can you tell I’m off my medication? 

**********

And just when all seemed bleak and lost I got an email from the always entertaining Jeff Balke who was so inspired by my last post that he made me this:

tshirt.jpg

Thanks, Jeff.  I needed that.

**********

Updated:  Okay, you’re right.  Forget the facelift.  I look too much like Tim Burton’s Blythe Doll.  Instead I want Paris Hilton’s body but without all the VD.

paris.jpg

 

31 thoughts on “De-toeing the cat

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I totally need that shirt.

    And the no more Melissa thing just totally blows my mine. What am I going to do when I need my hobo cart fix?

  2. I tried to save Posey by offering up my husband. Tell the truth. Besides, I know you’re secretly happy since there’s another election coming up and you don’t want to face another Beergarita challenge, wherein the humiliation would have involved video of you rolling down the street in a hobo cart, screaming, “They’s just tits, y’all!” Min would have taped it and put it on youtube for me.

  3. Why Jenny – in facelift #1 – your lips are SO small…. aren’t you at least a teenie weenie bit concerned? he he he I’ll let you read between the lines on that one!

  4. Ooh creepy. That picture looks like somebody plucked the eyeballs out of your head and just left you with the sockets. That might be attractive to some people, but it doesn’t do a thing for me.

  5. Happy to save a cat toe. And like Pattie you have the power woman. Now you must get me one of those shirts … and stop creepin me out with Jenny-turned-paris picks. You are way hotter in yer own bootie girl.

  6. That shirt picture gave me a good laugh. The first fotoflexer picture reminded me of a wax doll’s facial features melting off the actual head. The Paris picture did look pretty nice. I just feel bad for the dog…

  7. Okay Jenny, you’re a smart industrious person and I’m one heck of a good stalker, I think we can find a way to induce Melissa back. I feel so sad without her and life without hobo carts? Well, is that really a life worth living? We can get her Jenny, we can!

    Now, we just have to meet in the middle of Texas and Oklahoma (which I think is probably Texas or Oklahoma) and go find her.

    Then we can save my cat’s toes too!

    Simply Jenn’s last blog post..My mom is home now

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: