250 thoughts on “Sometimes it’s hard

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  1. Amazing to be ahead of yourself, oh wait, was that behind yourself? Never mind, awesome either way!!

  2. I’m having a tough time right now. The country is a shitshow and my depression seems to go on.
    And on. And on.
    Wishing you a day

  3. Whatever it is, Jenny, there’s a veritable army of us out here sending you strength.

  4. I am looking at my disgusting house, scratching at flea bites because we have been invaded by flea treatment resistant fleas. And Here I am. Online and too broken today to do anything about it. I feel defeated. My friends are telling me it’s ok. They’ll host D&D at their house. And I feel defeated. My ex is going to try to take my home that I worked over 30 years to earn, and I’m feeling defeated. And scared. And All I can do right now is look at my disgusting home and the fleas and maybe today I’ll get enough energy to give the dog a flea bath. And that will have to be enough. And tomorrow. Tomorrow I’ll try again.I have to. People I love want me to be here. And I want to be here. And I want to get back to those good feelings I had before stuff came crashing down around me. I’ll get there. I have to. And I hope you’ll be there too. <3

  5. Yep. I’m right there too. I’m sorry we’re dealing with this. It is HARD right now.

  6. It’s okay. Stuff is hard. We’ll be here to read it when you can do it.

  7. Sometimes it’s somebody else’s turn to be the light in the dark. Put on some good music (I recommend The Steel Wheels “Wild As We Came Here” album), sit down, put a pet in your lap, and just exist. We’ll hold up the candles until you can hold one yourself again.

  8. Take a break, breathe deeply, play with your four legged children. We are here for you.

  9. You’ve comforted your online fans hundreds of times. We can wait for you : )

  10. We understand, Jenny. We don’t have any expectations of you producing content, we are just happy when you can. Hugs!!!!!!!

  11. Hang in there. You can do this and you have soooo many of us out here supporting you.

  12. I love you for sharing your struggles, because every single human being has had a day, a week, a month or a year of feeling just like this.
    Breath, snuggle a pet, a pillow, a bag of cookies, a chocolate bar, or whatever you need to make it through this moment, and remember- you have a whole bunch of people who understand your struggles in this world who have your back and accept you just the way you are, perfectly imperfect.
    Virtual hugs to all of us who need them right now, or later on.

  13. I can’t see that Instagram post, looks like you deleted it?

    Anyway, things will get better. You will get better. I’ve heard it from you in the past, and you were right.

    Past you and present me are both telling you: it’s going to be okay. Take your time.

    Big hugs and good thoughts towards you, dear Jenny.

  14. It’s hard to want to be in our bodies when our bodies are in places like this country right now. Sending love.

  15. As ever, Jenny, thank you for reaching out through your own pain and fog. You help so many others and are so fucking OKAY it’s amazing.

  16. Thank you for sharing this with us. Wish I could just sit with you and give you some space for it to be hard. You’re right, it’s ok that we are all fucking up, and we will all get through this.

  17. This is amazing. Because we all know how you feel. We KNOW the overwhelming “grey” of everything. And we know that you are feeling like you are speaking in a monotone, and your face is grey and everything is just….dim. But as someone outside your head – that is TOTALLY not how you look to us. You still look beautiful, and shiny, and your voice and laughter (which you probably can’t even hear), is still adding light and colour to the world. Even when you can’t see it.

  18. Thank you so much for having the strength to share your weakness. I admire the FUCK outta you!

  19. You are going to get through this. It seems like it may never end but it does. nd until it does and even after I’ll be trying to send you spoons that I may have run out of but that’s okay too. Know we all love you and just want you to be your true honest self.

  20. Thank you for your rawness and transparency. This, coming from my favorite writer, is just what I needed to see to not feel so alone. We’re often told we’re not alone, but to actually see it… well, it makes us stronger. So sleep. Cry. Eat. Curl up with one of your amazing pets. Shower. Or just stare at the wall. Do whatever you need to. It’s all okay. The writing will come. The funny will come. But right now, just know you’re not alone. Just being here in your space, you are connected. Thank you for being real. <3

  21. All my love to you, Jenny.

    Things are hard, but we persist.

    I suggest listening to some Icon for Hire. They rock hard about mental health. <3

  22. I just want to give you a big hug. Or a long-distance hug, if you’re not up for hugs. All the love <3

  23. I suddenly ended up in a hole like this too and it was an awful surprise to me.
    Love you Jenny. Thank you for sharing when it’s dark and awful. It’s good to know none of us are alone.

  24. Thank you for being so honest. Thank you for trying to make all of this less scary and less stigmatizing. Hang in there.

    What is it about summer? I don’t know. I can always tell I’m sliding into depression because I start living in my head. A whole different life. A life where i don’t have to worry about everything. And everything doesn’t look so bleak. I know that I’m doing it. I know the difference. I wonder sometimes if one day I won’t. But I know I will. Things will get better. I’ll come out of this. And so will you. And so will we all. Hang in there. Sending love and strength (even if it’s from a pretend place in my head right how because the real world sucks to me at the moment.)

  25. Thank you so much for sharing this. As someone who is usually pretty good at presenting an “ok” face in the world and then coming home and feeling exactly like you describe, and then feeing crazy because why am i not ok if i was just “ok”, it’s really powerful to hear your words and have someone affirm that it’s normal and common and ok to not be ok. Whatever ok-ish looks like today is ok. You are and will be a different kind of ok tomorrow, and that’s ok too. Wishing you and us all a little more of this permission and grace and compassion.

  26. This was so valuable to me today. You will be okay, and so will I. I love u and u rule.

  27. That’s one of the bravest things I’ve ever watched/listened to.

  28. I am so sorry to hear about your depression coming back. You do so much for us. I hope you remember that YOU too are amazing, YOU are beautiful, YOU are wonderful and YOU are worthwhile! We are here for you. 🤗

  29. Listen to Just Like You by NF. There are so many people just like you. We will get through it together.

  30. Jenny, thank you from the bottom of my heart for this. This is precisely why we love you. Because you are willing to show us the hard parts. Because you share your true self with us. Sending you the hugest of hugs (if you’d like them) and all the love and good vibes to help you through. (Sending them to anyone else out there who may need them today too!!) I keep going because you, and so many of your fans, keep going. Because we’re in this together and I refuse to let you all down. Because it’s ok to not be ok, and we have to make sure everyone knows depression lies. So I keep going, and keep spreading the word, and spreading the love. Thank you, Jenny, for sharing yourself with us, and helping us know we’re all gonna be ok. Much love to all!

  31. Sending love from a 73-year old divorced woman with COPD who’s so fucking tired of the huge shitshow of our government and the elections to come and the shitting new strain of Covid that’s spreading and not being able to see my friends or even do normal things that put me too close to other human beings. Having a hard year, but you helped! You always help! So thank you. PS I just took a health pre-screening on line for an appointment for a scary new heart problem. Asked whether I was sexually active, my choices were “Yes,” “Not currently” and “Never.” Put me into that spiral — Never? Those poor people!!! Yes? No partner. Not currently? Am I never going to have sex again before I die? was the last time the actual LAST TIME? I’m laughing, but that spiral sucks.

  32. Bless you for sharing your down times, because everyone has them and can relate. But you need to remember that on those days, weeks, months, years when you COULD write, you brought unimaginable joy and laughter and insight to thousands of people, made their lives better, and caused them (me, at least) to share your books and thoughts with others who would benefit from some crazy-ass humor. Relax, recharge, rethink – or don’t think at all, just rest and know there are so many of us out here in the weeds who love and support you. XOXOXOX

  33. I love you, Jenny. You’ve helped me so many times; I wish I could help you. The best I can do is to send healing vibes and virtual hugs and hope you feel them all.

  34. This sucks so hard. You are amazing with your honesty and vulnerability and bravery. Riding it out is so very, very exhausting. I hope you find the other side soon. Sending much love and respect

  35. I am so sorry you are feeling like this. And so very grateful that you have the strength to share your struggle with us. Your compassion and quiet determination to move forward helps me know that I can get through awful days as well. Sending love and spoons.

  36. Thank you for your courage in sharing that while it’s so raw. Take care of yourself and know that you are ok just where you are right now.

  37. BIG HUG!!! It’s been a rough month. I’m right there with you. Things will get better! <3

  38. This must have been so hard to post, but thank you for sharing it. I’ve been going through a lot too and it’s good to hear someone say it’ll get better, and that I’ll get better. We’re both amazing people and we are worthy of love, even if all we did today was survive. Someone pretty great said, Depression lies. Those are some wise words; they’ve gotten me through a lot of tough situations, and they’ll get me through this one too.
    In the meantime, here’s a virtual hug.

  39. Love you, girl. We will help you through this, the parts you need us and cheering on the parts you already got. Hang in there. Eat the chocolate. Drink the wine. Pet the cat. And come back when you’re OK.

  40. Just watched. All my love to you. You look like I often feel. Remember that depression lies. Also remember that you have given, and continue to give, the gift of comforting so many of us who thought that we were alone.

  41. That was an amazing share and made me want to reach out to hug you, so consider yourself hugged, virtually of course! Unless your not a hugger, then that would be creepy to force a virtual hug and in that case I’ll just stammer an apology and walk away quickly. lol Thank you for being there and being you

  42. I am in the middle of a 3 year depression and it’s literally been kicking my ass almost every day, and I cannot even remember anyone’s name much less what I did last week for work. So I’m looking like an idiot every damn day at work. I just finished a 3 person meeting one of whom was my nemesis. And I looked like an idiot. And I’m exhausted from having covid 3 weeks ago and I’m terrified ill never be ok. And somehow, my eyesight deteriorated rapidly in 3 weeks so I’m switching back and forth between different glasses and I just feel like sisyphus.

  43. I’m bipolar and a recovering alcoholic so I feel like I have a lot of difficult days. I don’t know if this will help but when I have a bad day I will do one of two things—help others or write a gratitude list. Oh, and I pray and meditate.

    Some days are harder than others and some days I just feel like giving up but if I can live in gratitude for what I have, my life suddenly seems better.

    You are amazing. You are talented. You are a magical creature.

    There are days when I accomplish a lot and I feel good. There’s other days when I look around at the dishes in the sink, the clutter, and the mess the dog made and I could just scream. But that’s okay…
    It’s sometimes about perception. At least that’s what I’m told. I will eventually muster the will to clean, the will to call someone else and let it all out, and the will to help someone else.

    Be kind to yourself today.

  44. Yes. This. You just illustrated one of the things I like to tell my people: “Help” is a complete sentence. You don’t have to know how this happened or how to resolve it or even be able to explain what “it” is – you get to just raise the white flag and say, “this sucks and I don’t want to be here, but I am” and be cared for. Good for you for writing about the same thing twice in different ways. Every non-fiction writer I know has done that – I’ve found Word documents on my computer that are so damn similar to something else I wrote six months before or two years ago. Sending love and comfort your way.

  45. Good day/bad day, descending into/deep into/climbing out of depression, you are awesome and we’re lucky to have you in our lives.

  46. We love you Jenny. You’re right, It is gonna get better. You’re here for us; we’re here for you. ❤️

  47. Even if none of the things work I want to give you a hug. I want to hug you when I read your work and when I share it with my teenager and watch it help her sort herself and when I read it and it helps me sort myself out and I’m so sorry you’re having a hard time right now. We all love you and are here thinking of you. I don’t know if it helps or not, I hope it does, but we’re here either way.

  48. Thank you so very much for being brave enough to record and post this! I needed to hear and see someone tell me I’ll be OK. You’re right. You are the very bestest of the bests! Take loving care of yourself!

  49. For anyone going through a hard time right now readying this I’m sending you a big hug and positive vibes. You are not alone and you are perfect just they way you are. You are beautiful brave strong and amazing. Your own brain is trying to kill you yet you keep fighting. That is the bravest thing I know. You deserve happiness, love and the best things in life. You may not believe me but that doesn’t make what I’m saying any less true. Keep fighting you make this world a better place

  50. I love you so hard, Jenny. You are wonderful and smart and borken in the best possible way.

  51. A stranger on the internet just told me that I’m going to be okay and it made… well, it didn’t make it all better, but it made it suck LESS. Love you too, Jenny. It IS going to get better.

  52. In the midst of your terrible depression, you stop to help others who may be feeling similarly. We’ll be looking for you when you come out to the other side, {{{HUGS}}}

  53. Thank you so much for this. I read what you write and it often touches me; sometimes in my funny boy, more often in the parts of me that suffer from bipolar, depression, and anxiety. Seeing you, hearing you, really helps. I’m currently distracting myself (somewhat) from a major ptsd panic flareup, and there you were, in my inbox.
    we love you. thank you for you.

  54. Love you, Jenny. Sending you the warmest, cyber hug. So many of us are just holding on, waiting for better days. Thank you for posting this.

  55. This was a beautiful post. Thank you for being so open and vulnerable. We’ll still love you whether your brain is working any given day or not. So many of us know what you feel like.

  56. Some days it’s all I can do to make it to bed that night. And then I wake up and do it for that day… We’re with you Lady!

  57. I needed this so much today. I want to play it on a loop all day long. In a deep pit myself, struggling with the grief of my husband’s death and trying to work, but my head won’t let me think. I am where you are and thank you for reminding me that I will come out of this. Sending love and hugs….and HUGE thanks for your bravery.

  58. Jenny, if you never wrote another word you’d have done more to help people than an awful lot of mental health professionals. As you like to say “You are enough”. And you are. Content like this is so important because it helps remind us that you’re not just our hilarious prophet; making our pain bearable by making it funny (way to dispel our boggarts for us). You’re also a person, who is dealing with deep and recurring depression. It helps us remember that you have pain and your pain isn’t funny in the moment. It’s only funny after you’ve curated it for us. So thank-you for everything you’ve given us and please remember when the depression is lying to you that there are literally millions of people who use your words to hold on to another day. You are awesome. Don’t forget it.

  59. Thank you, Jenny. You’re always so good at giving us a laugh, but what you’ve done here is also SO important and helpful and lovely.

    I’m in the middle of a very long bout of the worst depression I’ve ever had. The first time my depression has severely impacted my ability to function at anything more than a very basic level. It’s impacting my work, my health, my ability to care for my wife with dementia, and my desire to do anything.

    Took me nearly two years to seek help. I was already on an antidepressant to help reduce the severity of my hot flashes (not a candidate for HRT). So, I just kept struggling. Now, working with our clinic’s medical manager and a counselor, I’ve just been prescribed an increased dose of antidepressant, along with ADHD meds. ADHD was nowhere on my radar. Still kind of not sure it’s “me,” but I scored so high on the screening questions, and I’m so dysfunctional going on so many months now, I have to explore it and see.

    Anyway, we see so much of your incredible successes, and I’m always wondering how on earth you’re able to do *any* of it. Somehow, it’s reassuring to see the reality of the depression pits and know that you’ve always been so good at climbing out of them. Gives me hope. Which depression immediately stomps on…

    ; )

    (side note: found out that low estrogen impacts ADHD symptoms; these worst two years of depression happen to follow my complete hysterectomy — including removal of ovaries. I was not sad at all about having the surgery — never had kids; never wanted kids; was already in menopause. I never “looked” like ADHD, and still don’t. But there’s an “inattentive” type of ADHD that you don’t tend to see in most descriptions, which are based primarily on male children. Just a thought for other women out there wondering where their ability to function at a normal level has gone to after menopause — yes, it could be the need of hormone replacement, it could be depression, it could be many things; but don’t shrug off the possibility of ADHD that you’ve masked and managed and has only just now become undeniable.)

  60. Sending you so much love…you are never alone. Not only does depression lie, it steals your favorite hair ties and takes a bite out of every chicken nugget on your plate. But it can’t dim your wonderful light.

  61. Let’s just all fall apart together. But since many of us don’t like to socialize, also separately. You are not alone.

  62. First of all- BIG GIANT HUGS- you are an amazing human for so many reasons, but for this one thing alone- sharing your pain and letting others see what depression really looks like- how many ways it looks and shows up- for this ONE thing, you are forever and always in whatever good place exists in the cosmos, cause it takes guts and strength and vulnerability and love to share this and be real and raw for all the people out there who need to see this. Either because they have loved ones with depression and they don’t get it or for those with depression who need to know they are so far from alone…you are a goddamned hero Jenny! Love you, love you, love you! 😘😘❤️❤️

  63. I really needed to hear that today so thank you. I hope you took your own words to heart and know that I would say them back to you.

  64. Even though it can be hard to see the truth through the grey gauze that depression throws over us, here are some truths that we will see for you until your eyes clear and the gloom lifts:

    1. You are so, so strong, even when you don’t think you are.
    2. You are brave beyond words for sharing this. Your courage in just being yourself gives others courage to keep on keeping on even when things are very, very difficult.
    3. You have a kind and generous soul, and its beautiful light shines through even in the darkest times. Believe it, because others see it even when you can’t.
    4. When things feel dark, know that you have only one immediate concern, and that is taking care of YOU. Be as patient and gentle and kind to yourself as you would be to a person you love when they are hurting.You deserve nurture. Everything else can go on hold for a while. Just rest and heal.That is what matters, and everyone who matters understands that.

    Sending you hugs and endless thanks. You make the world a better place every day just by being in it.

  65. Sending love to all of you today. Also I really love when the community makes lists of recommend books…you could totally just fill the two pages with those this month, an epic list of loved books from loving people xxx

  66. Hugs and thank you for this. It has been a struggle lately – momentous birthday coming up (65) with all of its accompanying life changes. I’m handling it much worse than I thought I would. Add in the state of the country and world and my depression seems more intractable than usual. We’ll get through it – but here’s hoping our brains get their shit together soon!

  67. Jenny,

    As much as it helps those of us who have depression to see your courage in the midst of your own depression, I think people who don’t have depression need to see it even more. There are still so many people who are trying to understand mental illness, but just don’t get it.

    My own has been unrelenting and worsening for many years now — enough to count in decades — and it is wearing on the people who care about me (family, friends, doctors). And I feel so guilty for the way my illnesses drag them down.

    If you would scoot over a little (maybe just a little more; thanks), I’ll bring a chair and keep you company in your pit for a while. I’d like to offer support and express gratitude for the support you extended today (and other days) to the rest of us. We can sit in silence or chat about the best ways to decorate a depression pit (is it better to have lights or do we need the peace of darkness? What about some glow-in-the-dark stickers? The furniture should be soft, in case we bump into it when we have to go to the bathroom).

    As others have mentioned, the world outside my head gives me little reason to be anything BUT depressed. “Depressive realism” — is that the term? — isn’t really a blessing. I’d like my rose-coloured glasses now, please.

    Thank you, Jenny. You are a light even when you feel at your darkest. I send love and admiration.

    Ruth

    P.S. Sometime, could Victor write a guest post about how to be a spouse to someone with mental illness? How to support one’s spouse and how to survive the effects of that person’s illness?

  68. Thank you for this. I needed to hear it. I’m in a depression, have a bad case of PMS, and am going through a raging RA flare. It’s been a fucked up week. I’ve gone through my entire savings waiting to get on disability, and am behind on everything. It feels like nothing will ever get better, but I hope it will. Thanks for the reminder that it probably will.

  69. I needed this more than I realized. My anxiety & depression is holding me back in procrastination & blocking ways. From one Jen to another you are ok. I hope you realize you needed sharing too.

  70. Jesus christ watching that video was like putting a mirror up to my own face. The pit sucks but slowly and surely we will climb back up. Thank you for putting words, even if not written, to the those feelings

  71. Good vibes from Maryland. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this, but you ARE amazing and brilliant and funny. And as you say, you will get through this.

  72. Thank you for your honesty and vunerability. It always helps me to hear from someone else who is in the same boat.

    The HSM Depression sucks, btw. No fancy meal carts, and the water is always choppy.

    But the trip will end, and the sunlight off the pier is always fantastic, and so much brighter for the darkness we endured to get there.

    So yeah, you’re not alone. We’re always here for you Jenny. We love you too! (We as in your readers. Though could also just be me and my cat. Ellie loves everyone, so she’d probably love you.)

  73. Jenny Jenny Jenny…you are not alone. I haven’t been able to write for years, except for book and movie reviews and posts on Facebook. Fiction? Memoir? Nope. But you have. You have seen the humor in so many things and you will again. I know there are other things that accompany the depression and anxiety. I don’t know which it is, probably anxiety, but sometimes I know I don’t dare try to cook because I will burn myself or spill our entire dinner on the floor or dishes will just slip out of my hand and hit our tile floor and the pieces will scatter up to ten feet away. Fun time cleaning that up, and the food, and… However it manifests for you, you will get through it. You may get mad, or sad, or feel a million things at once, but one day soon you will laugh instead. I know it. I’m rooting for you.

  74. Furiously, fucking fantastic! Truly, you are inspirational even when you say you feel depressed. Thank you! <3

  75. Ah, Jenny, you are always enough, just as you are. And kudos to Hunter for trying to share his healing vibes. I swear, cats know.

  76. You help us all to be brave enough to not only face the monster, but also to embrace it. *hugs*

  77. THANK you. And I love you back. I was just trying to write a blog post and my brain hasn’t been cooperating. Words aren’t working and when I try to read (a book) I can’t concentrate. And I can’t find my funny. Telling myself over and over that this too shall pass.

  78. I love you soooooooooooooooooooooo much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  79. Your video is very relatable and that’s exactly how it looks and feels. It IS ok, you WILL be ok, you ARE ok, but damn it is hard. You are an effing hero for being visible and honest for those of us less noticable than a famous blogger and author who hangs out with Gaiman. Love you.

  80. Thank you so much for your honesty! I feel the same right now. My brain won’t work, and I haven’t been able to go to work for a month due to Covid – Which causes more brain fog and results in depression. But we will get past this! We will, we will, we will!

  81. Sending you love and hugs. It’s all I have to spare but you’ve got it. And telling YOU that it’s OK.

  82. Thank you for sharing this. I am also struggling with my depression right now, and it is so helpful to know that I am not alone. Thank you for continuing to talk in any way you can – your messages give me so much strength. We will get through this.

  83. Thank you for sharing this. Our brains are assholes and liars and as much as I love mine, I kinda hate it sometimes too for being such an asshole.

  84. (((hugs))) love you bunches ❣️
    I really needed to hear what you said today. My depression is raging along with my body. I have a large boil, yup I said it. I see my neurologist tomorrow and am supposed to have my 3rd foot surgery on Monday. I’m in the pit with you. This too shall pass. You are fabulous and so amazing and sharing your stories and your life is a truly beautiful thing. Most of us are trying not to make eye contact!
    My friend had you sign a book of yours and I also received a note from Rusty. I’m so happy about that! It’s made my day 🙏!
    We will get through this together and I’m pretty sure, like I always do too, I’ll have a hilarious story to come out of it! Love you 💕😽 Tina

  85. I think this was one of the most helpful things for me. I related so much to the thoughts and feelings. Knowing how I feel in these times and how hard it is, I have no idea how you are able to offer so much encouragement. But it just helped me a lot, this video. I’m going to bookmark it. It felt like talking to a friend that actually does understand. Thank you so much for sharing for all of us. <3 I hope you come out of this depression soon <3

  86. Thank you for posting.
    We love you just the way you are, every day.
    You’re out of bed and dressed – yay you!
    This too shall pass. You are not alone 💗

  87. Thank you for this! Today I’m feeling huge imposter syndrome. I mean everyone tells me I’m great at my job and I do have quite a few years of experience. But there are days when my brain says, “How did you get this job? You have no idea what you’re doing. Someday they’re going to figure out what a loser you are.” I know I’ll get past it.

  88. Wow. Thank you. I suffer from bouts of depression as well. Combine that with a physical injury and having to Fight the healthcare system and the insurance system, and sometimes I’ve actually felt that the universe was trying to tell me to die because it felt like no one wanted to help me. Fortunately, I am also lucky enough to have resources and I’m too stubborn to hurt myself because I want to see what comes next in the world and be here as long as I can to enjoy my almost adult children. But it’s really hard sometimes, and I appreciate you sharing your vulnerability. I’m already a huge fan and I have all your books. I am in awe of your writing. Thank you for everything.

  89. I am sorry the depression came back for the time being.

    I do think your story will be funny for you one day soon.

    I see a t-shirt: Remember the time I didn’t remember I wrote an article TWICE…? And unlike wine, it got WORSE with time!

    Or maybe: Wait, did I write this already?

  90. Sorry you’re feeling this way, Jenny. How brave of you to share it. I know it’s helping others. I’m glad you know (even if you don’t feel it) that you’re okay and you’ll get through it.

  91. That’s what Brave looks like. Sharing your vulnerability gives so many people hope ❤️

  92. I needed this right now, very badly, though I had no idea that I did until I heard you say it.

    You are a light in my darkness, and have been more times than I can count. So I’m sending light back to you. I hope you see it.

  93. Oh, Jenny. 💗💖💗 I had a GREAT week in June, and I was able to hold onto that for a bit, wishing that I could feel like that all the time. Then things went downhill, and I hit a low last week. I was a mess, but I’m coming out of it now. So as always, thank you for sharing. Love you lots.

  94. Jean at #52, Cassie at #98 and Dawn at #120. Sending you all big hugs. I hear you. Five autoimmune disorders here, disabled from counseling and teaching, and so very tired of having to convince others that, yep, I deserve to be alive despite being tattered and creaky.

    This has been a long, awfully lonely road, made tougher lately by having to almost completely isolate due to immunosuppressant meds. I’m one more bad home haircut (omg the horrible bangs!!!) away from just shaving my head, and I think I’ve gone partially feral. Yesterday I was looking out my my front window and the postal delivery person dropped my mail in the wallbox on my porch, glanced in and did a shocked double take, then scurried off the porch. I realized that I was standing there, accidentally in my sight of the window in my granny panties, Clash t-shirt, and fuzzy slippers, with one side of my hair braided, a cat slung over my shoulder, and an entire sleeve of Ritz crackers in my fist. That’s what my 11 a.m. looks like these days.

    Still, we are fighters, ladies.

    I’m thankful that all of us are here.

    We matter.

  95. Thank you for this message. I’ve been fairly well since 2020 but very suddenly a few weeks ago, what seemed at first like it was going to be just a few off days, has morphed into a relapse of depression. Some of my functioning never did come back from the long episode prior but I’m having trouble articulating my thoughts, the overwhelm & feeling of dread is seeping back in and I am soooo hoping I don’t lose my creativity again as I have projects I really want to finish.

  96. Jenny, maybe we are aliens. It is hard. Maybe we are empathetic. Maybe we are empathetic bitches. Who knows? Just read the study that serotonin is a lie. Whatever.
    WE ARE LOVED AND WE LOVE ONE ANOTHER. Isn’t that all that matters?

  97. Jenny,
    You have impeccable timing. This is JUST what I needed to hear today. Thank you so much for sharing this part of your journey with all of us.
    Today: I’m living the dream b/c I survived the day today. Fuck ups and all.
    Also – that 4 hour nap really helped.
    Sincerely,
    Singed in St. Paul

  98. Jenny, we love you. I am sorry for you to have to be going thru this again. I am so grateful to have you in my life, in all our lives, because you make it real. Real, raw, and.. beautiful. I cried with you. Been a hard few weeks here for me as well. We’ll get there.

  99. It is ok! Lots of love from a stranger who thinks you’re wonderful, and whose life is richer because of you.

  100. Jenny you are Amazing, Beautiful, Empathetic, Brave, Strong and so much more! We can do Hard things! Sending you Love and light and hugs to get through the sad days💓💓💓💓

  101. Sending you loads of love and healing energy. I am struggling with that damn black dog right at the moment myself. I am so not willing to go back on anti-depressants. Keep on being you, you are much loved by many!

  102. We’re all gonna be okay. God I needed this today. I’m sorry you’re going through it too but so glad you decided to share.

  103. Well fuck, this was exactly what I didn’t know I needed today. Sending SO many hugs and love to you, I just want to hug you and tell you how much it means to see this and to hear your words and… I don’t know how to describe it. I’m struggling bad right now but it’s more my anxiety than the depression, and yunno, logically I know other people are struggling with the same things and I’m not alone and etc etc but actually seeing you talk about it while it’s going on… It hit differently. Thank you.

  104. We wait it out, because we know we won’t always feel like this. Eat cookies, stare at the wall, keep breathing. Take your meds. Don’t give up. Keep breathing. Hugs.

  105. Felt every second of that in my core. It’s nice to know you’re not alone, even though I wish none of us ever had to feel this way. Just wanted to tell you I feel that so hard & I love you loads. Always remember that what you do is so important!

  106. Sending you love. I can empathize totally and feel ridiculously close to you after watching that.

    Nothing can stop you because you are a magic skeleton packed with MEAT and powered by ELECTRICITY and IMAGINATION. You have a cave in your face filled with sharp bones and five tentacles at the end of each arm. You can do ANYTHING, MAGIC SKELETON!

  107. I love you Jenny. And thank you for this. Thank you for sometimes just hanging on for all of us. ❤️

  108. Thank you. It IS going to be ok. And you ARE worthy. And so am I. Love you. ♥️♥️♥️

  109. Hang in another day, we’re all rooting for you! It also doesn’t help that this dang Texas heat is scrambling our brains.

  110. “I’m not in charge of my head enough to write.” ♥️ When you can’t do what helps you cope with depression how the fuck do you get out of the depression. Depression is some kind of special bullshit for sure.

    Sending you hugs and love and permission to say you just can’t right now.

  111. You are so brave and vital to this world. It is so frustrating not feeling normal and thankful and happy when that’s all we want to be. You are perfect just as you are. Depressed and scatter brained at the moment but absolutely the greatest person. We understand you! Hugs 🤗

  112. While depressed you are so loving towards yourself and others, way more than I can be one even when I’m not depressed.

  113. You’re very brave to share this, Jenny. Sending love and light your way. Here’s to making your way back out of the darkness and into the light.

  114. Jenny – You are beautiful and awesome and we all love you so much. Thank you for sharing this and for being such an amazing person. Even when you experience a low point, you help people just by being you, by being honest and vulnerable and sharing what is going on. It helps decrease stigma and it helps people to know they are not alone. You are right – you will get through this, everyone needing to hear your wisdom and encouragement can also get through this, and it truly **can** be a major accomplishment if all one did today was to exist. I am a psychiatrist (who has depression & ADHD) and I wish I could reach out and hug you. (Well, really on the surface I am wishing I could reach out and offer you some amazing treatment that would bring this depressive episode to an end, but that’s really just my fantasy way of comforting myself because it sucks to see someone I care about having to hurt right now. But really, the most healing thing in this moment probably **would** be a hug. So, I hope you can imagine yourself receiving a big warm hug from me and all the rest of your amazing internet support community, and I hope you can feel it, at least a little.) (Argh, it is so tempting to ask “have you tried this treatment, that treatment, this med, that med” but there’s nothing more annoying that having an anonymous self-appointed internet know-it-all giving you lame suggestions that you have probably already tried, so I will trust that you are in good hands with whomever is treating you and just sit here on the sideline and root for you instead.) Be kind to yourself (I think you are) and give yourself whatever time and space you need to get through this. We love you and are rooting for you and will be right here whenever you are up to sharing more with us.

  115. You have no idea how much I needed this today. Like seriously needed this. Thank you for being real in the best possible way. You will get better. There is always hope even on days when it does not feel like it.

  116. “The link you have followed may be BROKEN”?! I thought that shit was on purpose.

    Trying to break out of what I’ve been calling a funk. Sending positive energy to all in the tribe who could use a little bit too. Maybe it will be absorbed and sent out again like little prisms and we’ll make a whole network of positivity and rainbows

  117. Sending you so much love and so many hugs. You are amazing and I am grateful I found your books and you.

  118. Jenny, I love that you are sharing this in the moment. I always figure out I was depressed after I’m working my way out of it, and for some reason I am always surprised! Like “wow I was depressed! Was that the first time or the 12th time or …??
    Thank you as always Jenny.

  119. You are fabulous. You help so many people, more than you’ll ever know. I’m one of them.

  120. Jenny, you have helped me so much with the phrase “Depression lies.” I hope you feel better soon and I know you will eventually, because when we know that depression lies and we hang on, we do get better.
    Remind yourself that you have gotten through 100% of the depressions before now.

  121. Mental illness has never been my personal battle, but MAN am I struggling right now. It’s hard to navigate the world right now, and I know it’s 1000% harder if you have a brain that lies to you.

    Be kind to yourself, Jenny. You’ve gotten through this before and you’ll do it again. And as hellish as I know it is, your openness and honesty about the hard times helps others. You are loved and appreciated. Keep holding on.

  122. Lots of love, lots of grace. 💕 To you, to me, to anyone who needs it.

  123. It’s comforting to know we’re all in this together. You’re beautiful inside and out and I, for one, appreciate your naked honesty. Peace.

  124. Thank you for sharing that; I know it wasn’t easy and I hope this bout of depression you’re in passes quickly. I really needed to hear that it’s okay if I’m fucking everything up because it feels like I really am, and I have various health problems and am overwhelmed with a lot of different things and I don’t know how to fix any of it, but I know somehow it’ll be okay because really there’s nothing I can do about most of it anyway. So thank you for the reminder. 💕

  125. Enormous hugs from Australia. I was where you are 5 months ago, I see your truth and I admire your strength so much. The day I could brush both my teeth and my hair in the same day I felt superhuman. Tell that local rag to goddamn publish your second article, because there will be other people out there that haven’t caught up with your first one or lost it or had the cat throw up on it or was crying all day that day or threw it out because it was too much effort to carry it in from the footpath, and who needs new anyway? – these are the books that made such an impression you wrote about them twice! Wrapping you with warm thoughts.🌈☀️🌈☀️🌈☀️

  126. Oh Jenny, I see you. I feel you. My heart is with you. You can do this. Even when words are hard. You’ve got this. Love and hugs!

  127. Thank you. I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that. Sending you so much love and many virtual hugs.

  128. I love you, my American friend. Thank you for sharing your youness. Xxxxx

  129. Thank you for sharing that, Jenny.

    I wrote a whole paragraph here about how awfully I treat myself but I deleted it because god forbid I let strangers on the internet see how weak and stupid I am. Jesus. Suffice to say, I’m a mess and I’m sorry you’re feeling messy, too. It is a deeply, deeply unfun way to feel.

  130. Thank you for having the courage to post this. I hear you. You will get through this, it will get better. One day / hour at a time. Speed is not important. You are awesome. Sending love and light

  131. You are not alone! You said those exact words to me several years ago and saved my life. I’m sure you’ve saved countless others. *HUGZ*

  132. Lawd have mercy I feel all of this to my core. We love you Jenny, I love you, you are our Blogess and we, I am crying with you and for you and this will get better. Even when our brain says it won’t, this too shall pass.

  133. Jenny – sending hugs and lots of healing thoughts you’re way. Thank you for sharing your reality and your struggles. You got this and you WILL come out of this…. Be kind to yourself 💗.

  134. I feel like I need to hear this every morning before I leave the bed. Thank you Jenny. Your words are like a balm on my heart. Depression feels so lonely and it makes you feel so worthless and bad at everything. Your video reminded me that I’m not alone and that I can keep going and there will be an end to this. It gave me hope.

  135. Oh, Jenny, thank you for sharing such a raw reflection. Sending random stranger hugs to you. This forgetfulness has been my life lately, and it makes me feel like an idiot. I hear you.

  136. You survived today and you made people feeling similar things feel less alone. Big hugs.

  137. You are the bravest, strongest person I know. You ARE going to get through this, and so am I. Thank you for reminding me of that.

  138. You have no idea how much we needed this…. im in the darkness too … biggest healing hugs … we love you xxx

  139. Oh I’m sorry you’ve got another round of your Dark Passenger (if you’ve ever watched Dexter) coming around. Although Dexter’s was a bit more… demanding? I know those days when the big accomplishments were that “Hey… I got out of bed and put on some clothes!” I was admittedly tickled and profoundly sympathetic about you re-writing your article and while the first one might have been better, if you’re like me, it can be a weird consolation to go back to something, realize that you’ve already done it and I think to myself “Well at least I’m consistent”. Know this too… rewriting the same article isn’t the “worst” thing that could happen… many MANY many years ago I lived in a house with four or five other people and one day a mutual friend of ours who had a small catering business showed up offering us a bounty of fresh, untouched catering food for something like at least fifty people. The poor guy had made a complete catering meal for an event, but for the wrong date and the actual event wasn’t for another week. So his consolation instead of dumping it, was to gift us with so much more food than we could eat but I’ll tell you this… having a ton of his lemon bars to dive into was the best. You are not alone. 🙂

  140. You are an amazing authentic person and we love you for sharing yourself. It is okay to not be okay. It will be better this is temporary. Hugs and love

  141. Thank you so much for sharing in such a vulnerable state!! I too have such a hard time letting people know when I’m in the depths of a depression – seeing you, hearing you, being vulnerable and describing what it’s like and what you’re feeling, it’s so rare to see/hear. I know the world won’t end because of my depression, and it won’t end if I let people know I’m struggling, but it’s so damn hard when I don’t see anyone else showing how much they’re struggling too. Thank you for helping normalize the struggle!

  142. I started a new work thing that keeps me employed where I want to be, but have spent the past week getting hacked by eight different countries.
    It’s not my fault, it’s happening to others, but that voice that is yelling that I’m not worth the trouble and they are just going to fire me is getting louder and louder. I keep trying to laugh, buttt. I’m running out of blasé.

  143. Awww, Jenny. I feel you so hard. The disconnect between the *knowing* that it will get better and the feeling that you are in a pit that you can never get out of, the unworthiness, the sense of always fucking up… It’s pretty hard in the moment. My depression is somehow tied into chronic migraine, and the unpredictable bouts of physical pain, executive dysfunction and brain fog have essentially destroyed my once-thriving career and made it impossible to support myself as a renter in one of the country’s stupidly expensive regions. I didn’t love the career anyway, but finding another one that can pay the bills at my current level of function is a bit tricky. And knowing that I’ll be OK is sometimes not the same as really believing it. You’re amazing. So am I. So are we. Take care of yourself and let other folks take care of you too. We love you and the twisted fantastic light that you shine.

  144. In awe of your ability & willingness to take us along on your journeys into the darkness, Jenny. You’re a rare gem.

  145. You’re human, love, nothing but human. And yes, it will get better. Definitely 🙂

  146. Bless your heart…watching this just breaks my heart. I understand and can relate, so your pain is palpable. I know where you are and it truly hurts to see you there. If there’s any comfort at all in knowing you’re not alone, all of these posts should be reassuring. We fight our battles alone in our heads but have an army behind us. Sending much love and hopes for you to come out on the other side very soon. ❤️

  147. You have a 100% survival rate! I have a 100% survival rate! The odds are in our favor! Just not right this minute. This minute SUCKS. [But look at that survival rate. ]

  148. Hey – it’s me – #157 (who is also a psychiatrist) – with a P.S.

    I can’t find it online right now (but be sure of it’s true origin) but that image that says “Please Remember – Depression is a Lying Bastard – Life will be better again – I promise” – that’s yours, right?

    I occasionally print that thing out and hand it to a patient. Not all the time, but occasionally I think of it when it seems to be just what someone needs to hear. And, while I probably have much more of a “when-she-is-well-lighthearted-Jenny-Lawson” type vibe about me than the average psychiatrist, it’s **not at all** what someone is expecting to receive. Especially if I act all serious and “doctorly” and am like “wait a minute, don’t go yet, I need to print something out for you to read, you can take it home with you,” or whatever. So, your sign has made a number of very depressed patients crack up laughing because they sure weren’t expecting something that says “lying bastard” on it. And if I can make a depressed person laugh, even for a few seconds, that’s a major win for all of us. So, I doubt this post of mine will make you crack up laughing, but I hope maybe it will bring a little bit of a “warm fuzzy” your way to know you are even helping 2nd degree “contacts” in ways you can’t even imagine. And, if I can give you a little bit of a “warm fuzzy” today (I hope?) that is also a major win for all of us.

    (How do you like that? Psychiatrists are formally using your stuff to help their patients. Because you are that good. You should put that on your resume somewhere or something!) 😉

    Take care, as you have said, you will get through this. You are one tough cookie! We love you and are sending you happy, healing, positive vibes.

  149. You are so brave to share yourself in this moment. Thank you.

    I kept expecting one of your pets to show up so you could hold/pet them. But I do know you have wonderful support people around you that love you. What a blessing.

    Hugs from another one living with depression.

  150. Jenny, You are the therapist I have never been able to find. At this time I am in the pits as you said. My brain chatter is poison for me day and night. I turned on your video today and as you looked in to your camera felt as if you were talking directly to me. AND, you were, and I cried for you and for me. I get so stuck that I can hardly move. Thank you for your sharing.

  151. Hi Jenny and everyone. Just don’t do what I do, which is listen to sad Smiths songs and solo Morrissey songs and Bittersweet Symphony and make it worse. I also watch true crime. What the HELL is wrong with me? Oh yeah. It’s the depression thing. I love #190. So easy to remember.

  152. YO! JENNY! YOU ARE LOVED. Fuck Deadlines.

    I see your strength, and how you speak to the moment, and I am sorry for your pain, but at the same time, I am so grateful for your experience and your strength. I am forever in awe of the gift you give the world of yourself and your family.

    Covid Broke the social structure of the world. So many people I know who rely on that structure are lost right now, and when they speak to me, I hear the pain that I hear in your voice. You are the voice for so many people that you don’t even know about.

    I wonder if it will be up to all of us who never functioned within the social construct of expectations and deadlines in the first place to show everyone else how to survive without that safety net. Because it’s gone, and whatever comes next will not be the same.

    You are perfect, and you are perfectly situated to help us all climb out of the rubble and build something better and more compassionate. It’s nothing you haven’t been doing all along, and I think you know it. That said, I am sorry for the discomfort and pain that feel.

    My family loves you. We are here.

  153. “It’s alright. I promise. It’s going to get better.” Thank you for my new mantra.

  154. Thank you for telling us we’re going to be okay. I hope you can watch this yourself- because you’re right- you’re going to be okay. I’m going to be okay. And okay is enough.

  155. Thank you. I may not be wonderful but i’m stubborn and we belong to the same tribe. ❤️

  156. The pauses. I hear it all in the pauses. Thank you, thank you for reaching out to encourage in your moment of darkness. The sun will shine again.

  157. You are brave and strong and freaking fantastic. You’ll come through this. Sending love.

  158. Thank you, as always, for your beautiful words Jenny. Sending love your way. ♥️

  159. I’ve just come out of a dip, and I promise you: it will get better. I hope you watch this yourself when you’re struggling. And considering you’re in a depression, you’ve got some pretty darned hopeful words here. It’s so important for people to see this part of depression. Thank you for sharing this with the world. YOU are amazing, and it’s all right 🥰💚

  160. As we Quakers say, I’m holding you in the Light. You are a light yourself.

  161. Sending hugs and love your way Jenny! Thank you for being you and you are right — it’s going to be okay.

  162. So, so feel your pain/mood/depression. So grateful that you share. Sometimes I feel like a freak for being this way, and a kindred spirit can pull me through the muck.

  163. Today was the worst day so far in an unbelievable week. Major, big thing. Mom in the throes of a long death, in quarantine so I can’t even see her. She can’t use the phone anymore, she can’t make sense. Her heart is failing. And she begs me to come over and I try to explain why they won’t let me. Then all sorts of really painful life-or-death decisions about our dog. Things we can’t afford.

    I needed your words today more than ever. You said it so well. I needed to remember. Thank you.

  164. Your phrase “don’t believe everything you think” became my motto many a moon ago. Between that and another key paraphrase from the Carol Burnett show “on today’s episode of As The Stomach Churns”, I totally get it. Be you Jenny, we love you no matter what.

  165. Omg Jenny thank you for your message. I’m actually re-listening to ‘Furiously’ today so to hear your voice outside of your narrative is attention grabbing and real time (although it’s 12hrs later than your post) hopefull.
    You deserve a medal for your bravery.

  166. Thanks Jenny for sharing. I’ve been having about 4 years of crazy mixed with depression and yet also full of love from family and friends supporting me through The Divorce From Hell. You are brave and lovable and my world is better because I am blessed to share it with people like you. Hang in there sweetie.

  167. Thanks so much for sharing this, Jenny. It felt like watching a video of myself when I’m having a dark spell. I, too, only write or talk about it once I’m out of it. It’s 1,000 times harder to open up when you’re “in the pits,” so what a tremendous amount of courage and strength this took. I hope I share in this way myself someday.

  168. The fact you even posted that video shows strength, courage and ownership.
    You my dear are a hero in my eyes.

  169. I have depression. I haven’t had a break from it in years despite medication. I also love you and your bravery in the face of this disease. This will be a wonderful story for the next book. You have the essential facts on video so you can refer to that once you can write again. In the meantime, play with your cats and Dottie. They always bring joy.

  170. You are loved. You are perfect. You are amazing. You are my hero. <3

  171. You are so loved, Jenny. Thank you for being open and honest. Sending you good vibes for brighter days ahead.

  172. Oh honey, I love you, too. I’ve been there many times. You’re right, it’s gonna get better and you’ll come out of this. We are all here holding you up.

  173. Try saving the articles to a folder on your desktop and name them the month that you are writing about. Then it’s a quick check to see what you have to do next.

  174. Jenny you are so strong and so brave. You will get thru this and come out the other side. Thank you for showing us that it’s ok when we are in a hole like this. ❤️

  175. Thank you for this. I have felt so alone and reading your books has really helped. I have been so deep in a depression and have been moving forward and trying to be okay but feel like I fail my children every day I’m not okay and that I’m actively destroying my marriage because my husband just doesn’t get it and I don’t think he ever will so maybe it’s better if we just end it right. I wish every day my husband could speak to me and make me feel as seen and heard as I feel reading the words of a stranger. I feel hopelessly misunderstood and judged and I really needed to hear this right now. I know writing will help me (I’m also a writer) but sometimes I feel the weight of everything I’m feeling and thinking is almost too heavy to put on the page. And certainly too hard to try to explain. Depression can be so lonely but this helped me feel just a little less alone.

  176. I feel you, sister. You’re right and brave to share in the middle of depression. Otherwise others don’t know what it’s like. Hang in there. It will get better ❤️‍🩹

  177. Wanted you to know that this was very much appreciated. Thank you for sharing ALL of yourself!

  178. Jenny, I’m just catching up on this post but I wanted to tell you how much I feel for you right now. My partner has depression and CPTSD, and he spends many days like you are now. I know this sounds strange, but see if getting a long foot rub helps mitigate your symptoms at all. We have found for my partner that reflexology is a real thing and sometimes a foot rub can significantly calm his panic attacks even if it doesn’t stop them completely.

  179. I love you. Thank you for sharing, I can see how hard that was, but it helps.

  180. This is the same way depression and anxiety affect me…but I’m a lawyer, so I still gut through. But at least my writing doesn’t need to be funny. In fact, it’s best to use small words and short sentences in legal pleadings. THANK. GOD. We will BOTH be ok.

  181. Thank you for sharing at one of your low point or as I call it down in the black pit. As you know and said it will get better as you claw and scrape your way out once again. If nothing else, I think people who suffer from depression are some of the bravest people I know. That includes me( cue pat on the back)! We are all here for you pushing your ass up towards the light so you don’t have to crawl out on your own.
    I know you didn’t think your story about your stories wasn’t funny but I laughed. My mantra is and always will be “Depression Lies”!

  182. That was beautifully said Jenny. I wanted to give you a big hug but Alexa says you’re like 8000km away (she refuses to tell me in miles) and in addition to the giant stretchy arms required I think it would make us both uncomfortable.

  183. Awwww look at you sitting in the middle of pain and loss of control and still wanting to encourage others. I just want to hug you right now but I’m barely able to stand the heat here in Montreal so can only imagine what Texas is like with the same heat wave except I think you’re closer to the sun. Or something.

    That said, know this:

    You know the funny hasn’t left you because you can still see the potential in writing about the same thing twice and not remembering.

    You know there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel because you’ve been through it a gazillion times before.

    You know that logic is stronger than depression because YOU JUST KNOW. Hang onto the logic.

    You know you’re doing good things for other people because it comes from the heart.

    Sending you wishes for a speedy return. *SWOOOSH* (What I imagine a wish sounds like.)

  184. Thinking of you! Probably helps that I’ve got two cats taking over my side of the bed, I’m wearing my cool glasses, and reading a book that is begging to bring in some more light.

    Sending you some of my light – sometimes there isn’t much, but certainly enough each day. And enough to share.

  185. You are so brave and I’m so grateful for you sharing your experiences. Big hugs, tomorrow is a new day.

  186. Thank you for this. So much. I’ve been feeling like a failure the past couple weeks because I was doing memoir-ish writing (heavy emphasis on the “ish”) for Camp NaNoWriMo and… totally lost momentum. Then I realized I’d messed up something in my one piece of writing. (I just went and fixed it after hearing about your writing kerfuffle… *insert awkward laugh* Basically, I got memories/events mixed up. It’s a long story.) And it’s been about a year since a family member decided to attack my mom on social media over a feud that had nothing to do with her, so nerves are pretty raw.

    And I’ve been stressing out because I still haven’t gotten out to shop for a birthday present for my niece.

    But setting my problems aside… I hope you’re doing okay. You’re so badass and beautiful and the world is a much more wonderful place with you in it.

  187. I just saw your post, and I want to thank you for sharing your experience. You’ve let all of us who are, were, or will be in that dark place know we’re not alone. I hope that by the time you read this, you’ve emerged from the depression–or at least begun the process–and that you feel the love from all the people (including me) whose lives you’ve changed for the better through your writing. Thank you for everything you are and everything you do; the world is much, MUCH better with you in it!!!

  188. The biggest of hugs. Even when things are at their darkest remember you are bright light for others who are in the dark.

  189. Thank you for all the ways you share. I’ve been caring for my disabled mother since my father passed over a decade ago, and she has sufferers from depression her whole life. It reminds me that she also isn’t in control of her mind at times, helps me be more understanding, and remind me it’s not my fault that sometimes things are just really hard.

  190. I can’t thank you enough for sharing this glimpse into what could be my pile of filthy spoons.
    I just hate feeling so aggravated by every little thing and every one.

    The picture of my life needs to change, but I am so stuck in a mire of mood.

  191. Hi Jenny, Danny here from South Africa, thank you for being honest and sharing, found your book recently and loved it waiting for Broken it is going to be delivered mid August. Been diagnosed with CPTSD and processing a sexual assault that happened a few years back. It is really hard some days as you say, but we have survived all our hardest days already. Yes our brain says otherwise but we know different, because we are here and we are trying and that is already a lot. Sending love and HUGS

  192. I needed to buy a book on native plants the other day and just as I was dumbly going on a certain website I thought, wait no I’m gonna buy local, gosh darnit. Closest place was Nowhere. I noticed a pile of your books in the front and thought, oh yeah I forgot about her (nothing personal, just like writing the article twice, I mean You Are Here and a big box of Faber Castell 100% got me through 2020). I bought my plants book & went across the street to eat a taco. Then I went back. The guy behind the counter said, “You’re back!!” I bought Broken, signed with a little cat face. I’m finishing it up and thought, I’m gonna need more Jenny. So, the video maybe kinda changed my life. I’ve just never experienced looking in someone’s eyes (at someone’s eyes?) and seeing the very same tears as mine. I just feel better, at least for a minute. I mean I know things will be ok but also there’s climate change.

  193. I just watched this under a blanket. I’m a little behind on your blogs. Thank you for reassuring me. I have no one in my life that does that. So thank you 💙

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