I’m being oppressed.

in conversations, no one thinks this is funny but me, Random Crap

Victor:  What the fuck are you are you doing?  Aren’t you supposed to be working?

me:  I’m learning about neuroscience.

Victor:  You’re looking at pictures of kittens.

me:  I’M DOING BOTH, ASSHOLE.

Victor:  I’m going to block the internet on your computer when you go to sleep tonight.

Conclusion: Victor is intimidated by my knowledge of science. I’m like Yentl when she had to become a cross-dresser to learn the Torah, except that I have to go hide in the bathroom and pretend to have food poisoning so that I can look at pictures of cats on my iphone without getting hassled.  This is exactly why it sucks to be a girl.

92 thoughts on “I’m being oppressed.”

Read comments below or add one.

  7. Slip him some catnip and force him to watch “Catpeople” with Isabella Rossetta stone.. or whatever the hell her name is. He’ll convert.

  15. Kittens: good for teaching science, good for warming hands, good for filling the black void in my soul, bad for eating. Too stringy.

  20. Dear Melanie,

    I think you are being sarcastic, but I’m not sure and if you are being sarcastic, what do you mean? Are you calling Victor a sexist? I don’t think he is. He’s just not into the internet or kittens. Victor hates kittens. But what does that have to do with science and girls?

    Hearts,
    Windsor
    .-= Windsor´s last blog ..Atlanta is freaking out about a “wintery mix” again. We all know that means you don’t know what’s going to happen. =-.

  26. The next item after this in my feed reader was, “Psychologist found guilty of exposing himself”. Now, you can tell me all you like that studying neuroscience does not make you a psychologist… but it’s only a small step, Jenny. Save yourself the exposure. Keep studying the kittens.

  28. Perhaps Victor is jealous that you are officially listed on our site as a “Cat Person”. Has heeee ever let the cat sit on his head or tried to use the cat as a Bumpit? *Warning* Warning* Danger Will Robinson!*Are you sure he doesn’t secretly work for the anti-catinites at the Shorty Awards?
    .-= LookieLou´s last blog ..Super Cute! Antler Ridge Wildlife Sanctuary! =-.

  29. Apparently when I told him that I needed him to help me stick to my deadlines that meant that he got to decide if looking at cat pictures was conducive to me actually working. Clearly he’s no good at this sort of thing.

  30. Now I’m all warm, fuzzy, AND educated. I wish they could do that with statistics. I wish I could share that with the visually impaired. Wait! I’m going to make a monotone recording of me reading the text version and post it on a kitty porn site for the blind. The Red Cross ain’t got nothing on me.
    .-= Elly Lou´s last blog ..Pterodactlys, Apologies, and Weddings =-.

  32. I don’t see the problem. It’s not like you were jerking off to clown porn or anything. Maybe you should remind him that it could always, ALWAYS be worse. Or tell him that the next time he threatens to take away your internet you’re going to make him sit down and watch the ENTIRE clown porn dvd.
    .-= Uriah´s last blog ..It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want too, dammit! =-.

  42. This is what psychologists call “contempt prior to investigation.” A man has to be secure enough in his masculinity to be open to learn, even if it features freakishly miniaturized kittens. Besides, the last picture has a dog in it. I want to live in a world where no one has to pretend to Barbra Streisand doing anything. Unless they are female impersonators and really want to.
    .-= Mr. Paul Maul´s last blog ..POPULAR EVENTS AT THE SELF-IMPROVEMENT OLYMPICS =-.

  44. Reason number 19 I shouldn’t be allowed on the interwebs while hungover. I didn’t realize there was a hyperlink to another website. I thought you were all talking about the creepy cat person on Chat Roulette. FAIL!

    BIGGER FAIL: When Jenny tweeted about “chatroulette” I thought she was sharing a recipe for Mardi Gras parties. I read it as “chat-RUE-LAY.” I certainly wasn’t prepared for creepy cat people.
    .-= Bad Guy Zero´s last blog ..This Strip Mall Has It All =-.

  46. You should listen to Victor. He got us James Garfield, for fucksake. But I am pretty sure buenobaby is a terrorist. (as evidenced by the salt on watermelon comment). If you don’ put salt on your watermelon, the terrorist have won.

  47. You slay me, girl. I can’t think of a better way to begin my day than with your blog. My diabetic cat had an insulin shock yesterday…good think he’s ok or you would be getting a stuffed kitty to stand with James Garfield. ; )

  50. If it was that site with the cute cats and bad spelling, well, that’s just fiiiiiiiiine. I mean, there’s a reason I get about 427 forwarded emails a day full of their picture compilations. You’re simply multitasking. And if he blocks you, call a tech friend. They will help you. Since we each have a tech friend, it’s a draw at our house.
    .-= Sam´s last blog ..Song of the Camel =-.

  56. ok. now i feel like i have microscopic kittens surging thru my body, helping me to taste corn and stuff. and i am allergic to cats, so now i have to go lie down until this sickness goes away. which will be NEVER since the fuckers live inside me, only i was never aware of them until now. THANKS, Jenny.

    and show Victor this blog and tell him you got a day’s work outta lookin’ at the kitty science. YOU WIN.

  59. Holy crap. I would have been in AP bio if I’d had that as a study guide. Or AP physics. Or whatever. Point is, I would not have set anything on fire with the gas valves in remedial chemistry. I might have done great things.

  68. I’m being oppressed too! But not by Kittens or Victor… by FUCKING CORPORATE AMERICA!!!! What the hell is with you fucking HR people… part of my job is to monitor Social Medial – YES, I’m on facebook all fucking day you fucking idots… it’s the pulse of social media. My head aches… but, I’ve found the cure… Zoloft & Vodka. It’s the cocktail of champions!!

  73. I had to do a health project on neurotransmitters and the chemical synapse. My partner and I made a block of wood with shapes cut out to show our classmates how neurons could only go through a certain synapse if they fit. Yeah. It made no sense. We should have just brought in kittens and used them to explain it. It would have been more exciting. And cuter.

  74. 11 Bejewell
    19 if you wanted to do science, you shouldn’t have been born a girl. Lesson learned.

    I have no idea why cut and paste put up those two posts. But hey I am all for bejewling the fuck out of any emo chick..including me.

  77. glad to know i’m not the only one who hides in the bathroom to read, or eat dove dark chocolate. eating chocolate in the bathroom is not gross. what’s gross is spitting out a half chewed soggy square because your 4-yr old is demanding some.

  78. What Victor doesn’t realize is that if my biology textbooks had looked more like that, I would have totally become a doctor… or a vet, at least.

  81. How can anyone not like a picture of a kitten laying on a laptop? Is he a monster? That’s classic cute right there!

  86. Dear Bloggess,
    I just tied my cat to a kite and tried to fly him in a lightening storm in order to learn more about electricity.
    Instead, he’s peed in my bed and threw up in my shoes.
    Thanks for nothing!
    Science sucks!
    .-= HannahBanana´s last blog ..My cats are gay! =-.

  87. I learn more about neuroscience on your blog than I ever did in science class. You can tell Victor to just stop bloody well oppressing you because You are doing a public sevice here, hmmmph men.

  90. Tell him you’re learning about the effects on enjoyment of kitten videos by the use of Xanax. It’s neurologically related…. ish…

  92. Hmpf. I have that same conversation with my own Victor when I’m reading your old blog posts.
    I see it as educational, entertaining and showing loyalty.
    He thinks it’s an illness.

    “Are you STILL reading that blog?”
    “Get off the bloody computer!”
    “Are you even listening to me?”
    “This milk tastes funny”
    “Did you poison the milk?”
    “…help me …”
    blah blah blah

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