BUY MY BIRDFEEDERS

On March 4th the paperback version of my book comes out.  It’s cheaper than the hardback and it has an extra chapter – which seems sort of unfair to those of you who bought the hardback – but on the plus side, you can buy the paperback, read the extra chapter (and the book club questions) and then give it to your fucked-up friend who probably needs it, or just leave it on the plane for the next unsuspecting passenger.

EVERYONE WINS.

The book comes out in a few weeks and you can order it now at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, BooksAMillion, Target, IndieBound and more.

As I understand it, the new chapter is only in the American (checking on Canada now) paperback version so far but as a thank-you to everyone who has read the book or who plans on buying the paperback (THANK YOU!) I’m randomly giving away a bunch of Bloggess Geek-a-Week trading cards signed by me that you can use as bookmarks.  Just leave a comment and I’ll contact you if you win.

Also, in case you missed it, I’m going back on tour.  Last time I was on tour I got a brain in a jar and someone left a kitten on my table and we all had to be really quiet so that we wouldn’t wake it up (the kitten…not the brain).  Also, I gave a reading to several people in the Costco parking lot.  It was pretty glamorous.  You should come.  Seriously.  Please.  Don’t make me do this alone.

The Tour So Far:

March 5 ~ Paramus, NJ Barnes & Noble, 7pm

March 6 ~ NYC, Upper West Side Barnes & Noble, 7pm

March 7 ~ Chicago, Anderson’s Bookshop, 7pm

March 8 ~ St. Louis, MO, Left Banks Books “Drink Out”, 7pm

March 18 ~ Louisville, KY Barnes & Noble, 7pm

March 19 ~ Dayton, OH Books & Co., 7pm

March 20 ~ Cincinnati, OH Joseph-Beth Booksellers, 7pm

March 21 ~ Kansas City, MO, Rainy Day Books, 7pm

April 1 ~ San Francisco, CA, Books Inc. (in the Marina), 7pm

April 2 ~ Danville, CA Rakestraw, 7pm

April 3 ~ San Jose, CA Barnes & Noble, 7pm

April 4 ~ Phoenix, AZ Barnes & Noble, 7pm

PS.  Thank you.  Seriously.  Thank you to every single one of you who supported the book, told others about it, bought it for friends, asked for it at your library, shoplifted it, etc.  Because of your support the book has been made available around the world and I’m still getting emails from people whose lives were changed when they realized they weren’t alone in thinking they were a strange misfit.  None of this would have happened without you.  Thank you.

UPDATED:  15 winners have been notified, but I’ll be bringing a big stack of these cards with me on tour to give out as long as they last.  Please come see me?

1,071 replies. read them below or add one

  1. If I win, I’ll forgive you for not coming to Philadelphia. Maybe.

    Like

    Daddy Scratches recently posted And then I got into a political argument with Boston Red Sox pitching legend Curt Schilling.

  2. YAY Paperback! I like the idea of leaving it for an unsuspecting…i mean the next person on the plane or train.

    Like

  3. OOh! I want a geek-a-week card! Neat! Exclamation points are nifty!

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  4. I love the book! I’m hoping to make it to the Kansas City book signing:)

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  5. Why have I not seen these cards before? They are the best.

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  6. Ooh, that would be an excellent bookmark!

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  7. OMG they are like Garbage Pail Kids of 2013. Love.

    Like

    ilikebeerandbabies.com recently posted Body by Baby.

  8. I love your book!

    Like

  9. There is this little place called Europe….can u be kind and come for a tour here?
    Got your book and you got at least 3 fans here.

    Like

  10. I saw you on your “hardcover” tour in NJ. (With Rosie O’Donnell) I would love a bookmark!

    Like

  11. I loved the book so much. And I got to recommend it to several people that loved it (including my crush), so we all win.

    Like

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  12. Best bookmark ever. I’ve already re-purchased the paperback so that I can meet you in person at your signing. Yay!

    Like

  13. Geek-a-Week trading cards!!!!

    I still need to send one of the previous cards to my friend in AK, so she can get it signed for me by Marian Call herself.

    Did I mention I really really want one, even if maybe I already have this whole set already?

    Please

    Like

    Random Michelle recently posted I Just Wrote An Amazon Review.

  14. I am super stoked about paperback. Paperback books don’t leave marks when my brother mocks me for reading paperback.

    GET EXCITED.

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  15. If I tell you I get the obscure title reference, will you come do a signing in Fargo?

    Like

    Kari recently posted I forgot I’m not supposed to be allowed in the kitchen.

  16. 16
    Kellee Peters

    I am just so excited you are coming to Cincinnati!!! I have the book on Kindle but will of course be buying the paperback version (extra chapter? Hells yeah!!)

    The only question left is what sort of odd thing can I give to you when you’re here…

    Like

  17. I’ve started telling people that I’m you, since you’re never anywhere near me when you are touring. So we’ve never been seen together, I’m the Clark Kent to your Superman.

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  18. Yesssssss bookmark cards!! I bought my book way back when and have a signed bookplate, so these would add to my creepy Bloggess shrine.

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  19. Jenny! Congrats on the paperback! I bought the hardback😦 (JK!) Much luck and have fun (?) at your readings!

    Like

  20. I loved it! I read it on my Kindle and laughed so hard before going to sleep the bed would shake and my husband would eye me suspiciously. When I would try to explain what was so funny, it never translated quite right. Finally, he got around to it and then I was the one annoyed by the bed jiggling. Bet you never thought of your book as a bed jiggler! Thanks for your honest and funny writing. I see myself reading it again down the road and discovering new things that I can connect to.

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    Meg Griswold recently posted Garden work.

  21. I hope it is in the Canadian edition! And I wish you would come on tour to Canada. You should come to Saskatoon. We are the fastest growing city in Canada and Marilyn Manson puked and collapsed here. We’re special.

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  22. I’ve read the book and got others to read the book. Will even try to make it to one of your signings as I have reserved the paperback immediately upon knowing it will be released.

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  23. Geek-a-week trading cards…so delicious

    Like

  24. I bought the hardcover because I wanted an in-person one, but also bought the Kindle because sometimes I’m too lazy to hold open a book.
    And sometimes because I needed a free hand to stop the pee from coming out.

    Like

    Dangerous Lilly recently posted Sex Blogger Education: Content Theft and DMCA Takedowns.

  25. I still haven’t gotten to read your book. A friend bought it for me for Christmas, but when she mailed it, it was stolen out of the mail. So I await the opportunity to read it. Maybe now that it’s coming out paperback I can eventually afford it.

    Like

  26. Would love to have a signed trading card, to go with my signed hardcover.

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    Robin recently posted Hi.

  27. Will it update with the new chapter?

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  28. Oh and PS, I am totally buying the paperback, even though I already own it the hardcover and the Kindle version, because I am a book hoarder.

    Like

    Kari recently posted I forgot I’m not supposed to be allowed in the kitchen.

  29. And it took me 1.5 seconds to regret saying that. NEW RECORD.

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    Dangerous Lilly recently posted Sex Blogger Education: Content Theft and DMCA Takedowns.

  30. BWAHAHA! Love them all, but the Wil Wheton card’s aces! LOL!

    Like

  31. I would love to win because I’ve always had card envy of my husband, whose mother never threw out any of his stuff. He still has his baseball cards. I’d love to win your cards, because I’d feel as awesome as he does then.😉

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  32. Most definitely going to get the new book. Probably going to read the chapter, then leave it in a public bathroom for the enjoyment of others. Probably a target bathroom, because im afraid walmarts a bit too illiterate.

    Also, you need to come to utah. I promise you wont go home a sister wife, unless youre into stuff like that.

    Like

  33. 33
    Sarah Ferguson

    Oo! Please may I win because my Wnglish husband is convinced I’m you in disguise in London, and since I can’t get your new paperback here (hardback copy nearly destroyed with love already) I think these cards to let me read your book again whole I wait patiently for the UK to catch up is more than fair. Pleeeaasse?! Smooches!

    Like

  34. NEEDING the cards. NEED.

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  35. You should make the extra chapter available as a mini e-book:) I’d totally buy that shit!

    Like

  36. I love this. I love your book. And I love that you have a Geek-of-the-Week card.

    Hawt hawt, motherfucker.

    Like

    Robin2go recently posted Keeping a boy’s dream alive..

  37. Would love a bookmark. Already have it on hardback, ordered it on paperback for the Kansas City signing.

    Like

  38. I just finished your book last night. Had to stay up till 1 am because there was just no good stopping point. Wish you could come up to Canada for your book tour, I’d love to meet you.

    Like

    Lynnea L Taylor recently posted Conversations with my Husband.

  39. I so need these cards!

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  40. Having your trading cards would help make up for the fact that my mom got rid of the Star Wars trading cards I had when I was a kid. I had a paper bag full of them in the garage! (And I ate all the gum even though it was disgusting.)

    Like

    Observacious recently posted List 31: People born in 1973.

  41. okay, now I need to buy the paperback…or maybe like 6 copies…just so I can leave them in random places!

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  42. The only way this book gets better is if you are the bookmark. PICK MY NAME!!! :) I would love this. As much as I love you, even. xoxo

    Like

  43. Never laughed so hard reading a book… EVER! Of course then I felt guilty over laughing so hard reading a book. I even recommended your book to friends and I almost never do that. Congrats on your success. I know by being so open and honest about your life you have helped countless people through theirs.

    Like

  44. Damn you marketing type ppls for adding something new to the paperback! *giggles*

    I❤ your card so hard! My Sonic hair dryer…

    Also I give what's the birdfeeder? I could only think of rat race and the squirrel lady… I don't know why.

    Like

  45. I will definitely have to buy the paperback, too, ’cause NEW CHAPTER! BOOK CLUB QUESTIONS! WOO!!!!

    Like

  46. Miffed once again that somehow New Zealand has been omitted from your book tour itinerary. Something we said?

    Like

  47. I am so looking forward to this. You, through both the blog and the book, have made me feel like a misfit who actually belongs. My family isn’t all that pleased with the new found interest on odd taxidermy though. (Did you know AMC has a show on competitive taxidermy? I’ve got to check it out.)

    Like

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  48. I could use your trading card as a bookmark for my Bible. Because you’re just like Mother Teresa, only better.

    Like

  49. I have the audio book version from Audible.com. Where does that stand on the extra chapter front?

    Also… trading cards! Cool!

    Like

    Wilhelm Arcturus recently posted Kill of the Day – The Cliff Diving BDR G1B.

  50. I might be that asshole who just reads the extra chapter in the bookstore. Ok, probably not. #probably

    Like

  51. 51
    Rhonda McMullin

    Bloggess trading cards! The world is now complete!

    Like

  52. You’re kidding me! Those cards are awesome!!

    By the way, I love the idea of leaving one somewhere for someone to find. Since I’m getting two new ones (I’m attending two book signings…) I may consider doing that. Or maybe I’ll give to someone I know. I don’t know. I have to think about it first.

    Like

    Carol recently posted Life is about the little things that make us happy, right?.

  53. My iPod on shuffle at a recent dinner party belting out your request for a Harry Potter lightning bolt scar on your v-jay-jay sandwiched between some Les Mis and some Barry Manilow? Priceless.

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  54. My iPod on shuffle at a recent dinner party belting out your request for a Harry Potter lightning bolt scar on your v-jay-jay sandwiched between some Les Mis and some Barry Manilow? Priceless.

    Like

  55. ‘urwelcome’

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  56. Winning would sorta start to make up for the fact that your book tour brought you nowhere near Dayton, OH. Sorta.

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  57. Fine. I’ll buy another copy. ….and give it away! Everyone wins!!! Yay!!

    Like

  58. Your book is terrific – and my friend likes it too:)

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    Andrea Mulder-Slater recently posted This can't be good for tourism.

  59. I’ve already bought your book 3 times in hardback. What’s one more in paperback for the extra chapter?:)

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  60. You’re on a trading card. That’s too awesome!

    Like

  61. I paid two dollars for the first edition of your book; okay, technically I checked it out from the library and just racked up a bunch of overdue fines, the profits of which I’m assuming you never saw, so I’ll have to make up for it by buying the paperback now. (My bookshelves have become hardback-intolerant.)

    Like

  62. I feel as if the Birdfeeders reference is some elaborate joke or play on words.. and I’m completely not in the know. I even Googled it, and all I got was a whole bunch of “keep squirrels out of your birdfeeders’ articles… Which got me thinking: Why do we choose to feed birds and not squirrels? Who came up with this idea? Are the squirrels not hungry in the winter as well? What did the squirrels ever do to us?

    (Ha! It’s a really obscure reference to a Sifl & Olly episode. ~ Jenny)

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  63. I need geek cards in my life! I NEED THEM! So please notify me as to whomever wins them (if it is not me), and I shall promptly go and steal them.. or you could ya know.. just give them to me and cut out the middle man? That’d be appreciated.:)

    Like

  64. It is really awesome that your book has been made available around the world. That’s quite an accomplishment. I’m probably going to buy the book… now. Or. One of these days. I’m going to buy it. Soon.

    Like

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  65. Okay. I bought it.

    (Couldn’t resist.)

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  66. I re-read your book anytime I need a laugh or reminder that no matter how crappy things are, they’re still funny as hell too. I’ve always been a misfit in my own mind, but never cared. Because I’m also a ROCKSTAR. Just like you, and just like everyone else.

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  67. Can you come to Canada?! Please! We need you here, we really do.

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  68. I need to buy the paperback, so I have a book I can let my sisters and family borrow. Hubby and I are still re-reading random chapters from the hardcover edition. It’s the kind of book you just don’t tire off😀
    If you send those cards all the way across the big pond, I hope to win one:) *crossing fingers like crazy*

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    Cara(Eli) recently posted Cousin Jesper.

  69. I gave the ebook as Christmas gifts, sharing the love one download at a time. =D

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  70. In here for the Geek-a-Week trading cards! Loved your book – recommend it to every book club that asks for recs. Because- we owe it to ourselves to read the book!

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  71. My husband is just going to LOVE that I’m buying this book for the…5th time, lol. Oh well, he’ll get over it just like the 3rd metal chicken I brought home…

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  72. A comment

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  73. I love the hard cover book, you signed it for me last year when you were in MA. thank you! My friends family and husband tell me I’m like you when I’m not taking my ADHD medication:) Can’t wait to read the new chapter!

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  74. The trading card is fabulous. I can’t love it more. Can’t wait to get the paperback version of the book, too!!

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    The Dose of Reality recently posted Don’t Grill a Steak, Grill Your Man on Valentine’s Day!.

  75. I work in a bookstore, and I love pointing people towards your book constantly.:)

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  76. This would categorized as, “Awesomesauce!” I hope I win!

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  77. The cards look awesome!

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  78. Hmmm.

    I’ll buy the paperback, but I’m annoyed with Anderson’s in Naperville (aka the “Chicago” signing).

    I already have the hardcover and don’t want another copy. It’s even signed! And they don’t have the paperback for sale yet, so I can’t get a ticket to the reading. Wtf.

    Apparently I can come and listen, but not say hi.

    I may be approaching you in the parking lot to have you sign my paperback copy (once I get it). You’ve met me twice already (big red dress at Chicago public library in July), so that won’t be totally awkward, right?

    (Find me in the parking lot. Not a problem. `Jenny)

    Like

  79. I LOVE the book, and actually may have to get the paperback just for the extra chapter (and because then I’ll have a copy that I’m willing to let friends borrow).

    I also got the Geek a Week cards – If I win a signed card, I’ll send you my unsigned card so you can send another one out!

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    Amanda recently posted Good #@(%ing Advice.

  80. I get all excited every time I go into my local book store in South Africa and see your books, I’m the weird chick trying to get a decent photo of them.

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    Trisha recently posted Silent Scream.

  81. Awesome! I bought the audio because I drive A Lot..and the I read the extra chapter from the hardcover at the book store …but I planning on buying the ebook so I can see all of the pics! Will it have the new chapter or should I just get the print version??

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  82. you know, i just lent out my hardcover, so i *could* tell the hubs i need the paperback….

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  83. What?! Not coming back to San Diego? Damn…and I even bought a new chicken.

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  84. If this is a repeat comment, I’m not really trying to stack the deck (HA, pun sort of intended) so that I win one of your trading cards but I wasn’t sure if my last comment posted and my computer is running really slow so it’s hard to see if I have a comment already so, to be on the safe side….

    I would really love your trading card! I bought your book on Nook but the pictures were really hard to see so I’m glad I have a reason to buy it twice! You’re awesome… hope to see you in Phoenix.

    Like

  85. I read parts of the book to my mom while she’s cooking….it’s how we “bond.” Except she ends up laughing so hard that flour ends up everywhere. The paperback will be perfect for her to read when she drinks her wine, but then I’m afraid the book will end up looking like the weapon used in blunt force trauma.

    Like

  86. I have hardcover version with your signature when you came to Portland Powells, kindle version, bought few for my parents and friends, and would love to have your softcover also. Pick me.. pick mee ….

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  87. 87
    RescueDawgMom

    Oh…..pick me! pick me!
    I’m buying the paperback version and can’t wait to read it all over again……mainly to quiet down the new voice in my head…..she’s pissed she wasn’t around when I read it the first time……..

    Like

  88. There’s no way I’d hide one of those trading cards in a closed book! I’d display it prominently in my office! :)

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  89. Was hoping you’d hit up an area close to home… No ATX or SA! I’m in SM, so I’d have tried to hit either one!

    Like

  90. My husband just asked me why it is that I have 3 copies of the book and the audio version and now need the paperback version. I told him because… he should go f’ himself. It’s so hard to keep these people in line.

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  91. OMG! Trading cards!?!?

    I saw you in Annapolis, MD (also loved your renaming of MD for Neil Patrick Harris, thank you) and you made my year!

    Like

  92. Adding any more tour dates? I’d gladly come hear you scream ‘i have DIARRHEA’ again.

    That’d never get old.

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  93. If my mom can’t find my hardback copy, she’s going to insist on buying me a new copy. I think I’m going to insist that she buy the paperback so I can have the extra chapter!! Then I can go to St. Louis and get you to sign it! Double win!! 😀

    Like

  94. No, silly. None of this would have happened without YOU. And, um, if we take a picture with our hardback, or we live in Canada (as some of us might be soon), will you send us a PDF of the last chapter? I don’t want to have to shop lift again!!:)

    Like

    Borg Blog recently posted What AM I waiting for?.

  95. I pre-ordered this from Amazon and can’t wait for it to arrive in the mail!

    Like

  96. I just bought my second copy of your book, and will be buying a third when the paperback comes out. Even if only for the extra chapter. Your hilarious honesty in both your book and your blog help me get through my tough times with a little smile. My grandmother is in ICU as we speak and this is one of the hardest weeks, but I am finding comfort in re-reading about Beyoncé.

    Thank you.

    Like

  97. Me! Me! Me! The book was awesome!

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  98. I am looking forward to when you come to Louisville.

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  99. 99
    Jackson Colville

    I much prefer paperback to hardback, easier to tote around and easier to read in any position!

    Like

  100. I’m pretty sure I NEED the trading cards. And I have my fingers crossed that you add more tour dates, particularly near me!

    Like

    Brandi recently posted The post I never wanted to write.

  101. Yay for paperback, hopefully you will make it out to Florida so that I can get both of my copies signed. (I bought it for myself for Mother’s Day last year and someone else bought it for me for my birthday.)

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  102. You know, I checked out your book from the library because I have a cheapskate living in my head saying “HOW DARE YOU SPEND MONEY ON THINGS!!!!!” (Hi, Mom!) and now I’m glad because I can buy this copy guilt free and with a free chapter on top:)

    Your book IS amazing, and I remember reading it in a hotel on vacation and being glad I was in another city because I alternated sobbing my eyes out and laughing with clearly psychotic glee.

    Like

  103. Loved your book! Going to try to get to your signing in NJ.

    You rock!

    Like

  104. I forced my library to buy it for me. The cards are groovy!

    Like

    Brook recently posted Just Keep Paddling!.

  105. 105
    Samantha (I smell like summer)

    Minnesota misses you, Jenny. ❤

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  106. i cant wait!!

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  107. I hope I’m the next lucky person that gets on the plane and find a copy of your paperback in my little seat pocket next to my barf bag.

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  108. 108
    Char Vanderweel

    I can’t wait to read this additional chapter.

    Like

  109. 109
    Nathan Blevins

    Wow, those trading cards are awesome! Please sign me up for the drawing! How many times can I repost this?

    Also, I see that I am going to have to buy the paperback as well, darn it! Will there ever be a hardback w/ the extra chapter?

    Like

  110. Everything about this makes me happy.

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  111. I’ll have to get the paperback from the library. I have the hardcover already, but I’d love to know about the secret chapter:) And a geek a week card? Peeeeeease!

    Like

  112. This is the highlight of my motivation for the day. I have expended all of my energy on you. Because you’re awesome!

    Like

  113. I bought your book but didn’t get an extra chapter. Gimme a card already.

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  114. The Bloggess card would make a great bookmark, or… I could add it to my Cards Against Humanity set! And perhaps the cards could figure out how to procreate and create little twisted, geeky, Bloggess/CAH offspring!

    Like

  115. Please come to Philadelphia!

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  116. You know, I checked out your book from the library because I have a cheapskate living in my head saying “HOW DARE YOU SPEND MONEY ON THINGS!!!!!” (Hi, Mom!) and now I’m glad because I can buy this copy guilt free and with a free chapter on top:)

    Your book IS amazing, and I remember reading it in a hotel on vacation and being glad I was in another city because I alternated sobbing my eyes out and laughing with clearly psychotic glee.

    Also one of the reviews on Amazon has the like “am I chuckling at someone who may legitimately be insane?” And the answer is, of course, sure. But then, I’m pretty sure most of us here can be legitimately considered insane 56% of the time and really, that’s all that matters.

    Like

  117. Omg…I can’t tell you how much I need those cards! So much so that I am leaving a comment before crawling back into my hermit hole!

    Like

  118. You’re welcome. And thank YOU. I’m hoping that if I hang out at enough of your book signings/readings, you’ll come have coffee or go for a nice walk with me. A girl can dream.

    Like

    MILF Runner recently posted Is oatmeal supposed to be stringy like this?.

  119. 119
    Sandra (a.k.a. Sandrandan)

    Oh yes! I would definitely love to own the cards. I could put them with my Van Helsing chick button and my Jean Louis the alligator pirate cutout.

    Like

  120. I must have those cards! And I already have my tickets for your KC visit!

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  121. Is the extra chapter the same bonus chapter from the audio book?

    (Nope. It’s a totally different one. ~ Jenny)

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  122. I helped crowd fund these Geek a Week cards because you were going to be on one of them. I’d love to have a signed one!

    Like

  123. I live in Canada. It’s cold here and there’s nothing to do but read. And make fun of celebrities, but that’s a pretty negative thing to do. Help me be more positive and send me some geeky trading cards, k? That would basically make you the Texan Dalai Lama. We both win.

    Like

  124. Once I move to a place that actually has a bookstore, I will most definitely buy it. I guess I could just take a road trip and get it, but I really need a reason to move anyway.:)

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    Amanda recently posted demons of the past.

  125. A friend let me borrow her (autographed) hard copy of your book and I loved it! I will definitely be getting the paperback version for myself! Would love one of the cards!:)

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  126. I love you! The cards are great! The book is great! You’re blog is awesome! I love exclamation points!

    Like

  127. I would totally LOVE to own one of the cards. And will most likely buy the paperback just to read the extra chapter eventhough I have the hardcover!

    Like

  128. So, is this a real chapter, or one of those like one paragraph chapters that isn’t really a chapter, but just a pretend chapter?😉 Honestly, I loved the first edition so much, that I wouldn’t mind buying another copy, even if it’s just an extra sentence. Anything that supports me getting more enjoyment is totally worth it.:)

    I do have a real question… is the paperback edition with the extra chapter available as an ebook? I prefer reading on my Nook… so I’m just wondering if I need to get an actual physical copy or not. Of course, if I don’t have a hard copy, then I guess I wouldn’t need the bookmark… which I would like to have… hmmm.. problem solved!

    Thanks Jenny, for using your amazing problem solving skills to clear that up for me!

    Like

  129. Neat! I can’t wait to find a copy on a plane so I can read it.

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  130. I might just have to buy the paperback since I loaned my Hardcopy with the signed bookplate to my sister. AND I haven’t seen it in forever! I’ve been wanting to reread it again anyways… along with the 4 other books of mine she has.

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  131. can you put the new chapter online, so that we hardback owners can read it….if not i will have to turn into a shoplifter

    Like

    alan recently posted BUY MY BIRDFEEDERS.

  132. so I totally already have the hardcover and the audio book and now I totally need to go get the paperback! please let there be the extra chapter in canada😄 It’s the best pick-me-up book ever, you can’t help but laugh and feel like you aren’t alone in your weirdness❤

    Like

  133. Any chance of an update to the eBook?

    ~EdT.

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  134. Will the Kindle Version be automatically updated to include the new chapter?

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  135. I’m pretty sure it’s fate that your stop in Kansas City is during my spring break…SO EXCITED!

    Like

  136. I totally bought the hardcover and IMMEDIATELY gave it to my BFF when she moved bc i knew she needed it and i loved it so much i would have no problem buying it again. The whole extra chapter in the paperback tells me it was the smart move! Can’t wait!

    Like

  137. The thing that sucks about this http://thebloggess.com/2013/02/tour-2/ is that none of them say Texas. We’re not all crazy. I SWEAR.:)

    Like

    Tracy recently posted The One Where I Married My Mother and Also. Upchuck..

  138. Just got my tix to KC stop of the tour…..cant wait…one of the very few books that make me laugh out loud !!!!

    Like

  139. The thing that sucks about the tour is that none of them say Texas. We’re not all crazy. Promise. I mean we are, but we’re all not THAT kind of crazy.

    Like

    Tracy recently posted The One Where I Married My Mother and Also. Upchuck..

  140. 140
    Michelle Bakota

    I’d totally buy your book again for the extra chapter!

    Like

  141. DAMMMIT! I bought the hardcover and didn’t get no extra chapter! I think in lieu of the extra chapter I should get a sweet ass geek card! (That almost said sweet ass feel card due to my asshole phone).

    Like

  142. I need these. For real.

    Like

  143. I actually just lent my hardcover copy of your book to my son’s MT (Mobile Therapist) last week after he was having an exceptionally hard session. She had never heard of you before, which I thought was just the worst thing EVER and I had to immediately fix. She has the same awesome sense of humor as I do, so I knew that she’d love you. 😉 I can’t wait to find out what she thought of the book.

    Now I might have to buy a bunch of the paperback copies to give out as gifts… Maybe I can knit little tiny mice to give out with them?!

    Like

  144. 144
    Kelly Bradshaw

    Jenny Lawson, you are my hero! I can’t wait to meet you!

    Like

  145. Woo hoo! So exciting:)

    Like

    Tiffany recently posted A letter to NY Times re: Lolo Jones article.

  146. Loved the book and waiting for your next!

    Like

  147. So happy to see you’re coming back to the Phoenix area. I might have to buy a paperback just to get priority seating this time (as opposed to waiting 4 hours to get my book signed like last time) I’m sure my daughter would love a chance to get another picture with you.

    ooh! and… Pick Me! Pick Me!

    Like

    Melodie recently posted Sometimes Family Sucks.

  148. Can’t wait to meet you in St Louis. Your, the book (I will keep this and give my other copies away ) and DRINKS. What a great Friday night

    Like

  149. Can’t wait to meet you in St Louis. You, the book (I will keep this and give my other copies away ) and DRINKS. What a great Friday night

    Like

  150. I would love one! Also for you to tour Texas. And don’y worry there are plenty of people who will just have to know what’s in the extra chapter like me. So I will end up with two copies of your book.

    Like

  151. I need a bookmark. I have to use my husband’s hand to keep my place for now and he’s gonna want that back soon.

    Like

  152. Bought the hard cover for a flight to California from Boston. Sat next to a sweet older lady who was super chatty… until I pulled out the book and she saw what was on the front cover. Conveniently, she was sitting on my left, so for the entire flight, she got to admire Hamlet von Schnitzel in all his glory. She didn’t say a word to me for the rest of the flight.

    She clearly thought I was crazy. She doesn’t know what she’s missing.

    Like

  153. Those geek cards are adorable and awesome – I would love them!

    Like

  154. Dear Jenny’s publisher,

    Please make the bonus chapter available for purchase separately for Kindle and whatnot. My husband already thinks I’m crazy because I bought the hardcover, Kindle, and audio editions … he might leave me if I told him I was buying the paperback. I would absolutely pay .99, 1.99, 2.99, even 3.99 for a digital copy of the bonus chapter that I could hide on my Kindle:)

    Like

  155. Omg, those trading cards are fabulous!!!

    Like

  156. I’ve already given two copies of your book to friends; I’m happy to keep spreading the joy!:)

    Like

  157. I swear your blog hates me now. Everytime I comment it messes up. Anyways, i will most definitely be buying your paperback and rereading it😉

    Like

    keaven neely recently posted Valley.

  158. Because the hardback was awesome and a paper back with an extra chapter is sweet action! Now, I would love some signed trading cards” oh! And a pony.

    Like

  159. I’m kinda wondering if the new chapter is going to show up in the eBook versions as well – that’s how I bought it when the hardback came out.

    Any plans for an updated eBook?:)

    Like

  160. 160
    Pamela Grieve

    The book was hilarious! Canada is not that far away eh?

    Like

  161. Bookmark?! That would be placed right next to my tiny Buddha statue. Because you two remind me so much of each other. Or, yah, possibly a bookmark.

    Like

  162. Excited to buy and send this to my mom, who also battles depression. She’s in need of some good laughs:) Thanks for your hilarious stories and for helping those of us without depression understand it a bit more.

    Like

  163. Fabulous! I love the trading cards — so very clever! Can’t wait for your stop in Dayton, and I’m hoping to make it, but I don’t deal well with crowds so I might not . . .

    Like

  164. A NEW CHAPTER!? Good thing I am traveling to the USA in a few months so I can pick it up. But I plan to rip out the new chapter and keep it for myself. My fucked up friend can buy her OWN new chapter. xoxoxo

    Like

    tabitha W recently posted Financial Pants.

  165. 165
    Chelsea Brimer

    SOOOOOO excited to see you in KC! Already have tickets!

    Like

  166. Geek trading cards… look more interesting that all those sports trading cards I see.:)

    Like

  167. I love your book. Whenever I’m feeling down, I read it for a laugh. I’ve recommended it to everyone I know, or have met, or have walked past. I should just carry around a sandwich board sign at this point.

    Like

  168. Trying to gear myself up to come to your signing. Left Bank can get really crowded.

    Like

  169. yay! I might just buy a copy of it even though I have the e-book.. you never know who would benefit from a book loan

    Like

    Erica B recently posted Stealth trip to the stomping grounds.

  170. Love the trading cards, and can’t wait to see you in Paramus in March!

    Like

  171. 171
    Lenee' Pulver

    Must.have.trading.card… Buying paperback to match my signed hardback!

    Like

  172. You can never have too many bookmarks!

    Will there be a second second tour that brings you back to LA?

    Like

  173. More laughter from the extra chapter… YAY!!

    Like

  174. The cards look awesome!

    I totally bought the book in hardcover, read it and then while I was re-reading it visited a friend that I decided needed to read it, so I gave her my copy and went and bought another one so I could finish re-reading it, but the paperback has a new chapter…. I might have to buy a third copy.:)

    Like

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  175. Your remember that part in your book where you talk about teachers assigning it for reading? Yeah, that’s me. I’m trying to get my administration to buy a classroom set….

    Like

  176. I love reading your blog and your book. I suffer from depression and severe anxiety too, and when I read your blog it shows me that it is possible to get through. Thank you for being such a wonderful role model. I am still on the look out for a giant metal chicken with which to traumatize my bf:)

    Like

  177. Thank you for writing such an amazing book that has me laughing so hard I’m in tears! I’d love to have an autographed card to go with my book (as soon as I get it back from the coworker I lent it to – I can’t stop sharing it with people!)

    Like

  178. So that may mean I end up buying 30 or 40 copies. Can I get a volume discount?

    Like

  179. I bought it for my dad for Christmas. Apparently, he spent the next week following my mom around the house reading passages to her.

    Like

    Czaja! recently posted My Boss, Cigarettes, Truck Norris, and Shakespeare.

  180. OK. I am a sailor– really. All good sailboats have TONS of book shelves. While mine is a work in progress (check out my blog: http://www.svoctopussy.com), I would love to have some geek-a-week trading cards to use as bookmarks in all of my books. Including yours.

    And just think of the entertainment value… I mean, on a sailboat we don’t get cable (although we do get Netflix — and with it, access to the first several seasons of Dr. Who!)

    And, anyone who can make references to Sylvia Plath in a post about taxidermied shit rocks!

    Send me some of your cards! Don’t make me beg (although I am not above that).

    Cheers,
    Octopussy
    S/V Octopussy

    Like

    Octopussy recently posted Carpe Diem.

  181. I have your book on my Kindle. Most things I archive after I read them but I keep your book at the top for when I need a pick me up or a giggle:) I plan on buying several copies of the paper back for gifts😛

    Like

  182. 182
    Doug Richardson

    Missed you the last time you were in NYC. I won’t screw up this time. Knock ’em dead.

    Like

  183. 183
    sara jillette mclaughlin

    I want I want!
    Also I bought the digital copy (and four hard copies you signed for me for my family, thanks!) and registered to get a signed nameplate, but all I got was an empty envelope from The Penguin Group. Took me forever to figure out what that was about, then I remembered who they were.

    Like

  184. My mom and sister have read your book because of me influencing them. :] I wish you were coming back to Colorado, so I could go see you again (I saw you when you were in Denver in August. It was the day I broke my foot. I will remember it for two reasons).

    Like

    Robyn Webb recently posted In Case You Were Wondering, My Foot is Still Being a Jerk.

  185. I MUST own both the hardback and the paperback!! Now that I think about it I also need it on my kindle. Hmmmm… I may need to get a job to pay for all of them!

    Like

  186. I will miss being at the kansas city signing by 12 hours. American airlines refused to delay my flight for you. Said you were not famous like Beoncye…i so disagree

    Like

  187. 187
    vicki trattar

    I will buy the paperback for an extra chapter. Hell yeah!

    Like

  188. Want trading cards.

    Like

  189. 189
    Sara Cooksey

    I will need to buy the paperback for the extra chapter. I am sure it will be worth it, especially because I have the electronic version, which cannot be lended, but will be able to lend the paperback! I so hope the new chapter includes taxidermy.

    Like

  190. 190
    Luna lovegood

    I love the hardback and actually left it sitting on a bench in hopes that someone will get to enjoy it as I’m buying the paper back (I want the new chapter all to myself). Xoxoxo luna

    Like

  191. Looks like it’s time to update my Amazon wish list.

    Like

  192. Definitely gotta to buy the paperback, too! Thanks again for being so amazing Jenny.

    Like

  193. You signed my kindle! I have the hardcover and will be buying the paperback! Go Jenny!

    Like

    Jessabella recently posted Something Better Be Burning Down.

  194. Omg you’re coming to Louisville! Yay! Yay! Ok i’m done now. I’m easily excited these days!

    Like

    Stephanie H recently posted One year later....

  195. Hope I win….

    Like

  196. Well, you know how to get my inner geek all excited, now…

    Like

    Claire J recently posted Rejections & Restlessness.

  197. Is the extra chapter the same as the extra chapter in the audiobook? I bought the hardback and the audiobook… just curious!

    Wish you were coming to central Virginia on your tour. I would love to meet you.

    I love the Geek-a-Week cards. What a neat idea to give them as a prize!!!

    (Nope. It’s a brand new one.:) ~ Jenny)

    Like

    Jennifer Taylor recently posted Geek and Sundry Tabletop Contest!.

  198. I’m so happy you’re coming back to Arizona!!! Plus the cards are totally rad!

    Like

  199. Pick me! Pick me!!

    Like

  200. My baseball team all got our own (very nerdy) trading cards when I was 10. I’ll trade you cards.

    Like

  201. I WANT!!!!! And I wish I could see you on tour!

    Like

  202. I second the forgiveness for no-Philly sentiment.

    Like

  203. I have to read the last new chapter so of course I will buy the book. And I would LOVE to have your play cards as bookmarks. Love you Jenny.

    Like

  204. Looking forward to your visit to Ancient Rome!!

    Like

  205. I’m new to your blog! I heard you were kind of awesome. I think I heard right:)
    P.S. I so want to read this book!

    Like

    Priya recently posted Dreams Versus Reality.

  206. Wow, trading cards. I can only dream of being the subject of my own set of trading cards.

    Like

    Steph@livingbrilliant recently posted Feel the love.

  207. I would like to win. Please.
    I also want to absorb this extra chapter without having to actually read it. Reading is hard.
    Someone make that happen.

    Like

    Melissa recently posted Mood swings and naked babies.

  208. Eee! I’m waiting to buy it until your book signing though!

    Like

    Jordan recently posted SOTD - 01.24.13.

  209. I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU TO BE ON TOUR!

    Like

  210. Jenny,

    I listen to my books vs reading them. Are they going to release the extra chapter in Audio? Loved hearing your voice each day on my commute (1 hour one way….) You just made that hour seem to fly by….. Or maybe it was because I do drive a little beyond the posted speed limit….. just a little.

    Like

  211. I actually work with someone whose father has pet turkeys – none of them are named Jenkins – but her story reminded me of your book. Those turkeys must have been more well-behaved than your Dad’s because she actually picks hers up and hugs them. Anyway – it would be cool to win! Our book club read your book this past month and we all love it!!!

    Like

  212. i don’t have any fucked up friends. i’m the most fucked up of all. can you email me the extra chapter?

    Like

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  213. 213
    Brandy Schmidt

    CARDS!

    Like

  214. Congratulations on your success with the book. It’s great and it’s nice to see someone deserving getting the attention and praise. Love to read your blog… always makes me laugh (usually out loud at the most inappropriate times, which are the best times). :)

    Like

  215. No visits to Oklahoma, eh? Texans. Jeez. I promise you we’re all fucked up and anxiety ridden here too.

    I’d adore the trading cards. I ‘m a daily checker-inner with you and Jen @ Cakewrecks.

    -MamaRama

    Like

    MamaRama recently posted Dear Rama: Examples of the Wisdom of Rama.

  216. So want a trading card!! And will see you in April in San Jose!! SO. EXCITED. (and so is Fred, our rainbow-coloured caterpillar who you met in SF last year. i think it was the highlight of his year.)

    Like

  217. How many chapters does the Kindle edition have?

    Like

    Tragic Sandwich recently posted Baby’s First Pillow Fort.

  218. I already have the hard copy but I know several people who need your book in their life. I’m thinking awesome Easter gift since it’ll miss valentines day. The trading card does make the perfect bookmark.

    Like

  219. Another chapter AND Geek a Week trading cards? I just went to heaven!

    Like

    Queen Of All Things Good recently posted Now There's WHAT In My Yard?!.

  220. Ha! I’ll buy the paperback just for the new chapter and then give the Hardback to random people. Basically the same thing I’m already doing right now anyway.:)
    But: I think you should definitely send me one of the trading cards. Not for me. For my shrink. Who’s awesome! She ordered Beyonce in the Spring of LAST YEAR and still hasn’t gotten her/it. So I think she deserves a card. If I knew her address you could send it to her directly. She’d be thrilled. It’s a poor substitute for Beyonce but since I doubt you’d sign and ship her… a card might do.
    Think about it! I heard her recommend your book to another patient recently. She’s totally your anonymous PR person! And she needs some fairy dust! She was jealous of mine😉
    Greetings from the South!

    Like

  221. I’ll buy a copy for my sister – she’ll enjoy it.:-)

    Like

    John Lewis recently posted My Acting Résumé.

  222. Ooh ooh ooh! Trading Cards! Can’t wait to see you in Phoenix again! And this trip should be haboob free for you.😉

    Like

  223. Funniest book I’ve ever read. Super excited for the paperback version.

    Like

  224. If only they made trading cards for dorks, I would have a shot.

    Like

  225. 225
    Carl Strauser

    Jenny, I just re-read your book for the third time. I laugh just as hard and just as often as I did the first time. Thank you for the laughs!

    Like

  226. Come to Philly, darling. The City of Brotherly Love wants you!

    Like

  227. I’ll have to buy it to read the bonus chapter. I wish I could see you on tour! I’ve made my husband read your book in hopes of him understanding my anxiety more. He loves you now too!

    Like

  228. If the new chapter is included in the UK version I’m going to go to Waterstones and read the new chapter. I can’t afford to buy it all over again, sorry.

    Like

  229. Ordering the paperback – had two copies of the hardback so gave one to my sister – REALLY want to get the audio book just to hear you read it!
    Geek-a-Week? – sure put me in the hat.

    Like

  230. Thanks for including me in your giveaway, Jenny!

    For those of you who are new to Geek A Week, the cards are unfortunately no longer in stock at ThinkGeek, but I do have a VERY LIMITED number available at my online store. PS: The Bloggess is in Season 4. https://peraltartsy.myshopify.com/collections/geek-a-week
    :)

    Like

  231. I have your book. Can’t wait to read it!! Hoping maybe one day you’ll pass through Tuscaloosa, AL for a book tour stop, too!

    Like

  232. Congratulations on the success of your book. I pre-ordered the paperback just to read the new chapter. My husband is going to wonder why I need to order the same book twice, but hey…at least it’s not towels!

    Like

  233. I am out of bookmarks.

    Like

  234. 234
    Christine Menton

    Love you, love the book, and I cannot tell you how often we refer back to Beyonce … the chicken of course not the singer…. Thanks for being you Jenny! Oh and I would seriously love if picked me for a book mark of awesomeness card. :)

    Like

  235. So, does the e-reader version have the extra chapter? I haven’t read it yet but it’s on my iPad, ready to go.

    Would love the trading cards.

    Like

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  236. Oh my goodness – is that a Sonic Hairdryer? And don’t thank us. None of this would have happened without you.

    Like

    daniel recently posted Comment on Off The Lawn by Daniel monk Pelfrey.

  237. I read your book and could not believe how much we have in common (both Czech, from Texas, have crazy fathers who scarred our psyches with dead animals, hilarious sisters who share our adolescent scars, severe anxiety disorder, the list could go on.) I think winning an autographed card would be really cool. But it would have to say “Jak se mas” on it.:)

    Like

  238. I would LOVE one of them. So looking forward to buying a copy in paperback, I just couldn’t afford the hard cover… But my library ordered it in on my request😀

    Like

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  239. The trading cards are awesome! And of course, so was the book:)

    Like

    BeccaV recently posted Big girl!.

  240. Your book sits on the bookshelves with all of the other literary classics. You have encouraged our family to talk about things we wouldn’t have, before reading your book! Keep calm in this crazy world and carry on! Very cool cards, we need bookmarks – please send!

    Like

  241. It’s great when you can write a brilliant love letter to the crazy life you’ve led so far, inspire others, please editors, manager, agents and other corporate ilk AND make millions, right?
    Everyone wins, indeed.
    Great job, Jenny.

    Like

  242. I recommend this to my “crazy” friends as a reward and incentive. Best book ever.

    Like

  243. Oy vey I already bought the hardback twice AND the audiobook! I will probably need the paperback, too!

    Like

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  244. I’d love to get the paperback and read the new chapter, but I may not be able to afford it. Maybe I’ll buy it, read the new chapter, and donate it to the library. Justification is a beautiful thing : )

    Like

  245. Love those cards!

    Can’t wait to see you in San Jose! I bought the eBook so there’s not really anything to sign. I can bring you some wine though, or tequila – it’s your choice, really.

    Jen

    Like

  246. None in the Austin area (yet)? Guess I’ll just have to settle for a 1-in-200-something-chance at a trading card.

    Like

    Kelley Metzger recently posted Pin it and Do it! February Edition.

  247. Love this!! Love you!! Love the trading cards!!

    Like

  248. Please add Boston, MA to your book tour =) Also, I love your writing. It makes me laugh out loud and love that not everyone feels the need to pretend to be perfect, or cover up their real feelings.

    Like

  249. Wait.., what? We don’t get the extra chapter in the UK?! I shall be returning my shoplifted copy for a full refund, then…

    Like

  250. I would LOVE a trading card. And I can’t wait to see you in Dayton. I can point you toward the best bathrooms and therapists around the bookstore if necessary! Hugs from a fellow anxiety sufferer!:)

    Like

  251. Please update once you know about Canada! If I have to, I’ll “borrow” an American friend’s address, but I’d rather not wait if I can just pre-order it here.:)

    Like

  252. I’ll be buying the paperback! My hard cover sits in it’s special place on the shelf so that your signature doesn’t get tainted by my husband or kids so the paperback will give me opportunity to dog ear the pages like I want to (since my reading copy of the hardback, which I stole from my best friend, was absconded with by my sister, who is now a fan) Stay awesome!!!!

    Like

  253. I totally want a geek-a-week card! And now I have to buy the paperback for the chapter. Luckily I know someone who I want to read the book after:P

    Like

  254. Paperback, awesome! I hope the extra chapter and you make it to Canada sometime soon, eh!

    Like

  255. You signed my baby (and a book), but I feel a strong need for that card. Also, you should come to Connecticut–or Rhode Island, I’d travel–and sign the infant again.

    Like

  256. excellent! i am too cheap for hardback.

    Like

  257. Geek-A-Week rocks. You rock. Len Peralta rocks. Mavis Staples rocks. OK, I just threw in Mavis Staples as a non sequitur, and just to let you know that when I say “rocks”, I mean genuine rock-i-tude (on a level similar to Mavis Staples), and not some silly meaningless platitude I say to a lot of people. Although, I do say it to a lot of people.

    Be well and rock on.

    Like

  258. Is the extra chapter the same as the one on the audio book? Because that was awesome!

    Like

  259. I missed your signing in Boston and the closest one this round is NYC. It unfortunately doesn’t work for me, but if it did I would make sure that you had something interesting and awkward to talk about for laters. Not like you don’t have plenty, but still. For funs!

    Like

    Seanna Lea recently posted A big wide hello!.

  260. Ooh ooh! Want. Trading. Cards. So. Excited.

    Like

  261. Oh.. I’d love a card! I’ve practically made a career out of never winning anything.. Here’s to hoping.:)

    Like

  262. My sister is raving about your book. She just gave it to my mom, and I plan on reading it too. Might have to buy the paperback book since I’m into travelling and will need light (literally) copies of books to amuse me!

    Like

    Cat recently posted Australia & New Zealand.

  263. It’s already pre-ordered at Amazon, so pick me pick me pick me!!!!!!!!😉

    Like

  264. I love your trading card! Winning one would be awesome.

    Like

  265. Well i am so buying a few copies of this then.One for me and two for random friends who will so love it.I already have the hardback but paperback with an extra is to much to say no too! ;0)

    Like

  266. I am so going to have to buy the paperback as a gift for someone, just so I can read the extra chapter. Fortunately, I know several people who desperately need a copy.

    Like

  267. Right off the bat, I see three of my fave geeks in that pic. Fingers crossed.

    And I may have to buy another copy just to give it to my BFF…

    Like

  268. It is such a great book, I recommend it to everyone I know. And if they don’t buy they may get it as a Birthday, Christmas, Anniversary, Valentine, St. Patrick’s Day, ect. Gifts.

    Like

  269. I love waking up to your blogs!!! And I would love a card!!!!❤

    Like

  270. Very excited for the paperback version:)

    Like

  271. I splurged and bought the hardcover, but now that it’s coming out in paperback my bookclub is going to read it. They’ve been wanting to read it since it came out, but you know those book club rules: only paperbacks.

    Like

  272. I really think you need to start renting out Beyonce…I would love to have a giant metal chicken on my porch to greet my husband one day! Oh and I’d like to win something…maybe a pony:)

    Like

  273. I’m still not terribly happy that your “Kansas” stop isn’t really Kansas. Not that there’s much to do in the rest of Kansas.

    Like

    Bree recently posted Starting to Run.

  274. MMMMMMMMM .. extra chapter. I can almost taste the zombie taxidermic goodness.

    Like

  275. The book’s first on my list of post-most-useless-classes-ever reads. It should cheer me up immensely, as long as the phrase “ontological dignity” isn’t used. Then I may cry.

    Like

  276. I have your book on hold at the library, I can’t wait to read it!

    Tayet, age 14

    Like

    Tayet recently posted My Camera(s).

  277. OK, evidently my shameless pandering, promise to buy thirty (30!0 copies of the book, the fact that at least 3 of my co-workers have bought your book because of me, and the fact that one of my students is winning prose reading competitions all over Texas aren’t enough to persuade you to do a book signing in Austin, where I will but at least 3 more copies of the paperback (or maybe one hardback and two paperbacks, my mom deserves a hardback, but then she won’t get the extra chapter and I’m all conflicted).

    Just say it:
    * I, Jenny Lawson, The Bloggess do hereby confirm….oh what the hell, I am doing a book signing in Austin. There! I said it. Must go lie down now. Thanks.*

    *Shamelessly cut, pasted and deviously modified from a certain email….

    Like

  278. Love you, Jenny! Come to Atlanta sometime!

    Like

  279. No, thank YOU. Seriously

    Like

  280. 280
    Lisa Partridge

    Could you please give us (or sell us) Canadians a copy of the new chapter. Maybe as an e-book. Assuming we don’t get it in the paperback version that is. I bought one of my best friends your book as her Christmas present. Love you lots.

    Like

  281. I would like to throw in my hat for these trading cards. :3

    Also, I heard somewhere that if one wants to see you on your tour, one must buy tickets. Is this true?

    Like

  282. 282
    Angela Wicentowich

    I would love to use you as a bookmark! I would also love it if you could come to Vancouver, BC! Congrats on all your success and thank you for letting us weirdos feel good about letting it all hang out.

    Like

  283. These would be fun to have! Also, I already have a ticket to see you in Kansas City on your book tour, so there’s that.

    Like

    Average Jane recently posted Average Jane Is No Nancy Drew.

  284. I am currently scheming to attend the Louisville reading since 2 hours is not too far to drive to bask in your awesomeness. I mean Indy is just up the road, and it’s a bigger market and we totally love you here and you could have just as easily come here but it’s not like I’m bitter or anything 😉

    Oh, I would like a Geek card!

    Like

  285. I mean I would really love to be ON a geek card, but having your card is the next best thing!

    Like

  286. Will there be an ebook? And I really think you should visit Franklin, TN. That would be a wonderful excuse for a date night for my husband and me.

    Like

  287. Awww…I wish I was living in the US now just to avail of your paperback!

    Like

  288. Let me just first say, I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy you’re finally coming to San Jose! It’s in my calendar, and I’m counting down the days. But now I have to decide, do I just take the hardback to have you sign (which already has the signed nameplate), or buy the paperback, which has the bonus of an extra chapter, but not the durability of a hardback. Decisions, decisions…

    Like

  289. 289
    Trish Howard

    Loved the book! *fingers crossed* The cards look really cool. You should create an APS superhero one:)

    Like

  290. You best give those to me. I finally moved your book into my cart and the price had gone up! And it doesn’t even have the extra chapter! I cried for days.

    Like

  291. I am so excited to read the extra chapter to your book! I would love to visit you on tour, but you don’t have any TX dates. Sadness😦

    Like

  292. 292
    Adam Lipscomb

    Ooooh! Me! Meeeeeeee! *waves hand wildly in the air*

    Like

  293. I discovered you a few months back and read your book about a month ago. It was wonderful to find someone who I could relate to on so many levels. I read your posts to my husband and his comment is normally, that sounds like something you would do. Thank you for being so open and honest for the rest of us don’t always feel so alone.

    Like

  294. 294
    Veronica Thomas

    I will need to get the paperback for the extra chapter:) BF didn’t understand why I was both laughing hysterically and crying while reading your book – would love to get a Geek a Week bookmark.

    Thanks Jenny!

    Like

  295. I may have to buy a paper back copy of your book because I keep lending it the hard copy and now I don’t know where it is. So I hope the extra chapter is in the Canadian version as well! AND Geek A Week Trading Cards??! WANT!

    Like

  296. Can I just say thank you so much for writing this book. I have the hardcover and give it to everyone to read. You have made me laugh to tears. And there are too many things I see that remind me of you or I think are effed up enough that you’ll like. Keep more coming!!!

    Like

  297. I wish I could borrow the book from someone but, I’m the only person around me who reads this blog religiously. I’m in the process of trying to change that…

    Like

    Devon S recently posted It's the little things.

  298. I’m newly unemployed, so I can’t afford to get another copy at the moment.:-/ I have the e-book, but eventually want to get a hard copy. I love your book so much. My boyfriend and I quote it to each other all the time. Having the Geek-A-Week card as a bookmark for my eventual hardcopy, would be icing on the cake.:)

    Like

  299. I. Need. These. Otherwise, my anxiety will keep me up all night trying to guess who else is in the pack of cards and trying to figure out if I know all of them and wondering if that makes me sufficiently geeky while simultaneously telling me that it’s ridiculous for me to be so anxious about something that has nothing to do with anything but doesn’t it really?

    Like

  300. Can’t wait until you come to Cincinnati! My sister and I are stoked! I would love a trading card, because then it could mingle with my Doctor Who Trading cards, which I just happened upon in a book store like a month ago… I was EXTREMELY excited!

    Like

    MichelleG recently posted Mistakes were made, good quote.

  301. Love the book! Have read it over and over again… causing my unsuspecting co-workers to wonder out loud what the hell i’m giggling at!

    Like

  302. I will see you in Chicago!

    Like

  303. No Pittsburgh on your tour? The 4th most literate city in the US?😦

    Like

  304. Will my kindle update? I will totally re-buy if needed, but just wanted to check! Thanks for being you and making me laugh all the freaking time!! I would love a geek card that I could proudly display!

    Like

  305. Thank you for this amazing book!

    Like

  306. Ooh! Will the extra special chapter be in the kindle edition?
    Love your blog… do you get tired of hearing that? I’ll be sitting at my desk reading it and a guffaw will suddenly explode from me. But it’s okay… they already think I’m nuts here.

    Like

  307. Awesome bookmarks, and LIFE changing book !!!

    Like

  308. LOVELOVELOVE the book. Giggled myself silly over “CHALUPA!”
    Loaned it to my fiance. He finished (and loved) it and have now loaned it to my sister. I may have to buy the paperback so that I have a copy!
    Would love some Bloggess cards, but that’s not the important part. The important part is that you are wonderful and your book should be read by everyone! :)

    Like

  309. Have been waiting for the paperback forever:)

    Leaving a comment to enter because who wouldn’t want to be able to say ‘You need a favour? I’ve got the Bloggess in my pocket’, seriously!

    Like

  310. I can’t wait! I’m driving from Iowa to KC, MO to see you!:)

    Like

  311. Wish you’d come to Jacksonville FL, we are totally messed up here!

    Like

    StephD recently posted Boundaries People! Boundaries!.

  312. Paperback is pretty great, but I have the Kindle version so I can laugh like a maniac wherever I choose! Your book is beyond amazing!

    Like

    Nickie recently posted Blogger Tag Game.

  313. I’m in Tasmania (yes it exists as do Tasmanian Devils). I couldn’t find your book at the book store but I asked for it at the library and it was there already AND there was a wait! You are worldwide!

    Like

    Y recently posted How to tell it’s February in NJ.

  314. Wish you were coming out to the Pacific Northwest for your book tour! Congrats for coming out in paperback!

    Like

  315. I adore your book. My best friend and I are planning on making your Chicago book signing (even though I live in Michigan.)
    Also, I recently got laid off before I could buy my best friend a nice Christmas present …so your trading cards would be a PRETTY AWESOME gift for her. Just sayin.

    Like

    Amanda Marcotte recently posted Being good at something vs. being fulfilled by it.

  316. I’m buying the paperback for my 15 year old daughter so she can share it with all of her friends and learn of the dangers of teen putting your arm up a cow’s vagina. You’re like an After School Special. So yes please on the trading card, though I’m not sure whether it’s for me or her. Does my answer affect my ability to get a card? Because that, whatever it is.

    Can’t wait to meet you in NYC!

    Like

    Maya recently posted Once More, With Feeling.

  317. Any UK release date for the paperback/ extra chapter?

    True story: When I read your book, my mother was watching a very serious news show and I ended up having to leave the room because I was giggling so much!

    Like

  318. 319
    BooksInGarden

    Love the bookmarks! If I win (uproarious laughing, followed by wheezing and coughing – I but rarely win), I will give the bookmark to my daughter who introduced me to TheBloggess and whom I gifted with the hardback. Thank you for all that you share.

    Like

  319. Hoping to get out to see you when you’re in Chi-town.

    Like

  320. i’m hoping to make the chicago (aka naperville) stop on the jenny lawson train. and i would love geek-a-day cards, who wouldn’t?

    Like

  321. I’m gonna drive my pregnant ass an hour and a half to see you! By the way, I hope its okay with you if I have a baby in the library.

    Like

  322. Those are awesome!

    Like

    Cassie recently posted I'm still alive.

  323. Your book makes me frapjous. You’re the bee’s stinger.

    Like

    Maggie recently posted clash of the brightens (pink and red).

  324. I like to win! Am also looking forward to your paperback release as my sister bought it in hard back and moved to London with it before I was able to borrow it from her!

    Like

  325. 326
    amy from germany

    YAY! Geek a week! YAY! Paperback! YAY! Extra chapter!😀

    Like

  326. 327
    blindinsanity

    Eeek! So excited for you!

    Like

  327. I ever win anything and I don’t expect to for whining about but I wanted to comment… mostly I think you are awesome and I try to tell everyone I know about you…

    Like

    Annette recently posted Does anyone really know how to be single???.

  328. I absolutely LOVED your book! If you come back through Seattle I may have to buy the paperback just so I can have 2 signed copies. Though I may buy the paperback anyway. For the bonus chapter.

    Like

  329. I have an amazon gift card I’ve been holding on to since Christmas JUST for this. Yay!!!

    Like

  330. Like I could resist buying the paperback version. And extra chapter PLUS super portable. YAY.

    So excited for you, and all the people you’re going to meet on your paperback tour.

    Like

  331. Do Geek-A-Week cards make my day? Yes, they do! Totally awesome.

    Like

  332. How geeky am I? My first thought: “Whoa, you have a Peter Sagal card?!!!”

    Like

  333. I’d love cards, and more importantly I am looking forward to seeing you read in San Jose!

    Like

  334. *calls calls calls, calls from the public, calls calls calls, calls (thunk)*
    I have to admit, I own a copy of all of the Sifl and Olly shows.

    Like

  335. Ooo, me! I’ve bought two hardcover, the audiobook… *might* resist the paperback, we’ll see…

    Like

  336. Pick me pick me! I’m thinking yes for the paperback. Totally want to support you!:)

    Like

  337. Well, this time your signing in NYC is close enough for my son to walk as opposed to the long bus trip he undertook last time. I have sent him the schedule and since it’s near my birthday I think he will show up. I suggested he take some of his women friends this time so he doesn’t stick out like a sore thumb.
    Thanks for all the fun.

    Like

  338. I’m excited to read the additional chapter!

    Like

  339. You don’t have to put me in the drawing, I’m just disappointed that I am not able to get the bonus chapter because I bought the hardcover.

    Like

  340. Got my pre-order in…delivery March 5th…WooHoo!!!! I love your blog and you make me laugh so hard I pee my pants. Not a nice to to do to an old person…..

    Like

  341. I’ve only just started reading ‘Let’s Pretend…] (I received the hardcover for Christmas), and every time I giggle my husband wants to know what’s so funny, so I have to go back and read it to him out loud. Reading this way will probably mean it will take me twice as long as normal to get through your book, since I have to read it twice. Once to myself, and once out loud to my husband. Cheers.

    Like

  342. Let’s just both pretend I’m a regular commenter who usually contributes long & thoughtful responses to your posts & not just some bloke hoping for a Bloggess Geek-A-Week trading card. Deal? Deal.:)

    If it helps any, I did get your book and even attended one of your signings! You hugged me because my shirt said I was a Hug Ambassador.:)

    Like

  343. Tried to leave comment earlier, but the internets hate me… I want the new chapter! (And a signed card would be awesome too!)

    Like

  344. But, I want my chapter!!

    Like

  345. Me! Me me me! I would love a signed something I can use as a bookmark! (either that or I was just warming up for a solo or some sort)

    Like

  346. It’s a Sasquatch Feeder!

    See you in St. Louis. Road Trip!

    Like

  347. I love that Augusten Burroughs’ review is on the cover saying he read & enjoyed your book! It’s even better because you’re right next to him on my bookshelf… by you I mean your book and by him I mean 4 of his books.

    Like

    KatPerez recently posted Twitter has ruined me!.

  348. 349
    Bekki Crocker

    I found out about you through a friend of mine who said she heard about your book and it sounded as weird as me! I loved it and laughed out loud at it. Thank you for keeping me entertained.

    Like

  349. I LOVED the book, which I have for my kindle. Will have to get the paperback. Hope i win the trading cards!

    Like

  350. Hey Jennie,
    Do you have any signed bookplates left? If I send you a SASE to your po box would you send me one?

    Like

    cynicalbuddha recently posted Ribbit.

  351. You’re not staying local for your tour? I might stalk you for real.

    Like

    Hip-Baby Mama recently posted Caution: Writer At Work.

  352. I can’t wait to see you on your tour! And even though I have it in hardcover, I definitely plan on buying the book in paperback. I NEED to read the new chapter!!

    Like

  353. The extra chapter is it the same as what you had in the Audible addition? That was good stuff!

    Like

    Corey Feldman recently posted The Sexton and the Reaper – Available at Amazon.

  354. I’m recruiting a library-full to come see you in March. Can’t. Wait.

    Like

  355. Yeah – totally on board with the paperback copy! I “loaned” my hardback copy to a friend back in the summer (she was fighting breast cancer and I thought – hey – what better way to pass the time while you are tripping out on morphine than to read Jenny Lawson? You’ll be able to look back on it and think: “Wow. Did that really happen….or was I just that delusional?” heh heh) Anyway – Haven’t gotten the hardcopy back yet – I think it’s on a permanent loan. Maybe I can distract her with a paperback copy while I make a daring escape with the Hardback.

    Like

  356. Thank you for sharing your wonderful (Is that the right word? Oh well, sticking with it…) stories with us. Even re-reading for the upmteenth time, I snort in such an unprofessional manner that I get a seat alone on the bus! Thanks!!!

    Like

  357. I will definitely be ordering my copy! Wish you would come to Mitzi’s in Rapid City, SD.😦

    Like

    Melissa Lawler recently posted I DO Believe in Fairies!.

  358. I am definitely buying the paperback! I’m sooo poor, I’ve been waiting for it to come out! Thanks for the contest…and if you should find your way to Albuquerque, I for one would be excited!

    Like

  359. I bought the hardcover & audiobook for myself & pre-ordered the paperback for a friend’s birthday! So if I find one on a plane, I’m gonna be pissed.

    Like

  360. 361
    Serena Polheber

    Thanks so much for the hours of awkward looks when I giggle out loud at work. It starts a LOT of awesome conversations.

    Like

  361. oh! are the geek a week cards tradeable??

    Like

  362. I am still sad that I never got to hear the audiobook extras, and now you tell me that you wrote another chapter, and IT’S ABOUT ME, and I have to buy another book to read it? Either send me a card, or come to Maryland to read to me. Gaithersburg was too far away last tour, and I had a thing, I’m sure you talk about it in the new chapter……

    Like

  363. I read your book. I loved your book. I made my husband read your book. He loved your book. I see your card. I would love to love your card. Pick me!

    Like

  364. That is truly making the big time, your very own trading card… Awesome.

    Like

    JC recently posted cgwmedia.com.

  365. I’m hoping to come see you on tour … I just have to find someone willing to go on a ten hour road trip … Which I’ve now done. So all that is left is getting over my anxiety … I hope to make it!

    Like

  366. I would love to see you come back to Canada. London, Ontario maybe?

    Like

  367. I’m really looking forward to reading your book. I just recently discovered your blog and it really helped me just be more honest with who I am and not to be ashamed of things I had no control over. Just opening up on my blog has allowed others to open up to me. Turns out, I’m not alone! So thanks.

    Like

    Jackie recently posted January is for Feta Loving: recap edition.

  368. I laughed from the moment I picked up “Let’s Pretend This Never Happened” ’til the moment I put it down again! Someday I intend to read it!

    Like

    Robert K. Blechman recently posted Twelve-Inch Twitterfall in NYC This Week! The Amazing Twitter Sequel Continues!.

  369. So we can all be misplaced misfits together. I would love a new set of bookmarks. My Costco receipt is getting a little dog-eared.

    Kudos on going paperback!

    Like

  370. Ooooh. GaW cards. Woot!! Looking forward to the New Chapter. In case anyone else is wondering, Jenny is REALLY GOOD AT THIS, including the whole book tour thing. Truly. I’ve seen at least two best-selling authors at book signings, and The Bloggess wins at Book Tour hands down.

    Like

  371. 372
    Jessi Torres

    I bought the e-book for my Kindle and a hardcover copy for my best friend as a birthday gift because I knew she’d love it (she did!) and now I have to buy the paperback:) Unicorn Success Club FTW!

    Like

  372. Came to grab the link for this because I was talking it up all weekend at Capricon.
    Stayed for the trading card contest.

    Like

  373. Why do I always have to leave a comment? Can’t I just take one instead? New rule: if you leave a comment, take one with you to keep from disrupting the delicate balance. I’m gonna take comment #308 because: SASQUATCH! PS: I don’t get the obscure reference, but I have a feeling I’m not the only one who doesn’t understand how your mind works.

    Like

    Jenbug recently posted This one time, in New Orleans….

  374. Come to the outskirts of Pittsburgh. No one likes to park downtown.

    Like

  375. I got it when it first came out, but heck, another copy would be just dandy. can’t wait!

    Like

  376. I spent one whole wonderful day reading your book in the laziest fashion. That means I was sprawled on the couch ignoring all responsibility while wishing we we’re real life friends.

    Like

  377. Imma buy the paperback and come to the reading in Portland that will be added to the tour. Obvi. Imma buy it in any format it comes out in. I’m pulling for a graphic novel next time.

    Like

    Joules recently posted Trifextra 53: Where the Wild Things Are.

  378. I bought the hardback instead of the kindle for the autographed plaque to stick in it. Then my little envelope came from Penguin Books and it was empty. So sad. But, really, the story of my life.:-) So, I’ll bite. Trading cards are cool, too.

    Like

  379. I love this book! I can’t wait for the paperback to come out so I can get copies for my friends. If we can’t be friends with you in real life, then we want to pretend we’re friends through the book.:) I promise we’re not scary stalker types; we just love you.

    Like

  380. Miffed that once again New Zealand has been omitted from your book tour itinerary. Something we said?

    Like

    Pam recently posted Onetangi Beachfront Apartments - review.

  381. 382
    Keely Tolbert

    Oh bookmarks…I love bookmarks…

    I kind of hope they make the extra chapter available on e-readers or something. My bookshelves are full to the gills – including the hardcover of your book. *sigh* Plus rumor has it you have another coming out sometime…

    Like

  382. OMG, I am SO glad this is finally coming out in paperback because it was getting expensive buying copies for everyone I knew. This will be much cheaper!
    Though now I sort of feel I have to buy copies for everyone for whom I bought the original and then rip out the new chapter and give it to them with bookbinding tape so that they can tape it into their hardcover editions.
    Maybe this isn’t going to be the money saver I’d originally thought.

    Like

    Erica recently posted My First Mammogram.

  383. Well I never win, but I’m buying your book. Happy, happy, happy.

    Like

    Momma Fargo recently posted You Iz Kind.

  384. Wooo free stuff! Also if i bought the kindle version of the book, is there a way of getting the new chapter? (Besides buying the paperback)

    Like

  385. 386
    John Kirkpatrick

    Perhaps my e-book will magically update with the extra chapter.
    Perhaps Girl Scout Cookies will magically remove 50 pounds from my wasteline over night.

    Like

  386. “It’s a dirty story of a dirty man
    And his clinging wife doesn’t understand.
    Their son is working for the Daily Mail,
    It’s a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer,
    Paperback writer.”

    This is what’s in the new chapter, no?

    Cool.

    Like

    HogsAteMySister recently posted Eco-Disposing While Totally Getting a Green Hernia.

  387. Pretty sure I’ll be a two book owner. And it feels a little stalker-y, so I’ll probably give one of them to someone less fortunate. Like my HR director.:)

    Like

  388. YAY! paperback. I’ll keep my hardcover in a place of honor and carry the paperback with me. It won’t be long before it looks as well loved as the rest of the books that “make the cut” to go with me on my adventures.

    Like

  389. I’m familiar with about a third of the geeks on the cards. Not bad, but I could definitely use some extra education!

    Like

  390. Cuddlefish.

    Like

  391. I am looking forward to buying the paperback!! Hope the Canadian version has the extras!!:)

    Like

  392. Geek-a-week cards? With you and Jen from Cakewrecks? Must check this out…

    Like

  393. Awesome cards! Looking forward to reading the paperback : D. I’ve discovered that for my health and well-being it’s best to read your book in bed surrounded by pillows, with no food or drink to choke or drown on. This is especially true of the audio book.

    Like

  394. Damn, I should’ve shoplifted it. Didn’t even think about that… Oh well.

    Like

    Adrasteia recently posted I think I'm going to take a class..

  395. Heck, I’ve only bought three copies of your book (for gifts, not all for me cuz that would be weird). What’s one more?

    Like

    Karen Peterson recently posted Sometimes, in Order to Move Forward, You Have to Look Back.

  396. 397
    Mindy Hillman

    Jenny,

    My partner and I loved your book so much we have bought it twice so far, and I am sure we will have to buy the paperback too for the extra chapter. You are an amazing woman and an inspiration to misfits, thanks to your book, around the world! Keep being the fabulous woman that is you!! We hope to meet you on your next tour if you make it to Portland, Oregon, again.

    With Love and Admiration – Mindy Hillman

    Like

  397. I’m so sad that you’re coming to KC and I live so far away, Would ever consider coming to Hurley, MO, which has nothing of any interest in it since the mill burned down, the two cafes and the feed store closed? I could meet you at the bottom of our driveway, give you big hugs, and send you on down the road to places where there are actually things besides meth addicts, churches and humping dogs. That seems fair, I think.😉

    Like

    Allison recently posted Milestones.

  398. I hope that the new chapter is available in Canada. On a related note, you should come to Vancouver, BC on your next (and every!) tour!

    Like

  399. Thank YOU!

    Like

  400. I used my mostly (not really) hard earned money to buy your book, taught myself how to read (just kidding, I already knew how), and ignored everybody the whole time I was reading it (this one is true). Your book was more fun than Christmas.

    Like

  401. Oh Precious Roy…

    Like

  402. I’m so glad I got the chance to meet you at your signing here in San Diego for your Hardcover tour. Yes, it is great to know that I’m not the only fucked up weirdo in the world!
    The geek cards look awesome; I can’t believe I haven’t seen them before!

    Now….. off to plan ways of stealing the extra chapter of the paperback…..

    Like

    Sara Shelton recently posted 2012 – A year of suck, in review..

  403. I saw a preview for the show ‘Immortalized’ and immediately thought of you. It’s new to AMC, you should check it out.

    Like

  404. I just want to say that you’re book is fabulous! True it makes me feel like I am not the only weirded one out there. But the best enjoyment I got was reading to my husband to let him see that there is other crazy fmilies out there besides mine. Granted no bobcats (unless you count the hybrid one i rescueswhen I was little)t i do have an uncle shot by a dog and an aunt at was shot by the stove.

    Like

  405. Pick me!

    Like

  406. I hope the new chapter is available in Canada.
    I’ll be mighty sad if it’s not.

    Like

  407. Geek-a-week cards….Yes please
    I’m not trying to sway your decision here or anything but so far I have bought 3 copies of your book (sadly none with the extra chapter, we are way behind the times here in New Zealand so probably won’t get it for ages) and have another copy to buy for a birthday present.

    Like

  408. oooh trading cards! Want!

    Like

    Liz recently posted All Grown Up.

  409. That would be such an awesome bookmark to use in my copy of the book!

    Like

  410. an extra chapter?! no fair! now i want the audio AND the paperback to add to the hardcover (which is still in residency on my nightstand nearly a year on — because it’s awesome, not because I’m an incredibly slow reader).

    Like

  411. As a purchaser of the hardback book, I was trying to think of creative ways to put the paperback to use once I’ve read the new chapter. My initials thoughts were: a bird’s nest, a handheld fan, a really unlevel table leveler, a one-time use mop? Then I decided to Google it and realized that I am really not creative. But whoever this is is:
    http://www.thenester.com/2011/09/20-ways-to-decorate-with-book-pages-and-other-things-about-the-book-party.html

    Like

    Tarl recently posted My So Called Childhood: Vagina Burn.

  412. I received your book for Christmas. It was the only thing I asked for. My husband and daughter would look at me as I was reading it, because I would just start laughing out loud. Loved it…

    Like

  413. Oooo, oooo, I need one of those cards! And the paperback works out great since I gave my copy to my aunt for Christmas. Then, if you reissue a hardback with the extra chapter,I will get that one as back up for the paperback. And naturally, I will need the audio book for driving.

    Like

  414. These trading cards are fantastic. Loved the book, looking forward to getting the paperback. Cant wait to see you in Paramus!

    Like

  415. I think you should persuade the publisher that you have to personal visit Canada on the account of missing chapter. C’mon, what could be more conducive for book sales than retelling it live?

    Like

  416. 417
    Derek Kupper

    I’m totally buying it to leave on a plane after I read the chapter.

    Like

  417. I never win anything, so I figure what’s the harm in giving this a try?

    Like

  418. I really, reall, REALLY need that Geek-a-Week “bookmark” for at least one of my copies of your book!

    REALLY.
    😉

    Like

  419. Love the book!

    Like

  420. Definitely going to be buying the paperback. After reading the chapter, I’ll give it as a gift. The people I’ve given copies of the hardback to LOVE it!

    Like

  421. Yes! I’m pre-ordering several copies to give out as gifts. That way I don’t have to worry about getting my copy back when I lend it out:)

    And those cards are beyond awesome.

    Like

  422. So excited to see you in Dayton!:)

    Like

    Anna in Ohio recently posted New Food Find.

  423. I❤ trading cards!

    Like

  424. I like your ideas about doubling up. (I have the hardback.) Just read a review by someone in Australia. You sure do get around.

    Like

    Kathleen recently posted Evolution Sunday.

  425. I would just die for these cards. I’d be the epitome of cool. Cooler than cool. UUBER cool!!

    Like

    uniqueweirdness recently posted I’m Sorry, You Have the Wrong Number.

  426. I have every other American version, so I need the paperback to complete my set, right?

    Like

  427. Sign me up for those bookmarks!

    Like

  428. How I would love the card! I feel like it would make up for not skipping my last lab of the semester to go see you when you were here (keep in mind, I’m the instructor, not a student) and because you appear to not be coming back to San Antonio this time around!

    Like

  429. So, i bought the hard cover and loved it, but i think i am just going to go in the store and read the last chapter there. Win Win.

    Heather

    Like

  430. if ever you make it across the border to canada i will be the happiest strange misfit of all😀

    Like

  431. I’d adore one of your geek-a-week cards…but I have to ask if Wil Wheaton has one in that deck?

    Like

  432. I hope the extra chapter is available in Canada too – we love us some Jenny too! Can’t wait for your next book:)

    Like

    Cheryl recently posted Kiss My Grits!!!!.

  433. A new chapter?!?! That’s totally worth buying it again:) And hopefully a geek-a-week trading card:)

    Like

  434. Meeeeee pick me pick me

    Like

  435. 436
    Malinda - The Diva

    Ooooh yes! I want one! PLEEEEEEEASE!! Plus, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for coming to Cincinnati!!! Really, anywhere in Ohio — I would have traveled! I can’t wait to see you!!! And a bonus chapter, too??? YAY!!

    Like

  436. me please!

    I loved your book so much! My husband was very glad when I was done reading because my cackling laughter was keeping him awake.

    I also think our cats should marry, Jenny. Lily Mae and HST are made for each other! They both try to strangle us with love. They are also close in age and a bit “special”…Lily has OCD. But she’s lovey and beautiful and is Miss December on the SPCA’s calender this year.
    They won’t live together because I am NOT moving to Texas! They can skype each other.

    Like

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  437. 438
    adventure_chick

    Huh…too broke to buy the paperback but I may cheat and read the extra chapter in the bookstore! Still loving my hardback copy!

    Like

  438. I think I deserve a Geek-a-Week trading card/book mark…..as I’ve given MANY copies of the hardcover to my suspecting friends (who are those that I send links to your blog to weekly), my unsuspecting friends, and my family members (who have long thought that OUR family was the oddest on earth. Clearly, we are only a close second….and I bow down graciously!) …..

    PS I went to our local independent bookseller last week to purchase 10 copies of the PB to sprinkle around, and was informed that I would just have to wait…..I’m such a horrible waiter, but I’m trying!

    Like

  439. I would love a Geek-a-Week trading card. Thankyouverymuch.

    Like

  440. Wish your book tour was coming to Alaska. But since the state tried to kill you on your last visit, I can understand why it didn’t make the list!

    Like

  441. Just a note to let you know that your blog brings me joy and a lot of laughs (and I follow you on twitter – so keep on tweeting!). You seem to be a crazy amazing person; you have a great attitude. Thank you. I haven’t read the book yet, but maybe I will now that it’s in paperback.

    Like

  442. Your book is amazing. You should come to Canada so I can come see you. I had to miss it last time because of stupid work… for some reason they expect me to attend if I want to get paid. bastards. I made my friend read your book, you are the coolest. Its unbelievably comforting to see someone else with similar conditions as me and accomplishing everything i want

    Like

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  443. Pick me! Pick me!
    I’ve read your book, book clubbed your book, and read passages aloud to my husband and son so many times that they no longer cringe at the word vagina. Everybody wins. Love you. Thanks for your book and even more for your blog!

    Like

  444. So where does one get a ‘sonic hairdryer’ for their TARDIS (for that mater, where does one find a TARDIS?)

    Like

  445. I already have tickets to see you in St Louis!

    Like

  446. I just bought the Kindle-version of your book. It was supposed to be my “pause book,” but that didn’t work out. You see, I am a Norwegian student studying English literature in England at the moment, and as I never even try to understand my own limits, I signed up for 4 literature modules this semester. 37 Novels in 12 weeks would normally be fine. One pause book (book to read in between studying) per 14 days – easy peasy… Then your book arrived.

    I’ve now pissed my flatmates off by laughing too hard, got told to leave the library once and completely neglected my studies. This led to a rather embarrassing discussion in class today, where I tried to argue that the main character’s caretaker was a vampire, while he was in fact a pedophile. I think even my teacher was impressed by the way I talked my way out of that one. Thanks❤!

    Like

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  447. pick me please! I’ll even give your book as birthday presents for the next year!!! (not that i havent been doing that already…)

    Like

  448. 449
    Stephen Jeffrey

    Comment! Already have the book on kindle but might import it for the extra chapter, i know others that should read it anyway

    Like

  449. Geek-a-Week trading cards? Why have I never heard of these?

    Like

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  450. 451
    ellemichelle

    if you pick me to win the trading cards/bookmarks, i promise i’ll go out & buy the paperback!

    you know you could use any leftover trading cards as framed art in your haunted doll house, too.

    Like

  451. I’m sad you’re not touring near my town, but I can’t wait for the paperback version of your book! I had to check the hardback version out of the library and then circulate it around my family and friends. It was overdue, but my mom had to reread some of the earlier chapters. Apparently, they were ‘a lot like back home’. Looking at my grandparents in a whole new way…

    Like

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  452. Very cool trading cards. I would love some too.

    Like

  453. Love the trading cards – coming to see you at the book signing in STL!

    Like

  454. My sister and I both loved the book. Any idea if the new chapter will be updated to the kindle version???

    Otherwise, I will have to lurk in a bookstore hoping no one notices me reading it and then putting it back on the shelf.

    Like

  455. 456
    Kimberli Nelson

    I can’t wait to see you in Chicago!!!!! Eek!

    Like

  456. You rock!

    Like

  457. Looking forward to picking up the softcover and its extra chapter of goodness.

    Like

  458. I definitely want the Geek-a-Week cards! I’m also a bit jealous that the paperback has an extra chapter. :-)

    Like

  459. Trading cards you say?!?! Sign me up. I used to love to throw playing cards and hockey cards at the cats. Now, the munchkin is about to become the age where that will be fun for her too. They cats will love it as well. Woohoo!!!

    Like

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  460. I’m lazy. Being lazy, I downloaded your book on my Kindle around four a.m. after having too much wine,while looking for something to do besides listen to my husband snore. Well, to be fair he might not have been snoring, but I imagine he was since he normally does. Anyhow, I never sleep (I am not on drugs, I just can’t sleep. I know, it sounds suspicious), so I downloaded your book and finished it that night. I think I should get an “A” for effort because I was also drunk. Drunk reading is HARD. Also, since I have no actual book and I live in Italy where I can’t buy your book and the postmen people STEAL EVERYTHING I can’t order it either. Well, actually, maybe if I could find someone to package the book in box of tampons, then maybe the bastards won’t take it. Anyhow, my point is that I could use the geek cards for other purposes that I’m not sure of yet, but could be after another bottle of wine.

    Like

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  461. Show Seattle some love!!! Head this way on your tour (or at least throw a set of Geek-a-Week up this way maybe?!? No?!?!?)

    Like

  462. Ooh ooh ooh! Have the book already (but thanks for jipping me the new chapter), must have the cards. MUST. Have.

    Like

  463. Oh! Cards! And yay paperback! Will definitely have to pick that puppy up when it’s out.

    Like

  464. 465
    Christa Froome

    Sweet Jeebus Crap!!! You’re The Doctor!!!

    Like

  465. 466
    Procrastinateher

    Can I just buy the extra chapter, and attach it to my current copy like it was some kind of creature created by Frankenstein?

    Holy pickles, those trading cards look amazing. If you’d like, I could bribe you with pictures and/or stories of my adorable, ‘special’ kitty.

    Like

  466. I’m canadian I hope our version does have an extra chapter though I have my copy in he audio version I want to buy it for one of my messed up friends to read

    Like

  467. You mean I spent more money and I’m getting screwed out of laughs? That’s f’d up!

    Like

  468. Not sure what could be better than a geek of the week card featuring one of my web favorites.

    Like

  469. Awesomesauce!!!

    And you need to come closer to lower Alabama someday (pretty please with a taxidermied rodent on top)!

    Like

  470. YIPPEE…..I need bookmarks!
    And BTW….my husband also read your book (after I finished it) and his favorite word now is BASKETTI. Thanks, now it pops up all the time!
    Congrats to you…..you are a breath of fresh air, Jenny!

    Like

    Jan recently posted LOVE.

  471. Those cards are seriously awesome! I will probably buy a paperback copy of your book even though I already have the hardback. I musts have that extra chapter!

    Like

  472. Hell yes!! I want a card. I may even let you sit in my above ground tornado shelter, cleverly disguised as the TARDIS. Drinks will be served.

    Like

  473. Just LOVE YOU! I was given your book for Christmas and I have my teenage daughters reading it! They love it too! Every once in a while I will get a random text with a quote from your book:) Love it! Thanks for your story!

    Like

  474. Cool Geek Cards! Yes Please.. OMG, Jenny. Did you see they have a new competitive taxidermy show coming on AMC called Immortalized?

    Like

  475. Ooooh…I already have a signed copy of your hardcover book, but…I probably need the paperback. Yep. Also, I need the sweet, sweet nerdy goodness of Geek-a-Week trading cards. They make me happy-laugh, as my husband says.:) So fantastic!

    Like

  476. Those cards are awesome! I loooooove it! Please pick me!

    Like

  477. I love that you voiced the audiobook. You did a great job. Even though I had already read the hardback, hearing you read it made it so enjoyable. I can’t remember when I’ve laughed so hard. Can’t wait for the paperback with the bonus chapter. Would love the trading cards.

    Like

  478. OMG – love the Geek cards! Now i can replace the Bloggess stick puppet miniatures that I taped to my friend’s rear view mirror. Or just leave them and “vandalize” something else. Yay!

    Like

  479. Why is the title of this post “Buy My Birdfeeders” and there is no mention of birdfeeders in the post?!?!?!?!?!?!?! But I like prizes!:) And birdfeeders.

    Like

  480. Oh, PLEASE sign me up for the geek giveaway! I am so psyched to get the paperback, as I missed you on your last tour. So I’m holding out hope that you make it to LA. Also, when you are here, you need to check out Clockwork Couture in Burbank, where they have a life-sized Tardis replica (sadly, not as big on the inside) sitting outside of their store. If you feel like just seeing it, you can sneak, take a picture and leave (no crowds to deal with!). If you feel a bit more adventurous, inside the store they have all kinds of steam punk jewelry and Victorian clothes. Kick ass.

    Also, I saw a plastic replica of James Garfield at Whimsic Alley in Hollywood. It’s a Harry Potter store (even has The Great Hall). But they also sell Dr. Who, Twilight, Hunger Games, LOTR and Hobbit stuff. And no, I make no money from telling you this.

    Like

  481. Just so you know, I ordered the Kindle version and so I am going to shoplift the paperback just to read the new chapter. Or maybe I will just read it in the bookstore and then leave a dollar in the back of the book I read from as compensation to the person that actually buys the book I use. I think that’s fair!

    Like

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  482. I’m a female taxidermy asst. It’s really true. I want a bookmark……

    Like

  483. We will see you in St. Louis. I will get to meet you have drink. It’s a win win

    Like

  484. You have your own trading card? I did not know that.

    Like

  485. If I buy another book-book, my house will collapse from the sheer weight of them all so will this super-new extra chapter be included on Kindle editions?

    Like

  486. You’ve probably heard, but just in case you haven’t, there is a new tv show starting this Thursday
    (Feb. 14) about taxidermists!
    Love your book; favorite part is the giant chicken at the front door.

    Like

  487. 489
    Laurie Henderson

    I loved the book. Even let my friend dead the 1st chapter on mykindke fire so she would get hooked on you & buy her own…..& she did. She is now a blogess reader & I’m getting her a t shirt for hrt birthday… thanks for being you!!!!!

    Like

  488. Well, I’m bummed about the extra chapter – and bummed that you’re not coming to MI. Bummer.

    Like

  489. Pick me!! Pick me!!! I bought your book on my kindle and didn’t get the extra chapter (throwing a temper tantrum) and NOT happy that San Antonio, Texas is not a stop on your tour (having another temper tantrum) Anyway, would love to get picked to use it as a bookmark, even though I wouldn’t need it for the kindle, so I will frame it instead, which is why you should pick me. -T

    Like

  490. Geek-a-Week? Hell yeah! I’m now glad that I haven’t gotten around to buying the book. Extra chapter! More Jenny!

    Like

  491. A) loving that you’re in Doctor mode on your trading card. That is epic.

    B) Since I bought the book on my e-reader when it came out, I’m just going to spend 10 minutes in Barnes and Noble reading the new chapter, laughing like a lunatic. In other words, my usual Saturday night.

    Like

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  492. Love the bookmarks…and as my family gets me the pretty bookmarks every Christmas from Barnes and Noble that are metal and potentially a lethal weapon (turn a corner to quick and they fly out of the book) this would be awesome…and as a side note my son shot is first deer this year…the head is still in the garage as we have made a family project out of trying to preserve it…

    Like

  493. Geeeeeeeeeeeek!

    Like

  494. Oo love the cards!

    Like

  495. Loved it in Hardback and I will love it in paperback. And I have about 12 fucked up friends to pass it on to! Thanks for being transparent with your crazy so the rest of us don’t have to feel alone. XO

    Like

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  496. Why in the fuck would you thank us?

    You’re the one who wrote that fabulous mother fucker. We should all be thanking you. It’s one of the best books I’ve ever read.

    Like

    Stephen Battey recently posted This apple tree is raining cats..

  497. 499
    Dyani Washburn

    Love the trading cards! Hopefully they will be on sale for us sad contest losers!

    Like

  498. Just yesterday I recommended this book to a friend! It’s funny every time. :) I’ll be getting the paperback just for that chapter. That was some evil planning there…..

    Like

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  499. 501
    Lindsay Barker

    Still wish you were coming closer to me, but I’ll settle for being able to afford the book.:)

    Like

  500. 502
    Ellie Bryant

    Geek-a-Week? Wow. Trading card nerdvana. Yessss!!!!

    Like

  501. Can’t wait to buy the book!

    Like

  502. Stopped by Barnes & Noble and had them put an alert on my name so I’ll know when the paperback is in. I listened to the CD; it’s hard to drive when you’re out of breath from laughing. Just sayin’.

    Like

  503. I’m going to the KC book signing, where I will be getting one of your books! Do I get a card?:)

    Like

  504. Bloggess trading cards? Wouldn’t trade mine for anything!

    Like

  505. No love for Philly makes me a sad panda😦 but I did add your book to my wishlist on Amazon and will be getting the paperback version much lighter to transport in my purse

    Like

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  506. LOVE your book! I read it for book club…yeah I have a lot of effed-up friends, go figure. I also teach 8th grade, so your particular brand of effed-up humor is just what I need on a frequent basis. Oh, and I shared it with other middle school teachers, so today’s youth probably doesn’t stand a chance with us teaching them…

    Like

    jan recently posted My New Adventure.

  507. That would be one cool bookmark!

    Like

  508. Oooh, awesome cards! Also, I bought your paperback in England and it totally hasn’t got any new chapters. Which you just said it wouldn’t have. But still. You know. No. Okay. Coffee?

    Like

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  509. I’d say I forgive you for not coming to Vermont but I never expected you would in the first place so I was never upset with you so…I acknowledge that no one wants to come to Vermont for a book signing and hope your time in more awesome states is…fine.

    /passive aggressive comment

    Like

  510. I can’t wait to get your book!!! I’m glad I waited so now I can get the extra chapter.

    Thanks for making my morning each day! I love your blog!

    Like

  511. 513
    Edith parker

    Pick me! Pick me!!!

    Like

  512. New chapter? Woo-hoo! Guess we can read it for our “book club discussion” AGAIN! (excuse to drink a lot of wine and leave the kids with the husbands) Spasms of laughter = abdominal training, right?

    Like

  513. I just finished listening to your audio book last night and I might be in love with you, my dear quirky friend.

    Like

    Rilla recently posted Family Connection 2013, Family Project: Transplanting Tulip Bulbs.

  514. If I buy the paperback will you sign that AND my original hardback when you come to Ohio? I was reading your book on a plane and LOL several months ago- the woman next to me kept trying to move away from me. She must have been a humorless old Hun- I need depends when I read your blog and comments!!!

    Like

  515. May have already been suggested in some form or other, but how about a low cost kindle download if that chapter for those of us who bought the hardcover (and people may buy it to check you out and when they see how freakin’ hilarious you are, then they’ll turn around and buy the whole book, so you’ll get their money twice–serves them right for not having more faith in you and buying the hardcover when it first came out).

    Like

  516. I am SO buying the paperback too. Now come to the Philly area on this book tour so I can get this one signed too!

    Like

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  517. bought the book, read it multiple times, talked my mom into buying it, NEED cards:)

    Like

  518. I bought the book on Kindle – and then was irritated at my Kindle (because it’s the cheap one) that I couldn’t see the pictures very well. So I DEFINITELY plan to buy the paperback. Probably multiple times so I can share you with my friends!

    Like

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  519. Cannot wait to get the paperback, read the extra chapter, then pass it along to one of many friends who need it:)

    Like

  520. How have I never heard of Geek-of-the-Week when it has Peter Sagal, Cakewrecks, AND The Bloggess? WANT.

    Like

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  521. Thank You Jenny for the book,
    from a very strange misfit on the other side of the world

    Like

    mothers little hleper recently posted Goodbye Tubby.

  522. Thank you for the time you put in on this blog. It always makes me look at things a little differently, and it’s nice to get out of your own head from time-to-time.

    Like

  523. I was reading excerpts from your book to my sister as she was driving. We had to stop because she was laughing so hard she couldn’t concentrate on driving. I think she has a whole new view of human resource departments now!

    Like

  524. I am amused that you’re thanking people who shoplifted your book. Also, I read the title of this post and initially thought it said “buy me birdfeeders” and I wondered why you wanted a ton of birdfeeders.

    Like

  525. Definitely glad to find I’m not alone. For years I have said “I got on the wrong bus, and ended up on THIS planet. Now I seem to have misplaced my ticket.”

    Like

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  526. You really need to consider coming to Detroit. I mean you are in Ohio for gods sake and we are much cooler. That said, I can’t wait to read your book. I am also going to get a copy for my son.
    PS I need plenty of book marks and I would need more if you came to Detroit.

    Like

  527. Jenny,
    Every day I check your blog for updates…it’s seriously like the highlight of my day. (Your twitter feed rocks too) Everyone at work knows when I’m on thebloggess.com cause they can hear my laughing!:)

    But seriously, Jenny….as a woman who has lived with anxiety and depression for the past 20 years, all I can do is say THANK YOU SO DAMNED MUCH for making me laugh when nothing else can.

    Like

  528. 531
    Shannon Bast

    Please pick me! Randomly of course.

    Like

  529. Oh, pleeeeease pick me! I have been struggling with the most crippling depression lately, and could really benefit from *something* going my way.

    Like

  530. So excited for you to come to KC and buy your book!

    Like

  531. Ooh… These would look good next to my Star Trek TNG and Dr. Who trading cards!
    Can’t wait for the new chapter:) See you in Cali!

    Like

  532. I’m so happy for your success. Even my husband read your book and he pretty much only reads Wired and maybe my blog. Maybe.

    Like

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  533. Your book made me laugh so hard, there were a few times I was worried there would be a pants-wetting incident. I’m glad to report I am still a fan and not incontinent! Crossing my fingers and toes that I get my hands on some trading cards.

    Like

    Cathy Benavides recently posted Fancy Dress Poll.

  534. These people have a lawn dinosaur. But that’s not the best part! The lawn dinosaur is dressed up for different holidays! I think you need to do this to Beynocé.

    http://lolsnaps.com/news/48493/0

    Like

  535. Please come to St Augustine, Florida. Last time I made my friend drive from North to Atlanta to Buckhead. I was excited to get my book signed but jealous my friend met you and I didn’t

    Like

  536. Love the cards! And your book!

    I was re-reading it while waiting for jury duty. Partially because it made the time go a lot faster, but also in the hopes the someone would see the large chapter titles on the screen and keep me away from an actual trial. LOL!

    Like

  537. GEeeek me!

    Like

  538. Thank you Jenny. Thank you for being WAY better than a douche.

    Like

  539. comment, comment, I love you, comment!

    My 17 year old, chose the 1st chapter of your book for her Forensics Contest. She memorized it, performed it, and won 3rd place!

    Like

  540. Kinda makes me glad I didn’t buy the hardcover book. But I will buy this!

    Ramblings of a Suburban Mom

    Like

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  541. I lent this book out to a co-worker ( I don’t lend out books! People abuse my babies!!) Your book made me cry from laughter so many times! Absolutely love it!!

    Like

  542. Love the book! Might need to get the softcover and give the hardcover to my mom or something.

    Like

    jenphalian recently posted Lemon Pepper Chicken.

  543. We just moved from Cincinnati to Rochester, NY. Had I known that your book tour would stop in Dayton and Cincinnati, I probably wouldn’t have moved. Congratulations on the paperback edition! I can’t wait to pick up another copy.

    Like

  544. My hubby will be purchasing your paperback book for me as part of my Valentine’s Day gift (I already have the hardcover, but the only way to go to the signing in St. Louis is to buy a ticket that includes a book…and two drinks! Win!)

    Like

  545. I adore your website and loved reading your book. I actually bought a copy for a friend just so I would have someone to talk to about it. She loved it too!!

    The best part of the website is that it helps me keep perspective on the icky crap going on and that sometimes that voice in our head lies to us. Unless it’s talking about chocolate, then it never lies:)

    Like

  546. This book was life-alteringly funny…paperback will make lovely gifts for my friends who need their lives altered! :)

    Like

  547. Since I already have three copies of your book: won a preview copy on Goodreads, bought the hardcover, and the audio book, I’m not sure if I’ll invest in the paperback. (I may just go to the bookstore and read the new chapter in the coffee shop. Don’t judge). Anyway, I’d still love to have a “Geek of the Week” trading card for a bookmark. I see you still haven’t added “Wolverine” to your tour schedule yet. Hope your publicist gets on that tout suite.

    Like

  548. 551
    Pat C in Washington

    I can’t remember if I told you this before (I’m old, give me a break) but I helped advertise your book too. I was reading it at work (at lunch, honest!) and was laughing so hard I was having trouble breathing. OK, apparently I wasn’t precisely breathing at all but making whooping sort of noises. Since I am old and retiring in 140 days (but who’s counting…OK apparently I am), my co-workers thought they should call 9-1-1 or offer asthma inhalers. I was able, by way of primitive hand gestures, to kibosh that idea, and eventually communicate that I was laughing, not dying. I showed them the book and gasped out “very funny!” then went to the bathroom to change my undies.

    Like

  549. I already bought the book once, so I’ll just pirate the extra chapter…

    …and by that, I mean talk my sister into buying herself a copy and steal a peek at the extra chapter. I’m not sure how pirates will be involved, but I’m not making any assumptions when it comes to you Jenny.

    Like

  550. a new chapter and cards?! Bloggess FTW!

    Like

  551. Loved your book! Read the ebook over Christmas Break & laughed so very hard! Looking forward to Bloggess trading cards. Thank God for your blog – I need something to keep me going until your next book comes out.

    Like

  552. 555
    Fictionfiend

    Buy the paperback version, too?
    That would make two copies for me.
    With three you get eggroll?

    Like

  553. What the what???? You have trading cards? That is awesome! I already have tickets to come see you in Illinois! #10 and #11 watch out!

    Like

  554. Just got some rough test results back from the doc, and I was a little bummed….until I got on here and read about you thanking me for shoplifting your book. For the smiles you have given me, I will be happy to shoplift TWO copies of the paperback!:) Thank you, Jenny….you make me smile on my darkest days.

    Like

  555. I loved your book and I plan on buying it in paperback. I just wish your tour was passing though my area.

    Like

  556. “Reveal yourself tiny songstress!”

    Like

  557. Any chance book 2 will be out before next Christmas? Love your book(s) for the hard to shop for folks on my list.:)

    Like

  558. Those cards look great

    Like

  559. So… I tried to see you iin Chicago last summer while I was visiting there but tickets were sold out.. So now, closer to home, I’ll get to Phoenix to see you.
    Thanks for letting us all know that the best way to be successful is to be yourself!
    LOVE YOU! (not in a creepy way, but a “you’re so great” way)

    Like

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  560. Stumbled across your book and loved it…….

    Like

  561. I heard about your book when my best friend called me, in tears. She read one line from it to me, and I nearly fell out laughing. I was traveling across country, moving by myself, and I downloaded the audiobook at the next wifi hotspot. The entire drive we voice messaged each other “have you read this yet?” “did you get to this part?” “oh, holy hell… just wait until you meet Jenkins”. It made a long drive a whole lot more bearable. That was almost a year ago, and I’ve stalked friends and family with requests to buy your book. They are always glad they did!

    Like

  562. I already have two copies of your book, but I’m sure I’ll get the paperback too!

    Like

  563. Okay…I bought the hardcover-PREORDERED…then bought the Nook version…then bought the audio on itunes…if I win a card I promise to buy the paperback to complete my Bloggess collection and then we both win!

    Like

    Joanna recently posted Lesson learned.

  564. Oh! Me! Pick me!

    Incidentally, I recently talked a friend through a crisis and into a treatment facility. I told him what I learned from you: Depression lies.

    Like

  565. 568
    Jessica Churchill

    I pre-purchased the kindle edition and loved it, but I’m looking forward to reading the paperback because I’m really old fashioned and like holding books in my hands.

    Like

  566. Is it selfish of me to want a Texas stop set in place for your book tour considering that you live here? Or are we Texans just supposed to carry around a copy of your book and stalk you? I’m sorry, I was late to the Bloggess party, so I wasn’t around for the first tour. I don’t know the proper etiquette for stalking in this regard.

    I’m totally dedicated now, though, so if I’m supposed to just mosey around the state looking for you in random places, just say the word.

    P.S. I’m totally harmless. I’d probably just stare or awkwardly wave if I did see you.

    Like

  567. Thanks for writing it!

    Like

  568. Definitely sorry I moved out of the Cinci/Dayton area, but awesome bookmarks would be a great consolation prize.😉 Your blog is brilliant, the book is absolutely hysterical, and you are an inspiration.:-)

    Like

  569. I was just going to get the book from work, but I may now have to buy it for the new chapter. I’d love the bookmarks. I collect them!

    Like

  570. Is there a Will Wheaton one? Would love one! And Bloggess one. Yes…:)

    Like

    that white girl... recently posted White Girl In Stripper Town?.

  571. 574
    Elizabeth M.

    Oh holy shit. You replied to me in my comment. I’m squeeing. I think I just peed myself.

    I’ll see you on March 7th, and it really can’t get any better. Get to see Jenny, then I get to go to Florida to see the Detroit Tigers in Spring Training. OMGOMGOMGOMG

    Like

  572. I wanna card!

    Like

  573. 576
    cactus sally

    I would like to have a Geek-a-week card! I bought your premium signed book ($125) and your regular retail priced book (and likely will get the paperback as well.) The reason the premium one was so expensive was because before I knew you were coming to NC, I had my cousin in San Antonio go to a bookstore where you were making an appearance and get a signed copy for me, which he then mailed. When I sent him the money for the book, I also included little gifts for each of his three children which meant I could not use a business sized envelope. So packaging became larger along with shipping costs, and I didn’t want him to think he was my own personal procurement center, so I threw in a little extra for his trouble and the cost of gas. Did you see how big San Antonio is? That’s a lot of driving, for which I was extremely grateful. Anyway, I was thrilled that I got a signed book in Charlotte AND you signed my Weasels Gone Wild picture for me. The Geek-a-Week card would be a nice accompaniment to my WGW picture. Hang in there on this tour. Do it for the Gipper. or the stripper. I’m not sure how that quote goes. Flipper?

    Like

  574. I am so terribly excited to see you in Chicago! I actually tried to go the last 2 (I think?) times and couldn’t. I totally bought 2 copies of the book for the signing so I can give one to my best friend for her birthday.

    Like

  575. Pick ME!!! Pick ME!!!! I just cannot WAIT till you are in San Francisco. Geek crush alert!!!! *not, NOT stalking* just sayin’…

    Like

  576. ❤! Love the book, and can't believe I missed you when you were in San Antonio. (One of the few times I was out of town.)

    Like

  577. I will be driving 3.5 hours to see you in Paramus, NJ on March 5. I can’t wait!!! You totally rock (and if you can add a few more stops, say Philly, Baltimore, or even Harrisburg, PA, that would rock even more.)

    Like

  578. My mom bought me your book for christmas. She broke down and read it before she gave it to me. Its crazy how much your dad is like mine. Reading this blog is the highlight of my week. Thank you for being so awesome.

    Like

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  579. I am a perfect winner for “Geek of The Week” cause I have pink hair and I teach math to urban kids. What is real life geeker plain than that?

    Like

  580. Do you analyze dreams?

    Like

  581. I can always use a bookmark!

    I’ll also have to snag a copy of your book now that it’s in paperback!

    Like

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  582. I already have the hardcover but I think I’ll be getting the paperback for that extra chapter:)

    Like

    Chaos Mandy recently posted Sickness and Sailor Moon.

  583. Oooh, I would LOVE a geek-a-week card! How fun. Any chance you can stop off in San Diego again? I missed you on the last tour. 😦 Actually, maybe I’ll plan a trip to Phoenix…that way I can meet you AND avoid seeing the in-laws who are planning on being in SoCal at the same time…Genious!

    Like

  584. I’m going to have to buy the paperback because I lent me hard copy to a friend and then she lent it to a friend and the friend “lost” it. And by lost I think she likes it and decided to keep it, so she’s an asshole with good taste.

    Like

    The suzzzz recently posted Dear Oral Surgery.

  585. I have the hardback but I will buy the paperback just for the extra chapter. Yeah, I’m that kind of fan.

    Like

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  586. :O I alwasy need new interesting bookmarks…having bills as bookmarks isn’t fun

    Like

  587. Pick me! I would love to win a Geek-a-Week trading card.

    Like

  588. 591
    Mrs Crabtree

    So, I told me friend about Beyonce the metal chicken an then she fell in love with you and she brought me your hardcover book for my last birthday as well as her own copy (the best BFF EVER) and last week she was diagnosed with Breast Cancer (which sucks so much that calling it a douche canoe doesn’t even come close to describing cancers ‘doucheness’) So my BFF is awesome and will be reading lots in the coming months of treatment and NEEDS some bloggess love in the form of a signed Geek of the week card, please. Also I wish I was making this shit up but I’m not and this request is what I can do for her.

    Like

  589. I could be your stalker of the week. Have your hardback version. Then my super cute roommate/husband asked me to put some crappy mystery audiobook on his ipod for long distance runs (as in “running”, not “the runs”). Instead, I downloaded your audiobook for a fun surprise for him. And you are totally “mysterious”, so I’m pretty sure I got the genre right. Now he likes to tell me stories about his “friend Jenny” when he gets back from his runs–which is nice that he likes you now since I bought him an 8 1/2 foot big metal chicken for our 15th anniversary last year and I think he had some pent up issues about that. Couldn’t find a 5-footer, so I had to settle. I added uplighting on the chicken, btw, and it looks amazing. The neighbors love me. Can’t wait to see you in KC…to complete the trifecta with the paperback version. Thanks for the laughs.

    Like

  590. I’m going to get the paperback version when it comes out. Because I’m broke and cheap and I need to read your book.

    Like

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  591. You owned the Doctor look, you are now forever immortalized as a female Doctor – Go Bloggess!

    Like

  592. I bought the Kindle version. Read it. Loved it. Laughed. Cried. Some of it hit way too close to home. Great job!

    Like

  593. I have never seen these cards before in my life – they are so awesome! No wait, they are shoooo awshum! Love your writing and ability to create laughy, funny stuff. Please for writing a new book?

    Like

  594. Love bookmarks! And paperbacks with extra chapters…

    Like

  595. I’d just like to say : box falls out of the sky, man falls out of the box, man eats fish custard, and look at you, just sitting there!

    Like

  596. Yay! I missed the first book tour so I am so excited your doing another! Also I’m super excited for the bonus gift of an extra chapter. I can’t wait! Thank you!!!!!!

    Like

  597. No, THANK YOU for being the perfectly awesome person you are and for being a huge champion for those whose need it most!

    Like

  598. 601
    EvylFashionista

    An extra chapter AND a chance to win some Geek-a-Week trading cards?!?! Today just got so much better.

    And many thanks to you for letting all of us here know that we aren’t the only “oddballs” in the world.:-)

    Like

  599. I convinced my whole family to read your book. You are a great author, and incredibly funny!

    Like

  600. Ohhh, new chapter eh?

    Like

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  601. Congrats! Love the trading card idea. I wonder if you would trade for my Wild Ride cards?
    Put Denver on the list next time, or better yet, Boulder!

    Like

  602. Ooh! I want a geek-a-week card signed by you! In fact, I may have to go buy myself a whole set…

    Like

  603. I would love to win the cards! Very cool.

    Like

  604. Awesome! I may have to buy a second copy just to get the extra chapter.

    Like

  605. Trading cards?! You’re so fancy!

    Like

  606. I may have to skip class because… YOU WILL BE IN CINCINNATI!!!! I can NOT wait!

    Like

  607. I am almost through with the book. Love it. Laugh hysterically every time I pick it up, which I desperately need right now. Thanks for writing it and cheering me up! I am fixing to get laid off from my job.

    Like

    Dee recently posted Words of Wisdom from a Stranger.

  608. A new chapter? YAY now I can get it signed when you come to the Bay Area AND get a new chapter! 😀

    Like

  609. I recently found your blog and find you incredibly refreshing and entertaining!

    Like

  610. You mentioned my idea:) (even if I didn’t inspire you, I still feel fancy) oh, and I don’t want a card. I just want you to know I love you❤ platonically, in case asexual teenagers scare you with our nonexistent romantic advances. Also, the library number is my favorite for fancy mathematical reasons. And also because of the library.

    Like

  611. Free stuff? Yes please!! Loved your book!!

    Like

  612. My book club is only me, but I take the questions seriously.

    Thank you for writing the book. Seriously.

    Like

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  613. I WANT THE CARDS. BAD. Please come to Denver. You might have heard that weird stuff happens to wild animals here, too. AKA the elk shot by texting police officers. You would fit right in.

    Like

  614. I LOST my first book. Worse yet, I lost it AFTER I put the signed sticker in it, the thing called a bookplate for some reason I haven’t figured out. So now I REALLY have to buy the paperback and get you to sign it here in Cincinnati!

    Like

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  615. I started reading your book while waiting in the airport security line. Within 5 minutes I was shaking so hard with suppressed laughter that I was worried I wouldn’t be allowed past the ID check. :-)

    Like

  616. I`ll see you when you get to Dayton! (and if I win the trading cards, I can have you sign those, even some random ones if you wish! )

    Like

  617. Your book was the only thing I asked for the whole time leading up to Christmas. I didn’t even ask for a new vacuum after ours prettymuch blew up.. I just used my tiny stick vac that had also broken but continued to run after I used postage tape to reattach the chunk that fell off of the canister housing after sucking up a huge garden spider and then realizing he wasn’t coming out of there without a fight and cracking the plastic while frantically trying to flush him down the toilet. Needless to say, I received your book in hardback Christmas morning, read it in a day and a half, and would absolutely love one of your trading cards to use as a bookmark when I get the paperback for the bonus chapter. I passed your book on to my mom. She and I are from Tomball, TX and her cousin has a cat that had kittens with a possum. i just misspelled that, but I’ll try and find the picture to increase my chances of winning. Congrats on your book!

    Like

  618. I may have to buy the paperback for the extra chapter even though I own the hardback.

    Like

  619. Yes, please. And thank you for being you. It’s good to have f*&ked up “role models” because life isn’t a hallmark movie and we are all a little insane now and again.

    I’d use the signed card for good and give it to my best friend; the one person on earth who gets me and gets you.

    Keep being awesome.

    Like

  620. Love your book! I think my hubby thought I’d gone nuts since I laughed so much while reading the book:)

    Like

  621. You need to add a stop in Little Rock, AR. We love the Bloggess!

    Like

  622. 625
    Ashley Johnson

    I was thrilled to be the first person at my local library to get the pleasure of reading your hilarious book (fucked up as it may be). I find myself telling everyone how funny it is, and that they must borrow it, before I realize that I don’t have my own copy. So yes, I will most certainly be purchasing a paperback copy – HURRAH!

    Like

  623. I have my eye on the paperback… and I hope you come back to MN!

    Like

  624. 627
    full of whimsy

    Pick me! Pick meeee! But seriously. Just wanted you to know you are my hero. For reals. You and Caitlin Moran. Who was introduced to me by you. So I guess that makes you the meta-hero…?
    (P.S. Are you a fan of Regina Spektor? Because if so, GODDAMNIT I WILL BECOME GAY FOR YOU. Too strong? Sorry, you and Victor. Come to Boise soon please!)

    Like

  625. So excited for the soft cover! I got my hard cover signed by you when you came to Canada. I am hoping the extra chapter is in the Canadian version too. It would be even better if you come to Canada again so I can get my soft cover signed too!!

    Like

  626. 629
    Brooke Jensen

    Pick me please!! {Insert shameless ploy here}

    Like

  627. YOUR GEEK-A-WEEK CARD IS NEXT TO JEN FROM CAKE WRECKS GEEK-A-WEEK CARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BRAIN CANNOT HANDLE THAT MUCH AWESOMENESS, EVEN IN A PICTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Like

  628. i was going to ask you what birdfeeders you wanted me to buy. then i decided to just roll with it.
    if i can work up the nerve, i’m going to come and see you in cincinnati.

    Like

  629. Darn you! Sounds like I’ll have to buy a paperback version of your book as well. But you make it impossible for me to hate you.:-)

    Like

  630. 633
    Jen5253 Range

    I haven’t bought the book yet and so I look forward to reading it! And what awesome bookmarks! Thanks for such a fun giveaway!

    Like

  631. I’ve bought two hardcovers so far, got one signed, (remember me, best friend who saved your life? At least thats how I asked you to sign my book) and I’m sure I’ll buy a paperback. I might need professional help.

    Like

  632. So I listened to your audio book while helping my uncle out folding paper at his factory. my only other coworkers was a (nonenglish speaking) hmong couple. I was laughing soo friggeden hard while listening to it on my headphones that i was keeled over with gut wrenching laughter over my folding table. They kept giving me horrible glares and gestures through out the whole book (which just made it way more funny). At one point while in tears I hit the sensor on the table that caused a medal rod of glue to slam down on my arm. It hurt and was sticky but I just laughed all the harder. Thank you so much for sharing your memoirs! I found them to be simply unforgettable. Every chance I get, I tell ppl to buy your book! Thanks again! Please write another book!
    Venessa

    Like

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  633. your book made me cackle out loud at my therapists office, she was terrible and I dumped her, so you win. or at least I think that’s how this works.

    Like

  634. 637
    Rebecca Toon

    oooooooooo pick me, pick me!!!!!!!!! maybe it will make up for not coming to Calgary, Canada!!! xo!

    Like

  635. I should probably buy the paperback now that I’ve lent out my hard cover to all my no-good friends and it doesn’t look like I’ll be getting it back any time soon. The more the merrier!

    Like

  636. You’re coming to Kansas City–not only on a day that is good for me, but during my spring break, when I don’t have to worry about studying. So. You’re just ten kinds of awesome. I’m going to get a paperback for it–excited for the extra chapter; read the hardback from the library.

    Like

  637. Wow. You do realize you just did something most other authors haven’t done before. I mean, besides being awesome. You pulled a stunt like the entertainment industry does to sell more movies. Maybe your next book should only start with 5 chapters. You could drag it on FOREVER!

    Like

  638. 641
    Nadine Mathews

    A comment.

    Like

  639. 642
    Nadine Mathews

    Seriously though, love it!

    Like

  640. My comment is awaiting moderation, which is nice, because the world needs more moderation. As Cicero said, “Never go to excess, but let moderation be your guide.” And in the wise words of that other great philosopher, Lindsay Lohan, “My motto is: Live every day to the fullest – in moderation.” I promise I’m not really a stalker. Just a fan. A fan that likes trading cards. And now I’ve probably triggered the “awaiting moderation”-bot again using the “s” word again. Poo.

    Like

  641. I still have the picture I got taken of you and me when you were in Portland on my phone, makes me happy when I see it! Good luck on your next tour and take care of yourself! We all love you!

    Like

  642. Good news, Jenny and all you Canadians…just checked the Chapters/Indigo website and it DOES in fact advertise the new chapter! So at least we Canadians can get THAT since Jenny’s only touring the States right now! Come up here to The Great White North, Jenny…have some Beaver Tails, play some hockey, build an igloo with us, eh!!

    Like

  643. SQUEEEEE!

    Like

  644. Thank you Jenny… for your courage in telling your story …and with such humour and warmth… that the rest of us are empowered to say, “we too are unique, a misfit, wonderfully warped and utterly fabulous”
    Love,
    Christine

    Like

  645. I’ll take two dozen bird feeders. And a Bloggess trading card please.😉

    Like

  646. I made you a bookmark on my mom’s iPad.

    Like

  647. I have the hardback and the audio, of COURSE I need the paper back to complete my set! The “bookmark” would top it all off perfectly.

    Like

  648. I loved the book!! I grew up in a small town in Oklahoma. It’s good to know Texas is just as crazy. You didn’t have a story about an armadillo that lived under a trailer that would suck worm out of your hand but Jenkins was just as good…

    Like

  649. Thank you, jenny. I missed you when you were in Portland due to social anxiety, i hope you come back so i can try again.

    Like

  650. Yay for giving away stuff after making me buy more stuff!

    I have the hardcover… but now I have to buy the paperback too. If I can actually force myself out of my house this time for the tour date, will you sign both? Or if you get too overwhelmed, you can come hide in my house with me if you want. I have two orange kitties who will help keep us company, and one black one that will stalk and glare. That should make you feel at home, right?

    *Prepares a music list to calm the lying bastard for the tour date day*

    Like

  651. I bought the hardback book but I am still going to buy this one.:) Maybe one day you will make it to an area near me in central Florida or I will be closer to a place you are visiting and I can get you to sign them, in the bathroom of course. Thank you for letting all of know that we are not alone. Not only in mental illness but it pure awesome akwardness.

    Like

  652. best bookmark idea ever… except for maybe David Tennats face

    Like

  653. I’m new to your blog and am HOOKED! I just read all the way back through 2011. So sad I didn’t know about you earlier. Would you care to add a stop to Utah on your book tour?:)

    Like

  654. ooh pick me!

    Like

  655. 658
    Carrie Davis

    Those cards are fantastic. I’d also like one for Cakewrecks, but I guess I’ll have to spam a different blog for that.

    Like

  656. I now cannot fly and read Skymall without thinking of your book. http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=204685671&cm_mmc=VirtualCatalog-_-SkyMall-_-Early%20Spring%202013-_-Link . I feel it is missing a hat.

    Like

  657. Oooh pick me, pick me!

    Like

  658. I wish you were coming my way again! I had to miss you last time because I was sick and selfishly wanted to keep my germs to myself. I can’t wait to buy the paperback copy!!!

    Like

  659. The South African paperback version came with a prescription for antibiotics. So thanks, I guess?

    Like

  660. Oooh, I just discovered you this week. So I get an extra chapter due to blatant ignorance. Woohoo!!!

    Like

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  661. Please pick me! Pick me!!!

    Like

  662. Wow, a lot of comments today! I guess everyone loves a giveaway!

    Like

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  663. Ooooh! Pick me! Yours is one of the few Geek-A-Week cards I don’t have yet.

    Like

    Sharon recently posted I’m using YNAB and I’m determined to succeed!.

  664. I adore you and your quirkiness and I need to win because my knitterfriends and I have a thing for quirky hilarious books and such.

    Like

  665. awe bummer no Upstate NY or PA signings happening yet… Meeting you in person is on my bucket list, so hopefully you do more signings in the future…

    Glad your book is doing well… but really did you ever have any doubts? You are hilarious!!

    Like

  666. We’ll be there in San Fransisco to see ya. Although I still think it’s just an elaborate April Fools joke and when we get there it’ll just be Wil Wheaton sitting at a table collating papers.

    Like

  667. HELP!!! I am yet to figure out how to get the book in India. Seriously….HELP!!!!

    Like

    Shreya recently posted Closer.

  668. 671
    Jessica Larsen

    So excited for the new chapter! My fiancé and I love your book and recommend it to everyone we know!

    Like

  669. YES! Paperback & extra chapter for less?!?! *pulls out wallet* So psyched you’re going to be in SF😀

    Like

  670. If we don’t win the cards…will we be able to buy them ?

    Oh, pretty, pretty please with pink glitter?

    Like

    PB recently posted Finding Joy.

  671. You left off Syracuse (again)! It’s lovely here in the winter!

    Like

  672. yahoo! trading cards!!

    Like

  673. I feel like a pusher or could possibly be your pimp, for all the people I’ve shared your book with. Id never make you share your hoeing money with me like a pusher or pimp, but trading cards would be cool! Just saying…

    Like

  674. My copy of your book seems to be on permanent loan to everyone I know! Which could be a good thing, cause I almost wet myself when reading it, and this is embarrassing when I am in public…. Can’t wait for your second book!

    Like

  675. oooooooo Geek-a-week cards!

    Like

  676. Geek a week cards, yay! Want!:) Ps. Hug your kitties for me:)

    Like

  677. Trading cards!! Want!!

    Like

  678. I probably shouldn’t post this on a contesty post with an abundance of comments, but I just want to say thank you for talking about depression and anxiety like it’s a way of life. I was just reading a blog where this person was all, “I never understood why people take medication for anxiety or depression and I used to judge, but now I know why, and I’m sorry for judging,” and then three sentences later, they talk about how they’re all fixed now and have sorted out their problems (unlike the rest of us who are too [judgment goes here] to do the same?).

    Anyway, we fight it and fight it and tomorrow may be the hardest day yet, but thank God we can be honest about it. Thank God we know it’s something we have to deal with and consider in everything we do because we’re fighters and we refuse to let it become who we are or even pretend that it isn’t at least partly responsible for who we’ve become.

    Sure, I hope you kick anxiety and depression’s ass for good, but even if you don’t, even if I don’t, it doesn’t matter. We’re still awesome even with it.

    Like

  679. Me, me, me! I have a signed hardback, but I sent a copy to my daughter and she NEEDS a signed bookmark:-) When are these cards going to be available to us fans? PS: We are in the UK, if you are only mailing in the US then I will bow out gracefully…well, as gracefully as I do anything. BUT we still need those cards, soon xx

    Like

  680. I’ve always wanted a trading card of myself! You are so lucky!

    Like

  681. The hardback was fantastic, going to have to get the paperback too. The trading card would be like… Orgasmic.

    Like

  682. I will see you in KC. I have got tickets to 2 previous events there and had to miss both of them. I’ve got a good feeling about this one.

    Like

  683. I bought the book to read on my kindle. How about selling the extra chapter the same way?!

    Like

  684. The book will be released in Germany soon. I’m pretty excited!

    Like

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  685. No need for the thanks – your book was fan-fucking-tastic! I’ll buy it again.:)

    Like

  686. Make a smaller version with yet another extra chapter. >8-)

    Like

  687. Having bought your book as a e-book, I guess this is an awesome way to insire I get a paper copy. Well played Bloggess! Well played.

    Like

    Chris Dean recently posted It Was A SAUSAGE!.

  688. I borrowed the book from a friend in book club, which by the way is the book this month! I will be getting the soft bound copy. I can relate entirely to your book and have read many chapters to my husband who at first did not want to hear it, then found himself laughing uncontrollably then saying “hey, that sounds like us” We very much have a relationship like you and Victor. Thanks for the laughs, Robin Bird. No that is not a code name, a secret squirrel name, that is my married name. I have the fortune or misfortune depending on how you look at it to fall in love with a guy named Tony Bird and married him, thus Robin Bird. You are welcome!

    Like

  689. I bought the book for my Kindle and am having buyers remorse. I want the new chapter! Wonder who needs a slightly used copy?

    Like

  690. LOVED your book and will buy it again in soft cover just for the extra chapter! The trading card is awesome and the curlers make you kinda look like princess Leia!

    Like

  691. I bought the paperback-version (none other available) through amazon UK last year, and now feel totally cheated!
    No pretty hardback to help stabilise my tables and no extra chapter – I was robbed, ROBBED I say!

    And I need more bookmarks- my wife is tired of finding little snippets of newspaper everywhere in the house (ok, bathroom – where else do you get some free time to read in peace?) because they are:
    A:small and available bookmarks
    B:too small actually and fall out everywhere
    C…and then I need another one
    D:…and another one…It’s a vicious circle!

    Like

  692. LOve you , love your book and I would love to get the trading cards. I can see the cards framed .

    Like

  693. Geek a week would NOT be in the book. If you signed it, it would be framed. Because I am an obsessive weirdo like that!

    Like

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  694. 697
    Tabitha Crow

    Couple of things: 1) I read an excerpt from the vagina chapter to my husband last night. We decided he would get the lightning bolt and I would get a cloud. Or an umbrella. Or maybe a lightning rod (although that might be better off with him…). Anyway, now that that’s out of the way… 2) I really understand how you felt during pregnancy. I don’t have that disorder that you do, but I have a history of lung blood clots so I had to do 2 injections of Lovonox every day in my stomach. The worst part was when the bruises turned all sickly yellow/green. That’s not the only part in the book that I related to, but I completely sympathized with you on that. I just wanted to let you know that.:) I would love a bookmark, but even if I don’t win, you’re awesome! (And your book makes me laugh so hard that I snot)

    Like

  695. 698
    Kudzu Homecoming Queen

    Me. Me. Pick Me. I’ll loan you my crown.

    Like

  696. Damn, I didn’t know these geek trading cards existed. I need them.

    Like

  697. I originally read on my kindle (and loved it) but now I can’t wait to buy the paperback!

    Like

  698. Bookmark! I NEED me a book mark, see. Very badly. Otherwise all of my books will have the scarlet letter of books for age to come. That being the folded dog-ear corner, of course. I was actually unaware of the scarlet letter of books, until I borrowed one from my sister and she pummeled me mercilessly for it.

    Like

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  699. 702
    lepetitfromage

    No…..thank YOU. Thank you for writing your book, for writing your blog- for having the courage to show people that strange misfits are not only perfectly good people, but in fact are some of the best people out there. Thank you for being our Emperor of Weird. You rock, Miss Lawson.

    Oh and even though I have the hardcover, I am SO buying the paperback because
    A) I will not let other people read that extra chapter without me.
    B) It says “New York Times Best Seller” on it and well, that is just awesome.
    C) You got a freaking endorsement from Augusten Burroughs!! That is just way too much amazing for one book.

    Like

  700. Your book has been by far one of the best of books I have read for years. Thanks for putting your stories out there for everyone to read and relate to.

    Like

  701. Is it unhealthy that I felt pangs of unbridled (only they were “bridled”? because I didn’t act on them. Mind you what would I have done really…) jealousy over the geek-a-week cards?

    Is it wrong that I wanted desperately (only not actually desperate in the sense that I didn’t do anything about it – but only because I don’t know who to beg or offer blow-jobs to) to see my own character printed on one of those cards?

    Is it sad that this is what my life has come to? Don’t answer the last one. Please.

    Like

    Jennifer June recently posted A 14 Year Old Trapped In The Body Of A 42 Year Old?.

  702. I LOVED the book! I passed it on to my boss who also loved it and passed it on to her daughter! We are single-handedly getting everyone in America to read your book, but with only one copy sold….sorry about that!

    Like

  703. Holy crap! I want a geek a week card!

    Also I’m super excited you’re finally coming to Kansas City and I can’t wait!

    Like

  704. I hope I win! I want that Jen card too!!

    Like

  705. I hope I win! I want that Jen card too!! See you in Cincy!

    Like

  706. extra chapter? I’m in!

    Like

  707. Feeling a little cheated on the extra chapter. Is it cheating if I just read it at the bookstore without buying another copy??

    Like

  708. i’m still sad you arent really considering the invite to my home. I have cats. it’s like we were separated at birth. but only by many years, different mothers, different states- all technicalities.

    I WANNA WIN

    Like

  709. Hey, so what about a tour up here in Cananda… Show some love to your fans up here… I promise we’d make it worth your while.

    Like

  710. Geek a week! awesome! also, your book made me snort. on a plane. awkward.

    Like

  711. I get the giggles every time I think “Frankengyna”. It kinda pops into my head during pap tests, the Dr was like “what the F***”.

    Like

  712. I am thrilled that the book has gone to paperback. Probably not as thrilled as you are, but still. Are you buying more strange/interesting stuff on eBay than before the book ?

    Like

  713. Yay! I can’t wait to read the extra chapter

    Like

  714. You are famous. And awesome. And on a trading card.

    Like

  715. I absolutely loved this book. I would be honoured to have a trading card. Sign me up:)

    Like

  716. I’m so so so so excited to see you when you come to Kansas City!!! It’ll so be worth the 2+ hour drive!!!!!!

    Like

  717. 720
    Krystine McCants

    I love those cards! Pick me, pretty please?!?

    Like

  718. Is that a male mouse?

    Like

  719. 722
    KMac the Knife

    I would really like some Geek cards. Please! Also, in your picture on your geek card, you sort of resemble Lilith from Cheers/Frasier. I think it might be the suit. I totally mean this as a compliment. Do I win? Is this a weird time to ask you about visiting Colorado on your tour?

    Like

  720. me! me! pick me!
    i have no good or witty reason for why you should pick me.
    other than the fact that i want it.

    please?

    Like

  721. I’m coming to see you when you’re in Chicago! I bought your hardcover, and now the paperback, and I’m considering bringing a Beyonce statue for you to sign…..and of course I need trading cards to use as a bookmark.

    I promise not to leave any sleepy kittens on your table. Unless you want me to.

    Like

  722. I love you, love your book, would so love to meet you at a book signing but you are not coming anywhere near me (FL) this time around (planned strategy?). However, a Bloggess trading card/bookmark would soften the blow a little… Either way, I still love you and you make me laugh a lot ~ so thanks!!!

    Like

    Sam recently posted A drop in the bucket (list)....

  723. Who looks at a hair dryer and thinks, “Ooh, this could be a little more sonic?”

    No, wait, actually that would be genius. Would it do my hair for me?

    Like

  724. You know I have to get the paperback! I have to see the extra chapter.:) And I just loaned my hard cover to my son’s girlfriend. We were on the subject of taxidermy and whether or not she would allow it in her house. My son seams to think that having it would be awesome. I told her to read your book and then make an informed decision! Evil of me right? hahaha. And she has depression and anxiety issues too. So I told her it really is a must read and so funny you won’t be able to contain yourself! My husband chose that moment to walk into the room and say, “are you talking about the book I wouldn’t let you read at night?” Yes, he banned me from reading it in the bedroom because I’d wake him up snorting.:)

    Like

    LeAnnWoo recently posted Dumb Ways to Die.

  725. I love your book, and read most of it to my husband, because he couldn’t figure out why I was laughing myself to tears.

    And geek of the week cards? Just cool.

    Like

  726. These cards are fabulous. As are you!

    Like

  727. Oh I’d love a bookmark!

    Like

  728. 731
    Catherine Williams

    Love the book; love your blog. You make me laugh on days when I want to cry. Thanks for being you!

    Like

  729. Pick me! Pick me! I love those cards!

    Also, I read the ebook on my Kindle…wondering if you can sell just the new chapter on Amazon? I would totally buy it.

    Like

  730. I love your book! I love your blog! You are awesome!

    Like

  731. Weeeee! Those trading cards are soooo cooool!

    Like

  732. SWEET! I can’t wait for your next book!

    Like

  733. I had no idea such cards existed, but now I must have them.:-)

    Like

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  734. I love bookmarks! You should come to north Florida on your book tour, if nothing else then for the people watching. We’ve got some good ones down here in the redneck riviera!:)

    Like

  735. After receiving my signed book sticker when the hardback came out, I can hardly miss the opportunity to see you in person AND own another copy of the book! Looking forward to seeing you in St. Louis!!

    Like

  736. 739
    Pat F from MA

    Oh, I love you. Can I have a bookmark please?

    Like

  737. I’m bent out of shape that you will be on tour near me when I’m going to be away having dental work done in a 3rd world country (you only think I’m joking).

    Like

  738. Please send a bookmark to me. I love to read and I find you entertaining. Not as in, I like watching you eat paste entertaining but kind of.

    Like

  739. I’m going to have to buy two copies. The friend I’d loan it to never returns my books. You make my day every time I stop by to read. Thanks!

    Like

  740. My hubby ordered me your paperback as a “late” valentines day gift. can’t wait to read it!! each time you post, it’s like christmas! but with dead animals under the tree…

    Like

  741. Whyyyyyy do I live so far from these tour stops?!
    I love those cards. Yep.

    Like

  742. I shall then be the owner of two hardcover and one paperback editions, therefore insuring that there is always a copy ready to lend to my fucked up friends when they need it. Huzzah!

    Like

  743. I read the hard cover version. I meant to review it for my blog but recently realized that I never got around to it. Of course, it’s been a few months since I read it which means I need to read it again before I can write up a review. (Just to get some details right… I don’t need to reread it to remember that it was hilarious and I loved every page.) Meanwhile, I’ve been trying to convince my wife to read it. (READ: Endlessly annoying her by fixating on her reading your book.) So far I’ve been unsuccessful. Partly because she’s fallen in love with e-Books on the Kindle or iPad and partly because I think my constant, annoying “You should read this” statements are making her not want to read it. I pledge to wear her down and get her to read it, though!

    Like

    TechyDad recently posted Asperger’s Syndrome Resources.

  744. Extra chapter?!?!? Yeeshkabittle!

    Like

  745. I’d love to win a trading card and will definitely be coming to see you on your book tour. Maybe twice if that doesn’t make me a stalker.

    Like

    stacie tamaki recently posted I felt like a kid in a candy shop.

  746. Who needs 3 copies of LPTNH? THIS GIRL. Just wish the paperback tour brought you to DC … oh, and hello signed Geek of the Week cards!

    CRASH

    Like

  747. How to the early adopters get a copy of the new chapter? Where is my reward, in other words?

    Like

  748. I’ve given this book to so many people, it was just great. Looking forward to reading the extra chapter.

    Like

  749. 752
    Crystal Cameron

    Love the cards! Love the book! Wish you were coming back to Seattle though! I missed you last time because I can’t read apparently. I read the dates and times wrong so I requested the wrong time off work. Go me.😛

    Like

  750. I got to meet you in NJ, wish I could meet you again this next time around, but I’ll be at work. I’m looking forward to your new chapter though! Thanks for all the laughs!

    Like

  751. I wish you were coming back to Denver but it’s ok:) I am buying the paperback just for the extra chapter:) thank you for making me smile, giggle and all around being happy:) love yourbblog posts and I recently got my friend and husband involved in reading too. Thank you:)

    Like

  752. Well, looks like I need to get the paperback copy for that extra chapter. One day they will make a gritty Breaking Bad-esque show about my addiction to your blog, and the side effects are weird dreams about squirrel corpse puppets and vaginas which sounds terrifying to those that haven’t read, but hillarious to us who have.

    Like

  753. 756
    TamaraPaints

    I will buy another and I will not leave it for someone else! I will keep it and love it forever. It can be my emergency back up copy that I can carry around in case of a bad day!

    Like

  754. 757
    LaurenDiggsIt

    Pick Me!!! Pick Me!!! I must get the new chapter in paperback…!!!

    Like

  755. I would love one of your cards!! And I love that you have the Jen Yates one from Cakewrecks displayed right below yours:-)

    Like

    Kelly recently posted Sooo..... Umm.... Happy New Year and some junk.....

  756. Your publisher is brilliant. I will have to purchase the paperback because I can’t stand missing out on the extra chapter. Now I will have your book in both hardback and paperback. Hell, I might as well download it on my Kindle too! Oh well. It’s a small price to pay for the amusement that it will bring.

    Like

  757. Ha! Guess what all of my friends are getting for Arbor Day, National Maritime Day, their birthdays, and Christmas! Spread the paperback love…wait, that sounds dirty.

    Like

  758. Loved the book, can’t wait to read the new chapter! ^^ I hope it will make it to Europe as well!

    Like

  759. Hi,
    By the way, I DO sell Birdfeeders. You can take a look at
    http://www.etsy.com/shop/LoganAvenueVintage?ref=si_shop
    Thanks.

    Like

  760. I love you and I love your book. I’ll probably buy the paperback, too. My husband read it on his trip to Ireland and said, “I can see why you like her…she’s inappropriate and says ‘vagina’ a lot.”

    Like

  761. Yeaaaahhhh – trading cards! brings be back to the late 80s…i would love em!

    Like

  762. love you and your book and your magnet on my fridge!!!

    Like

  763. Cool beans.

    Like

  764. I want to win please. And I really want your book tour to come closer to NW Iowa. I’ll settle for Omaha, NE. Kansas City is closer than your last tour, but come on, small towns in the Midwest need you! :) As a new library director, I quickly added your book to our collection because it rocks, and others need you. Not that I’ve been to west Texas, but I’m certain Iowa is similar. Please please please please please….

    Like

  765. ME! Memememememememeee!!! Pick ME!! You made me love you with Beyonce, and then the Sloth and Kangaroo stories. Hope you have some fun on your book tour.

    Like

  766. Trading cards?! That’s hilarious. I now want to make them of all of my friends, or maybe just the awesome ones. I preordered your book from Amazon and am anxiously awaiting its arrival…. :-)

    Like

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  767. OMG. You have your own trading card?? And to think I knew you when you were nothing but the PR Agent for the Blessed St. James Garfield. Well, I didn’t really know you. But I read your blog. And I tweeted at you. That passes as “knowing” these days, right? And St. James Garfield is blessed and that’s almost biblical and that adds a whole new dimension of “knowing” you which is probably best we don’t think about too much…

    Like

  768. The card is the perfect compliment to the book.:)

    Like

  769. I’ll definitely buy the paperback too! Can’t wait till you come to San Fran!!

    Like

  770. Please come back to Maryland!! I was so sad I missed your signing last time you were here. We can hide in the bathroom with wine slushies and dead animals. It will be fun!

    Like

  771. 774
    MoldaviteSofa

    Monday we buried my grandma in the freezing rain just days after a blizzard. It was the fastest graveside service on record, with one family member staying in the car to keep warm and off the ice. Grandma, who didn’t want to waste money, was in a simply pine/cloth covered casket and I couldn’t help but love the clear plastic cover she had on. It was like a giant old ladies rain bonnet.

    Afterwards the six of us went to the local diner for breakfast – where my Mom and Aunt agreed that Grandma wasn’t buried in the plot she paid for but this one was better and already dug so everyone wins.

    Like

  772. Ooh pick me, pick me! My kids always steal my bookmarks, usually when I’m at a really good part in a book — I think because they like to hear me scream when I can’t find my place again. This, at least, would give them something new to steal.

    Like

  773. I’m making my sister read your book before we come see you in Cincinnati!!

    Like

  774. I’m a geek-a-day kind of girl…I’m way to geeky for just a week…but would love a card anyway! I can use it while I sit in Barnes and Noble and read the extra chapter because I own the hardback edition already. And made my family read it as well. But I won’t be sharing the card with them. It will be all mine…..

    Like

    Kristin recently posted My Last Bella Article.

  775. I am very much hoping to buy one, and see you on your stop in Dayton Ohio! Woot!

    Like

  776. So excited that you’re coming to Louisville on this tour!!!

    Like

  777. Really hoping the Canadian version has the extra chapter…..waiting for it to be available, then purchasing as soon as possible!!! Love it!

    Like

  778. I loved your book and bought six more to give away as gifts. Although I don’t suffer from depression, I know so many who do and all of the people I sent your book to do deal with their own personal form of it. They’ve ALL gotten back to me and have all fallen in love with you as much as I have. You rock. Your book(s) rock. Your blog(s) rock. Thank you for rockin’ our world!!! Oh, and I’d LOVE one of your cards as a bookmark. :o)

    Like

  779. I’d love to win an autographed The Bloggess Geek a Week trading card! Today is the one year anniversary of my blog, “The Jousting Life”, so it would make a nice anniversary present from one very successful blogger to one aspiring blogger.

    Like

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  780. Just finished it and am already plotting who I can gift it to. My eldest daughter the foul mouthed, tatooed social worker is #1.

    Like

  781. A thing, a thing, a free thing! I need that, especially since it has your likeness! Loved the book, and even though I bought the hardcover sans extra chapter I don’t feel like I got the short straw. Also, regarding your post about random people un-following you on Twitter, my Twitter name gets me RANDOM messages from German bronies – written in German, which I do not speak – how cool/messed up is that!?!

    Like

  782. I would just like to say, you are amazing.

    Like

    Azsunyx recently posted Photo.

  783. 786
    Original julie

    Oh, yes, please, I would love a Bloggess geek a week card.

    Like

  784. Have you selected winners yet? Last time I won anything was in third grade – colouring contest. Worked my ass off. Borrowed markers from a classmate because they were fine felt tip and I couldn’t finish with the shit thick crayola ones I had. Bottom line – I won a sweet Care Bears binder. Care Bears picture was on the front. I didn’t win Lot of Heart’s binder or anything. That would have been awesome. On an unrelated note – I got my dog from the shelter and that was her birth name. We now call her Moo. Oh – I’m buying the paperback book. I got the first one on my iPad from the Kindle store. I want to dog ear corners and write in it with a pen and highlight it with a real highlighter. I hope I randomly win.

    Like

    Lisa recently posted Thinking about you..

  785. I never win anything. Things largely suck right now. I could use a pick-me-up.

    Like

  786. Holy shit! It took FOREVER to scroll to the end of the comments from my phone! As for the newest version of the book… Why WOULDN’T I want another copy for myself?? Lol

    Like

  787. Now I get to pay it forward, book style! I’m gonna get the paperback, read the shit out of that new chapter, and then leave it somewhere it can be useful, like soup shop where all the angsty teens get lunch, or the my gynecologist’s office. Thank you!!!

    Like

  788. omg, these geek-a-week cards are uh-mazing! The Penn & Teller is frighteningly accurate. And the Wil Wheaton leaves me speechless…

    Like

  789. Please pick me..I would love one of your cards!

    Like

  790. 793
    jessie hansen

    Wait, Writer/Doctor? When did that happen. Woah, I think I missed something. Damn it! Ooh, something shiny… what was I saying?

    Like

  791. 794
    Lady Macbeth

    I’m debating between Cincinnati (which I’ve finally learned how to spell properly) and Louisville (which I’ve always known how to pronounce properly). Of course, they don’t have to be mutually exclusive. Oh, and I have lots of books, so I could use MORE bookmarks.

    Feel free to make a side-trip to Lexington while you’re in the fine state of KY, so I don’t have to battle my anxiety to drive out of town. Here’s a fun fact: William Shatner lives just west of Lexington in a town called Versailles, and I’ve heard it rumored that he visits Joseph-Beth (the bookseller you will be visiting in Cincinnati) from time to time. No lie.

    Like

  792. Love your book!

    Like

  793. I’m contemplating coming to see you in either Dayton or Cincinnati, but why can’t you come to Columbus, too? Or should I just suck it up and drive the little bit, since you have already come so far?

    Hmm…this is weird.

    Like

  794. I absolutely love your book. I am contemplating on reading it again, so I don’t have to stop reading your thoughts… OR you could just make it easy on me and write another book:)

    Thank you again!

    Like

  795. Since I am positive that you have been desperately trying to figure out a way to gain my forgiveness for not coming to a city close to me, I suppose that I could consider accepting one of these cards as an apology. The pain has been great but I could forgive you and we could be besties again. Ok maybe we will never be besties but I can dream right?

    Like

  796. 799
    Leslie Gibson

    I can’t wait to read it! I am the odd sort of misfit who doesn’t like hardcover books as much as paperbacks, and I didn’t have a job until relatively recently. So now that THAT’S worked out, I can’t wait to buy it!

    Like

  797. I’ll take a card, not that I need it as most books I read are on my tablet.
    But hey I have your hardback book and got screwed out of the extra chapter so you owe me one, Right ?

    Love your style of BatShit Crazy.

    Like

  798. I loved your book and annoyed my husband by laughing out loud while I read it. First book I ever had to stop reading because I was laughing so hard I couldn’t read the words. Needless to say, I had to share. I bought the book for my best friend and convinced another friend to read it. She passed it onto her sister who struggles with depression, and it has done great things for her. I also managed to get my husband addicted to your blog! Thanks for just being you Jenny!

    Like

  799. I totally want one. Mabe it will help with my depression over no longer being able to use my standard username, danalynn227 due to MY NAME having a naughty word unit that is now block by a bunch of sites….wtf.

    Like

  800. 803
    Meghan Miller

    Those cards sound awesome. I read your book in ebook format and Me enjoyed it. Will to get it again to read the extra chapter. I saw beyonce Beyonce’s skinny Floridian sister the other day.

    Like

  801. 804
    Sarah MacRae

    You make laugh out loud so often,thank-you so much! I have shared your blog and book with many friends. Can’t wait to see your new book.

    Like

  802. I want a Bloggess trading card! HOw cool would that be! I do have your book btw. Read it. Loved it. Keep it safe on my Kindle.:)

    Like

  803. 806
    Emily Lykins

    I purchased the hardback three times for three different friends (almost bought a fourth but thought you might think I was stalking you), and I can’t wait to finally own my own copy. We plan on seeing you in Cincinnati and can’t wait!

    Like

  804. 807
    Nichole Thornton

    After reading it last month, I suggested that my book club read your book this month. I am looking forward to a lively and fun discussion:)

    Like

  805. Jenkins, you motherfucker is my favorite chapter (so far). We just had jumbo quail the other day for dinner. I was reading it at work laast week (during my lunch hour, of course!) and was weeping with laughter. I am pretty sure my male co owrkers just thought I was weeping. My sister got me reading your blog and was so excited your book was coming out. She died of cancer right before it was published and did not get to see it. So I bought it and am loving it. I needed the laughter. And the weeping. Thanks.

    Like

  806. OMG!!! I want! I want! I want! That way I can say I own a piece of a celebrity! Ok, a signature of a celebrity…unless you’d like to spit on the card as well? Oh and as a side note when ever I see a metal chicken I yell “Knock, Knock, Motherfucker!” Most people give me a smiling nod but others seem offended…go figure?

    Like

  807. Hell, ya! New purchasing to happen! So far, I’ve;

    -bought 3 hard copies of the book (one for me, one as a gift, and one to loan out…)
    -recommended the book as Christmas presents, one of which I know ACTUALLY. HAPPENED. I was THERE!
    -bought it as an ebook via Kindle. Or iBooks. Something. I just know I can read it in words on my iPad.
    -bought the audio book. (Hello, Victor? I’m going to be a large contributor towards Hailey’s higher education. You should be very, very nice to me.)

    Jenny, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for being you. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to share you with my mom, my sisters, and other assorted girlfriends (although, now that I’m thinking about it, I have a few guyfriends that would probably enjoy your book as well. Could you add a montage?). You make my heart happy.

    Like

  808. Oh please, oh please, come somewhere close to finger lakes area, NY? Please? we have lots of good wine!! And chocolates. And did I say wine???

    Like

    k. a. barnes recently posted U is for ....

  809. I bought the nook version of the book I wonder if I can buy a book twice on an e-reader or maybe just the extra chapter I will have to look into it or call and annoy the people at barns and noble which ever sounds more fun I’m thinking the phone call….

    Like

  810. I get to see you on March 19th and I’m so excited! I’m dragging my mom and sister with me! The 3 of us are taking the day of work and driving into Dayton. Which technically isn’t that far. But we’re making a day of it. And I figure there will be a huge line just to get into where the signing is. Really, we are leaving the night before, bringing my dad’s tent, and camping out in front of the store all night. Remind me to tell my mom and sister this plan somewhere around the 18th of March. (Most of this comment is true. Except the tent. I don’t do tents. It’ll be an open air, foam mattress with a down comforter. Or we’ll be leaving a few hours before the signing, in time to get dinner in Dayton and then go stalk the book store until 7 and then you from 7 on. Is it really stalking though if so many people will be there for the same purpose? I wish I knew what to have you sign. Your book seems too obvious. I mean it’s a book signing so clearly I need to bring a toilet seat or a metal chicken or an eggplant or something. Or a banana and a toothpick. But that won’t keep long. Unless I photograph it.)

    Like

    KMarrs recently posted Should You Read This.

  811. Love the book, cannot wait to read the extra chapter!

    Like

  812. 815
    BourbonStreetJester

    I remember when my Mom, whilst we were in a bookstore, ran off to the humour section and popped up with a copy of your book, insisting she had to read me a section. Which she did, quite loudly. It was the part about the pet raccoon latching onto your sister’s face. My mom and I giggled in a bookstore next to a bunch of overpriced purses holding a book with a mouse dressed as Hamlet on the front. Needless to say, I bought it.

    Like

  813. 816
    Kacie