You know how on flickr you can give testimonials about how awesome people are? I always wish that people would leave me a testimonial but no one ever does so I decided to make some myself by pulling out a few comments that my friends have left on this blog.
What the critics are saying about The Bloggess:
Christine: It is scary. I think because you’re looking inside someone’s mental illness.
Lotta: It is sort of so awful it’s kind of cool. Like outsider art.
Furiousball: No flame throwers in today’s illustrations. Fail.
Kim: Fucked up in an interesting way.
LaLa: Blah. Vomit.
Nikki: That bitch drives me bonkers. Everyone has problems, only I don’t air mine or my vagina to the world thankyouverymuch.
Blue momma: Just one word – nasty. Well, technically I guess that was four words, but still, nasty.
Daysgoby: I CANNOT see her making a comeback after all that’s happened the last few months – her fanbase is older, busier and beginning to be appalled.
ThatGreenyFlower: Seriously, I think I’m going to throw myself off a building.
Smayzie: This is horrible. This is so sad.
ktjrdn: I’ll never be the same.
Defiant muse: That’s some very creepy shit. It makes me think about the goings on in some sleazy whorehouse.
-R- : I am scared. Hold me. Except please don’t because you probably have diseases now just from writing that.
Ali: Jesus Christ! Don’t stop here!
Hung Tung: I had a choice of ironing my face or reading this blog. We are all faced with tough decisions from time to time.
kittenpie: So wrong. SO wrong.
Phoenix: Freaks me out to look at it.
Erin: This is so not ok.
Jeff: It’s just so sad.
Houston: The banner makes me kind of uncomfortable
Willowtree: Are you sure you’re not really a guy?
3 carnations: Is the lady supposed to be you? You don’t look that tan in your pictures
Erica: I don’t get it.
Nikki: Where the hell do you find this shit?
Karmyn: I don’t get it.
Mindy : I came here ready to click on advertisers to generate a little revenue…all I found were headless rabbits.
Robin: It makes no sense at ALL!
Nicole P. – I just threw up in my mouth more than a little.
Swampwitch: I don’t get it.
Brandy: I had no idea it was possible to laugh and vomit at the same time until now.
Jeff: Wow, you’re a mess. Maybe Victor can pick you up a chew toy or some milk bones to make you feel better.
Marmite Breath: I like fat chicks, so we’re still all good.
dodo – Sorry about your ass.
Lawyermama: Not bad for someone with no remaining original thoughts.
Oh yes. Now I feel much better.
56 thoughts on “Actual comments I’ve gotten”
Read comments below or add one.
This is a hilarious idea. Love it. Looks like a lot of work though. Maybe when I finally hire that Transcriptionist I’ve been wanting.
Love your blog! (There! Testimonial!)(slash ass-kissing, oops)(still: true)
Tessie’s last blog post..Valentines Day: The Aftermath
This and the cocktail party post are possibly the funniest things I’ve ever read. I love it! I worship your warped genius.
Not the Mama’s last blog post..Violators Will Be Publicly Scorned
I love these things, Jenny. I am sure I have written the occasional nice comment about you too. Maybe.
Ok, how about: Jenny, you’re the best, and I always love reading your blog! You are smart, pretty, and a great writer.
-R-‘s last blog post..Purse of Hatred
now with paralyzed cats! this new craze is sweeping the nation.
Apparently I don’t talk at testimonial time OR at imaginary blog cocktail parties.
I do, however, feel very loved and special because you would only shoot me in the leg.
I must apparently learn to be more insulting and abusive in the comments section. Or funnier. Or something.
markira’s last blog post..My Project For the Day
That was awesome!
Here’s your testimonial: Jenny is a delight to read. Her humor works its way into even the most difficult of situations.
3carnations’s last blog post..Is she prone to losing numbers?
Best Flickr stream EVAH!
Sonia’s last blog post..Career? Me?
Well . . . at least people actually post on your blog . . . according to my analytics, a gazillion people READ my blog, but only like 3 of them actually comment on it. Maybe I’m so fubar that they are scared to respond?
Law School Hot Mama’s last blog post..Clearing Up a Few Issues and Kitty STDs
I’m sorry no one loves you enough to testamonialize you on Flickr, but I think they’re probably doing you a favor based on these comments.
I don’t get it.
Simply Jenn’s last blog post..Well, the header is staying up another day
Remember that post I did on A-List Bloggers? Your mom’s not the only one who thinks you’re one!
Sayre’s last blog post..Fun Monday Assignment for February 18th
(afraid to leave comment and be quoted out of context)
(never mind NO FEAR)
I’ll just quote other weird people about weird things:
“We could learn a lot from crayons; some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, while others bright, some have weird names, but they all have learned to live together in the same box.”
“Know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything’s different.”
“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”
Julie Pippert’s last blog post..All-true Confessions of a Suburban Rickshaw Soccer Mom
“Sorry about your ass.”
I may just start leaving that randomly in comments.
CircusKelli’s last blog post..Happy Thursday
I got your testimonial right here, pal.
Spamboy’s last blog post..Updates for January 19, 2008
Look… I’m sure whenever I said that I meant in a a good way… Probably. Maybe.
Okay, you frighten me sometimes. But only in that good way that makes me feel tingly.
ali’s last blog post..Friday: Good thing it’s here, or I might have jumped off a bridge.
Reading you after spending two days in the hospital learning how to deal with a squished eye and eye ooze makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
Thanks for this.
Redneck Mommy’s last blog post..I’ve Got My Eye on You
OMG. This was genius and I’m cracking up.
Oh Jenny, you are all that and more. LOL.
Kyla’s last blog post..And so it continues…
Now that’s not something I’ve seen before – gotta love the original.
Maddy’s last blog post..Complementary abilities and word retrieval
I can’t decide which is my favorite – the “outsider art” or the “sorry about your ass” one.
Toni’s last blog post..Where Does This Stop?
Haha, that’s very funny! The sorry about your ass has to be the best one of the lot!
Jenty’s last blog post..Valentines schmallentines
I think that is cause to go and imbibe some serious tequila. You and Jose Cuervo can discuss the size of your butts (can’t cuss due to Lent!)
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..Hai-kachoo! Oh, Paul-en?!
Reading your blog is like doing something you know is wrong and getting away with it and then your brother tries to do it and gets busted, then he tries to sell you out to your folks, but they don’t believe him because you’re the good kid and he is in his rebellious phase.
Reading your blog is like having a dream where you are “making water” for a really long time and there is water all around you and you are certain that you are wetting the bed but you still can’t wake up and when you do your sheets are drybut your house has been robbed. You freak out only to find your belongings out in the front yard with a note saying “Compliments of The Bandits of Inconvenience…”
Your blog is something like that.
And I’m right, too.
God, I would kill for the amusing comments you get. I’d laugh myself to sleep every night. Apparently, I’m not fucked up enough, though.
kittenpie’s last blog post..This post brought to you by the letter B
How come Hung-Tung isn’t one of my readers? Will you please leave a comment on my blog that indicates you had to choose between reading my posts and ironing your face? That would make it all worthwhile.
NewDuck’s last blog post..Mini Spring Rolls With Dipping Sauce
This is great! Makes me want to look back through my comments and do a post like this… like that’ll actually happen.
JMC’s last blog post..The “don’t try this at home” fable series, part II: in which I have an unfortunate run-in with a mailbox
I only want to throw myself off a building because I can’t be as hysterically funny as you, ya curlers-wearin’ bad-ass.
I love that you keep doing this. It makes me want to be more inventive with my comments. Not today obviously, but next time. 😉
Phoenix’s last blog post..Happy Valentine’s Day, my friends
I can neither confirm nor deny I said any of those things.
Jeff’s last blog post..Done!
You are hysterical.
Sauntering Soul’s last blog post..Make it stop! My eyes are burning!
:snif: Jenny didn’t include any of my comments. On the other hand, she did promise to shoot me in the leg.
Of course, she didn’t say which leg…
Ed T.’s last blog post..Buh-bye, Chuckie
Absolutely Bananas’s last blog post..Bon Bon is my middle name
I am sure I have said that more than once…. and it is mostly the comments. You have the best commenters!!!
I think it is because you are so awesome. I am glad I can call you friend.
Erica’s last blog post..I’m the mom….. be afraid!
You’ve done this twice now and my comments have not made the cut for either one. I guess I am not original or sassy enough!
Tracey’s last blog post..Man-ass-as
this post was jizz all over myself enjoyable… oh shit i shouldn’t have typed that. just remember to hit the back button and not Submit Comment. whew good thinking. i wonder if enter submits this form…
furiousball’s last blog post..Things to not do while under the influence of codeine
AMomTwoBoys’s last blog post..A Dylan Update
I love these, it’s so awesome to have readers who are marginally less funny than you are 😉
Kidding! Your blog is a badass party
flutter’s last blog post..The post where I don’t mention Valentine’s day. Oh, crap.
You make me laugh like no one else can.
AHEM! I did give you a testimonial on Flickr. You just haven’t approved it yet.
I never said that. I don’t even read your blog.
sweet! these would also look fantastic on the Canniballistic Bloggess tshirts…
Dawn’s last blog post..Haiku roadtrip
I’m so going to copy you. Who has no original thoughts now?
LawyerMama’s last blog post..Is Health Care a Right or a Privilege?
You are great.
And I need someone to explain “There Will Be Blood” to me. Because it was bizarre. And I’m confused.
after reading comments to news articles and blogs, then dropping a frying pan on my foot to remind me to never do that again, i have come to the conclusion that the more the general public is offended, the bigger the glory.
roll around in that, jenny. iron it into your face. revel in mental illness. worship your beautiful butt, air your vagina, celebrate your ability to make your readers vomit. badge of honor, baby.
Ed T, she promised to shoot *me* in the leg.
Hey, wait, maybe she just says that to everyone! Maybe it’s meaningless! Maybe she doesn’t even really care about us at all! Maybe she just throws out random placating comments to us to keep us from hunting her down and massing outside her home chanting her name!
markira’s last blog post..Sometimes It’s So Hard To Play It Cool
Shit. They’re on to me.
Actually, I love each and every one of you dearly and I wanted to send everyone valentines day cards but apparently I crashed the entire internet that day with my love.
It’s pretty impressive.
My love. Not the internet.
hmmmm interesting idea. Mine would be full of vomit, ‘what the hell’s’ and douchebags.
Pity Hung Tung doesn’t have a blog cause this:
‘Hung Tung: I had a choice of ironing my face or reading this blog. We are all faced with tough decisions from time to time.’
would become my tag line.
Kelley’s last blog post..I have lead a sheltered life.
hmmm. i’m going to have to go to commenters school so i can up my game here.
can i be sorry about MY ass?
janet’s last blog post..Catching up: Roo’isms and a meme for me me me me!
Oh, Bloggess. Out of the thousands upon thousands of comments you receive there must be as many positive as negative.
(Probably not as entertaining though. I just thought I’d give you a little affirmation. Want to make sure your self-esteem is still . . . um . . . steamy.)
Red Flashlight’s last blog post..Nifty Ad Slogan Generator
YOU are SO hilarious!
Shoegirl’s last blog post..The Dom Perignon Mystery & Other Champagne Adventures
Love you, and be glad of it, otherwise we could be brutally honest.
Houston’s last blog post..Cali
With those testimonials, you’ve got me hooked.
alyndabear’s last blog post..Visiting the Queen & Other Adventures.
I seriously love this. Of course, very few people comment on my blog, but i’m ok with that.
I agree, while holding the ability to disagree firmly in had,with at least some percentage of the comments if said percentage is smaller than 1 but greater than -1 million.
Your blog is funny. And you may quote me on that.
Michael’s last blog post..TT # 8 or 9, I don’t know
Just so you know, the evil twin in me is SOOOoooo wanting to say something like, “You stupid, mother-fu#king b!tch, why anyone reads your drivel-filled blog is beyond me!” except I don’t talk like that and heaven forbid if something like THAT was quoted and attached to my name.
So let’s just pretend I never even thought it, k?
Robin’s last blog post..Putting the FUN in Fun Monday
Fuck all those inarticulate fucking motherfucker fucks for naysaying against my Bloggess, my liege.
Dr. Ding’s last blog post..Dr. Ding Goes To FiFi Mahony’s….
Genius and disturbing at the same time.
HRH’s last blog post..Monday morning potluck…act natural!
This is really a creative and intriguing idea. I bow to your BloggessISHNESS. And your header rocks!
JCK’s last blog post..What a night! Oscar Night 2008. And did you see Tootsie & Mrs. G?
Some people can be cruel. I love your blog, and almost every post makes me cry with laughter. I love the picture at the top. Thank you for putting some clean– um, good– well, funny-as-shit humor out there.