So yesterday I woke up to this:
Some of the hail was big as baseballs and now there are some holes in the side of my house and roof looks like crap but we’re safe and had a lot less damage than some of our neighbors.
When I was taking pictures of the damage I found this:
And I was very excited that I would be immortalized forever (or at least my nipples would be) because obviously I would name them after myself and whenever there was a freak storm people would be like, “Bring the cat in or she’ll be knocked out by Jenny Lawson’s Nipples!” but then scientists on twitter were like, “Those were already discovered” so that was disappointing. But the nice thing is that normally this would shatter my nerves and I was…kind of okay? So maybe it’s a sign that the TMS is working more than I thought.
Then Victor decided to run with the baseball theme and take advantage of me being able to leave the house so we took Hailey to her first baseball game. And it was lovely except that there was a taco there and I thought his head looked like a clitoris and Hailey was like, “WHAT. It’s clearly a hot dog.” And I was like, “Why would a hot dog be in a taco?” and she gave me a look like, “WHY WOULD A CLITORIS BE IN A TACO?” so I decided to ask the taco himself and he can’t talk but he mimed his flabbergastedness very well and for so long that a small child finally came up to comfort him. Then he gave Victor the “Go with God, my son” gesture which seemed an overreaction but maybe was kind of fair.
(Also, I assure you there were no small children around when I asked him about his clitoris, although technically I think it’s good for kids to be more aware of medical terms because even spellcheck has it underlined like, “What’s a ‘clitoris’? I don’t think that even exists.”
You’re part of the problem, spellcheck.
And as the sun set and the fireworks exploded I realized that maybe I’m going to be okay after all. And that I probably won’t be allowed back at the baseball game ever again.
And on an entirely different subject, it’s time for the Sunday wrap-up!
Shit I made in my shop (Named “EIGHT POUNDS OF UNCUT COCAINE” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):
This week’s wrap-up is brought to you by The Seeker’s Dungeon. Guest writers are wanted for the new blogging event over at The Seeker’s Dungeon. You need not be a blogger, just have a story to tell. The new event, From Darkness to Light, is about sharing how you turned a trauma or tribulation into motivation in following your own life’s purpose. By sharing our stories we can inspire others while remembering that we are not alone. Add your voice!