Letters from Nancy

As regular readers know, Nancy W. Kappes (Paralegal) is my favorite fan in the entire history of the world and she sends me these bizarre, rambling emails that I print out and tape to my refrigerator and she won’t start a blog in spite of my prodding but she’s too awesome to keep to myself so IContinue reading “Letters from Nancy”

If you have a choice, don’t get rheumatoid arthritis. Or testicular cancer. I heard that one sucks too.

A series of things that should be separate posts but they aren’t: 1. Paraphrased conversation between me and my rheumatologist yesterday: Me: My feet are ouchie. Him: That’s because you have a degenerative disease, dumb-ass. Me: Yes, but I thought I’d be better by now. Him: I think you don’t know what “degenerative” means. Let’s upContinue reading “If you have a choice, don’t get rheumatoid arthritis. Or testicular cancer. I heard that one sucks too.”

I think Nancy W. Kappes (paralegal) might be me writing to me from the future. I am totally going to fuck up the space/time continuum.

So remember when I wrote about the greatest letter-writer in the history of the world (Nancy W. Kappes, Paralegal) and everyone said she should start her own blog and I was all “Yeah, Nance, why don’t you have a blog?” and she was all “Bitch, I don’t know from ‘BLOG’. That’s totally the noise I make when I’m throwing myContinue reading “I think Nancy W. Kappes (paralegal) might be me writing to me from the future. I am totally going to fuck up the space/time continuum.”

UPDATED: 50 bucks to take your 4-year-old to look at corpses = highway robbery

So today is Valentines Day but Victor is in Florida buying Japanese swords and did not leave me candy, jewelry or flowers. And granted, I don’t like any of those things and think that Valentines Day is dumb but still, everyone else is out getting wined and dined and my husband is getting drunk and buyingContinue reading “UPDATED: 50 bucks to take your 4-year-old to look at corpses = highway robbery”

Nancy W. Kappes is the greatest letter writer ever

Every couple of days I get an email from a woman in Indiana named Nancy W. Kappes and it is the highlight of my entire fucking week. Basically it’s like we’re having a really long weird conversation except I’m not actually talking. Also in my head she sounds exactly like the drag queen from Midnight in the Garden of Good AndContinue reading “Nancy W. Kappes is the greatest letter writer ever”