It’s sort of a happy birthday to all of us.

I just found out that you can design your own leggings, so of course I was like, “You know what these pants need?  A motherfucking happy raccoon.”

AND GUESS WHAT?  I WAS TOTALLY RIGHT AND THEY ARE GLORIOUS.
“HELLO FROM PANTS.” ~ Rory
The hand placement is unfortunate. Or perfect. Depends on how you feel about being high-fived on the butt by an over excited raccoon.

The best part is that not only is an insane raccoon staring down people on the subway, but also his fur makes it look like you have luxuriously long leg hair with glitter stuck in it.  Like a werewolf who just came from a party.   The only thing better to put on leggings would be a really unflattering picture of your ex on them and then walked around their neighborhood like a mobile billboard they can’t untag themselves in.

Just a suggestion.

PS. Today is Victor’s birthday.  Happy birthday, sweetie.  I love you.  For your birthday I am not buying these tights.  For you, I mean.  I might buy some for me.  BECAUSE LOOK AT THEM, VICTOR.

PPS.  They’re in my shop (along with this pair as well) if you want a pair yourself because today all their clothes are 40% off.  If you’re not reading this when the sale is on, just wait until it is again because $60 for leggings seems insane.  Almost as insane as wearing a raccoon on your butt.

115 thoughts on “It’s sort of a happy birthday to all of us.

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  1. I never knew I needed a pair of leggings like this until this very second. If the house deal goes through and I have money to play with again soon, these will be mine!!

    Happy Birthday Victor!!!

  2. I think I say this every year but Victor and I share a birthday – Yay for September babies. Though it is the most frequent birthday of the year so maybe we are not so unique after all. (Hint: 9 months from New Years)

  3. If I weren’t a bloke – for whom leggings are inappropriate – I would be on Google images right now picking my style.

  4. Who wouldn’t want a Racoon High-5ing their ass?! It’s like a little 🖐 *smack, Atta-Girl everytime you wear them! 🦊

  5. Good lord, Rory’s mouth makes it look like she has a gaping wound in the side of her thigh! Just in time for Halloween?

  6. So could we make legging with JUST the raccoon legs and then a matching T with the upper body? Raccoon cosplay baby!!!! 😉

    Oh yeah, and Happy Birthday Victor. 🎂🎂🎂

  7. I was on the fence about them until I saw the hand placement. It brings it all together! His expression is saying “hey look where my hand is guys!”

  8. Jenny, this week I found your book (audio) and blog…BEST WEEK EVER! I do not think I have smiled/laughed so much in a long time. Starting on your first book (reading in reverse) today. Thanks for this and making me realize I am “normal”, you are amazing.
    Happy birthday Victor, I hope you don’t get taxidermy as a gift.
    PS – any grammatical errors are due to my cat sticking her butt in my face while typing!

  9. I love love love them both! Love the Happy Raccoon grabbing my butt! Love the cartwheeling happy raccoons! Love the long leg hair glitter look! Don’t love $60 but hey everything has a ying and yang right! These are amazing. I may have to make some with my pitbull Frankie on them!

  10. Holy Hell, according to the photo you’ve got to have a thigh gap to pull those off! Aw well, they are still awesome. Happy Birthday to Victor!

  11. What would be even better is wearing these with a long top or dress. Then it will look like a raccoon is reaching up your dress and that makes him insanely happy.

  12. Oh. My. Sweet. Jeebus. These leggings are everything! I need to lose enough weight so I can wear them without making Rory look like he’s having an allergic reaction to shellfish. This might just be the weight loss inspiration I needed.

  13. i was trying to just hide my great disappointment at the fact that BIG girls cannot order these ~ and then i read onemorefool’s reply. **** i love you both ****

  14. Well, I had no idea until now what costume I should wear for Halloween. Now I know I most likely need to be a werewolf who just came from a party! I’m thinking werewolf mask, tuxedo, and LOTS of confetti & glitter!

    Happy Birthday, Victor! For what it’s worth, I think the leggings would be lovely on you!

    Love to you both (and Hailey, of course!)

  15. Happy Birthday Victor!! Thanks for being the best thing ever for Jenny and Hailey. You are a saint and we love you so much!!!

    For anyone interested I created a Bloggess Tribe Map where you can add a pin and put your social media stuffs so we can connect better geographically.
    Map link: https://www.zeemaps.com/map?group=2714072#
    You can check out this tweet for instructions on adding a pin: https://twitter.com/HallieS86/status/913769853202452481

  16. OMG. these are so freaking hilarious. Epic, even. I may have to get a pair and scare the bejeezus out of everyone I come in contact with. And having a tiny (TINY…BWAHAHAHAAHAH) raccoon tagging my behind…icing on the cake!!! Love love love! Thank you for making me laugh my ass off this morning!!

  17. When I first read the title, I read ” it’s VIBRATORS birthday, and we’re celebrating by … Then I was like “say what? What is she celebrating?” Lol! It was so funny! They are great leggings though!

  18. I tend to wear skirts with my leggings, so leggings where the raccoon is on my calf would look better. Alas, I don’t think I have any raccoon fabric to make a raccoon skirt. Today I’m wearing a skirt with squirrel, mice, and acorns. Happy birthday to Victor.

  19. You should get them in miniature and put them on the real Rory, and then get leggings made with that design. Then you would be wearing leggings with a taxidermied raccoon wearing leggings featuring himself as a taxidermied raccoon–like looking into a funhouse mirror. Also, Happy Birthday to Victor!

  20. They make fabric markers. Has anyone tried coloring the clothing from You Are Here with them?
    Also, Happy Birthday to my fellow Libra, Victor. (My birthday was the 25th, so for once I have to be Team Victor.)

  21. Happy Birthday, Victor! Now you get to picture ALL the women wearing these! LOL! First time I’ve ever wished I could get away with leggings-I would own these in a heartbeat! Love!

  22. Oh man! Today’s my daughter’s birthday! Wish I could get her these. Hurricane Irma has us a little strapped. I love how the little paw reaches behind! LOL

  23. Jenny, I’d love to have these…(with a last name of COON I should), but the employment gods are against me and my cats insist on eating. Someday!

  24. 😂😂😂😂😂 Best. Leggings. Ever. And I find the hand placement hilarious. Will be getting. But not today, so I’ll have to wait till they go on sale again.

  25. This is the best thing ever. Period. Unless of course you find a company that makes a unitard version of this…

  26. I love that you keep creating ways for us to easily identify each other in public.

    I mean, those of us who go out in public, that is.

    Anyone wearing a Rory or Beyoncé item is a friend of mine!

  27. OMG! I’ve just spent the past 45 minutes playing with different artwork including old album covers to see what other designs I could make with this legging template. In particular I did the King Crimson album cover of “in the court of the crimson king”… disturbingly cool. Then I tried the Calvin & Hobbes “starry night” artwork… I could spend hours and hours playing with this template… but nothing as awesome as Rory of course!

  28. Jenny, you read my mind!!!

    Well, technically, I want to make a Cow Cow skirt with lots of Rory’s encircling the bottom of the skirt, side by side with their hands almost touching. So he could greet people in every direction. (Not the “bottom” bottom of the skirt. Like along the edge of your skirt that would be near your knees. Get your head out of the gutter, Jenny.)
    I’ve been meaning to ask if there is a PNG of Rory out there that I could do this with. Or would that be uncool, since Rory is yours? Don’t mean to cross any boundaries. I’ve just been feeling like I could use more Rory-style reminders that I’m okay when I forget that I’m okay.

    Happy birthday, Victor!!! <3 <3 <3

  29. I’m totally cool with a racoon high-fiving my butt, but I’m a tad concerned about how close his eye seems to be to the crotch area. Does he really want to look at that forever? Poor Rory. Happy birthday Victor!

  30. I heard the part where, father and daughter, you have a PAIR of Libras in your home. And I wonder no more at the Zen state of happiness and creativity you three enjoy.
    Happy Birthday to Victor!

  31. I found this a day late but my birthday is also the 29th so happy belated birthday to Victor and me. Also love these leggings so much!

  32. They look great! in a related topic, is there any chance you would make a pill case with the raccoon on it? Thanks!

  33. With the leggings and the get tough or die shirt I would be the weirdest and most badass person at my gym

  34. And here is a little present.

    Sent from my Windows Phone ________________________________

  35. I am so sad I missed the sale but will be watching for it to come around again! These are glorious! Happy Birthday Victor! Thanks for the awesome present!

  36. As awesome as those leggings are (HECK YEAH!), I’ll stick to buttery soft leggings from $12.50/pair from HicksInspired.com. Hopefully you can understand my cheapness 😉

  37. I looked these leggings up. Each pair are individually printed, cut and made to order at a Canadian company called Art of Where. Their website states everything is made in-house and they pay their staff a real wage. The reviews say they’re well-made and don’t get see-through.
    As an artist who has longed to get into printed wear without the human cruelty of fast fashion, this company thrills me.

  38. You need to make these leggings for us plus-sized people. I would so walk around with a raccoon or more on my ass!

  39. I needed to see these after seeing Las Vegas shooting and Tom Petty dying. I need to smile.

  40. I have started to blog! This was my inspiration! (not this post, but this blog!) i have only written two posts and they might be very shitty but gotta start somewhere.

    I can remember the part in the book where Jenny talks about working in HR and then becoming a writer…. kinda stuck with me.

    comment completely unrelated to the post.
    😐 😐 😐

  41. Random question… has anyone purchased a T-shirt from Zazzle? I’m trying to decide between the Women’s Bella+Canvas Relaxed Fit Jersey T-Shirt, Women’s Bella+Canvas Favorite Jersey T-Shirt, and the Women’s Basic T-Shirt.

    I find that unisex styles can be too loose and shapeless but some “women’s” styles often go overboard and are way too tight because they assume you have breasts and hips but a tiny waist and flat stomach.

    I want to get a “Feeling Stabby” or “Be Nice Or I Will Stab You” shirt. Because it’s just been one of those weeks.

  42. I cannot believe this service exists and I knew nothing about it! So. Many. Crazy. Legging. Ideas. Thanks, Jenny!

  43. I absolutely 100% need these to wear to work. I work at Barnes and Noble and I often push out dress code to the outer limits by using the “It’s book related” clause. These would make my managers head explode and it would be wonderful.

    But the price point puts them out of my range because, again, I work at Barnes and Noble lol

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