One of these days I’m going to get this out, complete and on time. Today is not that day.
What you missed on my sex column (which is satirical and vaguely safe for work if your boss isn’t a complete douche-canoe):
What you missed on on Good Mom/Bad Mom on the Houston Chronicle:
What you missed in my shop (which I still need to name):
What you missed on the internets:
This week on Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:
- I have no idea. Honestly, I’ve had a rough week. But if you saw something hysterical or awesome this week then leave it in the comments. I totally owe you.
This weeks wrap-up sponsored by my friend Chris who just finished his latest book “Sherlock Holmes and the Flying Zombie Death Monkeys“. It is to great literature what The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra is to fine cinema. That is to say, it is so incredibly, masterfully horrific that you will want to buy copies for everyone you know. And I’m not just saying this because Chris is my friend. Honestly, his work speaks for itself and it would be a disservice to not share a few paragraphs from the book:
The attack had taken a horrific toll. The corpses did not lie in heaps, as for the most part their mutilation was too great too allow this. I did think of sweeping all the feet into one corner, the arms into another and so forth, but where would I stop? Making a big pile of ears on a table seemed a little morbid.
“We are in good hands, for Holmes is the best at what he does.”
“Beyond question,” I lied. “The man is a genius.”
She wrinkled her face in reproachful disbelief. “There are two kinds of genius. People like Michelangelo, and the man in the pub who can play Spice Girls songs on the accordion.”
“Quite,” I murmured in surprise, wondering what she was referring to. I could only surmise that she was very ahead of her time.
Exactly. You should go buy his book now. And then go watch The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra. This is probably the best advice I’ve ever given.