February 2011 – Page 2

WTF, Spellcheck

Oh, Spellcheck. This is exactly why no one takes you seriously:

It’s like a visit from the ghost of Christmas past but with more cursing.

I was cleaning out my 8,000+ unread emails this morning and I stumbled upon an unread email from our late, great friend ~ Nancy W. Kappes, paralegal. For those of you new to the blog you should know that Nancy was the greatest letter-writer in the history of ever, and everyone in my small worldContinue reading “It’s like a visit from the ghost of Christmas past but with more cursing.”

I THREATENED TO CUT HER: The exciting new trend no one is talking about.

I just got an email letting me know that some twitter analysis website had named me the number one trendsetter in the category of “I THREATENED TO CUT HER“. Which is odd because I’m the only person listed in this entire category. I’m pretty sure that’s not how trends work. Updated: Oh, hang on. They’veContinue reading “I THREATENED TO CUT HER: The exciting new trend no one is talking about.”

It was really funny in my head

Yesterday the doctor put me on some morphine-based medicine for a sinus-infection and it did nothing except give me the most entirely fucked-up fever dreams. The last one though was quite funny so I thought I’d write about it today because I dreamed that someone was trying to sell me those tiny easter-egg-ish containers “forContinue reading “It was really funny in my head”

I don’t even know what to say here

Every month or so I log into google analytics to see what people are searching for when they find my blog. It’s always entertaining, often perplexing and occasionally even terrifying. Here’s a screen shot of the 25th most popular keyword search for this blog: So that’s 89 separate visits of people who found this blogContinue reading “I don’t even know what to say here”

What’s really sad is that about 80% of this email exchange actually happened.

Slightly paraphrased email thread between myself and a marketing company that is trying to destroy me: Dear Blogger: We have an exciting new breakthrough to tell you about in the field of something we’d realize that you are completely against if we bothered to even read your blog. If you are interested in writing forContinue reading “What’s really sad is that about 80% of this email exchange actually happened.”