Actual sentence I overheard in the elevator this week that was so upsetting that I had to write it down so I wouldn’t forget it:
“But I thought she been done did that.”
Really? You thought she “been done did that”? This is what we’ve come to, blonde-girl-in-the-elevator-who-makes-me-cry-for-America? This is the point when I’d come up with some sarcastic line that’s actually more atrocious than the thing you just said but I’ve been working on it for the last two hours and I think it’s pretty much totally impossible. Forget “fustrated”, “birfday” and “liberry”, you’ve just made all of those seem like quaint colloquialisms. Next time I see you I’m shooting you in the face.
Best comment of the day: And when you do make sure you’re screaming, I’M MAKING BASKETTI FOR DINNER! BASKETTI, MUTHAFUCKA! ~ Mamatulip