This just in. Guy Kawasaki did not invent the motorcycle.

This is an update on yesterday’s super-exciting post so if you missed it you need to go there and read it first because otherwise you are going to be totally more confused than usual.

Guy Kawasaki is pretty much completely in love with me and this marks the first time ever that I’ve been myself around a celebrity and they didn’t look at me like I shit on the floor.  I was certain that after my last email he would have banned my blog from the cool kid list forever but in fact, he actually continued to email me:


35,000 pageviews ain’t hay as they say in Texas? (Do they really say this in Texas?) I didn’t invent the motorcycle but people think I look like Jackie Chan.



I’m disappointed about the motorcycle thing but the good news is that
Jackie Chan is totally hot.  (As evidenced by this picture of my
black-market-Chinese-copy of Cannonball Run which is completely


Also, I’m a fifth generation Texan and I’ve never heard anyone say that hay
thing in my entire life.  But in honor of you I am totally going to start
saying it all the time.



And then Guy twittered about me, which is like winning an Oscar for best design of a battery-operated series of fog machines.  Totally amazing and kind of embarrassing all at the same time.  Also?  Nothing to sneer at make hay about.

Anyway, I’d just like to thank Mr. Kawasaki for being the one of the first genuinely nice celebrities to not make me feel like a total douchebag and I plan on sending a copy of this to Ken Hoffman who could certainly take a lesson from Guy and needs to realize that just  acknowledging a fan letter won’t mean that I’ll get all delusional and suddenly be convinced that we’re now “best friends forever” and show up at your house on holidays.  It’s too late now, Ken, but it would have meant a lot to me way back when I was just some random chick to you.  Back when I wasn’t engaged to Guy Kawasaki. 

I’d also like to point out that when you google “Ken Hoffman” (who is a well-known columnist and author) the 6th thing that pops up is “Ken Hoffman is a jerk” which unfortunately I have to agree with (and which coincidentally I wrote myself).

 Sorry, Ken.  Guess you shouldn’t have made hay at me with me too me out of me.

PS.   Guy, this hay phrase is really not working for me.  How about instead I make your name into a verb?  Like “Hell yes!  My blog got Kawasakied today!”

Kawasakied:  To be acknowledged by someone who totally kicks ass but if you told your mom about it she’d be like “What?  What’s a blog?  Hey, is that the guy who invented the motorcycle?”

94 replies. read them below or add one

  1. I love that you wrote yourself a sentiment with which you totally agree. Glad to hear that you stand behind your opinions.

    Jess’s last blog post..I need a puppy NOW.

  2. Is that a mullet Jackie Chan has in that photo? If so, that’s awesome! I swear one of these days I’m going to cut my hair into a mullet . . . I think I’m going to reserve it for a punishment to my kid if he does something really bad as a form of embarassment. I will then insist upon walking him to the front door of school rocking my mullet.

    Man, I’m one messed up chick.

    Law School Hot Mama’s last blog post..Yes, I am a Child of the Corns

  3. I met Guy at BlogHer 2006 and he is so gracious and wonderful in person too. He remembers everyone and makes everyone feel special. He should totally come in pill form so I can take him daily.

    (Your next comment will be from guy saying he doesn’t remember me, I’m sure – because I’m a pessimist like that but back then I was Karen from troll Baby and some aren’t making the connection between that and Sugarpants.)

    My point is, I love Guy and I love you and I wish you years of happiness and joy together.

    Karen Sugarpants’s last blog post..Muffintop In Da House!

  4. Jenny – You so funny!!

  5. I have never heard of this hay thing either. Does it imply that hay is an inferior crop in some way? Cause I don’t get that. Hay’s allright by me.

    You are a FIFTH generation Texan. Awesome.

    Tessie’s last blog post..Not Making This Up

  6. I thought all of us deliberately stocked up on forms of embarrassment to be eventually used upon our children.

    Damn, I have a whole room of my house dedicated to it. Now I’ll have to make it into a gym or something.

    markira’s last blog post..Haircut

  7. Stop killing me*. I’m at work for crying out loud.

    Guy Kawasaki sounds even radder than I already thought he was. And it sounds like Ken Hoffman totally pissed off the wrong, uh, haystack…?? (<< does that work? Probably not, but then again I’m not originally from Texas) 😛

    * ‘killing’ as in, making me laugh until I can no longer breathe.

  8. I think using an unfamiliar phrase (which I have never heard in the 18 years that Ihave been a Texan) is like trying to find a hoffman in a haystack.

    Sandy’s last blog post..When Buddy Met Sally

  9. The hay thing must not be southern. I’ve never heard it uttered in Georgia either.

    Why have I never heard of Guy Kawasaki? Because I’m incredibly unhip probably.

    Sauntering Soul’s last blog post..Fun Monday – The origins of Sauntering Soul. And some food!

  10. OMG…and then like, i saw how he twittered you and so i clicked to follow him and then i got an email saying that he’s totally following me and i was so freaking excited like OH MA GA.

    and then i thought of all the cool celebrities i’ve met like neil diamond who totally has a picture of 6 year old me somewhere or bono who was insanely impressed that i almost fainted while clutching his shoulder and simultaneously orgasming for being so close to him.


  11. I like Kawasakied much better. 🙂

    Maria [Immoral Matriarch]’s last blog post..My Mind is in the Gutter.

  12. So obviously you have this mighty influence over Jackie Kawasaki. When is he adding a general, personal blog category to AllTop?

    Erica’s last blog post..New Skillz!

  13. Tell us if your stats reveal a “Kawasaki Effect.”

    Blog Starr’s last blog post..A “blog” by any other name… wouldn’t rhyme with “flog”

  14. According to, Kawasaki is, indeed, a motorcycle. Perhaps they have overlooked your oft used verb version of the word.

    Jeff’s last blog post..The Most Embarrassing Video Evar

  15. Update on my comment to the last post:

    Yup. It’s official.
    I love you.

    CircusKelli’s last blog post..Sunday Matinee

  16. You crack. me. up.

    ali’s last blog post..Post-Miami Dispatch

  17. That is so cool that Guy was so friendly! I love his blog, even if he didn’t invent the motorcycle.

    Lady M’s last blog post..I Wear Clown Pants

  18. The first time I read that I thought you’d say your dog got Kawasakied today. And I thought “What a nice guy to acknowledge your dog” and then I thought Jenny doesn’t even have a dog, does she? and I got all indignant that he didn’t even love you enough to know that you have a half-paralized-tub-cat and a probably-mostly-normal-but-lives-in-a-crazy-house cat instead of a dog, and why was he such a nice guy if he didn’t even know that?

    Then I re-read it and saw you were actually takling about your blog. Much different. I will withdraw my indignation. And posssibly get new glasses.

  19. Ah, yes. A thoroughly enjoyable post.

    princess slea’s last blog post..weekend update

  20. Guy Kawasaki, much like Geddy Lee sings very high, but when he talks, he speaks like an ordinary guy.

    I’m your fact checkin’ cuz.

    furiousball’s last blog dah do da doooo? charge!

  21. I’ve got you beat by one generation….So THERE! NYAH. Just kidding. And, I will make it my mission in life to help you get kawasakied into Webster’s. Oh, and this 6th generation Texan? Has never heard hay either.

    Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..From the Red (flash)Light District

  22. well I am too busy trying not to say his name GHEE in my head, all french like, as I am wont to do. Because we girls from Louisiana like to Frenchify things. Things that have no business being frenchified like

    Fransh Freeee

    flutter’s last blog is usually the way

  23. My hubby has a man crush on Guy Kawasaki.

    P.S. You’re officially on my cool kid list…which probably makes you feel about as cool as if your mom had made that statement. But hey, you’re linked to my blog now!

  24. so – ain’t hay – is that a lot or not a lot?

    Dawn’s last blog post..Letter to my body

  25. Dude I read your blog everyday (well I check for updates daily and read them when they are there). I havent commented till now but just wanted to let you know your totally famous to me. I found you at mama drama and have been a blog stalker of yours ever since! Stalker in a good way, not the creepy peer in your windows at night way; although I would love to meet the tub cat in real life. Anywho- I felt a bond with the 5th gen. Texan thing because I too am a 6th gen Texan. Ive never heard the hay thing either… but have lots of other wierd texan sayings from the great-grandparents!

  26. I’m very thrilled for you Jenny. Even though Karen Sugerpants there says he’s nice to everyone.

    I have heard that ain’t hay and I live in the northeast.

    For example

    friend 1 says “I saw Shaun Cassidy in concert at the state fair” and friend 2 would say “Well that ain’t hay! I MET Shaun Cassidy at the state fair…and he signed my Da Do Run Run Run single”

    Luann’s last blog post..dreams

  27. Ken is a jerk…maybe the next time he goes through the drive thru he’ll get a soda thrown at him. Is that mean to say? Oh well, he never publishes my comments to him. I think he’s worried I’ll show him up.

  28. dude, I am so anamored of you.

    Absolutely Bananas’s last blog post..Make Me Laugh Monday

  29. I had to google Guy Kawasaki, because I had no clue who he is. Seems like a good guy to have in love with you.

    Congrats on being recognized as a blogger of note. I love it when “little” bloggers (BTW, you get more hits than I do) get noticed.

  30. I am totally using Kawasakied in a sentence. Perhaps daily.

    Karmyn R’s last blog post..Red-Breasted Sapsucker

  31. I think there is a much more pressing question to be answered here:

    Did you make it through the movie in its entirety?

    Sometimes I think Jackie Chan’s legs are made of peach-Os. Do you think Guy’s are similarly gummy?

    Spirophita’s last blog post..Random

  32. First of all, you guys are totally cracking me up. Slumber party at my house. You’re all invited.

    Secondly, I don’t know what peach-O’s are but I assume that it’s some sort of delicious Canadian candy.

  33. You are so famous. (and hilarious)

    Kyla’s last blog post..Little Boy Blue

  34. You are Texan cubed! No wait. That’s three, huh? So what’s the Texan to the fifth power? The power to kick ass, I guess.

    anne nahm’s last blog post..And When I Say the Letters ?PMS?, the Theme of this Post Becomes Clear.

  35. Oh Bloggess(you will note that I never use your real name, even though I believe it’s something like Jen or Jenny or Jamiriquai), to me, YOU are the celebrity blogger deigning to view my silly little blog.

    But, it’s totally awesome that you got Kawasakied! Plus, if you haven’t thought about this, with your blogroll, we could ALL get kawasakied, which may take away some of the power of the kawasaki…ing……ism………ness.

    I know something about Texas. It’s big. Knowledge passed.

    Michael’s last blog post..So, I was going to…

  36. Ok, now you’re starting to scare me.

  37. According to my Hubby, the Kansas farmboy, making hay bales totally sucks. So we vote for Kawasakied!

    Someday I’m going to have to break down and go on Twitter, but it’s going to have to wait until my kids can work the toaster oven and feed themselves.

    Jerseygirl89’s last blog post..I’d Like To Thank The Academy. . . .

  38. LOL.

    He’s right, you are funny.

    And yes, he is cool. I emailed asking if he could add my site and he e-mailed back saying yes AND he didn’t gag, throw rotten tomatoes or anything at my little site.

    I am a first gen. Texan. My mom is Italian and my dad Danish. Wicked combo there, but I can say Ya’ll with an italian accent, so that’s something. My hubby is something like 4th generation Galveston..I believe his paternal g-g-granddad was a transplant.

    jody’s last blog post..Gin Freeze-or how to make a frozen drink when you allowed the house to run out of RUM!

  39. Ditto what Michael said, except that I do call you Jenny. Apparently as often as possible.

    Headless Mom’s last blog post..Joy is hard

  40. Kind of like when you put me on your blogroll at my own request…. TOTALLY Kawasakied.

    kittenpie’s last blog post..Ease My Troubles, That’s What You Do.

  41. I have to stop reading you while I’m at work…I laugh so loud the people here look at me funny…and you know, I work in an ICU where belly laughs are not really *appropriate*. 😉 hehehe.

    Anna’s last blog post..Throwdown…Bobby Flay Style

  42. First of all I love you! Sometimes I have no idea what to say in comments because I am not as witty or charming as you or many of the other commenters. But, I try!

    Second, I am changing my name sort of, to Erica/TxGambit because I see another Erica has started commenting….. I have to stand out, some how!

    Erica/TxGambit’s last blog post..Divorce with kids doesn’t mean the relationship ends….

  43. Erica/Tx Gambit – You stand out where ever you are. You are awesome and adorable. Never second guess commenting here. Because I love comments. Even the ones that are mildly insulting.

    Ah hell, *especially* the ones that are mildly insulting.

  44. Jenny, you mean to say YOU’RE a 5G Texan? Hey, so is my wife – at least a 5G, maybe even a 6G!

    ~EdT (1G Texan – but my parents came here as soon as they could!)

    Ed T.’s last blog post..That Old-Time Photograph

  45. pretty hot pic of Jackie Chan…and I’m totally with you on the “Kawasakied” thing…if we all start using it we could start a movement…a good one…not the other kind

    Amy Castellano’s last blog post..We are the champions….

  46. He does seem nice and also smart! Because he has realized that you are VERY funny. 🙂

    jm’s last blog post..Replacing a Radiator Air Vent

  47. Amy – I am sooo glad you cleared that up, you know, about the “movement” thing. ‘Cuz I would sure hate to see this comment thread go down the crapper or anything… 😉


    Ed T.’s last blog post..From Hail-ish Tuesday to Wordless Wednesday

  48. Oh yeah? Well … *I* got an e-mail from Jimmy Honda! Who is he, you ask? He’s … this famous … he made .. he’s so … just shut up. I’m also cool.

    [Stinkin’ Guy Kawasaki and his being cool.]

    p.s. I’m totally going to befriend Ken Hoffman now.

    p.p.s. Ok, I’m not. And not just because he won’t return my phone calls. It’s also because I think his hair is weird. It gives me nightmares.

    p.p.p.s I’m sorry. You’re much cooler than I am. I lost my head. Also, I think Guy Kawasaki has blocked me.

  49. He’s right – you are HI-larious (as we say in TX)

    ..and I am sending you some peach-o’s, because not knowing about peach-o’s is a cryin’ shame

    Katy’s last blog post..Baby Love

  50. Jenny: living proof that friendly stalking sometimes works!

    Or, ah, something like that.

    *Ditches career in t-shirt sloganizing.*

    What’s funny is that as cool as GK is, whenever a higher level blogger drops by on my blog (for whatever bizarre reason), I feel all Kawasakied! Or Bloggessed or sumthin’.

    Whee! I need more sleep. *thud!*

    Hatchet’s last blog post..OMG!

  51. Dude, I’m all about getting Kawasakied. That could mean so many things.

    Like, Guy came over last night and after a bottle of wine, he “Kawasakied” me.

    But I’m kinda with Hatchet on the “Bloggessed” thing.

    Do “Kawasakied” and “agita” belong together in the “dictionary”?

    AMomTwoBoys’s last blog post..Bro’s Before Ho’s

  52. You guys are cracking me up.

    AMomTwoBoys – My favorite part of your comment is how you put “dictionary” in quotes.

  53. Jenny you crack me up. I was having a really shitty day but now I’m not. I heart you. Thanks. But I’m totally not going to stalk you because I’m just not into you like that. Sorry.

    Sabrina’s last blog post..Hazards of Having Healthy Acquaintances

  54. I love that you created a new category just for this.

    Jessica’s last blog post..Ashley and Jason

  55. See, you never needed Amy Sedaris!

    PunditMom’s last blog post..Mothers of Intention: i miss the dream, by CityMama

  56. Do I get to go to the wedding??

    Tracey’s last blog post..Give Me Titles People!

  57. kawasaki = officially a verb in my books.

    ali’s last blog post..ali secret #421

  58. I think the hay thing is a midwestern thing. I’ve got a few backward relatives that use it often.

    slackermommy’s last blog post..I’ve been dumped by the blogosphere

  59. I always thought kawasawki had something to do with a type of sake that came from a cow.

    Swampy’s last blog post..The “Eyes” Have It

  60. “Kawasakied” has my vote for the word of 2008 with all credit going to The Bloggess! It’s the w00t of 2008!

    In the meantime, you’re also on Alltop’s sister site Truemors!


    NEENZ’s last blog post..From the Mind of NEENZ: New Look, New Approach

  61. Jenny, I’m a total moron and just realized you left me my first comment…like forever ago.
    Me = Dumbass
    Is it too late to get on your blogroll? Obviously I have some work to do in the whole blogging etiquette department.

    P.S. I had no idea who Guy Kawasaki was until now…I thought at first he was a porn star. He’s obviously a freaking genius for recognizing your awesomeness. Word.

    Yo Mama’s Blog’s last blog post..HOLY SHIT!

  62. Guy is one of the nicest guys out there. And he didn’t even get a restraining order when I threw myself at his feet and offered to have his Internet baby at BlogHer. (At least I don’t think he did.)

    You are so worth being Kawasakied. (Even if it does sound a little dirty!)

    I do have a blog crush on you. Can I come to the slumber party? Better yet, will be down there in March. Drinks on me!

    Jenn’s last blog post..Guy Kawasaki said I am Tops. (Okay he said a lot of others are, too but this is my blog.)

  63. Jenny,

    You gotta stop writing about me. The Alltop servers can’t handle the clickthroughs.

    “Sake from a cow” sure beats “cow’s ass sagging.”


  64. Um…did Guy Kawasaki just leave me a comment? Did that just happen?



  65. Is that a haiku or something?

  66. WTG, Jenny! You’re crashing another server! LOL *tosses pies at you* (your favorites, of course) 😀

    The Pear Lady’s last blog post..Weekend poetry session

  67. […] had to blog about one of the funniest posts I’ve read in a long time. As I was perusing my Twitter stream to see what I missed today […]

  68. […] you as a geek), or know who Guy Kawasaki is (again…automatic geek qualification) to enjoy this, but it nearly made me pee my pants from laughing when I read this post and the comments.  […]

  69. You gotta stop writing about me. The Alltop servers can’t handle the clickthroughs.

    It’s time to coin a new term, folks and fellow geeks. To be “Bloggessed” = to be featured on, which results in your server melting under the ensuing avalanche of hits.

    Gary Kawasaki: you have been Bloggessed.



    Ed T.’s last blog post..From Hail-ish Tuesday to Wordless Wednesday

  70. You. Are. So. Funny. You are my hero. While Guy did not invent the motorcycle, I think he is a total rockstar. Guy has been nice about promoting my blog.

    whitetrashmom’s last blog post..Project Runway – It’s Sew Time!

  71. By Jove, Jenny, I think you’ve done it!


    Ed T.’s last blog post..Announcing the Dawn of a New Epoch

  72. I’ve heard of “hay.” I’ve never heard of “fun.”

  73. First Jenny was Kawasakied, then Guy was Bloggessed? I need a cigarette. Ass.

  74. I’m still blinded (Kawasakied?) by 35k. You rock. I’m so not worthy.

    Nora Bee’s last blog post..My barista is emotionally unavailable

  75. Ed T, I hearby claim first use and partial authorship to the term Bloggessed, with AMomTwoBoys having seconded the notion and yourself formalizing the idea.

    Internets: you’re welcome!

    Hatchet’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday

  76. Well his little Twitter photo certainly is hot. Babe, you’re my idol. First Will, then Amy, now Guy. The Bloggess is taking over the world, baby!

  77. What the hay (btw, folks, that’s how we used the term, down here in H-Town), did I just mis-spell Guy Kawasaki’s first name as “Gary” up above!? That’ll cost me at least a couple of k3wlness points, I’m afraid :snif:

    Hatchet/AMomTwoBoys – sure, I’m OK with that! There’s plenty of blame credit to go around.

    I just can’t wait for MDcQIII, though – by which time JtB should need a limo, a red carpet, hordes of pararazzi, and Ryan Seacrest to do the entrance interview.

    Then, they can feature her Halloween photoshoot on The Soup 😉


    Ed T.’s last blog post..The method changes, but the mission stays the same

  78. Yeah, “what the hay” is how it’s done up in Maine, too.

    I’d ask to be Bloggessed but I think you have to be famous first? Although, as mentioned before, just being linked as a fave by the Bloggess on Technorati was enough to jump my rank by A QUARTER MILLION POINTS.

    And I *am* on the blogroll, people, and not in the invisible font, either (although close). I really cannot ask for much more.

    Well, I can, because I’m greedy like that. mk

    markira’s last blog post..Blogaholic

  79. I am convinced your comments have turned into a forum and have thus created a forog, a hybrid.

    And Peach-Os are all-american. They also come in flavors of Apple-Os and Strawberry-Os, though Peach-Os are most popular. They are gummies covered in sugar, shaped like little doughnuts. Guaranteed right on the package to rot your teeth. Enjoy!

    Spirophita’s last blog post..Swim Workout #4

  80. A “forog”. You are totally right, Spirophita. Although technically I think I might prefer “blogum”.

  81. Have you seen Guy’s latest twit on the subject?

    Even The Netherlands is taking about you 🙂

    imelda’s last blog post..Attention dog owners…

  82. Got here from Guy’s tweet. I might be sticking around a while. The Bloggess is downright entertaining.

    I’m 1G (or 2G? Does it count if your parents weren’t born here but moved to Texas when they were elementary school age and have never left?) Texan. Never heard hay used that way before. I definitely like Kawasakied and Blogessed way better.

    Becky Mochaface’s last blog post..Hump Day Humor: Jimmy and Sarah

  83. i continuously love your blog. and by commenting on my blog, i feel you’ve “kawasakied” me. you’re my fave blog on my blogroll. blog, blog, blog

    teresa’s last blog post..Colbert Handles Starbucks Closing With Aplomb

  84. Can we just add “jewlery” and “realator” (realtor), to that list?

    Jennifer’s last blog post..Tree, meet apple

  85. And I just commented on the wrong link.

    Jennifer’s last blog post..Tree, meet apple

  86. This is why I shouldn’t miss time in blog land cause then I miss good laughs when I coulda used them. You are to funny

    wolfbaby’s last blog post..I swear there are birthday pics

  87. […] Bloggess this week you missed a lot.  Guy Kawasaki became besotted with me,  I made his name into a verb, my cat died, and Ken Hoffman continued to ignore me.  In a matter of […]

  88. fog…beginning…to clear…

    slowly…making sense…of it all…

    It only took me reading multiple posts, multiple times over the course of multiple days…!

    Which, I’m sorry to report, is NOTHING like a multiple orgasm.

    Robin’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday ~ Beached

  89. Hay Jenny, This was just a complete crack up. Thanks for the laugh!

    theotherbear’s last blog post..Toto

  90. Harharhar! You’re really hilarious! You’re in my Reader beginning right noW : )

    Rey’s last blog post..New Ellips Cologne TVC TEASER feat. Andi9

  91. […] changed them anyway, just to be sure.  So, yes readers, I have now been Kawasakied, just like The Bloggess, and I’m borrowing her word just to describe the greatness of this moment for me.  Of […]

  92. […] So what if my family doesn’t think I’m cool? So what if I’m on Social Services’ watch list? I’ve been Kawasakied. […]

  93. That’s awesome Bloggess! I am a die-hard motorcycle guy and every time I see Guy kawasaki’s name on Twitter, I think about bike…too funny. Maybe I should send Guy an email as well. LOL
    .-= Crown Multimedia´s last blog ..Sportbike Stunts: Stoppies, Wheelies, Burnouts and Babes! =-.

5 trackbacks

Leave a Reply