Victor: What the fuck are you are you doing? Aren’t you supposed to be working?
me: I’m learning about neuroscience.
Victor: You’re looking at pictures of kittens.
me: I’M DOING BOTH, ASSHOLE.
Victor: I’m going to block the internet on your computer when you go to sleep tonight.
Conclusion: Victor is intimidated by my knowledge of science. I’m like Yentl when she had to become a cross-dresser to learn the Torah, except that I have to go hide in the bathroom and pretend to have food poisoning so that I can look at pictures of cats on my iphone without getting hassled. This is exactly why it sucks to be a girl.
Maybe you should start wearing a cat suit – MEOOOOWW!
.-= Toy With Me´s last blog ..CBS Abortion Ad A Classic Bait And Switch =-.
As a boy, I can tell you that it frightens us men-folk when you girls get all smart and science-y. And crazy. And hormonal. And obsessed with cats.
.-= Daddy Scratches´s last blog ..Y? Because I’m a basket case! =-.
That site was strangely unsettling, yet I couldn’t look away. It was like looking at an accident, or when someone puts salt on their watermelon. Disturbing.
.-= BuenoBaby´s last blog ..mornin’ sunshine! =-.
well then i’ll continue to send you cat pictures through email and tell Victor you have to check your email because you are waiting for a work email. We will beat the oppression.
.-= Luna´s last blog .."in a world that makes no sense, the only thing i hear is the beating of our hearts slowing down." =-.
Just another reason that being a girl sucks. Damn you vagina!
.-= singlemomma_cc´s last blog ..I hope she calls me momma till the day I die =-.
I’ve always known that I had it better than you dumb girls.
.-= Jim McCray´s last blog ..A Valentine’s Day Joke About My Ex-Girlfriend =-.
Slip him some catnip and force him to watch “Catpeople” with Isabella Rossetta stone.. or whatever the hell her name is. He’ll convert.
i totally get neuroscience now. awesome. all this study needs is C.C.
.-= Patty Punker´s last blog ..v-things and shit i hate in the social media world =-.
You’re like Tootsie! Can’t even act the way you want to act… pfffff.
.-= Severine´s last blog ..BPA-free electric water kettle =-.
That is quite possibly the best explanation of neuroscience ever! It could have saved me 2 years of grad school in psychology. Damn you, kittens. Where were you in 2008?
.-= Dani´s last blog ..For the record, my answer was "gimme three steps"… =-.
He’ll change his tune when he needs emergency brain surgery and you just happen to be there, armed with a rusty knife and your knowledge of kittens. THEN he’ll be all “God I’m glad we’re married and I didn’t block your internet.”
.-= Bejewell´s last blog ..Jesus Wants Steve Jobs Dead Just As Much As You Do, Sprint. Let’s All Work Together. (Updated) =-.
Life is hard. But, surely you know what to do, right? When life hands you lemons like this… throw them in Victor’s face!
.-= Belle´s last blog ..I Even Bought Her a Book Called "The Worry Cure." I Don’t Think it Worked. =-.
You should start a revolution.
.-= Aunt Becky´s last blog ..Warm, Like The Evening Sun =-.
Lucky u , he’s nt interested in cats !
Kittens: good for teaching science, good for warming hands, good for filling the black void in my soul, bad for eating. Too stringy.
Do you read skepchicks, Jenny? the neuroscience cats were linked to from there today also.. and
so was this (nsfw):
http://dvice.com/archives/2010/02/nsfw-g-point-mo.php
Dude, best website ever. Except that last picture with the dog. Fuck dogs.
.-= Chickadee´s last blog ..Letting the (Potential for a Future) Cat Out of the Bag =-.
I was TOTALLY just looking up neuroscience when I clicked over here to cure my boredom/frustration… Go figure.
.-= Rob´s last blog ..An Explanation… =-.
If you wanted to do science, you shouldn’t have been born a girl. Lesson learned.
Dear Melanie,
I think you are being sarcastic, but I’m not sure and if you are being sarcastic, what do you mean? Are you calling Victor a sexist? I don’t think he is. He’s just not into the internet or kittens. Victor hates kittens. But what does that have to do with science and girls?
Hearts,
Windsor
.-= Windsor´s last blog ..Atlanta is freaking out about a “wintery mix” again. We all know that means you don’t know what’s going to happen. =-.
Victor wouldn’t have cared if you were looking at pictures of swine since he’s obviously a male chauvinist pig.
.-= Theresa Milstein´s last blog ..Denial =-.
Kittens and neuroscience! Why didn’t I know about this before?
.-= Becky Mochaface´s last blog ..Snow Day =-.
I’m sicked by Victor’s anti-semitism. And I loved you in “The Main Event”.
.-= Marinka´s last blog ..L’Chaim! =-.
I have to ask the obvious, what business is it of his WHAT you’re doing? teheeeee
.-= Dual Mom´s last blog ..I Would If I Could But I Can’t, So I Won’t =-.
Things I never thought I’d hear in the year 2010
“I’m like Yentl”
Wow. Excellent reference. Mashuggina.
.-= Chris Illuminati´s last blog ..Finally! A Facebook group I’d be happy to join =-.
The next item after this in my feed reader was, “Psychologist found guilty of exposing himself”. Now, you can tell me all you like that studying neuroscience does not make you a psychologist… but it’s only a small step, Jenny. Save yourself the exposure. Keep studying the kittens.
I learned a lot from the neuroscience cats. I don’t know what Victor’s problem is.
.-= tmc´s last blog ..Hot Hoosier? Who, me? =-.
Perhaps Victor is jealous that you are officially listed on our site as a “Cat Person”. Has heeee ever let the cat sit on his head or tried to use the cat as a Bumpit? *Warning* Warning* Danger Will Robinson!*Are you sure he doesn’t secretly work for the anti-catinites at the Shorty Awards?
.-= LookieLou´s last blog ..Super Cute! Antler Ridge Wildlife Sanctuary! =-.
Apparently when I told him that I needed him to help me stick to my deadlines that meant that he got to decide if looking at cat pictures was conducive to me actually working. Clearly he’s no good at this sort of thing.
Now I’m all warm, fuzzy, AND educated. I wish they could do that with statistics. I wish I could share that with the visually impaired. Wait! I’m going to make a monotone recording of me reading the text version and post it on a kitty porn site for the blind. The Red Cross ain’t got nothing on me.
.-= Elly Lou´s last blog ..Pterodactlys, Apologies, and Weddings =-.
The whole blocking your internet thing when you go to sleep was a very dick lord approach.
.-= Pamela @ 2 Much Testosterone´s last blog ..I’m Featured on Aiming Low’s Three Day Weekend! =-.
I don’t see the problem. It’s not like you were jerking off to clown porn or anything. Maybe you should remind him that it could always, ALWAYS be worse. Or tell him that the next time he threatens to take away your internet you’re going to make him sit down and watch the ENTIRE clown porn dvd.
.-= Uriah´s last blog ..It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want too, dammit! =-.
I once fired a man for looking at pussy on the computer when he was supposed to be working.
.-= Kristin´s last blog ..Loose ends (mine) and loose lips (hers) =-.
Totally envisioning him as the science-nazi—“No cats for you!”
.-= Paula´s last blog ..Trees, eggs, and sunglasses =-.
It’s so sad when a man can’t handle a smart women.
.-= SoccerMom´s last blog ..Valentine Week Day 5 =-.
🙂
p.s: i will be back!
.-= neers´s last blog ..re-Hashed =-.
Whoa, Victor is way off base here. Clearly he has issues about your superior intelligence. Screw it. If he’s gonna get all bossy on you, the least he could do is make it kinky!
.-= Mesina´s last blog ..Things I’ve noticed as an incapacitated pregnant lady =-.
Did Yentl wear a cat on her head?
.-= MinivanSoapbox´s last blog ..Pretty Sure My Neighbor Is A Witch =-.
No pussy cat for Victor then on Valentines Day. Haha. How do you think he’ll like that! No Chinese food!
That is a simply awesome post. You’re well funny.
.-= Fishy´s last blog ..Something Fishy in the Newspaper =-.
Ok, kittens should be used to teach everything. And that’s a lesson I think we all could learn.
.-= Amy´s last blog ..Alli… =-.
This is what psychologists call “contempt prior to investigation.” A man has to be secure enough in his masculinity to be open to learn, even if it features freakishly miniaturized kittens. Besides, the last picture has a dog in it. I want to live in a world where no one has to pretend to Barbra Streisand doing anything. Unless they are female impersonators and really want to.
.-= Mr. Paul Maul´s last blog ..POPULAR EVENTS AT THE SELF-IMPROVEMENT OLYMPICS =-.
My sister told everyone on twitter that my favorite movie is Yentl. Then I told everyone she smells finger holes and balls at the bowling alley. Then I corrected it by saying “I mean, behind the bowling alley”.
You might think that’s a disproportionate response. I don’t think so.
.-= MayoPie´s last blog ..Unauthorized product review that will probably get me sued =-.
Reason number 19 I shouldn’t be allowed on the interwebs while hungover. I didn’t realize there was a hyperlink to another website. I thought you were all talking about the creepy cat person on Chat Roulette. FAIL!
BIGGER FAIL: When Jenny tweeted about “chatroulette” I thought she was sharing a recipe for Mardi Gras parties. I read it as “chat-RUE-LAY.” I certainly wasn’t prepared for creepy cat people.
.-= Bad Guy Zero´s last blog ..This Strip Mall Has It All =-.
And looking at doggy pictures helps you learn about astrophysics, ’cause dogs are smarter than cats. 🙂
.-= Lynn from For Love or Funny´s last blog ..Two wrongs DO make a right =-.
You should listen to Victor. He got us James Garfield, for fucksake. But I am pretty sure buenobaby is a terrorist. (as evidenced by the salt on watermelon comment). If you don’ put salt on your watermelon, the terrorist have won.
You slay me, girl. I can’t think of a better way to begin my day than with your blog. My diabetic cat had an insulin shock yesterday…good think he’s ok or you would be getting a stuffed kitty to stand with James Garfield. ; )
So, I think we can safely sum up this post by saying that Victor doesn’t like pussy, right?
.-= jenn´s last blog ..The Newest Member of Our Family (No, Not a Haitian Orphan) =-.
“You’re really pretty amazing if you think about it.”
It’s like it knows me. I am amazing.
.-= Ninja´s last blog ..The hours =-.
If it was that site with the cute cats and bad spelling, well, that’s just fiiiiiiiiine. I mean, there’s a reason I get about 427 forwarded emails a day full of their picture compilations. You’re simply multitasking. And if he blocks you, call a tech friend. They will help you. Since we each have a tech friend, it’s a draw at our house.
.-= Sam´s last blog ..Song of the Camel =-.
Not down with the kitten thing myself but wondering why you have to make any excuses at all? If you want to look at kittens, look at kittens! Just own it.
.-= Ilana´s last blog ..My name is Ilana and I’m a social media addict =-.
Kick Victor in the bean bag…
.-= Eric´s last blog ..Powder Day in Minnesota =-.
Victor is merely watching his back because – hello – VICTOR Frankenstein ring a bell? No one likes to be one-upped…even if it’s just with stupid pictures of cats.
.-= moooooog35´s last blog ..Panning for Golden Showers =-.
See, if my college had offered information like that, I might have been a neuroscientist. Damn useless education.
.-= Stacy´s last blog ..Feb. 4, 2010 =-.
Haha I would have found that pretty dang useful for my cognition psych class! Awesome.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Quote of the Day =-.
ok. now i feel like i have microscopic kittens surging thru my body, helping me to taste corn and stuff. and i am allergic to cats, so now i have to go lie down until this sickness goes away. which will be NEVER since the fuckers live inside me, only i was never aware of them until now. THANKS, Jenny.
and show Victor this blog and tell him you got a day’s work outta lookin’ at the kitty science. YOU WIN.
I don’t know how you put up with him? When I see photos of kittens the first thing I think of is NEUROSCIENCE. Duh!
.-= Amy´s last blog ..Nothing is Cliche about My Husband’s Midlife Crisis =-.
So if you lose your Internet, you will have been Pussy Blocked. Which Barbra Streisand has been doing for years. I hate science.
.-= Julie, The Wife´s last blog ..It’s Whoreticulture Friday! Issue 15 =-.
Holy crap. I would have been in AP bio if I’d had that as a study guide. Or AP physics. Or whatever. Point is, I would not have set anything on fire with the gas valves in remedial chemistry. I might have done great things.
Oh my god. I totally know science now!
.-= Sugared Harpy´s last blog ..162 =-.
Dear Jenny. The toilet is the only place to use the iPhone (iPod touch in my case). I like to twee while sitting on the loo.
.-= Little Miss Moi´s last blog ..The wide empty road =-.
pfft!!! men!!! lol
.-= Denise´s last blog ..Ceramic travel mug with lid =-.
So what are you learning about neuroscience?
.-= Edgy Mama´s last blog ..Weekly parent: feed your kids, help Haiti =-.
I’ve learned that it’s very…whiskery? Fuck. I think I just proved Victor’s point.
Oh! I’ve always wondered what that movie was about. .
x,
Paula
http://www.adhocmom.com
.-= adhocmom´s last blog ..ad hoc ROMANCE =-.
Yet again, scientists are doing experiments on poor, defenceless kittehs. I hope you’re proud of yourself.
My, they’re cute.
.-= Mr Farty´s last blog ..Scientists Hate Cats =-.
Maybe Victor is all jealous since you get to check out pussies on the internet and he doesnt??
.-= Levon´s last blog ..When life gives you lemons…i guess you should just eat them right? I’d rather have money though. =-.
I’m being oppressed too! But not by Kittens or Victor… by FUCKING CORPORATE AMERICA!!!! What the hell is with you fucking HR people… part of my job is to monitor Social Medial – YES, I’m on facebook all fucking day you fucking idots… it’s the pulse of social media. My head aches… but, I’ve found the cure… Zoloft & Vodka. It’s the cocktail of champions!!
Awwww! What computer nerd can resist Kittens and science?
Victor needs to get a grip!
.-= Aunt Evolity´s last blog ..Inspiration =-.
Kittens have Neuroscience, too. All the neuros they have.
.-= K´s last blog ..What the hell, day? =-.
Lol Victor sounds like me towards my husband. He’s “working” looking at TMZ and perez Hilton. But then again, where else would I get my celebrity gossip if not from my very manly man? I love ‘im.
.-= Mamma M´s last blog ..Free Sewing Pattern For a Baby Car Seat Cover =-.
Fucking Victor.
I had to do a health project on neurotransmitters and the chemical synapse. My partner and I made a block of wood with shapes cut out to show our classmates how neurons could only go through a certain synapse if they fit. Yeah. It made no sense. We should have just brought in kittens and used them to explain it. It would have been more exciting. And cuter.
11 Bejewell
19 if you wanted to do science, you shouldn’t have been born a girl. Lesson learned.
I have no idea why cut and paste put up those two posts. But hey I am all for bejewling the fuck out of any emo chick..including me.
By emo chick I meant me. I suck at being a good person.
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..V-D Love and I Don’t Mean Venereal Disease Love Because I Don’t Know Anyone Who Loves Venereal Diseases, Except When They Happen To Horrible People =-.
I realize there are Cat People and Everyone Else in the world. But can’t we all just get along? (Victor: this means you!)
.-= The Expatresse´s last blog ..I Dunno If You’re Gonna Want to Read This =-.
glad to know i’m not the only one who hides in the bathroom to read, or eat dove dark chocolate. eating chocolate in the bathroom is not gross. what’s gross is spitting out a half chewed soggy square because your 4-yr old is demanding some.
What Victor doesn’t realize is that if my biology textbooks had looked more like that, I would have totally become a doctor… or a vet, at least.
O, blogess! a small attempt at fanism at my place for you! 🙂
poor victor? or do i get stabbed for sidin with him?
.-= neers´s last blog ..re-Hashed =-.
Tell him it has to do with blow jobs. Men don’t even question the validity of things when blow jobs are in question.
Seriously, say “these kittens are leading a class about how to give blowjobs better and more often.”
Problem. Solved.
.-= Maxie´s last blog ..would you thursday? I think it’s thursday? =-.
How can anyone not like a picture of a kitten laying on a laptop? Is he a monster? That’s classic cute right there!
Aw, the bathroom: Woman’s last sanctuary.
.-= Cathy´s last blog ..Valentine’s Day =-.
Victor desperately needs a Quaalude…
Ohhh, the best is definitely the cat eating corn on the cob. Facinating. Interestingly enough, although I’m not currently sitting on a toilet, they have a video of the corn eating kitty. Link for your research, of course. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57yZZC8kASI
And if you wait till the end, it links to sour apple sucker eating kitty.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Minnie Mouse Cupcakes. =-.
It would be even more facinating if I could fucking spell fascinating.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Minnie Mouse Cupcakes. =-.
Dear Bloggess,
I just tied my cat to a kite and tried to fly him in a lightening storm in order to learn more about electricity.
Instead, he’s peed in my bed and threw up in my shoes.
Thanks for nothing!
Science sucks!
.-= HannahBanana´s last blog ..My cats are gay! =-.
I learn more about neuroscience on your blog than I ever did in science class. You can tell Victor to just stop bloody well oppressing you because You are doing a public sevice here, hmmmph men.
Yep. When I blog about my Victor I call him That Man I Love and everyone thinks it it cute. No one seems to realize that That Man is interchangeable with Any Other Man.
.-= omgrrrl´s last blog ..Music Feeds the Soul =-.
I’m not the only person in the world who gets threatened with internet removal? Awesome!
Tell him you’re learning about the effects on enjoyment of kitten videos by the use of Xanax. It’s neurologically related…. ish…
You get service in your bathroom!?!?!
Hmpf. I have that same conversation with my own Victor when I’m reading your old blog posts.
I see it as educational, entertaining and showing loyalty.
He thinks it’s an illness.
“Are you STILL reading that blog?”
“Get off the bloody computer!”
“Are you even listening to me?”
“This milk tastes funny”
“Did you poison the milk?”
“…help me …”
blah blah blah