The first bloom. Or last bloom. Fuck, I don’t know. It’s a bloom. Let’s just leave it at that.

So tonight I’m going in for my 5th ketamine treatment for depression and I know some people really enjoy getting just off-their tits high but personally I enjoy a little bit until I fall into another dimension because I’m always sure I’m going to be stuck there forever but I’ve just found that if I don’t listen to the recommended meditative music and instead listen to music with words it helps remind me that people still exist and that’s helpful. Not as helpful? The fact that my playlist was all Taylor Swift and when I got to Vigilante Shit I was convinced that Tay-Tay was going to murder me so I went back in and only picked happy songs for a playlist but so far it’s only two songs by Lizzo and Billie Joel’s Zanzibar. Please give me suggestions?

And in semi-related news, I was just walking Dorothy Barker and I saw the first bloom on my magnolia tree and it was so lovely because it made me realize that maybe I’m getting a little better because I’m able to recognize something beautiful.

And then I noticed a bunch of dead petals on the ground and googled “When do Texas magnolia trees bloom?” and turns out they bloom February to April so I think what I’m actually seeing is the fucking last bloom, and I can’t tell if that’s really sad because I’ve apparently been so oblivious with depression that I missed a ten foot tall blooming tree, or really great because maybe this is a sign that I’m coming out of it.

I don’t have a good way to wrap this up because I’m starving and have to fast and I can’t have caffeine or my ADD meds so my brain is meh but I promise I’ll be better soon. Lizzo and I love you.

161 thoughts on “The first bloom. Or last bloom. Fuck, I don’t know. It’s a bloom. Let’s just leave it at that.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I hope it’s not the LAST one but if you give her some peat moss, she may return the favor with some extra blooms. Good luck with the treatment tonight and wishing you many more blooms thru April 30th!

  2. Love you. Enjoy your trip. Any time you get lost in the spiral, return to the sound of your own breath. Seriously. That sound has been with you from the moment of your birth. It will be with you until the moment of your death. As long as you can find that sound, everything is pretty much okay.

  3. “Happy Together,” The Turtles. “Signed, Sealed, Delivered,” Stevie Wonder. “I Feel Lucky,” Mary Chapin Carpenter. “Mr. Blue Sky,” ELO. “We Got the Beat,” the Go-Gos. “Love Train,” the O’Jays. Fingers crossed there is something in there that helps. And all hail Lizzo.

  4. I don’t think you missed the blooms because I’m in Texas too and mine are just now starting to bloom. So there’s hope after all!!

  5. And I love both you and Lizzo. Magnolia blooms are beautiful whenever you get to see them. No worries

  6. Anything by Jason Mraz. He is the most positive musical person I’ve ever listened to. Seriously. Download his entire canon. You won’t be disappointed. There’s so much more than “The Remedy” and “I’m Yours.”

  7. I loove music:

    18 – one direction – soft and lovely
    Midnight Sky – Miley Cyrus
    Thats What I Want – Lil Nas X
    Show me Love and/or Dancing on my own – Robyn
    Dynasty – Elephante, MIIA
    Last Train Home – Ryan Star
    Sweet Night – V

    I could go on and on but I’ll stop there. All happy or I am powerful type of songs. Some are more like dance tracks. Don’t know how that would work with your falling into another world issue. Good luck.

  8. My magnolias have not bloomed yet and I’m in DFW.
    This is the first bloom and I’m so happy you get to see it with joy.
    Music suggestion
    Lake Street Dive.

  9. Whether first or last, you noticed it and that’s what counts. I enjoy dancing to “Headphones” by Matt Nathanson. If you want to watch the video, you’ll get to se the backstory about how he’s helping give away hearing aids to people struggling with hearing loss. As a person who wears hearing aids, and should have been wearing them for 30-40 years before I got them, this is very meaningful for me. I hope you like the song.

  10. Judy Collins, Joan Baez, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, Joni Mitchell, Cat Stevens, Pete Seeger, Burl Ives, the Weavers, Peter, Pail and Mary, etc basically if it’s folk music it is mellow and interesting and has a very chill vibe even if they’re singing about lost loves, or human rights, or other songs about the human condition. Check out the list on the link below
    Have a great treatment!
    I love the way magnolia trees look but I don’t like the smell of them. I prefer forsythia or lilacs or Rose Of Sharon

  11. Flowers by Miley Cyrus. Kiss Me by Sixpence none the Richer. Lucky Lips by Ruth Brown. And maybe try Yuve Yuve Yu by The Hu – it’s words, but it’s heavy metal Mongolian throat singing.

  12. Some happy song ideas for your playlist – – but not necessarily so happy that they feel a little manic…
    Lido Shuffle, Boz Skaggs
    Peg, Steely Dan
    Everywhere, Fleetwood Mac

  13. “Walking on Sunshine” – Katrina and The Waves, You Make My Dreams (Come True) – Hall & Oates, “The Power of Love” – Huey Lewis and The News, “Love Shack” – B-52’s, and “Girls Just Want to Have Fun” – Cyndi Lauper. I hope you find a great mix and yes, seeing a bloom and appreciating it is awesome!

  14. Good luck! My happy songs include Dancing in the Moonlight by King Harvest or the Muppets version is pretty good too and Here We Go by Drew Holcomb.

  15. I can listen to Happy by Pharrell Williams on repeat pretty much forever. I’m sure I’m not the only one, since exists.

  16. I have been through that treatment and I found new-age meditation music, which I never listen to in any other context, to be extremely helpful. I found this song using a meditation app and I use it every time I get a treatment now:

    A friend who’s own experiences helped me decide to move forward with ketamine assisted therapy uses Chopin’s Nocturnes as their treatment soundtrack.

    Also highly recommend using a mask to block out all light.

    I hope it is helping.

  17. Few of my happy songs:
    Walkin On Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves
    Dancing Queen by ABBA
    Try Everything by Shakira
    Wonderful World by Louie Armstrong

  18. The Muppets – All Together Now
    Dorothy – We Are Stars
    Janelle Monae – I Like That
    Katzenjammer – Cocktails and Ruby Slippers
    Mary Lambert – Secrets
    David Bowie – Heroes
    Big Freedia – Good Times
    Eliza Rickman – Lark of My Heart
    Zoe Boekbinder – Turtle and Seahorse

  19. “The Big Sky” by Kate Bush is the happiest song ever. It’s on her Hounds Of Love album (the one with “Running Up That Hill” on it). Also “Coloring Book” by Rachael Sage never fails to put a smile on my face.

  20. Wellerman – Sea Shanty by Nathan Evans is delightful. Can’t really tell what the words are exactly but it sounds like happy pirates to me

  21. Ok don’t laugh but Fat Bottom Girls by Queen seriously makes me happy. As does Uptown Funk. I’m sure there’s others and when I go home tonight I’m going to listen to them all because this week has once again shown what a dumpster fire my life is and even though I’m not on ketamine, I could also use some happy music in my life.

  22. Broadway soundtracks. If you’re going to go on a trip it might as be to Broadway

  23. Some of my faves, Goddamn right it’s a Beautiful Day and I like the Way this is Going both by the Eels.

  24. Trust me on this…russian ska punk pop polka band called Russkaja has so much upbeat quirky music. Recommended tracks: The Best Things in Life are Free, New Life, Dance Your Tears Away and Hey Road. The recommended songs are all in English, but a lot of their earlier stuff is in Russian and a few other languages if you want escapism from what the words mean but still want to hear voices. Russkaja has been my OCD and depression obsession for the last 6 months. I hope the ketamine is working, I have a friend who had great success with Ketamine treatments, i hope you do too <3

  25. * September by Earth Wind and Fire
    * Build Me Up Buttercup by The Foundations
    * Joyful Joyful from the “Sister Act 2” Soundtrack (Lauryn Hill)
    * Hmmm Bop by Hanson (Acoustic Version)

    None of these are trippy or stabby and are, to me, irresistibly cheerful.
    My family have instructions to play “Joyful” at me if I’m ever in a coma. 😁

  26. In general, I listen to Barenaked Ladies if I need music to make me happy. ‘If I Had $1,000,000’ is almost a sure bet.

  27. Bill Withers “Lovely Day”. Such a feel good vibe. Lizzo and Pink are also good for power songs.

  28. I get nitrous at the dentist because I hate that loud noise right in my head so much. I usually listen to podcasts as the dentist or hygienist does their job. One time the podcast was about the doctors of the past trying to figure out what would work for sedation so they tried different drugs on themselves and it did not go great all the time! I’m laying there listening to this and hoping that the hygienist would notice if I died! And hearing all these stories of early sedation gone wrong 😫

  29. Birdhouse in your soul by they might be giants never fails to put me in a happy place. Good luck!

  30. I Already Like You by Dessa
    Folding Chair by Regina Spektor
    Gorgeous by X Ambassadors

    I could go on, there is just so much good music in the world.

  31. My most recent happy song is “I Don’t a Name for it”, by Steam Powered Giraffe. (Which you should just listen to for the band name alone, if nothing else.) It’s just so darn bouncy and positive and catchy.

  32. I’ll Be Here With You by Nancy LaMott – on youtube. She has a glorious voice and the song says it all!

  33. The Midnight – “Brooklyn.Friday.Love” and “Heatbeat”
    Barenaked Ladies – “If I had $1,000,000” for a laugh?
    ABBA – Dancing Queen
    The Monkees – Daydream believer
    REM – Shiny happy people
    Ice Cube – it was a good day
    Ben Rector – Sunday
    Tai Verdes – AOK
    Surfaces – Sunday Best

  34. Closer to Fine– Indigo Girls (kind of an anthem for me)
    Bus Bus– Amy Ray (like the driving rhythm of this one)
    The band Cat Empire is fun.

    And not sure how this trippy little song will work during, well, a trip, but the ridiculousness of it just makes me laugh:

  35. Paul Simon-Graceland and The Rhythm of the Saints. Both albums are pure joy.

  36. The happiest music I’ve ever heard is Sixty Six Steps by Leo Kottke and Mike Gordon. No lie it has pulled me out of every slump. I listen to it on repeat sometimes for hours and hours. I hope it helps you!

  37. When my daughter is fighting her depression,her go to is Judy in Disguise (with Glasses) by John Fred and his Playboy Band. Myself, I go with Nice Weather for Ducks by Lemon Jelly. If you Spofity I put a bunch of my happy songs on this playlist:

  38. Rickie Lee Jones: the magazine album, or naked songs -live acoustic album

  39. Some uplifting fun songs
    Monkey Tree .. Mother Mother (Canadian band) Walking on Sunshine..Katrina and the Waves, Love Shack..B52’s, Friday I’m In Love..The Cure, Bring Me To Life..Evanescence, Courage..The Tragically Hip (a little more Canadiana)

  40. Wishing you much luck and success with your treatments! For happy songs, I have to throw out “Get Up Offa That Thing” by James Brown, “Raspberry Beret” by Prince, “Dad I’m in Jail” by Was Not Was (because it’s hilarious), “I’m Free” by the Soup Dragons, “Born to Hum” by Erin McKeown, and “Days Like This” by Shaun Escoffery.

  41. My very best friend in the whole wide world shared his very best song for times when you need to laugh. He said it worked for him every time and he knew it would work for me. So on the day when I was feeling very scared getting onto the elevator on my way to the hospital surgical suite I played it, with headphones, set a bit too high, and an entire elevator full of doctors, nurses and random patients were treated to the Weather Girls singing “It’s raining men.” They all burst out laughing, which made me laugh, and suddenly I was no longer scared because laughter is the thing that binds us all together, even when the world is a hard scary place, and I knew they had my back and I’d be ok, and just like David promised, I was. 🙂

  42. Pot Belly by FreshlyGround is my absolute go to happy song. It has pulled me out of many a funk.

  43. Hey, you saw A bloom and that is amazing. I’m in day two of blizzard number 8,967,573,963 and I’m pretty sure that we’re in a Game of Thrones type NORTH situation up here in the Northern Plains, and I expect White Walkers to start coming down from North Dakota and Canada any day now. So yay for a bloom. And for ketamine and for getting better.
    And you know, you did take a trip not long ago, and went prom dress shopping with Hailey, and made book club picks, and wrote this, and probably lots of other things, so yay for your successes. Everything is harder with chronic illnesses and you are doing a LOT of things big and small including noticing a gorgeous magnolia bloom. Go you!

  44. I had to have an MRI once and a friend told me to download an album I had never heard and concentrate on the lyrics since they will be new to me and time will pass quickly. It was back in the day of iPods and I downloaded a Dave Matthews Band album that the MRI tech played through some headphones they gave me. I was HOOKED and to this day I seek out their music to calm me and relax me. I’ve even found some gems that are not on albums, like “A Dream So Real”. I hope all goes well for you. Hang in there Chick!

  45. Zydeco. Seriously. Every song a banger, all of it fantastically upbeat, and a lot of it in French, which you’d think might be off-putting, but I find fantastically calming because unless I make an effort I just sort of tune it out rather than getting distracted, then fixated on some bit of lyrically inspired what-does-it-all-MEAN-why-is-everything-awful mental tailspin.

    Gaelic music works too (any language you don’t speak fluently, really, but lots of Irish and Scottish tunes are particularly lively). Shanties and drinking songs, even in English, have that same happy making effect, too.

    I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you, whatever you listen to. Feel better, Jenny.

  46. I don’t what it would do to high af brain visualizations but I’ve always found the Hawaiian version of Somewhere Over the Rainbow to be very soothing

  47. Elvis Costello New Amsterdam, Richard Thompson Fire in the Engine Room, George Harrison Got My Mind Set On You, Bonnie Raitt Something to Talk About, Aretha Franklin Respect, Hard to Handle any version!❤

  48. Never had any ketamine, but when I used to get high on psychedelics, I liked to listen to the first side of Todd Rundgren’s “A Wizard, A True Star” quite a bit.

  49. Making playlists is my favorite thing to do and I have about 100 of them because I have a wide variety of music moods and genres. This one has been the most uplifting lately so please listen when you’re high.

    I also have a playlist called Manic Pixie Depressed Bitch (a play on manic pixie dream girl) so enjoy.

  50. My happy music are Pink Martini’s albums “Get Happy” and “Hey Eugene”. And any of Scott Bradlee’s Postmodern Jukebox versions of songs.

  51. Some music that makes me happy: Most stuff from the Cure, Toad the Wet Sprocket, Primitive Radio Gods, the Talking Heads, Christopher Cross, Rihanna, Santana, Bruno Mars, Lou Rawls, always Lizzo or Megan Thee Stallion.

  52. I suggest listening to Pink Floyd, mostly mellow and with words. Did not make me angry like most rock music did while on psychedelics.

  53. Highly recommend Ingrid Michaelson and Jack Johnson both for happy music

  54. I don’t see a way to attach a photo here, but if you’re interested, I’ll find another way to share one with you. My original orchid plant (I *might* have gotten it in spring 2014, but originally thought spring of 2010; anyway, I have six orchid plants at the moment) has been blooming since 5/13/22—YES, almost 11 months, in three or four waves. Currently, it has six perfect little flowers and one unopened bud. I’m already getting a little sad worrying about how long it will take it to bloom again once these flowers fall, but I’m trying not to worry. Maybe some of my other plants will pony up blooms in the meantime (they are younger and less-consistent performers).

    There have been lots of great musical suggestions here. All through the pandemic (yes, it’s still going on/it’s not over no matter how much we wish it to be), I have listened to the original cast recording of The Band’s Visit whenever I-just-can’t-even-anymore (which is, sadly, *a lot* of the time). It’s all beautiful; but, in particular, “Welcome to Nowhere” and “Papi Hears the Ocean” are *funny* and catchy. Also, “Something Different” includes the line “Nothing is as beautiful as something that you don’t expect.” Oh, just listen to the whole thing—it’s amazing.

    I’m pretty sure I’m safe in saying that Lizzo and I love you right back! Sending you all the best vibes. XO —Debby

  55. I suggest as a happy song, Keep your Head Up by Andy Grammer. Helped me through some darker times.

  56. Ugh. Comments hate me. Take twenty-six, so you’re getting two songs. Count on Me by Bruno Mars and Somewhere Over the Rainbow/Wonderful World by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole. Instant calm.

  57. Jake Wesley Rogers, “pluto” “hindsight” “dark bird”

  58. We’ve had really weird weather in Texas, so maybe your tree is just now managing to get some blooms out. You may have missed some, but you got to see this one!

  59. OK, trying again. I like Bad Day by Daniel Powter, Mamma Mia by Abba, Let the River Run by Carly Simon, most of Straight No Chaser. I think those would be ok. Ketamine has its own thing, for sure.

  60. Hmm. Well there’s a South African artist who goes by The Kiffness who might be worth listening to just because of how he creates his music. He uses recordings of cats or dogs and other “found” sounds and then builds a song around them. They’re funny and charming and I think you need to hear the! They always make me smile.

  61. When I’m going through a tough time the song SUPERBLOOM by Misterwives is a wonderful mood booster. The album of the same name has a few other great songs to help me keep going as well!

  62. My go-to is “To Noise-Making” by Hozier, but it gets a little garbly (cause, you know, noise-making, it clears up at the end), the whole album “Let the Rain Fall” by Good Lovelies (Andrews Sisters vibes), and Smash Mouth’s “All Star” but mostly because at the second verse I do “Well, the years start coming and they don’t stop coming AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING” until the song changes or someone physically stops me, which may or may not be a good pick for this situation.

  63. My go-to is “To Noise-Making” by Hozier, but it gets a little garbly (cause, you know, noise-making, it clears up at the end), the whole album “Let the Rain Fall” by Good Lovelies (Andrews Sisters vibes), and Smash Mouth’s “All Star” but mostly because at the second verse I do “Well, the years start coming and they don’t stop coming AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING” until the song changes or someone physically stops me, which may or may not be a good pick for this situation.

  64. These are some of my faves in the positive/happy/upbeats category.
    Good Luck!

    “Way Less Sad” – AJR
    “Friends” – Flight of the Conchords
    “The Lotto” – Ingrid Michaelson
    “Secrets” – Mary Lambert (YOU are the one that introduced this one to me)
    “Rider’s Lullaby” – Jessie Mueller
    “F**ckin’ Perfect” – P!nk
    “OK, All Right” – David Archuleta
    “Anything You Can Do” – Bernadette Peter’s
    “I Punched Keanu Reeves” – Hello Peril
    “Sweet Caroline” – DJ Otzi
    “The Gates” – Da Vinci’s Notebook
    “The Hamilton Polka” – Weird Al
    “Why Does The Sun Shine?” – They Might Be Giants
    “Dogs Like Socks” – Psychstick
    “Get it Girl, You Go” – Laura Bell Bundy
    “Hardware Store” – Weird Al
    “I’ve Got no more … To Give” – Thomas Benjamin Wild
    “Jack Sparrow” – The Lonely Island
    “World’s Smallest Violin” – AJR

  65. I love to listen to Flogging Molly and Gaelic Storm. After listening to massage music all day, I need something a little less sleep inducing

  66. Then Came the Morning by Lone Bellow
    Right On Time by Brandi Carlisle
    We Should Be Friends by Miranda Lambert
    Soul by Lee Brice
    You Are So Beautiful by Joe Cocker
    You Shine by Andrew Simple

    I hope you feel better.

  67. I don’t know if it would help you, or bounce you into oddness, but I have always found that “Mr. Blue Sky”, by ELO, puts me in a much better mindset.

  68. Here’s my “Sunday Morning Bouncy” YouTube playlist which is, for the most part, super happy (also a YouTube playlist because…I am old I guess….)

  69. My ketamine playlist was constantly evolving through my treatments and boosters but I really liked using movie scores. This is its current incarnation and includes tracks with personal connections but I will warn you it has the stranger things mix of Journey’s separate ways (I threw it in to experiment as the song is has a happy memory from growing up, and found it wasn’t scary for me) Only the first 17 or so play during my sessions but all the others are tracks I’ve tried or keep on the list to maybe try in the future.

  70. I have a one hour happy song playlist on my Spotify – these are all guaranteed mood-helpers for me, although I’m sure some songs won’t work for your ketamine trips 🙂 I just made it public so anyone who wants to can check it out

  71. My ketamine doctor will only do the treatment if you do six initial sessions in 2-3 weeks. Medically it works much better. Maybe ask about that?

  72. I always smile when I hear “Next to Me” by Emeli Sande, “2 Be Loved” by Lizzo, and “Escapade” by Janet Jackson. (Getting to see so many great music recommendations is a highlight of my week!) Take care, Jenny.

  73. I second Freedom by Jon Batiste and Rhythm of the Saints (in its entirety!) by Paul Simon. I’ve found that when the ability to awe creeps back in, it’s an excellent sign that the incessant mental gloom is lifting. Much love to you! You’re books and blog have helped me more than I could ever express and I’m so grateful for you and your take on life. 😘

  74. Happy Songs: “I’m Coming Out” by Diana Ross, “September” by Earth, Wind and Fire, “Land of 1000 Dances” by Aaron Neville, “Everlasting Love” by Love Affair. I hope at least one of those works/helps <3

  75. First thing that pops up in my mind is “I just wanna shine” by Fitz & the Tantrums. It definitely reinforces positive mental thinking but, ofc, that could sometimes be annoying when you’re just not ready for that. But maybe you are since you noticed the blooms.

  76. You Can Call Me Al, Friday I’m in Love, Truth Hurts, Pocket Calculator, In the Hall of the Mountain King, For Boston, Blister in the Sun, oh and EVERYTHING IS by Neutral Milk Hotel. Definitely that last one!

  77. 5 out of 6 by Dessa
    Smells like Teen Spirit, Nirvana
    Aquarius, 5th Dimension
    Kodachrome, Paul Simon
    Shiny, Happy People, REM

  78. Fresh Feeling – Eels
    I believe in a thing called love – The Darkness
    You make my dreams come true – Hall and Oats
    Too high – Stevie Wonder
    Salty Dog – Flogging Molly
    The Middle – Jimmy Eat World
    A place in the sun – Stevie Wonder
    Tightrope – Janelle Monae

  79. I love listening to kpop songs. New Jeans and IVE have some really great upbeat songs.

  80. Mr Blue Sky, Treat People With Kindness by Harry Styles, Groove Is In the Heart, listen to the music by the doobie brothers

  81. Tilted by Christine and the Queens
    Wonder of Birds by Innocence Mission
    Shake It Out by Florence + The Machine
    Stay High by Brittany Howard
    This is Me by Kesha
    Love and Anger by Kate Bush

  82. Oh! The song used as the theme in “Moone Boy” is definitely a happy pill: Where’s Me Jumper? by Sultans of Ping FC

  83. My go-to mood booster song is All Night by Icona Pop. Add Dynamite and Permission to dance by BTS. If you don’t mind not understanding the language, I have other BTS songs to suggest. I’m deep into Thai BLs so Smile Please, You’ve got my back and Sweet and Naughty are OST from some series. I hope one of these make your final cut!!!

  84. Just remember it’s just the last one right now. There will be others. Try Deja Vu by Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. It’s lyrical and beautiful.

  85. Some of my happy songs:
    -C’mon People (We’re Making It Now) by Richard Ashcroft
    -Things Can Only Get Better by Howard Jones
    -Happyment by Komeda
    -Breakout by Swing Out Sister
    -Hey Ya! by Outkast
    -Aquarius/Let The Sunshine In by The 5th Dimension
    -Think About Things by Dadi Freyr

  86. You recognized the beauty of a magnolia bloom. That’s fucking awesome, and it’s definitely a sign there is light at the end of the tunnel. Wish I could offer some happy music, but I only listen to angry music, so I can’t be of any help.

  87. Songs that make me happy: Regina Spektor, On the Radio, Us; KT Tunstall, Black Horse and the Cherry Tree, Hold On; Kate Bush, Sensual World, Hounds of Love, Big Sky, Rubberband Girl. It isn’t a song, but Aaron Copland’s Fanfare for the Common Man always gives me a lift.

  88. You want freaking happy music? You’ve got it! I’m not sure if the albums I’ve listed are psychedelic approved, but these are in the happy music stratosphere.

    Ska music is typically the answer for me in this department.

    I started to listen to ska along with pop punk circa 1998-2002 at underage clubs in sun-bleached Orange County in Socal (I graduated high school in 2002 if that’s any indication). I was a massively huge nerd… (obviously) who came from a majorly messed up family and needed to belong somewhere. Music and my friends were the answer. That’s when I discovered ska, punk, pop punk, etc.

    Listening to Reel Big Fish (then and now) especially helps me when I’m in a metaphorical hole, and is touchstone that reminds me that I’ll get through whatever the fuck life throws at me just as I did before. RBF makes me laugh, and although some of the song material can be dark, the sunny horn section always bites back.. reminding me to “Cheer Up” much like one of RBF’s best records.

    Here’s a listen if you’re so inclined:

    Reel Big Fish must records to start:

    “Cheer Up”
    “Turn the Radio off”
    “Everything Sucks”

    If you like RBF you will love Save Ferris. Album to start:
    “It Means Everything”

    Lastly Five Iron Frenzy is also a favorite of mine. FYI They’re a Christian ska band, but they are legitimately very good and strange. They even write a silly/funny song about Canada!

    Album to start from Five Iron Frenzy:

    “Our Newest Album Ever!”

  89. Listen to some Barenaked Ladies. Hard not to be happy with them. I recommend the old stuff like the Gordon album.

  90. Here Comes the Sun – Beatles
    Don’t Worry Be Happy – Bobby McFerrin
    One – from chorus line, ,
    other music from musicals (the happy songs)
    Oklahoma!, I’m just a girl who can’t say no, Everything’s up to date in kansas city…
    Consider yourself at home…
    The Hills are Alive (sound of music) – i am 16 going on 17, my favorite things,
    A funny thing happened on the way to the forum
    yellow submarine – beatles
    Come Fly with me – frank sinatra
    Fly me to the moon – frank s.
    New York, new york – frank
    baubles, bangles, beads – frank
    You make me feel so young – frank

    hope these help

  91. “Break my Stride” by Matthew Wilder
    “Keeping the Faith” by Billy Joel, “Dancing in the Moonlight,” King Harvest, “Wild Honey” The Beach Boys, “Vacation”, the GoGos, “Lucky Ladybug” The Four Seasons…. I’m a classic rock geek…. I could go on for a while…

  92. Can someone please add all these to a playlist?

    My suggestion is Mika. His song lollipop makes me happy.

  93. Make as well dance – Jason Miraz
    Following the sun- SuperHi x Neeka
    Cover me in sunshine – Pink

    Love your blog. Good luck

  94. “Doing the Unstuck” by the Cure and “Sing Your Life” by Morrissey (even if he is a Tory now).

  95. this my playlist i keep all my ‘pickmeup’…. towards the middle is music

  96. I love you Jenny, and am pulling for you to get better. I hope that you can hang on to some wonderful memory that will keep you grounded during your excursions. Never doubt that you’re going make it out of the mirror universes and back into a better reality! Sending hugs and prayers! ❤️

  97. Texas magnolias bloom whenever the hell they want to. Whenever they feel like it. Honestly, your tree probably knew you were ready to notice it and rewarded you. Give the tree a hug and tell it how well it did and how it made your day better and brighter. I bet it will continue to show off for you.

    (I love this. ~ Jenny)

  98. My happy song – Its Gonna Be OK, Piano Guys –

    “And there is a battle raging in your heart,
    But you must win.
    It comes for all of us,
    saying we are not enough.
    So fight for your life, the world’s gonna try,
    To sell you some lies.”

    Good lyrics to listen to.

    A-M on comment 60- absolutely yes on anything by Pink Martini. They have the best Christmas album. But my fav happy songs of theirs are Hang on Little Tomato and Lilly. I could listen to Lilly for hours.

    Allie on comment 26 – if you want to know what the Wellerman is about –

    I agree it’s a really catchy sound – but I wouldn’t pay too much attention to the lyrics, really. When my kiddo was playing it non-stop I explained the lyrics to her and after a descriptive car ride detailing whaling she doesn’t ask to listen to it anymore.

  99. OK, I have a playlist I call Sunshiney, with songs that always put a smile on my face:
    Jump in the Line – Harry Belafonte
    Don’t stop me Now – Queen
    Mayor of Simpleton – XTC
    Swords of a Thousand Men – Tenpole Tudor
    Starman – David Bowie
    That’s What’s Up – Edward Share & The Magnetic Zeros
    25 Miles – Edwin Starr
    Soul Shakedown Party – Bob Marley & The Wailers
    You Can Get it If You Really Want – Jimmy Cliff
    Poi E – Patea Maori Club (best heard while watching the end credits scene from Boy )
    Happy – C2C
    I Need You – Jon Batiste

    Hope some of them make you smile a bit <3

  100. T Swift – most of the Lover album
    Whitney Houston – I Wanna Dance with Somebody
    Beatles – early years are less trippy
    Dua Lipa – Tiny Desk Concert set
    Scissor Sisters – I Don’t Feel Like Dancing
    Temptations – My Girl, Just my Imagination
    Hot Chocolate – You Sexy Thing
    Groovejet – Sophie Ellis-Bextor
    Outkast – Hey Ya!
    The Remembrandts – I’ll be there for you!

    Sending you some good vibes …

    Beach Boys – Good Vibrations?

  101. I have a “fun songs” playlist on spotify that I use for the dentist. I am absolutely terrified of the dentist, so much so that I take Xanax before leaving home (he’s 6 blocks away), bring my headphones, get gas (for cleanings, too) and basically put myself in another place. My dentist totally understands and I’ve been going to himn for over 30 years. Here is my list, over :
    Hope you like it. There are 162 songs on it!

  102. I went to Zanzibar once. It was cool. I’m glad you found the flower. It’s lovely. *heart*

  103. Katrina and the Waves – Walking on Sunshine
    Barry Manilow – A Very Strange Medley
    Bob Marley and the Wailers – Three Little Birds
    REM – Shiny Happy People
    ELO – Mr. Blue Sky
    Queen – Don’t Stop Me Now
    Beach Boys – Good Vibrations

  104. I just recently binged “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” and think “Let’s Generalize Men” is a hoot. Does funny count the same as happy? (It’s better if you watch the video.) Wishing you all the best with your ketamine treatment. Deep depression sucks. Hugs!

  105. Have you listened to Andy Grammar’s album The Art of Joy? Lots of positive upbeat stuff.

  106. Hello My K-Sister! I too am treating with K infusions. I choose music to match my intention…so I chose STRENGTH as my intention the last time and searched YouTube for “Ancient Egyptian Temple Music”. Sure enough, the whoosh took me to the Eternal Nile where Sekhmet (lion headed goddess) called me her child and delivered messages of strength directly from my subconscious. That was my best session ever. Girl, you gotta fly that plane yourself! You say,”imposter syndrome”? I say set THE OSCARS as your intention and give yourself an Oscar!❤️

  107. I love that others recommended the B-52s. They really have such a joyful vibe! Especially their album Bouncing Off The Satellites. While tripping, fun songs might be Wig, She Breaks For Rainbows, and Nude Beach. Detour Through Your Mind is fantastic fun, but probably best to listen to it while sober, because you will feel like you’re on drugs! Other gentle feel-good songs: I Hear The Country Calling Me – Luscious Jackson; Calling All Angels – Jane Siberry and k.d.lang; all of lang’s Ingenue album is just gorgeous; Don’t You Worry ‘Bout A Thing – Stevie Wonder.

  108. I think it really depends on what variety Magnolia you have (there are like 10). I’m in Fort Worth. Our Little Gem Magnolias don’t start blooming until April-May and continue through the summer as long as they’re watered and it’s not 115 degrees. You might still be seeing the first bloom on your tree. ❤️

  109. “Oh My My” and “I Hope You’re Happy” (both by Blue October).

  110. I’ve seen a lot of suggestions that I want to look at, so I’d like to add my thanks for folks reaching out and sharing.

    For some reason, Billie Joel’s Zanzibar make me think of Jim Croce “I’ve got a name” a song about “moving ahead so life won’t pass me by”.

    Also, another vote for Walking on Sunshine!

  111. Maybe the Eurovision playlist? The songs are usually pretty catchy. And if the songs have words but not in English, maybe that’s helpful?

  112. Wow, that was my experience with ketamine infusions too! I ended up with a really eclectic mix but it worked. Simon and Garfunkel, Cher, a couple of versions of Hallelujah, because I love that song.I forget the playlist but I recall what was important to me was songs that reminded me of people and my life. I thought it was ironic because originally I had a great playlist of classical music but you’re right, I too needed words to remind me that I was real and not part of the hallucination.

  113. The Justin Timberlake Sunshine In My Pocket song is just a great happy thing.
    Shake Me by Mint Royale
    Lots of B52’s
    Would Weird Al be too trippy?
    Groove *Is* In The Heart
    OK Go, especially Here It Goes Again
    Pink Floyd Learning To Fly, if it’s not too close to the mark
    James Brown I Feel Good
    I personally love mashups, and Hella Dare You To Smoke remains one of my favorites. But check out of a few of DJ Cummerbund’s and Bill McClintock’s.

  114. Music Suggestion: Hey Ya by Outkast. No matter what my mood is like, this song literally gets me dancing. Hope you better soon!

  115. I’m really liking the Trio albums by Dolly, Emmylou Harris, and Linda Ronstadt. Even the heartbreak songs are somehow uplifting, and you can sing along with the harmonies!

  116. My neighbor’s gorgeous magnolia is just starting to bloom here in San Marcos, so everything in its own time, which here in Texas means whenever it fucking wants to bloom, or freeze, or just give up like most plants in my yard.

  117. Let me recommend Essas Emocoes by Zeca Baleiro. It’s in portuguese so you probably won’t understand it. But it is one happy tune. Google translates it thusly:

    No matter the night
    Anyway we’re going to play
    Prepare your hearts
    For these emotions
    What I bring from Ashixá T
    he important thing is that I arrived now
    Cheerful as always happy to sing
    Sing with me my love
    Dance with me
    Balance my cord
    I know you’ll like it
    I want to see the crazy wind swinging your hair

    Oh it comes out better when a native speaker translates it:

  118. You Can Call Me Al by Paul Simon, but so many of his songs are great and uplifting.

  119. Meaghan Farrell – Just Me
    Michael Franti – I’m Alive
    Xavier Rudd – Follow the Sun
    Nahko – Goodnight Sun

  120. Cows with Guns, Dana Lyon. I’ll never find another you, The Seekers. Accidentally Kelly Street, Frente!. Ivy, Grace Petrie. Wintergreen, The East Pointers. The Outdoor Type, the Lemonheads. I’m on my way, The Proclaimers. Cattle and Cane, The Go-betweens. Sisters are doing it for themselves, The Eurythmics. I am Woman, Helen Reddy. The theme song from Gillian’s Island. ….. oh my stars I am giving my counsellor a field day here ….

  121. Also, pretty well anything by They Might Be Giants – but if you want to sing along, I’d start with Istanbul (not Constantinople).

  122. How about Feel Again by OneRepublic? And it’s a good sign you noticed. First…last…it doesn’t matter, you saw something beautiful.

  123. Playlist suggestions:

    “Make a Little Birdhouse in Your Soul” and “Istanbul (Not Constantinople)” both by They Might Be Giants.

    “Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World” by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole

    “Fields of Gold” by Eva Cassidy

    “Dream a Little Dream of Me” by Ella Fitzgerald/Louis Armstrong (Anything by Ella or Louis, for real)

    “A Kiss to Build a Dream On” by Steve Tyrell

    “Shape I’m In” by Arc Angels

    You got this, Jenny. Keep on going.

  124. SO glad you’re starting to feel better, and also I hope you share your new happy songs playlist!

  125. I’m trying to do a better job managing my mood, and music really helps. I’ve added a few more from other’s suggestions here too! Here are some more positive songs I’ve been listening to lately…
    Be Kind – Zak Abel
    Good Morning – Max Frost
    Freedom – Jon Batiste (the video is great)
    The Best Day – Atmosphere
    Purple Hat – Sofi Tukker (although may be too trippy while tripping!)
    Touches You – Mika (all of their songs, really)
    Cake by the Ocean – DNCE
    Someday Baby – R.L. Burnside
    I Love It – Icona Pop
    Its Not Me, It’s you – Lily Allen
    Sound of Sunshine – Michael Franti
    Dance Off – Macklemore & Idris Elba (also Thrift Shop, Downtown…)

  126. I say Float on by Modest Mouse and The Globe by Big Audio Dynamite, in case you need your playlist again!

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