So, it comes as a surprise to no one that I broke down and bought myself the giant panda suit. Except Victor. It was a surprise to him. Not a pleasant one. Probably because he was upset I didn’t buy one for him too. Or maybe it was because he wasn’t expecting an enormous panda to leap out at him, snarling furiously in the middle of his morning conference call.
But this is the kind of thing you have to expect when you work from home. Victor says having your wife run screaming into your office dressed as a giant panda at 9:00 in the morning is something no one should ever have expect and I pointed out that unexpected pandas are good practice for when you have a home invasion because if you aren’t rattled by spontaneous pandas then you’re probably going to be able to keep your cool during the zombie apocalypse. If anything, this was like a safety drill. One that he failed. We’ve agreed to disagree on this.
I wanted to give you pictures but Victor has pushed a bookshelf in front of his door so I had to take all of these myself with my computer camera. I call these “Blogging with Dignity: The Spontaneous Panda Series”.
What’s weird is that if you darken and crop this I look a *lot* like the Virgin Mary when she’s very disappointed in you. So logically speaking, when it’s not darkened and cropped I look like the Virgin Mary in a panda suit. So now you know what that looks like.
I think the moral of this story is that everyone should own a panda suit because they’re awesome and very warm. Victor says the moral is that he’s calling a locksmith to install a deadbolt on his office door. I think maybe Victor doesn’t understand what a “moral” is.
PS. I’m still really disappointed that the flying squirrel costume was sold out but my friend Jon made me this as a consolation prize:
And now I’m sad again. Also, I can’t stop singing the panda song.
It’s probably good that I work from home.