Remember a couple of years ago when I told you about this game my family invented called Crapscrabble?  If not, go read this and discover the best game in the entire world.

Recently Ferris Mewler discovered the bowl of tiles and decided to invent his own game of “Fish these tiles out of this bowl and fling them at your owner as hard as you possibly can and then pretend it wasn’t you when they get hit with tiny projectiles“.  And then Hunter S. Thomcat gets into it and furiously bats the tiles across the floor like he’s playing air hockey and Rolly is OCD about shit being on the floor so she picks the tiles up in her mouth and drops them in the toilet so now everytime I pee I’m getting secret coded messages from my toilet.  And then I yell, “THAT’S NOT HOW CRAPSCRABBLE WORKS YOU GUYS” but apparently it’s how Catscrabble works.

Ferris. What the hell.

So now I’ve started to play CatScrabble, which works the same as CrapScrabble but you can only play with the letters you find on the floor but it’s always consonants and no vowels so you can’t win, which is pretty much how it goes with cats.

PS. I just looked in the toilet and the letter “P” was at the bottom of the bowl and Rolly was staring at me like, “See what I did there?” and I think my cat and a toilet just partnered up to beat me in a word game.


69 thoughts on “Catscrabble

Read comments below or add one.

  1.         Umm. Forget Crapscrabble, why do you have a cabinet chock full of creepy dolls???   

    (The real question is ‘why don’t more people have cabinets chock full of creepy dolls?’ ~ Jenny)

  2. Of course Rolly put the P in the toilet. You weren’t recognizing the genius of playing CRAPscrabble in it.

  3. My aunt and uncle have cats. Every time we visit for a few days, we always lose a few socks. But I have a feeling the cats blame it on the dogs. It wouldn’t surprise me if their scrabble game is missing half of their tiles, which could explain why my aunt never suggests playing, even though she knows I like to play.

  4. Just read Amanda’s comment and went, “she must be new here.”

    Also, I went back and read the Crapscrabble article and now I want to start a Surrealist Poker tournament.

  5. Ahh… Amanda and Janette must be new here. I hadn’t read about Crapscrabble before, and the tagline about cats using a toilet to beat you made mt think of an entirely different game.

  6. All consonants and no vowels? No problem, just look up Welsh words! Welsh has plenty of words that don’t have vowels, such as ‘cwtch’, which means ‘hug’.

  7. My cat isn’t interested in board games, but loves to play, “OMG, You’re chasing me!” by darting in front of me when I walk. Usually this is when I’m carrying something that will spill. She’s an expert gamer.

  8.         I really want to know who the artist is for the painting of the woman with black straight hair. 

    (Sara Scribner. She’s amazing. ~ Jenny)

  9. I believe cats really are the absolute best at the “Please love me. Now I bite you and trip you and knock over all of your really super full water glasses.” It’s like having tiny, fuzzy bullies running the entire household. I say that with love, of course, because cats.

    They declared themselves to be my masters many moons ago.

  10. Our cat is more into “This-Is-Probably-Fragile-And-Noisy-So-Let-Me-Knock-It-Off-The-Desk-At-3-AM” which is SEVERELY obnoxious. Especially when he sees the stuff he knocked off on the floor the next morning & curls up on it to take a nap (true story) AFTER WAKING US UP REPEATEDLY THE NIGHT BEFORE. A game I’m willing to concede he won IF HE’D JUST STOP.

  11. I’d be miffed if a cat and toilet beat me at a word game but it’s hard to go past P at the bottom of a toilet bowl.
    Catscrabble sounds like fun for a wet weekend.

  12. You have really interactive cats! My cats won’t do a damned thing. They just look at me like I’ve lost my marbles when I hand them a new toy. “Seriously? You expect me to appreciate a toy when I can go outside and find a LIVE toy?” Teddy brings in live birds and Izzie brings in live mice. I rescue the birds but the mice I’m a little less interested in preserving.

  13. I love you. I love your cats. And I love seeing every fascinating thing you have in your house. And there’s always something new that I’ve never seen before. Thanks!

  14. I guess it’s a good thing it wasn’t Chinese Checkers. Can you imagine all the marbles everywhere? On the other hand, telling people you lost your marbles would take on a whole new meaning…

  15. I think Rolly was just trying to be sarcastic with the letter P in the toilet thing. I wonder where he gets that from? Hmmmm??? You and your cats are the highlight of my day! I love the picture of Ferris, like he’s yelling back at his cat mom saying “I’m just trying to have fun ma!”

  16. I love your cats! Pretty sure Ferris is just getting back at you for all the costumes you force him into. You dress him up, he tries to murder you with tiny squares of death !

  17. Sounds like a great game (and I loved the original Crapscrabble). Cats have their own little games. We had one that used to fling toothpicks as hard as she could across the room. We never knew why.

  18. Omg best post!!!! I love playing games with cats even though I lose every time. My kitten and I play catch or fetch and it’s always the highlight of my day

  19. Nope nope I’m with Amanda on this one, why in the name of nautical dictionaries would you keep your creepy dolls in the closet? Creepy dolls should be displayed in either a bookcase, dollhouse or on shelves. You can’t lock them up like that! Oxygen is limited in there! DO YOU WANT THEM TO GET ANGRY WITH YOU AND REBEL!?

  20. The reason they’re all vowels is because they are spelling cat words like, eeaaaaaaoooooo!

  21. OMG that is hilarious.

    We don’t have a bowl full of Scrabble tiles laying around but I did try to make a cute ‘wintery’ scene with some small wooden trees (like tiny model trees) and some Lincoln Logs one time, as a Christmas decoration. It was destroyed in less than 2 minutes because apparently, Lincoln Logs (especially the short, fat ones that I used for the corners of my log cabin) are the most awesome cat toy EVER.

  22. Have the Russians gotten to your cats? Not a lot of vowels in Russian words…maybe it’s time to have a serious talk with the cats about collusion.

  23. I wish my cat had the gumption to care about anything , really. But nope. I think her being a mute has caused her to have a real IDGAF personality so she definitely wouldn’t play Crapscrabble. Or Catscrabble. Or any Scrabble. Or anything really. She just doesn’t care about life.

  24. I am really sorry that I didn’t read the entry on Crapscrabble sooner because I could have been playing it for years. Ecxept my family might be better at it than me. Hmm.
    You have super smart cats. And cats that remember all those costumes you made them wear. I’d put away anything really breakable after Halliween.

  25. My older kid had troubles with sounding out the first letters of words in pre-school. Maybe if we had let him drop tiles in the toilet, which he was very good at. It’s all about the motivation for some.

  26. OMG. I do not know how I missed Crapscrabble the first time around, but now that table top is not in production you’ve got to invite Wil and Anne over to to play crap scrabble and make a video. PLEASE.

  27. I think a key point is being missed here. The toilet was obviously totally in on it. This means you have a sentient toilet that can communicate with cats and thinks about you every time you sit on it. Thinking, Jenny. And people have an issue with a cabinet full of creepy-ass dolls???

  28. Jenny i think @Nienna has come up with a new catchphrase for a Tshirt…just add layout:
    Creepy dolls to the left
    Possessed appliances to the right

    and please <<
    don’t step on the ethical taxidermy.”

  29. Whoah apparently I stumbled across a way to change formatting. That wasn’t intentional, just a couple of right-pointing arrows to imply pretty graphics on a Tshirt.

  30. Ferris: “You won’t let me open the doors, then you were upset about a little opened window, and now you’re on me about THIS?!”
    “Would you like to see this bowl of tiles on the floor, Mom?”

  31. Anytime you can get cats reading is time well spent. Now if you can teach them to pee in the toilet, and not just “P” in the toilet, you’re all set.

  32. Holy crap, cats with potty mouths are one thing. But, a toilet that can potentially conjugate a verb….. Your killing me here, Alice….

  33. I hereby fully admit to copying the original rules of CrapScrabble and saving it as a Word document on my computer. Now come the months of thrift store / ebay shopping for old Scrabble games. At some point I am going to play this with whatever family I have left by the time I’ve collected enough tiles to fill a goldfish bowl (note to self: get a goldfish bowl), and it’s all because of you, Jenny! Thanks for the great idea!!

  34. Horribly off topic, but is that a barrister’s? I’ve never seen one with split (or framed out) glass before (I’m not sure what type my great grandparents had, I have two globe-wernickes,and I’ve seen a few at estate sales, but all of those are just the standard open glass style). Looks to be a gorgeous bookcase/cabinet (though the creepy dolls are creepy)

  35. In other cat related games, we play “cat or trash” from our house when we try to work out whether that thing moving around at the end of the garden is a cat or just trash blowing in the wind.
    You can also play it driving down the road for bonus points – just make sure that the person keeping score is not driving.

  36. Uh. Might I suggest keeping the seat down. Maybe Rolly would put them in a more retrievable spot then?

  37.         Although I am fascinated by Catscrabble, I oculdn't help noticing your awesome collection of Blythe dolls!  Are they Blythe dolls?  I have always wanted one (being a doll collector), but couldn't figure out how to get one, nor did I have the funds for one.  One lovely summer day last year I scored an original!  At a country yard sale at the bottom of a box of dolls with a tattered Mrs Beasley doll laying on top, I found my dream doll.  She is one of the original dolls with a prairie/hippy dress on.  I keep her locked in a medicine cabinet with my vintage Skippers and Francies.  I am impressed with your weird doll collection! My job is literally 'making clothing for ghosts'...long related...and I have stitched my own weird dolls and stuffed them with earth and other odd things...One show I did was called 'Sweet Breath of Trees' and I created an entire layette set for babies who live underground (infants who died during pioneer times).  I lived in an old midwive's tin house surrounded by residue of pioneer times, including cemeteries in forests.  I would be happy to send you one of my earth dolls and assorted art catalogues as a gift if you are interested.  I have a new show opening at the Campbell House Museum in Toronto called 'Bluebird Dress Factory' that features forty taxidermied century old bluebirds on loan from the Royal Ontario Museum...and goldfinches and cardinals...and handmade dresses.  Thought you might like the taxidermy connection...     

    (They’re Blythe and Pullip dolls. 🙂 I so want to see your art. ~ Jenny)

  38. I had missed the earlier Crapscrabble post. I’m glad I read it!
    I come from a family of game players, but we are ridiculously “according to Hoyle” people. To the point that my parents actually own a “Book of Hoyle”. Exceptions are made when adding people to a game – like a card game that requires 4, but 7 want to play – or “Uncle Paul’s rules”. Uncle Paul was my great uncle who died when I was still too young to learn Pinochle, so I don’t understand his rules.

  39. I had my scrabble pieces in a beautiful yet simple glass bowl that reminded me of Arthur Dent’s fishbowl from the dolphins in So Long and Thanks for All the Fish. I did it after reading your original post and loved it. Then my late dictator of a cat knocked it off the table because he was a dick. I miss him. And my bowl. I still have the scrabble pieces but now they’re just in the box. 😝

  40. Hello!
    My name is Yelena. Engaged in the creation of cute and beautiful dolls Blythe (Blythe)
    I want to offer to your judgment these creatures pleasing the eye. All the details on my website

    Will arrive nicely and securely packed
    And one more important point – the doll is not for active children’s games !!! (Or rather, the purchase for children is at the discretion of the parents :). Yet more for aesthetics and for girls over :)))
    A heavy doll with its own eye mechanism and the ability to switch 4 pairs of eyes.
    Body hinged !!! All clothes in miniature 1/6 I sew exclusively by myself. Boots I sew by hand myself.
    Eyes glass with the effect of flicker, I also make myself.
    -Make carving (sawed nose, lips, cheeks, chin). Raised “look” made “sleeping eyelids.” Replacing eyelashes with realistic ones. Make is made by prof. Pastel, fixed by special means.
    Will arrive in the outfit that is presented on the doll.
    More photos on request. ((
    I never use photoshop for photo editing! However, the color of the product may differ slightly due to the difference in the color rendition of the monitor of your devices !!!

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