MEEP.

me: Do you think Beaker and The Road Runner are related?

Victor:  My head hurts already.

me:  I mean, logically they wouldn’t be related because one is a muppet and the other one isn’t real, but they both speak the same “Meep!  Meep!” language.  That has to mean something.

Victor:  Um…Muppets aren’t real either.

me:  Shut your mouth.

Victor:  Anyway, Beaker only says “meep” once at a time.  The Road Runner always says it twice.

me:  So Beaker is just less talkative?

Victor:  It might be a different dialect.

me:  Or maybe The Road Runner has a stammer?

Then Victor walked off because I think he was intimidated by this level of mental discourse and I went to look up Beaker’s language and it turns out that Beaker is actually saying “Me!  Me!  Me!” which is sort of the sign of a psychopathic narcissist.  I don’t have a point to this except to say that I feel like my whole childhood was a lie.

Vaguely related:

146 thoughts on “MEEP.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I subscribe to the theory proposed by this comic that Beaker can speak English just fine. basicinstructions.net/basic-instructions/2008/9/15/how-to-reveal-a-shocking-truth-to-a-person-whos-not-ready-fo.html

  2. I just LOVE anything Muppet-related; but Chef doesn’t speak anything but mock-Swedish, “hagen dazsen” stuff so I’m wondering how he and especially Animal managed to coherently lip-sync a Beastie Boys song… BUT, I love the song AND Muppets (who are OBVIOUSLY real!) so thumbs-up. 😉

  3. Victor doesn’t know what he’s talking about. And I appreciate you NOT posting a poll about this one, because I just ate lunch and your polls always make me hungry.

  4. Wow. I don’t even think I have a response to this today….because now I realize my childhood was too. And this, after a conversation with the kids about how Pepe LePew was all kinds of date-rapey.
    Le sigh.

  5. Of course they’re real. They’ve got street cred in spades in this video. Victor is just jealous because he can’t bust a rhyme.

  6. Muppets are real!!!! I saw their live show at Disney, Victor is very confused.
    Have you seen the Meeping Angel picture?? Thought of you when I saw it.

  7. Complete fascist bullshit.

    I know Muppets are real because Kermit makes me cry when he sings am the old men in the balcony make me laugh.

    The End.

  8. how do you shut-down and sleep with a train of thoughts like that rushing through your brain?

  9. So if the muppets aren’t real, then the fraggles are fake too? I don’t like Victor right now!

  10. I don’t have any pithy answers. But I am divorced from a pathological narcissist, so I felt that compelling enough to add. He is his own worst enemy unfortunately, and I feel very sorry for him. I went through your blog with a fine-toothed comb the other day, when before I just occasionally made a little trip over here. Somewhere I read that you have a personality disorder. Well, I want to stand up and say: I am a blogger and I have a personality disorder, just like they do in AA. Because bloggers just don’t allow that much information out unless they have a death wish. And blogging is much of my income, so I do not have a death wish. But I want to say I am gladdened to know you said it first.
    Brenda

  11. True story: my husband presented a paper on muppets and representations of ethnicity at a conference last year.

  12. I know comments are in moderation, so I wanted you to know that my blog is Cozy Little House. http://www.cozylittlehouse.com
    I saw that your comments don’t get directed to the blog of the commenter. And I wanted to say a personal thank you for helping me see that I should be myself instead of tiptoeing around the person I wish I was. I thought a person who has a personality disorder and admits it should be able to see who the other one is who just admitted it.
    Brenda

  13. If The Muppet Show wasn’t a real backstage peek at a show, then that means “B.J. and the Bear” wasn’t real, which means you couldn’t have a chimp as a companion on long-haul trucking trips and if you can’t have that, what are we doing here?

  14. I have seen the muppets but I have never seen Victor. So either Victor isn’t real or he’s God (who’s reality I’m also kind of on the fence about).

  15. I’m convinced that every webinar I’ve ever had the pleasure of attending had been hosted by a Muppet. I think that’s really one of the few non-entertainment related careers out there for Muppets who choose not to enter show business.

  16. Wait, what? I named a chicken Beaker specifically because I always believed that he was saying ‘Meep’…. now not only is my whole life a lie, my poor chicken’s whole life was a lie.

  17. I’m going to vote for not related because the Roadrunner is a bird and Beaker is a human with a speech impediment. Plus the Roadrunner actually says “beep beep”. And that’s too far from “me” to justify a relation. My mind is also blown because I always thought Beaker said “meep” too. This rivals the time I realized the Swedish Chef has human hands.

  18. Uh, I have met Yoda’s mom, like in person and stuff. And her husband. They made a bunch of Muppets and they are TOTALLY real!

  19. i don’t know why, but i expected there to be more posts tagged “beaker.” i was incorrect.

  20. We just watched the Muppet Treasure Island movie and my daughter was trying to figure out what types of animals/people all the Muppets are. She decided that Beaker was an earthworm.

  21. In the original Muppet Movie, Beaker clearly says, “Sadly temporary,” about the results of the potion that Dr. Bunsen Honeydew has made. His meeping is just a speech impediment. If he wasn’t real he wouldn’t have a speech impediment, duh.

  22. I once sang and entire repertoire of Christmas carols all in the voice of beaker while decorating the Christmas tree. It drove my sister crazy and to this day she still talks about how crazy it made her. I feel as though I aced my sisterly duties that day.

  23. Completely unrelated, but it made me think of you and those of us who comment. In the “Dear Prudence” column on Slate on Aug. 5, there is someone complaining about how her husband was engaged before they married, and that fiance passed away before the wedding, and now her mom says he needs to marry her ghost to appease her spirit. ANYWAY, you need to read the comments, because everyone started making puns about where you’d register for a spirit wedding. (Bed, Bath and Beyond? Bone Depot?). I feel like everyone who follows you would enjoy those comments 🙂

  24. I’m not convinced that Beaker is saying “Me!” I believe it is a different, but related, dialect. “Meep” and “Me” sounds a lot like, say, “Going” and “Goin”…you know, like “Goin’ fishin’ Leroy.” Maybe it’s a Cockney “Meep” and instead of dropping the “h” Beaker is dropping the “ep.” I’m pretty sure you’ve got a case, Jenny. I’d contact the local university and talk to their Linguistics Department. Perhaps one of the graduate students could research this subject for his/her thesis. FASCINATING STUFF…

  25. Please tell me you’ve been to the Muppet Channel on YouTube to watch their music videos (under the “Mostly Music” playlist). Beaker’s Ode To Joy never fails to make me laugh my arse off.

  26. Look Victor I’m already sad enough from the untimely passing of Mr. R. Williams and now you tell me Muppets aren’t real, which as 1stepcloser pointed out, would mean Fraggles aren’t real, and that is not a world I can live in. I’m just going to keep believing in Fraggles and Muppets because they ARE TOO REAL!

  27. Here’s my take on it…
    There’s perhaps a yin/yang twin thing going on. Beaker is always getting the raw end of life (by being in horrible “accidents” created by Bunson), while RR is always WAY ahead of Wile E. Cyote, Genius. So, it’s almost like they’re opposites. Maybe they’re cousins.
    And it’s Definitely MEEP! Right?!?! Victor lies.

  28. The only reality in which I am comfortable living, is one where I allow myself the possibility of running into a Muppet nonchalantly grocery shopping.

  29. As far as their lot in life is concerned, Beaker has more in common with Wile E. Coyote than with the Road Runner. Both Beaker and Mr. Coyote suffer cruel injuries repeatedly and yet always seem to spring back just in time for more injuries to occur. Of course, Mr. Coyote is just experiencing karmic revenge for trying to kill and eat an innocent (well, mischievous but mostly innocent) Road Runner. Beaker is just Dr. Bunsen Honeydew’s glorified lab rat.

    In related news, I have a Beaker and Honeydew set where they are dressed as C-3PO and R2D2 respectively. Never has C-3PO’s quote of “We seem to be made to suffer. It’s our lot in life.” been so appropriate.

  30. MUPPETS ARE REAL. How else would they be able to drive that Toyota in the commercial. You need to play Victor the “ain’t go no room for boring” jingle, because he needs less boring in his life. Oh wait, he’s already got you.

  31. I’ll have you know, the library world considers Muppets “real (or fictitious) non-human entities” and they can be creators (e.g. authors, illustrators, singers, etc.). So can dogs. And cats. We have a very liberal view of what constitutes an author. So they exist. Take that, Victor!

  32. I am so glad to know that the Road Runner and Beaker have been in someone else’s conversation this week. I knew there were people like me!

  33. snort Muppets are SO TOTALLY REAL. Surely everyone knows that?

    The hubs and I have roundly debated whether our monster cat is more closely related to Sweetums or Beaker since he holds whole Meep-y conversations with us, but also knocks everything over whilst playing Ninja Kat games with his sister.

  34. Muppets are ok. They’re the ‘missing link’ between humans and those evil animatronic things at chuck-e-cheese. As long as no one is doing ventriloquism with them which I still think is some weird sex act

  35. I’ll just chime in:
    1) Muppets are real. Victor is wrong.
    2) I always thought The Roadrunner said, “Beep Beep!”

  36. Muppets always kinda wigged me out for some reason. Maybe it’s because they were sort of like ventriloquist dummies (which are horrifying), just without the ventriloquist sitting there. I don’t know. Also terrifying? Those stop-motion Barbie commercials where Barbie appears to move on her own and do cartwheels. That shit nearly sent me running screaming. Eeeeeeugh.

  37. Also, if Breaker says, “Me! Me!” is it more likely he’s related to the seagulls in Finding Nemo?

  38. Puppets freak me out… Dark Crystal… The guys that steal the baby in Labyrinth… Fraggle rock… But the Road Runner and his Wiley Friend? TOTALLY real! Just Sayin;

  39. Where is the poll so we can vote on this? Also, one of the options for the answers would “WHAT!?! Beaker isn’t saying MEEP??,” and that is what I would select.

  40. You wrote ‘Road Runner’ but I read it as ‘Road Warrior’. Now can’t not think of Beaker tooling around the post-apocalyptic Outback in some sort of mutant Muppetmobile.

  41. I always thought Professor Honeydew had done something horrible, and then made it so Beaker couldn’t tell anyone about it. He’s saying Me Me Me to draw attention to the horror that has been done to him. Maybe it wasn’t Honeydew, maybe he just found him that way and rescued Beaker from an even crazier scientist.

  42. I thought the roadrunner was all “Beep! Beep!”
    (And is it just me or does Charles Krauthammer not look JUST LIKE the Eagle muppet?)

  43. Okay, for once, I am siding with Victor. I find muppets to be very creepy and I am happier if they are not real. Please don’t block me.

  44. Get that lawyer. Muppets are definitely real. And clearly they need to break out in to more covers of different songs, because that Beastie Boys video made my week.

  45. The road runner only said it yo get attention !!! And if its on TV and shows up on an internet search , especially in Wikipedia , then its real !!

  46. According to Muppet wiki, Beaker’s saying “Meee meee meee,” but books and merchandise do spell it out as “meep.” Maybe Beaker doesn’t emphasize the “P” when he talks because he doesn’t want to cause issues with the sketchy microphones at the Muppet theater 🙂

  47. Oh, Jenny. I think Victor and my husband could probably spend all day talking about their wives. And how lucky they are to have us.

  48. Ima let you finish, Victor, but Beaker’s contribution to the Muppet Barbershop Quartet’s cover of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” is the best meep of all time.

  49. Not only are the Muppets real, but Beaker is the GREATEST OF THEM ALL. I always sing along with his verse in “12 Days of Christmas.” Glorious.

    But I don’t think he’s related to the Roadrunner. They don’t look anything alike.

  50. Hmmm, do you ever watch Phineas and Ferb? There is a space alien do-gooder named MEEP who says ‘meep’. Maybe they are related somehow esp now that Disney owns the Muppets and Phineas and Ferb are also Disney owned.

  51. This reminds me of when I used to make jewelry and people would always show me their baubles and ask “Is this real?” My answer was always “Unless we’re simultaneously hallucinating it, it pretty much has to be…” They eventually stopped after I went all Joe-Bob on them and said “I’m surprised I have to explain this to y’all…”

  52. To say the muppets aren’t real is to blow apart my whole childhood fr-amily. That’s wrong, man.

  53. That video made my morning. I had no idea the muppets had gotten so cool. And there’s more muppet rapping on youtube. I may have to skip work this morning to watch muppets rapping. Thanks!

  54. We have it from Ferb’s own…um, handler at Disney that Ferb is cousins with Beaker. Check out the face shape. Totally related.

  55. Having just watched “Finding Nemo” last night, I need to suggest that Beaker and Road-Runner both speak a dialect of “Seagull”. For my evidence, this bit of witty dialog:
    “Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine….” –the seagulls

  56. I’m going to say this one time (before I inevitably say it again at some random later day): Regardless of the absolute shit going on in my life, you can instantly make me think, laugh senselessly, nod frantically, and realize I suddenly have to pee all at the same time. And I’m sure I’m not alone there. Seriously, you’re like an extra cardio workout for the reader. So thank you for that.

  57. Roadrunners ARE real– I see them routinely at the Veloway. They don’t make a lot of noise, however, and they’ve never gone “meep meep” within earshot of me. They do, however, remind me of what an Archeopteryx must have looked like.
    By the way, there’s a great bike benefit for Cove House, the emergency homeless shelter in Copperas Cove, this weekend. There are rides of many different lengths for folks who were sitting there thinking, “Where can I ride a few miles over rolling hills this Saturday?” Me and the Tiger are going, just so you know.

  58. Jenny. I. Love. You. You are perfect in so many ways. Now I give you banananut da da da da da. Banananut da da dat dan. I hope that worked cause Beaker is now speaking in my head probably for the better part of the day.

  59. While the jury may still be out on the Beeker/Road Runner question. I think this proves beyond a doubt that Tom Waits and Cookie Monster are indeed the same species.

  60. Victor just ruined my childhood. And Kelly don’t diss Pepe. He’s not a rapist, he’s just horny

  61. If the muppets aren’t real, how come I know a professor who has his own? Answer that Victor!
    And not just he went out and bought one. Someone actually used him as a template for a muppet. I’ve seen it.

  62. I love that you think about these things. I don’t feel so alone knowing muppet and roadrunner heritages are being discussed. Good job and keep asking the big questions. Someone has to.

  63. I wish Victor’s confusion was sadly temporary (meeply meeporary). Of course Muppets are real — they signed the standard rich and famous contract.

    I find a strange comfort in thinking that, in a few weeks, you will see an uptick in visitors to this site who googled “What is Beaker saying”.

  64. I have seen Beaker talking with his speech impediment during the Muppet 3D Ride at Disney’s Hollywood Studios, Fl. I think he also makes a cameo on the mystery on the latest Disney Cruise ship “Fantasy” … Fantasy ship but yet a real ship. Same goes for the muppets! Protected by Disney just like the animals at Animal Kingdom 🙂

  65. To Monica in comment 45 and Marianne in comment 93, I always thought the roadrunner said beep-beep, too — like a car horn. I was totally surprised when one of my friends was convinced he said meep, but since then it seems that the people who think he meeps are the majority. However if you look up the advertising for the Plymouth Roadrunner, which licensed use of the image from Warner Bros., he clearly says beep-beep in all the ads: http://www.lhmopars.com/MOPAR_Ads/68rr-ad2.html, http://38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ltcyicefAV1qdcd2wo1_1280.jpg, http://www.cartype.com/pics/1629/small/chrysler-plymouth_road-runner_decal_67.jpg, https://ccco.s3.amazonaws.com/kb_photos/223/1760_1971_PLYMOUTH_ROAD_RUNNER_low_res.jpg, etc.

    I have no idea what Beaker actually says…..

  66. Of course The Muppets are real. How would they run a business otherwise? I’ve seen them on chat shows and everything.

  67. To me, the muppets are real. I’ve seen them in movies. Unless I’m losing my mind they’re celebrities.

    I grew up on the muppets. They’re so cool. I may see the future, and hear spirits all day long…I still believe in them. Much like the toothfairy, easter bunny, or Santa Claus. Oh wait. They’re not real or are they? (shifts eyes side to side)

    http://www.trishacondo.com

    Oh Johnny boy…oh Johnny boy! (winks)

  68. Ohh… Beaker isn’t a narcissistic sociopath, he just isn’t. He’s just chronically startled. I’m pretty sure in his language, ‘Me, me, me’ means: ‘Not another explosion, please, ohgodno, not another one.’
    Doctor Bunson Honeydew, on the other hand…

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