Turning into a cat lady. Literally.

So, my friend sent me a picture of me with cats all over my head and it turns out that there’s an app that lets you paste cat’s faces over any flaws you want to hide.  I find it very helpful because I can hide my face and add some text and then use it to send angry messages to people I don’t like.

Here are a few of my favorites:

catface1

bloggesscatface 2

catface3

Related: Victor says this is all a bit creepy and would like me to stop texting him unsettling cat pictures.  Too late, Victor.  I can’t be stopped now.

catface

PS.That last one was a bit creepy even for me.  Sorry about that.

130 thoughts on “Turning into a cat lady. Literally.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. OH MY GAWD!!!! Now I have a way to print those dreaded family portraits and NOT hate them! Seriously, this is glorious. All photographers should offer this option. “Which cat should your mother-in-law be?” “The one with resting bitch face, obviously.” “How about your brother?” “Do you have a cat that is drunk and out of work?” Seriously. A killing! These folks would make a killing!

  2. That last one. I can’t stop looking at it. And it’s looking right back at me. At least it’s not bedtime….

  3. Oh my gosh! I MUST do this! Thanks for giving me something else to distract me from cleaning the house! 🙂

  4. Where I live (also the South but not Texas) it’s more typical to say “Bless your little heart” in a patronizing way. The additon of “little” gives it an extra zing. Just thought I’d share that so the next time you can write or say the phrase as, “Bless your stupid little heart”. It just sounds better. In my opinion…

  5. Wow…just downloaded it. Another way to waste time at work! My boss would like a work with you by the way.

  6. “What sort of fuckery is this” has just become my new go-to when my kid does something truly knuckle-headed. Thank you.

  7. Victor is just jealous that he didn’t use the cat app FIRST! I hope you can get past his jealousy of your greatness!

  8. Once again, your brilliance has reduced me to silently giggling at a most inappropriate time. You rock my world Miss Jenny, and I can’t thank you enough.

  9. The most difficult decision I will make today is which one of these will be my new avatar. It’s fucking hard!

    It won’t be the last one LOL that looks like one of the aliens from Falling Skies. Then again, maybe I shouldn’t discount it so soon. Hmmmmmm

  10. Ever since I was a kid, that Napolean joke has been my favorite. I’m going to be 50 years old in a few days, and I still say sleevies instead of sleeves.

  11. The last one looks 1/3 Bloggess, 1/3 cat, and 1/3 chihuahua. Which is just wrong. Especially if you pronounce the last one chy-hoo-a-hoo-a.

  12. I’m so happy my friend Mari introduced your website to me. You are so, so freaking funny! Thank for sharing your humor, your humanity and your wonderful family with us. Can’t wait to read your next book! Much success and happiness to you and those you love.

  13. Thank you – the rest of my afternoon will now be occupied turning family into felines.

  14. Thank you! The rest of my afternoon will now be occupied with turning family into felines.

  15. LOL, too good. Though I agree that, even by your standards, the last one is a little too X-Files.

  16. The last pic is the best. I bet you can’t wait to go to Yale. They are Dog People, but they will understand.

  17. I am so in love with this. I also have a Social Justice Kitten calendar from Liartown USA which makes the cats say the funny as well. Why can’t I or the Internet get enough of this?

  18. I would not have thought that anything could make me smile right now, let alone laugh hysterically. Thank you!! Off to download!!

  19. Can I use one of these as my facebook profile pic? I don’t know if I need the gin or the B.S. one more! Thanks for sharing your weird.

  20. Because of you, Jenny, I can now allow pictures of myself again. Thank you. Because the cats all look young and thin and healthy!

  21. This amuses me because my 25 year old daughter (aka Big Kid) used these hashtags last night on a Facebook post she wrote about how weird it was for her to be single when everyone she knows is getting married and having babies – ‬ ‪#‎crazycatladywithoutthecatsbecauseiamallergic‬ ‪#‎ihaveplantsinstead‬ ‪#‎andadeadfishinthefreezer

  22. This is so awesome! I might have to write about it for my German peeps! And your captions make the whole thing more than hilarious, Jenny 😀

  23. “Bitch, I will fucking end you” got me good, but the same pic with “She doesn’t even go here” was unmitigated genius. Absolutely brilliant.

  24. Oh come on Victor, Jenny with Cat heads and those captions are hilarious. Best ever 😀 The expressions on ‘her’ face are gold.

  25. Oh come on Victor, Jenny with Cat heads and those captions are hilarious. Best ever 😀 The expressions on ‘her’ face are gold. Pure gold.

  26. That last one looks exactly like our new friend Caitlyn! Or maybe that Vanity Fair cover is branded into my eyeballs, forever.

  27. This is amazing. I love them ALLLLLL !!!!!! The last one is still creeping me out. But in a good way! 🙂

  28. I’m having a rough day, what with the anxiety and depression and all that stuff, and this made me smile a real smile, even with the last creepy cat, so…thank you. even if my mind is so foggy I had to read the Napoleon joke twice….

  29. Thank you for this. I didn’t think I could smile today, but you came through for me like you always do.

  30. Gin WOULD be nice. I’d like some, too, please. Please?

    These are fantastic! I love them. 🙂 I think I need to check out that app…

  31. As I sit and giggle at these, my cat sneezed and got snot in my eye…..CAT SNOT IN MY EYE!!!

  32. Laughing so hard I’m CRYING!

    Note to self: If you’re going to illegally surf FB during work do not read Jenny’s posts.
    Love,
    Me

  33. I can only imagine the nightmares that plague Victor. And I am pretty sure that you will soon have real giant cat heads and large Big Chief tablets for captions. Which, at about 3 a.m. will be awesome.

  34. As a Crazy Cat Lady, I probably need this. Or it could it somehow translate as comments on student work. “If your paper smells like cat butt then…”

  35. Hahahahaha! So great! Thank you Jenny. Bless your stupid little heart – oodles!

  36. My husband tells me the Napoleon joke at least once a week. And still I love him. I shove a cat picture (or actual cat) in his face with at least the same frequency. No wonder I love you and your blog. Turns out you are a nice mix of both of us!

    Keep up the good work and never change.

  37. I hope they called the app “Impurr-fections”. I just saw that you provided a link to the app… I refuse to click it, as I will be forced to change my joke.

  38. It took me an embarrassingly long time to get the Napoleon joke. Although I am the same person who took an hour to figure out the bumper sticker Visualize Whirled Peas.

  39. Made me shoulder pump laugh- it’s late and I’m supposed to be quiet right now. Love the dodgy black outs too! And Napoleon … sweet little Napoleon.

  40. It’s disturbing. The last one is how I actually picture Jenny when I read some of her posts. A little bit creepy, but in a way that’s hilarious.

  41. Oh good lord, you’re cracking my shit up. You can text me creepy cat pics any day. (Or you know, share them on your blog. One of those. 🙂

  42. Pretty sure I was channeling the second kitty last night when some his-momma-loves-him bless-his-heart fine specimen of a human in an oversized-even-for-Texas truck cut me off at the gas station.

  43. Can I please, PLEASE, make a poster of the cat saying “Bitch, I will fucking END you”? Or maybe “Bless your stupid heart.” I need these things. For my office door. So students stop coming to see me. Or keep coming but know what the deal is. Either way is good.

  44. Darling woman!! Bless your pea picking heart and everything else. Thanks for keeping me sane. Will you please make a t-shirt with the “What sort of fuckery is this?” comment/photo on it? PLEASE?!?! Looking forward to your visit to Seattle in November.

  45. Oh, I really needed that!

    Most of those are now saved in my “awesome pictures” folder on my phone. They will randomly appear in my friends’ inboxes, Facebook comments, etc. I know, it’s silly. But it’s fun and keeps us smiling on days when smiles are hard to come by.

  46. Years ago, when my boys were young, I edited a photo of me holding my young son. I took my head, shrunk it down and put it on my son’s body. Then, I took my son’s head, enlarged it, and put it on my body. So I had a fully grown son with a baby head holding a baby with a grown man head. It was awesome.

  47. Oh no the photos disappeared! I emailed the link to my friend and she’s all mkay where are all the cat heads you promised…

  48. I laughed so hard I cried. Napoleon’s armies made me snort! An yes, that last one….

  49. I’m a dunderhead… I downloaded it and can’t figure out how to make it work. 🙁

  50. Absolutely fucking glorious. I’m sort of migrating to my cat’s fb page instead of mine (don’t judge. It’s a long story) and a picture of me with her furious ‘leave me the fuck alone or I will end you’face on my shoulders might just be a perfect way to leave my own profile…

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