Hi.

in Random Crap

I’m still alive. And…better? I think. It’s hard to tell for certain but I know you worry when I go missing so…I’m here. And I can’t tell if this is a positive and hopeful post (because I tend to only write when I’m feeling better and so it’s good that I feel up to writing this) or if it’s a depressing post (because it’s basically just me giving proof of life) but I’m leaning toward the first. And I do have lots to write about but I don’t quite have the spoons to finish anything I’ve started. I promise I’ll be back soon.

Thank you for not giving up on me.

158 thoughts on “Hi.”

Read comments below or add one.

  2. No worries, we totally understand. Well I do at least and that should be enough.

  9. I think that’s how we make it through, we don’t give up on each other.

  12. Glad you checked in and you’re climbing 💜 We’ll all still be here when you’re ready. Good to hear from you.

  15. We love you. However much that helps, we will continue to keep you in the light.

  16. Checking in with people who care about you is a shows you are taking a step towards feeling better. Congrats on forward momentum!

  17. We’ll never give up on you because you never give up on us – and you remind us not to give up on ourselves, either!
    Wishing you days of abundant spoons in the future.

  18. thanks for checking in. I have enough spoons to worry but not enough to dig and make sure you’re ok, so I appreciate it.

  22. I hope you feel better soon. We love you!

    This clip has lifted my spirits on some occasions:

  23. Thanks so much for posting. I’m so relieved & grateful that you’re doing a bit better (as proved by the fact that you’re posting). Keep up the good fight. You’re worth it. And we’re all here for you.
    Big (masked, breath-holding) Hug.

  25. Sending all the love, and I’m so glad you’re still with us. We’ll never give up on you.

  26. Proof of life is always good!!! I sometimes tell my friends to send me photos with something current so I know their alive (especially for my single friends going on dates) thank you for updating us!!!

  27. Glad you felt well enough to give us a hello. It’s tough. I have so many plans and then just lay on the couch all day. We can only do our best. Rooting for you and wishing you the best ❤️

  29. Thanks for letting us know you’re ok…you know we worry. Now we don’t have to worry about you and can go about our usual business of worrying about toilet snakes and that one thing we said to that kid in sixth grade. Hugs!

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  32. It’s the little things. You’re alive, I’m not pregnant. I’ve had coffee, you’re awake. You posted, my room mate yelled at BK corporate for the store not being open and not having a sign up to say the hours were not correct today. It’s a day.

  33. Honestly saying how you feel is way, way more than just proof of life. And it helps me, who knows exactly how you’re feeling now and who can remind you that it will change.

  36. I was thinking of you just this morning and hoping your treatment was helping. Hugs!

  38. To anyone reading this. You got this, you beat yesterday, you’ll beat tomorrow.

    No longer are we living in a society that forces social norms of pushing ourselves to show up. The new social norm is to put mental health, and personal life first. Take that mental health day, go on an ice cream bender. This is your only life, live each day for the sake of self care.

    It’s okay to not have enough spoons, or to not be online for a bit. You’re mental wellbeing is important, when you have the spoons, spend them on your family and self first. It’s okay to not be okay.

    I’m cheering you on, and sending all the love and support.

  42. I’m the freaking Houdini of disappearing and have to constantly apologize when I go away. It makes me feel guilty and exhausted. Thank you for not overextending yourself and for healthfully acknowledging your limits. You are a reminder to me that I need to acknowledge my spoon count too.

    I applaud you too for harnessing your joy through things like your button collection, making adorable butterfly cutouts at the store, etc. Yay for positive self care and joyful choices!

  53. So happy you’re OK. I’m really looking forward to hearing about your treatment, when you are ready to talk about it.

    I had a very bad reaction to that medication a couple of years ago, and oddly, hearing about what it was supposed to have been like will be helpful, I think.

  55. Hi back. I feel you on spoons. Pregnant and getting my arse handed to me. Yesterday I was able to shower for the first time in 3 days. On new meds now. Hopefully they help!

  56. You take care of you and we’ll be here whenever you’re ready ❤️

  58. One foot in front of the other. We’ll still be here when you’re ready. Sending all the positives I’ve got…❤️

  59. Thank you for keeping on keeping on. Sometimes you just have to be proud of yourself for continuing to put one foot in front of the other. Sending virtual hugs and rainbows and butterflies your way.

  60. I’m visiting my mom and had to try and explain to her about spoons and how I just didn’t have enough. I’m glad to have something to use to explain how I feel to try and help her understand since I said I needed to disappear to my room for a bit bc of my anxiety. Thank you for that and for making me know it’s OK to have my issues.

  61. Proof of life is still positive as is knowing you don’t have enough spoons to do a big post. I hope you keep improving with energy and mood.

  62. Hi Jenny!
    My life is pretty good, so I feel guilty when depression kicks in. Your blog and books have been a lifesaver. Thanks for showing up. I know the struggle, and appreciate the fight. I am so thankful for you and the tribe you have created! 💕

  65. Well, I figure writing is a good sign. I’m going through the same shit myself, only I’m having more good days than bad. It just sucks that the bad ones still keep popping up. Longest battle I’ve ever had with depression. WE CAN DO THIS! I’ll cast a spell for us tonight–for all of us who are fighting the good fight. Blessed be.

  67. I feel this. I’m taking the time to enjoy feeling “better” while also punching any voice that says that I should have fought my way out of it sooner square in the face. It’s like whack a mole, but with slightly less glee and more pent up anger.
    I hope that you feel the good feels soon.

  70. Thanks for this. I’m in that place, too, so just hearing from you means everything.

  72. Your hi was great, some days that’s the simple, best thing! Thanks you, Hi back!

  74. Put your left hand on your right shoulder and your right hand on your left shoulder: squeeze! Hug from me! Love you!

  75. I will never give up on you because you never give up on me. Sending you peace and love

  76. I’m always happy to see a post from you. Also, I got T-Rex stamps from the post office, and they make me grin. Best wishes for all the oomph you need.

  78. I think of you every day to and from work because the two giant rooster statues (in two different yards!) have gone away. When they were there, I’d greet them with a Knock Knock Motherfucker! (maybe this is why they’re gone, but my windows are usually up, so not sure!!) But I always did this in honor of the first thing I read of yours. I look forward to hearing from you again sometime in the future.

  82. Thank you for checking in. I have an autoimmune disease and today im totally out of spoons. Or else i would send you some

  88. save your spoons and then use them carefully. Nothing needs to be done all at once.

  89. Pulling for you!
    Heard about you through John Moe and I have now read your books! Just signed up for the blog.
    Sending good vibes ♥️

  90. Hey. Thanks for checking in with us. I would totally send you extra spoons if I could. I’ve been running a bit low on spoons myself. Big hugs from me and the kitties. Stay well.

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  95. Thank you, you are on the right side of the grass………..LOL Nice to hear from you.

  96. Sending you strength. Take all the time you need to feel better. We will always be here for you.

  97. Thank you! I do worry about you when you don’t post. And then I try to send you good vibes in case you need them.

  98. Never! We will never give up on you. Your strangelings family has you in their arms and are holding on tight. We got you!

  102. Do what you need to do for yourself, and don’t beat yourself up worrying about us-we get it, I promise.

    Also, I just started TMS treatments for my own depression/anxiety issues on Monday; 35 sessions in all, with 31 left to go. They’ve been working on the treatments over the past 3 years, because it’s not as bone-jarring as it sounds like it was with you, and they only pummel my poor right frontal lobe for 1.5 minutes instead of 20-30 minutes. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it all works out, but I just wanted to thank you for writing about your treatments in the first place. I wouldn’t have known anything about TMS if I hadn’t been following you while you had your first round of treatments, and now I have friends and family members asking me about it because they’re thinking it might be a good idea. I should wrap this up for your sake, but I just wanted to make sure you knew just how much you’ve done for so many people just by talking about your own issues. **long-distance hug** Take care of yourself now, OK?

  103. Sending hugs and love!! Hoping the ‘better’ continues to get stronger.

  104. Am enjoying “Broken” and recommended to my friends, in New book group !
    Shine On ⭐

  106. Hang in there! I have clinical depression as well. Lots and lots of hugs.

  109. Hey I’m happy with a proof of life post. Sending spoons and faux hugs (they’re like real hugs but without the awkward touching :0)

  110. I’m glad you were able to check in! Hang in there!

    One thing I always find irritating about depression is that I have to figure out how I’m doing. Like being depressed isn’t work enough. They need some sort of depression blood test so instead of spending valuable energy trying to figure out whether you’re better or not, you can just go to the doctor and she can say, “your happiness globules are up! The new medication is working!” Instead of trying to think back before an appointment and try to figure it out. When I was in the thick of trying to find a medication combo that worked, I would even ask my [now ex] husband, “how do YOU think I’ve been??” Like it’s not exhausting enough. They need to cure cancer already so they can come up with a depression globule blood test. Or hair follicle test. WHATEVER. Just come up with something already!

  111. A Hi is an ok tip toe back. I’ll watch for the next…no rush, and hi back.

  114. ‘Thank you got not giving up on me.’ It’s hard when you have to say that, but I totally get it.
    I said it before myself. I’m still here, but they didn’t stay.
    Your team will stick by you!! So glad you are still here. Thank you for not giving up on yourself.
    You give the rest of us hope, Jenny. 💖

  116. That is for checking in. We worry. Hugs and love. We’ll be here when you are ready!

  117. Don,t fret. It,s baby steps and next thing you know it will be FORKS! Careful now ~

  118. Thanks for checking in, Jenny. I hope you continue to feet better and better! ❤️

  119. ♡♡♡ Love you Jenny! I’m so glad you’re at least well enough to check in.

    The world needs you, we’re glad you’re still fighting the fight. #depressionsucks

  126. We’re here. Proof of life from this end of the universe is good enough any day of the week.

    Sending love and spoons! Sporks, perhaps? They come in useful and have a little more personality.

  127. Well, you’ve got lots of ADHD fans out here and we lose time! So, it works out. I feel like I just read your last post the day before yesterday. 💜💗💛

  128. Never will give you up, never gonna let you down, going to stop quoting Rick Astley and just say: Here with and for you, darkness, despair, light and joy…so many with you, thanks for checking in!

  129. We’ll be here when you’re ready. Take your time and know you are loved.

  130. It is true, I do worry when you are silent. Thank you for taking excellent care of yourself. You are important in my life.

  131. Good timing – I was worried about you over the past couple of days. Glad you exist! Big hugs.

  132. Jenny you are beautiful and loved and your fans will always give you space and grace because you are so fucking amazing and honest! Take good care! We love ❤️ you!!!

  133. Thank you for letting us know, even if you’re not ok it’s good to see you’re here. Please hang on!

  134. Take all the time you need. If we have to wait longer, it will be worth the wait.

  136. We’re always here, Jenny. You’re not alone. Stay strong and keep going. You’re important. You’re valid. You’re enough. We love you more than you know. Stay well.

  139. I’m leaning toward hopeful, too! Life is rull hard so writing or posting anything is a triumph!

  140. Love you. Thanks for sharing. You spread hope just by being you.

  141. Thank you for the check-in. Please disabuse yourself of the notion that your loyal readers would desert you. We will hang in with you through the ups, downs, and anything catawampus. Power to the Strangelings!

  142. Jenny, you really don’t have any idea. You’re strong and resilient and brave and so very loved, by so many people. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself. You make a bigger difference than you realize.

  145. I love you, thank you for checking in. Even when you can’t see it, you are a beautiful light in this world.

  147. Thanks for checking in. We think you’re the shit and are happy to remind you.

  149. Jenny –
    Proof of life is always good.
    I’m in a same/similar boat. The view from the boat appears as if we are the only passenger. alone. adrift. did I mention alone? And that is yet another way that Depression Lies. Because we are not alone. So many of us out there… our tribe. And when we have more spoons and less depression we know that – we are here, we are legion.
    So thank you for checking in… reminding us we are not alone.
    Maybe when I have more spoons I’ll edit and strive to make this ^^^ more sensible. Maybe

  150. It’s all good. Sometimes we just don’t have enough spoons. Waiting is good.

  151. Everyone gets a vacation.
    You share so much of your life, please remember that you get to set boundaries with us too.
    If raising some walls some times helps (third Thursdays? week of the full moon?) we will be here when you decide to open the door again.

  152. My uncle collects spoons. Maybe I could get him to send you a box? Virtual hugs in the mean time.

  153. Take the time you need, we’ll still be here when you’ve found your spoons.

  155. We’ll never give up on you! You’re like mother Theresa only better, remember?
    Sending you hugs, strength, and spoons.

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