BUY MY BIRDFEEDERS

YAY Paperback! I like the idea of leaving it for an unsuspecting…i mean the next person on the plane or train.

I love the book! I’m hoping to make it to the Kansas City book signing

Ooh, that would be an excellent bookmark!

I love your book!

I saw you on your “hardcover” tour in NJ. (With Rosie O’Donnell) I would love a bookmark!

Best bookmark ever. I’ve already re-purchased the paperback so that I can meet you in person at your signing. Yay!

I am super stoked about paperback. Paperback books don’t leave marks when my brother mocks me for reading paperback.

GET EXCITED.

I am just so excited you are coming to Cincinnati!!! I have the book on Kindle but will of course be buying the paperback version (extra chapter? Hells yeah!!)

The only question left is what sort of odd thing can I give to you when you’re here…

Yesssssss bookmark cards!! I bought my book way back when and have a signed bookplate, so these would add to my creepy Bloggess shrine.

I loved it! I read it on my Kindle and laughed so hard before going to sleep the bed would shake and my husband would eye me suspiciously. When I would try to explain what was so funny, it never translated quite right. Finally, he got around to it and then I was the one annoyed by the bed jiggling. Bet you never thought of your book as a bed jiggler! Thanks for your honest and funny writing. I see myself reading it again down the road and discovering new things that I can connect to.
Meg Griswold recently posted..Garden work

I’ve read the book and got others to read the book. Will even try to make it to one of your signings as I have reserved the paperback immediately upon knowing it will be released.

I bought the hardcover because I wanted an in-person one, but also bought the Kindle because sometimes I’m too lazy to hold open a book.
And sometimes because I needed a free hand to stop the pee from coming out.
Dangerous Lilly recently posted..Sex Blogger Education: Content Theft and DMCA Takedowns

Would love to have a signed trading card, to go with my signed hardcover.
Robin recently posted..Hi

Oh and PS, I am totally buying the paperback, even though I already own it the hardcover and the Kindle version, because I am a book hoarder.
Kari recently posted..I forgot I’m not supposed to be allowed in the kitchen

BWAHAHA! Love them all, but the Wil Wheton card’s aces! LOL!

Most definitely going to get the new book. Probably going to read the chapter, then leave it in a public bathroom for the enjoyment of others. Probably a target bathroom, because im afraid walmarts a bit too illiterate.

Also, you need to come to utah. I promise you wont go home a sister wife, unless youre into stuff like that.

NEEDING the cards. NEED.

I love this. I love your book. And I love that you have a Geek-of-the-Week card.

Hawt hawt, motherfucker.
Robin2go recently posted..Keeping a boy’s dream alive.

I just finished your book last night. Had to stay up till 1 am because there was just no good stopping point. Wish you could come up to Canada for your book tour, I’d love to meet you.
Lynnea L Taylor recently posted..Conversations with my Husband

Having your trading cards would help make up for the fact that my mom got rid of the Star Wars trading cards I had when I was a kid. I had a paper bag full of them in the garage! (And I ate all the gum even though it was disgusting.)
Observacious recently posted..List 31: People born in 1973

The only way this book gets better is if you are the bookmark. PICK MY NAME!!! I would love this. As much as I love you, even. xoxo

Damn you marketing type ppls for adding something new to the paperback! *giggles*

I <3 your card so hard! My Sonic hair dryer…

Also I give what's the birdfeeder? I could only think of rat race and the squirrel lady… I don't know why.

Miffed once again that somehow New Zealand has been omitted from your book tour itinerary. Something we said?

I could use your trading card as a bookmark for my Bible. Because you’re just like Mother Teresa, only better.

I might be that asshole who just reads the extra chapter in the bookstore. Ok, probably not. #probably

You’re kidding me! Those cards are awesome!!

By the way, I love the idea of leaving one somewhere for someone to find. Since I’m getting two new ones (I’m attending two book signings…) I may consider doing that. Or maybe I’ll give to someone I know. I don’t know. I have to think about it first.
Carol recently posted..Life is about the little things that make us happy, right?

My iPod on shuffle at a recent dinner party belting out your request for a Harry Potter lightning bolt scar on your v-jay-jay sandwiched between some Les Mis and some Barry Manilow? Priceless.

Winning would sorta start to make up for the fact that your book tour brought you nowhere near Dayton, OH. Sorta.

Your book is terrific – and my friend likes it too
Andrea Mulder-Slater recently posted..This can’t be good for tourism

You’re on a trading card. That’s too awesome!

I feel as if the Birdfeeders reference is some elaborate joke or play on words.. and I’m completely not in the know. I even Googled it, and all I got was a whole bunch of “keep squirrels out of your birdfeeders’ articles… Which got me thinking: Why do we choose to feed birds and not squirrels? Who came up with this idea? Are the squirrels not hungry in the winter as well? What did the squirrels ever do to us?

(Ha! It’s a really obscure reference to a Sifl & Olly episode. ~ Jenny)
Sarah recently posted..Prevention

It is really awesome that your book has been made available around the world. That’s quite an accomplishment. I’m probably going to buy the book… now. Or. One of these days. I’m going to buy it. Soon.
Sabrina recently posted..Like the rest of the entire world’s population, I caught the flu

I re-read your book anytime I need a laugh or reminder that no matter how crappy things are, they’re still funny as hell too. I’ve always been a misfit in my own mind, but never cared. Because I’m also a ROCKSTAR. Just like you, and just like everyone else.

I need to buy the paperback, so I have a book I can let my sisters and family borrow. Hubby and I are still re-reading random chapters from the hardcover edition. It’s the kind of book you just don’t tire off
If you send those cards all the way across the big pond, I hope to win one *crossing fingers like crazy*
Cara(Eli) recently posted..Cousin Jesper

In here for the Geek-a-Week trading cards! Loved your book – recommend it to every book club that asks for recs. Because- we owe it to ourselves to read the book!

A comment

The trading card is fabulous. I can’t love it more. Can’t wait to get the paperback version of the book, too!!
The Dose of Reality recently posted..Don’t Grill a Steak, Grill Your Man on Valentine’s Day!

This would categorized as, “Awesomesauce!” I hope I win!

Hmmm.

I’ll buy the paperback, but I’m annoyed with Anderson’s in Naperville (aka the “Chicago” signing).

I already have the hardcover and don’t want another copy. It’s even signed! And they don’t have the paperback for sale yet, so I can’t get a ticket to the reading. Wtf.

Apparently I can come and listen, but not say hi.

I may be approaching you in the parking lot to have you sign my paperback copy (once I get it). You’ve met me twice already (big red dress at Chicago public library in July), so that won’t be totally awkward, right?

(Find me in the parking lot. Not a problem. `Jenny)

I get all excited every time I go into my local book store in South Africa and see your books, I’m the weird chick trying to get a decent photo of them.
Trisha recently posted..Silent Scream

you know, i just lent out my hardcover, so i *could* tell the hubs i need the paperback….

If this is a repeat comment, I’m not really trying to stack the deck (HA, pun sort of intended) so that I win one of your trading cards but I wasn’t sure if my last comment posted and my computer is running really slow so it’s hard to see if I have a comment already so, to be on the safe side….

I would really love your trading card! I bought your book on Nook but the pictures were really hard to see so I’m glad I have a reason to buy it twice! You’re awesome… hope to see you in Phoenix.

I have hardcover version with your signature when you came to Portland Powells, kindle version, bought few for my parents and friends, and would love to have your softcover also. Pick me.. pick mee ….

There’s no way I’d hide one of those trading cards in a closed book! I’d display it prominently in my office!

My husband just asked me why it is that I have 3 copies of the book and the audio version and now need the paperback version. I told him because… he should go f’ himself. It’s so hard to keep these people in line.

Adding any more tour dates? I’d gladly come hear you scream ‘i have DIARRHEA’ again.

That’d never get old.

No, silly. None of this would have happened without YOU. And, um, if we take a picture with our hardback, or we live in Canada (as some of us might be soon), will you send us a PDF of the last chapter? I don’t want to have to shop lift again!!
Borg Blog recently posted..What AM I waiting for?

I just bought my second copy of your book, and will be buying a third when the paperback comes out. Even if only for the extra chapter. Your hilarious honesty in both your book and your blog help me get through my tough times with a little smile. My grandmother is in ICU as we speak and this is one of the hardest weeks, but I am finding comfort in re-reading about Beyoncé.

Thank you.

I am looking forward to when you come to Louisville.

I’m pretty sure I NEED the trading cards. And I have my fingers crossed that you add more tour dates, particularly near me!
Brandi recently posted..The post I never wanted to write

You know, I checked out your book from the library because I have a cheapskate living in my head saying “HOW DARE YOU SPEND MONEY ON THINGS!!!!!” (Hi, Mom!) and now I’m glad because I can buy this copy guilt free and with a free chapter on top

Your book IS amazing, and I remember reading it in a hotel on vacation and being glad I was in another city because I alternated sobbing my eyes out and laughing with clearly psychotic glee.

I forced my library to buy it for me. The cards are groovy!
Brook recently posted..Just Keep Paddling!

i cant wait!!

I can’t wait to read this additional chapter.

Everything about this makes me happy.

This is the highlight of my motivation for the day. I have expended all of my energy on you. Because you’re awesome!

The Bloggess card would make a great bookmark, or… I could add it to my Cards Against Humanity set! And perhaps the cards could figure out how to procreate and create little twisted, geeky, Bloggess/CAH offspring!

You know, I checked out your book from the library because I have a cheapskate living in my head saying “HOW DARE YOU SPEND MONEY ON THINGS!!!!!” (Hi, Mom!) and now I’m glad because I can buy this copy guilt free and with a free chapter on top

Your book IS amazing, and I remember reading it in a hotel on vacation and being glad I was in another city because I alternated sobbing my eyes out and laughing with clearly psychotic glee.

Also one of the reviews on Amazon has the like “am I chuckling at someone who may legitimately be insane?” And the answer is, of course, sure. But then, I’m pretty sure most of us here can be legitimately considered insane 56% of the time and really, that’s all that matters.

You’re welcome. And thank YOU. I’m hoping that if I hang out at enough of your book signings/readings, you’ll come have coffee or go for a nice walk with me. A girl can dream.
MILF Runner recently posted..Is oatmeal supposed to be stringy like this?

I must have those cards! And I already have my tickets for your KC visit!

I helped crowd fund these Geek a Week cards because you were going to be on one of them. I’d love to have a signed one!

Once I move to a place that actually has a bookstore, I will most definitely buy it. I guess I could just take a road trip and get it, but I really need a reason to move anyway.
Amanda recently posted..demons of the past

I love you! The cards are great! The book is great! You’re blog is awesome! I love exclamation points!

So, is this a real chapter, or one of those like one paragraph chapters that isn’t really a chapter, but just a pretend chapter? Honestly, I loved the first edition so much, that I wouldn’t mind buying another copy, even if it’s just an extra sentence. Anything that supports me getting more enjoyment is totally worth it.

I do have a real question… is the paperback edition with the extra chapter available as an ebook? I prefer reading on my Nook… so I’m just wondering if I need to get an actual physical copy or not. Of course, if I don’t have a hard copy, then I guess I wouldn’t need the bookmark… which I would like to have… hmmm.. problem solved!

Thanks Jenny, for using your amazing problem solving skills to clear that up for me!

I might just have to buy the paperback since I loaned my Hardcopy with the signed bookplate to my sister. AND I haven’t seen it in forever! I’ve been wanting to reread it again anyways… along with the 4 other books of mine she has.

so I totally already have the hardcover and the audio book and now I totally need to go get the paperback! please let there be the extra chapter in canada XD It’s the best pick-me-up book ever, you can’t help but laugh and feel like you aren’t alone in your weirdness <3

Will the Kindle Version be automatically updated to include the new chapter?

I totally bought the hardcover and IMMEDIATELY gave it to my BFF when she moved bc i knew she needed it and i loved it so much i would have no problem buying it again. The whole extra chapter in the paperback tells me it was the smart move! Can’t wait!

Just got my tix to KC stop of the tour…..cant wait…one of the very few books that make me laugh out loud !!!!

I’d totally buy your book again for the extra chapter!

I need these. For real.

Jenny Lawson, you are my hero! I can’t wait to meet you!

Loved the book and waiting for your next!

Can’t wait to meet you in St Louis. Your, the book (I will keep this and give my other copies away ) and DRINKS. What a great Friday night

I would love one! Also for you to tour Texas. And don’y worry there are plenty of people who will just have to know what’s in the extra chapter like me. So I will end up with two copies of your book.

Bought the hard cover for a flight to California from Boston. Sat next to a sweet older lady who was super chatty… until I pulled out the book and she saw what was on the front cover. Conveniently, she was sitting on my left, so for the entire flight, she got to admire Hamlet von Schnitzel in all his glory. She didn’t say a word to me for the rest of the flight.

She clearly thought I was crazy. She doesn’t know what she’s missing.

Dear Jenny’s publisher,

Please make the bonus chapter available for purchase separately for Kindle and whatnot. My husband already thinks I’m crazy because I bought the hardcover, Kindle, and audio editions … he might leave me if I told him I was buying the paperback. I would absolutely pay .99, 1.99, 2.99, even 3.99 for a digital copy of the bonus chapter that I could hide on my Kindle

I’ve already given two copies of your book to friends; I’m happy to keep spreading the joy!

Because the hardback was awesome and a paper back with an extra chapter is sweet action! Now, I would love some signed trading cards” oh! And a pony.

The book was hilarious! Canada is not that far away eh?

Excited to buy and send this to my mom, who also battles depression. She’s in need of some good laughs Thanks for your hilarious stories and for helping those of us without depression understand it a bit more.

A NEW CHAPTER!? Good thing I am traveling to the USA in a few months so I can pick it up. But I plan to rip out the new chapter and keep it for myself. My fucked up friend can buy her OWN new chapter. xoxoxo
tabitha W recently posted..Financial Pants

Geek trading cards… look more interesting that all those sports trading cards I see.

Trying to gear myself up to come to your signing. Left Bank can get really crowded.

Love the trading cards, and can’t wait to see you in Paramus in March!

You can never have too many bookmarks!

Will there be a second second tour that brings you back to LA?

The cards look awesome!

I totally bought the book in hardcover, read it and then while I was re-reading it visited a friend that I decided needed to read it, so I gave her my copy and went and bought another one so I could finish re-reading it, but the paperback has a new chapter…. I might have to buy a third copy.
Brittny recently posted..Monday and a new crock pot recipe

I love reading your blog and your book. I suffer from depression and severe anxiety too, and when I read your blog it shows me that it is possible to get through. Thank you for being such a wonderful role model. I am still on the look out for a giant metal chicken with which to traumatize my bf

So that may mean I end up buying 30 or 40 copies. Can I get a volume discount?

OK. I am a sailor– really. All good sailboats have TONS of book shelves. While mine is a work in progress (check out my blog: http://www.svoctopussy.com), I would love to have some geek-a-week trading cards to use as bookmarks in all of my books. Including yours.

And just think of the entertainment value… I mean, on a sailboat we don’t get cable (although we do get Netflix — and with it, access to the first several seasons of Dr. Who!)

And, anyone who can make references to Sylvia Plath in a post about taxidermied shit rocks!

Send me some of your cards! Don’t make me beg (although I am not above that).

Cheers,
Octopussy
S/V Octopussy
Octopussy recently posted..Carpe Diem

Missed you the last time you were in NYC. I won’t screw up this time. Knock ‘em dead.

My mom and sister have read your book because of me influencing them. :] I wish you were coming back to Colorado, so I could go see you again (I saw you when you were in Denver in August. It was the day I broke my foot. I will remember it for two reasons).
Robyn Webb recently posted..In Case You Were Wondering, My Foot is Still Being a Jerk

I will miss being at the kansas city signing by 12 hours. American airlines refused to delay my flight for you. Said you were not famous like Beoncye…i so disagree

Want trading cards.

I love the hardback and actually left it sitting on a bench in hopes that someone will get to enjoy it as I’m buying the paper back (I want the new chapter all to myself). Xoxoxo luna

Definitely gotta to buy the paperback, too! Thanks again for being so amazing Jenny.

Omg you’re coming to Louisville! Yay! Yay! Ok i’m done now. I’m easily excited these days!
Stephanie H recently posted..One year later…

Well, you know how to get my inner geek all excited, now…
Claire J recently posted..Rejections & Restlessness

I’m so happy you’re coming back to Arizona!!! Plus the cards are totally rad!

My baseball team all got our own (very nerdy) trading cards when I was 10. I’ll trade you cards.

I second the forgiveness for no-Philly sentiment.

Looking forward to your visit to Ancient Rome!!

Wow, trading cards. I can only dream of being the subject of my own set of trading cards.
Steph@livingbrilliant recently posted..Feel the love

Eee! I’m waiting to buy it until your book signing though!
Jordan recently posted..SOTD – 01.24.13

Jenny,

I listen to my books vs reading them. Are they going to release the extra chapter in Audio? Loved hearing your voice each day on my commute (1 hour one way….) You just made that hour seem to fly by….. Or maybe it was because I do drive a little beyond the posted speed limit….. just a little.

i don’t have any fucked up friends. i’m the most fucked up of all. can you email me the extra chapter?
Simone recently posted..Does a title entitle you to act like a chump?

Congratulations on your success with the book. It’s great and it’s nice to see someone deserving getting the attention and praise. Love to read your blog… always makes me laugh (usually out loud at the most inappropriate times, which are the best times).

So want a trading card!! And will see you in April in San Jose!! SO. EXCITED. (and so is Fred, our rainbow-coloured caterpillar who you met in SF last year. i think it was the highlight of his year.)

I already have the hard copy but I know several people who need your book in their life. I’m thinking awesome Easter gift since it’ll miss valentines day. The trading card does make the perfect bookmark.

Ha! I’ll buy the paperback just for the new chapter and then give the Hardback to random people. Basically the same thing I’m already doing right now anyway.
But: I think you should definitely send me one of the trading cards. Not for me. For my shrink. Who’s awesome! She ordered Beyonce in the Spring of LAST YEAR and still hasn’t gotten her/it. So I think she deserves a card. If I knew her address you could send it to her directly. She’d be thrilled. It’s a poor substitute for Beyonce but since I doubt you’d sign and ship her… a card might do.
Think about it! I heard her recommend your book to another patient recently. She’s totally your anonymous PR person! And she needs some fairy dust! She was jealous of mine
Greetings from the South!

Ooh ooh ooh! Trading Cards! Can’t wait to see you in Phoenix again! And this trip should be haboob free for you.

If only they made trading cards for dorks, I would have a shot.

Come to Philly, darling. The City of Brotherly Love wants you!

If the new chapter is included in the UK version I’m going to go to Waterstones and read the new chapter. I can’t afford to buy it all over again, sorry.

Thanks for including me in your giveaway, Jenny!

For those of you who are new to Geek A Week, the cards are unfortunately no longer in stock at ThinkGeek, but I do have a VERY LIMITED number available at my online store. PS: The Bloggess is in Season 4. https://peraltartsy.myshopify.com/collections/geek-a-week

Congratulations on the success of your book. I pre-ordered the paperback just to read the new chapter. My husband is going to wonder why I need to order the same book twice, but hey…at least it’s not towels!

Love you, love the book, and I cannot tell you how often we refer back to Beyonce … the chicken of course not the singer…. Thanks for being you Jenny! Oh and I would seriously love if picked me for a book mark of awesomeness card.

Oh my goodness – is that a Sonic Hairdryer? And don’t thank us. None of this would have happened without you.
daniel recently posted..Comment on Off The Lawn by Daniel monk Pelfrey

I would LOVE one of them. So looking forward to buying a copy in paperback, I just couldn’t afford the hard cover… But my library ordered it in on my request
LatteJunkie (@LatteJunkieNZ) recently posted..21 things to know at 21

Your book sits on the bookshelves with all of the other literary classics. You have encouraged our family to talk about things we wouldn’t have, before reading your book! Keep calm in this crazy world and carry on! Very cool cards, we need bookmarks – please send!

I recommend this to my “crazy” friends as a reward and incentive. Best book ever.

I’d love to get the paperback and read the new chapter, but I may not be able to afford it. Maybe I’ll buy it, read the new chapter, and donate it to the library. Justification is a beautiful thing : )

None in the Austin area (yet)? Guess I’ll just have to settle for a 1-in-200-something-chance at a trading card.
Kelley Metzger recently posted..Pin it and Do it! February Edition

Please add Boston, MA to your book tour =) Also, I love your writing. It makes me laugh out loud and love that not everyone feels the need to pretend to be perfect, or cover up their real feelings.

I would LOVE a trading card. And I can’t wait to see you in Dayton. I can point you toward the best bathrooms and therapists around the bookstore if necessary! Hugs from a fellow anxiety sufferer!

I’ll be buying the paperback! My hard cover sits in it’s special place on the shelf so that your signature doesn’t get tainted by my husband or kids so the paperback will give me opportunity to dog ear the pages like I want to (since my reading copy of the hardback, which I stole from my best friend, was absconded with by my sister, who is now a fan) Stay awesome!!!!

Paperback, awesome! I hope the extra chapter and you make it to Canada sometime soon, eh!

excellent! i am too cheap for hardback.

Is the extra chapter the same as the one on the audio book? Because that was awesome!

Ooh ooh! Want. Trading. Cards. So. Excited.

My sister is raving about your book. She just gave it to my mom, and I plan on reading it too. Might have to buy the paperback book since I’m into travelling and will need light (literally) copies of books to amuse me!
Cat recently posted..Australia & New Zealand

I love your trading card! Winning one would be awesome.

I am so going to have to buy the paperback as a gift for someone, just so I can read the extra chapter. Fortunately, I know several people who desperately need a copy.

It is such a great book, I recommend it to everyone I know. And if they don’t buy they may get it as a Birthday, Christmas, Anniversary, Valentine, St. Patrick’s Day, ect. Gifts.

Very excited for the paperback version

I really think you need to start renting out Beyonce…I would love to have a giant metal chicken on my porch to greet my husband one day! Oh and I’d like to win something…maybe a pony

MMMMMMMMM .. extra chapter. I can almost taste the zombie taxidermic goodness.

I have your book on hold at the library, I can’t wait to read it!

Tayet, age 14
Tayet recently posted..My Camera(s)

Love you, Jenny! Come to Atlanta sometime!

Could you please give us (or sell us) Canadians a copy of the new chapter. Maybe as an e-book. Assuming we don’t get it in the paperback version that is. I bought one of my best friends your book as her Christmas present. Love you lots.

I would love to use you as a bookmark! I would also love it if you could come to Vancouver, BC! Congrats on all your success and thank you for letting us weirdos feel good about letting it all hang out.

I am currently scheming to attend the Louisville reading since 2 hours is not too far to drive to bask in your awesomeness. I mean Indy is just up the road, and it’s a bigger market and we totally love you here and you could have just as easily come here but it’s not like I’m bitter or anything

Oh, I would like a Geek card!

Will there be an ebook? And I really think you should visit Franklin, TN. That would be a wonderful excuse for a date night for my husband and me.

Let me just first say, I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy you’re finally coming to San Jose! It’s in my calendar, and I’m counting down the days. But now I have to decide, do I just take the hardback to have you sign (which already has the signed nameplate), or buy the paperback, which has the bonus of an extra chapter, but not the durability of a hardback. Decisions, decisions…

You best give those to me. I finally moved your book into my cart and the price had gone up! And it doesn’t even have the extra chapter! I cried for days.

Ooooh! Me! Meeeeeeee! *waves hand wildly in the air*

I will need to get the paperback for the extra chapter BF didn’t understand why I was both laughing hysterically and crying while reading your book – would love to get a Geek a Week bookmark.

Thanks Jenny!

Can I just say thank you so much for writing this book. I have the hardcover and give it to everyone to read. You have made me laugh to tears. And there are too many things I see that remind me of you or I think are effed up enough that you’ll like. Keep more coming!!!

I’m newly unemployed, so I can’t afford to get another copy at the moment. :-/ I have the e-book, but eventually want to get a hard copy. I love your book so much. My boyfriend and I quote it to each other all the time. Having the Geek-A-Week card as a bookmark for my eventual hardcopy, would be icing on the cake.

Can’t wait until you come to Cincinnati! My sister and I are stoked! I would love a trading card, because then it could mingle with my Doctor Who Trading cards, which I just happened upon in a book store like a month ago… I was EXTREMELY excited!
MichelleG recently posted..Mistakes were made, good quote

I will see you in Chicago!

Will my kindle update? I will totally re-buy if needed, but just wanted to check! Thanks for being you and making me laugh all the freaking time!! I would love a geek card that I could proudly display!

Ooh! Will the extra special chapter be in the kindle edition?
Love your blog… do you get tired of hearing that? I’ll be sitting at my desk reading it and a guffaw will suddenly explode from me. But it’s okay… they already think I’m nuts here.

LOVELOVELOVE the book. Giggled myself silly over “CHALUPA!”
Loaned it to my fiance. He finished (and loved) it and have now loaned it to my sister. I may have to buy the paperback so that I have a copy!
Would love some Bloggess cards, but that’s not the important part. The important part is that you are wonderful and your book should be read by everyone!

I can’t wait! I’m driving from Iowa to KC, MO to see you!

Paperback is pretty great, but I have the Kindle version so I can laugh like a maniac wherever I choose! Your book is beyond amazing!
Nickie recently posted..Blogger Tag Game

Wish you were coming out to the Pacific Northwest for your book tour! Congrats for coming out in paperback!

I’m buying the paperback for my 15 year old daughter so she can share it with all of her friends and learn of the dangers of teen putting your arm up a cow’s vagina. You’re like an After School Special. So yes please on the trading card, though I’m not sure whether it’s for me or her. Does my answer affect my ability to get a card? Because that, whatever it is.

Can’t wait to meet you in NYC!
Maya recently posted..Once More, With Feeling

Groovy.

Hoping to get out to see you when you’re in Chi-town.

I’m gonna drive my pregnant ass an hour and a half to see you! By the way, I hope its okay with you if I have a baby in the library.

Your book makes me frapjous. You’re the bee’s stinger.
Maggie recently posted..clash of the brightens (pink and red)

YAY! Geek a week! YAY! Paperback! YAY! Extra chapter!

I ever win anything and I don’t expect to for whining about but I wanted to comment… mostly I think you are awesome and I try to tell everyone I know about you…
Annette recently posted..Does anyone really know how to be single???

I have an amazon gift card I’ve been holding on to since Christmas JUST for this. Yay!!!

Do Geek-A-Week cards make my day? Yes, they do! Totally awesome.

I’d love cards, and more importantly I am looking forward to seeing you read in San Jose!

Ooo, me! I’ve bought two hardcover, the audiobook… *might* resist the paperback, we’ll see…

Well, this time your signing in NYC is close enough for my son to walk as opposed to the long bus trip he undertook last time. I have sent him the schedule and since it’s near my birthday I think he will show up. I suggested he take some of his women friends this time so he doesn’t stick out like a sore thumb.
Thanks for all the fun.

You don’t have to put me in the drawing, I’m just disappointed that I am not able to get the bonus chapter because I bought the hardcover.

I’ve only just started reading ‘Let’s Pretend…] (I received the hardcover for Christmas), and every time I giggle my husband wants to know what’s so funny, so I have to go back and read it to him out loud. Reading this way will probably mean it will take me twice as long as normal to get through your book, since I have to read it twice. Once to myself, and once out loud to my husband. Cheers.

Tried to leave comment earlier, but the internets hate me… I want the new chapter! (And a signed card would be awesome too!)

Me! Me me me! I would love a signed something I can use as a bookmark! (either that or I was just warming up for a solo or some sort)

I love that Augusten Burroughs’ review is on the cover saying he read & enjoyed your book! It’s even better because you’re right next to him on my bookshelf… by you I mean your book and by him I mean 4 of his books.
KatPerez recently posted..Twitter has ruined me!

I LOVED the book, which I have for my kindle. Will have to get the paperback. Hope i win the trading cards!

You’re not staying local for your tour? I might stalk you for real.
Hip-Baby Mama recently posted..Caution: Writer At Work

The extra chapter is it the same as what you had in the Audible addition? That was good stuff!
Corey Feldman recently posted..The Sexton and the Reaper – Available at Amazon

Yeah – totally on board with the paperback copy! I “loaned” my hardback copy to a friend back in the summer (she was fighting breast cancer and I thought – hey – what better way to pass the time while you are tripping out on morphine than to read Jenny Lawson? You’ll be able to look back on it and think: “Wow. Did that really happen….or was I just that delusional?” heh heh) Anyway – Haven’t gotten the hardcopy back yet – I think it’s on a permanent loan. Maybe I can distract her with a paperback copy while I make a daring escape with the Hardback.

I will definitely be ordering my copy! Wish you would come to Mitzi’s in Rapid City, SD.
Melissa Lawler recently posted..I DO Believe in Fairies!

I bought the hardcover & audiobook for myself & pre-ordered the paperback for a friend’s birthday! So if I find one on a plane, I’m gonna be pissed.

oh! are the geek a week cards tradeable??

I read your book. I loved your book. I made my husband read your book. He loved your book. I see your card. I would love to love your card. Pick me!

I’m hoping to come see you on tour … I just have to find someone willing to go on a ten hour road trip … Which I’ve now done. So all that is left is getting over my anxiety … I hope to make it!

I’m really looking forward to reading your book. I just recently discovered your blog and it really helped me just be more honest with who I am and not to be ashamed of things I had no control over. Just opening up on my blog has allowed others to open up to me. Turns out, I’m not alone! So thanks.
Jackie recently posted..January is for Feta Loving: recap edition

So we can all be misplaced misfits together. I would love a new set of bookmarks. My Costco receipt is getting a little dog-eared.

Kudos on going paperback!

I bought the e-book for my Kindle and a hardcover copy for my best friend as a birthday gift because I knew she’d love it (she did!) and now I have to buy the paperback Unicorn Success Club FTW!

Why do I always have to leave a comment? Can’t I just take one instead? New rule: if you leave a comment, take one with you to keep from disrupting the delicate balance. I’m gonna take comment #308 because: SASQUATCH! PS: I don’t get the obscure reference, but I have a feeling I’m not the only one who doesn’t understand how your mind works.
Jenbug recently posted..This one time, in New Orleans…

I got it when it first came out, but heck, another copy would be just dandy. can’t wait!

Imma buy the paperback and come to the reading in Portland that will be added to the tour. Obvi. Imma buy it in any format it comes out in. I’m pulling for a graphic novel next time.
Joules recently posted..Trifextra 53: Where the Wild Things Are

I love this book! I can’t wait for the paperback to come out so I can get copies for my friends. If we can’t be friends with you in real life, then we want to pretend we’re friends through the book. I promise we’re not scary stalker types; we just love you.

Oh bookmarks…I love bookmarks…

I kind of hope they make the extra chapter available on e-readers or something. My bookshelves are full to the gills – including the hardcover of your book. *sigh* Plus rumor has it you have another coming out sometime…

Well I never win, but I’m buying your book. Happy, happy, happy.
Momma Fargo recently posted..You Iz Kind

Perhaps my e-book will magically update with the extra chapter.
Perhaps Girl Scout Cookies will magically remove 50 pounds from my wasteline over night.

Pretty sure I’ll be a two book owner. And it feels a little stalker-y, so I’ll probably give one of them to someone less fortunate. Like my HR director.

I’m familiar with about a third of the geeks on the cards. Not bad, but I could definitely use some extra education!

I am looking forward to buying the paperback!! Hope the Canadian version has the extras!!

Awesome cards! Looking forward to reading the paperback : D. I’ve discovered that for my health and well-being it’s best to read your book in bed surrounded by pillows, with no food or drink to choke or drown on. This is especially true of the audio book.

Heck, I’ve only bought three copies of your book (for gifts, not all for me cuz that would be weird). What’s one more?
Karen Peterson recently posted..Sometimes, in Order to Move Forward, You Have to Look Back

I’m so sad that you’re coming to KC and I live so far away, Would ever consider coming to Hurley, MO, which has nothing of any interest in it since the mill burned down, the two cafes and the feed store closed? I could meet you at the bottom of our driveway, give you big hugs, and send you on down the road to places where there are actually things besides meth addicts, churches and humping dogs. That seems fair, I think.
Allison recently posted..Milestones

Thank YOU!

Oh Precious Roy…

I saw a preview for the show ‘Immortalized’ and immediately thought of you. It’s new to AMC, you should check it out.

Pick me!

Geek-a-week cards….Yes please
I’m not trying to sway your decision here or anything but so far I have bought 3 copies of your book (sadly none with the extra chapter, we are way behind the times here in New Zealand so probably won’t get it for ages) and have another copy to buy for a birthday present.

That would be such an awesome bookmark to use in my copy of the book!

As a purchaser of the hardback book, I was trying to think of creative ways to put the paperback to use once I’ve read the new chapter. My initials thoughts were: a bird’s nest, a handheld fan, a really unlevel table leveler, a one-time use mop? Then I decided to Google it and realized that I am really not creative. But whoever this is is:
http://www.thenester.com/2011/09/20-ways-to-decorate-with-book-pages-and-other-things-about-the-book-party.html
Tarl recently posted..My So Called Childhood: Vagina Burn

Oooo, oooo, I need one of those cards! And the paperback works out great since I gave my copy to my aunt for Christmas. Then, if you reissue a hardback with the extra chapter,I will get that one as back up for the paperback. And naturally, I will need the audio book for driving.

I think you should persuade the publisher that you have to personal visit Canada on the account of missing chapter. C’mon, what could be more conducive for book sales than retelling it live?

I never win anything, so I figure what’s the harm in giving this a try?

Love the book!

Yes! I’m pre-ordering several copies to give out as gifts. That way I don’t have to worry about getting my copy back when I lend it out

And those cards are beyond awesome.

I <3 trading cards!

I would just die for these cards. I’d be the epitome of cool. Cooler than cool. UUBER cool!!
uniqueweirdness recently posted..I’m Sorry, You Have the Wrong Number

Sign me up for those bookmarks!

So, i bought the hard cover and loved it, but i think i am just going to go in the store and read the last chapter there. Win Win.

Heather

I’d adore one of your geek-a-week cards…but I have to ask if Wil Wheaton has one in that deck?

A new chapter?!?! That’s totally worth buying it again And hopefully a geek-a-week trading card

Ooooh yes! I want one! PLEEEEEEEASE!! Plus, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for coming to Cincinnati!!! Really, anywhere in Ohio — I would have traveled! I can’t wait to see you!!! And a bonus chapter, too??? YAY!!

Huh…too broke to buy the paperback but I may cheat and read the extra chapter in the bookstore! Still loving my hardback copy!

I would love a Geek-a-Week trading card. Thankyouverymuch.

Just a note to let you know that your blog brings me joy and a lot of laughs (and I follow you on twitter – so keep on tweeting!). You seem to be a crazy amazing person; you have a great attitude. Thank you. I haven’t read the book yet, but maybe I will now that it’s in paperback.

Pick me! Pick me!
I’ve read your book, book clubbed your book, and read passages aloud to my husband and son so many times that they no longer cringe at the word vagina. Everybody wins. Love you. Thanks for your book and even more for your blog!

I already have tickets to see you in St Louis!

pick me please! I’ll even give your book as birthday presents for the next year!!! (not that i havent been doing that already…)

Geek-a-Week trading cards? Why have I never heard of these?
Kelly and Geoff recently posted..How to know when you’ve been watching too much Downton Abbey

I’m sad you’re not touring near my town, but I can’t wait for the paperback version of your book! I had to check the hardback version out of the library and then circulate it around my family and friends. It was overdue, but my mom had to reread some of the earlier chapters. Apparently, they were ‘a lot like back home’. Looking at my grandparents in a whole new way…
Beth Damiano recently posted..On Non-Homemade Cookies

Love the trading cards – coming to see you at the book signing in STL!

I can’t wait to see you in Chicago!!!!! Eek!

Looking forward to picking up the softcover and its extra chapter of goodness.

Trading cards you say?!?! Sign me up. I used to love to throw playing cards and hockey cards at the cats. Now, the munchkin is about to become the age where that will be fun for her too. They cats will love it as well. Woohoo!!!
Smokeynall recently posted..The First Goalie Post.

Show Seattle some love!!! Head this way on your tour (or at least throw a set of Geek-a-Week up this way maybe?!? No?!?!?)

Oh! Cards! And yay paperback! Will definitely have to pick that puppy up when it’s out.

Can I just buy the extra chapter, and attach it to my current copy like it was some kind of creature created by Frankenstein?

Holy pickles, those trading cards look amazing. If you’d like, I could bribe you with pictures and/or stories of my adorable, ‘special’ kitty.

You mean I spent more money and I’m getting screwed out of laughs? That’s f’d up!

Awesomesauce!!!

And you need to come closer to lower Alabama someday (pretty please with a taxidermied rodent on top)!

Those cards are seriously awesome! I will probably buy a paperback copy of your book even though I already have the hardback. I musts have that extra chapter!

Just LOVE YOU! I was given your book for Christmas and I have my teenage daughters reading it! They love it too! Every once in a while I will get a random text with a quote from your book Love it! Thanks for your story!

Ooooh…I already have a signed copy of your hardcover book, but…I probably need the paperback. Yep. Also, I need the sweet, sweet nerdy goodness of Geek-a-Week trading cards. They make me happy-laugh, as my husband says. So fantastic!

I love that you voiced the audiobook. You did a great job. Even though I had already read the hardback, hearing you read it made it so enjoyable. I can’t remember when I’ve laughed so hard. Can’t wait for the paperback with the bonus chapter. Would love the trading cards.

Why is the title of this post “Buy My Birdfeeders” and there is no mention of birdfeeders in the post?!?!?!?!?!?!?! But I like prizes! And birdfeeders.

Just so you know, I ordered the Kindle version and so I am going to shoplift the paperback just to read the new chapter. Or maybe I will just read it in the bookstore and then leave a dollar in the back of the book I read from as compensation to the person that actually buys the book I use. I think that’s fair!
Tina, Escrow Goddess recently posted..This just needed to be shared!

Can’t wait to read it!
Punky Coletta recently posted..Being an adult can suck, and it can be awesome. And sometimes the sucking part is what’s awesome (wink, wink, because I totally mean that in a dirty way.)

You have your own trading card? I did not know that.

You’ve probably heard, but just in case you haven’t, there is a new tv show starting this Thursday
(Feb. 14) about taxidermists!
Love your book; favorite part is the giant chicken at the front door.

Well, I’m bummed about the extra chapter – and bummed that you’re not coming to MI. Bummer.

Geek-a-Week? Hell yeah! I’m now glad that I haven’t gotten around to buying the book. Extra chapter! More Jenny!

Love the bookmarks…and as my family gets me the pretty bookmarks every Christmas from Barnes and Noble that are metal and potentially a lethal weapon (turn a corner to quick and they fly out of the book) this would be awesome…and as a side note my son shot is first deer this year…the head is still in the garage as we have made a family project out of trying to preserve it…

Oo love the cards!

Why in the fuck would you thank us?

You’re the one who wrote that fabulous mother fucker. We should all be thanking you. It’s one of the best books I’ve ever read.
Stephen Battey recently posted..This apple tree is raining cats.

Just yesterday I recommended this book to a friend! It’s funny every time. I’ll be getting the paperback just for that chapter. That was some evil planning there…..
Vanessa recently posted..And this is why we are together…

Geek-a-Week? Wow. Trading card nerdvana. Yessss!!!!

Stopped by Barnes & Noble and had them put an alert on my name so I’ll know when the paperback is in. I listened to the CD; it’s hard to drive when you’re out of breath from laughing. Just sayin’.

Bloggess trading cards? Wouldn’t trade mine for anything!

LOVE your book! I read it for book club…yeah I have a lot of effed-up friends, go figure. I also teach 8th grade, so your particular brand of effed-up humor is just what I need on a frequent basis. Oh, and I shared it with other middle school teachers, so today’s youth probably doesn’t stand a chance with us teaching them…
jan recently posted..My New Adventure

Oooh, awesome cards! Also, I bought your paperback in England and it totally hasn’t got any new chapters. Which you just said it wouldn’t have. But still. You know. No. Okay. Coffee?
Nat recently posted..How to tell someone that you bled vagina blood on their chair and also stabbed it with a pair of scissors. Twice.

I can’t wait to get your book!!! I’m glad I waited so now I can get the extra chapter.

Thanks for making my morning each day! I love your blog!

New chapter? Woo-hoo! Guess we can read it for our “book club discussion” AGAIN! (excuse to drink a lot of wine and leave the kids with the husbands) Spasms of laughter = abdominal training, right?

If I buy the paperback will you sign that AND my original hardback when you come to Ohio? I was reading your book on a plane and LOL several months ago- the woman next to me kept trying to move away from me. She must have been a humorless old Hun- I need depends when I read your blog and comments!!!

I am SO buying the paperback too. Now come to the Philly area on this book tour so I can get this one signed too!
Issa recently posted..Day 167 – NO, Don’t Go!

I bought the book on Kindle – and then was irritated at my Kindle (because it’s the cheap one) that I couldn’t see the pictures very well. So I DEFINITELY plan to buy the paperback. Probably multiple times so I can share you with my friends!
Gigi recently posted..Lincoln…and the drama of shower curtain liners

How have I never heard of Geek-of-the-Week when it has Peter Sagal, Cakewrecks, AND The Bloggess? WANT.
Jenny O recently posted..Glamorous Lilli Ann Coat Vintage 1960s Plus Size Champagne Mohair by StrangerBirdVintage

Thank you for the time you put in on this blog. It always makes me look at things a little differently, and it’s nice to get out of your own head from time-to-time.

I am amused that you’re thanking people who shoplifted your book. Also, I read the title of this post and initially thought it said “buy me birdfeeders” and I wondered why you wanted a ton of birdfeeders.

Definitely glad to find I’m not alone. For years I have said “I got on the wrong bus, and ended up on THIS planet. Now I seem to have misplaced my ticket.”
claire recently posted..Le Roi est mort

Jenny,
Every day I check your blog for updates…it’s seriously like the highlight of my day. (Your twitter feed rocks too) Everyone at work knows when I’m on thebloggess.com cause they can hear my laughing!

But seriously, Jenny….as a woman who has lived with anxiety and depression for the past 20 years, all I can do is say THANK YOU SO DAMNED MUCH for making me laugh when nothing else can.

Oh, pleeeeease pick me! I have been struggling with the most crippling depression lately, and could really benefit from *something* going my way.

Ooh… These would look good next to my Star Trek TNG and Dr. Who trading cards!
Can’t wait for the new chapter See you in Cali!

Your book made me laugh so hard, there were a few times I was worried there would be a pants-wetting incident. I’m glad to report I am still a fan and not incontinent! Crossing my fingers and toes that I get my hands on some trading cards.
Cathy Benavides recently posted..Fancy Dress Poll

Please come to St Augustine, Florida. Last time I made my friend drive from North to Atlanta to Buckhead. I was excited to get my book signed but jealous my friend met you and I didn’t

GEeeek me!

comment, comment, I love you, comment!

My 17 year old, chose the 1st chapter of your book for her Forensics Contest. She memorized it, performed it, and won 3rd place!
Shanna recently posted..laurennmcc:

“If you can’t afford to tip you can’t afford to eat…

I lent this book out to a co-worker ( I don’t lend out books! People abuse my babies!!) Your book made me cry from laughter so many times! Absolutely love it!!

We just moved from Cincinnati to Rochester, NY. Had I known that your book tour would stop in Dayton and Cincinnati, I probably wouldn’t have moved. Congratulations on the paperback edition! I can’t wait to pick up another copy.

I adore your website and loved reading your book. I actually bought a copy for a friend just so I would have someone to talk to about it. She loved it too!!

The best part of the website is that it helps me keep perspective on the icky crap going on and that sometimes that voice in our head lies to us. Unless it’s talking about chocolate, then it never lies

Since I already have three copies of your book: won a preview copy on Goodreads, bought the hardcover, and the audio book, I’m not sure if I’ll invest in the paperback. (I may just go to the bookstore and read the new chapter in the coffee shop. Don’t judge). Anyway, I’d still love to have a “Geek of the Week” trading card for a bookmark. I see you still haven’t added “Wolverine” to your tour schedule yet. Hope your publicist gets on that tout suite.

I already bought the book once, so I’ll just pirate the extra chapter…

…and by that, I mean talk my sister into buying herself a copy and steal a peek at the extra chapter. I’m not sure how pirates will be involved, but I’m not making any assumptions when it comes to you Jenny.

Loved your book! Read the ebook over Christmas Break & laughed so very hard! Looking forward to Bloggess trading cards. Thank God for your blog – I need something to keep me going until your next book comes out.

What the what???? You have trading cards? That is awesome! I already have tickets to come see you in Illinois! #10 and #11 watch out!

I loved your book and I plan on buying it in paperback. I just wish your tour was passing though my area.

Any chance book 2 will be out before next Christmas? Love your book(s) for the hard to shop for folks on my list.

So… I tried to see you iin Chicago last summer while I was visiting there but tickets were sold out.. So now, closer to home, I’ll get to Phoenix to see you.
Thanks for letting us all know that the best way to be successful is to be yourself!
LOVE YOU! (not in a creepy way, but a “you’re so great” way)
Sally recently posted..Mini Praline Custard Pie Recipe

I heard about your book when my best friend called me, in tears. She read one line from it to me, and I nearly fell out laughing. I was traveling across country, moving by myself, and I downloaded the audiobook at the next wifi hotspot. The entire drive we voice messaged each other “have you read this yet?” “did you get to this part?” “oh, holy hell… just wait until you meet Jenkins”. It made a long drive a whole lot more bearable. That was almost a year ago, and I’ve stalked friends and family with requests to buy your book. They are always glad they did!

Okay…I bought the hardcover-PREORDERED…then bought the Nook version…then bought the audio on itunes…if I win a card I promise to buy the paperback to complete my Bloggess collection and then we both win!
Joanna recently posted..Lesson learned

I pre-purchased the kindle edition and loved it, but I’m looking forward to reading the paperback because I’m really old fashioned and like holding books in my hands.

Thanks for writing it!

I was just going to get the book from work, but I may now have to buy it for the new chapter. I’d love the bookmarks. I collect them!

Oh holy shit. You replied to me in my comment. I’m squeeing. I think I just peed myself.

I’ll see you on March 7th, and it really can’t get any better. Get to see Jenny, then I get to go to Florida to see the Detroit Tigers in Spring Training. OMGOMGOMGOMG

I would like to have a Geek-a-week card! I bought your premium signed book ($125) and your regular retail priced book (and likely will get the paperback as well.) The reason the premium one was so expensive was because before I knew you were coming to NC, I had my cousin in San Antonio go to a bookstore where you were making an appearance and get a signed copy for me, which he then mailed. When I sent him the money for the book, I also included little gifts for each of his three children which meant I could not use a business sized envelope. So packaging became larger along with shipping costs, and I didn’t want him to think he was my own personal procurement center, so I threw in a little extra for his trouble and the cost of gas. Did you see how big San Antonio is? That’s a lot of driving, for which I was extremely grateful. Anyway, I was thrilled that I got a signed book in Charlotte AND you signed my Weasels Gone Wild picture for me. The Geek-a-Week card would be a nice accompaniment to my WGW picture. Hang in there on this tour. Do it for the Gipper. or the stripper. I’m not sure how that quote goes. Flipper?

Pick ME!!! Pick ME!!!! I just cannot WAIT till you are in San Francisco. Geek crush alert!!!! *not, NOT stalking* just sayin’…

I will be driving 3.5 hours to see you in Paramus, NJ on March 5. I can’t wait!!! You totally rock (and if you can add a few more stops, say Philly, Baltimore, or even Harrisburg, PA, that would rock even more.)

I am a perfect winner for “Geek of The Week” cause I have pink hair and I teach math to urban kids. What is real life geeker plain than that?

I can always use a bookmark!

I’ll also have to snag a copy of your book now that it’s in paperback!
Katy recently posted..January 26, 2013 – Red Rocks, Morrison Cemetery, Mt. Vernon Cemetery

Oooh, I would LOVE a geek-a-week card! How fun. Any chance you can stop off in San Diego again? I missed you on the last tour. Actually, maybe I’ll plan a trip to Phoenix…that way I can meet you AND avoid seeing the in-laws who are planning on being in SoCal at the same time…Genious!

I have the hardback but I will buy the paperback just for the extra chapter. Yeah, I’m that kind of fan.
Denise Malloy recently posted..When The Girls Go South

Pick me! I would love to win a Geek-a-Week trading card.

I could be your stalker of the week. Have your hardback version. Then my super cute roommate/husband asked me to put some crappy mystery audiobook on his ipod for long distance runs (as in “running”, not “the runs”). Instead, I downloaded your audiobook for a fun surprise for him. And you are totally “mysterious”, so I’m pretty sure I got the genre right. Now he likes to tell me stories about his “friend Jenny” when he gets back from his runs–which is nice that he likes you now since I bought him an 8 1/2 foot big metal chicken for our 15th anniversary last year and I think he had some pent up issues about that. Couldn’t find a 5-footer, so I had to settle. I added uplighting on the chicken, btw, and it looks amazing. The neighbors love me. Can’t wait to see you in KC…to complete the trifecta with the paperback version. Thanks for the laughs.

You owned the Doctor look, you are now forever immortalized as a female Doctor – Go Bloggess!

I have never seen these cards before in my life – they are so awesome! No wait, they are shoooo awshum! Love your writing and ability to create laughy, funny stuff. Please for writing a new book?

I’d just like to say : box falls out of the sky, man falls out of the box, man eats fish custard, and look at you, just sitting there!

No, THANK YOU for being the perfectly awesome person you are and for being a huge champion for those whose need it most!

I convinced my whole family to read your book. You are a great author, and incredibly funny!

Congrats! Love the trading card idea. I wonder if you would trade for my Wild Ride cards?
Put Denver on the list next time, or better yet, Boulder!

I would love to win the cards! Very cool.

Trading cards?! You’re so fancy!

I am almost through with the book. Love it. Laugh hysterically every time I pick it up, which I desperately need right now. Thanks for writing it and cheering me up! I am fixing to get laid off from my job.
Dee recently posted..Words of Wisdom from a Stranger

I recently found your blog and find you incredibly refreshing and entertaining!

Free stuff? Yes please!! Loved your book!!

I WANT THE CARDS. BAD. Please come to Denver. You might have heard that weird stuff happens to wild animals here, too. AKA the elk shot by texting police officers. You would fit right in.

I started reading your book while waiting in the airport security line. Within 5 minutes I was shaking so hard with suppressed laughter that I was worried I wouldn’t be allowed past the ID check.

Your book was the only thing I asked for the whole time leading up to Christmas. I didn’t even ask for a new vacuum after ours prettymuch blew up.. I just used my tiny stick vac that had also broken but continued to run after I used postage tape to reattach the chunk that fell off of the canister housing after sucking up a huge garden spider and then realizing he wasn’t coming out of there without a fight and cracking the plastic while frantically trying to flush him down the toilet. Needless to say, I received your book in hardback Christmas morning, read it in a day and a half, and would absolutely love one of your trading cards to use as a bookmark when I get the paperback for the bonus chapter. I passed your book on to my mom. She and I are from Tomball, TX and her cousin has a cat that had kittens with a possum. i just misspelled that, but I’ll try and find the picture to increase my chances of winning. Congrats on your book!

Yes, please. And thank you for being you. It’s good to have f*&ked up “role models” because life isn’t a hallmark movie and we are all a little insane now and again.

I’d use the signed card for good and give it to my best friend; the one person on earth who gets me and gets you.

Keep being awesome.

You need to add a stop in Little Rock, AR. We love the Bloggess!

I have my eye on the paperback… and I hope you come back to MN!

So excited for the soft cover! I got my hard cover signed by you when you came to Canada. I am hoping the extra chapter is in the Canadian version too. It would be even better if you come to Canada again so I can get my soft cover signed too!!

YOUR GEEK-A-WEEK CARD IS NEXT TO JEN FROM CAKE WRECKS GEEK-A-WEEK CARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BRAIN CANNOT HANDLE THAT MUCH AWESOMENESS, EVEN IN A PICTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darn you! Sounds like I’ll have to buy a paperback version of your book as well. But you make it impossible for me to hate you.

I’ve bought two hardcovers so far, got one signed, (remember me, best friend who saved your life? At least thats how I asked you to sign my book) and I’m sure I’ll buy a paperback. I might need professional help.

your book made me cackle out loud at my therapists office, she was terrible and I dumped her, so you win. or at least I think that’s how this works.

I should probably buy the paperback now that I’ve lent out my hard cover to all my no-good friends and it doesn’t look like I’ll be getting it back any time soon. The more the merrier!

Wow. You do realize you just did something most other authors haven’t done before. I mean, besides being awesome. You pulled a stunt like the entertainment industry does to sell more movies. Maybe your next book should only start with 5 chapters. You could drag it on FOREVER!

Seriously though, love it!

I still have the picture I got taken of you and me when you were in Portland on my phone, makes me happy when I see it! Good luck on your next tour and take care of yourself! We all love you!

SQUEEEEE!

I’ll take two dozen bird feeders. And a Bloggess trading card please.

I have the hardback and the audio, of COURSE I need the paper back to complete my set! The “bookmark” would top it all off perfectly.

Thank you, jenny. I missed you when you were in Portland due to social anxiety, i hope you come back so i can try again.

I bought the hardback book but I am still going to buy this one. Maybe one day you will make it to an area near me in central Florida or I will be closer to a place you are visiting and I can get you to sign them, in the bathroom of course. Thank you for letting all of know that we are not alone. Not only in mental illness but it pure awesome akwardness.

I’m new to your blog and am HOOKED! I just read all the way back through 2011. So sad I didn’t know about you earlier. Would you care to add a stop to Utah on your book tour?

Those cards are fantastic. I’d also like one for Cakewrecks, but I guess I’ll have to spam a different blog for that.

Oooh pick me, pick me!

The South African paperback version came with a prescription for antibiotics. So thanks, I guess?

Please pick me! Pick me!!!

Ooooh! Pick me! Yours is one of the few Geek-A-Week cards I don’t have yet.
Sharon recently posted..I’m using YNAB and I’m determined to succeed!

awe bummer no Upstate NY or PA signings happening yet… Meeting you in person is on my bucket list, so hopefully you do more signings in the future…

Glad your book is doing well… but really did you ever have any doubts? You are hilarious!!

HELP!!! I am yet to figure out how to get the book in India. Seriously….HELP!!!!
Shreya recently posted..Closer

YES! Paperback & extra chapter for less?!?! *pulls out wallet* So psyched you’re going to be in SF

You left off Syracuse (again)! It’s lovely here in the winter!

I feel like a pusher or could possibly be your pimp, for all the people I’ve shared your book with. Id never make you share your hoeing money with me like a pusher or pimp, but trading cards would be cool! Just saying…

oooooooo Geek-a-week cards!

Trading cards!! Want!!

Me, me, me! I have a signed hardback, but I sent a copy to my daughter and she NEEDS a signed bookmark When are these cards going to be available to us fans? PS: We are in the UK, if you are only mailing in the US then I will bow out gracefully…well, as gracefully as I do anything. BUT we still need those cards, soon xx

The hardback was fantastic, going to have to get the paperback too. The trading card would be like… Orgasmic.

I bought the book to read on my kindle. How about selling the extra chapter the same way?!

No need for the thanks – your book was fan-fucking-tastic! I’ll buy it again.

Having bought your book as a e-book, I guess this is an awesome way to insire I get a paper copy. Well played Bloggess! Well played.
Chris Dean recently posted..It Was A SAUSAGE!

I bought the book for my Kindle and am having buyers remorse. I want the new chapter! Wonder who needs a slightly used copy?

I bought the paperback-version (none other available) through amazon UK last year, and now feel totally cheated!
No pretty hardback to help stabilise my tables and no extra chapter – I was robbed, ROBBED I say!

And I need more bookmarks- my wife is tired of finding little snippets of newspaper everywhere in the house (ok, bathroom – where else do you get some free time to read in peace?) because they are:
A:small and available bookmarks
B:too small actually and fall out everywhere
C…and then I need another one
D:…and another one…It’s a vicious circle!

Geek a week would NOT be in the book. If you signed it, it would be framed. Because I am an obsessive weirdo like that!
Candice Franklin recently posted..Influenster Palmolive Fresh Infusions Challenge

Me. Me. Pick Me. I’ll loan you my crown.

I originally read on my kindle (and loved it) but now I can’t wait to buy the paperback!

No…..thank YOU. Thank you for writing your book, for writing your blog- for having the courage to show people that strange misfits are not only perfectly good people, but in fact are some of the best people out there. Thank you for being our Emperor of Weird. You rock, Miss Lawson.

Oh and even though I have the hardcover, I am SO buying the paperback because
A) I will not let other people read that extra chapter without me.
B) It says “New York Times Best Seller” on it and well, that is just awesome.
C) You got a freaking endorsement from Augusten Burroughs!! That is just way too much amazing for one book.

Is it unhealthy that I felt pangs of unbridled (only they were “bridled”? because I didn’t act on them. Mind you what would I have done really…) jealousy over the geek-a-week cards?

Is it wrong that I wanted desperately (only not actually desperate in the sense that I didn’t do anything about it – but only because I don’t know who to beg or offer blow-jobs to) to see my own character printed on one of those cards?

Is it sad that this is what my life has come to? Don’t answer the last one. Please.
Jennifer June recently posted..A 14 Year Old Trapped In The Body Of A 42 Year Old?

Holy crap! I want a geek a week card!

Also I’m super excited you’re finally coming to Kansas City and I can’t wait!

I hope I win! I want that Jen card too!! See you in Cincy!

Feeling a little cheated on the extra chapter. Is it cheating if I just read it at the bookstore without buying another copy??

Hey, so what about a tour up here in Cananda… Show some love to your fans up here… I promise we’d make it worth your while.

I get the giggles every time I think “Frankengyna”. It kinda pops into my head during pap tests, the Dr was like “what the F***”.

Yay! I can’t wait to read the extra chapter

I absolutely loved this book. I would be honoured to have a trading card. Sign me up

I love those cards! Pick me, pretty please?!?

I would really like some Geek cards. Please! Also, in your picture on your geek card, you sort of resemble Lilith from Cheers/Frasier. I think it might be the suit. I totally mean this as a compliment. Do I win? Is this a weird time to ask you about visiting Colorado on your tour?

I’m coming to see you when you’re in Chicago! I bought your hardcover, and now the paperback, and I’m considering bringing a Beyonce statue for you to sign…..and of course I need trading cards to use as a bookmark.

I promise not to leave any sleepy kittens on your table. Unless you want me to.

Who looks at a hair dryer and thinks, “Ooh, this could be a little more sonic?”

No, wait, actually that would be genius. Would it do my hair for me?

I love your book, and read most of it to my husband, because he couldn’t figure out why I was laughing myself to tears.

And geek of the week cards? Just cool.

Oh I’d love a bookmark!

Pick me! Pick me! I love those cards!

Also, I read the ebook on my Kindle…wondering if you can sell just the new chapter on Amazon? I would totally buy it.

Weeeee! Those trading cards are soooo cooool!

I had no idea such cards existed, but now I must have them.
Julie recently posted..Fish Fingers and Custard: A Timey Wimey Birthday

After receiving my signed book sticker when the hardback came out, I can hardly miss the opportunity to see you in person AND own another copy of the book! Looking forward to seeing you in St. Louis!!

I’m bent out of shape that you will be on tour near me when I’m going to be away having dental work done in a 3rd world country (you only think I’m joking).

I’m going to have to buy two copies. The friend I’d loan it to never returns my books. You make my day every time I stop by to read. Thanks!

Whyyyyyy do I live so far from these tour stops?!
I love those cards. Yep.

I read the hard cover version. I meant to review it for my blog but recently realized that I never got around to it. Of course, it’s been a few months since I read it which means I need to read it again before I can write up a review. (Just to get some details right… I don’t need to reread it to remember that it was hilarious and I loved every page.) Meanwhile, I’ve been trying to convince my wife to read it. (READ: Endlessly annoying her by fixating on her reading your book.) So far I’ve been unsuccessful. Partly because she’s fallen in love with e-Books on the Kindle or iPad and partly because I think my constant, annoying “You should read this” statements are making her not want to read it. I pledge to wear her down and get her to read it, though!
TechyDad recently posted..Asperger’s Syndrome Resources

I’d love to win a trading card and will definitely be coming to see you on your book tour. Maybe twice if that doesn’t make me a stalker.
stacie tamaki recently posted..I felt like a kid in a candy shop

How to the early adopters get a copy of the new chapter? Where is my reward, in other words?

Love the cards! Love the book! Wish you were coming back to Seattle though! I missed you last time because I can’t read apparently. I read the dates and times wrong so I requested the wrong time off work. Go me.

I wish you were coming back to Denver but it’s ok I am buying the paperback just for the extra chapter thank you for making me smile, giggle and all around being happy love yourbblog posts and I recently got my friend and husband involved in reading too. Thank you

I will buy another and I will not leave it for someone else! I will keep it and love it forever. It can be my emergency back up copy that I can carry around in case of a bad day!

I would love one of your cards!! And I love that you have the Jen Yates one from Cakewrecks displayed right below yours
Kelly recently posted..Sooo….. Umm…. Happy New Year and some junk….

Ha! Guess what all of my friends are getting for Arbor Day, National Maritime Day, their birthdays, and Christmas! Spread the paperback love…wait, that sounds dirty.

Hi,
By the way, I DO sell Birdfeeders. You can take a look at
http://www.etsy.com/shop/LoganAvenueVintage?ref=si_shop
Thanks.

Yeaaaahhhh – trading cards! brings be back to the late 80s…i would love em!

Cool beans.

ME! Memememememememeee!!! Pick ME!! You made me love you with Beyonce, and then the Sloth and Kangaroo stories. Hope you have some fun on your book tour.

OMG. You have your own trading card?? And to think I knew you when you were nothing but the PR Agent for the Blessed St. James Garfield. Well, I didn’t really know you. But I read your blog. And I tweeted at you. That passes as “knowing” these days, right? And St. James Garfield is blessed and that’s almost biblical and that adds a whole new dimension of “knowing” you which is probably best we don’t think about too much…

I’ll definitely buy the paperback too! Can’t wait till you come to San Fran!!

Monday we buried my grandma in the freezing rain just days after a blizzard. It was the fastest graveside service on record, with one family member staying in the car to keep warm and off the ice. Grandma, who didn’t want to waste money, was in a simply pine/cloth covered casket and I couldn’t help but love the clear plastic cover she had on. It was like a giant old ladies rain bonnet.

Afterwards the six of us went to the local diner for breakfast – where my Mom and Aunt agreed that Grandma wasn’t buried in the plot she paid for but this one was better and already dug so everyone wins.

I’m making my sister read your book before we come see you in Cincinnati!!

I am very much hoping to buy one, and see you on your stop in Dayton Ohio! Woot!

Really hoping the Canadian version has the extra chapter…..waiting for it to be available, then purchasing as soon as possible!!! Love it!

I’d love to win an autographed The Bloggess Geek a Week trading card! Today is the one year anniversary of my blog, “The Jousting Life”, so it would make a nice anniversary present from one very successful blogger to one aspiring blogger.
Zhi Zhu recently posted..This Weekend in New Zealand: "The Harcourt Park World Invitational Jousting Tournament"

A thing, a thing, a free thing! I need that, especially since it has your likeness! Loved the book, and even though I bought the hardcover sans extra chapter I don’t feel like I got the short straw. Also, regarding your post about random people un-following you on Twitter, my Twitter name gets me RANDOM messages from German bronies – written in German, which I do not speak – how cool/messed up is that!?!

Oh, yes, please, I would love a Bloggess geek a week card.

I never win anything. Things largely suck right now. I could use a pick-me-up.

Now I get to pay it forward, book style! I’m gonna get the paperback, read the shit out of that new chapter, and then leave it somewhere it can be useful, like soup shop where all the angsty teens get lunch, or the my gynecologist’s office. Thank you!!!

Please pick me..I would love one of your cards!

I’m debating between Cincinnati (which I’ve finally learned how to spell properly) and Louisville (which I’ve always known how to pronounce properly). Of course, they don’t have to be mutually exclusive. Oh, and I have lots of books, so I could use MORE bookmarks.

Feel free to make a side-trip to Lexington while you’re in the fine state of KY, so I don’t have to battle my anxiety to drive out of town. Here’s a fun fact: William Shatner lives just west of Lexington in a town called Versailles, and I’ve heard it rumored that he visits Joseph-Beth (the bookseller you will be visiting in Cincinnati) from time to time. No lie.

I’m contemplating coming to see you in either Dayton or Cincinnati, but why can’t you come to Columbus, too? Or should I just suck it up and drive the little bit, since you have already come so far?

Hmm…this is weird.

Since I am positive that you have been desperately trying to figure out a way to gain my forgiveness for not coming to a city close to me, I suppose that I could consider accepting one of these cards as an apology. The pain has been great but I could forgive you and we could be besties again. Ok maybe we will never be besties but I can dream right?

I’ll take a card, not that I need it as most books I read are on my tablet.
But hey I have your hardback book and got screwed out of the extra chapter so you owe me one, Right ?

Love your style of BatShit Crazy.

I totally want one. Mabe it will help with my depression over no longer being able to use my standard username, danalynn227 due to MY NAME having a naughty word unit that is now block by a bunch of sites….wtf.

You make laugh out loud so often,thank-you so much! I have shared your blog and book with many friends. Can’t wait to see your new book.

I purchased the hardback three times for three different friends (almost bought a fourth but thought you might think I was stalking you), and I can’t wait to finally own my own copy. We plan on seeing you in Cincinnati and can’t wait!

Jenkins, you motherfucker is my favorite chapter (so far). We just had jumbo quail the other day for dinner. I was reading it at work laast week (during my lunch hour, of course!) and was weeping with laughter. I am pretty sure my male co owrkers just thought I was weeping. My sister got me reading your blog and was so excited your book was coming out. She died of cancer right before it was published and did not get to see it. So I bought it and am loving it. I needed the laughter. And the weeping. Thanks.