Where the weapons of mass destruction went

Typical phone call from my husband:

Victor (sounding exactly like President Bush):  I’ve got some distressing news I must share with the country.

 Me:  Oh God.

Victor:  We’ve just recieved word that New York has been invaded.  Some sort of giant monster who we suspect is working with Al-Qaeda.

Me:  What?

Victor:  We’ve found some shaky handy-cam video in the area formerly known as Central Park.  It’s a terrible thing.  Monsters eating people.  Buildings exploding.  It’s a real shock because I was just there a few days ago and it was real nice.  Good people.

Me:  I don’t…I don’t even know what you want me to say here.

Victor:  It’s all a bit fuzzy right now but we think the Cloverfield monster may have eaten the weapons of mass destruction.  We believe he may be nucular.

Me:  Nuclear.

Victor:  We’ve sent FEMA out already and but it’s just awful.  I personally watched the footage and it was so unnerving I threw up on the back of Laura’s head. 

Me:  Yeah…I really need to go.

Victor:  I’d like to point out that this is what happens when you let Hilary be the Senator.

32 thoughts on “Where the weapons of mass destruction went

Read comments below or add one.

  1. See, this is exactly why Hillary must be stopped now. She must NOT be permitted into the White House.

    Perhaps the Cloverfield monster would do us all a favor and eat her.

    markira’s last blog post..Struggle

  2. Ummm, hahahahaha. Or not? What are my feelings supposed to be here? I think I’ll stick with haha.

    I don’t think I will watch that movie ever, though.

    Simply Jenn’s last blog post..The weekend

  3. cloverfield continues to haunt, eh? come to think of it, so does W. and really, i rate cloverfield as better only because i was half asleep and snuggling in the dark.

  4. Shoegirl Says:
    February 4th, 2008 at 5:01 am
    “With his sense of humor and your sense of humor, your daughter doesn’t stand a chance!She’s going to be a natural comedian.”

    That, or curled up , fetal posistion, in a corner, drooling and whistling showtunes. 🙂

    Hairy Weisenheimmer’s last blog post..Thunder Snow?

  5. Oh cute witty banter, awesome.

    [*note: recent divorced guy’s comments may contain sarcasm, bitterness and the overarching belief that all women are inherently evil. do not take divorced guy comments if you are nursing or soon may do something stupid like have a child into this world of pain and misery.]

    furiousball’s last blog post..my penis emailed me?

  6. I think Victor needs to get a blog where he can write about the weird things you call him about. Because I know there must be reciprocal crazy calls, right?

  7. Definitely not hot, although Victor would probably disagree since he’s *shudder* a Republican. He’s the strict, conservative boy and I’m the laid-back liberal girl. We’re like Darma and Greg but less funny.

  8. I’m sorry, I used to watch Darma and Greg and you and Victor are WAY more funny than they ever were.

  9. If this Victor guy starts boring you, you just let me know. On my home planet I’m considered quite attractive.

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