I just want someone to tell me I’m okay.

in If I was a dog I'd be dead by now, Random Crap

So a few weeks ago I found a lump in my neck.  I ignored it because that’s what I do but it’s gotten worse and now I can feel it when I swallow and when I breathe.  I wake up coughing and choking.  It doesn’t hurt.  It’s just really uncomfortable.  Like being lightly strangled by your imaginary friend.  And the anxiety of feeling unable to breathe makes my throat constrict, which makes it worse and that’s about the time I convince myself that my entire body is made of cancer.

It’s probably not though.

I saw my doctor and hoped she’d just say it was all in my head but turns out it’s all in my neck and she took so much blood that the tubes literally stopped filling up, which the nurse said was just a strange problem with the tubes but which I’m pretty sure is a sign that I’m now a solid.  Today I have an ultrasound to look at my neck growth and honestly I’m a little nervous and I’d like for someone to tell me that I’m going to be fine.

Chances are that it’s my thyroid becoming extremely enlarged, which makes sense because I also have Hashimoto’s Disease and that causes a lot of weird problems.  It happened once 15 years ago (on a much smaller scale) and I had to go through a lot of biopsies and ultrasounds before they were able to tell it wasn’t cancer.  The process was grueling but it all worked out so I’m crossing my fingers that this will all work out too, but even if it’s just an enlarged thyroid it’s a concern that it’s pressing on my windpipe so they may have to remove it, or part of it, I guess?  And that seems scary again.

So I guess what I’m asking is three things:

  1. Send me good thoughts if you have them to spare.
  2. Tell me I’m a hypochondriac and this is all very normal and that I’m being a grown-up by checking this out.
  3. Tell me if you’ve had your thyroid removed.  Was it terrible?

Sorry this isn’t a funny post.  I’m just super distracted and I can’t not think about it because breathing and swallowing are two of my favorite things and my neck is being a real dick about it.

784 thoughts on “I just want someone to tell me I’m okay.”

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I’m sending you lots of good thoughts and hope you’ll be ok soon 🙂
    You are being incredibly grown up and responsible and people should follow your example

    hugs

  2. I am thinking all of the good thoughts your way. I am so sorry that your health is so tenuous. You bring so much happiness to so many people, it just seems wrong that your life is such a struggle.

  4. The plus side of getting your thyroid removed is you take synthetic thyroid which means if you eat a whole lot of food you can just take extra and make it go away. The doctors say you shouldn’t do that, but why would you NOT? Anyway, I know a number of people on synthroid and it isn’t a big deal at all.

    Keep on keepin’ on!

  5.         My mom had half her thyroid removed almost 20years ago. Shes the healthiest person I know! I'm sure you'll be fine. If they do have to remove some of your thyroid maybe you can keep it in a jar?!

    (Ooh, thyroid in a jar! Honestly, that would be the silver lining in all of this. ~ Jenny)

  6. Good thoughts headed your way, and I congratulate you on being an adult and getting this checked out. My Mother had her thyroid removed in her forties and lived to be 96! I was going to say take a deep breath, sorry, but you are going to be JUST FINE.

  7. While it’s not normal, you are being very adult by having it checked out. I have responded to the tweet about this post with a pic of my nephew at his first Santa visit. Check it out and try to smile.

  9. I can’t promise that is all going to be ok, but I can remind you to breathe and that you are being very responsible by dealing with this. I’m sending you all the spare good vibes I have. Xoxo

  10. You are definitely doing the right thing by getting it checked out. And while I personally haven’t gone through this, I do know a couple people who have had surgery on their thyroids for various reasons, and they’re all doing just fine now. So you will totally be fine too. hugs

  12. Jenny, you’re going to be OKAY. <3

    Sending hugs and good vibes.

    You’re doing the right thing gsetting it checked out.

  15. I could distract you with my itchy boob rash thing I’ve got going on, which is scaly and weepy and stings and itches and frantically scratching your boob in public is kind of frowned upon. I hope your lump is nothing to worry about and I’m very glad that you adulted and got it checked out. I’m also adulting and getting itchy boob rash checked.

  16. Keeping you close as the labs come back. I have Hashimoto’s thyroiditis and had papillary thyroid cancer in 2001. I had two surgeries- one to remove my thyroid and a second to remove a rogue lymph node that radiation goofed up. I’m reminding you that I’m alive and well. You will be too. You are doing the right thing by having this investigated.

  18. Sending positive vibes and healing thoughts your way.
    You are a grown-up for checking it out. I have Hashimoto’s and have to keep up on bloodwork, ultrasounds, and meds. Good luck!
    Two of my friends had their thyroid removed and they are great: healthy, beautiful, and happy.

    Good luck, Jenny. Don’t lose your Jingle over this right now.

  19. A) You’re not a hypochondriac, and you’re being VERY grown-up getting this checked out. And B) sending all kinds of good vibes you’re way, it really sounds like it’s just going to be your thyroid and I’m sure they’ll be able to get you to where you can breathe/swallow again. Hang in there….

  21. I’ve had thyroid tumors and had to have a hyperthyroid tumor and gland removed. You are fine, aside from the discomfort, fear, and anxiety that these things bring. If it makes you feel any better, sounds like you’re still walking. When mine was growing I started walking into walls and looking drunk at work, which is always super awesome. As you know, what doesn’t kill us is either making us stronger, postponing the inevitable, or both.

  23. You are not a hypocondriac and you are being a grown up and practicing good self care by getting it checked out. I’m proud of you for getting some doctors involved. I’ll pray for your speedy healing and a good outcome.

  24. You are doing the best thing you could possibly be doing by getting this checked out. Seems like chances are very good it will be just like last time.

    Tell your neck to stop being a dick, and see if having one of the cats draped around it (I’m sure they love to do that) makes you feel any better.

  25. I have not had my thyroid removed, but my MIL has, and, while finding your right levels for replacements can be fiddly, it’s something the Medical Establishment knows how to do. She’s been living thyroid free since the day before I got engaged to my husband. Decades. (And that means decades of learning by Medical types, too. They’ll be smarter with you if this is what it comes to. And she turned out fine even though she had this done at the close of the Iron Age.)

  28. Yes, you are being a grown-up by checking this out. (As I’ve been finding out as I age, individual body parts now demand special attention, which is fine.) Yes, I’ve had friends- cats, even!- who’ve had thyroid removed, no biggie.Yes, good thoughts, but no matter what they tell you, you know your body best; you’ll work it out.

  29. A BFF had hers removed and she said it was just one more piece of shit in her body that she didn’t need anyway. Let it go! Let’s all sing together…”Let it go Let it go you don’t need that thyroid anymore, Let it go let it go…” Throwing lots of good vibes your way Sista Sledge!

  30. Sending you good thoughts <3 that sounds uncomfortable. The good news is you’ve (kind of?) had this before, so hopefully it’s nothing.

  31. You’re not going to be fine, you’re going to be FABULOUS! My thyroid lump earlier this year turned out to be just a cyst. And you are also being a responsible and mature grown-up human by going to the doctor to check this out rather than doing the dance of denial. All my best wishes to you!!

  32. You are going to be okay. Yes, you are a hypochondriac. Yes, it is also very scary. But you are going to be okay – you are tough as nails and this is just one of those freaky body things that happen to us all. hugs

  33. That does sound a bit scary. Very good (and brave!) though for getting it checked out. I’m going to send some love and will keep my fingers crossed it’s all going to be just fine. Good luck with breathing for now..

  35. Sending loads of good thoughts your way Jenny. I too have Hashimoto’s. Hate it especially since I didn’t choose to have. And I know personally one person who had their thyroid remove due to Hyperthyroid. He’s doing well. No problems at all. Again lots of good thought headed your way.

  36. My wife has Hashimoto’s too and has a similar neck lump. Her endocrinologist says she’s okay, so you’re going to be okay too, by extension. (But it’s good and grown-up of you that you’re getting it all checked out instead of relying on my analogous logic)

  37. Someone once told me “Knowledge is power”. You are arming yourself with knowledge by getting tests done. You are brave. You can do hard things.

  40. Sending love and good thoughts your way! You’re doing all the right things in having this checked out, and I’ve got my fingers crossed for you (figuratively; I’m typing right now).

  41. My sister went through this and she was able to get her thyroid meds adjusted and the lump shrank and went away. Very common with the Hashimoto’s crowd, from what I understand. All good vibes comin’ right atcha, lady.

  42. You are going to be ok, because no matter what it is (enlarged thyroid or alien mosquito bite that will give you superpowers) you are kickass and will persevere. We love you and you are being an adult by checking this out.

  44. It will be OK! You are being very adult by going to get it checked out! We love you! And, breathe. I know it’s hard right now but you will have answers soon. 🙏

  45. You may be a hypochondriac, but you are also being a grown-up to get it checked out, so good for you! Fingers crossed all the way that the results are the best they could possibly be.

  47. HI Jenny,
    I am sure you will be fine. You are in good hands. It is good to hear they are taking your concerns seriously

    As for thyroid removal, my mother had her thyroid removed due to an injury before I was born. At this point she has lived without it longer than she had it. The only downsides seem to be the need to take a pill, and being cold when she forgets it.

  48. You are totally being smart to check this out right away. Yes, it’s most likely related to your existing stuff (in which case it’s good to know anyway) but it’s also smart and grown-up to go in to a doctor right away to get it checked in case it isn’t.

  49. I have not had my thyroid removed but my best friend has hers removed when we were 21 and we are 38 now and she is great. Her thyroid was paralyzing her vocal cords which was pretty werid but is now a great story. Her scar is very faint now but it looked like someone tried to slit her throat and I know you can use that look to make a lot of awesome jokes. Sending positive vibes.

  50. …Did I ghostwrite this post? Because you’re feeling exactly what I feel about every mystery lump and mystery pain. You are totally doing A+ adulting by having it checked out! And if you’ve had a similar thing before, the chances that it’s a recurrence of the old thing are SO much greater than the chances that it’s a whole new and more dangerous thing. Which I never quite believe either, but it’s still true.

    I will rub my dogs’ tummies for you, as this is known to output luck and good vibes into the universe.

  51. You are going to be okay. I imagine it is scary and difficult and no one who knows anything is telling you that it is nothing, but it’s going to be okay.

  52. I didn’t have mine removed, but I know people who did, and they’re absolutely fine without it, just take more levothyroxine than they used to. As for me, I have Hashimoto’s, and when I forget my meds I have trouble breathing too, everything just swells shut, so I know it’s scary and scary and scary. You’ll be okay though. Because you’re The Bloggess and we love you so much, the universe would be messing with a LOT of us if it decided to fuck with you. Because we’d fuck it right back. With a broken bottle or a plunger. Or something. You get the idea.

  53. Jenny, that sounds awful! I had an extremely enlarged thyroid with multiple nodules. I had it removed about 6 years ago. The surgery was not bad at all. Overnight stay in the hospital to monitor calcium levels. Some pretty nasty neck pain and an allergic reaction to the steri-strips holding my neck together notwithstanding. Saying a prayer that all is well and it’s no big deal!!

  54. You’ll be fine. My wife, several years ago, had problems with her throat. She could hardly swallow either drinks or food and was positive she was dying. Our car was off the road for a while then so, at 10pm, her, our 2 kids then aged 6 & 8, walked the 2 miles to the energency room to have her condition confirmed as terminal ( or so she thought.) Strep throat! I told her it was that but as she’d never had it before she was convinced she needed to make a will and prepare the kids for Mommy’s departure. Needless to say the walk home was filled with comments from yours truly. You’ll be fine.

  55. I had half of my thyroid removed. It was no problem. I didn’t even stay in the hospital overnight. It was just over a year ago and for a while I told people it was a dueling scar, but now it’s not even noticeable.

    You will be fine.

  57. I am here to remind you of Occam’s razor: the simplest explanation is correct. It’s the known thyroid issue flaring up. It’s not fair, at all, but it’s manageable. It’s a chore. Do not be afraid. Be annoyed.

  58. Sorry your neck is being such a jerk! You can’t really fix something unless you look at it first so good for you for fixing things!! My mom has her thyroid removed and she said it wasn’t bad at all. Thyroids can be real assholes.

  59. You’re a hypochondriac! Like me!! 🙂 I bet it’s just a lymph node gone rogue and that it’ll settle down soon. Maybe you’re being too busy lately? Maybe slooowwwwww downnnnnnn? 🙂 <3

  62. You’re more than okay, Jenny. You’re also wiser than I am, because I waited so long to get that root canal yesterday that they’re probably going to write papers about me. “The pH is 2 which is actually quite impressive.” And oh, the smell. This thing has to be killed in two sessions. I guess that’s why I’ve had a headache every day for the past few weeks. I’m from the old redneck school of waiting for things to go away. Sometimes that just doesn’t work. I’m sending you all the good wishes I’ve got, and I’m not known for that, so there you go.

  63. Sending you light and happiness! My sister had to have her thyroid removed and it really was fine. She got this cool scar across her throat that made her look like she had a run in with an axe murderer but she was so badass she triumphed over him and all she walked away with with a mark on her neck.

  64. I’m very much also a hypochondriac. It will absolutely be fine, hon, I have zero doubt. I’m sure it’s just a thyroid issue! Sending you sooo much love and positive energy! ❤💕❤💕❤💕❤💕❤💕❤

  66. Good job adulting and getting the lump checked out! Definitely the best plan, especially with a history of thyroid issues. It WILL be okay! Sending lots of positive thoughts to you!

  67. So, I was semi excited when I checked into the chiropractor this morning and the name above me was Jenny Lawson. I told the receptionist, that’s my favorite blogger, but she is in Texas, so, probably not her. But then I noticed the only other person in the waiting room was a guy. And when they called him, I thin they called Denny. So either he writes his D’s weird, or I miss heard, or I misread. It was really early, and solstice and all. I’m losing it. Anyway, I almost sort of not met you today. I never had thyroid issues that I know of, but I hope you get answers and try not to worry, and of course heal up quickly.

  68. My sister in law had her thyroid removed a couple years ago and was so relieved immediately after the surgery. It helped right away with her depression and fatigue. I know it’s scary to contemplate losing a body part (even when it’s gently trying to murder you), much less take on another medication, but you are totally being an adult non-hypochondriac about it and you will be fine.

  70. You realize the scary part is right now, right? The not knowing is the scary part. Once you know you can plan, you can fix, and your brain isn’t telling you that you have neck Ebola. Or that the twin you absorbed is growing back so it can sneak out and slaughter your neighbors. No matter the diagnosis, it can be treated and handled. You have a wonderful supportive real life family and friends. You have thousands of us. Whatever the body malfunction all of us will be here for you. We cross time zones. One of the tribe is always awake.
    Your family and friends are there for you. We are there for you. In a noncreepy stalker way of course.
    You got this. You are strong and capable. And even when you don’t think you are those that surround you believe in you.

  72. I’ve had mine removed and it absolutely wasn’t terrible. Most hospitals do it laparoscopically now, and you can’t even see my scar (do NOT Google thyroid scars. I swear they’re just out there to scare you.) I had to spend one night in the hospital and was back to work in just a few days, and there was no pain at all. The only annoyance is having to take thyroid pills for the rest of my life, and it takes a while to get you to the right levels, but that’s a minor inconvenience at best. Let the possibility of this be the least of your worries! Sending you good thoughts and much love.

  74. Sending you virtual hugs! This will all work out and soon you’ll be able to breathe again. Love to you while going through the agonizing waiting part, and forever after.

  75. I have a good feeling that everything will be fine (and it was a funny post. Your sense of humor is a real trooper!)

  76. Good for you for having it checked out. (Personally, I have a tendency to ignore these things or refuse to see a medical professional, so you are way ahead of me.) Sending you positive thoughts and am hoping it turns out to be something simple and benign that you can laugh about later. Also sending you wishes for a very happy holiday season (despite this worry, and the discomfort of it). You have a lovely family, including your extremely affectionate fur babies, and I hope you have light and love through Christmas and into the New Year.

  77. You are being a very good grown up by having it checked out and I’m very proud of you. All the good thoughts and fingers crossed and everything else.

  78. I had my thyroid removed (irradiated) about 15 years ago. It was no big deal! And I got to be radioactive for several days! (I couldn’t cuddle my pets or baby or sleep with my husband, but I did get to declare that I was radioactive which was fun.)

  79. You’ve got this. You’ll be fine. The body is a weird thing. I’ve had skin cancer and now I go into the dermatologist every six months prepared to hear I’m about to die because I found a new thing, and instead I hear “Oh that’s just sun damage” or “a skin tag, nothing to worry about.”

    Sending you thoughts of tranquility and strength,.

  81. My sister had her entire thyroid removed, one lobe at a time a few years apart, and she lives a perfectly normal life. She is a few years older than you and she only has to take the thyroid hormone replacement meds everyday, which she was doing before the removal anyway. She said the surgery was a little scary (sorry!) but all surgery can be a little scary and my sister is a chicken. You’ll be okay. It isn’t a huge deal and life afterward is completely manageable.

  82. Positive thoughts heading your way! Bodies are weird. Let’s hope it’s just a case of something weird that goes away. And stay off WebMD because that is bad for all symptoms. Feel better Jenny!

  83. Good Morning Jenn.

    May this be a blip you can push out of the way and resume. May the medical care you receive be top-notch or at the very least be among the American Top 40. You truly cannot mess around with your health, My Dad ignored something that could have easily been treated and it cost him his life. Never second-guess something if you cannot first-guess it in the first place.

    @WriterDann

  84. I had my whole thyroid removed 11 and a half years ago…it’s sucky, but not terrible. No big bad aftereffects. You will be ok no matter what…we promise! All the hugs!

  88. It’s going to be okay. Chronic illness has a way of f’ing with your mind. Some symptoms can be harmless, indicating nothing wrong, but others are a signal for further investigation and treatment. When you have so many weird symptoms, it’s hard to separate them out, and they snowball you into a mass of pain and anxiety. I have had disturbing throat stuff; turned out to be an esophageal motility issue where I would choke on things like water, and air, and spew everything out on unsuspecting family members. The choking sensation was the worst. I hear you on that. You have great doctors, and they are on top of this. It’s goung to be okay. ❤️

  89. I have Hashimoto’s and an enlarged thyroid. Everything is going to be ok.

    Also… I was told by my doctor that if you are going to get a cancer, Thyroid is the best. Which is weird to type. Because they just take it out and you take more synthroid and then badda bing, you keep going.

    And since I too am a hypochondriac, I like to calm myself by saying that the cancer I feel sure I’m going to get will absolutely be thyroid which is the best. Which also pleases my competitive, perfectionist side.

  90. I am very proud of you for having it checked out! Sending you warm and fuzzy thoughts. We are here for you.

  91. I had a panic attack about my annual checkup this week. Some tests were ordered to monitor an ongoing, and at last check benign, condition. We are being grown ups by getting these things checked, but the waiting on tests is THE WORST! You’re in my prayers for a happy resolution to this latest example of how our bodies keep us on our toes.

  92. Look, if everything else that’s happened to you hasn’t killed you yet, this probably won’t either! 😜

    We love you, Jenny. I’m glad you did the grownup thing and got it checked out.

  93. I had my thyroid removed 30 years ago (had thyroid cancer as a teenager). Surgery plus radiation (in the form of drinking radioactive iodine), and it’s never come back. The surgery was fine. Been taking thyroid hormone pill every day since. I’ve been told it’s the best cancer you can get – I mean, if you had to get cancer, this is the one you’d pick. Mine also started out as lumps in my neck (it had spread to my lymph nodes). You will be ok.

  94. Oh sweetie you are such a grownup!! All will be well and you may even end up with an interesting scar on your neck, if you are in to that sort of thing, ( if not, please forget I mentioned it). Peace to you Jenny, you are a light! Much love and good vibes!

  95. You’re going to be fine; there will be some Christmas, New Year and Spring miracles specially put aside for you. You will get some new stories, perhaps a new toy in a jar, and go out and buy something really bizarre (like a crocheted construction crane) to celebrate. The world will be enriched, we will be grateful. Big hug. x

  96. I’m sending you good thoughts.
    You are doing the right thing by getting it checked out.
    I’ve never had my thyroid removed, but I did leave a good portion of one of my ass cheeks on a driveway when I was in 4th grade. This was thanks to wearing shorts in the 90s, a “sit-N-skate”, a steep hill, and a friend who wouldn’t get out of the way.

    And that turned out okay. My wife even says the hair is even on both sides. 🙂

  97. You sound so much like me here that I felt compelled to write. I often think my health related anxiety and fear of death is unique. Most people with anxiety run to the doctor at any sign of sickness to get reassurance. I avoid doctors at all costs convinced they are there for nothing but to give me bad news. Instead of doctors, I ask my family and friends for reassurance. And most times when I ask for reassurance like this people respond by telling me to go to the doctor. Or they say unhelpful things like “you’re probably okay” or they tell you about friends who did have something terribly erong. There are so many things in the world that make the fear so much worse. And most often the things that make it really bad are internal. I get stuck in the magical thinking. Thoughts like if you see a commercial about cancer while you are suffering these symptoms that is further proof that you are dying. Do you ever feel that way??

    Anyways, I wanted to tell you what I always need to hear when I thought spiral about my impending death. You are going to be okay no matter what. You are going to get through this no matter what. You are strong enough to face anything and although this is likely nothing more than your fear making you more afraid, no matter the outcome you will not only survive, but come out the other side of this fear stronger than you were before. And most importantly….you are not alone.

    I hope you get answers quickly because the waiting truly is the worst.

  98. Dearest Jenny – my heart goes out to you as I have the same fear – that my body is riddled with cancer and any new thing has to be a form of cancer. It is a dreadful fear I was so embarrassed to mention to any doctor. However, just about 18 months ago, I did come clean. My doctors have been wonderful and have agreed to tests etc to ease my mind. I think you are VERY BRAVE and VERY SENSIBLE to investigate this issue. A real grown-up in my estimation! My love and good thoughts are winging your way. Be as strong as you can while this all plays out. Just remember, you are surrounded by people who love you. It’s okay to be scared, just don’t let the scary demons take you over – we’ll all protect you.

  99. Jenny I know exactly how you are feeling, I am always reverting to the ‘oh my god I have cancer that’s spread throughout my body’ scenario. Like you said you just want someone to tell you it’s alright. It sounds to me like it’s something to do with your Hashimotos and I’m sure it will go as quickly as it came. You will be alright 😘

  101. From one hypochondriac to another: if it happened before and you came out fine, you should be fine again. And as a fellow hypochondriac, I’ve already come up with a few non-thyroid, non-cancer, fully treatable options if you’re interested.

  104. I’ve had my thyroid removed. It wasn’t that bad but these things are scary. And I got to run around the grocery store scaring people because it looked I had been to a botched beheading. And now you can’t even see the scar. You can do this. It will be okay. 🍀💚🍀💚🍀

  105. A friend of mine just had her thyroid removed, and turns out it is cancer, but her prognosis is very good. The bright side is that the surgery was not awful, and she felt almost immediate relief from the annoying cough, hoarseness, difficulty breathing she had when her thyroid was in there. I hope this all goes as painlessly and worry-free as possible for you, Jenny. Sending love from an adoring fan, also with Hashimoto’s (well controlled so far, knock wood).

  106. You are definitely being an awesome grown up to get this checked out and you are incredibly brave to be vulnerable enough to share your fears with all of us. You inspire me in so many ways and near the top of the list is reaching out for support when you need it. Sending you all the good thoughts and feelings! All the best to you!

  108. My dad had throat cancer, and has been cancer free for almost 10 years and is in great shape. Sending you well wishes for whatever it turns out to be.

  109. My mom had her thyroid removed decades ago. She’s 91 now. Sending love and strength to you. xo

  110. Thyroid issues are the goddamn worst!! I’m hypothyroid myself. Screws with your whole body. Stay strong I’m sure you’ll be ok!!

  111. From one hypochondriac to another, I am sending you a gentle (but fierce) hug. You’re going to be okay 💜💜💜

  112. You’re doing so well at adulting, Jenny! Go you! Mel Jouwan, of Well Fed paleo cookbooks fame, has had to have her thyroid removed, and wrote about it on her blog several times. https://meljoulwan.com/ is her URL, and maybe there is comforting info there? I can tell you that she’s thriving and happy and healthy from all that she posts on her blog and instagram and all the cookbooks she continues to publish.

    Sending you so many holiday scented and comforting hugs! You’re going to be fine. xo

  113. I’m sending you all the good thoughts, and I’m confident you’ll be fine. Yay to you for being a grownup and involving professionals who can ensure that you remain fine. Also, a friend of mine with Hashimoto’s had her thyroid removed (it was the size of a large lemon and very fond of trying to strangle her), and it was an easy surgery and easy recovery, and the only downside was she didn’t get a big scar so she couldn’t lie and say someone tried to slit her throat.

  116. It’s okay honey!! Even if it’s cancer, thyroid is the best cancer. I had it twenty-five years ago and my doctor and I are growing old together.

  117. Sending good thoughts your way; you’ll get through this. I had my thyroid removed in 1994, and the worst part about it was – you’re not going to like this – it really hurt to laugh for a few days. I had a few friends who visited me in the hospital who I had to send home because they were making me laugh so hard. Anyway, it’s been almost 25 years since I had my thyroid removed because of cancer, and other than the need to take thyroid hormone, the only lasting effect is the extra “smile” I have on my neck from the small surgical scar. Facing surgery is never easy, but bottom line, having my thyroid removed was not terrible.

  118. You are going to be ok. It’s most likely just the same kind of thing as before, and if they have to remove part of it, you’ll do fine. And you are being incredibly responsible and grown up handling this. GO YOU. Much love, much appreciation. (I have a bunch of asshole med issues too. Total drag, but just part of life for us not-put-together-quite-normally types. <3 )

  119. Thinking of you, Jenny. I’m sorry you have to sit through an anxious wait like this. We’ll all sit through it with you.

  120. You’ll be okay, you really will. You’ll get checked, you’ll find out what the deal is, and proceed from there. I’ve known two women who gave their thyroid back to the universe and they did (and continue to do) absolutely fine. Good thoughts, best thoughts, and love!

  122. I had a reoccurring cyst in my thyroid when I was young, 13 I think. Anyway, the doctor would drain it by sticking a really big needle in it – they’d tell me not to swallow because that would make the needle jump around and be a bad thing. I would try to get all my swallowing out of the way, the nurse would hold my head, the doctor would jab me and then push on the cyst. They did this regularly until I was 16 and then decided to take out my thyroid. I was glad to not have to do the needle thing. So very glad! It was painful for a couple weeks, I couldn’t turn my neck very well because it would pull on my stitches. I have a really neat scar along the base of my throat. It’s faded and slightly ropy but not that noticeable. When I was younger, in my 20’s, I would get asked about it. Depending on the person I would either explain about my boring thyroid or tell them I was in a bar fight and the other guy had a knife.
    I am sending good thoughts and hope it all turns out well.

  123. I am a thyroid cancer survivor… and you got this!!! It’s a walk in the park compared to what you have already been through in life!!

    I got a lump after my first baby… Dr said I was too young for cancer at 22, and did no tests… got a new dress a few years later and had surgery 2 months later. 9 large tumors, 2 surgeries and one radiation treatment later and I’m good to go!!

    You got this.

  124. You’re going to be fine. Anxiety and weird body stuff are the worst combination. I had bumps on my wrists the other day and a knot in my neck. I convinced myself that I had malignant skin cancer that had spread to my lymph nodes. I went over to my friend who is an ER doc to see if I could celebrate Christmas before having to go to a dermatologist and inevitably tell my family I had stage 4 cancer. It was heat rash. Good job getting it checked out. Very very adult. Much better than Dr. Google.

  127. It’s important [very adult—the adultiest] you listen to your body and went to the doctor. Sets a great example for Hailey and your readers. 🍪🏅

    You’ll be ok—whatever the results. If they have to remove the thyroid? Ok—sounds like yours is a giant asshole anyways.

    I mean—not suggesting you have a sphincter on your neck or anything—just saying your —never mind.

    Happy thoughts.

  128. I can maybe assuage your mind a little here:
    1- It might be a cyst. I get those a LOT and they’re not cancerous 99% of the time. I have one on my thyroid right now and it’s fine and not going anywhere.
    2- Thyroid cancer is very rare. BUT, it is also very treatable.
    3- If they have to kill your thyroid, you’ll be ok there too. My brother had to have his zapped when he was in high school. (Thyroid problems run in the family, I have them too). It’s been SO much easier for him to control his thyroid since it was killed dead than when it was zooming back and forth all over the place, he’s happy it’s gone.
    4- You are adulting really well and it is totally and completely OK to be scared. And you don’t have to be funny for us. Whatever happens, we’re all friends here and we’ll be there for you no matter what happens.
    5- If you do have to have surgery, you’ll have a small but really cool scar and you get to make up really interesting stories about it and/or blame Victor for it. Bonus.

  129. My wife lost half her thyroid to Hashimoto’s when still in her twenties and the rest of it to cancer many years later. The cancer diagnosis happened at the biopsy of the thyroid remnant, and wasn’t particularly suspected, though I don’t remember the particulars of why it needed to be removed. (probably started swelling) In any case, when the remnant was removed, the standard procedure was to treat it as cancer and take the nearest lymph nodes as well, so when the diagnosis came, the surgery was already taken care of. The general attitude of her and her health providers has been that if you’re going to have cancer, thyroid cancer is the kind to have. Not to say that it’s not scary as hell, but…

    The most difficult part of all this has been regulating her thyroid hormone, as no combination of standard dosage pills works perfectly, but she has learned over the years how to interpret the blood test results and her own feeling to regulate her dosage fairly well.

    It wish the best for you, and if you like, will get you in touch with her.

  131. I have Hashi’s too. My thyroid will blow up to enormous proportions on occasion. Dr adjusts my meds and all is well. Sending you good vibes and a hug.

  132. Sending you lots of good positive energy (and feel good purrs from Paul Cat).

  134. You are a fierce healing machine! Sending you lots of love and smooth sailing towards an easy resolution .

  135. I had one swollen tonsil a few years ago. I was on a ton of meds for my ulcerative colitis, and some med made it swell up. My doctor had me go to an ENT to get another opinion, and I was freaked out. It ended up being nothing, and yours will be too, because you’re a hypochondiac, Jenny, and you’re also the best kind of person. I do highly suggest naming your thyroid, as that was great comic relief for me when my husband and I cracked on Thomas, the trepidacious two-timing Tonsil. 🙂

  137. I had a weird, not painful neck lump a few years ago. I couldnt turn my head, take a deep breath, and I started to look a bit weird to my coworkers. My doctor’s eyes bugged out when he saw it and got me to an ENT in a week. I was scared shitless. Turns out it was a lymph node that had just stopped draining.

  138. Mine was enlarged from Graves’ disease (hyperthyroid) and I took anti-thyroid meds then 1 radiation pill finished it off. No surgery. Lifelong synthroid! Good luck! Not all lumps are cancers!

  140. I’ve had my thyroid removed. It was huge and pushing on my windpipe as well. It was the size of a football when they finally took care of it. The scariest part was the surgery. It’s always scary giving up control and in that situation, you have none. The recovery was ok. I had a really great vivid scar for about a year. Every time someone tried to mess with me at work, I just told them to look at my neck. When they did, I’d say “See this? Bar fight. Keep going.” It was great. But then it faded. Can’t even tell now. Anyway, this might be a good thing for you. If it is the thyroid acting up, removing it and going on replacement therapy should help other things wrong with you. The thyroid affects so much. Just be really, really, proactive about making sure they check your hormone levels afterwards. I’m not normal at what they consider normal thyroid levels. Took me a long time to get them to understand that.

  141. I had my thyroid removed in an outpatient surgery several years ago. It was a quick, painless surgery and now I take a daily dose of synthroid that occasionally has to be adjusted for the correct levels. Sending love and good thoughts.

  142. Your concerns are valid & i’m SO glad you went to the doctor. Things like this are always scary – benign or not! But the fact remains, that in order to take care of your family, you must take care of yourself. and you are doing that. In more ways than one.

    I am saying Mi Sheberach prayers for you (so you got the Jews on your side as well)! I will also pray for you to get larger shoulders to carry whatever burden comes your way in life.

    My mom had part of her thyroid removed & later almost all her parathyroids. (I didn’t even know those existed). None of it was a big deal, except regulating her calcium. but of course, surgery is a big deal, to the person having it done. But if it is making it difficult to breathe, & the dr says to, have the surgery. Know that you have millions of friends that are holding your hand in their hearts, while we stay away, hiding from world, swallowing our own stress, depression, whatever. We do this willingly, because we all adore you AND it helps to take our minds off ourselves at the same time.

    Recovery is not bad at all. Just don’t eat rice krispies just after surgery. i still feel guilty about giving that to my mom. she accidentally broke a stitch or 2 & they went right back into surgery & fixed it in about 20 min. i admit it. i was a complete idiot while trying to take care of my mom…..

    You’ve got this!

  143. Sending all the good thoughts I have your way. If you do have to have your thyroid removed, make sure your surgeon is a reasonably weird individual who thinks like us. Before I had a complete hysterectomy in 2003 I told my doctor I wanted to see my uterus, since I’d had a 40+ year long, contentious relationship with the damn thing and I wanted it to know I’d won. She wouldn’t do it, mumbling something about “hospital rules” and “pathology”. I even brought her a camera to at least take a picture, but somehow that didn’t happen either. She thought I was weird, but I still maintain it was MY uterus and I had every right to take it home with me if I wanted it. I hope you don’t have to have surgery, but if you do–STAND YOUR GROUND. It’s YOUR thyroid. Threaten them with a charge of theft of organ if they won’t cooperate. Here’s hoping you have a healthy and happy 2019!

  144. When I was 6 years old I had a really really bad case of the mumps. I couldn’t go to school or even see any other kids and pretty much I sat in front of a powered off TV and stared at my freakishly swollen neck reflected in the screen. My mom felt so sorry for me she kept leaving the room so I didn’t see her cry. So finally she decided my oldest sister (who lived with my Dad–long story) could come over and play with me to take my mind off it, because she had already had the mumps. She came in with a stack of board games, sat in the floor across from me, and exclaimed, “God your jaws are fat!” So I guess the moral of this story is, at least my sister isn’t coming over to cheer you up? I don’t know. But you have done everything you can by calling the doctor, which means figuring out what to do about this is no longer on your to-do list. Check it off, move on. You’re strong and brave and fabulous. Nothing can take you down!

  145. Did you know that in cats they are injected with radioactive iodine to kill the thyroid? For 6 months afterwards, you have to store their used cat litter in the garage because it’s too radioactive for landfills.

    I think surgical removal is probably better. I know people who have had their thyroid removed and are completely healthy and lead normal lives.

  146. I had mine removed 25 years ago due to thyroid cancer, and I was pregnant at the time! All went well and my baby is twenty five and the light of my life. Let your doctors be there for you. You’ll be ok. xoxo

  147. I had a lump on mt thyroid too! It was a nodule full of fluid. The doctor drained it several times (uncomfortable but not painful) until I finally had it removed. Recovery wasn’t bad really. Cool scar.

  148. I had half my thyroid removed. IT was not a big deal. Granted, I’m a breast cancer survivor, but still. My endocrinologist was great and I felt so good I didn’t even spend the night in the hospital after the surgery. And the eurgeon depended the scar into the lines on my neck. So, don’t worry…you’ll be okay.

  150. Sending all the good vibes I can spare! Every lumpy thing I’ve ever had has fortunately been benign, resolved itself, or is still there but I’ve given up worrying about it cause it hasn’t killed me yet. Hoping the same for you.

  151. You have always been such a source of light and laughter and self compassion – Sending all the juju your way today!

  152. whenever I’m stressed about something, I sing Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds”.: Don’t worry ‘bout a thing, cuz every little thing is gonna be alright. If you can listen to the song, that helps too. Sending lots of love, light, & healing vibes to you. This is my message to you—ooo—ooo ❤️

  153. I have Hashimoto’s too and went through pretty much exactly this a few years ago! Big lump suddenly bigger and terror that it was cancer. It all turned out fine; I was told chances of cancer were very low but was still scared. I had to have a thyroid uptake scan, and the technician was quirky and funny and kinda hot; he flirted with me during the boring part of the process where I had to lie still and look at the ceiling, and it made the nervousness melt away. (I am not a person who gets flirted with, so this was novel). 😀

    I still have my thyroid, but I know two people who’ve had it removed, and no, it was not terrible and they’e doing just fine. <3 You will too, whatever way it goes! You will be fine. In fact, as you already know, thyroid problems can cause all kinds of symptoms, so maybe at the end of this process, you’ll have a solution to some of them and you’ll feel better! I know I did– it was near-miraculous once I got on the right balance of meds. I wish the same for you. Sending love and healing energy. <3<3<3

  154. Jenny, I’m praying for you. But here’s a little something similar for you. Early last summer I found a breast lump, which I thought was a gland, and promptly ‘forgot’ about it, because lumps come and go – and, I’m paranoid, and have this stupid notion that if I ignore it, it’ll go away. Late August I discovered that is got huge, and was prepared for the worst before I even called the doctor. It turned out to be some weird thing I can’t pronounce, and had to copy & paste for you to see the name – Pseudoangiomatous stromal hyperplasia. A rare overgrowth of cells. In essence, I’m a unicorn, because I have other rare things, like cornea dystrophy and bradydactyly of a type the genetics people can’t identify. Everything will be okay. We love you and we all have you in our thoughts.

  155. You are doing the adult thing. I’m going through a scary med problem now too, but here’s the positive energy I can spare today…➕ ➕ ➕ ➕ ❎ 2 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  156. Ok, so my friend had her thyroid removed but before they did, they gave her radiation pulls that made her GLOW IN THE DARK. I mean, that just sounds like you all over.
    After she had it removed (seriously, NBD) she was left with a scar on her neck that looks like somebody tried to slit her throat and now she tells people that it was from a bar fight and you should see the other guy. (Um, also sounds like you!)
    You totally got this. I see nothing but wins and fantastic stories all the way around.
    Go get ’em.

  157. Jenny- EVERY time my body presents a new issue I leap immediately to the worst-case scenario. A few years ago I had something pressing on my throat. I had to hold my head in a certain position in order to feel I could breathe naturally. I talked to my doctor, my dentist, I had swabs and ultrasounds and yada yada yada. No conclusive results, but I could feel it.
    Then it went away. My personal opinion is that my body was fighting something, and some glands were doing their thing. I’m sending you my positive “GO, GLANDS” vibe.

  158. My boyfriend had his thyroid removed because it got crazy big almost overnight. He’s had to adjust to thyroid meds, but he’s amazingly healthy. Sending you so much positivity and spoons!

  160. Your neck is being a real dick about swallowing? You will not die but I think I may from all the jokes in my head colliding. Seriously, I am a triple negative breast cancer survivor. You will be okay. No matter what you hear from the doctor, you will be okay. Worst case scenario, you will get medical treatment, and then you will be okay. When all is said and done, you will be okay, Jenny. Just breathe. And enjoy the vacay from, well…yeah. That.

  161. You are so loved, and all that love will protect you!
    Plus, my older sister had her thyroid out like 25-30 years ago, and she’s fine. She takes her medication, and has never had a bad day since. And, the little scar caused her husband (and, honestly, the rest of the family) to refer to her as “My little zipper-neck” which, as a fan of Young Frankenstein (it’s “Frahnkensteen!”), she kind of dug.

    Knowing Victor you have that to look forward to, and also — built-in Hallowe’en costume!

    Also, for what it’s worth, humor is HANDS DOWN the best way to deal with ANYTHING. You have to laugh, especially in the face of bad news, even when you don’t feel like you can. For example, at age 38, I was told I had a rare-ish liver disease that was fatal without a transplant I cannot actually have because of my drug allergies, and I had maybe 5-10 years to live. My immediate response, to the doctor was “well, I can stop worrying about my retirement plan, anyway. that’s a relief.”

    I’m 53 now, and my “official” motto is “There is nothing so dire that it cannot be helped by Sick Humor and/or chocolate”.

    Find something that ALWAYS makes you laugh (my go-to is any of the “cats with brain freeze” compilation on YouTube, if you don’t have something handy)

    Also, when stressed, I will go someplace away from humans and bark like a small and very pissed off dog. Relieves stress AND is so incredibly goofy, you have to laugh at yourself.

    Sending good vibes and tons of love and respect your way,

    Amy

  162. Jenny, Bummer!!! Most likely it has to do with Hashimoto’s. My husband was diagnosed with the “H” several years ago. We had never heard of this before. You are being most adult-like in getting checked out. My vote is that all will be well and you will be back to your normal (???) self shortly – I have a very good voting record. HUGS!!!!!

  163. Jesus, I FEEL better reading these responses and I’m not sick. I’m so sorry this is happening and sending white light and positive Yule energy your way <3

  164. You will be okay. You are doing the smart thing having it checked out. You are fine. Believe it if for no other reason than I do.

  165. I know a couple of people who have had their thyroids removed and they are both well. Good for you for getting it checked You don’t want your thyroid hugging your windpipe. Take care!

  166. My mother-in-law had her thyroid removed 53 years ago and is doing great! I have a friend who had hers removed 6 years ago and she is doing great too! I’m sending you all the positive thoughts I’ve got!

  167. You’re not just OK, you’re awesome. Really. You already know you have reason for your thyroid to act up, so there’s that. Thyroid stuff can be soooo dramATic – but the fact is, it’s also a (relatively) straightforward fix. If you have it removed, don’t let them tell you the recovery time is three days- it’s more like a week, but you will recover.

    And it’s not like they take people’s heads off to cure this anymore, so you WILL be OK, no matter what it is.

  168. I had my thyroid removed a few years ago. Turns out it was FULL of tumors, growing up my throat, choking me and making it difficult to swallow and to breathe. They were also, so I hear, choking off the blood flow to my brain. These had been growing for years, and the changes were so gradual that I didn’t notice until it was completely out of control. It was super scary, BUT- the surgery is relatively simple and I felt a million times better almost immediately! I had no idea how bad I actually felt until it was gone. Truly, I never was so happy to have had surgery. It was not cancer, but my Dr told me that thyroid cancer is the best cancer to have(if you have to have cancer) I guess it rarely spreads? Anyhow, the replacement drugs are easy, one you get them figured out and life goes back to normal pretty quickly. Happy to answer any questions you may have about any of it… love and all the best thoughts to you

  169. It’s going to be ok! I personally have not had my thyroid out but my step mom, co worker and 2 close friends have all had theirs removed, it went well for all of them and they are all doing fine now.

  170. You are being adult and doing absolutely the right thing to get this taken care of ASAP. I have a friend who had her thyroid removed when she was small and is now going on 70 and is in excellent health. You will TOTALLY kick this lump’s ass to the curb. Go get ‘em, Jenny!

  171. Jenny I am sending good and positive thoughts your way that all is going to be okay. It must be scary to wait it out but you will pull through. Oh, and tell your neck to not be a dick. 🙂

  172. It’s really annoying when your body just decides there’s a fairly essential part that maybe you can be without for a sec, like, ‘surely it’s not thaaaat important, right?’, even though it totally is. glaring at airways Thinking of good things at you! You’ve done good adulting by getting it checked out! Well done! Hope it gets sorted out sooner than soon!

  176. It’s going to be your thyroid. You may have some of it removed. You will get through it just fine, and find yourself six months from now taking one more pill per day and handling it just fine. You got this, girl.

  177. Prayers for your healing and comfort. There’s a whole community of us thinking about you and sending healing thoughts your way!

  178. Glad you are having it checked out! It could be any number of things! I am a nurse and can’t stress enough you need to find out what exactly is causing this! I have Thyroid nodules but they don’t hurt or cause swallowing difficulties!
    Good thoughts and hugs going out to you!❤️❤️❤️

  179. First, sending love, healthy thoughts and a boat load positive energy. Getting this checked is the adult thing to do. Going through these tests will be scary. Hard. We are all here —not holding your hand because that might be creepy-we are Jenny’s Army, cheering you on, sending our support. Whatever this is you, you will beat it. You are stronger than whatever is causing this lump. We have your back.

    Also, if it is your thyroid, could Zazzle make one in silver so we could wear them in solidarity? Maybe a thyroid-in-a-jar in silver?

  180. Being a hypochondriac is better than ignoring possible problems and not getting them checked out. At least that’s what I tell myself when I fear whatever disease I think I have. Sending good thoughts.

  181. You are being awesomely smart about all of this by getting things checked out. I am sure it will be something completely boring and text book and the docs will be disappointed that you are not going to allow them to discover the next THING ™

    I have not had my thyroid removed, but I know folks who have and everything is all good 🙂

  182. Good thoughts always. I read an article recently about a woman with a similar problem and her issue was salivary stones. As in stones in her salivary glands. They had to remove it and everything worked out. So that’s still scary but not cancer… so maybe helpful as an alternative? You an a kick-ass awesome woman who is a total badass warrior and even if you hide in your cat teepee- it is all good and will work out. Just know that it will take time. You’re being a total adult about all of this. No worries.

  183. It will all be good. I know three sisters who had their thyroids removed – two of them proactively before there were any problems (family history). All three are doing wonderfully and have acted like it was no big deal. The big deal is finding out things, not the actual doing things. You aren’t a hypochondriac for wanting to eat and breathe without choking.

  184. You are doing a great job adulting! My sister has Hashimoto’s, and had one parathyroid and her thyroid removed. It was a bery easy process, and she got to walk around with stitches on her throat. This bothered our Dad, who thought she should wear a scarf. She said she was not cold. I thought the stitches made her look tough. Hang in there! You will be o

  185. You’ll be OK. I don’t think you’re a hypochondriac – if you were, the doctors would probably treat your problems differently. You just have health problems. Turns out those increase with age (and I’m old enough to say that with painful confidence).

    So get yourself treated, get better, and we will all be there to cheer you on.

  187. I had my thyroid removed many years ago because of a benign cyst. The scary part was all before the surgery because of all the tests and because I hadn’t been in a hospital since birth. There was very little discomfort and I recovered quickly. I was left with an impressive scar and a large collection of turtlenecks, both now pretty much gone. Sending love and positive vibes. You’ve got this! Really.

  188. I had 2/3rds of my thyroid removed a few years ago and your neck lump sounds a lot like what happened to me! I had a toxic multinodular goiter which usually only 70-year oldish women get but my body was like “nah, gonna do it in your 30s.” It sounds gnarly but it really wasn’t bad. The worst part was having to give up caffeine until they took it out. I was like “You can rip this out with your bare hands right now if it means I can have a mocha.” But the surgery and recovery were much easier than I expected and the remaining 3rd of my thyroid works properly now! Sending good vibes that yours is something relatively simple! It’s always scary to not know but hopefully you figure it out soon!

  189. Someone I know had her thyroid out (I can’t remember why, but it wasn’t cancer), and her mental filter went with it!! She’s now a sassy spitfire of a woman, who can finally sass her husband back, and I love her all the more for it!! She has a little bit of a hard time regulating her body temperature, but overall she’s good!!

  190. I read this too quickly and somehow jumped to the conclusion that they might want to remove part of your windpipe, and I thought “WTF, can they DO that?” Yeah, don’t think so. I’m pretty confident in telling you that they’re not going to remove your windpipe. Does that help?

  191. You will be fine because you are strong, stubborn and fabulous! You have nothing to worry about! Sending you lots of love and positive thoughts and feels, you got this! 😎

  192. 1) You can have all of the good thoughts that I am not currently sending to other people (I have a lot left so they are yours!)
    2) You’re not a hypochondriac – you are being very good at adulting by getting this checked out so I am very impressed!
    3) Haven’t had my thyroid removed… But I completely believe the other posters who are saying they have and it wasn’t terrible. So please believe them too!

  193. For what its worth, some years ago I had a virus that caused my thyroid to be infected and swell. Very scary! Endocrinologist put me on anti biotics and high strength NSAIDs. Fixed it. Hope you recover quickly and without any problems. You are being very adult😉

  194. You are definitely doing the right thing by getting it checked out. I’m sending you lots of good vibes today. Not really like those in the cartoon below — I just thought this was funny and might make you smile.

    https://goo.gl/images/Jc4Hqu

  195. Thyroid issues run in my family like drunk unicorns, so I understand this fear rather well! An author I enjoy reading found out she had thyroid cancer, and it was described to her by her doctors as “if you’re going to get cancer, this is the one you want to have. It’s easy to treat, usually doesn’t come back, and it’s the least likely to cause you any long term effects.” To which she replied: “So it’s basically the Tom Hanks of cancers?” And it was. She had it removed, is doing wonderfully well and writing book #9 which I can’t wait to read. 🙂

    So. Good news is that you have awesome healthcare peeps looking after you, you have many magical friends on the interwebs cheering you on, and a fantastic family who’ll stick closer to you than an inflamed thyroid. And, even if it is the worst case scenario, at least it’s Tom Hanks. 🙂

  196. You’re going to be fine. You’re on my mind a lot but I’ll make sure to focus directly on the neck area.
    You are being so adult about this by not ignoring it and going to the doctor that I’m actually in awe. I’m pretty bad at adulting like this, so great job on that front. And I’d actually worry about you if you weren’t anxious about it. Maybe not to the extreme you are (because yeah, hypochondriac and anxiety just love to run with this shit), but worry is normal nonetheless. Deep breaths and keep telling your feelings to sit the fuck down and let the adult run this thing.

    Love to you, Victor, Hailey, Dorothy Barker, Ferris Mewler, and Hunter S. Tomcat. Did I miss anyone? Well, love to them too.

  197. You will kick that thyroids ass – no matter what the results are. There is nothing worse than feeling a part of your body that you SHOULD NOT be aware of. Makes me obsess and think morbid thoughts until I no longer feel them. Or I befriend them…there is always that option. I guess I fail at adulting. It will all be OK Jenny! Sending positive juju your way!

  198. The Maine Coons (Mr.Man and Little Miss) send lots of warm purrs, big fat hairy paws on your nose and large tails to waft across your face. They believe you will be okay. And so do I.

  199. I have had my thyroid removed due to cancer – it appeared in a lymph node next to it, an enlarged lump. I cannot lie – it sucks – because cancer. But it was not terrible and I am over 10 years from it and I am doing fine – the thyroid meds have to be adjusted every so often as I age and other things happen to my body. After surgery(if that is what you have to have) you look like you survived getting your throat slit so you could come up with a great story about how bad ass you are. And, just in case you didn’t know, you are already bad ass for all that you have been through.
    I am sending you all the healing vibes and virtual hugs you need!

  201. Hey, Jenny. You’re going to be okay. But it’s okay to not be okay right now.

    I had a 5cm thyroid nodule 9 years ago. I went through ultrasounds and those God awful biopsies for a few years before the biopsies started looking not-so-great. They took my thyroid gland out in 2012.

    The surgery itself was fine. It’s a very precise surgery because of nearby vital structures, so lengthy (I’m a PA now, so I really get it).

    Post-op, I felt like I’d been hit by a truck for a few days. Not sure if that’s run of the mill stuff or if that’s because they gave me Dilaudid as they wheeled me out of surgery, then chased it with 50mg if IV Benadryl when I turned red and blotchy and asked my husband to scratch my skin off. I’ve never slept that well in my life!

    6 years later, I’m doing great. Have only adjusted my Synthroid dose once in that time (4 months after surgery). SUPER important to take it correctly (on an empty stomach, nothing to eat or drink for 30 min after).

    Happy to answer any questions or just send virtual hugs.

  203. You are okay and are totally going to be okay! I think it’s totally normal to go to the worst case scenario; at least, that’s what I tell myself since that seems to be my default. Sending so many good vibes, thoughts, prayers and love you’re way!! Keep being a bad ass, you’ve got this.

  204. As someone who has been a hypochrondriac all of my life with bi-polar depression (I am sure these go hand in hand) AND diagnosed with and cured of breast cancer you will be great. It is what it is – take care of it with your doctors so you can get on with enjoying your life. Love to you.

  205. Jenny, I’m glad you’re doing the adult thing and getting this checked out. Chances are it’s nothing, or nothing major but better safe than sorry. Sending you all good thoughts and prayers. And cows. Because cows are cool. Moo.

  206. Sending you tons of healing wishes, admiration for being such a grown up in a scary situation, and thanks for all you do to help make us all feel better.

  208. I don’t know if this will help, but my husband had a huge lump on the side of his face (like the temple area) that went all the way down to his cheek. I was convinced it was cancer, but the dermatologist said it’s nothing and didn’t even remove it. Which, great, but really? I’ll just call him Lumpy McLumperson now. 🙂 It will all be okay!!!

  209. You are being very grown-up for getting this checked out. Adulting sucks but it’s good in the end to catch things on the earlier side.
    Lots of good thoughts for you.
    No experience having thyroid removed but if you can, before you do get it removed you should totally take some pictures of it talking to you like Richard E. Grant’s boil in How to Get Ahead in Advertising.

  210. I am saying everything you need to hear, topped with everything you want to hear, and garnished with marzipan T-Rex’s wearing tutus, roller skates, and tiaras.

  211. Sending loads of positive energy and sparkly stuff that sing your favorite music to soothe you.

  212. My mother had her thyroid removed about 15 years ago. It was so scary at the time and we were so worried that she wouldn’t survive or that she would survive but would be totally different. Looking back at it through the relief of several years, she’s just fine and as amazingly loving as always (perhaps even more so because she’s had 15 years’ more practice and the debilitating pain is gone), and we get the added bonus of making inappropriate jokes about her lobotomy and brain transplant. I know the thyroid and the brain aren’t the same thing, but some nuances aren’t important when there are Dr. Frankenstein jokes to be made. (The nuance between Dr. Frankenstein and his monster? Super important. The nuance between the thyroid and the brain? Apparently not so much. It’s all about priorities.)

    Not sure whether I’m being helpful or not. Not sure that much at all is helpful on this side of the scare. We all love you so much: take care and distract yourself by thinking up all your best lobotomy jokes now, is all I’m saying. They’ll definitely come in handy when you’ve come through to the other side.

  213. I had the same thin happen to me last year. I was literally choking, my thyroid was so big. It was the BEST THING EVER! to have it taken out!!! I woke up after surgery and felt like singing and dancing (I couldn’t, b/c I had just had surgery on my throat, but I wanted to!!)!! My surgeon actually said he’ll never forget how happy I was when he came to see me post-op!! If you already have Hashimoto’s (I did) you’re likely already taking synthroid, so that’s that’s no biggie.
    The best advice I can give you is to fight to get it out….it will change your life in a good way, and then you won’t ever have to worry about cancer in it again!

  214. You will totally be okay and I am joining all the others sending you good vibes. You do so much good for others Jenny, thank you for asking for this and allowing us to do good things for you!

  215. You are being amazingly grownup and impressively adultish (wouldn’t want to be all adult, there is no fun in that) getting it all checked out. My kitties and I are sending you happy healthy thoughts and purrs. The kitties have just added a few very serious head bonks and licks to the list.

  216. What you need is answers. As soon as you have answers you’ll feel way better. It’s the unknown that sucks.

  217. Healing blue energy headed your way. Good you didn’t let it go any longer. You are not alone. You have friends, family,and well wishers all around you who love you.

  218. My sister in law had hers removed because she has Hashimoto’s too – She had 2 surgeries to remove just the growth the first time and the thyroid the second – she ended up losing her sense of smell but other than that, she’s very healthy, happy and going to be married next year! 😀

  220. I recently had to have a thyroid biopsy because it was enlarged. I know I t’s scary . My doctor said 10% or less of thyroid masses are malignant, and they are among the most treatable of cancers. Mine was all clear, and I will pray that yours is too.

  222. I’m sending you all my love and positivity.
    My step-mom had her thyroid removed a bunch of years ago and she said it wasn’t too bad.
    You’re gonna be fine ❤️

  223. I had 1/2 of my thyroid removed in 1995. Recovery was pretty easy. You have to be right up on me to see my scar. Or be my new ENT, or my sister-in-law who is oddly obsessed with it. Sending positive vibes your way!

  224. I had half my thyroid removed (in hopes that the other half would keep working. Ha! No.) Anyway, it was a non-cancerous tumor. I healed quickly and the doctor put the scar in the crease of my neck so no one even notices. I went home the next day and all is fine. On meds to do the job of my thyroid but I can swallow and breath so that’s good.

  225. Sending good thoughts. You are wise to get it checked out. I had a partial thyroidectomy years ago, not sure it was entirely necessary because at the time they told me it was very slow growing & might never cause problems. Sounds as though yours is moving quickly though so I’d be worried too, breathing & eating being kind of important. Google iodine, might help.

  226. My mother had hers removed because of tumors on her thyroid and lived for 25+ years. I’d like to say she was super healthy but she wouldn’t take care of her diabetes. But her thyroid never bothered her again!

    It’s OK. A glitch in your holiday plans but you’ll be OK. Take good care of yourself and your sweet family.

  227. Not me, but my friend had her thyroid removed a couple of years ago. She is doing completely fine. Gets her levels checked regularly and so far everything seems to be under control. I think it is so common to have thyroid issues now that it is getting to be routine, which is good (in a “they know what they’re doing” way). I have a number of positive thoughts that I can share, so I will wing them your way across the prairies and whatever else is between us. 🙂 Good luck and well done adulting so well. There are many that could take lessons from you. Myself included.

  228. So, yeah, if they take that damn thyroid out it’s like instant weight loss for one, and you just take synthroid after that. My mom did it and she kept trying to get the doctor to up her synthroid dose because it causes weight loss if you take too much. My mom’s doctor told her she was being ridiculous and vain and my mom said “OMG!! Dr. Fran, if you had no thyroid and knew you could lose weight just by taking extra synthroid I know you would do it too!”. Dr. Fran told her to “stop fucking around with your synthroid, Geri, it’s not funny.” Our doctor uses the work Fuck way more than most doctors.

  229. I have nodes on my thyroid and they act just like yours do. I had a needle biopsy (not a helluva lot of fun) and there was no cancer. One node was bigger than the other and it’s the one that gives me the most trouble. My doc wanted me to have them removed (her mother had it done and was glad she did), but I’m holding out. I hope it’s nothing more than this for you, too.

  230. This really resonates for me. I have lupus and OCD… and my OCD revolves around health issues. So I completely fall apart when something health wise changes because I am convinced I’m going to die and that I have cancer. It’s slways that line where health reality and OCD meet that feels so terrifying and isolating. Because people can say it’s hypochondria but it’s not! Because I have lupus dammit! Anyway, bottom line is that it’s better to know what’s going on and get treatment or potential care then to not know. Chances are, based on your history, it is related to the autoimmune stuff. I’m a reassurance seeker, so I get it. You are adulting and doing the right thing by taking care of your body. In the meantime, stitching and knitting always help me refocus and help me stay in the moment. Get to stabbing!

  231. I have never had my thyroid removed, but am daily medications for mine. My grandmother and a friend both had theirs removed. Just have to take another pill or two for like. Grand scheme, I would rather that than cancer or something else scary.

  232. I counted out my lab work and it cost a pretty penny
    I put it in a test tube and I took it home to Jenny
    She sighed and she swore that she never would leave me
    But the devil take the thyroid for they never can be easy

    Mush-a ring dum-a do dum-a da
    Whack for my daddy-o
    Whack for my daddy-o
    There’s thyroid in the jar

  233. Sending much love and such strength as I can spare from Sweden.

    Your adulting game is on point.

  234. Sometimes thyroid problems are the hardest to detect, because many doctors brush you off as being “female’ and hysterical. I’d say you were lucky to find someone who paid attention.

    I had a hyperparathyroidectomy (whew) two years ago, when they took out one of the nodules that piggy back the thyroid, and it cleared up a whole bunch of problems that no one ever paid much attention to before. So having part or even all of your thyroid removed might not be the scariest thing that ever happened, either. And there is, of course, meds for that.

    And yes, hugely good thoughts (you’re tougher than you think, lady) and hugs if you need ’em.

  235. You, my darling, are going to be fine! That was a very, very grown-up thing to do to get it checked and because you were diligent it will all be ok. Much love from Colorado!

  236. Good thoughts, good thoughts, good thoughts!

    Bodies SUCK. It’s like they were designed to fail. 🙁 I’m sorry you have to go through this, Jenny. <3 <3 <3 from the other ass end of TX (up near Dallas).

  237. Jenny, you will be fine! My Mama had her thyroid removed when she was a young woman and other than having to take a thyroid supplement all her life she was in great health right up until she passed away at 100 years old a couple of years ago.

  238. You will be fine, I’m sure of it. My ex-wife had half her thyroid removed and she’s fine though she gets drunker faster now. Something about not being able to metabolize the booze as quickly.

    So you just might become a cheaper drunk! Money saved!

  239. Jenny, you will be ok🙂 Please try not worry too much over this. You are doing the right things. I have this very particular problem and I have the same disease as well. After much testing, my doctors put me on omperazle and that works. I no longer have these issues when I am on it. It’s a G.I. issue. You will be ok and you won’t need surgery. It is not cancer and you will definitely be able to handle it🙂 You are very good to catch it early and be seen. If you can believe it, it will be a hindrance over time than more of a fear. It will be ok.

  240. You are going to be okay. The doctors will figure this out, and no matter what, you will come through this, and you will tell us more stories about your dad and about snacks in milkbone biscuit boxes and about Hayley and etc. And we will be here loving you and doing the James Garfield Christmas Miracle and supporting Project Night Night and you and each other because of you. 💜

  242. A friend of mine had something similar, and turned out she had an enlarged gland because of mono. She is just fine, and you will be, too.

  243. This is a scary thing, no doubt, but you are doing the exact right thing and i know all will be well. My mother died young of cancer and if I find anything out of the ordinary on myself, I too decide immediately that I am filled with cancer and will be going into Chemo immediately – so I totally get the thought process. Keep reminding yourself that you are such a strong human inside and out, and the doctors will do their thing and figure it all out and it’ll all be fine. Sending you lots of warm thoughts and cyber-hugs.

  245. My doctor told me yesterday I need an ultrasound of my neck. Apparently my thyroid is also on the big side. I am also freaking out, but the truth is we are probably both going to be okay.

  246. Your thyroid is obviously in league with my employers, who decided that THE MIDDLE OF WINTER was the perfect time to gut the employee bathrooms for renovation… which means we have to use an outdoor toilet trailer (yes, that’s a “thing”) while the construction is ongoing.

    Thank you, thyroid, and bosses, for fucking up Christmastime. Except the toilet trailer has Christmas music piped in (of course it does)… is your thyroid singing holiday songs? If it is, maybe you need to get it removed. That could be really annoying come June.

    That being said – you, Jenny, are doing the wise thing by getting checked out by a doctor. Keep up the good adulting!

  247. I have lived the outcome that your anxiety is poking you about. I had thyroid cancer, I had my thyroid removed, and it all worked out fine. The treatment is surgery (you can barely see my scar) and radioactive iodine, so no yucky chemo. It’s a rough month or two going through withdrawal from your thyroid hormones and getting your meds right. You would be away from your animals for about a week while you’re radioactive. But after that, the challenge is being hyper/hypothyroid. And you’re already used to that. So, chances are that it’s just a goiter. And if the worst happens, if your anxiety is right this time, you’re still totally going to make it through okay. (feel free to contact me if you have questions about anything)

  248. My co-worker had her thyroid removed a couple of years ago. She takes thyroid meds to replace whatever the thyroid does. The majority of our office never even knew, and you can’t see her scar at all, unless you know it is there and actively look for it. The odds are in your favor, and it won’t be the end of the world if it has to be removed.

  250. “May you be safe. May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you live with ease.”
    I know this is scary. I, too, have gone from one medical issue to the next. But you are getting the tests you need so you can know what you need to do to kick the shit out of this thing. Which you will! And you have all of us sending you all the good thoughts and strength we can to help.

    Happy Solstice. Tomorrow brings more light and warmth.

  251. Hey. You’re going to be ok. You’ve got an amazing support system regardless of the outcome. Excellent job adulting and getting it checked out (how does spellcheck not recognize adulting as a word?? UGH spellcheck). offers hand to hold

  252. Sending good thoughts <3
    Everything is going to work out and YOU ARE FINE!!! It's going to be okay.
    I know you like funny cat videos but I'm a dog person, so here…

    I know what a squirrel and a Burnese Mountain Dog.

  253. Been there, done that! I had have my thyroid removed because it was about an inch across. It was discovered in, of all things, a chest x-ray which apparently went up that high. The operation was a piece of cake. It left a scar on my neck but, lol, the incredibly arrogant–almost to an comic level, considerate though-made sure the scar lay in one of my neck wrinkles so it is almost invisible. In my case it was a benign growth that the doctor said ran in families. And, though they tried many tests, it wasn’t until it was out that they could say definitively that it wasn’t malignant. Best to you, Jenny. I too, worried like a fiend, and dosed myself with anti-inflammatory tea and water.

  254. All is well. What is, is. You are perfect exactly the way you are. So are we all. Tough to wrap the head around, but I love to chew on it. FYI, my husband had his thyroid removed years ago due to cancer and they called it cancer with a little ‘c’. He’s been on synthroid for years (one of the most prescribed drugs in the world) and all is well. Sending love to you, dear Bloggess!

  255. Sending you all the positive thoughts! All of them!
    Well done you, getting things checked out by doctors.
    “All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.”
    hug

  256. I found out last week that I have HALF of the hemoglobin a human body needs to survive. So I go to the hospital to see if I have to have a blood transfusion and the first thing they do it…take blood. Umm…okay. Of course, being me, I made a hissing sound as soon as the nurse put the needle in my hand.
    Anyway, I’m pretty sure that if I can survive with no blood, you can survive with a weird lump. We’re tough like that. Sending you love and strength!

  257. I had growths in my thyroid that got to the point it felt like I was wearing a too tight turtleneck. The big thing to remember is if you’re thyroid level is too high for where you personally need to be it can cause anxiety. So, it’s probably also making that worse, too. A whiole lot of my other health problems got better after they removed my thyroid and my immune system lost its favorite target.

  258. Before I finally realized I had pulled a muscle in my groin cleaning out my pond in the back yard, I was sure I had crotch cancer. So if it is your thyroid and it has to be removed, you will be just fine. Lots of people are walking around without their thyroids. Thank the gods it is not crotch cancer!

  259. It’s super scary to have to wait for test results and it’s easy to imagine the worst case scenario. But it will all be okay. No matter what the problem is, there is a solution and it will all work out. Trust the process and take each moment as it comes and remember that they are just moments and won’t last forever.

    I have a recurring growth on my thyroid called a nodule and every couple of years they have to drain it so it doesn’t get big enough to cause problems like you’re experiencing. It took a LOT of tests to get to the point where they found it’s a “cold” nodule, which means it’s not messing with my thyroid function; it will just need to be drained every couple of years. I’ve had a bunch of ultrasounds (and biopsies!) on my thyroid now and I don’t like them at all, but my husband comes with me and holds my hand and it’s a little better. Find the things that make it little better and focus on those things. And hang in there!

  261. YOU’RE GONG TO BE OK. If it’s your thyroid, or not, or something bad, or not really tha bad, you’ll be ok. If you have to get something removed, then just cut the little fucker out and be done with it. Then go watch “How To Get Ahead in Advertising,” and you’ll feel much better.

  262. Sorry with respect to my earlier comment. It was half my thyroid, not the whole. The removal ended by lowering my thyroid levels and so I take a thyroid replacement. No biggie.

  263. Sending you all the good thoughts I have to spare

    I didn’t have my thyroid removed, but I did have radioactive iodine treatment many years ago which just killed my thyroid (I have Graves Disease). I didn’t end up with any cool mutant powers though, which I was a big disappointment. I was just unable to hold any babies for like two weeks…

  264. pick up a copy of Dr. Anne Myers ‘Autoimmune Solution’, it may help the Hashimoto’s. Wishing you all the best.

  265. You are adulting like a fucking BOSS!!! You show that neck lump it’s messing with the wrong motherfucker!!! Love you and you got this and sending as much good juju as possible!

  266. I’m guessing fur ball………just cough it up like all your helpers do 🙂
    Seriously, though, good thoughts coming your way and thank you for not ignoring it!

  267. Sending lots of positive energy your way – as a swallow therapist I know it’s pretty terrifying when something is messing with your breathing and swallowing, but you are doing all the right things to get it taken care of! ❤️

  268. Jenny, I had my thyroid removed. It was 10 years in October, right before I turned 40. I did have thyroid cancer, so that was the reason for removal, but I had lived with an enlarged thyroid (goiter) due to Hashimoto’s for decades. The only negative for me with surgery is that the parathyroid glands were damaged, which means my body has a hard time keeping calcium in my system. So, I take my daily thyroid pill and I take calcium pills. I’ve been taking thyroid pills on and off since I was 18. The only downside of getting older is that the number of pills I take has quadrupled due to other medical issues not related to the thyroid.

    I wish I could come down to Texas and hold your hand and let you know that you can get through this thyroid stuff and it will all be okay. The best I can do is send you a virtual hug, and if you need support, I’m here. You can DM me at Twitter under @LauraDryad if you have any questions, or just need to talk to someone who understands a bit of what you are going though.

    Sending you lots of love!

  269. Dearest Jenny, I think you are one of the luckiest people in the world to have the love and support of your fans just pour out. I read through all the wonderful comments and I wish that everyone could be as frank and honest about their fears as you are and be able to experience the genuine love and empathy humanity is capable of. With that, I wish you the best outcome, you are brave, and you will persevere.

  270. I will keep my fingers crossed for you. It will make it hard to wrap gifts, but so be it. Really though, will be thinking of you until I read your ‘All is well’ post.

  272. I had a milestone birthday yesterday and was well celebrated and loved, and I’m passing ALL of that on to you. So much love and good vibes beaming your way!

  276. Sending all the good thoughts – and congratulations on being n adult and having it checked out!

  277. My mom had her thyroid completely removed back before things were super high tech and all robo-doctors. She did well with little no complications, except for not exactly having a voice for nearly a month. (I think my dad was secretly enjoying this)
    Sending you all the good jujus!

  278. Sending all the good thoughts and vibes and anything else that will make you feel better! You are a warrior and you got this!!!

  279. Oh, Jenny, I’m sending you all the live and good thoughts!! You are definitely being very grown up to have it checked out and I’m proud of you for it! I hope it gets sorted soon so you can breathe and swallow normally again!! ♡♡♡♡♡

  280. No matter what, YOU WILL BE OKAY. You are now too important for the Universe to give up on. You’ve done too many good things and brought too many wounded people together.

    Your anxiety is understandable. Your body has been a total dick up to this point and fearing another unknown is perfectly reasonable.

    I have Hashimoto’s as well, and have not had any of my thyroid removed (at the rate I’m going I’m pretty sure it will just fall out at some point) but I am fairly certain that means ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream.

  281. Remember, it’s all going to be ok in the end, if it’s not ok right now, that means it’s not the end.

  282. *love. That was supposed to be love, not live. I’m not sure how to send live. Sorry.

  283. Proud of you for doing the v scary, yet most responsible thing and have seen your doctor. With that said, Girl, you are going to be just fine! Don’t believe anything different. You are going to be tested & everything is going to be fine. Believe it!

  285. Sending you positive thoughts! Today is the winter solstice, which means tomorrow the days will start getting longer, which means today is a magical day and therefore you will be fine!

  286. Jenny, I don’t have a lot to give at the moment (thank you, SAD), but I do have enough best wishes and happy thoughts to spare for my absolute favorite blogger. The internet (and I) would not be the same without you.

    The worst part about your situation is the not knowing; it’s scary. But you’re doing the adult thing, which is dealing with it immediately using the most appropriate medical avenues and trying your best to stay calm (though I realize that will fluctuate).

    Virtual hugs from both me and my dog.

  287. I had Grave’s disease, which was a hyperactive thyroid and looked like a huge goiter but wasn’t – also Goiter is one of those words that JUST SOUNDS DISGUSTING and GROSS and EW – anyway they couldn’t guarantee the surgery so I had to take a radioactive pill which was scary because the person giving it to me wore these like hazmat gloves and used loooong tongs to hand me the actual pill THAT I HAD TO SWALLOW!! Then I had to be isolated pretty much for a couple weeks (my kids were only like 3 years old at the time so THAT sucked a big fat rat ass, but I had to keep my plates and utensils & stuff separate, use a separate toiled & shower, no holding babies.
    To be honest it was sort of a nice little vacation AND in fact the only vacation I’ve had away from my kids in 23 years. Maybe they’ll give me another one of those pills. FINGERS CROSSED!
    Basically it just killed off my thyroid with no real drama.

    Shit, I forgot where I was supposed to be going with all this.
    YOU ARE GOING TO BE FINE! You didn’t ignore it for 3 years like I did, I promise you still have blood, and it’s most likely a little polyp or something easily removable.
    Trust me. I’m not a doctor, but I could totes play one on TV. 🙂

  288. I am sending you positive thoughts and prayers. Everything you’re feeling is perfectly normal. Scary shit is scary. It occurred to me that anxiety is an indicator of intelligence. So, you’re a fucking genius. Anyway, much love! You are such a light to us, Jenny. Let us be your light? You’re going to be okay.

  289. Sending you good thoughts. And yes, I had my thyroid removed a few years ago due to a large lump. The biopsy of lump was negative but did find a few teeny tiny cancer cells in gland. You never know what else is in there and now I get to listen to an “ I told you so” from my mother who urged me to go to doctor for lump as I was just ignoring it like you. I was able to take the dog for a walk day after surgery so it was no big deal for me,

  290. You are being SUCH a KICKASS ADULT!! I had a little lump in my breast that was cyst that went away on its own. I got a bit freaked out because my mom and aunt are breast cancer survivors. May your lump be they neck equivalent of that!!

  291. I’m new to your blog and I love it. You are going to be fine. Sending you healing thoughts and blessings!

  292. My mom always says “The Universe is unfolding exactly as it is meant to.” That usually makes me want to choke her out because WTF?!?!? But, the truth is, you’re tougher than you think you are, you’re more loved than you fear you are, you’re smarter than you tell yourself you are and you’re going to be just fine whatever may come because you can take whatever the Universe throws at you and use it to make thousands and thousands of people smile and laugh and feel not alone and that’s a Super Power! So stand up and tell the Universe to go get f*#&cked because Supe-Duper Chick has this shit handled!

  293. Thank you for putting on your big girl panties and going to the doctor. I love you and consider this your Christmas gift to me. I will be thinking good thoughts for you all day.

  295. It will all be ok. My mom had her thyroid removed and never thought another thing about it other than having to take medication every day (which I’m sure you are already doing with Hashimoto’s).
    Cheer up! I’m going for an upper GI and colonoscopy today and I’m really hoping the pooping will be over before I have to get in the car and fight holiday traffic to get to the surgery center.
    Note to self: Pack clean pants, just in case. And a diaper.
    Also – I’m nauseated and hungry all at the same time, and that is a weird combination. At least I didn’t almost pass out this time, which I did do last time. Very sincerely and heartfelt prayers were sent heavenward that I would not die on the toilet like Elvis. And also that I would not fall off and give myself a concussion and a poop fountain all at the same time.
    See? Things could always be worse!
    I will think of you, and you think of me, and both of us will be fine.

  296. My Mom had hers removed several years ago. It was an easy surgery. Easy recovery. She was 73 when she had it removed. You’ll do fine.

  297. My sister had part of her thyroid out earlier this year. It’s all ok now. Surgery is a scary proposition, but if it comes to that, I’m sure you can make it through!

  298. I’m sending you well wishes. I had the same scare in my early 20’s. It was just a mad lymph node, not sure what I did to piss it off. They removed it and I haven’t had any problems since. I have a cool scar now that I tell people I got when I was shanked in the po-po. 🙂 hang in there! You are super strong and we all love you!

  299. My love… sending you all the good juju and karma I have. This stuff is scary, but I am proud of you for taking care of you. Bodies are weird; I still have my tonsils and have bad allergies so sometimes one of my tonsils swells for a day a or two and then it goes back to normal.

  300. Several friends have mine have had their thyroids removed. No big deal. Easy surgery and recovery. One friend wore scarves for months to cover her scar, but no one else even noticed it. Sending good thoughts your way!!

  301. You are being extremely grown up right now and should be engulfed in warm hugs and good thoughts immediately!
    So hugs to you. I hope it’s is not a life changing our disabling medical thing.

  302. I can’t say if you’re going to be okay, but I can say you’re loved and cherished and respected by a lot of people you’ve never met and I am hoping things do turn out okay. I love your brain.

  303. Hang in there, Jenny! Remember, you’ve been through a TON of medical issues and survived them all; this is just another monkey wrench thrown in your works that has to be dealt with. Annoying and scary, but conquerable. I also recommend a cold gin martini or three to take the edge off and show that lump who’s still swallowing like a champ.

  304. One of my closest friends had her thyroid removed due to cancer – it took a couple of months to get her meds pinned down, but she’s good. And no cancer. You’ve got this, Jenny. Even if you think you need an adultier adult.

  305. Sending you so many good thoughts…and some baby slobber, because that shit fixes everything.♥️♥️♥️

  306. My mom, her sister, two of their cousins, my sister, and two of my cousins have all had one or more their thyroids removed. They have done remarkably well. My mom and sister would make up stories about their neck scar when it was healing.

  307. You are going to be ok. You can get through hard stuff. Look at all the hard crap you have already gotten through in your life. Some of it harder than others but still. You can do this. Also, good job at adulting and going to the dr and getting the tests etc.
    I am a Breast Cancer survivor sending my warrior strength to you! But honestly lovely you don’t need it cause you already have it!
    Love S

  308. My mother had her thyroid removed 3 years ago due to thyroid cancer. The docs told her if she was going to get cancer, that’s the kind you want to get. It’s super treatable, success rate in the 90s, (she didn’t even have to have chemo or radiation) and the recurrance rate is really low. Now she just takes a pill everyday. It was a little tricky getting the right dosage, but after that she’s been great. Even if this is thyroid, which it totally probably isn’t, you are going to be completely fine. You can totally handle this.

  309. I had my thyroid removed when I was 17. I’m 44 now and have had no problems since. Benign tumor. Scary for a 17yo girl to go through but actually wasn’t bad. No problems since.

  310. You have an awesome doctor, you are smart to go get checked out, we all want you to be okay – with a thyroid or without – and we’re all thinking good thoughts for you and your medical team!

  311. I also had a lump on my thyroid, it was benign, something like >90 percent of them are benign, so your odds are awesome. It was a quick surgery, then they taped my chin to my chest for like a while so I wouldn’t move and pull at the stitches lol so that was weird. But I went home the next morning and it’s all good. Sending you lots of good light.

  312. Thyroglossal duct cyst. Happens to me every couple of years. It’s fairly alarming, and really uncomfortable, but no big deal. You can have it removed, but I’ve been kind of meh about that.

  313. Hugs sweet Jenny! I had half of my thyroid removed when I was a teenager, and it’s not that big of a deal. Seriously. I’m the biggest wimp, so if I can do it, you can do it. Just for fun I used to point out my scar and convince guys in bars that I’d been in a knife fight. So there’s that silver lining.

  315. You will be fine. Hasimoto’s can do that. My daughter’s growth was very large. Two other family members had thyroid cAncer but years later they are fine. Another niece had the same as you are describing and had the lump removed. She is fine.

  316. Some folks (like my spouse) have all their thyroid glands (pretty sure there are only 2) removed by drinking a magic thyroid killer potion, aka., radioactive iodine. The only thing is that no one else can use the same toilet as the potion-drinker for a week because I think what happens is that the radioactivity makes the thyroids flee through the body’s exits – maybe one for each thyroid gland – and they might lurk in the toilet waiting for some non-radioactive person that they could move in with. Anyway, aside from having to pee and poop in a reserved toilet (which sounds great if you live with other people), no problems at all. If they only want to take out a piece of one, I can’t help you.

  317. I had a partial thyroidectomy at age 40 due to enlarged nodules. Lots of needle biopsies were done to determine that they couldn’t determine if they were malignant or not. I have Hashimoto’s too and that’s why he only took out the part of the thyroid with the nodules. The surgery wasn’t terrible. Sending you all the positive good thoughts that I have!

  318. Sending you lots of light & love & positive thoughts, Jenny.
    And you know it’s OK if this is not a funny post. We want to know how you’re really doing.

  319. I’m sending you amazingly good powerful vibes to help out with the neck issue. You’re winning at adulting by going to the doctor and you are setting a great example for everyone. My mom had to use radioactive isotopes to try to kill her thyroid (it was really acting up) and it was a bit odd for her, but she did great with it and is doing quite well on medicine without a thyroid. (Truthfully in her case the first dose of meds didn’t kill it so she had to go back for a 2nd dose!!! Kinda odd, but it is my mother.) I have hashimotos too which makes things interesting, doesn’t it? Hang in there, read a good book, drink some good drinks of your choice (tea, cocoa, coffee, adult beverages even) and enjoy some holiday stuff. There are a bunch of good marathons coming on tv soon. Mythbusters and Doctor Who even! Hang in there.

  320. Maybe this is why your furry family keeps stepping on your keyboard while you are trying to work- they sense your worry and are trying to be adorable to distract you and comfort you! I don’t know what your medical team will find out with the testing, but I do know you will be okay, because you literally have a 100% survival rate so far, and that is pretty impressive. Sending you hope and comfort and love and positive vibes and virtual kittens and rainbows!

  321. I had thyroid cancer and had my thyroid removed almost 5 years ago. I think the waiting for the biopsy was worse than the surgery. They did tell me at the biopsy the vast majority are benign. I wasn’t so lucky there, but haven’t had any problems since it was removed. So, worst case scenario turned out to be just fine. Hang in there.

  322. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this, especially in the midst of the holidays, which can make one feel like they’re being strangled in and of themselves. I also have Hashimoto’s disease and my symptoms have gotten worse over time. I haven’t experienced the enlarged thyroid (yet) but it’s probably coming. I say all this to try and reassure you that what you’re experiencing is par for the course with this auto-immune disorder. I hope you can find some peace of mind in the thoughts, energy, and words of all of us who love your blog and consider you a light in our lives.

  323. 5 years ago I had my overactive/enlarged thyroid zapped with radioactive iodine instead of surgery. I was literally radioactive, so my family had to move out and I couldn’t go anywhere. Friends assumed my throat would hurt so they sent me gourmet ice cream. But I felt fine and had a wonderful, introverted week at home.

  324. You all are making my anxiety about having a root canal today; on our 32nd wedding anniversary; 4 days before Christmas; with no insurance coverage for stuff like root canals; on a day the road construction crew is blasting so the short way into town is closed; if not go away, seem very, very trivial. Positive thoughts and prayers to everyone who’s struggling with stuff, especially Jenny. We’re all going to get through this with the support of this community and the other people who love us and care about us. Now I’m off on a two hour drive to the endodontist. It’ll give me plenty of time to send out healing thoughts. (Spell check says “endodontist” isn’t a word. I wonder if the doctor knows that?)

  325. I’ll be thinking of you and you are totally being a responsible adult by getting this checked out.

    This is going to sound weird but it’s one of those days where it’s kind of nice to be reminded that other people are having problems, too. My siblings and I all have various mental health issues and everyone seems to be having a hard time right now. It’s especially shitty because my sibling with schizophrenia recently had their meds changed just in time to go bonkers for Xmas! So much fun.

    Sending many many good thoughts!

  326. I had the same thing happen in 2008-2011. It was “just a goiter” in right thyroid. End of 2010 it became more of an issue and made it harder to breathe. We decided to remove right thyroid. The presurgery ultrasound showed a couple new growth on left and it became a total thyroidectomy. They took my thyroid 10 days before my wedding (Feb2011). I was fine. I wore a scarf over neck,I was able to run and laugh, and was a wonderful memory. My surgeon called me an hour or so after the wedding and asked me to come in. The mass on right side was hashimoto’s but new ones on left were cancer. It was caught so early the lady at MD Anderson told me that I shouldn’t even call it cancer. Every other doctor calls it cancer (and doesn’t deminish my experience in an attempt to “calm me down”). Since then we found a genetic mutation for thyroid cancer. My mom, my sister,and I all got it at same age. My reason for sharing all this is #1. Your fear of cancer is real but knowledge that it is the “best” of the cancers makes the situation better. #2. If it is just hashimoto’s then that is no small thing (insert inappropriate goiter joke here) and you should feel so much better afterwards. #3. Having a family history of thyroid issues gives me a unique ability to say that this will probably be something minor and the surgery will give you a scar that you can easily hide with a necklace but also inventive stories of how you got the scar are endless. Good luck and you have got this!

  328. My son’s girlfriend has thyroid issues and needs to have another surgery. She’s 21. You’re not alone. You’ll be OK. You have lots of people who love and care about you. You’re being not only responsible by getting things checked out but also brave. That’s why we love you. Thank you for all you bring to the world.

  329. You are totally being grown up. Good for you!

    I know a number of folks who had their thyroids removed (my Mom had part of hers removed). If it all goes you get to take another pill. But if just part of it goes you might not have to. You got this.

  331. Jenny, people like us with bodies that are medically strange and wonderful, have a ruogh path, so I’m sending you all my good thoughts, and am convinced that we are going to be fine no matter what.

  333. Sending healing and calming thoughts your way. And if you have to have a procedure that results in a scar, I will have to send you a necklace.

  334. My mom didn’t have hers removed but almost; she had hyperthyroidism, which they treat with radioactive iodine. But they gave her too MUCH, and burned away too much of her thyroid so she ended up with hypothyroidism (and no special powers which makes me sad). She takes medication and is totally fine… except when she runs out and forgets to get her refill for too long and her eyelashes fall out, and then i would come into the bathroom to find false eyelashes stuck on the mirror until her prescription came back in.

    Thyroids are weird.

    Good thoughts 🙂

  335. When I became pregnant with my son they discovered I had burned out one of my thyroid glands and that the other was now running the show and became enlarged. I’ve had all of the tests and even talked to surgeons about removal, but didn’t do it because it has been ok as is. That was 17 years ago and everything is still ok.

  336. A coworker of mine had part of her thyroid removed. Year or so ago, and a couple months ago they went at it again for some reason, she’s doing great and you will too!

  337. You are brave. As a fellow hypochondriac (just last week I self-diagnosed strep throat – flu – breast cancer, all at once), for me, it’s my imagination that’s the scariest. You’ve reminded me countless times that fear is a liar. Be kind to yourself. Breathe. You’ll get through this. You are loved.

  338. Modern medicine is amazing. Whatever it is, they’ll get it. And you have all the energy in the world from all of us who love you. The outcome is decided. You just have to go through the steps.

  339. I had the same issue around this time last year. Had a biopsy in January that was 99% certain it wasn’t thyroid cancer, but then around August it got bigger. Had to have surgery literally a week after I went for a checkup for a lobectomy of my thyroid. I had a cyst attached to the left side about the size of a golf ball. It was a day surgery, and the recovery was pretty uncomfortable, but I survived. It wasn’t cancer. I’m sure yours isn’t either, but I will be praying for you.

    Oh, and I can swallow a lot better now, so there’s that.

  340. It doesn’t matter if you are a hypochondriac or not. You needed to check it out carefully to make yourself feel better. And no matter WHAT it is, you will deal with it. You will. So focus on your next step, your next breath, your next smile. Leave the future to the future. Hug your family! And know you are getting tons of virtual hugs and good thoughts from Cali RIGHT NOW!!!

  341. Hey there. I had my thyroid removed in 2007. I’m on replacement hormone and we’re forever tinkering with my dose, but it’s no big deal. Tiny scar that you can’t even see. I’m glad yo7 went to your doctor. It’s definitely better to get this stuff managed as early as possible.

  342. Sending you so many good thoughts. I have several friends with thyroid issues who have had concerning weirdness pop up over the year and it has always been okay. Hang in there and hopefully it’ll all be cleared up quickly. You’ve got this- everyone is cheering for you!

  344. Hey, the great thing about us hypochondriacs is that we’ll usually never get something in an advanced state, because we go to the doctor for everything and a doc will probably catch it early.

  345. My mother, who had hyperthyroidism, had her thyroid removed. Yes, it was sometimes “challenging” to get the correct dosage of Synthroid/levothyroxine to replace the hormones associated with a functioning thyroid, but hey, it relieved a lot of other less pleasant symptoms associated with the malfunctioning thyroid. So it was still a good thing. Sending you all good thoughts for patience and healing!

  346. I had hashimotos and then it switched and went to graves disease, I had thyroid ablation where they kill it with radiation. I am feel much more stable with taking a thyroid pill than with my thyroid deciding whether it will be high or low. My niece had thyroid cancer and had it removed and then radiation and she recovered and is fine and cancer free. I think thyroids are little troublemakers and I am sure you will be fine without it.

  347. Best Prayers for your full recovery! You are totally doing the right thing by checking it out! If it’s thyroid-It’s totally OK! You will need synthetic thyroid hormone for the rest of your life, but it’s easy to take. First thing in morning on empty stomach. My thyroid quit working in my 20’s. I only knew because menstruals stopped. I was HAPPY! No more monthly mess! Mentioned to doc who was horrified that this should happen AT MY AGE. Put me on synthroid. The cycle resumed-total bummer-until it finally stopped at a more normal age of 50. Thank goodness. Still taking the synthroid-thyroid regulates A WHOLE BUNCH OF IMPORTANT STUFF IN YOUR BODY! Never had the thing removed. It’s still in there, the slacker. Hugs, prayers, best wishes coming your way. Not physically-just through the Good Vibes Network.

  348. My uncle had part of his thyroid removed in the 70s and my cousin’s husband was actually born entirely without one and they are both healthy people. Good luck!

  352. You’re gonna be just fine! You got this. It’s not cancer. It’s just your awesomeness making a bump because there’s so much of it. You. Are. Going. To. Be. Fine. Sending you lots of love and strength and good thoughts!

  353. You will be okay!
    You are brave for getting it checked out!
    Sending you soft Rolly pats
    xoxoxo

  354. You’ll be okay. You are loved and cared for and you’ll be okay. Because you went to the doctor like an adult and that’s called taking care of yourself and that’s a good thing.

    You will be okay.

  355. Positive energy, tons of love, many compassionate hugs, and a listening ear being sent to a person who is not only being very adult about all this, but is setting a good example for others who might be putting off medical care.

  357. It might be my own hypochondria, but I like to think about worst case scenario and whether I can deal with that–then the actual issue which is nearly always must less dire seems so much more manageable. So, my wife had thyroid cancer 30 years ago. They took it out, she takes synthroid. All is well. no biggie. And thyroid cancer has a 98% survival rate, so even if it IS cancer, you’re still good. I know this is scary. Sending good thoughts for a much less dramatic outcome, but in any case, you’re going to be OK.

  358. You are being so very grown up. So much more grown up than me. I found a lump in my armpit a month ago and I’ve refused to see the GP. My mom is coming Sunday, so I’ll see the GP while she’s here, or at least that’s my excuse for not going so far.

  359. So…I had my thyroid out a few years ago – there was a smallish benign tumor which was hiding an even smaller malignant cancer. But it turns out that thyroid cancer is one of the least “bad” cancers to have…I get blood drawn twice a year or so to make sure I don’t have a small recurrent mass somewhere, but they don’t tend to do really bad things. The surgery had me overnight at the hospital, and I’ve got a 2-inch scar in my neck fold. No biggie. I have a few friends who have needed treatment with radioactive iodine for overactive thyroid tumors…it didn’t give them super spidey powers, sadly…whatever happens, you’ll be ok!

  360. Sounds like you are doing exactly the right thing. Even if it is something serious you’ll still be A-OKAY…because you are a strong person. You really are…let that in.

  361. I’ve had Hashimoto’s for over 20 years (probably much longer, but that’s when it was diagnosed) My thyroid has enlarged and shrunk (to the point the ultrasound tech got the doctor to view it during the procedure. It was so small it was hard to identify) I still have whatever BB size thing is left. I’m doing fine.

  362. You ARE OK, you were a TOTALLY responsible grown up to get it checked out. And I haven’t had my thyroid removed, but my mom did & she was fine. My best friend did and she had to switch types of salt & take thyroid medication but she’s fine. And, if you do have to have it taken out, you’ll end up in the hospital (maybe even outpatient) which means lots of sleep and people feeding you and then– once you get home– you explain that you CLEARLY can’t do any housework because your thyroid hurts. It’s that “ghost limb” syndrome, and you’d explain more about it, but you’d clearly begin to cry & we don’t want that, so the best thing you can do, Victor, is just finish the laundry and ironing, mop the floors, fix dinner, and let me lie here and adjust to my new thyroid-less life. slight gulp and sniffle.

  363. All the spoons and hugs to you, wonderfully whacky lady!! No idea if you’re a hypochondriac but you are definitely adulting by getting this checked out. If they have to remove your thyroid, you may need to take a daily pill – my mom’s done that most of her adult life. No biggie!!

  364. Sadly I know exactly how you are feeling, as I am going through much the same thing right now- only my lump is in my breast. Had a mammogram and ultrasound last week and biopsy is scheduled for the day after xmas. One minute I am petrified and the next I try to tell myself that i’m over reacting and it’s nothing. I haven’t told my four (grown) kids yet – didn’t want to ruin their holidays. I am just so nervous and, like you, just wish someone could tell me I’m going to be okay. I will be thinking of you and hope we both get the outcomes we are looking for. Sending you a hug and good thoughts.

  365. I am much the same as you, in regards to my immediately deciding that I have cancer when I find a lump or have a headache. That said, you are doing the right thing by going to the doctor and having everything checked out. I will never call you a hypochondriac, because you know your body, and you know when something isn’t right. Not to mention that you don’t like to go to the doctor, so if you do, something’s up. I send you tons of “you’ll be ok” vibes, as well as some deep breaths!!

  368. You sound so much like the voice in MY head that it’s scary! I don’t think you’re being a hypochondriac at all—this is something anyone should get checked out. I have a very large nodule on my thyroid and have had it for years. My endocrinologist (one of the best in the U.S.) does ultrasounds and occasional biopsies to make sure all is well. I still have my thyroid and there’s been no mention of having it removed. I think in the beginning it did feel uncomfortable and almost like choking but honestly I haven’t noticed it for years and it’s still the same size. I also have Hashimotos.

    Sending you lots of love and hugs today. I know how hard this is. I am going through a period where I pretty much am afraid I’m going to die every day (late peri menopausal anxiety), so I really get this. One thing that has helped me to no end is listening to guided meditations on Insight Timer. It’s free. Thank you so much for all you do and for being you—you’re a true bright spot in the world.

  369. I’ve had my thyroid removed and it wasn’t terrible. No more so than any surgery. It’s been 34 years, and I take a pill every day. That’s all there was to it. You’ll be fine!

  370. I have Hashimoto’s and have had a number of biopsies, but no removal so far. You are on top of things, so I know you will be fine. Hardest part for me is figuring out the meds and what else is affected by having Hashimoto’s. Sending you speedy resolution thoughts!

  371. This is not hypochondria; this is you taking care of your health. It is DEFINITELY WORTH IT.

  373. I have Graves’ disease and didn’t have my thyroid removed and honestly there are days I wish I did have it removed. Stupid autoimmune issues! Hang in there it’s gonna be okay.

  374. I will tell you what I tell my daughter when her anxiety starts to rear it’s ugly head…Everything is going to be ok. Which just means that you are loved and things will happen and you will get through it. I’m sending my super vibes!!

  375. I went through this. At last count I had 9 nodules. One got big enough to be kind of noticeable. Ultrasounds and biopsies, all cystic and benign. Unless you have a family history of thyroid cancer, dont freak out.
    I got through it by calling them my neckbabies. I posted ultrasound pics and named them and planned a baby shower. Named the big one EpiGladys. EpiGladys and the Polyps.

  376. Sometimes I think it would be easier to just not have a thyroid instead of having one that works half-assed. You might end up feeling better than ever! Merry Christmas and thank you for all the laughter.

  378. I have a low thyroid, so I take the synthetic thyroid medication to ensure I’m getting the right amount daily. the end result was feeling better & losing some weight, but my sense of taste is a bit crazy now. sims things I used to love now tastes horrible. some csus I can eat certain things, but can’t the next day due to taking odd.
    I hope things turn out for the best, hang in there 😊

  379. I had my thyroid removed (one half at a time, my first doc was an IDIOT) and it’s outpatient surgery. Easy-peasy. Hurts way less than having your wisdom teeth out.
    Like any surgery, you’re gonna get a list of everything that COULD go wrong, because the medical community strongly believes in CYA. It will sound very scary. Pretty much all of it is one-in-a-million type stuff, tho.
    ANNOUNCEMENT: DO NOT ACCEPT A PRESCRIPTION FOR GENERIC SYNTHROID (Levoxil) because many, many tests have shown the efficacy varies between batches and manufacturers. Your insurance will want you to. If you have a good endocrinologist, he WON’T write it. Bite the bullet, pay for brand name Synthroid, be safe and well.
    I’m proud of you for taking care of this. Email if you want to talk.

  380. My grandfather had his thyroid removed when he was a young man. He lived to be 96 and was healthier than me right until a back tumor snuck up on him and killed him. He was also very slender. Even if it was thyroid cancer, I’m pretty sure that’s about the most no big deal cancer out there. Cousin’s fiancee had it. He is totally fine. But it’s probably not even that. I can’t count how many times I have convinced my own self that I had cancer and it turned out to no big deal.

  381. I had a huge nodule on the left side of my thyroid. Anytime I was sick with respiratory stuff it felt like I was being lightly choked. They did 2 rounds of needle biopsies that were inconclusive as well as a genetic profile of the mass that was also inconclusive before finally just taking the thing out already. Surgery was this past Thanksgiving. My throat hurt from the breathing tube more than anything after the surgery. The incision hurt some but, seriously, I slept for a week, and then was at 1/2 speed for a week, and am pretty much fine now. There is this ugly scar that I am told will mostly look like a neck fold in a few months. For now it looks like the little brother of Mr Sweet from Doctor Who.

  382. I had my thyroid “removed” by swallowing some sort of radioactive pill. It killed it, painlessly, except I had to avoid people, pets, and metal silverware for a few days. Except for my daily thyroid pill, which gets out of whack every few years, I’ve had no adverse effects. Hope your situation is solved as simply.

  383. You are not a hypochondriac, you are going to be fine, this is why you’ve gone to the doctors. You’ll get it all figured out, maybe have some neckbabies (thank you Stephanie for that phrase!), and just think of the fun the cats will have stepping on your throat! Meanwhile, know that you are loved and good things will happen and you have a lovely family to help you cope. Sending healing vibes and banishing thoughts to that pesky neckbaby!