The Bloggess: not for eating

My friend Jessica at Snaptacular Photos turned me on to this thing.  It’s a random slogan generator.  You just put in your name and it gives you a cool new slogan.  Like this:



Let’s do another one.




Huh.  What’s with the bizarre cannibalism references, random slogan generator?






Okay, stop it.


Stop.  Just stop.



89 thoughts on “The Bloggess: not for eating

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I tried it. I got these:

    Pardon me, do you have any grey Greta?

    Greta, the other white meat.

    Everything looks better in Greta.

    Thanks Jenny, I’m scarred for life. Or…at least for another hour 😉

    Greta’s last blog post..Guinness in the Glutz Chicken

  2. What the hell is wrong with the model? She looks like she actually did try to eat somebody and it didn’t work out too well for her. Either that or she has the long, hard handle of a broom stuck up her ass.

    Law School Hot Mama’s last blog post..I’ve been Memed!

  3. There are those who would say, if a lovely blond wants to eat me, who am I to complain.

    I’m not one of those people, but I’m sure they exist.

    Candy’s last blog post..An Interview!

  4. I think that site is a part of the World Wide Conspiracy of the Giant Squid, whose leader, Great Cthulhu, is… hungry.


    Ed T.’s last blog post..Sunrise

  5. This is just too funny – I had to go check it out and across the top, it said “The Bloggess that eats like a meal.”

    What is it about the Bloggess that makes it think of all things oral?

    And I’m not sure what it thinks of me… Perhaps that I should be dressed in black leather and spikes?

    “The Sayre of Confidence”

    “Splash Sayre All Over”

    “I liked the Sayre so much I bought the company!”

    “Let’s Face the Music and Sayre”

    “Sayre – it does a body good!”

    Hmmmm… what do you think?

    Sayre’s last blog post..The REAL me

  6. I think that the random comment generator wants to eat my flesh, that’s what I think.

    Also I think that you guys are hysterical and that “Splash Sayre All Over” is an excellent tagline.

    PS. Marmite Breathe – I will have that butter song in my head for the rest of my life.

  7. Mine was “I want to be a Candy’s Corner Weiner”. Which I frankly love, but I can’t figure out how to put it on my blog, so ah well…at least it gave me 10 minutes of mindless fun.

    Candy’s last blog post..An Interview!

  8. You are my go-to girl for randomness on the Intarwebs. LOL.

    Maybe a Giant Squid is behind the slogan generator…and it wants to EAT YOU!

    Kyla’s last blog post..How?

  9. Now I’m scared, because it told me “If You Like A Lot Of The Journey On Your Biscuit, Join Our Club.”

    and also?

    “Do You Eat The The Journey Last?”


    Kyla’s last blog post..How?

  10. Oh! That’s fun! I’ve just spent WAY too much time on that…

    My favorite (ok, one of my 50 favorites):
    “Next to the Breast, My Circus Life’s the Best.”

    CircusKelli’s last blog post..I Know People

  11. Hmph. I don’t get it. Mine just said “Help me, Stjnky, I’m being held hostage in an Indonesian slogan-generating sweatshop.”

  12. I got some awesome ones:

    “Leggo my Lauraszoo”
    “I feel like Lauraszoo tonight”
    “what would you do for a Lauraszoo?”
    “Think Lauraszoo”
    “Thank Lauraszoo it’s Friday”
    “What’s in your Lauraszoo”

    Okay okay, I’ll stop now!
    PS. I got it, It’s BEAUTIFUL!! Thanks! I’ll send you an email tonight.

    Lauraszoo’s last blog post..I made a difference in someones day

  13. Your missing one that it should have generated…
    The Bloggess Finger Licking Good!

  14. OK OK – so I shoulda went to the site first then posted. But I think I just broke the cannibal run, and came up with your new slogan:

    It’s the Bloggess Fizz That Does the Bizz

    Yep that’s you!

  15. I got a bunch (see blog), including (not pictured on blog) “How do you eat YOUR markira?”

    Totally fun.

    If I were you, however, I would hide the condiments before you went to sleep tonight.

    markira’s last blog post..My New Slogans

  16. The commenters are always funnier than me. Except for that time I wrote about my great-aunt who was violently bludgeoned to death. I was totally funnier on that one.

  17. I can’t read your site right now. I have bronchitis and I just spent 15 minutes trying to gasp enough air into my lungs to type. STOP MAKING ME LAUGH, DAMMIT!

  18. Now see Jenny, the random slogan generator doesnt always want to eat you.
    “There’s first love, and there’s the bloggess love” Nice.
    “Cleans right around the bloggess” They also think you are a little dirty.
    (I kept your name in there because I don’t have a blog, I just love you… I mean yours…)

  19. OMG Tears in my eyes..
    Use “piece of shit” as your word
    Good thing I am the only one at work right now, otherwise people would be asking me why I am crying.

  20. I don’t know how I have missed you for all this time. But I have just spent the last hour reading your archives, and I am in blog heaven. You are truly the Bloggess.

    My husband hates you now. He’s home for the first time in a week and I’m still on the computer. Getting off now.

    Jenni’s last blog post..Scrolling Saturday: I Forget

  21. With statements like

    There’s More Than One Way To Eat The Bloggess!


    The Bloggess Finger Licking Good!

    I’m surprised the dirty minds here haven’t come to what should be a fairly obvious conclusion… Jenny’s found a new pr0n site!



    Ed T.’s last blog post..Saturday, in the Park

  22. Thanks for the post… I saw that site a long time ago and had completely forgotten about it. Have you tried the other stuff on there, like the battle monkeys and stuff? They’re hilarious. Oh, and I tagged you for a meme, if you want to play. 🙂

    seven’s last blog post..Frosting And Other Yummy Stuff.

  23. As I was reading this, I was thinking to myself: “I need to tell her to check out this slogan generator, because it doesn’t have all those scary food references”, but then I went to it, and the first slogan that popped up was “Melody. It’s what’s for dinner”.

    Motherf*cker indeed.

    Sunshine/Melody’s last blog post..Changes

  24. Well goddamn it. You get cannabalism but apparently, i’m just a tramp. I got:

    Life should taste as good as Gina.
    Gina keeps going and going.
    Naughty but Gina
    Gina Just feels Good
    Make it a Gina Night
    Unloose the Gina

    Gina (@amoxcalli on Twitter)’s last blog post..Arroz con pollo

  25. Thank you for introducing me to this slogan generator. Naturally, the first thing I did was type in the word “Penis.” I got “Top breeders recommend penis” and laughed for 15 minutes.

  26. Inspired by Lisa @ comment 59: – “Come fly the friendly ass’ = gold!
    Oh god I’m gonna be on this thing all day …

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