UPDATED: Leg Three!

Updated:  The Chicago stop sold out so they’re adding another one.  I’ll have details soon.

Leg three of my book tour starts in a few weeks and I have nothing witty to say here.

Leg three
But in spite of my lack of witticisms I would LOVE it if you’d come to see me on my last week on the road.  Here’s where I’ll be in two weeks:

Wednesday, June 6 at 7pm ~ Montclair, NJ

Thursday, June 7th ~ Blogworld NY

Friday, June 8th at 7pm ~ Brookline, MA

Sunday, June 10th at 2pm ~ Chicago, IL

**********

In non-related news, my friend (Kara) knit me a Gryffindor scarf for Ron Weasely.  And he also got a red wig.

A ridiculous, ridiculous red wig.

It might need trimming for historical accuracy.

IMG_2465

**********

Still nothing witty to add.  I apologize.  I’m not quite myself today.  I blame Ron Weasely’s wig.  To make it up to you I’m giving away a few copies of the Australian, UK  and audio versions of my book.  Just leave a comment telling me which one you want, y’all.

1,117 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Not yourself today? Is there just one version of you we’re supposed to have??? I’m going to have an audio book one day regardless of if you send it to me or if I use my own damn gumption to get it. Have a wonderful Wednesday lovely lady!

    Like

  2. I wish your tour were swinging closer. I’ll keep my eye out!

    Like

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  3. I would love the UK version. I have the ebook and love it!!! By the way, when I was a kid my mom also made us wear breadbags over our shoes, but only when it snowed. I know, crazy, right?

    Like

  4. AUDIO! AUDIO! AUDIO! I can’t read while I’ve got the laughter-tears streaming down my face!

    Like

  5. It is acceptable to have days of non wittyness! We do not see it as a poor reflection on you as a person.

    Like

    Sweety Darlin recently posted I wanna trade pink hard hats and work boots for heals and skirts!.

  6. Australian. I want to hear about squirrel corpse puppets in an Australian voice.. in my head. K, thanks.

    Like

    Rebekah recently posted Girl's Night (because it's just me).

  7. I love all things British so I’d take the UK version.

    And holy cow…I’m already setting up child care so my friend & I can road trip and see you in Montclair.

    Like

    Jennifer @ Also Known As...the Wife recently posted The Military & My Marriage: Difficult Choices.

  8. OH dear god…Ron Weasely looks like Carrot Top.

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  9. Glad to see Ron is rocking the crimped hair. Represent the 80’s proudly dear weasel!

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  10. Still no Seattle. DRAT!

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  11. 11
    BdoubleOM

    Fear not, dearest Bloggess, you need not be pithy every moment of every day. That would just become tired and unbelievable. You rock, regardless of your updating status. And if I had my druthers, I’d choose the UK version, if that is an option. Don’t feel like you have to send it. Just if you wanna…

    Like

  12. I would very much love an audiobook version. Also, please come to Nashville. Please?

    Like

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  13. I would love the UK version!!!

    Like

    Heather recently posted KROD May 2012: Edwin sings Europe!.

  14. Oh, Any version would be AWESOME!!! What’s the rest of the tour look like?

    Like

  15. Audio book! Already read the book but I want to hear you tell the stories!

    Like

    Karen @ Books Beside My Bed recently posted Shadows on the Moon by Zoë Marriott.

  16. Audio! :) Hope you’re back to feeling more like yourself soon, Jenny!

    Like

    L-Kat recently posted The post where I (the terminally single one) give advice to future brides.

  17. That wig is fucking serious, man.

    Like

  18. audio, audio, audio! The only thing better than this book would be you reading it! :)

    Like

  19. 19
    Shiloh walker

    Oh, that’s cute. I love the little doll in the right back hand corner

    Like

    Shiloh walker recently posted A rather lovely post about the Hunter books…and Netgalley news.

  20. UK version sounds swell :)

    Like

    Cheryl Harrison recently posted Upcoming Central Ohio Homebrewing Competitions.

  21. The wig just made me spit diet coke. I needed that. Thanks!

    Like

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  22. UK version, please. :)
    Hope you’re feeling yourself soon…as opposed to going round feeling up other people…’cause if they didn’t consent then it becomes a bit tricky for you…
    …just ask first, K?

    Like

    Claire J recently posted Postcard from Prague.

  23. 23
    meaniemariska

    UK! I’ve already had to order 3 copies of your book for family members. :)

    Like

  24. I would love an audio book!

    Like

  25. So excited about Boston! (Brookline, whatever)

    Like

  26. It’s like Carrot Top and Ron Weasley somehow conceived a rodent love child with an affinity for 80s hair bands.

    Oh…and I’d love the audio version!

    Like

    Katrina recently posted Produce Anxiety.

  27. I always look forward to reading your blog during the day. It’s like that ray of sunshine you wait for after the terrible down pour of reality. I would love the audio book. I have a 16 month old son and by the time I attempt to read at night I am so completely exhausted that my eyes can’t even stay propped up. I have an hour commute every day and listening to your book would make that drive a happy trails adventure with all my imaginary car poolers.

    Like

  28. 28
    Jennifer Shrader

    UK version. You rock!

    Like

  29. Audio, please! You are a genius – woman!!!!! ;)

    Like

  30. Hope you feel better soon! And I wish you’d come back to LA. I couldn’t make your signing when you came out here. I was working that night. :(

    I’d love to toss my hat in the ring for the audio book!

    <3,
    -J

    Like

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  31. Ron looks like one of Ron & Hermonie’s kids.

    Like

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  32. I would adore an audio copy of your book. I have been reading parts of your book to my friends and family so it would be amazing to hear it in your voice! :)

    Like

  33. Audio! I have the book, but I so want to have you read it to me! Plus, OUT TAKES! I’ll end up buying it if I don’t win it. Either way, I must hear it!

    Like

  34. I’m still waiting for you to announce your Canadian tour :D

    Like

  35. Oh Jenny, you just posted a photo of a Ron Weasely wearing some kind of 80s hair metal wig, you may be tired and wrung out but you are still totally you.

    I wouldn’t say no to the Aus version but (and I feel like a cruel bitch asking this of you when you are clearly exhausted from being on the road…) I would much rather see you in person in Toronto. Pretty please…you can sleep through it and I’ll do the reading pretending to be you…and everyone would buy you donuts from Tim Hortons. Though I guess since I’d be doing the reading and everyone would think I was you, and think that the real you was just some narcoleptic fan then I would be getting the donuts, but I would share.

    I don’t think I’m quite myself today either.

    Like

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  36. Yee-haw, here’s to Texas and books!

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  37. I would LOVE a UK version of your book! Just to hear it in an English accent would be so amazingly hilarious! And I love Ron’s wig. he should have rocked that look in the movie. <3

    Like

  38. I’d LOVE the UK version! :)

    Like

  39. Audio! Please so I can listen in my car and laugh my ass off while the folks next to me stare and think I’m insane!

    Like

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  40. It may be the weather. I find that it the weather sucks my creativity dry, like some sort of creativity sucking vampire, only it’s the weather and I’m me. Anyhow, I’d take an audio version, because I already have it in awesome book format, if I were to win (which is highly unlikely due to my rather remarkable skill at losing). YAY! RAMBLY!

    Like

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  41. I would love the audio. You must do something with Ron’s hair.

    Like

  42. I still see no Pittsburgh stop. Ridonkulous.

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    Jim W. recently posted Walk Day!.

  43. UK!

    Like

  44. Who cares what version it is? I just have to get my hands on it. Hope you get to feeling better

    Like

    emily recently posted Fifteen choices for Fifty.

  45. Just starting the book… Makes me laugh in that evil genius kind of way!!!

    Like

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  46. I would love the audio version because it’s hard to read on my phone while I’ve got a glass of wine in one hand & I’m chasing the toddler (who causes me to need wine) around the house!!!

    Like

    Stephanie recently posted Omelette aux Fines Herbes.

  47. I’d love the audiobook, but either one would be awesome.

    In any case, how about going back home from Chicago going through Kansas City and Oklahoma? I just added OK to bribe you, since Dr Pants are there. But of course I can offer you something special here in Kansas, of course.

    Like

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  48. Love Love the cover art on the UK version! Chin up, dearie (that was my best brit type-ccent!). xoxox

    Like

  49. Ooh, audio please! I’m on the hold list at my library, but they haven’t even purchased it yet, alas.

    Ron Weasely looks very dashing with his new accoutrements!

    Like

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  50. Ron Weasely is looking a little Herminone-weasely in that wig, yo. I’d love a UK version of your book for my British ex-pat hubz, who sadly did not go to Hogwarts.

    Like

  51. i would LOVE an audio copy of your book. even though you aren’t feeling yourself you are still awesome ;) good luck on the third leg of your tour!

    oh and the wig kinda makes ron weasely look like he is trying to be in an 80s rock/hair band. just saying :D

    Like

  52. UK version please!!! The cover is so pretty! And, Ron Weasely’s wig is enough to make anyone have an off day :)

    Like

  53. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaudio!

    I missed you when you were in MD because my ankle won’t let me drive for more than 20 minutes right now (sprained it roller skating) but I heard you were hilarious and the only problem was that it should have been longer ;)

    Like

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  54. You have three legs! Amazeballs! If you get a fourth one, could it be in the UK? Ok thanks.

    Like

  55. 55
    Melissa Barnum

    PLEASE come to Seattle!!!! :) Ron is rockin’ the Carrot Top look fur sure! ;)

    Like

  56. I want to read the Aussie version and find out if goats get switched to dingos and if it’s Stanley, the Magic Wallaby instead.

    Like

  57. Noooooo…Chicago is so close to Minneapolis, yet so far…

    Like

    Jess recently posted Sluts and Harlots: The Moms Need Feminist Education.

  58. Audio version PLEASE!

    Like

  59. AUDIO! i have the book and reading along with you would be tremendous. :)

    Like

    hello haha narf recently posted WP.

  60. Pick up 30 cases of self tanner while in Montclair. Because in New Jersey, the rivers run bronze!
    But I’m pretty sure that’s only due to all of the dead guidos dumped in them.

    Like

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  61. Fell Better- I’m sure you are exhusted! We all love what you are doing fo us- Going all over the country so your crazy fans can have you sign prescription bottles, boobs, have 911 called (Dallas, cough, cough)!

    UK Audio Version Please :)
    (Wouldnt it be great if you did it all in your worst English accent! ha)

    Like

  62. Audioooooo! Please. And now I have to figure out how to get to Boston in June. I’m thinking you’ll still be too far away for this time of year (end of school). Western NY. Western NY. Western NY. Please?

    Like

    heidi recently posted Photo A Day May.

  63. I’d still like an audio, and the center part in that red wig is very chic. I will TRY to get to Brookline. To bring my book that’s already signed. So you can add punctuation, or a smiley face, or bitemarks, or something…

    Like

    Stephanie recently posted Greeting Cards for the Domestically Confined.

  64. 64
    rdbabygrl

    Audio! The book was hilarious!

    Like

  65. I would love an audio book!

    Like

  66. I will gladly trim your weasel’s wig for you. <— Man if I had a nickel for every time I said that! I'd have like, 5 cents.

    Does your Aussie audiobook have you doing an Australian accent? Because I would put ALL the shrimps on the barbie for that awesomeness.

    Like

    Suzanne recently posted Cinnamon Rolls.

  67. I would LOVE an audio copy. I pre-ordered the print version, laughed until I peed while reading it, then laughed even harder at your signing in Atlanta.
    Not that you would remember but you signed my Copernicus shirt and you kindly told me I am photogenic. But really, you are the beautiful one….inside and out!
    Thank you for this blog…the offer of your sudio version has prompted me to come out of lurk-dom and make my first comment.

    Like

  68. 68
    Leigh Parlier

    audio please! :)

    Like

  69. ANY VERSION FOR ME, PLEASE!!!

    And I am highly dissappointed that Orlando is STILL not part of your book tour. We aren’t THAT far from TX, you know….

    Like

  70. UK

    Like

  71. I blame Ron’s wig as well. Perhaps a potion class has gone awry. Or maybe he’s been caught trying on Ermione’s wig. Perhaps he’s questioning some of his life choices. Maybe he’s just a little overwhelmed and a giant red wig is his version of a red dress.

    Some days are giant red wig days.

    (Also, UK version for the purdy.)

    Like

    Miss D recently posted And sometimes, I wish I were Catholic..

  72. 72
    Debby Phillips

    I would love to hear your tome read to me in your dulcet tones.

    Like

  73. Got the print, need the audio!

    Like

  74. You so need to come to Ohio! Until then I guess an audio book could keep me company. :)

    Like

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  75. As a friend noted: it’s like Molly Weasley had an affair with Dee Snider.

    Audio if I win :-)

    Like

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  76. Chicago …. That’s getting closer to Minnesota :) so I still have hope! I’d love a chance for audio version of your book :)

    Like

  77. Audio s’il vous plait. I guess there’s no chance your tour will hit the far north in Canada? I’d send you a stuffed moose or black bear to encourage a visit but where would you put it? Wouldn’t want to overshadow Beyonce… and also I imagine the shipping costs would be prohibitive. Thanks for your book!
    (we call our vultures “mosquitos” up here. they are the same size, look it up, it’s true, I swear)
    Tracy

    Like

  78. WOOHOO East Coast!!!

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  79. I got all excited because I thought that said, ‘Three Legs.’

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  80. Audio, please! It’s the least you can do for not coming to San Diego!!! =)

    Like

  81. Oh. No. Ron Weasely IS Aubrey O’Day OR Pippi Longstocking without the braids. I need consider this over a shot of vodka. Either way – genius.

    Like

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  82. OOh, I can haz audio version? Also, I very much appreciate knowing what Ron Weasley would look like as a hippy, uh, weasel.

    Like

  83. 84
    Dana Frank

    Please give Ron a haircut. He’s dangerously close to being mistaken for Carrot Top.
    Oh, and if I’m the lucky winner, winner, chicken dinner, i wouldst greatly appreciate the Audio Book.
    I’m pretty sure I have your voice in my head, I just wanna do a cross check for verification.

    Like

  84. UK please. I hope you have a fun time in the New England area. The weather up here is rather fickle so you might want to bring shorts for one day and then a snow jacket for the next. :) So far it’s been grand outside, but I’m used to the mild weather.
    -Red

    Like

  85. Audio, pleeeeez!

    Like

  86. For some reason I interpreted that as if you had made UK and Australian audiobook versions of your book, presumably with you recording it with a different fake accent for each. Not only did I think that was perfectly normal, but my first reaction was to wonder if you were planning on recording a Canadian version as well. How aboot it ,eh? So, yes, please send me a Canadian audiobook version.

    Like

  87. Audio please! Hearing you read it out loud would be all kinds of awesome. Though maybe not as much fun as hearing you read it out loud while watching your police escort try to keep a straight face was. That rocked sideways.

    Like

    FishyGirl recently posted A Beautiful Day Is Any Day You Hear A Favorite Author Speak.

  88. The uk version ! Im trying to make it to your book tour !!!

    Like

  89. Totally Audio so I can hear how awesome you were at pretending you were awesome at recording audio books :)

    Like

  90. I am reading the book right now. It is hilarious and difficult to find a stopping point! Good luck on the rest of your book tour. I am confident that you will think of funny things to say.

    Like

  91. Brookline? I might just have to take you up on that.

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  92. Audio version please!! PLEEEEASE!!

    Like

  93. I recently ordered your book online (the paper version in case there is a pole shift or an EMP or for some reason the world goes to hell, I will still be laughing) but I’d LOVE to hear the audio :)

    Like

  94. I’d like, love, adore, sleep with, make out with, any or all versions. Thank you.

    Like

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  95. Brookline! Yay!!!

    I think I’d like the audio book, too, even if I do find the UK cover of the book to be deliciously creepy, in an Edward Gorey kind of way (that’s not disparaging – I love me some Edward Gorey).

    Like

  96. I’d be happy with any of them, but if I really have to choose, the UK. Thank you so much for doing what you do, from bringing awareness to depression and anxiety to making people smile through all of your stories.

    Like

  97. Audio! I can laugh out loud at work and everyone will think I love my job!

    Like

  98. 99
    Ron Collins

    The audio version would be awesome, because then I could follow along in the book while you read it to me. In your own voice! (I’m still cracking up from the scam phone call I got regarding a “problem with the Windows computer”. The guy told me I could see the problem on screen with my own eyes! I asked him who else’s he thought I might use.)

    By the way, I have seen your book in the wild at a Chapters book store in Newfoundland, Canada. Just thought you’d like to know.

    Like

  99. 100
    Jennifer Uribe

    I would LOVE the audio book.

    I hope you feel better soon!

    Like

  100. Today, I won a MAJOR battle in my ongoing war with depression and anxiety. In addition to my parents, loved ones and doctors I also wanted to tell you, because you have been such a beacon of hope to me in this last year. You are inspiring, you are amazing, and you have given me strength when I needed it most. If you just wanted to put the cherry on this epic sundae of a day, I’d be thrilled with an audiobook or a UK version, but seriously, this day is already amazing. I now feel the need to make a taco medal for myself. Oh, PS, I’m the weirdo who gave you a taco medal in Houston ; )

    Like

  101. 102
    MissusMoose

    AUDIO! I sure do hope you get back to feelin’ like yourself really soon!!!! xoxox

    Like

  102. I would love to have an Australian copy of your book. I have my Kindle version, but there’s nothing like holding a real book in your hands…especially an Australian copy! It’d be a first for me. Thank you for writing and blogging. You’ve inspired me to continue on with my blogging; even if only a handful of friends and family read.

    Like

  103. UK version for sure. I have an Australian Boss that has turned me off to all Aussies. Probably for the rest of my life.

    Like

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  104. 105
    Michelle Bailey

    I do believe that Ron stole his wig from one of the Ronettes. (groan. I sincerely apologize for that.) Also, I would dearly love an audio copy of the book. I have read 3/4 of the book so far, and am saving the last little bit as a treat to myself.

    Like

  105. Ron’s fur is already red enough. I think the wig needs to go on Ermione.

    Like

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  106. Dang! I’m coming home from Chicago one day before you are there. Bummer. Come to Memphis, TN. We have a great independent bookstore called Burke’s Books (small place, but it’s cool & in my awesome neighborhood of Cooper-Young.) I can get you their info. if you like…just email me.
    Oh, I already have the audiobook, but if you were coming to town, I’d get a hard copy too just to meet you and have you sign it. :-D

    Like

  107. I would like anything, then I can say Jenny Lawson gave me something, something special!

    Like

  108. 109
    Abby Knoblauch

    Audio audio audio. When I was little, I used to say video video video really fast to my little brother who, for some reason, found it terrifying. He’s in his 30s now and laughs about it. Until I start doing it again. And then he asks me to stop.

    Try it: saying video over and over fast. It’s fun. It makes your mouth do fun things and it’s wildly annoying and distracting for those around you, which I see as a bonus.

    Like

  109. I don’t want one. What I DO want is a Tribe Jenny shirt. Or Bloggess Tribe. Or well.. I’m sure you get the picture. Now see? You’ve got a distraction. Back to your old self in no time.

    I genuflect in your general direction… (south west), Chief Jenny.

    Me like’um. Heap big.

    Later, Doll….

    Like

  110. Audio version, please! It would complement my print version oh so nicely! I almost said “video,” which then put the Kidd Video theme song into my head. Anyone remember Kidd Video? Back when Saturday mornings were the only time cartoons were on tv. Kidd was so cute, real and cartoon versions.

    Like

  111. Audio, please!! The wig is a nice thought, but it’s a bit of a beast. It’d get me down too. Have fun bringing your version of reality to the East Coast!!

    Like

  112. 113
    Amy Breshears

    Wish you were coming through Charlotte, NC! I would love to have a copy of the audio book.

    Like

  113. I’m still holding my breath and hoping you’ll completely lose your mind and come to Phoenix in Summer so I can meet you. That said I’d love a copy of the audio version. I wanna hear those outtakes!

    Like

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  114. UK version for me pretty please!! :D

    Hope you are feeling yourself soon. I understand how you feel….

    Like

  115. Any chance you’ll be coming to Canada??? Like to Toronto, Ottawa or Montreal? Pretty, pretty please!? (I can’t make it if it’s in Vancouver, BC ’cause that’s like a 7 hour plane ride away… Hubs says it’s too expensive… jerk.)

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  116. That is a pretty magnificent wig .. maybe Ronald Weasely is just channeling his inner Fabio. I’d love to get any of the print versions of your book! It looks beyond funny.

    Like

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  117. When I’m not feeling myself these days, I read your book. (So the audio version would double my options!)

    Like

  118. I SO want the UK version, because I love the curly letters on the front. Or the audiobook, because I want to hear you read it. Or the Australian version, because then I’d imagine you reading it in an Australian accent with Texan undertones. Any of those would make me ecstatic.

    A friend of mine recommended your blog to me a few months ago. It was hilarious. So I had to read every entry in order, starting with June 2007. I just got up to date. That same friend is waiting for me to do something for him, but I haven’t had time, since I’ve been working and, um, reading your blog. He has nobody to blame but himself, because he really should have known that this would happen.

    Like

  119. I would love to have the UK edition of your book. The cover is fantastic.
    Glad your tour is going well, and hope you feel more like yourself soon!

    Like

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  120. Hey – you could take the train (The City of New Orleans) straight down from Chicago. It’s an overnight trip…get a sleeper car and byob. Seriously…it’s kinda on your way back home…

    Like

  121. I would kill for an audio version! Not literally, of course, but if necessary I can be talked into all kinds of things! It was SO amazing hearing just that one chapter in your own voice in MD, and I totally already hear it in your voice in my own head. Which is ALMOST as much fun as having it, but not quite.

    Feel more like yourself (or somebody else, whatever floats your boat), get your relax on, and have an awesome time on your next leg!

    Like

  122. Chicago!!!! I can get to Chicago. But there is a stuffed lioness in a Ramada lobby here in Milwaukee that you really should see. PLUS the first diorama for natural history display is here too. The famed muskrat display. You must come to Milwaukee! In the name of taxidermy you must come to Milwaukee!

    Like

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  123. I’d love the UK version. I also cannot think of anything witty to say today. :)

    Like

  124. I’d love the UK version…pretty please with sugar on top!!

    p.s. Come to Fort Wayne, Indiana on your next tour!!! I can guarantee you that all the girls in my office will flock to see you! That’s 5 people–it’s all you need. Think about it…

    Like

  125. Audio book please. Though I’m not sure I will be able to handle what I imagine will be the pain in your voice while reading the dead babies chapter. I almost didn’t make it through.

    Like

    cassie recently posted wordless wednesday.

  126. 128
    Michelle

    AUDIO! Hearing you read the book will definitely help keep me awake on my long drive home after late classes!!!

    Like

  127. I’d love the UK or Australian version. Though audio would be cool, too. I’m not picky.

    Like

  128. YEAH, finally! So awesome, can’t wait! Hope you get some rest in between those legs! Wait, that didn’t sound right… ;)

    Like

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  129. I love the wig! But, uh, did your friend confuse Ron Weasely with CarrotTop because that is some serious hair action going on! I been dying to buy your book, so thank you for giving me something to read on the plane to our honeymoon!

    Like

  130. The audio version. So that I can share your book with my husband. Who won’t read a book to save his life. (But his drawings and sense of humor are crazy awesome!)

    Like

  131. I’d love an UK version, so I could read it with Ron Weseal-y accuracy.

    Like

  132. A. DAMN, no Denver
    B. Audio!

    Like

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  133. The red wig needs to go on Ermione!!!

    Like

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  134. Any version would be fantastic :)

    PS just got my tickets to see you in Chicago! Yay!

    Like

  135. I’d love the audiobook!

    Like

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  136. Aussie Aussie Aussie – Oi Oi Oi

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  137. 139
    Dolores Gonzalez

    Audio. Thanks!

    Like

  138. I would love one of the UK books! Are you going to try to find a tiny frog for Ron like he had on the train when he met Harry? :)

    Like

  139. I would love the audiobook. Laughed out loud when I heard the clip, people around me were wondering what was going on.

    Like

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  140. 142
    Yvonne Davis

    Uk version please! :) Loved it on my Kindle, would love a real book to hold and share!

    Like

  141. I’m in New Zealand so would love the Australian version. Please, pretty please ;-)

    Like

    Sue at Wub Boo Mummy recently posted The toddler cat food diet.

  142. Looking forward to meeting you on the 8th of June! My fiancee and I have been anxiously awaiting your book tour’s swing up this way!

    Like

  143. 145
    Stephanie

    I love the wig. You rock! :)

    Like

  144. I would love a print copy any print copy please :) and as for your tour you are going 1 town over from where i grew up :( I wish with all my heart I could be there. Maybe for leg 4 some where in central or north Florida? Jacksonville, Orlando, Gainesville, St. Augustine? somewhere not 6 hours away.

    Like

  145. 148
    Terri Queen

    Ron Weasley’s wig makes him look a little too much like Carrot Top, I think. A strange mash-up, to be sure.

    oh, and AUDIO

    <3

    Like

  146. Wittiness seems to come and go. Mine is currently out of commission as well, which is what apparently happens when you transcribe and code interviews for research. But if I were to get your audio book, I’d have something funny to listen to that I won’t need to transcribe since I already have the transcript in hardcover. :)

    Like

  147. 151
    Jennifer Vandale

    Aussie please, I love everything that has the tiniest hint of Oz attached to it :)

    Like

  148. So few people have stuffed weasels with nice wigs. And that scarf is just lovely. Exactly what the well-dressed weasels are wearing this season.

    Like

    Teresa Hill recently posted Five Days Grace.

  149. 153
    Angeerah

    I would love an audio version but what would be even better is an audio version with you doing a really bad British accent. Is that possible? Because that would be awesome. But yeah, audio please.

    Like

  150. 154
    Kathleen Smith

    I would love any of those versions!! I am curious to know the difference from the US version. I assume the Australian one is printed upside down.

    Like

  151. Holy shit, leg three, you have three legs? Are you kidding? Are you a child of thalidomide or something? Oh, I kid I kid, I can see you’re having a wonderful time.

    Like

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  152. I would love to hear your inflections to these stories – audio version for sure.

    Like

  153. How is the “historical accuracy” comment not witty? Would love love love the audio version.

    Like

  154. That looks more like Ermione’s wig to me!

    Like

  155. Oh, I would love the audio version, for sure! I have finished you book (fan-freaking-tastic), but I would love to hear it in your own words/voice!

    Like

  156. Audio please! <3 I'm so glad I got to see you in Gaithersburg. You were of course, amazing as always! <3

    Like

    Lesley recently posted Fairy Tales: And Then The Spider Almost KILLED Me. True Story..

  157. I want the U.K. version of your book.

    The print version in the Queen’s English.

    Where Beyonce is named Pip and your Dad only stuffs Royals.

    And I want Ron’s red wig.

    Or a stuffed Royal in the red wig.

    Preferably Charles.

    Like

    hogsatemysister recently posted Awesome Leaves Must Fall.

  158. Since I’m living in the UK: that one, please! Ron’s gone a bit Rebekah Brooks, hasn’t he? (e.g. http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2012/may/15/rebekah-brooks-charged-perverting-course-justice)

    Like

  159. WHOOPEE!!!! You’re coming to MA. You are SO on my calendar, girl! Will you sign my arm? (since your book is on my kindle… ;-) )

    Like

  160. I’d love the audio version. I’m planning on referring to your book when I teach a course on humor writing later this year… I already have the hardcover.

    Like

    Leanne Shirtliffe (Ironic Mom) recently posted A Poem I Wrote When I Was 10.

  161. Audio version, please! And I still think you should come to Nashville!

    Like

    Elaine recently posted Dancing Queen.

  162. Good luck with the 3rd leg of your tour! I’m bummed I didn’t get to go see you when you were out here in LA, but such is life. And by the way, Ron Weasely looks like he’s channeling the awesome redheaded girl from Pixar’s new movie ‘Brave’.

    And ps. a UK edition of your book would be fantastic… just sayin’.

    Like

  163. 167
    Jennifer

    Any version of you is still a great version of you! Buck up buttercup….or some other witty saying that won’t do anything but make you annoyed or think on buttercups and what they are exactly. I mean butter is good. So’s a cup. How do you drink without one? So does that make a buttercup good? Hmm. Anyway, I’d love a UK audio version.

    Like

  164. Audio, please. I heard you speak in Annapolis, but I want the entire experience in your very own voice. (Psst, I’m STILL not really a stalker. I realize my case is getting weaker and weaker on this point).

    Like

    Misty recently posted At Least It’s Not Towels.

  165. Audio please. Love you no matter which self you are today :-)

    Like

  166. I’m not myself either; now that I realize I won’t see you on tour…

    I reckon you’re just going to have to come to visit for the weekend.

    Like

    Amo recently posted Deuce's Mother's Day Gift Guide.

  167. I’m so furiously happy that you are coming to Boston!
    And I would love an audio version, please!

    Like

  168. I’m totally bummed you’re not coming to Denver. It’s a really nice place, and it’s not too far from Boulder, so you’re guaranteed to have people come to see you who are weirder than you could ever imagine.

    I already have your book, so if you pick my name, please give the book to the next homeless person you see. Their signs always say “anything helps,” and a book is smack-dab in the middle of that category.

    Like

    Barbara recently posted If I Wanted America to Fail.

  169. I would love a copy of either Australia or UK. I will do my best to come to Brookline.

    Like

  170. So excited you are coming to Massachusetts. Both my mother and I are huge fans of the blog and book so we will be there!

    Like

  171. I’d love an audio. Pretty please with sugar on top?

    Like

  172. Yay! Brookline! I live right down the street from the Booksmith! Unfortunately I’ll be out of the country when you are there :-( I think the audio book would make up for me not being able to see you live.

    Like

  173. 177
    Pat Higgins

    After looking forward to having you visit my town, Annapols, I ended up missing the chance to come see you. Thanks Mom for making me take you to the ER and spending the night in the hospital…Don’t let that influence your decision though, unless it does, then audio book please :)

    Like

  174. Audio Version please

    Like

    cynicalbuddha recently posted The APO.

  175. Audio! Please please please! Haven’t been able to afford any version yet and an audiobook I could listen to during my delivery job would be AMAZING and make work infinitely more cheerful!

    Like

    Amy recently posted amy_leigh89: @KennethDH or a cutesie noun....

  176. I came to leave a comment about your tour and lookie I get to be in a drawing for AUDIO VERSION please.

    ok now then.. I *knew* you’d so be here for Boston Pride week! You are in Brookline on the 8th, the Boston Pride march is on June 9th. Come. Ride. With. Us!!!

    eastcoastbikerchicks.com :)

    we lead the parade and I’ll be on my Harley!

    comecomecomecomecomecomecome.please? I’m coming to the signing, you can’t miss me. butch. grey hair. non-blending material. and if it’s nice I’ll be on the bike.
    think it over until then. :)

    Like

  177. I’d love the U.K version please. I could hear you using a Texas/English accent as I read it. Sweet!
    I’m proud of your success. Attagirl!

    Like

    David recently posted Thought.

  178. I would love, love, LOVE the audio version since you’re the narrator.

    Like

  179. I would love the UK version. So unhappy I missed you in Houston.

    Like

  180. So excited you are coming somewhere not too far from where Im at in Kenosha. Will you be bringing Hamlet von Schnitzel with? Cant wait to meet you!

    Like

  181. Audio please, and I will take you any way I can get you. Wait, I didn’t mean that…well, I meant that, but not the way it sounded. Okay, maybe the way it sounded but I certainly didn’t mean to say it out loud. Pass the hooch.

    Like

  182. A copy of the audiobook would be delightful. Also, perhaps one day you’ll visit Pittsburgh on a book tour. =) You’ve definitely got some fans in the Steel City!

    Like

    Amy Lynn recently posted 2001: A Space Odyssey.

  183. Audio, Please, Thank You, and BlessYerHeart.

    Like

  184. Audio would be cool! I have your book on hold at the library, but would love to listen to it. Maybe it would teach my 18-month old some choice new words?!
    Also, come to Portland!
    Oregon, that is.
    We love you.

    Like

    Kylie recently posted Into the Mouth of Babes.

  185. 189
    Cassandra

    I’d be grateful for any version you would be willing to send me. It looks like everyone is pretty stoked about the UK & Audio versions, so I’d be more than happy to take an Australian version off your hands!

    Like

  186. 190
    over the hill mom

    So does that mean you put on an accent for the different countries? I am totally confused but would sooo love to win.

    Like

  187. UK! Oddly, your lack of wit still seemed witty. Huh….

    Like

  188. UK Version. The script on the UK front cover is making my font-nerdy heart squee.

    Like

  189. Could I please have the UK version? Haven’t been able to find your book in the U.S. yet.

    Like

  190. OOh! Audio version, please. Much love!

    Like

  191. It’s ok to not be witty sometimes. Can’t let the bar get too high, because then… you can’t reach the whiskey? I don’t know where I was going with that. Anywhoo, I’ve read the book twice now, so I’m gonna ask for the audio because I want to hear it how YOU read it, not the people in my head. THANK YOU for being you, witty or not!

    Like

  192. So jealous.

    I’d love to have a third leg.

    Jumping would be so much easier.

    Like

    moooooog35 recently posted 50 Shades of what?.

  193. 197
    Julianne Terrill

    Rest…rest is the answer to all things

    Like

  194. 198
    Sarah Furlo

    I would love the audio version!

    Like

  195. Audio version all the way! It’s probably the only way I’d manage to get my bestie to “read” your book. She’s anti-words or something. Maybe anti-paper. I can’t be sure.

    Like

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  196. I just finished the book and immediately lent it to my sister, who is already well into it. I would love to actually hear it read via audio-book!

    Like

  197. 201
    Patricia West

    I would LOVE to have an audio version!

    Like

  198. 202
    Elizabeth B

    I would love to have the audiobook please and thanks!

    Like

  199. Audio!! :-)

    Like

  200. audio version please!!!! :)

    Like

    megan recently posted remembering how to ride.

  201. Audio version, definitely! I wish I could’ve attended your Gaithersburg event, but life got in the way :( Good luck with the 3rd leg of your tour!

    Like

    Colleen recently posted Pinnably delicious.

  202. Audio version, please please! Oh the wig!

    Like

  203. So at some point in the tour we need to get thee more south of Annapolis, more north of any part of VA, to be smack dab in DC. AND THEN I’M THERE!

    Also, I want either the audio or physical version. I’m begging and beggars cannot be choosy, as my mother says. Well, she’s actually wrong (as usual); they can be: the homeless woman outside the Metro who declined food when her sign clearly read “Hungry. Will die tonight without some sort of food” said “I don’t eat that shit” when offered a sandwich someone had from home.

    Like

    Arnebya recently posted This Is How I Feel.

  204. I would love either the audio version or Australian. Because they have wombats in Australia and a disturbing lack of waffles.

    Like

  205. 209
    Christine M

    Ron’s wig makes him look like Merida from that new Pixar movie Brave. Just saying.

    And the audio version would be awesome if you pick me :)

    Like

  206. I would love the UK version!

    Like

  207. It’s the Monday blahs. You have photos of taxidermied animals wearing scarves. There is no truly OFF day for you, imo.

    Like

    Karen Sanders recently posted Support, Not In a D-cup Way.

  208. I’d like the audio version since I’ve already purchased the book. Plus I can fall asleep to the sound of your voice… er uhm… insert something less creepy here.

    Like

  209. I wish you were coming all the way up to Milwaukee, I’ll have to try to get my butt to your Chicago stop!
    If I were to win, I’d take the UK version.

    Like

  210. 214
    fussybritches

    Oh yay! You’ll be here for the Printer’s Row Lit Fest! (Wow, I just realized that’s one letter away from a WHOLE different kind of festival…though no less fun, I’m sure.) See you there!

    I’d opt for audio since I’ve already bought two print copies (one for me, one for my mom so she’d give me mine back).

    Like

  211. 215
    Jennifer Fink

    OMG – I would LOVE an audio version! You reading the Series of helpful post it notes for my husband would be priceless!

    Like

  212. UK version please…this way it’s a few degrees closer to Doctor Who too :)

    Like

    Natalie recently posted Rising 3L.

  213. Yay! I love giveaways! I wish you were coming to Seattle though. Or have you? I’m not myself today either.

    At any rate, if I’m lucky enough to win, I’ll take an audio version, please.

    Like

  214. 218
    michelle

    UK please?! You’ve given us enough wit for several more days, I think… enjoy the tour!

    Like

  215. The UK version would be most lovely if you happen to choose me. triple thanks in advance.

    And Ron’s wig looks amazing, that’s how I’d imagine he’d look in the book,you know, if he were in a heavy metal band. Or something.

    Like

    Rebekah Mae recently posted There's a strong chance that I'm moving to New England in the Fall.

  216. Why no Pacific NW leg?!

    Like

  217. 221
    TamaraPaints

    I’d love an audio version!! It was so awesome when you came to Atlanta btw!

    Like

  218. 222
    c8h10n4o2

    Audio! I can’t listen to music when I’m walking the dog because it throws off my stride, and since we kind of live in the ghetto, laughing hysterically for no reason helps keep the muggers from bothering to try and steal my poop bags.

    Like

  219. 223
    Heather Rivet

    Wish your tour was going to bring you to the great white north up here in Canada!! I suppose my hurt could be soothed with a copy of the audio book! :)

    P.S. That’s how I imagine Ron Weasley would look during his 80s hair band phase….

    Like

  220. 224
    Jamie A.

    Audio please. I saw you in Atlanta and you were awesome. I wish I could be as awesome as you.

    Seriously.

    I may have a tiny lesbian crush on you. Maybe.

    Like

  221. I want to hear you, so I prefer audio!
    connie
    Ps, If you aren’t quite you, who else are you?

    Like

  222. Would love a hard copy of the book! Wish you were coming to CT!

    Like

    kt recently posted Job Offer.

  223. I wants a book. Gives me one of those “you have to turn the pages and read it” type books or the “stick it in and push play” kind. I am not picky. = )

    p.s. I have been officially upgraded from homeless to a home on wheels. My dog Rupert and I bought our very first car today. It was so scary and exciting. Yay! us. Maybe next time you go on tour I can drive somewhere and find you and wave from a distance because I will be too nervous to come up and say hi.

    “Don’t Leave” … bestest advice ever!

    Like

  224. I would LOVE a copy of the audiobook. Especially since I will be going to Boston in June and plane travel makes me extremely anxious but it must be done because I am officiating at a wedding and it would be awesome to have you reading to me on the plane.

    I gave my Mom a copy of your book for Mother’s Day. I haven’t really heard from her since then. I don’t know if this means she’s not speaking to me or laughed herself hoarse (or, God Forbid, to death). She told me she expected to get some insight into my psyche from reading the book, since I tell her all the time how well I relate to what you write about.

    Like

    MsDarkstar recently posted Summoned.

  225. 229
    Melzora Towne

    Audio version so I can listen to it in the car and hopefully run into jogger who regrets eating a cookie, then I have an excuse I can blame it on laughing too hard to see the skinny bitch. The cops would understand that… right???

    Like

  226. Seeing you in Charlotte was wonderful last week! Thanks so much for signing my metal chicken! I would LOVE to have the audio version of your book!

    Like

  227. I wish you could come to Klagenfurt, Austria so that I could have you sign my book! You are my favorite woman in the world second only to Condoleeza Rice (I mean c’mon with that bad ass name (I am only judging based on names – to make my favorite woman in the world contest fair)). I am probably going to rig the intercom of my German speaking school and make them all listen to me read it to them, they will be unwilling at first but they would become enamored with you, erecting Jenny Lawson statues, and then attempting to find you. All of Austria would become obsessed with you and nominate you to rule their country in a communistic style.
    It will benefit you greatly.

    Like

    Morgan B. recently posted Death Train.

  228. 232
    Kristi Amick

    Still no Denver?!? *sob* A copy of the audio book might help make up for that oversight. Maybe.

    Like

  229. UK version. Or any of them. Why is the UK cover so much more whimsical and lovely on the cover than the US version? Are Brits more open to whimsy than we are?

    Like

  230. For all y’all who can get to a reading, DO IT. I am still appreciating hearing your material, Jenny, in your own voice a few weeks ago when you were over here in the paradise that is the San Francisco Bay Area. I don’t need an audio book, just wanted to say damn, you’re awesome. XO

    Like

    Ariane recently posted Taking the time it takes.

  231. Take a break. Eat some every flavor beans.

    If I were to win an audio book, I’d be very happy.

    Like

  232. You have three legs?

    Also, I’d like the audiobook please!

    Like

  233. Uk! I have to say, I think Ron Weasley looks a lot more like Hermione now! What with the length and texture!

    Like

  234. I would so so so SO LOVE an audiobook!!
    Again, need something to keep me sane-ish in the lab. Or at least make me giggle until I don’t care. Either will work.

    Like

    Brenna recently posted Where/When the hell am I?.

  235. Audio book! My eight year old son has already picked up the book with the cute mouse on the front and started reading.

    Like

  236. –>Does Ron’s carpet match the drapes? I’m asking for a friend.

    Like

    WebSavvyMom recently posted Wordless Wednesday - Not for the Squeamish.

  237. That wig is awesome! And, if I were to win I would love the audio version!

    Like

    Kristin recently posted Mother's Day.

  238. Would be grateful for an audio copy. My husband and I love your blog! He brought me a double unicorn success club t-shirt for me for mother’s day. You are touching lots of lives, I hope you know.

    Like

  239. I would love an audio copy of your book. I wish me of your dates was in Ontario so I could be close enough to come and see you.

    Like

  240. 244
    J. Martin

    UK edition..plz?

    Like

  241. Audio! And I’m still sad you aren’t coming to Seattle. I don’t even know you and I miss you. Sigh.

    Like

    Adrasteia recently posted How do I hate thee? Let me count the ways..

  242. One. One of your dates.

    Like

  243. 247
    NotNatalie

    Jenny! I’m so disappointed! The day you’ll be in Boston I’ll be in New York visiting my Swiss friend. Any chance you’ll be coming back? Life is so unfair.

    Like

  244. OH MY GOSH! I’m so excited you will be in Brookline!! Can’t wait to see you!

    And please may I have the UK version of your book? That would be jolly badass!

    Accio Jenny!

    Like

    Megan recently posted Roxy’s Grilled Cheese.

  245. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE the book!!!

    Like

    Lori recently posted Mother's Day Weekend.

  246. I would love an audio version! Or UK. Or Aussie. But audio is my first choice.

    Like

    Skerrib recently posted Homebirth-A-Go-Go 2012--Part II....

  247. Any of the above. I haven’t been able to fit one into the budget yet and my “new book” change jar keeps getting raided by my teenagers. The wait is killing me! Well, maybe not killing me but it is definately making me twitch.

    Like

  248. I’m not picky, just pick-me!! :)

    Like

  249. 253
    Jammie C

    Please Please Please come to Washington!! We NEED you here! I will even buy a hardcopy (already got my kindle version) of your book for you to sign!

    Like

  250. I’m thrilled I might get to see you in Montclair AND at the Blog Expo in NYC!

    (Hoping for the audio book.)

    Like

    Cris recently posted In Which I Remember to Think First.

  251. the audio please!!

    Like

  252. I would love any version of your books. :-) I still think you’re absolutely amazing for doing this tour. Way to be a rock star.

    Ron looks like he’s gone all hippie, with a permanent wave. But it all strangely fits in with the dolls in the background.

    Like

    Kelly at Cibatarian recently posted I'm back...sort of...well, getting there.

  253. 257
    Cuntress

    Do you have UK or Australian versions of the audio book? Cause that would be pretty sweet if you read the whole book to us in an accent. If not, I would still like an audio book in your lovely voice. Wish you were coming to Seattle! Next book?

    Like

  254. Audio please please please!!

    Like

  255. Any would be fine with me!

    Like

  256. 260
    Jammie C

    PS I would LOVE the audio version!

    Like

  257. 261
    FieryPinkGirl

    You mustn’t cut his hair! Like Samson, he’ll lose all his power!

    BTW, Audio me!

    Like

  258. 262
    Elizabeth M.

    HOLYSHITHOLYSHITHOLYSHITYOU’RECOMINGTOCHICAGOANDIT’SREAL

    HOLYSHITHOLYSHITHOLYSHIT

    Oh, if I win, audio, but I don’t need to win because I’m already winning because OMG YOU’RE COMING TO CHICAGO AND IT’S REAL OMG.

    Like

  259. 263
    Stephanie

    The Weasely wig is more like “Sideshow Bob”–imagine the Simpsons episode in which he sings the whole score to HMS Pinafore to Bart for the best contextualisation…

    Like

  260. I desperately want the audio book. I’ve heard from all my bloggy friends who have been lucky enough to see you on your book tour that your book is even funnier when you read it. Besides, it will make the lives of truckers more exciting if I listen to your book while driving down the interstate…laughing and crying.

    Like

    Kitten Thunder's Girl recently posted Kitten Cute Fest.

  261. I’d love an audio version! (p.s. was sooooo bummed I didn’t get a chance to come see you last weekend in G’burg!! Darn kids mucked everything up!)

    Like

    Kyra recently posted My heart smiles..

  262. Actually, if we’re talking Ron Weasley circa Goblet of Fire, the wig is accurate… he could’ve given Ariel a run for her money with that hair.

    Like

    Rachel recently posted Obviously it's some kind of conspiracy.

  263. Uk Version for sure! It’s full of whimsy!

    Like

    Michelle recently posted Not Exactly Politically Correct.

  264. I welcome Ron’s copper tresses to the redhead collective.
    Also – were you so inclined an audiobook would be spiffy (as I already own and have read the hardcover).
    I really enjoyed the short audio clip you shared with a few weeks ago.
    Also – still waiting for the Northwest leg of your tour. ;-)

    Like

    John Lewis recently posted My Acting Résumé.

  265. Just ordered your book. So glad it’s available in a Dutch bookstore. Looking forward to reading it. Love your blog.

    Like

  266. I would adore the audio version. Almost as much as I adore you. But since it’s you reading it… Does that mean I’d adore it all the more?

    Like

  267. 271
    hi_desertgirl

    JUNE 8–are you kidding me? The one day I can absolutely NOT be there because of middle school graduation???? Come on! Karma–you ARE a bitch and I HATE you!!!

    Like

  268. OoOoOOOooooh! I’d love to win the audio version. You’re kind of my hero.

    Like

    Teresa recently posted It’s Not all Fun & Dildos….

  269. 273
    Fuchsia Groan

    I, Too have nothing witty to say. I do know that a UK version of your audio book would make driving to my PGCE placement a lot more enjoyable.

    Like

  270. Oh, audio, without question :)
    But, you can add questions if you like :) :)

    Like

  271. Ron Weasely looks like Carrot Top. Hide your steroids.

    Like

  272. 276
    Traci Tolan

    I just may have to come see you in Chicago. I would love the audio tape book.

    Like

  273. Audio would be awesome!

    Like

  274. I would love the audio!

    Like

  275. Audio Book, please! I would love to be able to hear your expressions with all of your stories. You rocked it in Gaithersburg last weekend!!

    Like

  276. I want the Australian version, because my Australian best friend is about to move back to her home country and abandon me – your book might make her absence a little easier to bear.

    btw, congrats on all your success!!!

    Like

  277. You started a sentence with “Leg Three” and couldn’t come up with a joke for that? IT’S A THIRD LEG, JENNY!!

    I’m worried.

    Should we send help?

    Like

  278. I saw “Leg Three” and thought this would be about imaginary friends. *sigh*

    Like

    Morgan Eckstein recently posted My current project list.

  279. Audio please! Hoping to make it to Montclair in a couple of weeks!!!

    Like

  280. 284
    Naomi Harris

    These are the moments when you seem so very real and unapologetically human to me. These are the moments, when your tempo changes for no specific reason, that I see myself in. Where I know that every part of me, the ups, downs, and all arounds, are pretty fabulous too in their own way. No reason or excuse necessary. Thanks for sharing all of you with all of us.

    Like

  281. 285
    Kathleen

    Audio please and thank you!

    Like

  282. So sorry you are not feeling quite yourself today. Feel better soon.. I would love any version of your book, prefer hands on.

    Like

  283. Ooh! Sign me up for the audio book! I hope you find yourself soon – your wit is missed! :)

    Like

  284. Always okay to be just who you are. It helps, though, if who you are is a renowned bestselling author :) I’m happy with anything free you want to throw at me. Though, I guess I would choose the audio because it would probably hurt less when it hit me in the face.

    Like

  285. I would love the Australian or UK version. Thanks for making me laugh!

    Like

  286. 290
    Heather Muns

    I would love the audio version! :) Hope you are feeling back to your normal self soon.

    Like

  287. I heard you/met you in San Angelo, Tx and encourage everyone to make an effort if you are anywhere close. An experience not to be missed. I would love the audio book so I could keep you in my car for when I need a good laugh/pick-me-up!

    Like

  288. I am still hoping for the audio version. My library isn’t carrying the audio and I would LOVE to listen to it.

    Like

  289. I would love, love, LOVE the UK version of the book!!! Please oh please oh please!

    Like

  290. 294
    Courtney Lawrenz

    Audio version please. The author reading her own story is awesome!
    Thanks for being you; you bring smiles to many, many faces.

    Like

  291. 295
    Susan Davis

    Audio, please!

    Like

  292. 296
    Elena Roberts

    Audio please — I want to hear if the reading of it by someone outside my head is as funny as the words I hear in my head!

    Like

  293. 297
    Stephanie Edwards

    The Audio Version! You’re great!

    Like

  294. 298
    Victoria

    That wig is hideously awesome. ;)

    An audio version would be so cool!

    Like

  295. The UK version. It’s got a pretty front-page font :D

    Like

    Alyssa recently posted Hurry Up!.

  296. My first thought when I saw that picture was, “Why is Ron cross-dressing as Hermione?” That wig would be PERFECT for her, if it were a little more brown. :o)

    And if I’m lucky enough to get picked – UK version please! Or the audio. :o)

    Like

  297. M.U.S.T. H.A.V.E. A.U.D.I.O. V.E.R.S.I.O.N. *If you had the audio version of me reading my comment, I would sound like a zombie. It is a gateway to the apocalypse. There honestly is no other way to read it. In fact, you just read it in your own zombie voice and can feel a certain apocalyptic breeze through the crack under the door. I’m sorry.

    Like

  298. Audio version, please, for the hard of seeing.

    Like

  299. 303
    Melissa L.

    I would LOVE an audio book!
    When you coming to Cleveland, OH???? You have no tour dates here and i’m seriously sad!!!

    Like

  300. Ron Weasley’s wig will need the hair straightened as well – or a story about why he suddenly has curls!

    I would love the UK version, I think the more whimsical cover is adorable.

    Like

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  301. AUDIO please! I must hear your voice telling me your stories as I hear your voice in my head as I read anyway! BTW…could you add just ONE more leg to your tour…the Pacific Northwest LOVES you, and if you came to, say, Walla Walla, Washington or La Grande, Oregon, I GUARANTEE at least two people would show up! ;-)

    Like

  302. UK audio please!

    *crosses fingers*

    *and toes*

    Like

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  303. Audio version, but only if read by you.

    Like

  304. Lit fest? In Chicago? OH, the possibilities.

    PS I’d love the audiobook.

    Like

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  305. I’d love to have the UK version, I love the cover for that one.

    Like

  306. And I really need to remember that text emoticons change into images here as my “smile” comes out as a surprised face! :)

    Like

  307. I am coming to Chicago!!!!

    (and I would LOVE to hear the singing on the audio book! please, please!!!)

    Like

  308. I’d adore an audio version!

    Like

  309. Ron’s accessories are fabulous! I’d love a UK copy if you are so inclined. :)

    Like

  310. 314
    Michele E.

    UK version pretty please….

    Like

  311. Aww maybe you’ll come to CT on leg 4?? Wait, does that mean your book tour will take on some sort of animal persona then (4 legs…)?

    I’m going to be taking a 10 hour road trip next month, I’d love the audio version to help pass the time driving!

    Like

  312. Audio if I didn’t miss the boat.

    Like

  313. Good lord, Ron Weasely made me giggle.

    Like

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  314. The wig is awesome. I don’t think it needs a thing done to it.

    Like

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  315. OPLEASEOPLEASEOPLEASE pick me! I need to hear you sing the titles on the audiobook! (but if that’s already gone, I’ll take the whimsicle UK edition!)

    Like

  316. OMG!! There’s a possibility I can come see you at Printer’s Row! Wooeee!!!

    Also, where is the picture of you with 3 legs?

    Like

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  317. Audio version for sure!

    Like

  318. Your book is on my list of many to read and/or listen to! Would love the audio version!

    Like

  319. I wish you were going to be in the Phoenix Area. I would love to pick up you book directly from you! I would like to UK version if i win :)

    Like

  320. 324
    Gia Caldera

    PLEASE, for the love of God and all things holy, please bestow an audiobook to me!! I’m whimsy, I swear I am!! :)

    Like

  321. UK version… audio version… ARGH. @.@

    Sad thing is my parents asked what present I want for my Nameday tomorrow and everything I want would have to be bought online from abroad and they’re just not able to do it ARGH.

    Like

  322. 326
    Meredith R.

    I would love the UK version with the cool cover!

    Like

  323. Love the UK version. Ummm? Please? Pretty Please?

    Like

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  324. 328
    Michelle

    The audio version of your book would officially make me the coolest person I know!

    Like

  325. 329
    Kara Rosales

    Audio, please, please, please!

    Like

  326. I would love to have the audio book. But more importantly, I wish I could get you a “Harry Otter” for your collection. But when I looked up taxidery otters…well the price was a bit steep. But my heart was in the right place!

    Like

  327. Pretty please can I have the audio version. We are driving to NOLA this summer and that would rule. Because I love you!

    Like

  328. Cannot wait until you come to Massachusetts!! I’m halfway through your book, but I fully plan on being finished with it by June 8th. If you’re giving away audio books, I’d love one of those because I won’t lie – I dislike reading, but you’re book is just too freaking awesome to NOT read (hence why I caved and am reading it). See you in 2.5 weeks! I’ll have to start thinking of some strange, yet notable, gift to give you……

    Like

  329. Audio would be lovely then I can make my boyfriend listen to it in the car on long trips (like maybe to Chicago to see you on the last week of your tour!) and we can hear it waaaaaaay too much together!
    We’ll bond, it’ll be wonderful!

    Like

  330. Hi Jenny, I would LOVE a copy of the Australian version!

    Just wanted to say too how great it is to hear updates on the tour and how fabulously well your book is doing!! :)

    Like

  331. I would be up for the Audio version. I’ll still be at your Chicago signing to buy a book and get it autographed!

    Like

  332. Audiobook …for our road trip this summer!

    Like

  333. i would like the UK or Australia version because I spent half my honeymoon reading my kindle version on the toilet bowl

    Like

  334. I would like the audio version of your book please. Or the UK copy of the book, either would be cool. :)

    In case the sob story will help my chances, both my remaining grandparents just died in the past 10 days and I could use a laugh, so the book would really help me not be a miserable git right now.

    Like

  335. That wig is seriously some shawn white sh*t!! UK version please

    Like

  336. 340
    David S. Perry

    I’d love the audio book!
    Always beware the 3rd leg!

    Like

  337. OMG, OMG, OMG, you’re coming to my neighborhood! I’m all a-flutter. I get to meet the funniest person on the Internet in actual person in Montclair, NJ. I’m so excited. You don’t have to give me any kind of free book because I need to buy one at Watchung Booksellers in Montclair. (I think I’ll buy the US version, eh?) I will need you to sign it for me because I totally lack the imagination to come up with something unique for you to sign.

    Like

  338. I don’t care which one I get if I win – just pick me!

    Like

  339. uk version please! that red wig is awesome. ron’s a very lucky weasel!

    Like

  340. 344
    Bianca Hawk

    I’d love the audio version! You’re the best!

    Like

  341. 345
    Lauren G.

    Audio audio! Your voice is so weird!

    Like

  342. UK version PLEASEEEEEEE

    Like

  343. Audio, please. (Love Ron’s new scarf!)

    Like

  344. dudeeeeeeeeeee is it in an aussie accent??? I want that otherwise plain old english :D anyway ron looks like ginny so watch out for hairy otter cause he might have ummmmm ideas :D

    Like

  345. Audio! To make up for the fact that you didn’t come to Seattle so I didn’t get to hear you in person. :)

    Like

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  346. 350
    Stephanie R.

    AUDIO! And I pray you used an accent with it too!!!

    Also, Ron’s wig looks like it belongs to Ms. Grangers, I say dye it! I’ll keep my eyes open for a perfect Ron wig!

    Like

  347. UK version please. Or audio. Whichever.

    Like

  348. 352
    Angela Johnson

    Audio, yo.

    Like

  349. 353
    Kathleen

    I would LOVE an audio version!

    Like

  350. I would love the UK version of the book! I’m nearly fluent in British, you know.

    Like

  351. 355
    Count Megula

    I feel, quite strongly, that you should come to Canada on your tour! Specifically, Vancouver, BC. Please and thank you (see? we are *really* polite). Also, this whole “third leg” of your tour – is that some sort of thinly veiled penis reference? As in, leg one was the right one. Leg two was the left. And now there’s the mysterious third leg… I’m just sayin’ ;)

    ps. Audio book please! I’m not sure if it’s possible, but I think you’re book might be funnier with your vocal intonation. Although, since I’d be listening to it while driving it might not be safe. That’s a chance I’m willing to take though. That’s how brave of a fan I am.

    pps. Penis.

    Like

  352. UK version please! So I guess your trip is called “Tripod” eh?

    Like

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  353. I’m soooooooo sad that you are not coming to Louisiana! :( Of course, I’ll take ANY version.

    Like

  354. 358
    Stephanie R.

    I think you should choose me just for pure idioticy, I’m not ev en sure that’s a word!
    BUT I just realized that I didn’t add Australian to my comment!!!!

    Like

  355. I have the UK book already thanks, I’ve read it cover to cover and loved it. But why did they change the cover? It has the ugliest title in weird lettering.

    Like

  356. Dear madam,

    I would greatly appreciate the whimsy of the UK version of your fantastic book.
    And it deserves high praise because my friends, who dislike reading, are being forced to read your book by yours truly, and they now love it.

    Thank you for your contribution to the I’m-Going-To-Make-Them-Read-Even-If-It’s-The-Last-Thing-I-do Organization.

    Like

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  357. 361
    Murf Mensch

    I want the UK or Aussie Audio book in which you fake their accent as badly as possible.

    Like

  358. audiobook would rock!

    Like

  359. 363
    Deanne Ramirez

    Ooooh, AUDIOBOOK! AUDIOBOOK!

    Like

  360. I’d love to have an audiobook…. I’d like to hear your telling of the story.

    Like

    Jaime recently posted the fate of the world..

  361. Book! Love the real mckoy!

    Like

  362. Audio version please!

    Like

  363. Everybody has off days :) I know I would be a hot mess after being on the road for as long as you have been now. I would love an audio version of your book since I so rarely have time to read with my 3 y/o and 4 y/o around. I would also kill for some of your super awesome animals in costume…but I would settle for a book

    Like

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  364. UK version!

    Like

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  365. So cute! I would love the audio version!

    Like

  366. I would love to have the audiobook, but I’d take any of ’em! I wish I could have come see you in Annapolis, but alas, I have anxiety issues & couldn’t have faced the crowd. : (

    Like

  367. Audio please!

    Like

  368. I’m off today too. It’s been a weird one. Hope we’re both back to our usual selves soon.
    I would very much like the UK version.

    Like

  369. I’d love a copy of the audio book. I’d also love to hear you on Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me. I’d also love a mint chocolate chip ice cream bar.

    Like

  370. I want the one with the funky tree root font!!! Just because I think it’s spoooooooky and cool. (kind of like you)

    Like

  371. I love the red wig and I would love the audiobook.

    Like

  372. I’d love the UK version. Hope you feel better!! And sad you never made it to Portland OR – we need you here. :)

    Like

  373. Audio! Audio! I’d love to hear you say douchecanoe. It’s kinda my dream.

    Like

  374. 378
    TehTimmah

    Ron and ‘Emione need wands. Epic sparkly wands.

    Like

  375. Audio Pah-leaze!!!

    Like

  376. Audio book please! I’m almost through reading the book (It’s amazing!) but I can only imagine how hearing it in your narration would be, laugh out loud funny I’m sure!

    Like

    Maria D. recently posted Keeping It Real.

  377. I would love the audio!! I hope you feel better!

    Like

    Jenn recently posted Dear Grandma,.

  378. I would appreciate any – Australian (I am DownUnder, after all. Just not in Australia, I’m across the Ditch), UK or audio.

    And let’s face it, sometimes trying to be witty sucks. Especially if you’re not in the mood. I’ll take the Bloggess in whichever mood she’s in ;)

    Like

  379. Although I have already bought a copy, I would love to not have to read your book! I’d rather listen!

    Like

  380. Audio would be awesome.
    Thanks for making the rounds on the tour.

    Like

  381. Audio, please, please, pretty please?

    Does it bump up my chances if I promise to make my friend meet me in Chicago for your signing?

    Like

  382. I’m reading your book now, and wanted you to know I’ve almost peed myself several times. Oh, and the book is funny, too!

    I’d love an audio copy, if I win. :)

    Like

  383. 387
    Michelle from Missouri

    I would love the audio version! Thanks!

    Like

  384. I would LOVE an audio book! :) Thanks for inspiring me not to be afraid of my own misfit voice.

    Like

  385. I want that red wig. That is all.

    Like

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  386. Audio please! Well, actually any of them would be fine :)

    Like

  387. That UK cover makes me furiously happy. It’s absolutely the one I’d pick…unless you are planning on doing a British- or Aussie-accented audiobook. That would totally rock too!

    Like

  388. When you have three legs do you buy two sets of the same shoes or opt to give the third leg its own different shoe?

    I’d like to win an audio version.

    Like

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  389. The audio book would be my choice, please! :)

    Like

  390. I would love to listen to the audio book! your readings on your tour have been amazing!

    Like

  391. I would love the audio book! Thanks so much for coming to Maryland and signing my actual book. <3

    Like

  392. 396
    Kara Juhlin

    Oh dear, Ron Weasely looks kinda like carrot top. I love it, though, and the scarf is awesome! I just finished reading my friend’s copy of your book, and I loved it! I would love the audio book, though!

    Like

  393. 397
    Wendy Howard

    Would love a copy of your book for my small community library, here in Kaiwaka, New Zealand! Not fussy on which edition, any would be welcome. The library is run by volunteers, on a very small budget.

    I’ve been a fan of your blog since a friend posted on Facebook about the giant metal chicken, and I pass it on to friends every chance I get. And respect your posts about mental health – they’ve been an eye-opener to me, and they’ve given me new perspective on life, the universe, and everything. Thank you for that!

    Like

  394. I’d love a copy of the audiobook!

    Like

  395. 399
    Liz the Insane

    I have nothing witty to say either (must be something in the air!) so I will just note that the UK version would be whimsilicious!

    Like

  396. 400
    Darlene B

    I desperately need a copy of your audio book. I drove 167 miles to see you in (near) Miami. Very well worth it. I have read your book twice (twice, I say!!) now and absolutely HAVE to hear you read it. Sorry I’m not very witty, I leave that to the experts like you!

    Like

  397. 401
    Sam Marlow

    Trapped by the silver ribbon loved your book and have a few stories to top yours, like when I climbed to the the top of the pyrimid of the sun – and why isn’t human sacifice legal, cause when I’m in a mood I can think of a few people to try it on. Please send me Australian audio versions of the book although I am a Doctor fan.

    Like

  398. 402
    Michelle

    I would love a UK version of your book. I sort of collect them because they seem so much cooler than the US versions. And I read them with a British accent in my head. FYI, Anthony Bourdain sounds really funny with a British accent.

    Like

  399. I want Juanita… Oh did you men a book? I’ll take a hard bound version please….

    Like

  400. 404
    Sam Marlow

    Or the time I played Dracula and pasted out at the sight of blood and made national news wire (AP)

    Like

  401. Is it too late to beg for an Australian copy of the book? The Bloggess the first website that I open at work every morning to get my day off to a good start. If I have the book, I could get everything off to a good start. Pretty please?

    Like

  402. Either of the paper editions would be a joy, seeing as they don’t sell your book at my local bookstore. They must be strictly anti-deer sweater. It’s the only plausible explanation.

    Like

  403. Being Aussie, I’d love the Australian version of your book! I keep forgetting to order it, then my kids do annoying things like eat all the food so I have no money again. One day I will just let them starve and order it. They can survive off laughter for a week :)

    Like

  404. I’ll have you know this is the first time EVER I have commented on someone’s blog. Yes, I like you THAT much. I’d love any type of copy of your book, but more importantly, I want to know WHY you aren’t coming to the most amazing state of Colorado?!? I’d love to meet you and possibly even bring you a taxidermied animal of sorts. Consider making another leg of your journey and include CO–everyone here loves you!

    Like

  405. Laughed so hard I had tears running down my face! Awesome. I’m happy you’ll be coming to Chicago. My sister just got tickets ordered to see you! If you get a chance to come to Peoria, IL, I will be able to come see you. I’m happy she can go and take pics. I’m so jealous:) I hope you are having a good week!

    Like

  406. 410
    Jerri DesJarlais

    uk version…please, please, please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Like

  407. Audio book please!! I’m SO EXCITED you’re coming to Chicago, I’ll see you there!!

    Like

  408. I’d love the Australian one! Given that I live in Australia, and all.

    Like

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  409. 413
    Merete Sorum

    the audio version for for real make this year.

    Like

  410. Audiooooooo! I am dying to hear you read to me!

    Like

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  411. historical accuracy is for suckers. long, flowing red locks are for the ron we all wished he would be in our heart of hearts. seriously he looks just like my scottish lumberjack first boyfriend. once, i braided his hair around straightened clothes-hangers and he looked just like pippi longstocking. it was fabu. ….if that is your definition of fabu: a male pippi. apparently it’s mine.

    audio version, please!

    Like

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  412. Its hard to choose between the Uk version and the audio….How about if I let you pick?
    Thanks!

    Like

  413. Audio version!

    I was reading your book in bed around 1:00am, because that’s what I do. I started laughing so hard at your story of taking too many laxatives and thinking a rapist slipped a note under the bathroom door that I shook the bed with my convulsions, waking up my other half. He mistook my laughter and enjoyment as having some sort of mental break/panic attack (not out of the realm of possibities at 1am) and started consoling me. I couldn’t stop laughing long enough to tell him it was a good thing. Thanks for everything you’ve written – past, present, and future.

    Like

  414. I think Ron looks a bit to much like “carrot top” for his own safety.

    Like

  415. I love the cover on the UK version, but since I already have the US edition, I’d go for the audio book.

    Like

  416. Audio! (Since I already bought two copies of The Book. lol)

    Like

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  417. 421
    Sheridan

    Australian version please!!!
    And of you want to deliver it in person, you can totally stay with us in suburban Melbourne.
    It’s almost exactly like where you live, except for all the nature. And bobcats. I don’t think we have bobcats here. But we do have an assortment of deadly snakes and spiders so it’s still always an adventure!

    Like

  418. 1. Yay for having a third leg! Not many people have one of those.
    2. That wig is epic-ly… epic. I have no words.
    3. I hope you start to feel better. I’ve been more myself this week than I have in the past month and it’s been a breath of fresh air. I hope your break between legs (would that be a crotch?)… Whatever it is… I hope it’s relaxing.
    4. If you need someone to talk to, you can always call me. I’m a great friend. I’ll send you pie.

    Like

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  419. I’d love an audio or UK copy please!

    Like

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  420. Ooh! Ooh! Aussie version please!!

    Like

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  421. Audio!!!!!! Please.

    Like

  422. 426
    Jeanette

    I would love a copy of the audio book!

    Like

  423. Do the UK and Australian versions come with their respective regional accents?! If so, I want the UK version…

    But really, I NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED the audio book!!!!

    Like

  424. I’d love the UK version – I like the title font better. Or…..if you read the audio version yourself, then I guess I’d prefer that. How’s that for indecision?

    Like

  425. No request as we already have the audio book…which is awesome. I am glad that your publisher overlords paid attention to my comment a while back about you coming to Chicago. I assume it was that and not something insubstantial like sales data or purchaser demographics. It’s how most PR decisions are made, by consulting my comments on other people’s blogs.

    Like

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  426. tomorrow is my birthday. i’m not having dinner with you, but my husband, who isn’t as funny or witty as you are.

    I’ll take an audio book, please. I drive from raleigh to philadelphia a few times a year and your audio book will remind me that SOMEONE BRINGS ME JOY AND LAUGHTER.

    Like

  427. I dont like his new wig. he’s trying too hard.

    *audio book please*

    Like

  428. come to Sacramento CA!!!

    Like

  429. 433
    Andrea in Kansas

    Audio! Will you be coming to Kansas?

    Like

  430. Aussie.

    Like

  431. I would love any version in English that I can get. i would especially like the audio version as I listen to them everyday on my bike rides along the beach in Santa Monica, Ca.

    Like

  432. 436
    MIchelle

    If you could use a handholder, or crowd mananger I can yell “back off” with them best of them, fetch you shushies and whatever else you would deem for me to do. I love books but am coming downtown for you to sign mine and would love to hang out!

    Like

  433. And are you ever coming to the beach in Santa Monica, Ca.?

    Like

  434. 438
    Anonymous

    I love Ron weasly and his historically inaccurate wig and I love that you have people that make clothes for your friends!

    Like

  435. …hope you enjoy your 3rd leg! I’d LOVE an audio book… I just got my copy from Amazon–pre ordered but just arrived, I live in the Canadian Arctic so postage takes awhile!
    :) Sarah

    Like

  436. I would love an audio version of your book. It would give me something amazing to listen to while I’m not feeling well enough to sit up :)

    Like

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  437. I would love a UK version, that way I can imagine the Doctor saw it in a book store and sent it to me. :)

    Like

  438. I would LOVE any of the versions of your book, but as I already own the hardcopy – the audio version would be my pick. Hope you get some much needed rest. That tour has to be brutal – fun – but exhausting. We miss you in Texas. Think about coming to College Station? My crazy friends and I would LOVE to hang out with you. We’ll bring the wine.

    Like

  439. 443
    Kimberly

    You rock! I would love an audio copy of your book :)

    Like

  440. That Ron Weaseley wig is making me laugh so freakin hard! He has bigger hair than I did in the 80’s and that is saying A LOT!!!!

    Would love to win an audio version of the book!

    Like

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  441. I’m thinking the Chicago reading is going to be jam-packed, because hello SUNDAY? Not only am I buying fake followers to roadtrip with me and my imaginary friends, but I imagine 2/3 of the midwest will as well.
    So, wait, if that’s all imaginary…will that drink/hair braidy offer apply? I’ll have to get extensions if so.

    Like

  442. 446
    Peachy Girl

    Don’t need the book. I downloaded and read it on my IPhone…just wanted to say that I LOVED IT! I found out too late that you were in Atlanta, otherwise I’d have been there. I might have even had you sign my boob!

    Like

  443. I love Ron Weasel-y’s confidence wig. Could there be a Professor Snake in his future?

    P.S. See you in Boston!

    Like

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  444. 448
    Rhiannon

    Audio!!!!! Please. Thank you.

    Like

  445. 449
    Sweet Caroline

    Even if I don’t win the UK version of your book, I am going to get a copy because the description of the UK cover includes the word “whimsical”. I’m not sure why; I like it anyway. And the cover is way more like what I thought it SHOULD than the American cover. And I’m an American.

    Like

  446. St. Louis is on your way home from Chicago. Could you please pretty please stop here? My friend saw you in Atlanta and I’m so jealous.

    Otherwise I guess I’ll have to settle for the audio version of your book.

    Like

  447. 451
    the diva

    I would love the audio book, so I can be the coolest Mom at school pickup and maybe they will all want to sit in my car while we’re waiting for our kids when they see me laughing hysterically. Or maybe they will stay far, far away because they think I am insane and laughing at the maniacal voices in my head. Whatever. Either way, the audio book would still ROCK!!!

    Like

  448. Welcome back, y’all!

    I would love an audio version, I’ve got to hear the bloopers. Picked up the hard-copy last night, couldn’t put it down and now fear for my sanity.

    Like

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  449. I would LOVE the UK book version. I would be the coolest person I know if I held that in my hands, for even a moment.

    Like

  450. I would love any of them. The audio version might be dangerous while driving my son to daycare but since the school year is almost over and I’ll be out for the summer, I can just listen while I drive around the block a few times for Me Time.

    Like

  451. I’m going to agree with you on the hair.

    Like

    Corey Feldman recently posted General Update on Depression and Egret Series.

  452. Can I have the Canadian version?

    Like

  453. Loving the wig, do they make those in grown up sizes?? So I would like any of the above mentioned copies. I like the UK one a bunch, but I’m not picky!

    Like

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  454. As I have a copy I won’t be greedy and try to get an audio book (wait… is that an oxymoron?) but I wanted to tell you that you are seriously one of the funniest people on the planet and I am a tough audience. I like Ron’s wig. He looks very Rapunzel. You need the entire cast of Harry Potter. You could do one of those stop-action movies with all your creatures.

    Like

  455. I would love an Aussie audio book to go with the hard copy I got that was totally THE BEST Mother’s day IN THE WORLD!!! <3

    Like

  456. Audio please! Your voice is kind of adorable. <3

    Like

  457. I’d love an audiobook.

    Like

  458. 462
    Brandon Michael

    Would love the Audio Version!

    Like

  459. Any chance we’ll see you up in Canada? Vancouver is a lovely city to visit this time of year…. I’ll be getting the audiobook either way, but if you wanted to send it, I wouldn’t object. :)

    Like

    Reanna recently posted Are You a Fucking Doctor?.

  460. If I won a copy of the book, I would just lend it out to all the people I love who need to laugh.

    (and thank you for all the Don’t Move To Texas advice…. cow vagina, scorpions, foxes & snakes…. makes our 10 feet of snow seem so safe)

    Like

  461. As my mother is the head Zookeeper of the Australian exhibit at the Ft. Wayne IN Children’s Zoo(I grew up with Kangaroos in the house). I would be remiss if I didn’t ask for an Aussie version.

    Like

  462. Oooh, in honor of Ron’s lovely new scarf and wig, I’ll take the UK version.

    Like

  463. 467
    Legotech

    I would love a copy of the UK version along with a bit of Ron’s wig to use as a book mark :)

    Like

  464. 468
    miggsy1812

    I would love an audiobook version!

    Like

  465. Audio version! Because every time I listen to it, I will not only hear your book, but I’ll hear Neil’s advice for you: “Pretend you’re good at it.”

    Like

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  466. I really wish that you were coming to the Philadelphia area. My P.O.S. car can’t be trusted to make the trip to the nearest areas you’re going to be.

    I would love the UK version of your book.

    Like

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  467. If you can provide an audio version read by you, then audio.

    If not, UK version of the book would be awesome.

    Like

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  468. Audio……. I’d love to hear the entire memoir in YOUR voice!!! So sad I can’t make it to Brookline- but I have to bring my kids to Warwick RI to celebrate the colonists burning a British ship that got stuck in the harbor at low tide…… one of the acts that led to the revolution…..AND they go in full 1770-something garb!!! Woohoo! (maybe I will not get stuck in the middle of a 5k that no one warned me about this time!)

    Like

  469. I live in NH, and I see that you will be in Brookline MA for your tour. Will you be doing a book signing? Because I have your book as an ebook :(

    Like

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  470. 474
    Michelle May

    Ron Weasely’s wig looks a little “Carrot Top-y” to me.

    Like

  471. UK version, pretty pretty please! And then I can have you sign it – when you come to Massachusetts!!!!!!! So excited :)

    Like

    Katy recently posted Cock-a-doodle-doo!.

  472. I live in NH, and I see that you will be in Brookline Ma, on June 8th. Which is the closest tour to me. Will there be a book signing? I have your book as an eBook right now :(

    Like

    Amy recently posted Leg Three!.

  473. Ron Weasely = Carrot Top!

    Like

  474. 478
    Jennifer

    Audio, please. Thank you.

    Like

  475. Audio would be awesome! Hearing motherfucker with a Texas twang makes it seem more authentic somehow.

    Like

  476. Definitely audiobook. It would make my early morning drive to work much more fun.

    Like

  477. I would love the audio copy of the book! It would be great to hear you tell the stories. Although, I’d treasure any of them!

    So sad, I can’t get to any locations of your book signings. I’m so glad to see that you are thriving with the tour though. The love and support of your fans is truly inspirational. You really are an awesome person.

    Like

  478. 482
    Angelina

    Audio version for me, please! I have your book but would love to hear your little kid voice :)

    Like

  479. I would love the UK version. I absolutely LOVED your book!

    Like

  480. BTW, I would love to see Juanita in the Ron Weasely wig, with the caption, “That’s not the color I wanted!” : )

    Like

  481. I would love the audio version. I have already read the uk version cover to cover and loved it! I’ve now passed it on to a friend who couldn’t afford their own copy and think it would be even better ( if its possible) to hear it in your voice instead of the little voice in my head, plus it would totally annoy my partner!

    Like

  482. I’d love to hear the audio book!

    Like

  483. I already have the audio version and a hard copy :). So I think the Australian version would be fun! You rock!!! Wish you would come to Phoenix!

    Like

  484. Audio. I heard a sample of it on some website and it sounds so awesome…

    Like

  485. Ron is totally wearing his confidence wig in that picture! Ermionie must be trying to get him to cast spells again!

    Like

  486. You know I want them both. Just flip me a coin. Thanks.

    Like

    tokenblogger recently posted The Darling Husband….

  487. OMG Jenny – that link to your Chicago event is tretcherous! I almost died trying to find out where to come see you on the dasterdly intranets. Like it’s a secret and you really don’t want us to come stalk, I mean meet you? Hmmmm. Well I figured it out anyway, muh-ha-ha ( my evil laugh) but others might give up because it really was a needle in a haystach search. Can’t wait to laugh my ass off with you in person!

    Like

  488. I would like an audio book please. Sorry you’re not yourself today. :-(

    The red wig rocks though.

    Like

    Maggi recently posted Waiting....

  489. 493
    Rebecca R.

    I think Ron Weasely’s wig would work in an alternate-reality version of Hairy Potter (my name for the all-taxidermy version of Harry Potter).

    Were I so lucky as to win, an audiobook would be preferred.

    Like

  490. Oh! Oh! I want to hear you read the book. I tried to read some out loud for a friend, but I was laughing too hard to finish. Audiobook? Problem solved.

    Like

    unmitigated me recently posted Reality.

  491. Audio book please! After hearing just your snippet you posted of your audio book I’ve been dying to get it! Of course I was very very drunk when I heard said snippet post wine tasting festival.

    Like

    Stephanie H recently posted The Sickly Herbivore.

  492. Can you come to Minneapolis?

    And audio would be amazing!

    Like

  493. Audio please! I would also blame Ron Weasely’s wig for any problems you may have this week – it’s frightening!

    Like

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  494. I’m probably confused as to whether you mean an audio book read in an Australian accent, or a book given to an Australian. So since I’m from Australia (G’day mate, chuck a shrimp on the barbie cobber! and all that) I would LOVE a book!!! Not sure I could listen to one read in an Aussie accent though, we tend to cringe when we hear ourselves talk!

    Like

  495. 499
    Stephanie B

    I can haz Audio? I am so in love with your book and I hate so much that I wasn’t able to see you in Charlotte. My aunt who introduced me to you wasn’t able to go, due to lack of a sitter, and I couldn’t go without her. I did however listen to you on Bob & Sheri that morning. You sound like a wonderful woman and hopefully when you write the next book I can fangirl at your feet.
    Also, your Zombie theories are totally legit.

    Like

  496. I would totally dig the audiobook, and can I just say how bummed I am to not catch you when you are in Beantown?? and you’re event is on my Anniversary to boot!!

    Like

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  497. Being an Australian, I’d love a copy of the Astralian version of your book :-)

    Like

  498. Aussie Aussie Aussie, oi oi oi!

    Like

  499. Audio would be awesome! Also, I’m sure you are hearing this kind of thing non-stop, but I was so sad not to see Seattle on that list. I mean, yes, it rains here non-stop. I get it. But it was still sad :-(

    (I still have high hopes for Book II’s tour.)

    Like

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  500. I think Ron’s wig is spot on. It’s for Ron- the later years when Ron goes through a mid-life crisis and is trying to be hip and cool but Hermione won’t let him buy that new Nimbus 6,000 he wants so he grows his hair out and gets an earring.

    Also, if you’re giving out books, I’d LOVE the audio version. I was, after all, the last person standing in line for your Atlanta book signing.

    Like

  501. Aussie version mate, ta.

    x

    Like

  502. 506
    Brenda Jane Fierce

    Ear Candy Audio!! >.<

    Like

  503. I’d love to get my hands on either hardcopy version!

    Like

  504. I’d love an Australian copy of the book – does that mean that you’ve changed all the slang in the book? Are their references to Cossies?

    Like

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  505. I would like the audio book please.

    Like

  506. 510
    Lacey B.

    Totally the audio version. And I highly recommend you make a british and australian version of the audio, complete with fake accents.

    Like

  507. 511
    veggiekitty

    any version would be awesome, really!

    Like

  508. I would LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the audio version! Nothing would be better to hear your story in your voice!

    Like

  509. 513
    Genevieve

    I love his scarf and the ridiculous wig. My friend just posted a picture from a book signing she went to and I’m so green with envy it’s not even funny.

    I would love the UK version!

    Like

  510. I’m sorry that you were in San Francisco when I was not there. I want an audio version like nothing else. Does the reader have a british accent?

    Like

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  511. Australian copy of the book please! I’m curious as to what makes it Australian, though…does it come with added flies?

    Like

  512. I hope you come back to Texas!

    Like

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  513. Australian, please. You’re my hero!!!!

    Like

  514. AUDIO. still need to bloggess-ize my hubby. also, i was thinking of sending on my hard copy to someone who cant afford their own and they can do the same. kinda like the red dress but with your book. when someone is done they can write a little note in the pages and pass it on. then after maybe 10 or so it can come back to me. not sure how that would work, cause i totally want it back after those who want to read it have. off to ponder this one.

    Heather

    Like

  515. I’d love the UK version. I’m looking to pimp you out to some people for Christmas, especially the ones who work HR and have been privy to penile pictures. I think it will help them to work through the trauma.

    Like

  516. Well the audio version would make my trek up to Mi from NC fun…I’m gonna have to say on of the books..the font on the UK version is kick ass…but who am I kidding, I would be happy with any of them.

    Like

  517. UK please. I think the scroll-y letters are beautiful. And, you’re hilarious. So you, in a pretty book… what more could I ask for?

    Like

  518. Come to SoCal. Would love to see you.

    Like

  519. Audio pretty please! I love your book :-)

    Also, I too know the pain of herniating a disc on your neck by brushing your hair, washing your face, brushing your teeth, sneezing, and just standing there.

    Like

  520. Audio for me please! I would love to hear your hilarity. Thanks!

    Like

  521. Dear Bloggess,
    I thought I was the only one! I too had pet duck(s). Though you only had one, I had 2. Their names were Cocoa and Krispy. I don’t remember them, but I blame that on classic Freudian repression. I was informed a few years ago upon stumbling upon a photo (I am now 34) that we had ducks, and “you loved them” and then “Grandma ate them.”
    PS: I want an audio copy of your book, it seems only right since reading it makes me laugh out loud and an audio version would be more enjoyable to all the people around me who think that I’m insane. Technically, their right, but they dont need to know that.

    Like

  522. Ooooh, Australian version puhlease!!
    You should also come down here and personally deliver it…I’ll try and find you a stuffed possum or something…

    Like

  523. Oh. That is a *lovely* shade of red!

    I would love any version of your book…… How about the audio? Does it come in 8-track?

    xo

    Like

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  524. Audio, please!

    Like

  525. Would LOVE an audiobook…but if I don’t win one I will most likely buy one. Hearing you read aloud in Annapolis made the book even funnier than when I read it.

    Like

  526. UK version would be great…wouldn’t even seem foreign here in Canada. :)

    Like

  527. Audio! Hope to see you in jersey!

    Like

  528. I’d love the Aussie version!
    If only your tour were coming here! I can think of a bunch of cane toad paraphernalia you could add to your taxidermy collection!
    Stuffed toads holding bottle of liquor anyone? http://www.flickr.com/photos/87791108@N00/2170444145/
    They’re classy toads though, see their little canes?
    There’s always kangaroo scrotum coin pouches too…

    Like

  529. I really want the UK version (my Dad’s a Liverpudlian) -since I bought not 1 but 2 books on Amazon -before it was even on sale, y’all!!!! But I’d take the Aussie too (my Dad’s uncle immigrated there about a century ago). And to hear your voice in my delicate ears would totally f@cking rock too, so Audio would be awesome too. whatever you want to send. or deliver, when you add Savannah, GA “the Hostess City of the South” to your book tour. We really do read here! And I’ll take you out to lunch at what we affectionately call “Taxidermy Barbeque” because in the rural county directly west of Savannah, where we used to live, there really, honest to f@cking God and St. Agatha too, is a barbeque restaurant that’s decorated in taxidermy. So you feel closer to your food, kind of like a farmer’s market, only with road kill hanging on the wall above your booth. Seriously, my treat if you come to town. Love the book, made me feel sane for the first time every in my life!

    Like

  530. I have my tickets for the Chicago appearance, and listed “Unicorn Success Club” as my Organization

    Like

  531. Surprise me. And I still can’t believe you aren’t coming to Salt Lake City….surely there is an underground market here for “alternative” bloggers (that’s what we call folks with potty mouths…or those who live in Texas).

    Like

    Lala recently posted The Candy Man.

  532. I always love it when people say they aren’t themselves. I always wonder what it would be like to not be myself and that would be cool in a way but kind of scary. Hope you are back to yourself soon! Or if not maybe you can be someone really cool like Hermione! I’d love to be her just once. She is bad ass. :)

    I’d love to have your audio book. I want to hear you tell your story. I am in love with your book and was in the airport the other day reading it. The lady next to me needed to know why I was having seizures while reading this book. I showed her the cover and she knew of this book! I was shocked because she was about 70 years old. I had no idea you had the following of the older generations too! I’m impressed and a little sad to think that maybe I’m not as hip as I thought I was. :) Or maybe this little older lady was just too hip for her generation. :) Anyways. I was reading about you being attacked by a bear and I couldn’t help but laugh uncontrollably while reading. And then it just kept going and I couldn’t stop. Good thing my plane was delayed for an hour so I could get some more reading in!

    Like

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  533. I suspect that wig perfectly represents what the hair of Ron and Hermione’s children would look like.

    Like

  534. I definitely want to get the audio version. And I’ve put the Brookline date on my OFFICIAL WORK CALENDAR.

    Like

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  535. 539
    Christa Irell

    Jenny- you need to come to DENVER!!!!!! I would love to win ANY of the copies you are giving away- you are so generous! As well as wonderfully witty and awesome- I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your book, even though it made my hubby slightly crazy with me as I snorted, guffawed, giggled, and downright laughed till I cried while reading it! XO

    Like

  536. I’d love a copy of the audio book. I wanted to buy it from Audible, but they said I couldn’t, because I’m in Australia, which makes absolutly no sense to me. They even contacted your publishers, who replied something like “We don’t care about people in Australia, they are not worthy”. (I paraphrased that) You don’t have to give me a copy of the audio book – but pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese make it legal for me to buy it here.

    Like

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  537. 541
    Heather M

    oi, guv’nah, the UK version would be crackin’!

    Like

  538. Wow! I was bummed I didn’t get to make to into NY to see you, and now you’re coming to my local bookstore, a 3 minute walk from home. Life is good.
    Quick primer for your visit- Montclair is in no way related to the Jersey Shore. Do not expect fist pumping or orange people. Montclair is very liberal, very diverse, often very quirky. Along those lines, it is home to Yogi Berra, Stephen Colbert, and the Russian spies who were arrested last year. Also, Dr. Leo Sternbach, who invented the precursor for valium, was born here. Whoo.

    Like

  539. Aw, skip Chicago and come to St. Louis!

    (Also, I’d take anything you were willing to give!)

    Like

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  540. 544
    Nadine Mathews

    I just (Saturday) had my second baby and no longer have time for an actual physical book., so I would love an audio copy that I could listen to on the run! I am sooo excited that you scheduled a stop in MA!!

    Like

  541. 545
    CassidyAthena

    I can’t believe you will be at the town next door, Montclair, and I won’t be able to attend because I already own the book (I preordered, and can’t really afford to get a second one right now, been unemployed for 3 years)! And they called you “Miss” Lawson — it’s like they don’t even know you!

    Like

  542. 546
    Lisa-Marie

    I am so in love.. thanks for the smile, I needed one so bad after the worst day ever.. I just want to go throw up and then hide…. and maybe repeat..

    Audio pretty pretty please…

    Like

  543. ZOMG CHICAGO CHICAGO!!

    Hot damn that is the day after my husband graduates grad school and thank GOD because I’d hate to be all “I’m busy that day, honey, sorry”.

    I will seeeeeeeee you! With eyeballs!!

    Very excited! Would love a book but will be happy just to hug you with my eyes.

    K

    Like

  544. 548
    Minnesota Red

    Wow, Ron’s wig is my very own hair color. Lucky weasel!
    UK paperback please!

    Like

  545. I’m in Australia, I love your blog and the first chicken I ever owned was called Beyonce. No joke. And that was well before your Beyonce came along.

    I had two chooks called Beyonce and Bjork, I got them as tiny chicks. Beyonce had bootie, thus the name. They were incredibly affectionate but sadly after a week in Bali I came home to find they had started crowing. I was devastated. They also started to get very possessive, to the point where Beyonce attacked my Ugg Boot as she was clearly jealous of the affection and warmth it gave my toes.

    After a labourious search, and several complaints from my neighbours, I found the two pop stars a new home at a free range farm where they could find groupies and live happily ever after.

    Of course, because you then named a chicken Beyonce, it’s like we’re sisters. So I would like the book please ;-)

    Like

  546. I would love an audio book!

    Like

  547. Audio, please!

    Like

  548. audio please! :)

    Like

  549. I would love a copy of the UK version of ‘Let’s Pretend This Never Happened’, please! In theory, there is a copyright library (to which I have access!) in my town, but, like many theories, this one is but a lie (though I do indeed have access to the library that is theoretically a copyright library. Sadly this does not make the absence of a copy of ‘Let’s Pretend This Never Happened’ in my town any easier to handle).

    Like

  550. AUDIO! Because I have your book and read it and laughed so hard my husband was afraid I’d ruptured something and I would love to hear your voice and emphases…emphasises…whatever as you read your hilarious wonderful book!

    Like

  551. I have the nook version – would love the audio book!

    Like

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  552. haha I love it!!!

    Like

    Jes recently posted Kids Say....

  553. Ooh ooh ooh love audio books (and Ron’s scarf) I listen while I melt glass with a torch (and try not to burn myself when laughing!)

    Like

  554. i would be thrilled with anything you sent my way. but most especially the aussie version.

    Like

  555. I would love the audio version….another too hip for her generation older lady!

    Like

  556. Darn!! I’m going to Chicago on the 15th!!!!! I’m going to miss you by 5 days!!!

    Like

  557. I’d love an audiobook!!
    I have the hardcopy, and just about died laughing, but I have a feeling it’ll be even better to hear the crazy stories in your voice!

    Like

  558. 562
    Rachel H

    I would KILL for an Aussie version. Well, not you. I wouldn’t kill you. This seems like a poor choice of words. Let’s start over. Ahem….

    I would LOVE an Aussie version! Being on the very farthest side of the world makes me miss America sometimes. Thank goodness for the interwebs.

    Like

  559. CHICAGO! Oh I’m so glad you’re coming here! I’ve already got a copy of the book, and I’ve already laughed myself into an asthma fit and nearly peed myself, but an audio would be pretty awesome.
    About the wig though- leave it alone and just say it’s in homage to the fluffy hair in the fourth movie when all the kids looked like the Beatles.

    Like

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  560. Heard you speak in Gaithersburg, MD. Would love to hear you again and again on audio. Though it is easy to read in your voice now that I have had the opportunity to hear you at length, besides odd bits on youtube! It was a treat to have you in our neck of the woods!

    Like

  561. 565
    Kristin D

    Jenny, You are my savior! I read your blog relentlessly, and whilst reading I always vow to create my own blog in hopes of slightly resembling your amazingness. But then, I realize I can never compare because you are so freaking hilarious! I would absolutely love a copy of your audiobook so I can listen to your hilariousness while driving to work! Also, can you please come to Pennsylvania on another leg of your tour?!

    I love that you are so open about your struggles with depression, and reading your posts helps me cope with my daily struggles with depression and anxiety.

    Like

  562. I would really, really love an audio book! I am a teacher and I drive an hour each way to and from the school, and I am poor as sin, so it would be phenomenal! I would even mail it to someone else when I am done with it!

    Like

  563. Audio!

    Ginger wigs are awesome.

    Like

  564. 568
    Denise Rivers

    I would love the UK version! I am the friend Katie Granju got your autograph for!!! My friend Philip plotzed.

    Like

  565. Audiobook! for my long long commutess….

    Like

  566. the uk version please – that font is crazy! :)

    Like

  567. I’d gladly take the Australian or the UK version! I really wish your tour would bring you to San Diego.

    Like

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  568. I’d like an audio version of you reading with an Australian accent, or British, I’m not picky. Please tell me this is a four legged tour that includes Minneapolis?!?

    Like

  569. It’s Rasta Ron Weasely, mon!

    Like

  570. Yikes!…yikes yikes! Ron Weasely is looking like the illegitimate wizard rodent offspring of carrot top :-o A hair cut is definitely in order there!

    PS I’m still waiting for Seattle!

    Like

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  571. I would love the audio version :) Thanks!

    Like

  572. Oh and I’d love the audio version of your book!!

    Like

    Canoncowgirl recently posted Turtle Burgers = Night Terrors.

  573. Just got my Chicago tickets!! Can’t wait. UK book!!

    Like

  574. Audio! I have read the book twice already but after your reading in Atlanta (hilarious!) I would love to have you read me the whole book. :-)

    Like

  575. The audio book! I would love to have seen you when you were out in Cali but I was out of town. :( Maybe for your next book!

    Like

  576. I’m so glad you are coming to Chicago! Lit Fest is fantastic anf you will make it the best!

    Like

  577. 581
    purplepenguin

    Oh no!!!!! You are coming close in NJ, but I will be away!!!!! How about coming to PA? There are lots of people who love you here. You could do Pittsburgh, lots of college students there. How about a smaller space, like the Lehigh Valley? There’s the new Arts Quest Space in Bethlehem, you would love it. An we have Peeps! Please????????????????

    Like

  578. UK. Please, please, please, please, please, pleaeaaaasssseeeeeee!

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!

    Pick me?

    Like

  579. will you come to portland?? the one in oregon, that is.

    Like

  580. I just finished reading your book, and I would love the audio version.

    Like

  581. Id love a copy of the audiobook!

    Like

  582. you’re coming to brookline! so happy :-)

    Like

  583. Wow, Ron’s hair is… impressive. Epic even.

    I’ll take your audio book if you have an extra handy, if not I’ll just fangirl you when I see you in Brookline. I’ve already figured out what I want you to sign. I’m very excited.

    Like

    Kelly and Geoff recently posted I guess we’re continuing with the theme.

  584. 588
    Barbara Snow

    Minneapolis is only one stop over from Chicago. C’mon up north, girl – we’ll show up in droves.
    Fondly,
    Barb in Minnesota

    Like

  585. 589
    Caitlyn D

    Audio pleeeeease!!!! :D

    Like

  586. I want a UK audiobook because I loved the book and soooo want to hear it read by you… and because I’m going to be visiting Texas next year and want to ask if you’d sign it. :)

    Like

  587. UK please!

    Like

  588. Audio! Especially since I can’t go to anything on your tour (I live in Ohio. You don’t want to come here. Really. I won’t even beg you. That wouldn’t be nice).

    Like

  589. AUDIOBOOK! My mother and I are about to take a roadtrip for her sister’s funeral and it’s the only way I can imagine getting through it.

    Like

    Midianite Manna recently posted I did it, you stupid m----r f-----r!.

  590. 594
    Tracy B.

    Audio book please!! Also, if you haven’t seen the awesomeness of the taxidermy stuff on this blog I have a feeling you might love some of the stuff!! http://www.reidpeppard.blogspot.com/

    Like

  591. Oh, Jenny, you almost always make me laugh. Unless you’re trying to be serious, then you don’t. But you’re awesome either way. The wig and scarf look great. And I’m so happy you have a third leg. When are you coming to Cincinnati?!?

    Like

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  592. All I can say is WOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO Montclair!!! I’m going to appropriately try like crazy to be there!!!!!!

    Like

  593. I love Ron Weasely’s wig, however I feel I should point out that it kind of looks exactly like Ermione Grangers hair too (except ginger). What that means is that at present they could share the wig depending on who felt most follicularly challenged on a given day, if Ermione could tolerate being a red head and Ron could tolerate such a lustrous wealth. But for authenticity, and to stop Ermione from being jealous, it might need a trim!
    If you aren’t yourself, who are you? PLEASE say Professor McGonagall!!! :D

    UK version if its me.

    Like

  594. 598
    Anonymous

    I’d love to hear you read your work! I’m planning my first day of vacation around reading my copy.

    Like

  595. LOL That wig. I want the UK Version please!!! It’s so fancy.

    Like

  596. 600
    Miss Kitti

    Feel like you soon. And good luck w the last leg. Audiobook please.

    Like

  597. Wow! i would LOVE the Australian audio book! i only recently discovered your blog and its freakin hilarious, i cant wait to hear/read the book! I’d have to listen to it at home though; lately ive been reading your blog while on the bus, and people keep shooting me odd looks when i randomly start laughing at pictures of taxidermied animals…

    Like

  598. Though I’m not technically in Australia, I’d love the Aussie version even though I’m a die-hard New Zealander.
    We tend to get forgotten about, being such a small country. We get missed off maps, hardly ever get our own versions of things and 99% of the planet either doesn’t know our country exists or things we are Australia’s other island… so, so, so, so wrong!
    It’s no wonder I shout and cheer out loud every time we are finally mentioned in passing in a movie, tv programme or book produced outside our country.

    Like

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  599. 603
    Mary Ellen

    Audio, please. You do know that you could be that sexy librarian in that eye glass commercial, right?

    Like

  600. I’m an Aussie but would love the UK version.

    Oh watch out we’ve got a badass over here.

    Congrats again on all your hard earned success.

    Like

    beccaann recently posted Movie Inspired Outfit – 500 Days of Summer.

  601. Tour in Portland. I will buy you a maple bacon donut. You can’t resist that.

    Like

  602. Audio! I am super bummed that I won’t be able to make it to the Brookline, MA reading. I have plans with a long-lost friend that evening. :(

    Like

  603. You really need to bring the book tour to Tucson, AZ. I know it’s hot here, but you can totally use my pool. Also, I make a mean wine slushy…and I hardly ever clean deer in the house anymore, honest.

    Like

  604. I would love any of them! You are AMAZING!

    Like

  605. 609
    Karen Song

    I just need you to know how much I love reading your blog. I am living in Thailand and had my books taken from me in China due to crazy fees for the luggage that I wasn’t willing to pay. I would LOVE an audio book from you, as you rock! Either version would be fine.

    Like

  606. You’re coming to chicago??! YayYAYyay!! I’m totally putting on my hawt bra then! (For the giveaway, I’m totally gunning for the UK printing, for extra fanciness. Honestly, though, I just really wanted to voice my enthusiasm over you making it to Illinois)

    Oh heck yes, peoples- this party is ON!m

    Like

  607. Booksmith in Brookline! Yes!!! I’ll be there!!!!!

    Like

  608. Australian! or Audio! Please! Thankyou!!!

    Like

  609. Is the audio the UK or Australian Audio, and if so do you use an accent? B/c the only thing that would make your book better is possibly a british accent. or cake.

    Like

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  610. 614
    Betty Boop

    I still want you to come to Minnesota and to give me an audio copy!!! It will be even better hearing the book in your voice.

    Like

  611. I would absolutely love an audio version! I just put an rss reader on new phone and have loved catching up with you. For old time’s sake I looked up the original Beyonce chicken story, and laughed until I cried. And my husband thought I was nutso. I had a rough day. And Beyonce made it better. Oh, and what are the chances you’ll be on Ohio?

    Like

  612. I’d love a copy of the Australian version, as my taxidermied lookouts have not yet reported it’s arrival into my local bookstore.

    Like

  613. I’d LOVE to get the audio version. And I love Ron Weasely’s new accessories!

    Like

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  614. Would love an Audio version to go with the written one I have…

    Like

  615. You will be in Jersey soon… Preparations must be made!!

    ALERT THE CARNIES AND START THE BONFIRES! SHIT’S ABOUT TO GET REAL!!

    Hugs!

    Valerie

    Like

    Valerie recently posted Harry Potter Land is my Jerusalem.

  616. Audiobookplease! Dying to hear the extras- I hear they are. Hilarious!

    Like

  617. AUDIO, please!

    And Ron Weasley’s flowing ginger locks are super sexy… and a little ridiculous.

    Like

    JRose recently posted New News is Good News.

  618. I don’t want anything from you, my life is already plenty weird enough. I just want to know if your book tour is coming back through the south anytime ever? I only recently found your blog, and I AM IN LOVE. In a non-creepy way, of course. Yeah, definately non-creepy.

    Like

  619. 623
    Gretchen

    Audio, read in an Australian accent with British thrown in at random, unexpected moments…

    Like

  620. UK version. Love that accent. Plus they have Guy Fawkes day and you never know when you might need an emergency Guy Fawkes present.

    Like

    Eileen recently posted Random Research Monday.

  621. I’d like the audio version, please. And I expect to win one of them because I’m pretty awesome and deserve it. And I’d love to sit at the neighborhood pool listening to your book on speaker so I can get strange looks from my neighbors. It’d be worth it! Pick me, pick me :)

    Like

  622. Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oi Oi Oi!

    Like

    Sheri Bomb recently posted A Stitch In Time: Retro Repro!.

  623. Audio, and you are hilarious even on your off days!

    Like

  624. 628
    K Robertson

    Would LOVE an audio or a UK version – I am not picky, although the UK version would go well with my UK versions of Harry Potter, no? I missed you in Atlanta, coaching got in the way (I coach swimming), but have wanted your book for ages. Please??

    Like

  625. Ron’s too sexy for his red wig….
    Audio, please

    Like

  626. Audio audio audio oh please please let me have the audio! I’ll trade a wonderful passive aggressive story for it! The laugh so hard you pee you pants kind of story….at least that is what my friend said but then again she’s had four munchkins and things aren’t quite in place the way they were….but please choose me!

    Like

  627. Audio sweetie! Love to hear you read your own words!!

    Like

  628. Ron’s too sexy for his red wig…

    Audio, please !

    Like

  629. 633
    Joanne C

    I wish we could see you in Seattle!

    I’d love the audio version, please. :)

    Like

  630. I would SO love an audio copy of your book (already bought the e-book.) Unfortunately, I spend a large amount of time commuting in the car (and for some reason, people frown at you from their vehicles if they see you balancing an iPad on your steering wheel and trying to read whilst hurtling down the highway) so an audiobook would help me enjoy my Bloggess fix safely. (As long as I don’t double over, attempting to laugh up a kidney.)

    You didn’t happen to read the audiobook in a British accent, did you? Because that could be even funnier. AND more awesome.

    Like

  631. I would love the UK version.
    You should come to Seattle. They’d love you here!

    Like

  632. I’d love the UK version!

    Like

  633. 637
    ReneeReader

    Audiobook, pretty please.
    You were fab at the Gaithersburg book festival near DC. The merriment at your pavilion could be heard several tents away! Well done with the crowds.

    Like

  634. 638
    Christie

    i’m sorry you’re out of sorts today.
    really, really.

    i would love the uk version, or an audio version of you reading your awesomesauce book in a fake english accent.

    Like

  635. Ron’s wig looks like it belongs on Ermine. A trim is definitely in order.

    Audio book!

    Like

  636. 640
    Mark Fryerparts

    Audio version for me… although truthfully, I would not be picky. Mostly, I just want to hear you describe the pictures in the book (since y’know, they can’t be seen in the audio version). Because I never would’ve believe dthe Jams-wearing raccoon without proof.

    Like

  637. Our library system has multiple copies of your book available! Not so many that people won’t need to actually buy a copy, though, but I thought it was exciting that you’ll be in the library. When I look at the catalog listing, there is a link to Goodreads.com, and apparently over 900 people have rated your book and give it an average of 4.5 out of 5 stars. That’s awesome. Congrats on a job well done.

    Like

  638. I’m the 597th comment – like what chance do I have of winning the UK version? Like slim, right? But it’s worth a try. It’s that or win the lottery to get to the States and hear you on tour.

    Like

    scriptorsenex recently posted Meandering around on a Wednesday.

  639. 643
    g33kling

    Anything read by you would be awesome.

    Like

  640. 644
    Cheryll Fochtmann

    Please oh please oh please talented one…I would love to have an audio copy of your book. I have a wonderful hardback copy but dream, yes dream of having you read it to me.

    Like

  641. Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oy Oy Oy!
    :D

    Like

    Brigón recently posted Hello world!.

  642. 646
    reba lynn

    I still can’t get on board with the whole dead animal thing. UK Coming to Cleveland, OH?

    Like

  643. 647
    Natalie K.

    Audio! Spending too much time in the car.

    Like

  644. UK! I’m digging Ron’s hair…definitely how I pictured it.

    Like

  645. Yes, I wish you would come to Seattle also! :) I’d take the Australian version. So, it will be read in an Australian accent, right?

    Like

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  646. Doh! “Sold Out” for Chicago. I’m driving 1200 miles just to see you. (Okay, I lied, I’m visiting my aged parents but I’d stop by to say hi.) Anyway, are you going to do any signing, book signing that is and not American Sign Language signing, but that’s cool, too?

    Like

  647. 651
    JCfromNC

    I would love, love, love to have the audio version of your book. Reading it while trying to imagine your voice just isn’t the same. :)

    Like

  648. That wig is amazingly crazy.

    And the audio, definitely the audio!!

    Like

  649. Audio please. And thank you.

    Like

  650. I would love to get the UK or Australian copy of your book! I just picked your book up from the library today and am eager to start it! I was on the wait list waaaaay too long. And I know I’m going to want to have my own copy to read when ever I want C=

    Like

  651. Audio all the way! Thanks for the giveaway and all my best on your continued tour and book success! :)

    Like

  652. audio!

    Like

  653. An Australian addition would be nice – that way I can pass it on to family and friends. I’ve got my copy already on the kindle! I heard someone on TV here in little old Tassie talking about her lady garden (she is an advertising person) and I laughed so hard. Wonder where she got it from ;) – Love the hysterical (historical?) wig!

    Like

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  654. Please please please [shameless begging] I would love a copy of your book!!! I’d rather have one I can hold in my hands than an audio book, though. I’m old-fashioned that way…

    Like

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  655. I’ve been anxiously waiting an appearance in my area! What I did NOT anticipate was that Watchung Booksellers would be charging “admission” in the form of the purchase of your book- which most fans (including myself) have already acquired. Worse, they’ll only offer autographs to books that were sold by Watchung Booksellers? How about first come, first served or some other vaguely fair system?

    You have a lot of fans that weren’t waiting for your appearance to purchase and read your debut. Shame on Watchung Booksellers for trying to take advantage and for being so unabashedly tacky. You are fantastic, but I will unfortunately have to miss you. Note to self: don’t patronize the grubby, grub-fest that is Watchung Booksellers.

    Like

    Abby Bean recently posted Does Starbucks Hate Vegans?.

  656. Things should have an even number of legs… 2, 4, 6, 8.

    3….Three is just tragic. Reminds me of my friend’s dog that lost a back leg to a raccoon (it was a really small dog). His name was Rexy. After the ‘incident’, everyone just called him tripod. Isnt that awful?! He did “ok” with only 3 legs; he hopped instead of walked, and he was still cute…. In my opinion though, a prosthetic leg would have made his life way easier, and let’s be honest here, a total badass! It sucks to have to hop EVERYWHERE. I mean seriously, try that for five minutes and you’ll be all “wow, this is way more aerobic than necessary and I … Screw this, I need a drink” See???

    Rexy was really missing that fourth leg, sure he got by and all, but that fourth leg was where he carried his mojo, his awesome, his swagger. His real leg was ripped out of his hip socket, but a fake one would have turned that story from sad to glad my friend. Your book tour is not dissimilar… It NEEDS to have four legs. And your missing leg is here in Canada. We are your book tour’s badass prosthetic. You need to come strap that bitch on.

    Like

  657. I love you, Jenny Lawson. That is all.

    Like

  658. So close to Minneapolis! I suppose that’s the same reason I should go to Chicago. But really, today was a great day, I quit my job and to celebrate bought your book. Burned dinner because I was laughing. Kids and husband asked “are you reading about that lady again?” if I had the audio book, I’d be able to feed my family. Seriously, I never burn dinner.

    Like

  659. uk version please! and also, please come back to san antonio. i just moved here, and was so sad that i missed your san antonio date by weeks! also, i found james garfield’s brother winston pinkerton III in a coffee shop in colorado. the pictures were…misplaced…in my move. but you will have them as soon as i find them again!

    Like

  660. Audio, pretty please with sugar and mushroom boobies on top!

    Like

  661. Oh, I’d LOVE to hear your stories done with an aussie accent!

    Like

  662. Audio! And I so wish you were making it out to the west coast!

    Like

  663. 667
    Donna in Austin

    No need to be witty. I imagine you are exhausted from your tour. If you have a spare book in any form I would love it. Thanks

    Like

  664. UK version, please!

    Like

  665. I would be thrilled with the audio verson!

    Like

  666. Oh please don’t trim the wig. It makes me laugh almost as hard as Juanita. Almost. :) Audio. And I will see you in Boston! YAY!

    Like

  667. ANY OF THEM! I want ANY version of your book I can possibly get! I would accept a free BRAILLE version and I have NO IDEA how to read braille! But I would learn if it meant I could have your book for free!

    Like

  668. P.S. Your pictures of Ron Weasely and Ermine Granger make me so happy! When are you getting a Harry Otter?

    Like

  669. Audio!

    Like

  670. Audio book! Also, that wig HAD to be that big so that it could hold all of the awesome that belongs to it.

    Like

  671. Would love the audio version! Because I know there are swear words in it and my kids need to learn some new words, or at least learn that other people swear too!
    You are awesome!

    Like

  672. Also nothing witty here. Audio, please.

    Also, Leg Four, Las Vegas? Pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaaase.

    Like

  673. Would love the Aus version as we are down under. Thanks for he laughs and sharing your world!

    Like

  674. UK version please. Love the book!

    Like

  675. Somebody prolly already told you that with that wig Ron Weasely looks more like Ginny Weasely, but if they didn’t – you’re welcome.

    Also I noticed you are STILL not coming anywhere near Utah. *SIGH*

    Like

  676. O.M.G. I totally knew it was you! You bought MY bug cemetary!
    I had been lusting after it for weeks and was trying to describe it to my friend Sheryl. And she said, “the bloggess must have made it” and I’m all “who is the bloggess?” and she says “you know, Juanita weasel!” and I’m all “huh?”. So she shows me your blog on Juanita, but THEN I read your blog on Copernicus and it was all I could think about or talk about for days. So I told everyone, “I am totally in love with this woman, because can you even imagine what it’s like in her head.” which made me start thinking that I really could stand for it to be more exciting in my head. So, I determined that I would treat myself to the bug cemetary I had been lusting after for months. But time passes and I hadn’t gotten back to Pasadena for awhile. THEN, my friend Sheryl calls me one day and said “the bloggess is writing about your bug dioramas, you have to go get the cemetary!” so I called the shop right then and I said ” I know there is going to be a run on bug dioramas so pleeeease hold the cemetary for me,” and she told me it had just been sold…..
    I was devastated, and I KNEW it was you. I KNEW it was you! But, then we thought, well, wouldn’t she have put up a picture of it? But my friend Sheryl, who is really the absolute best friend a person could have said she would help me make my own bug cemetary. So we started looking for what one might need to do so. And finally decided that what we would make would be so much better–a bug circus! So this weekend we went to a bug fair with Irina (I put my Copernicus poster in her office since mine is a little too public) and learned that you don’t really need appendage relaxing fluid, you can relax bugs quite easily with routine household chemicals and water (I figured you’d want to know that) and we got bugs and beetles and dragon flies for the circus. It may take a while, but it will be way cooler than your silly graveyard! And the ring master’s tails and top hat will be way cooler than the widow caterpillar’s little black veil and you will be so jealous!
    But I really can’t begrudge you the cemetary too much, because in a way, the cemetary is really what introduced you to me ( in a very indirect manner) so enjoy! And now I’ll have my own circus anyway!
    But I do think I at least deserve an Australian audio tape since you did totally rip off my bug cemetary after all!

    Like

  677. Oh, and I’ll take any version you are willing to give me, but would really appreciate the audio version. Please?

    Like

  678. When will the European leg of the book tour be?

    Like

  679. I’m reading your book now, and I never want it to end.

    (I would pick the UK version!)

    Like

  680. Have a good time on the last leg of your tour! Enjoy!

    Like

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  681. Soooo, is your daughter in therapy yet? She is going to have awesome stories to tell when she is older.

    Like

  682. I thought this post was called “Leg Tree!” but it’s still SUPER funny as-is. Are the UK and AU versions the same as ENG, just with things like “theatre” and “straight away” ? If so, sign me up for one of those. Or the audio one. I’m not picky.

    Like

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  683. UK version – because I like the front cover font waaaaaaaaay better than the US (aka boring) version.

    Like

  684. COME TO CANADA!! I have your book on hold at the library and there are hundreds of people ahead of me – Canadians love you! I’d love the UK version, what with our common usage of “u” in those special words like “colourful” and “favourite” and “well-hung”… No, wait… ;)

    Like

  685. audio

    And I hope you’ll return to LA – I missed it! : (

    Like

  686. Would love a copy of the Aussie version. Don’t suppose you’d come over and do a supporting tour? ;)

    Like

  687. Any version would be lovely :)

    Like

  688. Australian! Because I am! :-)

    Like

  689. I’d still love the audio version because nobody else ever talks to me. For realz! I only communicate with peeps online, the only person who EVER really *speaks* to me is my husband and you do don’t want that to be anyone’s fate. At least not if you know my husband or aren’t a sadist.

    Like

  690. Love your blog!
    Love your book!
    So any version of the audiobook would be great, but would prefer UK-version if it ever came to that. :-)

    Like

  691. Please please please I would love love love an AUSSIE one! Seriously, your blog posts make me laugh out loud so much that I can read them during my staff meetings anymore…it has made for many an AWKWARD moment.

    Like

  692. UK version – I can’t wait to hear the bathroom-rape story in a posh British accent. (Did you record the three audio books in accents yourself? Because that would make them even better!)
    (If you didn’t, you should really think about doing it!)

    Like

  693. audio, please! <3 <3 <3

    Like

  694. Audio!!!

    Like

    Jodi recently posted TIPA Awards 2012.

  695. UK Audio Oh Lovely person you.

    Then I can play it at my house when I’m in work so the out of work abandoned imaginary friends can be entertained.

    You know what happens if they are left to entertain themselves, yup, lost legs!!!

    Like

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  696. UK! UK! I deserve a book because I want to come see you and give you creepy cupcakes with rabbit’s feet and try to hug you before you escape to the bathroom and tweet everyone about the weird creeper who just tried to grab you, but I can’t because I live in Europe and you have selfishly neglected to expand your tour over here.

    We have bathrooms too, you know! And I’d even lend you a security wig. (You’d have the choice between the electric blue shaggy high ponytail one, the platinum blonde “down to my ass” one, or the boring black shoulder-length do. The purple bob is all mine.)

    Like

  697. Without the UK version I might just die. Do you really want that hanging over you?

    Like

  698. 702
    Threadless

    Hi jenny
    I just showed my son the Ron Weasel-y and Ermione Granger photo, and his reply was “well thats all very nice but where is Harry Otter” HARRY OTTER! You just gotta love this kid, (well he is 23 but he’s still my baby!) So I’m now keeping an eye out for a myopic taxidermied otter with a lightning flash scar just for you x.
    Ooh I’d love an audio copy of your book

    Like

  699. I would love the Australian version. Has it changed so that there are now taxidermied kangaroos or whatever?

    Like

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  700. There’s an Australian version?! Oh please, please please please please! That way your humour can spread here to New Zealand, to the ass end of the earth!

    Like

  701. Ok, even though you don’t have to make up anything to me personally, for I still think the picture of Ron Weasley is entertaining enough without any of your witty words, I WOULD FRIGGIN’ LOVE LOVE LOVE AN AUDIO VERSION OF YOUR BOOK! I own your book with book plate, had you sign my book in San Rafael (Not like you probably care, but I want to add some flair here-so don’t pronounce the name of the city like most people do, San Rah-fell, but say it seductively instead with a Spanish/Mexican accent (whichever you prefer, I’m not picky on that point), San Rah-fiye-el, and roll that r there baby)! That night I saw you read from your book was THAT exciting for me, so I felt a need to convey that by saying the name of the city all special like. Did it work? I had 2 friends come that had never heard of you and we were laughing our asses off, not literally thank god! I was actually crying I might add, not ’cause I was sad of course, but you were, friggin’ hilarious! I would love to hear you read your book out loud to me whenever I so chose! You’d help lift my spirits any time of the day if I had my hot little hands on it! For a couple of months there I was listening to David Sedaris audio version of him reading his book, “Me Talk Pretty One Day” before I’d go to bed. I don’t know if helped me go to sleep, but at least I wasn’t thinking/obsessing about my life. I was thinking of buying the audio version but I’m a bit on the poor side right now and am not suppose to be spending more money on things, but like, trying to pay my credit card off, you know I bet how that goes! Help me laugh harder and more often Bloggess! Is it helping to plead my case? Not sure how you’re going to chose on this one! I LOVE YOU!! IN A FRIENDLY SISTERLY WAY!! THOUGH I COULD PROBABLY LOVE YOU MORE IN AN INTIMATE WAY IF NEED BE. My boyfriend might not approve though, so I proably can’t jump right into that latter possible proposal w/out consent. In case you’re wondering. Have fun on the 3rd leg!! I’m going to tell my friends in Mass. & Chicago to go see you if they want to laugh there asses off, but not literally of course!

    Like

  702. UK would be great!

    Like

  703. Australian! Because that’s what I am!

    Like

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  704. 708
    Johnners

    Magnificent!
    I think Ron suits being a bit … Charles II – in fact we should all try it, apart from the hiding in Oak trees business, of course. I would love to get the UK version, but don’t worry about sending it really, because I’m going to buy it anyway. J x

    Like

  705. Hehe it totally looks like Ron’s cosplaying as River Song! How fabulous of him!

    Like

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  706. 710
    VaileyGirl

    I want the UK book! Love the whimsy!

    Like

  707. 711
    Kelli Kostopolus

    I would love to go see in Chicago but I have to catch the train back to Kansas City around 2pm. :( Any chance you could do a Leg 4 and come visit here?

    Like

  708. I’d really love a copy of the Aussie edition, please! Ha. ‘Cause of like, national pride and all that. :)

    The first time I read it wrong and thought the audio was you doing an Australian accent… which would have been odd. But you should totally attempt an Australian accent and record it just for me. :D

    Like

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  709. Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian! Australian!

    Like

  710. 714
    Victoria

    I am soooooo psyched you’re coming to Boston. Brookline Booksmith here we come!!!

    Like

  711. Oh, I’m glad the scarf works on Ron – wasn’t sure of Weasel proportions. It also helps balance out his new hair. I do have the desire to start singing “Chaka Khan, Chaka Khan, let me rock you Chaka Khan”. I’m not sure why.

    Would be happy to make another for Ermione (and a Slytherin one for Draco Mousefoy when he comes into your possession.)

    Lastly, thanks for saying friend and not “somewhat stalkerish FB, Twitter and Blog participant”. :)

    Like

    Kara recently posted Boys Don’t Lie, A History of Shoes.

  712. 716
    MikeRich

    Audio UK version please – then I can walk the streets laughing and saying ‘vagina’ in hideously inappropriate places. Do you do the accent as well?

    Like

  713. Soooo awesome. Can’t WAIT til you make it on a UK book tour…

    Would love a UK version of the book pretty please? (with sugar, sprinkles, chocolate coating, cherries, and whatever else floats your boat)

    Like

  714. Hopefully not too late but would love the Aussie version! Have read your book already – much to the confusion of my husband. He woke up one evening thinking he was in some sordid hotel room the bed was vibrating that much. Turned out of course it was me reading while trying to stifle my laughing and not wake him! I really want to introduce your book to a friend but my husband is not prepared yet to part with my own copy so the Aussie or the audio version on offer would be the best pressie.

    Like

  715. I would love the audio!!!! And thanks for popping into MD!

    Like

  716. I’m an Australian so you should definitely give the Australian version to me – extend your fan base and all that. Oh, and if you do I’ll get my book club to read it for our next book and you’ll sell another 8 copies. Thanks.

    Like

  717. Aussie for an aussie! Would be lovely thank you.
    Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi!!!
    xx

    Like

  718. You should really come to St. Louis, it’s not that far from Chicago. Ah well, Audio version since you aren’t coming this way. Congrats on the book!

    Like

  719. I would LOVE an audio book!

    Like

  720. Please come to Philadelphia! I’m reading your book and loving it. Would love to meet you!

    Like

  721. Aaaaaaaah UK version pleeeease!

    Like

  722. Audio Please : ) P.s. I just finished your book (hardcopy style) and it was amazing. My hubby kept getting mad at me b/c I would read him passages when he was trying to fall asleep.

    Like

  723. Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh! I don’t care which one I receive unless you do cute little British or Australian accents… then I want one of those! :)

    Like

  724. Audio please! I have the kindle version but need something awesome to listen to in the car.

    Like

  725. Audio! Audio! Audio! I heard the snippet and I really want to hear the rest. Reading it was awesome as well. So was having a book plate to put in it. But come on- who could pass up audio!

    Like

  726. UK book would be cool, thanks.

    Like

  727. OOOh, That could be Ron Weasely’s confused college years where he went by Rhonda Weasly and worked the pole for tuition money. Oh, and I would like a copy of the audio book!

    Like

  728. 732
    Tina aka Aunt Looney

    I would like the Australian version. Is there a kangaroo inside? That would be cool!

    Attention Bloggess Fans: If you are anywhere close to where she is going on her tour, you should make every effort to do so! My wonderful husband drove me to Atlanta to hear her speak. You have to hear HER say, “KKMF!” She signed my book, my Bloggess Cootie Catcher, AND she signed my library’s copy of the book. (It was OK to do for my library book because I am THE Most High Exalted Ruler of the Books at my library). GO SEE JENNY!!! ***

    ***Does sucking up increase my chances to win? :-)

    Like

  729. Ron Weasely be Rasta, mohn?

    Like

    hogsatemysister recently posted Crack Puppy Missing in Action.

  730. So, do you have an Australian Audio version? Wouldn’t that be funny, to hear your story with an Australian accent? Or a British accent, either way… anyway, I like the cover to your British copy so if I get it, I’d LOVE that one!

    Like

    Michelle G recently posted Apple Pie and Shit Part Duex....

  731. Oh, the UK version is pretty! I just finished reading the good old US version from my library, and I spent so much time laughing out loud that the people that were around me thought I was nuts.

    Like

  732. 736
    ClaireClaire

    UK version pretty-please.

    now to figure out how to get myself to chicago……

    Like

  733. The wig is totally suited for Ermione… Just saying. :) Would love the UK version of your book. And have fun with the rest of your tour!

    Like

    Nat recently posted Fashion interpreted.

  734. Dye the wig brown it would be perfect for Ermione…:)

    Like

  735. The audio version, please! The extras sound cool. Also, I understand your issues with the wig. He looks a little more like a fabulous Ronda in a flowing black robe than the Ron we all know and love. Which isn’t a bad thing, per se, but it does screw with the “historical accuracy” of having stuffed carnivores play imaginary human characters.

    Like

  736. There is no need to apologize! We don’t expect you to be witty alllllll the time. Just most of the time. :-P If it makes you feel better, you can give me a copy of your audiobook!

    Like

  737. May I please have the audio version?? I have a 2 hour commute to work and this would help me start and end my day on a good note. Thanks!!! It was great getting to meet you in Atlanta.

    Like

  738. I would like the uk version. Like the title. But if you have to give me another, I’ll take it. I would say I’m not too picky, but I’d be lying. Autographed too?

    Like

  739. I would love a UK copy! BTW- your blog makes me day! I have shared with numerous people and now we are all hooked. It never disappoints.
    The wig is perfect, and a lovely shade of red i might add.

    thanks!

    Like

  740. I would love the audio version. Being from Houston myself I knew when I first read you (an Australian friend living in Australia sent me your blog link) that you had to be a Texas girl. I was blown away when I found out you were! Texas rocks!

    Like

  741. i don’t know how you have managed this extended book tour…. and apparently with grace and (of course) your sense of humor intact. i believe I would have been babbling in the back of the biographical section of some bookstore long before now. You are definitely my hero. And if this blatant, unabashed sucking up works, I’ll get an audio edition, cause I loved the book.

    Sincerely,
    Your sister in bread-bag socks. (We wore them INSIDE the boots) :D

    Like

  742. Would LOVE to have an audio book – it will be for my hubby!! Having picked up the book at your Atlanta book signing (at least it’s not towels!!), I’ve read several chapters to my non-book-reading husband (he only listens to audio books). His comment – it must be true ’cause you can’t make this stuff up! :)

    And if you pick me (pretty, pretty please???), would you autograph it with “at least it’s not an enormous metal chicken”??

    Like

  743. Australian…I can’t wait to hear the stories of West Texas in your best Australian accent! I won’t be disappointed will I?

    Like

  744. 748
    Wombatish

    The UK edition please! Cause bitches gotta have whimsy.

    Seriously though, feel better and give your brain some reboot time when you can!!

    Like

  745. UK version please. Hope you feel like yourself soon.

    Like

  746. Audio! :)

    Like

    Heather recently posted Teeth!.

  747. UK please! And an even bigger please-please come to DC for your book tour!!!

    Like

  748. I would LOVE the audiobook!

    Like

  749. I would love an audio version of your book…at times I have a hard time reading your blog because of the tears from laughing so hard. I would really love to hear your read the book. I could use the laughter these days.

    Like

  750. Hello,
    Australian version, please. I was just introduced to you today, so i’m not sure which is better, but I do love that Australian accent just in case.

    Like

  751. 755
    Jennifer

    I would love to have the audio book. I finished reading the book and LOVED IT! I would like to hear you read it. :-) Good luck on the third leg.

    Like

  752. I’d like the Austrailian UK version of the audio book, please.

    Duke

    Like

  753. 757
    Kat Black

    UK version please! It’s so pretty . . .

    Like

  754. If enough of us ask for the Aussie version, does that mean you’ll do a book tour here? I would love an Australian copy.

    Like

  755. 759
    elizabeth

    audio books in foreign accents? love it!

    Like

  756. I keep trying to get my partner to read your book. He refuses to read books. He would love you, so I’m thinking audio book is the way to go….pppllllllllllllllleeeassse. ( ps I totally did that Roger Rabbit style in my head )

    Like

  757. Sometimes, when I’m not feeling myself I try to figure out who I’m feeling like…that usually lasts for about 5 seconds and then I think, “man, the person I’m feeling like asks stupid questions.” And then I take a nap or eat cookies…

    I would love love love the UK version!

    Like

  758. 762
    mom#to#three

    Audio! Only because you are the reader!

    Like

  759. OMG I would love a copy of the UK version of your book!

    Like

  760. Damn it! Stupid work schedule keeping me from spending any time on line and from being able to get tickets to your Chicago event! Will you be do any book signing or anything for us poor, hard working, ticketless slobs? *pouty face*

    Like

  761. 765
    Some Other Jennifer

    Aaaaaauuudiiiiiiooooooo. Audio, pls. Congratulations on all your well-deserved success. Now every time Victor complains about you being on the internet and twitter and whatnot all day, you can shove your NY Times Best-Selling memoir in his face and point out that what you are doing is building and maintaining your fan base. You know, your base of fans who buy your book and pay for all your taxidermy and metal work. I would say your fan base who put food on your table, but I can’t help thinking most of your book income is going to go into procuring a family for Beyonce.

    Like

  762. Audio book please!!!

    Like

  763. AUDIO AUDIO AUDIO! I have the kindle version and am LOVING it right now. I keep reading it over dinner or a glass of wine in restaurants and people staaaare at me when I’m snorting wine through my nose in public. Yeah maybe I shouldn’t do that anymore. Hence why I need the audio version so I can spew Coke Zero across my windshield instead of wine. Don’t drink and drive, y’all.

    Like

  764. 768
    Trixie in Dixie

    My daughter and I came to see you in Atlanta and laughed the entire time! We are both reading your book and decided, after hearing you read a chapter, that the only thing better than READING you is LISTENING TO YOU READ! We have a 10 hour car trip coming up and having the audio book would be go great.

    thx.

    Like

  765. 769
    Some Other Jennifer

    You know, I don’t usually read your other commenters, because there are tons and frankly there aren’t enough hours in the day for that. So I get this terrible feeling that every time I post a comment that seems funny to me, 2 or 3 dozen other people have probably already posted very nearly the same thing.

    It’s like the monkeys and the typewriters and the Shakespeare: Given a few thousand people with similar taste in blogs who’ve all read your entire body of work, some of them are going to end up having the same reaction to your posts. And some of them are going to feel the need to tell you and everybody else about it. Because deep down, we’re all a bunch of shameless attention whores. We should be a sports team. Go S.A.W.s!!

    Like

  766. 770
    Some Other Jennifer

    Awww man, this is the first time since I quit working for the screen printing company (and the crazy, vindictive lady who ran it) that I’ve wished I was still there. Just so I could make us some S.A.W.s jerseys. I’m friends with the people who bought the company, maybe they’ll cut me a deal.

    Like

  767. Audio very would make my summer road trip SO MUCH MORE SPECIAL. I’ll be able to force it upon my girlfriend (in a non violent way, of course), and get her to understand why I keep peeing the bed from laughter every night (I don’t pee the bed, I just giggle a bit too hard to where it feels like I will).

    Either way – I’m glad this book is a thing. I’m glad it’s out. I’m glad YOU’RE out (on book tour).

    Love,
    Kasey

    Like

    Kasey @ The Wit of the Staircase recently posted Bon Appetite!.

  768. Alas you’re coming close to my area but even though I feel like we’re secretly mental illness twins or at least equally “special” third cousins, my anxiety doesn’t let me travel more than an hour from my home on my own. My annoyingly wonderful husband doesn’t think seeing you after a 6+ hour car drive constitutes an awesome slightly early anniversary present, sigh. I’m glad your tour is winding up though. Wish I could’ve come but I’ll send you tour well wishes and hopes for awesome presents from fans who do make it.

    Like

  769. Ooooh, the Australian one!! I already have a copy, but i figure you can never have too many :-D plus then i can gift one to my sister!

    Like

  770. You have lots of Aussie fans! I would love the Australian version – thanks!
    I can’t think of anything witty to say here either but I always look forward to reading your blog always – thankyou for writing!

    Like

  771. I can’t believe you’re missing on the middle of the country? You don’t want to visit Kansas? Did you know that the state has been scientifically proven to be flatter than a pancake? AND, you can see the world’s largest ball of twine? You know that you want to come here and add another leg to your tour.

    Oh, and I’d love to audio version of the book.

    Like

  772. feel better dear Jenny!
    You just made my day. In my area, Boston, on June 8th- my birthday?! There is NO better gift.

    Like

  773. I would love the audio book, please! I would love to share you with my husband! ……wait,…… :-)

    Like

  774. audio…. unless the Australian one comes in an Australian accent…

    Like

  775. I’ve already read the e-book and my friend listened to the audible, I now need the audible to learn about being an icee barista! I need a new career goal.

    Like

  776. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! You’re coming to Chicago!!!!! YAYAYAYAYAY!!

    Like

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  777. I’d love the UK version! I was born in England and have dual citizenship; so British me could politely chuckle while reading it and look disdainfully at the American me rolling on the floor laughing. :)

    Like

  778. That wig almost made me spit out my coffee, so I’d say your work is done for the day!

    Like

  779. I have no idea if you will read the comments all the way down here to 740ish. Or is it 740ump-te-ump? 740 comments seem a lot to me. 740 seems like a large number all by itself. Also an unusual number. nothing comes with 740 parts or pieces. after wasting some minutes, but much less than 740, I found that MapQuest shows I can drive 740 miles from my house to Quebec City, Canada. It seems like a nice place and worth the 740 miles. I would rather go to Australia, though. Or at least first. if I start driving from my home in Northern Virginia toward Australia, 740 miles from my house brings me to DeKalb, Illinois. I am not sure I want to go there. Do I? My trip to Australia is 15,555 miles according to Google. I had to switch to Google as MapQuest was being a snob and wouldn’t let me go there. Google is much cooler with the whole trip to Australia. Secretly, it may want to go there, too. But first I need to get a kayak, ’cause Google told me that when I got to the West Coast I will need to kayak 2,756 miles to Hawaii. Now, THAT seems like a large number. In a kayak. Would you join me? When I saw you at the B&N bookstore in Annapolis earlier this week, I thought to myself that you had strong arms. I bet you could row that shit out of that kayak. and truthfully, I could use the help. I have a back injury that has flared up, and I had to take some vicodin this morning. Can you tell? When we get to Adelaide –that’s in South Australia- I could introduce you to my friends Revenge and Ouranos. We met online playing this online game online. It is called Ikariam, but I don’t know how to say it. Oddly enough, since it’s played online, did I mention that part? And no one ever meets anyone else in person; we don’t actually know how it’s pronounced. I say I-car-I-am. They say its ick-ah-rim. I just think they’re wrong. Ouranos is a nurse and Revenge is a dietician. And they’re dudes. And in the game they are berserker-crazy, rampaging, rage-pillage-plunder, leave no one behind alive kind of guys. And then Ouranos goes home in his yellow car and grows grapes in his backyard. And Rev has 3 kids. He sent me a picture of his littlest one. I know all this ‘cause I’m the kind of gamer who likes to chat and offer you a digital Oreo and Pepsi while I bash your castle walls down. I’m ladylike that way. So I think it would be a great thing to take your book on our kayak expedition to South Australia to meet my gamers friends. We could drink Aussie beer and I would bring the Oreos. Double stuff, of course. How many can we fit in the kayak?

    Like

  780. Yay!! You’re coming to NJ!! Psyched! Where can I find a metal chicken by June 6??

    Like

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  781. I would LOVE the audio version!

    Like

  782. 786
    Dana Laviano

    I’d love the audio version for my commute! Thank you. Cheers!

    Like

  783. Try the little wig on Ermine Granger!!!! Ron Weasely’s already a ginger, but she needs the wild hair.

    (I’ve read the book already, so if I win, draw again!)

    Like

  784. I’d like the UK version.

    Like

  785. 789
    Stephanie

    Audio! Audio! I am bummed that previous commitments prevented me from attending your reading at BookPeople in Austin.

    Like

  786. I would adore the audio version. :)

    Like

  787. I would love love love a UK version please, not for me but to give to my friends because I want everyone I know to read it but do not want to give my version away as will never see it again I fear x

    Like

  788. OOOoooo an Australian audio book??? Just kidding, but no.
    No, I’m not.
    I will settle for just an audio book though.

    Like

  789. I would be so insanely thrilled to get an Australian copy. Being Australian and all. Also, I’m a vet student so I am totally there with you on the dead animal thing – although I study them, rather than collect them. My friends and I have started a skull collection which is going well. Instead of dressing up the skulls; instead I just dress up my own live pet dog. She recently got a brown coat with a poppable collar that makes her look like dr who. We’re going to dress up my housemates cat like the tardis. Oh, have I mentioned that in between hating exams and assignments that I laugh myself sick over your blog. You are part of the net that keeps me sane. So, um, G’day mate. No worries. Xx

    Like

  790. 794
    Katie Rose

    If I win, I’d like a UK version of the book please!

    Like

  791. I’m itching for the audio version of your book. It’s almost like I got into some poison ivy.

    Like

  792. But what size wig does he wear? Does it have one of the good elastic wig caps? You know you gotta give him the best. Also, your Pullips are making me want to break into a new hobby and BJD’s already have me strapped, yo.

    *cough* BUT I’d love any hard copy of your book I could get my hands on. >.>

    Like

    AgonyOfSlumber recently posted 03.09.2012.

  793. You need to extend the tour and swing through Minneapolis after Chicago…I would love to see you in person!!

    I would love a copy of the audio version of the book.

    Like

  794. Audio please!

    Like

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  795. I’ll be there in Chicago with bells on! YIPPY!

    Like

  796. Australian. Does it come with a lovely accent?

    Like

    Justine recently posted Neighbor drama…mama…something.

  797. You are loved, even when you’ve nothing witty to say. Thanks for YOU!
    (audio, please & thank you)

    Like

  798. Audio version please

    Like

  799. The UK version!

    Like

    Trish recently posted France - 8/30/00.

  800. Annnnd the Chicago tickets are all sold out.

    Like

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  801. I would LOVE the Australian version!

    Like

  802. 806
    Mark Berlowitz

    We love you Jenny, hoping you feel more like your self soon. As for the book, I’d take an audio copy.

    Like

  803. Audiobook, for sure! But I’m going to need you to deliver it to me in that Ron Weasley wig.

    Like

    Kerry recently posted Paella and the Perils of Shopping for Fish in Spain.

  804. 808
    Christine Brubaker

    Perhaps it should be Hermione’s wig. It looks a lot like her hair and could easily be dyed.

    Like

  805. CHICAGO!! Do you know if one needs a ticket to the event to come and visit? :)

    Also, since it seems to be a thing, audio? :D

    Like

  806. so happy you’re going to be at Printer’s Row. That’s great.

    Like

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  807. 811
    Jenny Thelen

    I would LOVE to receive any copy of your book!

    Like

  808. With that wig, it must be Ron and Hermoine’s son….because that’s his color and her frizz.

    And I still don’t see Minnesota on that list. Hmmmmmm. Are you boycotting this state because you think it’s too nice? Let me disabuse you of the notion; Minnesota Nice is propaganda with no basis in reality.

    You should come and see for yourself. I’m just sayin’……….

    Like

    sj recently posted Are You Now Or Have You Ever Been A Uterist.

  809. 813
    Heather B

    I would love a copy of the UK version!!

    Like

  810. Boo. I wanted to go to the Boston/Brookline signing and, of course, I have to work both jobs that day. I am sad now. :( Please come to Albany, NY.

    Like

  811. I’m an aspiring blogger, and comedian! I’m relocating away from rural NY to even more rural West Virginia next month and would love the audio book for my long drive! As a young woman who suffers from panic attacks and OCD, I find myself relating to you. Your book had me laughing so much, I almost peed (yep, too much info there). You really are a role model to me! Thank you so much for your blogging and your book, because I now know I too can grow up into a ballsy, kickass woman.

    Like

  812. It appears that you borrowed the wig from Twisted Sister Dee Snider’s rejected wig collection.

    Like

  813. 817
    Kristina Singleton

    I would love a copy of the audio version! This made my day, obviously.

    Like

  814. I would love anything you gave me. Ever. But, in the interest of this giveaway, I choose the audiobook.
    AUDIOBOOK! (That was me putting it out into the universe.)

    Like

  815. 819
    jenny (not you, me)

    I have the audio already. Would love it in print too. Aussie? UK? Sure!

    Like

  816. It looks like a wig for Ginny, not Ron. I think having the Audio version would be awesome!

    Like

  817. I agree, that’s definitely Ginny’s wig. But it’s definitely excellent! Also….I think the audio version would be so stellar. I’m moving states in a month and having that for my partner and I to listen to would be super fun. He watched me laugh constantly as I read your book, and I read some parts out loud to him, but it’s just not the same coming out of my mouth..

    Like

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  818. Audio – And you on an off day is still better than most!

    Like

  819. 823
    Evan Middleton

    Argh! Only saw this this morning, and tickets were apparently sold out by last night!

    I was so stoked!

    And now I’m so down…

    Sigh.

    Like

  820. Personally, I just like the title “Leg Three.” wink, wink. nudge, nudge. UK version, pretty please. [loved seeing you in San Antonio!]

    Like

  821. I already have your book. But I just loved hearing you read from it when you were in Concord, NC, so it would be awesome to have the audio version!

    Like

  822. 826
    Jennifer

    Australian!! By the way, the knitted scarf is pretty and I love the wig. I have a friend who can knit you a booby or uterus, you know, just in case you need an extra one.
    P.S. please come to Seattle!!!!!

    Like

  823. 827
    heathermac

    Since I already have the hard copy, audio! It will go in my ‘go to sleep listening to’ pile with D.Sedaris and C.Handler.

    Like

  824. The Australian copy would be fun to have. Thank you for the opportunity!
    Ron looks ready for the opera.

    Like

  825. UK, please, since that is where I live!!!

    Like

  826. I’m still not seeing Oklahoma City on the list. What does a girl have to do? Knit you another wig? Because I’ll do it. It won’t be pretty, but I’ll do it.

    Like

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  827. Audiobook please! Minneapolis isn’t that far from Chicago, could you please swing up here? It’s not snowing…

    Like

  828. Need some help from others who have read Let’s Pretend This Never Happened. I suggested that my book club read this book, and now I need some talking points.

    Thanks!!!

    Like

  829. Ron Weasley should keep his badass ‘fro! Just imagine how much depth his character could’ve had with that added awesomeness!

    I’d still love a UK version of your book :)

    Like

  830. Audio! Reading your book was funny enough to make me cry, so I imagine hearing it will make me pee my pants. Note to self: remember to put plastic down on the furniture.

    Like

  831. OMFG THAT WIG. IS. AMAZING.

    I’d love an audiobook version. :)

    Like

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  832. I would love the audio version. Your book would be great for road trips!

    Like

    Megan recently posted My husband has issues.

  833. Audio book! Please dear god give me the audio book!

    Also, kindly add Kansas to your book tour!!! Please please please!

    Like

    Rachel recently posted Read this Book! Seriously! DO IT!.

  834. Audio Book would be great. Not having the best day myself. Having a hiding in the bathroom kind of day. But I learned from you that depression is a lying bastard. Hope things will look up. Thanks for your blog and book. They help me remember I am not alone with my depression.

    Like

  835. I’m no surprised your low on wit. You’ve been “on” forever. Just a little more and then you’ll be home for some much deserved R&R. Hang in there young one.

    Like

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  836. I would love the UK version pretty please! I have the audio book and LOVE it!

    Like

  837. Audio please :)

    Like