Weird in every language

I don’t how many languages my books have been published in but I am always amazed at the strange and wonderful covers that show up in all the various countries.  Today I got to see the Russian cover for Let’s Pretend This Never Happen and it’s pretty fucking glorious:

Victor had questions about why Russia thinks a rabbit would sell better than a mouse and I have questions too but mainly those questions are about whether this rabbit is available for purchase and whether I should name him Rabbit Downey Jr or David Hasselhop.

105 thoughts on “Weird in every language

Read comments below or add one.

  1. May I consult you the next time I have anything that needs a name? You come up with the BEST.

  2. Rabbit De Niro? I dunno… it’s like they put the March Hare on the cover. Is Alice in Wonderland big over there?

  3. Are you sure that isn’t Kenneth Bunnagh? (if not, I’d lean toward Rabbit Downey, Jr.)

  4. Bawhahaha my first thought was omg I want the rabbit. Also definitely Rabbit Downey Jr then we could have iron rabbit. If not the I vote Rabbit Patterson

  5. That totally looks like the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland…does that make you Alice?

  6. Rabbit Downey Jr!!!!!!! You do come up with THE most awesome names 😀

  7. My comment didn’t post so here I go again. Rabbit Downey Jr.! You do come up with THE most awesome names 😀

  8. How about Bunny Sanders?

    (Or Elizabeth Warren. No name change necessary. ~ Jenny)

  9. That’s clearly a Rabbit Downey Jr. because he’s way too fancy to be a David Hasslehop. 😉

  10. You should get two and use both names. I’m sure they’d like to pal around together.

  11. Oooh, you down the rabbit hole as Alice would be a great cover for your next book!

  12. I think you need to recreate this rabbit, time to go taxidermy shopping. Also, pretty sure both Alice in Wonderland and taxidermy are reasonably popular in Russia so they were going to need to put something on the cover that says “weirdness ahead”. Because a dead mouse in a cape wouldn’t be enough of a clue.

  13. Rabbit Downey, Jr. without a doubt! This cover is amazing, I’m just sad Rabbit Downey isn’t holding a skull like Hamlet Von schnitzel. Do you know that there are people who work as baby name consultants? I think you’d be amazing at that!!

  14. I perform at renaissance faires and vounteer with a rabbit rescue.
    I might need this image as a tattoo…

  15. Omg!! If you find where to buy them, buy two. Name one David Hasselhop and the other Rabbit Downey Jr.

    Problem solved!

  16. I mean, obviously you need multiple bunnies so you can have both RDJ and David Hasselhop as well as some of the other brilliant names suggested in the comments. Victor would obviously go for more rabbits rather than none.

  17. Rabbit Downey, Jr.,благодарю. But it looks as if they stole an illustration of Lewis Carroll’s White Rabbit, put him in an Elizabethan collar (has he been wounded? Might he bite the hurting part sans collar??). The only differences are that Rabbit D. isn’t consulting his pocket watch, nor is he ordinarily holding what appears to be a cotton ball. Which begs the question, is he wearing makeup, and will need the C.B. to remove it? If so, he is better at it than I am. Mascara for me means “right eye has been restored to youthful glory, left eye has been stabbed with wand.” Wouldn’t you love to get a hold of one of the Russian books and check to see if the language has been … subtly … trumPutinfied??

  18. I predict that your book will become Russia’s best seller for years to come, eventually touching the lives of every single comrade inhabiting the Motherland, except for Vladimir Putin’s, of course. Since the publisher went for a well-dressed bunny instead of a shirtless Vlad, I doubt he’d have any interest whatsoever.

  19. Rabbit Downey Jr. Definitely. For Watership Down too,as well as Alice! You come up with the best names!!!

  20. That’s definitely a royal bunny, Jenny, so I’d name him King Rabbit I of Scotland or Rabbit the Bruce as he was also known.

  21. Get two! They can be Rabbit Downey Jr and his 1/2 brother David Hasselhop.

  22. Poster who suggested Mikhail Baryshnikhop…..brilliant! Love the two suggested, but the Russian spin takes it.

  23. Isn’t this my namesake Sid, the cussing bunny that was one of Craig Ferguson’s skit devices
    on the Late Late Show? Looking pretty posh for a potty mouthed Cockney rabbit.

  24. My Russian coworker says the title literally translates to, “Lets all together pretend this never happened,” but that culturally, the rabbit in the fancy clothing makes it seem like aristocrats , sitting around a table, and a servant spills red wine on the white table cloth, and the aristocrats sitting around the table say,”Let’s never speak of this again,” in Russian, of course. 😁

    (I love this so much. ‘THE ARISTOCRATS!’ ~ Jenny)

  25. Does Haley realize how lucky she is to have a regular name? Or is it short for something we don’t know…

  26. I need that rabbit and he should definitely be Rabbit Downey,Jr!

  27. “Rabbit Downey Jr or David Hasselhop” This is the quality content that will keep me coming back forever and ever.

  28. How do you come up with these names? I just love them but I would never think of them. You should open a business of just naming things. Totally not kidding.

  29. What I find weird is that at the top, they used Russian Cyrillic characters to spell “bestseller”… not in Russian. No idea what it would be in Russian, but pretty sure it’s not “bestseller”.

  30. Robintmp, brilliant photo! Perfectly captured the essence of Rabbit Downey Jr, which of course should be the name of the Russian Rabbit in Red.

  31. david hasslehop of course. he’d look ridiculous in an iron man suit.

  32. I have questions. Wonder what the crossed out word on the cover means and do you think Russian children write their ‘N’s the “right” way when they are learning how to write? What if they had a Russian parent and an English parent and they received mixed messages on the topic. Wonder if that comes up in therapy much?

  33. David Hasselhop. And then you need to knit him a pair of red swim trunks and strap one of those red floatie things across his chest (you know, that thing the lifeguards in Baywatch would give to people who were drowning so they could hang on to it?)

  34. anon #69: I grew up in a bilingual household, and can say that no therapy is needed. The “backward” n’s are actually not n’s. They are a completely different letter in Cyrillic that is closest to our letter “i” but even that doesn’t quite capture it properly…. but for bilingual kids it isn’t all that confusing (hence my strong belief that kids should learn as many languages as possible when they are young and their synapses are still budding and connecting to each other)

    The crossed out word is “almost” – the entire phrase on the side of the book reads “almost true events” which I guess is their take on “A mostly true memoir.”

    Hope that helps!

  35. OMG David Hasslehop! I just laughed so hard! Thank you that made my morning ( I’m easily amused) stay weird girl!

  36. RABBIT DOWNEY, JR!!!!! LOL!! You are the best at naming things. 🙂 🙂 🙂

  37. It is a weird hybrid animal — mousie face, bunny ears. Also, I have about a bazillion books in good condition that I would be thrilled to donate.

  38. Hi Jenny

    Saw a recent tweet about someone who appeared to be a domestic violence victim based on the terminology you used. Turned out to be someone who is mentally ill? When you use YOU ARE SAFE OR YOU ARE IN A SAFE PLACE that terminology implies that’s domestic violence. You are very creative please find a way to differentiate the two.

  39. your names are SO creative. i wish i had that ability…. i stay pretty low key. i would have called him Fiver (Watership Down). completely off topic, i got a lego email today that they are about to release a Stranger Things lego set. i wasn’t a fan, but the set looks fucking amazing!

  40. David Hasselhop. And then find a model of the KITT car and stick him behind the wheel. Be sure to put him in a black leather jacket to complete the look.

  41. I’d go with Rabbit Downey Jr. But I was also thinking the rabbit is Russian and it looks like it is dancing. So, maybe Mikhail Rabbitshnikov? Nyet, maybe not.

    (Damn, just saw someone else suggested a Baryshnikov theme name. Oh well, I’m going to leave it anyway.)

  42. Sir Buncelot? He could slay little thimble sized dragons in your honor! 🙂

    I had a little white rabbit like this but she had pink eyes so I naturally named her Pinky as in the cartoon “Pinky and the Brain.” I’m not a naming wizard like you!

  43. Um, why not Nobunny? After all, you’re Nobunny till Some bunny loves you.

  44. Oh. My God. I am laughing out loud at work and everyone hears you in a cubicle warren.
    OMG I restarted my giggles.

  45. From what I can tell, Alice in Wonderland was indeed a big deal in the countries formerly known as “the Eastern Block”. There’s a Czech Alice that I’ve heard of — partly live-action, partly stop-motion animation. _WITH TAXIDERMY. That’s all I knew until I looked up the filmmaker’s name for you: Jan Svankmajer.
    I’m not an Alice fan 😉 but this actually catches my fancy now that I see it…I wonder if it’s on the web, where all things are brought to our door.

  46. The 12yo suggests Bunny Barnes …and get another to be Natasha Romanhop. It would be a MARVEL-ous pair.

  47. Both names are awesome, it’s hard to choose!!! Off-topic sorry, talking of translations.. Japan needs you! Like seriously..mental health here is awful, there is so much shame here.. I hope your book gets translated here soon so I can recommend you far and wide here. So far it’s in Chinese I think..

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