My fame is awesome/humbling/nonexistent in the real world

I was totally shocked when Michael informed me that I’d been entered into the annals of history by way of the Urban Dictionary:

dictionary.jpg

And I, of course, giggled and blushed and decreed that my coworkers begin walking 3-5 feet behind me to demonstrate their inferiority to me. 

Then I clicked on one of the tags Michael included in the definition and discovered this:

dictionary2.jpg

Touché, Willowtree.  

And just like that, my over-inflated ego collapsed and the world went on much the same as always. 

But I’m still going to need all of you to start referring to me with an honorific title like “your excellency”.  Or if we’ve gotten drunk together, something less formal like “The Dread Lady of Blogsylvania”. 

Also, no eye contact.

PS.  If you look up “Bloggessed” in the “real” dictionary it gives you this as the closest match:

dictionary3.jpg

Insulting and scarily fitting.

Comment of the day:  Back in 1974, when I was the karate champ of Flitners Corner, Wyoming (I actually moved to Flitners Corner solely for the reason that there was no karate studios in the area and the relatively low population, figured I could become the champ once I created the contest and lightly (aka light as in not) advertised). I became the subject of similar such notoriety. The only contestant I had to defeat, Lyle P. Ligonberry became the victim of the very first Scrotal Tornado. What happened (mostly by accident), was my toe got caught in his wrestling singlet (Lyle apparently thought wrestling was karate) and I fell. I flipped over snapping back into action. In the process of doing so, I had started torquing his nutsack into something resembling a flesh colored twister lollipops. Ergo, my toe and your mind have a lot in common – both famous and both excellent at twisting nutsacks. ~furiousball

67 thoughts on “My fame is awesome/humbling/nonexistent in the real world

Read comments below or add one.

  1. The “real” dictionary definition sounds pretty right on. And I mean that in the best way possible.

  2. I thought these references were just clever photoshopping on your part, so I went to urbandictionary.com to find out. Now I must apologize for my doubt.

    On a side note, a blogfuck refers to
    when a blog entry refers to several other blogging individuals, often in the act of reminiscing about shared escapades the night before.

    You know, like M.D. Con Queso II.

    Jeff’s last blog post..Shower the people

  3. Back in 1974, when I was the karate champ of Flitners Corner, Wyoming (I actually moved to Flitners Corner solely for the reason that there was no karate studios in the area and the relatively low population, figured I could become the champ once I created the contest and lightly (aka light as in not) advertised). I became the subject of similar such notoriety. The only contestant I had to defeat, Lyle P. Ligonberry became the victim of the very first Scrotal Tornado. What happened (mostly by accident), was my toe got caught in his wrestling singlet (Lyle apparently thought wrestling was karate) and I fell. I flipped over snapping back into action. In the process of doing so, I had started torquing his nutsack into something resembling a flesh colored twister lollipops. Ergo, my toe and your mind have a lot in common – both famous and both excellent at twisting nutsacks.

    furiousball’s last blog post..my $heart = ?;

  4. Okay, well I guess this would explain all the hits I’m getting from here. Frankly I’m surprised it’s even in there, I got a message saying it was cancelled before it was reviewed by the editors. I just assumed even the Urban Dictionary people were scared of you too.

    Willowtree’s last blog post..Not another pet clip?!

  5. Oh mercy, it’s a wonder your head still fits through the doorway these days…or does it?! 😉

    *picture it: a big ballooned head on your little body* It’s almost like reverse Jenny Craig before shot…or is that after…hmm. 😀

    The Pear Lady’s last blog post..Take me out the ball game

  6. I feel the accusation about you “killing your cat” for blog fodder is horribly unfair. I say this whilst not looking you directly in the eyes. Kinda like Harry Hamlin’s character in “Clash of the Titans”…but not because I’m afraid you’ll turn me to stone.

    AB’s last blog post..Don’t make me color with “Asparagus”.

  7. Well, I gotta tell you Jenny, if someone tells me they got Blogessed, what I’m really thinking is that they got *lucky*. Know what I mean? Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more!

  8. I will let you borrow my tiara if you promise not to let it clash with your shoes. Better still, send me photos of your shoes and I will let you know which to wear with the tiara or suggest where to purchase proper shoes.

    Do Bloggesseseseses’s whatever, even wear tiaras?

    Kelley’s last blog post..Hello Kitty. Well, Hello Kitty!!

  9. I have never been Bloggessed. However, I have often been referred to as a Bloglodyte.

    …yeah, I know it’s not a good thing.

  10. I wish I could post an awesome comment that would cause people to spit coffee out their noses. But I can’t top the awesomeness of Furiousball. Seriously. What’s better than Scrotal Tornado?

    Becky Mochaface’s last blog post..LOST S4ep7

  11. Your Majesty, I humbly thank you for giving me credit. I’m not sure what it’s called when your name appears in an actual POST by Her Highness Herself, the exalted Bloggess, but it’s probably worth a lot. I can probably skate on this one for about 3 weeks!

    I’ll leave you now, curtsying as I slowly back away with my eyes to the ground. And yes, even though I am a man, I prefer the curtsy to the bow, it just seems more elegant.

    Michael’s last blog post..TT # blah! 13 things I do, other than work.

  12. WTF???

    Because I a)have no life, and b)am a textbook example of narcissism, I just clicked on the link you gave to my blog, all I can say is “why you dirty….“, some day I’ll get you.

    Willowtree’s last blog post..Not another pet clip?!

  13. Bolloxed is also a lovely way of saying ‘Woo! Too much booze/ weed/ tamazepam for me, I need to go to bed’ – at least in England anyway, y’know, when we aren’t drinking tea and that.

    x

    Little Kid’s last blog post..Joe Abercrombie Review

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