Sort yourself out, library.

A friend of mine send me this picture she took when she went to her local Texas library.

“I found your book at the annual library book sale.

I don’t think they read it.”

In fairness, there are a lot of animals in my memoir. Mostly dead ones, but still.

PS. Apropos of nothing, lately more people than usual have been taking my images, deleting the watermark and then posting the pictures on their own heavily ad-laden pages.  I understand not crediting me because that’s just how the internet works sometimes, but please don’t purposely delete my name off my images, because then I get all stabby and I get stupidly overprotective of fucking cat pictures and then this happens:

In retrospect, I probably should have used a smaller font.

 Then we all lose.  Also, you can totally steal this picture and not credit me.  Now I’m going to go have a drink and reprioritize a bit.  Sorry for screaming.


And in entirely unrelated news, it’s time for the weekly wrap up:

What you missed in my shop (tentatively called “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):

What you missed on the internets:

This week on shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:

This week’s wrap-up is sponsored by the wonderific folks at Lookmatic, your one-stop online store for all your eyewear needs offering the latest in designer, high fashion sunglasses or cheap prescription glasses with lenses. Secure and easy online shopping with a wide selection of unique and custom designed frames.  You should probably check it out.

120 thoughts on “Sort yourself out, library.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. What! It’s a national treasure. Please send us the name of this library branch so we can start a campaign of writing them some VERY severely worded letters.

    Maybe, if it escalates, we’ll have to get a little disparaging.

  2. Copernicus is giving interviews now? It seems like they might end badly…like, you know, with murder.

  3. Wait, I thought the book was the memoir of that mouse on the cover. Are you telling me you aren’t really a mouse?


  4. I know you’re feeling really bad, Jenny and have for more than a week. I can tell now when you blog, or don’t, and what the topic is. Know that thousands of fans are pulling for you and by your side. We love you. And respect and admire you. Hang in there. Much love, Donna

  5. Well, given the mac and cheese incident cited in said book–and the fact that eating mice would be disturbing– at least it wasn’t found in the “Cooking” wing of the place.

  6. Your friend could have added the word “dead” on the sign above animals? and then “and other kick ass stuff” beneath animals? THEN it would have been in the appropriate place!

  7. But isn’t that exactly what you want them to think right before you hit them upside the head with the funny? “Hey look, animals!” Then BAM BIG FUNNY RIGHT IN THERE!

  8. Think of all the worse sections it could have been in. Ancient history– what a slap in the face! Diet/Self-Help– could be considered a compliment OR an insult. Fiction– like anyone could make that stuff up!

  9. Jenny, have what you’ve given me – a FLAMETHROWER! Because sometimes wine and sticks don’t quite cut it when the mind-zombies invade.

  10. I think we could argue that your book featured MANY animals, but most of them were dead. Except for the urine bobcats…those were TOTALLY living.

  11. To be fair, they never processed the book for the library (you can tell because there are no labels on the spine and no shiny mylar cover over the dust jacket). Most likely this was a donation to the library that they couldn’t use – prolly cause they already had so many copies – so they sold it to raise money for the library instead. Though obviously a volunteer who did not read the book OR the subjects listed on the inside did the sorting for the sale. Makes me wonder what gems wwre found in the memoir section..

  12. Fun to think who might gift it to an animal lover or like, normal person. Thanks for the pinterest reminder, just followed. Howling at How Not To Pose With Your Dog!

  13. I just finished listening to your book and I wish you had an audio version of your blog, updated daily, so I could listen to you telling me stories every day. I realize this might be a difficult undertaking, but, since your book not only helped you, it helped me and countless others to heal and become better people, which healthier people leads to healthier, stronger communities, which leads to a strong nation, you need to do this to help America. Shit, Jenny, don’t let the terrorists win!

  14. I put your book on the truck for interlibrary loan this week. I’m thrilled and wave it at my coworkers every time I see it. I’m like “no, seriously, it’s hilarious AND she actually followed me back on Twitter! Read it!”

  15. Hahaha, terrible! Guess they saw the mouse on the cover & assumed the animals section is where it must belong – so much for reading the actual book description!

  16. Kudos on being the insides of a funny lady sammy!!! I in fact read Tina’s book, loved it, found Mindy’s, loved it, then my ever so thoughtful Nook recommended your book based on my previous choices. And the rest, as they say, is history! I’ve been enjoying your hilarious quirky twisted real ramblings ever since! So let’s just agree that you and I were introduced by our mutual good friends Tina Fey and Mindy Kaling. Yep that’s how I remember it.

  17. People thinking your book is just about mice reminds me of a quote from The Simpsons. 😉

    Homer: Doughnut?
    Lisa: No, thanks. Do you have any fruit?
    Homer: This has purple stuff inside. Purple is a fruit.

  18. They’re probably old or jealous or both. But it will come back to bite them on the ass! It always does…

    Will you please put little indicators on the articles that are gonna make us cry!? I’m all laughing my ass off one minute and crying the next. People already think I’m unstable (mostly because I am), but I don’t need to add fuel to the fire, woman!

    PS: I’ve always got plenty sticks for any of my fellow Lawsbians. Just email me or holla through my blog. We crazies gotta have each other’s backs!

  19. My local library has it on display with non-fiction and on audio. I happen to run my local library.

  20. Maybe your book has been sneakily (which is totally a word) placed in the animal section to expose it (in the non-pornographic way) to a new audience. Kinda the way my mom would chop up a shitload of vegetables to go in the spaghetti sauce because I would eat spaghetti, but I wouldn’t eat vegetables.

    Dear God, I just compared your book to vegetables. But in a good way. Crap. I’m going to stop talking about vegetables now. Except that now I want a salad. The good kind, with meat in it. Logging off now to go to Dairy Queen.

  21. Ha! Thinking of the person who buys the book thinking it’s about animals makes me laugh more. And btw…why is your book being sold at the library book sale? Isn’t a library book sale for old, worn out books? Somebody has some explaining to do!

  22. The idea that someone will buy your book thinking it’s about animals is making me laugh. Boy, are they in for a surprise!

  23. Loved your book…been along tome since I laughed out loud while reading. And, I can totally relate to anxiety ridden neurotic ramblings…seems you have a following of a likened…previously unnamed species…glad to have a place to call home…looking forward to more pretending it never happened…Ang

  24. Well, it does kind of look like “Stuart Little Goes to Summer Shakespeare Camp”. which I would totally read.

  25. Now following boggle the owl to show to my mom. I don’t know if she has ever thought about ending it, but I know she has suffered from depression for the majority of her life and I have always been impressed that she made it through so much before medication and then even with the side-effects of medication (her tongue now sticks out on its own without her control) she keeps on going and trying to do everything she feels she needs to do to be a good person.

    The book on the animal table does seem oddly appropriate considering the first several chapters.

  26. Jenny, thanks for linking to Boggle. That tumblr was exactly what I needed right now. I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear nice words today. Because of this link, I think I’m going to make it through the day.

  27. Clearly, someone read it, at least up to and including “Jenkins, you Motherfucker”.

  28. I’m sitting next to the pool where I like to hang out in the summer in exchange for a stupid amount of money (especially considering I live 3/4 of a mile from Lake Michigan) with tears streaming down my face.

    GIVE ME A STICK – I couldn’t love that more

  29. That library is on drugs. That’s the only explanation I can come up with for them selling your book. Nobody is taking my copy unless they pry it out of my cold, dead hands

  30. looks like it is between animals and gardening, maybe they were pretending it didn’t happen?

  31. If you look carefully, the section to the right is gardening books; therefore, this is exactly where you would put a book on dead animals (between live animal books and the gardening…because we all know that where you are supposed to bury them).

  32. The Nail?

    That was the best thing I have ever seen.

    The men of the world are sending you a thank-you check for $100 trillion gazillion dollars.

    Thank you.

    On behalf of all men, everywhere.

  33. Maybe they took the underwater breathing squirrels thing to heart…

  34. Wow. They think your book is about animals because it has a taxidermied mouse on the cover? That makes it very obvious that no one at that library ever read it. Yikes.

  35. Maybe that copy of your book is so worn out that they had to buy several new copies. Seems like a more reasonable explanation than it wasn’t getting checked out.

  36. Hi, Jenny. I just wanted to hand you a virtual stick or two. It’s always such a pleasant surprise when I open up my reader and see that you’ve posted something new. I had never heard of Boggle, by the way, but will definitely have to bookmark it. Hopefully we can all give each other some sticks. Or maybe key lime pies, because we need sustenance as well.

    Thursday night I was up quite late, which is typical, but I was reading the comments on your post prior to this one. It’s amazing how the oddest, small things can help. I showered Friday, and it was good to know that I’m not the only one who can forget this. At least it opens up the possibility than taking care of oneself can actually feel good. I also made it out of the house for a few hours on Saturday. Tomorrow I may even call a therapist, who knows. I hope things are improving for you, or that they will soon.

  37. Hey there- Here’s something that might make you smile. I spotted Beyonce’s twinkle twin! I’m driving down Hwy 16 between Fredericksburg and Kerrville, going to visit my father for Father’s Day, when low and behold there he is in all his glory! He was guarding a gate near the highway. He was, in fact, standing in the back of a big wooden wagon, guarding the gate, because you know a 5 foot tall metal chicken is just not as scary as a 7 foot metal chicken…

  38. Maybe you should volunteer to do a live reading, and you could sit there surrounded by Beyonce the beloved chicken and all the stuffed DEAD animals that you have collected. I’m sure Victor would help transport them there with you, in the hope that some got lost for return ………

  39. My one-and-a-half-year-old granddaughter Coraline loves the animals on the end papers of your book. She’ll point to each one and ask me to name them over and over again. Then she searches for the cow and acts surprised every time she finds it. As far as she’s concerned, your book is about the animals.

  40. I agree…someone taking pictures of your family members/cats, and changing them…super creepy. Not like clowns with a knife creepy, but totally clowns smiling at you while sitting on a toilet creepy.

  41. It’s Ferris Mewler’s fault for being so damned lovable! Everyone wants to have a piece of him on their website..but do it the right way people. Don’t make Jenny stab you!

  42. ALL your pictures should have that message! And I wonder if a kid will pick up your book at the library book sale…

  43. This won’t make you feel better, but I built a company website with technical illustrations (one was insanely difficult) and not one but three Chinese companies took the entire thing, changed the product names and called it their own. I’m hip to the desire to inflict pain over it.

  44. This is my first visit to your blog in quite a while (I’m a Zazzler who’s trying to live more in the “real” world lately). BTW, I’m here “Because wine”… someone please tell me to go to bed NOW. Seriously.

  45. People don’t cut out watermarks from copyrighted material, leeches do… 🙂

  46. I think now everything I post on FB, or Twitter I’m going to add JL just because

  47. And where is the MF’ing like button for other comments??????? Jeez!!!

  48. Well, obviously one of the library workers wanted their own copy of your book for cheap. So they took it from one of the several copies waiting to be placed on the shelf (because library books that are in demand and borrowed that much wear out quickly) and snuck it onto the sale table. Smart thinking putting it on the animal table, so all the other eager library sale shoppers would be confused and delayed in snatching it up.

  49. Not to put too fine a point on it, but if the internet were filled with dog pictures instead of cat pictures, no one would steal your watermark. Dog people are loyal. Just saying.

    But you and your cat still kick ass, so there’s that.
    Congrats on your awesome book sales!

  50. No, it is not Tories, the British traitors, as the autocorrect keeps trying to make it. Simply Torie, my own version of Tori, short for Victoria. Yeah, I have to be different.

    The real reason for my post, not my drunken rambling reasoning…

    I love you, you make me smile! They steal your shit because you are awesome and they want to be you. We are only so lucky to come this close (the Internet stalking I do) to knowing you. Thank you for being you & being awesome.

  51. That sucks that someone would do that. I can understand wanting to use a picture and not knowing where it came from, but purposely taking away a watermark is a dick move.

  52. Wow that’s a whole lot of effort for people to go to cutting your name off the picture. Far too much time on their hands obv.
    Your friends library is shite. Fancy selling your book. Although to be fair – i’m not sure i’d know how to categorise it either, I think it’s in a category all of its own 😉

  53. Bwahahaha that’ll teach them! Unless of course they delete your name and add their own, then they are taking credit for a funny image. Internet-ness sucks sometimes

  54. Are you kidding me?
    On both counts?

    Part of me wants to redo a bunch of book covers and stealthily place them on random books in libraries.
    “Ooooh – The Old man and the sea, the cover has a photo of an old guy playing shuffle board on a cruise ship, written by some guy called Ernie – that TOTALLY has to go in the ‘Travel’ pile”

    As to the practice of ripping other people’s stuff… it makes my eye twitch, and gives me a deep and powerful urge to scream mother-fucker. A lot.

  55. Why would ANYONE steal your picture and post it without crediting you for it?! You’re FARKING AMAZING! If I stole one of your pictures, I would be all: “The Bloggess made this, and if you don’t read her yet, then you should, because she’s amazeballs and junk. Go read (?) now because if you don’t, your penis will shrivel up and die. If you don’t have a penis, then you’ll totally grow one if you don’t read this. Because that’s how this works. Also: If you don’t read Jenny’s blog, we can no longer be friends, and I also hate you a little bit right now…”

  56. I have on occasions reposted pictures of Hunter S Thomcat on my pinterest board, but always always with this in the description via @TheBloggess aka Jenny Lawson. anyone who doesn’t is a mean poopyhead and needs a hug from Copernicus.

    I am a hobbyist digital artist and the amount of times I’ve come across my work on other people’s art sites with my name taken off and theirs put on makes me sad.

  57. So I switch gears and put on my library assistant hat since I wear it a few days a week. Um… hello? Title has “memoir” in it. Biography! We have you nicely shelved as B LAW, if you’re super into the numbers thing it would be 920 LAW. And what book sale only has a few books? We had one this weekend, sold like nothing and we still have tons of books left over! And we didn’t even think of selling your book. But in fairness to this possibly misguided library I’ll add they probably had more than 1 copy and are thinning the collection (we do that – not enough space!) and they probably have some not-so-bright-but-well-meaning volunteers setting up & running the book sale who obviously don’t read the covers and just go by the art. Which can be dangerous. Your book was my staff pick the last time they asked me.

  58. Most library sale books are donated.

    I have gotten my husband reading you now. He asked me about the book I was reading, so I started telling him and then he had to look it up and then started checking out your blog. He was cracking up! 🙂

  59. My friend was going through a bit of a down period and I gave her your book (because it’s like a hug, if a book could hug) and she is obsessed with you now, too. Basically we are going to start a Jenny Lawson cult/religion and you are our god.

  60. Per image theft – stealing is stealing, period, and at the very least internet image stealing should be punishable by locking the perp in a room to watch Battlefield Earth with mariachi music playing in the background on a loop with wine, Aleve and earplugs in an unbreakable plexiglass cube. Fuckers.

  61. As far as I know, no one has ever stolen any of my photos, but then again, maybe it’s just I’ve never stumbled upon it. The thing that pisses me off is that the only way to protect them (other than not publicly posting them) is to defile them with a watermark. It ruins a picture. It just does. So then I try to preserve artistic integrity by posting them as is and hoping like hell they never get stolen. Some people just suck.

  62. People may even do that but your true fans will see them and say where they came from. No one can pass Beyoncé or Juanita as something other than purely yours! <3

  63. Be sure to space only once after a period. The old double space rule onlyappliedto typewriters.

    (I can’t help it. Typing class ruined me forever. ~ Jenny)

  64. Just curious – How do you discover that you’ve been ripped off?

    I don’t think I’ve been ripped off, but how would I know?

  65. You tempt the pic theives with those awesome pics. Lol I would have never thought to take an image from your site girl. People are far more awake than I am I guess.

    Library- was it one in East Texas I wonder??

    Hope you are enjoying the summer!! It’s like the depths of hell here sometimes.. Lol xoxo

  66. A lot of bloggers are crying foul over their work being stolen. It seems to be an epidemic. Get your own shit word and picture thieves!

  67. I know it really sucks, but on the plus side at least your overall ownership of this intellectual properly is clear. They might have stolen it but the 1 million times you’ve posted it on your blog/Pinterest/twitter etc. prove authentic ownership is yours… not to mention that we, your rabid fan base, will defend you at every turn! The REAL problem would be if someone had stolen the image, title or stories from your book… BEFORE it was published. This is epically irritating but that would have been devastating, and does happen. So keep protecting that book-destined material before it’s published, like you’ve been doing, and when this crap happens just point us in the direction you wish our rage to land.

  68. If you’re using a Mac, embed your copyright info into your images using Bridge—part of the Adobe Suite. Then search online for the software—it may even be freeware—that allows you to comb the internets searching for your images. (I suck at remembering names of all/any things or I’d give you better direction.) Then sic your attorneys on them! You may also try to make your watermark visible and have it overlap into the subject area, it makes cropping/photoshopping it out more trouble than it’s usually worth. (I’ve never noticed a watermark on any of your blog images, BTW.) (Oh, and if you’ve never used Bridge much before, you don’t know what you’re missing—gim’mee a shout and I can give you a quick run down if needed. It’s a must-have application for several reasons.)

    As for that lyin’ depression bitch, may I suggest a comfy lawn/lounge chair out in the yard with a Tim Dorsey book, a cooler of your favorite beverage and a cheap 6-8 ft kiddie pool. The lounge chair gets you out of bed, but still lets you “rest.” Being outside helps with the vitamin D and fresh air, which the bitch hates. The cooler saves you from having to put the book down and make the long tiring trip back into the house. The kiddie pool’s for cooling off, plus it’s fun and funny. But, the Tim Dorsey books are the coupe de grace—after a couple paragraphs, you’re sucked into his insane/hysterical/maniacal characters and nothing else matters! Read them in the order they’re written and keep them on the shelf. The last dregs of depression don’t stand a chance with a Tim Dorsey book around! Sunshine, wine, and Tim Dorsey—helps a little, every time. (That and staying away from caffeine—coffee triggers my anxiety every effin’ time! and coming down can suck for days.) Seriously, it’s a cheap Rx, and unless you try to emulate one of Dorsey’s characters, it’ll help get you out of bed and keep you out of jail.


  69. I have my pictures stolen and used ALL THE TIME and it pisses me off so much. Earlier this year a national company took one of my (MINE. IT’S MY PICTURE.) cat pictures, slapped THEIR LOGO on it and posted it on Facebook. I lost my shit all over Facebook and they took it down and sent (not enough, in my opinion) coupons for free litter to the shelter I foster for. What made me the maddest was that someone suggested I should be grateful that they STOLE AND USED MY PICTURE IN THE FIRST PLACE GAHHHHHHHH.

    And ALL I WANT is credit for having taken the damn picture, it isn’t like I’m even looking for money.

    Clearly I have issues, and I don’t think you’re overreacting, is what I’m saying.

  70. ummmm hello… internet = free, right?

    Sadly, I had to explain to a VP of IT about the difference between public domain, all rights reserved, royalty free and outright theft about some images he wanted me to use. First he wanted me to Photoshop out the stock company trademark. When I said I couldn’t do that, he sent me an image he grabbed off the web. I explained I couldn’t use it either. “But I Googled and there it was! It’s in the public domain now!” I tried to explain that it’s like hearing a song on the radio doesn’t mean you can claim that song as your own. “We used to tape songs off the radio all the time. That’s dumb.” He finally agreed not to use Googled images but I don’t think he ever fully understood. I find solace in similar accounts on

  71. The pic of your book on the table had me howling. Whoever set up the table should learn how to read book covers instead of just looking at the pretty pictures . . .

  72. Have you ever seen the Jedi Training Academy? It makes me cry, the entire time, every time. It is a child’s dream come true. It is my dream come true. If they allowed adults to do it there would be a fucking riot and Disneyland would burn to the ground. It is an amazing thing and whoever came up with it is a genius. Crying again. Seriously, if you go to Disney, even if you don’t have kids, do yourself a favor and watch it at least once. I can’t be the only person who cries EVERY time, right?

  73. Maybe an animal put your book on that table?
    Also, love everything in this post.
    I know, super-original comment.

  74. Yep, sometimes it’s the nail.

    Or to put it another way, “Maybe, just maybe, that strategy of identifying and fixing problems with effective solutions is actually better than milking them for the counterfeit riches of sympathy and ‘there there’s.”

  75. is advertising the audio on facebook — you just popped up in my feed as a suggested post (which normally I loathe, but I’ll make an exception) and in less than three minutes it’s been shared 35 times.

  76. My cousin is in this month’s O Magazine, but with Copernicus in there too it’s just too much awesome. Well, except that I don’t like Oprah Winfrey. But other than that.

  77. I found your book in my brother’s library.
    …well his room actually, the day after he left for college when I raided it for any and all valuables he had not taken with him.

    ‘Tis a very good book. So good in fact that it has since been stolen from me by my other brother. :/

  78. Jenny, I love your watermark commentary. Can I steal the conceptual idea and put similar text on one of my photos? Replacing your name with mine of course. I have people who steal my photos as well and that is basically all I have to offer since I don’t have a witty blog. Should I add that if I don’t hear back from you I will take that as an agreement that I have permission steal your watermark idea. That way it is a win win, I get to use the idea and you don’t actually have to read this comment to object. Cheers.

  79. “People. What a bunch of bastards.”

    ~The IT Crowd

    Which, if you aren’t already watching it on DVD, you totally should be. That’s some funny shit right there. Love those Brits.

  80. I HATE, when I see my images or text on someone else’s website…I have had more than a couple of blogs taken down for that exact issue. It is just plain rude to steal someone else’s content. If you can’t come up with your own shit, perhaps you need to not be the owner of a website/blog…grrr.

  81. The question isn’t “why are they selling your book?” It’s why they’re not selling your book with the taxidermy chinchilla with a monocle that came with it. Not cool library. That’s like selling the Barbie out-of-the-box without the stripper heels.

  82. I’m pretty sure this was at the library book sale in Abilene this past weekend, which I went to TWICE and never saw your book, or I would have totally flipped out. I am ashamed and more than just a little angry that I didn’t see it! Sigh.

  83. At my local library they have books on InDesign shelved along with the books on carpentry and home construction. Because, you know, “Adobe”.

  84. If that library’s like the one I help out in, the person who ordered the books could have accidentally ordered more than one copy. It’s happened a LOT!

  85. Hi Jenny;
    I just finished your book. It has been a long time since I enjoyed a read so thoroughly from beginning to end as I did “Let’s Pretend…” I especially want to thank you for addressing the reality of anxiety attacks. You put into words what I’ve been trying to explain for years.
    Thank you, and looking forward to your next book.

  86. I have no desire to steal your images. What I do want is your Restoration Hardware chair which I adore!

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