It doesn't help that I don't pronounce the L in "caulk".

I just saw this ad from the Blogher network and I cannot stop laughing at it.  Apparently GE Caulk is running some sort of contest for reviews about their awesome caulk and they decided to do an ad featuring some of the best caulk stories. 

Hi.  I’m eight:

I’m eight and I’m about to get kicked off my ad network.


Worth it.

PS.  Remember when I said there was a real, legitimate post coming?   Obviously I was lying. 

Comment of the day:  You made me very happy. I took this recently for similar reasons: ~Ingrid

84 replies. read them below or add one

  1. One of my bloggy friends was sore from caulking. I told her not to hold it so tightly. He he he!! I love making caulk jokes with my hubby. It’s great fun!! Hi, I’m eight too!

    Traceytreasure’s last blog post..WOW!

  2. well, you know we have a motto in my house: just caulk it.

    covers everything.

    test that out, will you?

  3. All I can think about is the big long caulk (gun) and what comes out of it.

    Heather’s last blog post..One Day Closer to Menopause

  4. Caulk-a-doodle doo.

    That’s all I got.

    Amy In Ohio’s last blog post..Does this scarf make me look like a terrorist?

  5. I’m never gonna be comment of the day.

    Amy In Ohio’s last blog post..Does this scarf make me look like a terrorist?

  6. Try walking into Home Depot or some place along those lines and asking or saying one of the following:

    Where can I find some caulk?
    It’s an emergency, I need caulk!
    Do you have any caulk for me?

    kate’s last blog post..List of complaints

  7. Caulk! It’s what’s for dinner.

    Lauren’s last blog post..Geek of the Week: Twhirl

  8. Caulk Singles, okay, but if you get doubles (or triples) it’s exponentially more fun.

    Or, so I’ve heard.

    ben’s last blog post..Want!

  9. Remember that you really need to work your caulk into the crack. Also make sure that the crack is smooth and clean any residue that caulk may leave

  10. Ha Ha HA. Not just you, promise.
    I thought very similar dirty things.
    Do any southerners pronounce the ‘L’?
    I don’t.

    rachel’s last blog post..Swinging and Sprinklers

  11. Only communists pronounce the L.

    And grown-ups possibly.

  12. Did you ever watch The Man Show? Go see this:

    Ree’s last blog post..Let’s Talk About Sex-ku

  13. This makes me sad. Cause we don’t say caulk like you guys so in my head while I am saying it in my Aussie accent I am all ‘yeah what now?’

    So I get Boo to say it. Cause he vacillates between being French and American.

    It is even funnier said by a nine year old with a French accent.

    Kelley’s last blog post..Duuuude! Point that thing outside.

  14. Caulk Singles. They go great in the kid’s lunches. Also, it’s a nice alternative to the lead paint bites I used to pack for them.

    Greta’s last blog post..Reasons Why I Am Bad…

  15. LOL.

    Maria’s last blog post..Maybe this is why I can’t believe…

  16. I’m really precise with my caulk. I followed every groove and bend of each crack, laying it down smooth and thick. I slowly work the caulk into the deep crevices to build up to the last smooth even stroke, pushing hard on the caulk base to get every last drop of that precious goo out. It’s funny how I didn’t know how many things improve with caulking. I am getting more caulk this weekend, even if I have to pay for it this time!

    Deb on the Rocks’s last blog post..Grad-u-ate Good Times, Come On!

  17. Also…I have the same ad group, and sometimes weeks go by when they can’t find a profanity free post in somewhat good taste to feature at the bottom of their ads. I’m doubting that we’ll see this post of yours featured either.

    Deb on the Rocks’s last blog post..Grad-u-ate Good Times, Come On!

  18. Is that why the expensive caulk lasts so long? Yeah, that makes sense. If you pay more for cock caulk, it should last longer, shouldn’t it?

  19. girlfriend, you totally put the “b” in subtle. word.

    akways, buddy’s last blog post..Friday

  20. Seriously – I’m in my 40’s and can’t say caulk without wanting to giggle… because of which I go to great lengths to always try to pronounce the L so I don’t start giggling, and then I just sort of sound like I decided to start gargling in the middle of the word.

    Love this post!! 🙂

  21. I like to take my caulk out when no one else is around.

  22. I totally looked up this video and then realized it’s CORK (minus the r) not CAULK (minus the l) – but anyway, still funny:

    Dawn’s last blog post..Hai-kyoot Friday

  23. i have a big penis

    furiousBall’s last blog post..Picassofonz

  24. My motto is: “A little caulk heals all wounds.” Or maybe I should change that to “A big caulk heals all wounds.”

    Tracey’s last blog post..Hung

  25. I ASKED BlogHer for the caulk, because it has been forever and I really need the caulk, but they claim my address is lost. Yeah, right. It’s because I’m fat, isn’t it?

    Suebob’s last blog post..Stuck in the middle

  26. All this caulk talk is making me horny.

    Bethany’s last blog post..Tagged!

  27. I haven’t read comments – sorry if this is a repeat, but right now? You have “quick finishing caulk”. Eww… They need Bob Dole as the spokesman.

    anne nahm’s last blog post..This Week’s Post Brought to You by the Letters F & U

  28. I say it cock. Which makes home repair FUN!

    flutter’s last blog post..Hunger

  29. If your caulk spews an off color discharge, you may want to take a closer look.

    Becky Mochaface’s last blog post..Vagina Expectations

  30. Do you pronounce the l in salmon?

    Wondering what salmon caulk would be like ….

    Damselfly’s last blog post..Kidvid

  31. Don’t be ridiculous, damselfly. There’s no I in “salmon”.

    Or “team”, I hear.

  32. I, too, am apparently eight.

    This is genius.

    Angella’s last blog post..Photo This, Photo That

  33. My husband is a contractor. He has so much caulk lying around the house we are tripping over it. What? It’s true.

    janet’s last blog post..You Don’t Bring Me Flowers…Anymore

  34. “Proper application of caulk starts with cutting the nozzle at a 45-degree angle. Insert the tube in the caulking gun, and remember to pull, don’t push, the caulk along the joint. Continue to fill the joint, making contact on both surfaces.”


    Musing’s last blog post..How the prom date who dumped me still ended up in my wedding

  35. seriously, it’s like a baby’s arm

    furiousBall’s last blog post..Picassofonz

  36. Goddamnit I suck at puns!

  37. 37

    To keep your caulk from drying up between uses, insert the largest size of galvanized nail that will fit in the hole, to serve as a plug.

    Also, when using caulk around the bathtub, be sure to clean up afterward. Otherwise, you might wind up with a caulk ring.

  38. Caulk…next best thing to duct tape AND duck tape!

    (Guess caulk tales are riveting??? After YOU get done with ’em they might be!)

    Robin’s last blog post..Cheap thrills and virgin experiences

  39. Turns out I pronounce the “l” in caulk as well. I just stared at the screen for a solid 2 minutes and 32 seconds trying to figure out what’s so funny about cauLLLk. And then I realized…OHHHH COCK!!! They’re making jokes about penises….haha…penises in cracks…penises in farm animals…swingin’ penises in bach. pads.

    GOT IT!!! very funny indeed.

    Kathy’s last blog post..Bragging Rights

  40. I used to wait around for my husband to do all the caulk jobs but he’s out of town this weekend. Oh well, I guess I’ll just have to do without caulk or just caulk myself!

    Barb @ getupandplay’s last blog post..Not in a gay way, just in a hey way…

  41. I recently took a group of college students to New Orleans to help with the rebuilding efforts. And I was given the duty of caulking. So of course, I couldn’t resist saying things like, “I love caulk”, “this caulk is so easy to use”, “is there another caulk around, because I’m done with this one” … and then I remembered the group I was leading was from a church.. where I work. whoops.

  42. 42
    Just A. Reader

    Caulk Singles? I frequently wish my caulk weren’t so damned single. Sometimes a caulk really just needs to fill a crack.

  43. Caulk me gently, caulk me slowly.

    Robin’s last blog post..Now with more stuff

  44. You said caulk. Heh heh.

    mommypie’s last blog post..Next Tuesday, it’s a date.

  45. Me too, Bethany, where do you live?? Wait, you aren’t that Bethany that I went to school with, are you? The one that had three legs, but only one arm? I guess I sure as as hell shoulda asked first, huh?

  46. In other words, I officially retract my invitation, but only if you’re THAT Bethany. If not, my address is wait, it might not have made me THAT horny. Fuck, maybe it didn’t really make me horny after all.

  47. Just like you to go off half-caulked.

    Jennifer H’s last blog post..A Room of Her Own, and a Giveaway

  48. You made me very happy. I took this recently for similar reasons:

    ingrid’s last blog post..wasting your time on a friday (15)

  49. snort snort. i loves me some nice dirty caulk jokes.

    Manager Mom’s last blog post..Are You There, God? It’s Me, Manager Mom

  50. And to think you left a caulk comment on one of my posts where you left the ‘u’ out when it should have been the ‘l’ all along!

    “After I had my episiotomy they used calk to fix that whole thing right up. Stupid me, I was all “You’re going to fix my vagina with cock?” Kick-ass!

    I was kind of high at the time and I’m relatively sure they were just joking about the calk thing anyway although it would explain why I looked like Franken-gina for a few weeks.”

    This doesn’t mean I don’t love you still.

    Alice’s last blog post..Sox – The Lorena Way

  51. How embarrassing. I left a drunken caulk comment *and* I spelled it wrong.

    Multiple times. I blame the caulk. Caulk can really mess with a girl’s mind.

  52. Oh Jenny, how I love your dirty mind!

    wright’s last blog post..Why We’ll Never Understand Each Other

  53. You said caulk you dirty girl.

    motherbumper’s last blog post..lookin’ for me?

  54. Wait, I thought these were you real posts. What have I been missing? Does it get worse or better from here?

    And you didn’t say one thing about my “ninja vaginas” phrase. So far, people have said that it should be the password for the BlogHer party and I have decided that we should have it printed on panties for the goody bags.

    Still nothin’ from you. That was for you.

    Velveteen Mind – Megan’s last blog post..Debunking, Defusing, and Demystifying the Big Name Blogger; Mommy or Otherwise. And Delurking You.

  55. Ninja vaginas for me?! You shouldn’t have.

  56. caulk. caulk. caulk. hahahahaha
    hi. i’m 12.

    ali’s last blog post..things that only happen to ali…and LOST!!!!

  57. As they say in swampy LA, “Caulk a deauxdle-deaux”.

    Oh, go stuff a caulk in it.


    Ed T.’s last blog post..This might explain why he won’t marry her…

  58. A few of the benefits of GE Caulk Singles direct from their web site:

    Easy-to-handle package

    No instruction, experience, or additional tools required

    Cut down prep time and clean-up time

    Small enough to store in small spaces, such as the kitchen drawer

    Easier to dispense with one hand, eliminating the need for a gun or excess tools

    Reduce unnecessary waste by evenly dispensing from front to back of package

    Perfect size for most common caulking jobs

  59. We are eight around the BlogHer office too, actually.

  60. OMG, Jenny. I just love you. And your caulk.

    Kyla’s last blog post..Psst…want to know a secret?

  61. That ad sucks. Matter of fact, I’d call it a caulksucker.

    Dad Gone Mad’s last blog post..Bea Arthur Is Coming To Get Us

  62. This post cracks me up, but Greta’s comment had me nearly on the floor. Here are several useful things to know about caulk: a little caulk goes a long way; and a wet finger is easiest thing to use to clean up caulk.

    MommyTime’s last blog post..Overheard Coming from the Bathroom…

  63. i can’t do caulk. no really, there is a natural rhythm to handling caulk and i’ve tried, but i suck. at it. like a white girl dancing.

  64. I think I have to stop reading you (and your comments) until this baby comes out and my bladder control returns.

    Thanks, another pair of panties in the laundry.

    Jenni’s last blog post..Double Standard

  65. That is a riot! And not only because every time I’ve seen that ad on someone’s blog I thought it was hysterical & came up with a whole caulk dialog of my own! Love it!

    BTW–thanks for stopping by my blog & leaving a comment–what an honor. 🙂

    Christy’s last blog post..Why My House Is Always A Mess (Reason #1)

  66. Cold caulk can get stiff and hard.

    Felicity’s last blog post..For the sake of the family…

  67. Our landlord at the office finds a way to fit into just about every conversation the following, “What you really need is a little caulk, cause, you know, a little caulk really goes a long way.”

    You don’t say.

    amanda’s last blog post..Punctuality is overrated…

  68. hey thanks for keeping us in the loop, everyone needs to know whats up with the Caulk

    randy’s last blog post..In Auburn, Ca for a week

  69. God I love caulk. Hell, I could use a good caulking right now – on my kitchen counter.

    Bring it on!

    Tranny Head’s last blog post..Whacked Out Weekend: Crackers!

  70. All these comments about caulk and caulking, makes me wonder if most of commenters are just caulk-teasers… Hmmmmm Maybe they’re all a bunch of caulk and bull stories, I don’t know…


  71. I got my white caulk in the mail, and well, it was way to small. And as far as good caulk goes, it wasn’t very satisfying.

    Shamelessly Sassy’s last blog post..The End of An Era: A Break-Up Letter

  72. Thank goodness that the Lege outlawed caulkfighting. And betting on caulkfights.


    Ed T.’s last blog post..Reason I’m glad I wasn’t alive millions of years ago…

  73. I’ve just said and read caulk so many times that I no longer know what it means, but it really is a funny word. I wonder if it could replace my excessive use of the F word, as in – Caulk Off! Does it feel as satisfying? No, but it has a nice mouth feel. I’m going to try it on for a few days.

    Ann’s last blog post..Best of Comments Vol. 1, With Cookies

  74. I love you! There just aren’t enough eight-year-old minds contained in adult women’s bodies out there! I see you’ve got plenty here…your audience rocks!
    I said “caulk” in my head twice before I even realized I don’t pronounce the “L” either. I will go share with my husband now. We’ve been meaning to use the silicone caulk all around the bathtub for months…

    2kids3martinis’s last blog post..Do You Like the New Look?

  75. UGH it sucks to be 75. Seriously. I must really like you.

    Okay the caulk one cracks me up (no pun intended) but the foot egg (you know the one I mean) gets me even more. I was already laughing at the commercials on TV for that.

    My mom cursed me and said, “Laugh laughing girl, your day is coming, and that egg will be your BEST FRIEND. Just you wait.”

    I thought she LIKED me.

    Julie Pippert’s last blog post..Where’s your comfort zone? Great, now jump out of it for the Hump Day Hmm!

  76. 76
    Just A. Reader

    You know you’re famous now. You don’t even have to write anything yourself. You just toss out a word like “caulk” and let your faithful followers entertain themselves. It’s kind of like when Sinatra didn’t have to sing the words anymore. “Doo-be-doo-be-doo…” And the fans went wild. You’re the Sinatra of Blogoslovakia.

  77. 77

    I have the best caulk story! I was 20 years old and working for a large real estate developer. The superintendent was dictating punch lists for me to type up for each subcontractor. He was saying “caulk around the shower”…I was typing “cock around the shower”. Yep – it went to all the subcontractors like that!

  78. I used to work at Home Depot in the Paint department. My favorite day ever was when a very large, very manly contractor walked up to me and asked where he could find the “big, black caulk.” I almost exploded trying to not laugh.

  79. Caulk, it’s what’s for dinner.

    My Caulk Project

    minnie’s last blog post..Okay, I love this kid

  80. you have no idea how hard (snort) it was for me to hold it (snicker) together for my own caulk-centric review.

    seriously challenged my loyalty to ads. i had to edit out a LOT.

    today though? i got all pockycaulk.

    gwendomama’s last blog post..Pick a Pack of Wacky Pocky

  81. OMG I am laughing my ass off.
    If onyl I was a boy so I could say I was laughing my caulk off.

    kittenpie’s last blog post..I, Trampoline

  82. omg, thank you, I thought I was the only one, and I was a little disturbed with myself.

    Busy Mom’s last blog post..In which summer sneaks up on me

  83. I once worked at a paint store and a lady came in and said

    “I need some black caulk.”

    I asked her to repeat herself three or four times so the entire store could hear her.

    Brody’s last blog post..The Order Disorder

  84. Things I never thought I’d hear myself say-

    “Cleo! Stop licking the caulk!”

    Lula’s last blog post..Fear

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