I get hundreds of emails a week asking me to help with charities but I don’t do anything with them because I get too depressed when I read about them, but this particular email made me laugh in a particularly guilty sort of way so I’m reprinting it here:
Dear The Bloggess (Jenny) - First of all this email is not about advertising but this was the only address I could find, which is understandable because otherwise you would probably have crazy people emailing you day and night wanting mad things, which leads me directly to my next point. I am from Christchurch in New Zealand. Sheeps and hobbits. But also earthquakes. We had a big earthquake and now it turns out that while the good thing about an earthquake is that you can be completely obnoxious then say, "Oh, sorry, that's the earthquake talking" there are also bad things, like it squashes your central business district and also some of your friends. Probably I shouldn't say squashed. Basically, we are fucked. Excuse foul language, it is the earthquake talking. I know that there are millions(?) of disasters and this isn't very big on an international scale but if you could somewhere - even Twitter - mention my falling-to-bits city and where people can go to donate (it is here - http://www.redcross.org.nz/cms_display.php ) it would be awesome. AWESOME. I am sorry to bother you. I know you are busy and important. Like Hugh Grant but without the embarrassing hooker incident and floppy hair. Unless there is an embarrassing hooker incident I don't know about. Also, I am drunk. Probably I should have mentioned that earlier. The earthquake is a *bad influence.* Ally
Thus ends my once-a-year bout of philanthropy. I’m not sure what got into me. I blame the earthquake.