HOLY SHIT, WHY IS THERE A THREE-INCH WHITE HAIR ON MY FOREHEAD?

So, really, this isn’t a post.  It’s just me reaching out into the universe so that other people aren’t as alone as I was when I realized I was part unicorn.

Every night I wash my face and examine it to see if I have any new wrinkles.  This isn’t OCD.  It’s just part of being a girl.  With OCD.  So, last night I washed my face and checked it carefully and it was normal and then this morning I woke up and found a three inch white hair growing out of the center of my forehead.

What the shit, y’all.

It was totally not there yesterday and today it’s there.  So I started to think that maybe Victor glued it on to my forehead in the middle of the night just to be a dick but I don’t want to ask him about it because THERE IS A THREE INCH HAIR GROWING OUT OF MY FACE AND THAT IS NOT SEXY.  So I pull it out with tweezers and I go to look on the internet for “fast-growing white hair” and turns out that there are a lots message boards (lots = more than two.  Specifically, three.) about people who woke up with long white hairs growing out of them and about half are growing out of the middle of their foreheads.  Which is a really weird coincidence.

And, yes, I remember my great grandma having those old-lady chin hairs but this is not that, let me assure you.  It’s a giant, white hair growing out of the center of my forehead.  And then I started thinking that horns are made out of the same thing that fingernails and hair are made of and maybe this is just the way I turn into a unicorn.  So it was probably just a very limp unicorn horn.  The bad news is that I freaked out and plucked it before documenting it in a picture but the good news is that according to these message boards these white alien hairs frequently come back out of nowhere so if it happens again I’ll totally take a picture of it.

Anyway, this post is just to say that if you got here looking for “HOLY SHIT WHY IS THERE A THREE INCH WHITE HAIR ON MY FOREHEAD?” you are not alone and you might be turning into a unicorn.

You are welcome.

PS. Please tell me something weird about your body so I feel less fucked up in comparison.

832 replies. read them below or add one

  1. You can always braid your chin hairs with beads. It looks fabulous. Don’t ask me how I know!

    The Dose of Reality recently posted Not To Go Too Jerry Maguire On You….

  2. I’ve gotten that. Multiple times.

    I like your unicorn theory. Very much.

    We’re not weird, we’re MAGICAL.

    Q.E.D.

  3. I have a really hairy patch to the left of my belly button, which is probably four times as dense as the hair to the right of my belly button. Does that help?

    Deacon Blue recently posted A Love Limerick for Valentine’s Day.

  4. I consistently get one of those on my upper arm and my right jawline. My theory is that the hair usually lies flat and so you dont see it. but then one day the light catches it and youre like WTF???

    Point is- the hair will probably come back. because mine do. its like the worlds worst beard

    I should also mention here that alopecia and usually have no hair, so im all, WTF to this one effed up hair follicle that didnt get the stop-work message.

  5. Grey hairs. Growing OUT OF MY NECK.

  6. I pulled a two and a half inch white hair out of my nose a while ago. Seriously creepy.

  7. I used to have a black three inch hair that would grow out of the middle of my neck. SEXY.

    Saisquoi recently posted Breaking Up Is Hard To Do.

  8. I HATE limp unicorn horns. They seem so … personal.

    lceel recently posted 100 Word Challenge - Enough.

  9. I woke up one morning a few years ago with a two-inch long white hair growing out of the bridge of my nose. I thought I had lint in my eye until I realized it was attached. It grows back overnight about once a year now.

    Schmutzie recently posted Mom 2.0 Summit and the Three Way Death Match Podcast.

  10. My hubby has the same thing.

    ilikebeerandbabies.com recently posted Happy VD.

  11. I won’t even get started on the whole nipple adjustments I need to do when I wear a bathing suit ever since breastfeeding. And there’s my moustache. Also, when I jump up and down my ass slaps my thighs and it actually makes a noise. I think I’m going back to bed now.

    p.s. I also think there’s a direct correlation between my eyebrows getting thinner and my toes beginning to grow hair.

    Sharon recently posted Struggles.

  12. Sometimes when I sneeze, it smells awful. I have no idea why. I’ve googled and no one knows why, either. But it happens to a bunch of people. It freaks me out. Also, I have a little hole near my ear that is smelly. The doctor said it’s a hair follicle, but I call BS.

    I would totally prefer a possible unicorn horn to be smelly. :)

  13. Though I have never Googled “really long errant white hairs that seemingly appear overnight,” I assume they are natural because they appear on my chest regularly. See? At least it wasn’t on your chest!

    The Six-Fingered Monkey recently posted The Week In Review: Week #3.

  14. The smell of watermelon makes me nauseous. I know you can’t SEE that, but I’ve been assured that it’s weird.

    Brenna recently posted This crap practically writes itself.

  15. Does having three nostrils count?

  16. The universe was giving you a Valentines Day present. What’s better that unicorns?

    Corey Feldman recently posted Happy Valentines Day! Perfect day to buy my book!.

  17. I totally had one of those but on my cheek. So part-unicorn born with unicorn deformity.

  18. Definitely had those before. Though 3 inches, that’s determination!

    You know what’s fucked up? Tonsil stones. Thank god for the internet though, at least we now have names (and fellow sufferers) for our body weirdness.

  19. I get a weird, clear hair that magically appears overnight underneath my left eye. I swear, I get a weird twitch and the next day and inch long clear hair. I have red hair. Not sure where my clear hairs come from.

  20. I HAVE NO HAIRS GROWING FROM THE TOP OF MY HEAD!!!

    Ian Harper (@Harper_Ian) recently posted Slow motion fail (physics lesson, sorta).

  21. And now I feel like I have to carefully check my face every morning – because who knows when it will betray me and grow a unicorn horn in the middle of the night.

  22. I don’t have this, but I do have a random dark hair that grows out of my arm. One day, nothing, the next day, it’s like three inches. My sister has the same thing. I don’t know what that means we’re turning into, but we must not be cool enough to be unicorns.

    Allison recently posted Reese’s Peanut Butter Heart Cookies.

  23. I have one of those that grows out of my cheek. One day nothing, next day BAM. Huge long white hair. I also have a whisker that periodically appears on my chin but I never see it growing; I only see it when it bursts forth in its glory like a goatee from hell. That ones all coarse and black so its not even basically-invisible like my cheek one. :/

  24. Not only have I had the weird forehead hair that has grown back THREE fucking times, but a couple months ago my sister found 2 long gray hairs growing out of my EAR. Not even kidding.

  25. I have a surprise 1-2″ hair that grows out of my neck, but never in the same place twice.

  26. I had the same issue. I’m 16.. and I’m also graying. >.<

  27. I am regularly pulling unwanted hairs from MY EARLOBES these days.
    And I found long one of those thin, whispy, mutant hairs growing out of my shoulder recently.
    There. Feel better?

    Daddy Scratches recently posted Exciting news: I am now the millionaire owner of a Major League Baseball school whose employee roster includes Michael Cudlitz, star of the TNT cop-drama “SouthLAnd.”.

  28. My skull is so lumpy, that when I have had people feel the weird divets in it, they ask me if I was thrown around like a rag doll as a child. My boyfriend describes it as “freaky” and “good thing you have hair to cover that up”

  29. 29
    jessie hansen

    Playing with my belly button makes me have to pee. Also, since having kids (ie, pushing them out) I haven’t had to touch a soiled tampon. I just push like I did when I was in labor! Gross, but not more gross than touching a dirty tampon, right?

  30. I get one of these on my neck under my chin. The first time I found it I was 26. It was long. I freaked out. Now I notice it growing every other week or so and pluck it immediately. One other time I had a single white hair growing out of my eyelid. MY EYELID. It hasn’t come back since the first time I plucked it.

    Valerae recently posted Farewell Monty.

  31. It doesn’t get more horrifying than boob hair. I’d happy trade my boob hair for your unicorn hair.

  32. Oh you very young one, you have so many more bodily delights/changes to look forward to as you age, I wouldn’t want to spoil the surprise for you by sharing mine; but one word to the wise: stay away from magnifying mirrors. Far away.

    They are evil.

    Bodaciousboomer recently posted Nothing says I love you like a bucket of sloths….

  33. Occasionally find one growing out of my right jawline. No idea how it gets to be so long. I tend towards weird hairs and I keep watch for them. Then BANG! Three inches. And I now have one white lower eyelash. WTH?

  34. So I should stop whining about the chin hairs?

    My Half Assed Life recently posted A Rant Followed By A Touching Story of Tomato Love.

  35. I have a white chest hair that keeps coming back. Is this what it means to be turning 40??

  36. My mom often complains of big stray hairs growing out of her neck. Unfortunately for her, she can’t claim to be a unicorn.

    Just moments ago, I went to the washroom, and after I was done, I was washing my hands and I had a massive unexpected attack of sneezes. Apparently I wasn’t as done peeing as I thought I was, and I wet my pants a little. Also not nearly as cool as being a unicorn.

    JIll recently posted Yes, I had a reservation? Pity party for one?.

  37. keep it growing, you can use it to make a wand.

  38. I’ve got a small hair that grows out of the bottom of my chin. Sometimes it’s white. Sometimes brown. It never grows longer than a centimeter, but does grow out over night!

    That Other Mom recently posted The Tardis is my Beyotch! Happy Valentine's Day!.

  39. I have a completely white patch on my left ankle. Everything around it will tan, no problem, but it won’t. No clue why not, and it’s been that way since I was a child.

    David recently posted Having Staff.

  40. Damn it, I always get the shitty end of the stick. My superfine, fast growing white hair grows out of the side of face. I want to be a limp unicorn too.

  41. I have about six black witch hairs that grow out of my chin and neck. Just like your horn, they magically appear out of nowhere and are suddenly 3 inches long. And they never appear at the same time.

  42. I have one massive black one that comes out of the inside of my elbow. It’s weird. But it’s mine.

  43. I wear fake toenails on my big toes because my real ones are hideously deformed due to ingrown toe nails when I was a teenager.

    Also? I have one of those 3″ long white hairs…in the center of my chest. Hot, right?

    Mel recently posted Oh, how times change!.

  44. I have two birthmarks. One is a medium-sized brown free-form thing on my rear end that has unfortunate placement and makes people do double-takes, especially if I’ve just come out of the restroom. [Of course, this is only noticeable if I am wearing a bathing suit, which I don't tend to do very often.]

    Corinne recently posted The Arrow - [Scriptic].

  45. My husband and I both get those, although mine are usually more off to the side, like half-way between the mid-arch of my eyebrow and my hairline.

    I remember when my husband and I realized that we both got these things (“You, too??”) My husband calls them cancer hairs, since they’re pure white and seem to appear spontaneously.

  46. I have a mutant arm hair right where my elbow bends. It’s also a good 3 inches long & always grows back no matter how many times I pluck it. I usually leave it alone – mostly because it’s amusing to watch my husband freak out if the mutant arm hair gets caught in a breeze and starts flapping around. My sister has one in the same spot. You should check with your sis to see if she’s part unicorn too.

  47. look at it this way …. if you are a unicorn then you can poop rainbows and say with truthfulness that “your shit doesn’t stink”

  48. One hair, top of my right ear. More of a bull’s horn than a unicorn.

  49. I have a mole. Nay- a beauty mark above my lip. Okay, it’s closer to my nose, but that’s less cool. SIgh. This beauty mark goes from zero to Wicked-Witch-of-the-West overnight. I’m normal during bedtime routine then when I catch a glimpse in the van mirror as I’m driving kids to school there’s like 3 long black hairs trying to conquer my face. What?!? I’m a redhead for one. And what?!?
    Next time take a picture then pluck.

  50. I bruise like a peach. I know that may not seem weird to you, but as a child I think more than one complaint was filed with CPS because strangers thought my parents were beating me. Turns out, I’m just clumsy and bruise easily.

    Ashley recently posted 50 Reasons Why it’s Fabulous to be Single on V Day (well, and every day)..

  51. I suppose if it grows on your ass you are still just a regular horse…. damn

    Kerry :) recently posted I don’t know if this song is about killing or sex… Either way… I dig it..

  52. I have white chin hair. I am going to have a very long goatee with a black mustache!

    Melissa Lawler recently posted Foodies Night In Twitter Party AND Give-Away!.

  53. in today’s news: the creator of the ‘unicorn success club’ is turning into a unicorn.
    meanwhile, a local woman wonders why those few strands of hair refuse to accept colour and insist on sitting there mocking her.

  54. Weird loves company!

    Haven’t you ever seen the Dr. Seuss quote?

    We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find
    someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them
    and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”

    That’s pretty much my personal motto.

    Julie recently posted This morning, Captain Energy.

  55. My overnight-three-inch-long-hair is black and appears on my shoulder. Quite fetching.

  56. Is it odd that I’m sad that my random upper arm arm hair was only like an inch long when I found it and freaked out? I should have bonded with it and let it grow to it’s full potential. Now I’ll never know if I’m a deformed unicorn.

    Marci

    Marci recently posted Love, Beer, and Sex Mix Songs.

  57. Sometimes, when I poop, it smells like cat poop. No joke. Gross, but true.

    Katy Bug recently posted The Perfect Yarn For Furniture Feet?.

  58. my mom has one. i also call it her unicorn horn!

    as for personal bodily oddity, i can’t compete with the above so i’m not even trying.

    Anna recently posted Happy Valentine's Day!.

  59. The same thing has totally happened to me…it’s all wiry and shit. Creeps me out.

  60. I have a mole on my right arm that four hairs grow from. Not one hair. Not fifteen hairs. Four hair. They’re long too. And when I shave it, four grow back. I’ve counted. It kinda freaks the bf out but I’m convinced it’s part of my superpower.

  61. I had ONE eyelash that just kept on growing. I just called it my ‘wild hair’ and went about my business. Of course, it eventually fell out and has never returned…Maybe you’ll be that lucky!

    Alli recently posted Crunchy Poppers in Phyllo Shells.

  62. Jenny you are sooooooo not alone!! OMG! Sadly mine was smack dab in the middle of my cheek, same thing over night the crazy 3 inch long hair was just there! Ewww I completely freaked out! AND as if that is not bad enough oh no, I get the same thing only its dark counter part, a 3 inch long jet black hair growing out of the side of my neck on the other side! Ugh! yeah so I think that means I am turning into a yetti, or a wookie, or maybe the abonimable snow girl? Thoughts? And I really hope you read this lol

  63. Oh my god…I’m not alone! My partner “lovingly” teases me about this every time it comes back. As a guy I don’t routinely pluck anything or scrutinize myself that much but I shave it whenever I notice it or he points it out.

  64. This is why I love this place and everyone in it. The level of acceptance is unparalleled. Thank you Jenny! I am laughing so hard right now. Anyhow, I don’t mean to brag or anything but I too have had a ridiculously long white hair growing on my body. In my case it’s the side of my neck. I pulled it thinking it was a piece of thread and oh holy shit no, that little fucker was attached.

    Carolina recently posted My parking brings all the guards to the yard.

  65. Oh, and something weird about my body: all of a sudden, one of my fingernails has started growing . . . crooked. It curls under at the tip, so now I have an excuse to keep them all short! I could never be a drug dealer. Mine would be less scraper and more scooper.

    Julie recently posted This morning, Captain Energy.

  66. When I was 16 I suddenly found an i-inch white hair growing on my arm. I proudly remember it as my first white hair but after some time it disappeared. It never appeared back. Maybe it’s good; I’m not sure a horn growing out of your arm would be comfortable…

  67. You are not alone. My husband has this one long hair that grows right out the eyeball of his tattoo. It is disturbing. Every time I see it, I have to pluck it out and he insists that it is attached to his spinal cord…..

  68. I get the long white hairs overnight, too, but on my chin, just like little old lady hairs. I’ve never googled it, so before now, I was afraid that I’d somehow missed them for the weeks it would take them to grow that long.

  69. My husband uses a barber, an actual barber, why? Well first it helps him feel manly which apparently he needs since his balls are nicely tucked away near my ice maker. But mostly because a real barber, doesn’t even flinch at these things. A real barber has what most of us would call hedge clippers, and tin snips. When he clamps down on the 30 stiff, coarse, rail road spiked that are jumping out of my husbands ears and eyebrows they make a ‘TINK TINK TINK” noise.. If I were smart I would have save these “clippings”, dipped them in laxatives and used them as blow darts on some heinous wenches. maybe you should save yours too, for the same reason, or a scrap book, OMG wait, you could save them up and have your dad totally make you a new critter… a Jennycorn…. OMG.. yes that’s it.

    ThePeachy1 recently posted Customer Service.

  70. This morning my 3yo and I were naming body parts. Nose, nostril, eyelid, etc.. I pointed at my chin and she said, “beard!”

  71. If I eat too fast? This one spot on my scalp gets really itchy.

  72. I have a magically-appearing clear (ok, very faintly silver)…(Ok, ok, white!) hair that grows out overnight under my right eye. It visits me about once a year.

  73. I get those too. I also have so much chin hair, my husband says if I grew it out it would look like the beard of a old Chinese man. He’s also willing to pull those awful hairs which is abhorrent and comforting too. Count your blessings girl.

  74. I had one of those grow out of my cheek, magically, so my unicorn horn hasn’t figured out its suppose to come out of my forehead….I think my unicorn dna got the wrong signals from the home world, could ya beam a message back next time you get yours and let them know some of us aren’t getting our horns in the right location?

  75. I have a hair that grows under my eye – like the place you put concealer on to cover dark circles. Only it’s thick and hard, kind of like a plastic thread. I have to pluck it like once a week. I’d say I’m more likely turning into a porcupine than a unicorn.

  76. I had one on my arm once. Didnt happen overnight but it was 6 inches long when I decided to end the tyranny of its reign.

  77. I totally get those growing out of my shoulders. Like freakishly long hairs. I never thought about hair being made of the same things as fingernails and horns. I bet it’s the same things that wings are made of. All these years of plucking those hairs out, I probably would have had wings by now. WTF. Maybe I’m not living up to my La Chusa potential.

  78. So yesterday I walked over to the local nail salon because my claws needed to be sawed down a bit. I decided to treat myself & have my hands done, too. Then the lady started looking at me and begging to wax my eyebrows. I”m pretty sure they decided to gang up on me while speaking in their native tongue, because the other one had walked away, came back & asked if they could wax my eyebrows. I now have about half an eyebrow left on my entire face. I’m glad I didn’t let them wax anything else, even when she told me “You’ll be pretty if you let me wax here.” (pointing above my lip)
    So, I have about half an eyebrow, and apparently, a mustache. And I’ll have to go back, because they did a really good job on my nails.

  79. I occasionally wake up with a 3 inch white hair growing out of the middle of my cheek.

  80. Ohgod, I just realized: what if it’s some kind of parasitic form? IT appears suddenly because it doesn’t grow; it ATTACHES ITSELF. So in plucking it you didn’t prevent yourself from getting a horn: you saved your brain from alien invasion.
    I cannot IMAGINE what harm could aliens imply on humanity if they were armed with your brain :O

  81. 81
    Jennifer Bet.

    I totally just choked on my banana. Hair on the face is not there one day and then POOF long-haired thing that makes me want to say “what is this hair on my chinny-chin-chin?”

  82. I get these growing from my arms! Brought it up in conversation once and got looked at like a crazy person.

  83. It’s all the thinking you do about Unicorn Success Club manifesting as a unicorn horn.

    My “weird thing” is that the left side of my body is larger than the right side. Left foot is a half size larger than the right left ankle, calf & thigh are larger…. Left wrist is larger.

    Sadly, most people find “asymmetrical” people less attractive. (At least that’s what people in labcoats report)

    MsDarkstar recently posted An Interview with an Author.

  84. I have a funny thick white hair that grows out of my one breast.

    Vivian recently posted Special Date Birthdays Are a Curse.

  85. Holy shit! You must be developing your mutant powers. Soon I am sure you will look like Rogue and they will whisk you off to join the X men.

    For reals though, I have a friend with a third nipple. No joke. Im only a little jealous.

  86. I have noticed lately that I have white eyebrow hair (the fuckers point straight out too) and now white eyelashes. I guess they match my Rouge white streak in my hair.

  87. I have a fungus-y finger from wearing acrylic nails in the 90s and it looks like a witch’s finger that’s bumpy and discolored and it’s magical, too, so if you want I can use Fungus Finger (nicknamed “Gus”) and touch your forehead to make the white hairs stop. Because I’m a good friend like that.

  88. bwahahahaha omg I’m cracking up!!!!! Isn’t it lovely???? I haven’t had that one happen yet, but I have a mole on my arm that sprouts long black hair now and then. While the dermatologist says it’s fine, it’s hideous ;-) Oh and I’m having an eczema/dry skin breakout in the outer flap of my ear and inside my nose. LOVELY.

    Michele C. recently posted Blizzard Nemo and The Aftermath #nemo.

  89. Is it full moon in Texas right now?
    If so…err, best keep away from silver.

    Claire J recently posted Rejections & Restlessness.

  90. OHMYFUCKINGGOD I HAVE ONE OF THOSE THAT KEEPS GROWING BACK AND I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY PERSON IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD WHO WAS A UNICORN.

    Woah, deep breath. So super glad I am not alone in this.

    Carmen recently posted I'm a private dancer..

  91. Occasionally I get a white, very thick eyebrow hair that seemingly grows overnight out of only my left eyebrow….and it’s always a surprise! I look for it almost every night but all of a sudden it will just appear and i pluck it out and show my daughter and she tells me, “it’s gross mom, quit showing me this”…but I can’t help it cause I want someone else to see that I’m not making it up. I can only hope I will one day grow a unicorn horn…a much more regal phenom! Next time post a picture! Love your blog and your book! Tracy

  92. Wow. I feel like I need to rush to a mirror after reading how many others have experienced this! My first thought was FREAKY! That is just plain freaky. How does this happen? I’m assuming this growing beneath the skin the whole time, kind of like an ingrown hair but no swelling because there is no bacteria to cause inflammation. Then one day it just breaks through and boom! Instant hair!

    My husband has some really, really thick whiskers so one day I decided to tweeze them out. They were so long under the skin it freaked me out! It was barely any stubble on the top and yet underneath the surface was this long thick hair!

    I don’t have anything really weird to share other than I can’t sneeze without crossing my legs to keep from peeing my pants. That’s pretty normal for someone who’s had three kids though I’m told. Sucks. Oh, and I get little blackheads on my areolas. Is that strange?

    LeAnnWoo recently posted Dumb Ways to Die.

  93. I have several coarse black hairs that spontaneously appear on my face (I’m a girl), but two of them are in exactly the same place but on opposite sides of my face. Symmetry is one of my “things”, so it probably shouldn’t surprise me that my mutant hairs make an effort to at least be even. And, yes, they go from not-there to 2 inches long overnight. WTF – why can’t my socially-acceptable hair do that?!

  94. I’ve had one of those for years! It goes away eventually but my first reaction was similar to yours… Unicorn! At least it’s not black and thick and coming out of your back like “The Fly.” As you age weird stuff starts growing everywhere. Invest in an excellent magnified mirror and put your makeup on by a window with natural light. The good thing is your eyes get worse so you can’t see all your new appendages. Now, if you start growing a tail, I would be concerned.

  95. I have some white armpit hair, which indicates death is just around the corner and that I’m a zebra sans stripes.

    Rhana recently posted Happy burning effigy day..

  96. About four years ago, I had a four inch hair randomly appear on my lower back. It hasn’t grown back since I freaked out and ripped it out. So, it may never come back!

    Crystal recently posted Ramble.

  97. Thanks, commenters— the people who monitor my internet at work are probably BAFFLED right now at the weird, fucked up shit I’ve just maniacally googled!!! :P

  98. 98
    Cookie McCool

    For as long I can remember I have had a long white hair that grows out of my right cheek. Luckily it doesn’t come back all ingrown when I pluck it down.

  99. Haven’t gotten one on the forehead. Used to have one that would continually reappear every few weeks on the middle of my spine back when I was in middle school. Multiply average girls’-locker-room-anxiety by THAT. I did find one on my cheek the other week and freaked the fuck out when I found a few more hiding in my hairline. I’m twenty-five, Jenny. TWENTY-FIVE. Or, at least, I will be twenty-five next week. Yes, I’m still young enough to explain my age by “almost X.” I’ve decided that I am not going white yet, I am being plagued by alien hairs.

  100. 100
    "Most Assuredly Not a Unicorn" Jack

    Jenny, you were supposed to leave it!! Real unicorns don’t start out with the solid horns, they start out like that and quickly grow more solid and magical and butterfly-y. Quick, make a rainbow in your house (sunlight through a 2-liter bottle filled with water) and see if you can walk on it a little.

  101. I have a little mole on my left arm. When I was little, my aunt was giving me a bath and she kept scrubbing it ’cause she thought it was dirt. I also have a long dark hair that grows on the same side of my face my Mom had a mole with hair growing. There, two for one. ;)

  102. 102
    Sarah Burcker

    Apparently my unicorn horn wants to grow out the side of my boob…… one day nothing and the next morning BAM!!! white hair side boob!

  103. I have two granulomas in my breast and one finally abscessed and ruptured and now I have boob puss. Feel better now?

    Miranda recently posted Fever and Ague.

  104. My sister totally gets these! She gets them on her forehead and out of her cheeks. I will have to let her know that she is part of a group of select people who get to be transformed into unicorns and that she should just let them keep growing. Of course, I would take an inappropriate amount of joy in seeing her face covered in wicked long white hairs and because of that reason, she wouldn’t do it. She never wants to do anything fun….

  105. I had an eyelash in my eye so I asked a friend to help me get it out. She found the lash and tried to lift it out of my eye, only to find it was a long, white eyebrow hair. I keep my eyebrows shaped and trimmed but this one rogue eyebrow hair had grown (overnight) and swirled all the way down to my eye. Nice.

    Heather recently posted Sally Blake's Pumpkin Cake.

  106. I blame hormones. Turned 40 and developed the single chin hair as well as one that grows out the side of my neck. So freakin’ weird. You’re not alone at all :)

    Melanie J. recently posted Tip of the Iceberg.

  107. Three little words – random white pubes

  108. My irises have freckles. For reals. The retina in my right eye even has a mole. I (or make that my optometrist) even has pictures of it. As a matter of fact, every year she dilates my pupils to the size of dinner plates and makes me practically roll my eyes in the back of my head just to get MORE pictures of it. She says she needs the pictures to “monitor it” but I think she takes them to eye doctor conventions and shows them off like you would a side show freak. I might not be turning into a unicorn, but I think maybe I’ve found my “inner eye”.

    Alyssa S. recently posted Turns out he wants to dance too.

  109. My friend just went to a reiki class and it was based on who your spirit animal was. She said it comes to you in a vision. She’s pretty sure hers is a unicorn. Nothing’s grown out of her head yet though. She is going to be sooo jealous! Your assessment is right on. You can now add clairvoyant to your list…and check it off.

    marrymeknot recently posted You Are Cordially Invited.

  110. Have had many of those random long hair things appear…always nice when friends or romantic partners find it first. Sigh.

    The human body is weird…glad we’re redefining normal (though I wish it would hurry up so I don’t feel so weird).

  111. Sometimes I’ll have an eyelash that instead of falling out, turns silver and keeps growing. And then it gets tangled in my other eyelashes and it’s all terrible.

  112. 112
    IDoNotLikeTheConeOfShame

    I get the Wierd White Hair, but it’s on my cheek. In my experience, even after you tweeze it, it will grow back again in that same spot. Sometimes immediately, sometimes it will take a hiatus. So be vigilant.

  113. Oh yeah, and does it get any worse than when someone goes “oh, you have a dog hair on your face” and then goes to pull it off and it IS ACTUALLY ATTACHED?!?!!?!!?

    Thank god it only happened with my husband, who (by now) is totally used to my weirdness. But I still replay that awkward tug on my bottom lip, my eyes going wide with shock, and his absolutely inability to know HOW to react to the situation.

  114. I have a mole in the back of my head, the middle, nestled snuggly under all of my hair. It grows a bit each year, so I comb over it, it bleeds (as though I don’t know it’s there.) I go to the dr and she says leave it; it’s not cancerous, just…growing. I go to the hairdresser, she combs over it, it bleeds (as though she too doesn’t know it’s there but I’ve been going to her for 5+ years.)

    Arnebya recently posted Sometimes.

  115. Seriously…. the post is awesome, but the comments here are the icing on the cake. Just the laugh I needed!

    Cathy recently posted I’m sorry: An open letter to my loved ones.

  116. Jen,

    I had one of those growing out the side of my ear for idn a couple of yrs until it went away. And it would pop out long and fully grown, just like the one on your forehead. Weird.

    Janet

  117. I get the white hair thingy on the back of my ear. It’s a bitch to remove and once I discover it’s there I MUST remove it IMMEDIATELY! Mine isn’t wispy though. It’s wiry and I hate it. It appears whenever it damn well pleases. I also get those horrible little black chin hairs. I prefer to call them stray eyebrows. That way I feel better about them being on my face. They belong, but they’re just a little bit lost. Ya know what I mean?

  118. I have one eyelash on my left eye that likes to grow longer than all the rest. I trim it or else it looks like a loose eyelash and people try to grab it off. It fell out once and I thought Finally! It’s gone!
    NOPE! It came back. Back to trimming. It’s thicker than others, too.

    Charla recently posted Viva La Vivo.

  119. My husband and I were getting ready to go to the beach. I had him spray my back side with sunscreen. He’s like “ummm, WHAT IS THIS” I had a 6 inch GRAY hair coming out of my shoulder. He thought it was a loose hair..but it was attached!

  120. I have a long white hair that grows out above my right eyebrow. It’s very thin and fine, but grows quite briskly. I first noticed it while I was in college. Since it’s thin and doesn’t really bother me and is almost invisible, I kind of let it do its thing. I figure that somewhere along the line, this bunch of skin cells were like ‘WE NEED TO BE A FOLLICLE! START MAKING HAIR’. Who am I to keep them from their dream? So I let it grow, because why not.

    Once, when I was getting a haircut, the stylist wordlessly snipped it. He didn’t even miss a beat. He was just doing his snippy-snippy-snippy thing, then it was like “Oh. That shouldn’t *snip* be there” and on with the snipping. I tried not to react, but part of me was all “YOU CUT MY FREAK HAIR, NOW I’M JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE”.

    But it did grow back eventually.

    I think about this hair entirely too much.

    (I love all of these comments but this one is a favorite. ~ Jenny)

  121. I get weird long white hairs that grow on a few places on me – mostly upper arms and one on my stomach.

    Weird body-ness – I’m hypermobile which means I can do a let of freaky things with bending my joints so it looks like I’m broken. I did a forward roll once and hit my head as I went and everyone thought I’d broken my neck but I just bend that way.

    I have a large mole on my back that freaks one of my friend’s out – he thinks it looks like an eye!

    Fern Kali recently posted Marriage.

  122. Does it count as a horn if one randomly grows out of your chin… and it isn’t actually white? Please say yes….

    Synnove @ Don't Chew On The Dinner Table! recently posted Sweet Nothings For Your Eyes....

  123. This is why some women take Viagra – to help their limp unicorn hairs / horns…

    Kara recently posted OWH Cards for Kids & My Favorite Things Fundraiser.

  124. My sister gets one just as you describe & our grandmother told her they were worry hairs! We’re you particularly worried about something? Maybe google worry hair!

  125. I was shaving my legs in the shower and noticed on the back of my ankle a piece of hair. I naturally thought it was from my head, I proceeded to take it off. Imagine my surprise when I fucking hurt….because it was connected to my ankle! You are telling me I missed shaving the same exact spot long enough to allow a strand of leg hair an inch long?! I was so grossed out I didn’t tell anyone … until now.

    P.S. I too recently realized that I am an unicorn. Giddy-up, bitches.

    ~ r.

  126. The EXACT same thing happened to me when I was ten years old! Long white blond hair, ’bout two inches long grew overnight in between my eyebrows! what.the.frack.
    At least now I know I’m not alone in my unicorn/circus freak -ness.

  127. I had one of those mini bumps on the forehead might be a pimple, boil, ingrown hair or just a raised whatever. Well, managed to after a few minutes of squeezing and pressing and looking very closely to extract it. But as I did it seemed to be deep-rooted and did not want to let go. Yanked it and felt to grab on for dear life before withdrawing it. Examined it and almost sent it to a lab to have it analyzed. Now, if I pass someone on the street or mall I look and see if they might have one too (Look on the average passerby’s forehead, you’ll see it). Then I think to myself, now I cannot be tracked I removed the bio-electronic tracking device. I can move freely about my business. Ok, first few sentences are true. Let me be honest about that. The rest slightly exaggerated, but I still have the ziploc bag with the little bugger in it. Just in case.

  128. About twice a year, my upper lashes become very short, and the lower lashes grow long. Its like they switch places. I mentioned it to my dr once and he looked at me like he was about to prescribe some anti-psychotics.

  129. I get one of those in my left eyebrow and the back of my left arm. I’m one fucked up unicorn.

  130. my friend and i call those “Wolfies.”

    and yes, they appear magically over night. or at least I fucking they are coming out overnight because if i’ve been walking around with long scraggly hairs on my forehead, chin or shoulders – yes — shoulders – i’m feeling like i should just give up on life right now.

    Simone recently posted Does a title entitle you to act like a chump?.

  131. 131
    Elizabeth M.

    I have three words for you:

    Recurring Chin Hairs

    Getting older sucks

  132. I can wiggle my ears, cross my eyes and touch my nose with my tongue…..all at the same time. Random, but that takes some real damn talent!!!

    batpoopcrazy recently posted Happy greeting.card.candy.florist.jeweler.economy.stimulation Day!.

  133. I have a somewhat small but totally noticeable birth mark right on the crease my inner thigh. My husband told me that the first time he saw it he thought I was just dirty, but after seeing it a few times he realized it was permanent, LOL.

  134. Oh, I have lots of those…

    White one on my forehead.
    Two black ones on my chin.
    A small white one on my cheek.
    And don’t get me started on my nipples….

    You are definitely not alone!

  135. I’m pretty sure my dad is turning into Oswald from the Muppets. His eyebrows went crazy. He has hair growing out of everything except his head. He has to keep cutting his neck/chest hair because he looks like he is smuggling a troll doll in the collar of his shirt. It is hilarious to see.
    Doesn’t everyone get the random 3 inch white hair somewhere? Mine is on my arm. My son has one on his jaw line. My daughter has one on her chin. My husband is hobbit hairy, so he could have 20 and we’d never know.

    Rixie4 recently posted Father/Daughter Pictures.

  136. Directly above my left elbow, hidden in the formation of “skin” is a huge, solid, fat deposit. I guess that being right handed, I just don’t use my left arm enough to get it to leave. I also have one on the front if my calf (noo… the one that is part of my LEG..) but I have found that if I manipulate it A LOT – especially using my fingernails – I can get it to break up. This hurts like a Maternal Fork but it’s worth it to have nice calves, right? I mean, underneath all that unshaven leg hair there should be no fatty LUMPS hanging around. Am I right? …What? Oh puh-leeeze… Like you shave your legs just because.. Ohhh… right right right right riiiight…. OCD. I forgot.

    xoxo, ~ Diane

    Diane recently posted Happy Valentine’s Day!.

  137. Ummm, you’re not alone. But mine grow on my chest between the girls. So weird.

  138. 138
    GrainneAtNight

    I have two auxiliary nipples and two spleens.

  139. My 13 year old daughter had one on her cheek about a year or so ago. We cuddle every night and one night I touched her cheek and there it was. We screamed and giggled and freaked out before we plucked it. It hasn’t come back. She’ll be glad to see that other people do that, too. I didn’t even think to Google it!

    Milaka recently posted A Slippery Facebook Slope.

  140. I get a really long white hair growing out of the left side of my face. It also springs up virtually overnight. Mine isn’t even cool enough to be a burgeoning Unicorn horn. Sigh…

    Gin recently posted Communication Breakdown.

  141. I may or may not have TOTES had this same experience with a white hair ON MY CHEEK. A week ago. Maybe. I’m still sticking with the “my SO glued it on while I was sleeping” theory.

  142. My hair doesn’t grow on my forehead, it grows out of my neck.

    Also my thumbs are double jointed.

    Jaime recently posted A Valentine's Day Manifesto? Or something?.

  143. I’ve gotten one of those on my right cheek. I totally freaked, thinking that this mutant hair had been growing for months without me noticing. I much prefer to believe that it showed up overnight.

    Rachel recently posted Kaddish.

  144. Here’s something pretty fucked up. I have had two kids and even after I lose the weight, I have loose skin hanging in my lower abdomen. Unfortunately, one side of the loose skin hangs much lower than the other. WTF, right? Oh the joys of having children.

  145. I THINK I might be a unicorn too. But I can’t tell you where the horn is unless it’s in private and we have one of those psychologist’s anatomically correct dolls.
    Also, I’m 47, can still put both legs completely behind my head, climb and bounce on my butt off a high dive, unfold in midair and do a pike into a somersault dive.

  146. At 35 and someone who found her first gray hair at 18 years old (yes I kid you not and my grandfather also grayed prematurely), I have lost count all the gray hairs on my head now. I just thank god for hair dye!!!

    Janine Huldie recently posted Comment on Flashback Wordless Wednesday #5 by Janine Huldie.

  147. I always random, weirdly long hair between my boobs. Or a mutant eyebrow hair that manages to burrow in the other hairs, until one day I pluck it, and it’s inches long.

    Kara recently posted Why I'm Happy Today- February 12th Edition.

  148. My darling partner gets a similar hair on the right side of her neck. I look for it constantly and I’ve lovingly named it George. The first time I noticed it was in the middle of a sidewalk in a small town square….and promptly removed it. She still swears to this day that this is the reason people were staring at us (though I’m going with the fact that we’re gay and small town folks are prone to staring anyway).

    She says I’m the weird one for having a thing for personal grooming …but she’s the one with a hair that magically appears. I, mean..I’m JUST sayin!

    Alex recently posted Something New.

  149. I don’t understand why you say the hair grew out of “nowhere” when obviously it grew out of your forehead. Duh.

    Marinka recently posted Love.

  150. I really should not have been reading this when I was on hold for my son’s doctor…. Sharon tipped me over the edge.

    Catherine recently posted Cabin fever 2013 - pinch pots.

  151. I also have the smelly earhole thing. Hair follicle my ass. Being human is fun, no? It’s the whole human to magical beast thing that is difficult. Transitions are hard, but I’m glad you’re creating a support group.

  152. You’re not alone….I found one of those too!!!! What a weird place for a hair to grow right!?!

  153. In the moment after I sneeze, I am filled with rage. It subsides quickly, but is very real while it lasts. Other people’s sneezes irritate me, but my own sneezes are an anger trigger.

  154. I have a lot of white hairs growing out of everywhere (sorry, TMI), and yet, I still have pimples – I mean LOTS of frickin’ pimples. It’s like my body can’t decide if I’m still a hormonal teen or a menopausal woman…and I’m 43. I’m so confused. http://bit.ly/WhBsQX

    Jen recently posted Valentine's Day 1996.

  155. Your third eye grew a long, wise lash. Bravo!

    J.mill recently posted Happy Valentines.

  156. I have several super-long hairs on the backs of my thighs. I don’t shave my upper legs because they’re not very hairy…except for these rogue hairs. It’s very hard to see the backs of your thighs (unless you’re some kind of contortionist, which I’m not) so I don’t notice them until I randomly scratch the back of my leg. The upside is I live in Washington where summer lasts about a minute so I hardly ever wear shorts.

    Shannon recently posted Faking It On Facebook.

  157. Don’t feel bad Janine H.! I got my first gray at 16, and I’m 1/3 gray (and not even 30!).

    My mom went completely gray somewhere between 35 and 40, although she dyed her hair so much I’m not exactly sure when. It’s pretty much the reason I’ve been dying my hair every color I can since I was young – I figure if I start now no one will suspect anything later :o)

  158. I get the same thing every month or so but it grows out of my left earlobe. Overnight. Seriously freaky stuff. But it happens to all of us after a “certain” age (29).

    Tea Silvestre recently posted Needs and Desires: How to Use a Focus Group to Uncover the Good Stuff.

  159. When I read this, one name came into my mind: Ionesco. We may be at the beginning of a plague, here. Not to alarm you or anything.

  160. I have no pinky toenail on my left foot. Makes pedicures interesting. Most of the time I just paint over the skin patch where the nail should be.

    Rachel recently posted Valentine’s Day.

  161. 161
    MerriCollins

    The idea of unicorns pooping rainbows has always upset me. Why would they do that?

    You being a unicorn is a truth, embrace it… please do not poop rainbows please.

    That is all

  162. Welcome to the unicorn club! I’ve had the unicorn thing going on since I was 16. (Possibly earlier, but discovered at 16.) I’m 37 now, and it’s turned into a kick-ass Rogue streak, so X-Men fan-boys love me. Oh, and if you go to Taiwan or China, the teenagers there are obsessed with different colors of hair, and will be mesmerized by the streak as well. It’s pretty cool in a “OMG strange kids are touching my hair without permission” kinda way.

  163. I have one that grows on my neck. It is very thin and transparent, so I usually don’t notice it until it gets to be four or five inches long. Then, I pull it out, and about a year later, it’s time to do it again. Been happening for several years now. I feel better knowing many other people have pet hairs.

  164. Yup, I’ve had the Weird Long Lone White Facial Hair too, on my left cheek and also under my chin. They aren’t that visible so I often forget about them, but I do have one black hair coming out of my chin that gets plucked as soon as the tweezers have enough to grip. What’s freaking me out these days are the white hairs showing up elsewhere on my body amongst the regular dark hair, like in my eyebrows and eyelashes and *ahem* lady garden. It’s bad enough that I’ve had gray hairs popping up on my head since I was in my 20s, but these new locations really make me feel old!

  165. I once discovered a 3″ hair growing out of the side of my boob. It wasn’t white, but it also wasn’t there before. It just sprung out suddenly. Has never happened again (I check regularly now because I’m petrified it’ll come back).

  166. My husband has one eyebrow hair that is the entire length of his eyebrow. I try not to think about it, butsmetimes, when we get close, it catches my eye. If hubby catches me staring at it, it totally kills the mood bacause he knows I’m really just thinking about plucking it.

  167. I have that, too! But I’m hairy everywhere–I have to shave my lower arms/hands/finger, my toes, and the bit right under my belly button. I think my real parents might have been apes.

    Dana the Biped recently posted Hops in the Right Direction: Love, Love, Love (and Training).

  168. I have the same problem! It’s been going on for a few years now. All of a sudden, there it is. I try to gross my husband out with it, but he’s caught on and now won’t look at me when I reach for my forehead.

    I like your unicorn theory!

  169. I use to get this one really thick hair on my left hand. It hasn’t been back in years but I still check. No one wants a strange hair in a strange place.

  170. Oh yes, I, like Ashley above, also bruise way too easily.

    One summer, after clambering about in the garden the day before, I went for my yearly checkup with my OB.

    There I am, legs all a-splayed, and she looks up at at me and in so many words tries to ask me if I’m in an abusive relationship.

    I was totally confused (1: this is happening while she’s about to go scavenging in my nether-regions and 2: we couldn’t have this conversation once I’m seated in an upright position???) When I finally realized what she was trying to ask me, I laughed out loud and said “what??? oh no, I was gardening” as if that totally cleared it up. Yes, the perils of gardening…

  171. You really don’t want me to tell you the weird things about my body. Trust me.

    Wendy recently posted Candlelight Vigil.

  172. One of my front teeth is a tiny bit crooked, so that when pictures are taken at the right (wrong) angle, the shadow cast by the flash makes it look like I’m missing a tooth. D:

    Also, thank you for being so bold as to share your bodily oddity. It’s nice remembering that other people out there are normal, too.

  173. I have really, really, really long toes. In fact, my feet are just plain UGLY. Not that I care, I still wear open shoes and pretend my feat are beautiful.
    Oh and I have really dark armhair. So you can actually SEE it. I’m a girl but I feel like I have manarms sometimes. Which sucks. And my hair gets all pooffy when it rains. I look a like a young boy when I don’t wear make-up (my boyfriend and friends don’t think so, but I do). My arms and legs are too long for my body, and I’m too skinny for my length. I have really long fingers. My nose is really big. I have bushy eyebrows. Sometimes I have hair on my toes, like a guy. I’m a girl damnit. My fingernails are really tiny.

    So yeah, my body is really really weird. I wish I was part unicorn xD No need to feel weird!!

  174. I get two dark black hairs that pop out near my right nipple. I have to pluck them out about every three months.

  175. Sad, cross-eyed nipples from breastfeeding two kiddos for approximately a year apiece.

    Also, didn’t realize this until I started shaving, um, down there, when my husband and I were dating, but apparently I have a furry butt. Which is not fun to beautify.

    Ignorance is bliss.

    Mel recently posted Kumquat.

  176. I have laser hair removal for those bad boys on my chin! Yes I do!

  177. My crazy white hairs appear overnight on the left side of my chin. I blame cosmic rays.

    An ex BF had a crazy eyebrow hair. He would be all fine and POOF there was a 2″ black curl coming out of his eyebrow.

  178. I have the recurring lone chin hair, and reading this has reminded me I haven’t looked for it lately. That means it’s there, lurking. Crap.

  179. I take rat poison on purpose. Seriously, it’s the same stuff they use to kill rats. I think about that a lot.

    Liesl recently posted Small revolutions.

  180. 180
    Kitsune Heart

    Sometimes, when I walk, if my foot falls JUST wrong, I just collapse to the ground. Not fall over. Crumple. Like my muscles are a rubber band and it just snapped. I’ve had no foot/leg issues in the past beyond this, and my response is always to pop back up and keep walking, as if that’s something everyone does.

    I also get sudden forehead hairs. I keep meaning to maintain one and show it to my husband.

  181. that reminds of my nephew.. he was about 10 years old and had a wild white unicorn hair growing in the centre of his forehead. I told him he was growing a third eye and if he plucked it out the eye would go blind. poor kid. he was freaked out for days. what a mean auntie i was. of course now he is wildly successful and rich, so, maybe a the threat of a third eye was just the motivation he needed to be a success. my unicorn hair grows out of my cheek. maybe that’s why i am poor and not successful. sigh.

  182. While I have never had the honor of having a spontaneous forehead hair, I do have one that sprouts up on my belly! Also, you should know that rhino horns are made out of hair, so perhaps this is indeed the start of your unicorn horn. Perhaps leave it next time and see what happens?

  183. I have one of these, only not in the center of my forehead. Mine is kinda off to one side of my forehead, about an inch or so from my hairline. It usually gets about an inch long before I notice it and pluck it. I haven’t figured out how to get rid of it entirely. I wonder why the only solution that gets noticeable results is plucking?

    Courtney recently posted Public service announcement.

  184. I like the unicorn theory. Besides that occasional wispy white hair growing between my eyebrows, I get short spikes that grow in the top of my head. They are really thick hairs that look like splinters. More than a few at once, and they give me a headache.

  185. I have a spot on my back, just over my right shoulder blade, that’s about three inches across and I have no feeling there at all. Seriously, someone could stab me or press their finger there and I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. Until the blood from the former action had dripped down far enough, that is.

  186. Mingled within my normal eyebrow hairs are a sprinkling of massive Alpha Hairs. These bad-ass hairs are like wire, and stick out of my eyebrows like antennae. A regular clipping is needed to keep me from looking like two miniature hedgehogs are sleeping above my eyes.

  187. I’m kind of sad that you plucked it.

    Also, I used to have ONE hair on my left upper arm that would grow to outrageous lengths. When I first found it it was about four inches long. I plucked it, and the next time I noticed it it was a good two inches. For a few years it kept coming back, and then I guess I plucked it enough times that it went away.

    You totally should’ve taken a picture!

    MFA Mama recently posted dumbass.

  188. My sister once pulled a long white hair out of the center of my neck. Every year when it returns, I pluck it, tape it to an index card, and send it to her.

  189. My husband has a single white hair that grows out of the side of his head – right in the middle of his temple. I think his unicorn horn is a little confused. And it’s not straight, it curls.

  190. I have thumbs that are too short. If you google “Megan Fox thumbs”, that is what mine look like. That’s about the only trait that Megan and I share. My thumb nail is about half the length of any of my other nails. Stupid thing is is that my Mom never noticed it. I had to point it out to her one day when I was in my 20’a. That’s what happens when you are the last child in a large family.

  191. I have that too, only it grows underneath my right eye. It’s in the middle of my baggage, and it’s so whispy thin that it seems clear. I’m red headed. The hair pulls put easily. I’ve plucked it 3 or 4 times. I’ve also found one on the side/bridge of my nose once! WTF?!?!?!

  192. I went to high school with a guy who had a 3 inch hair growing out of his forehead. I’m not sure if it was white but it was very light in color for sure. He showed everyone, thought it was cool. We all thought it was both amazing and funny.

  193. So…you’re saying you’re a unicorn?

    Pulling that hair out may have irrevocably diminished your burgeoning unicorn-y powers! DAMMIT!

  194. If you are a unicorn, you are most definitely NOT a jerk.

    Jessica recently posted Snowy Rant.

  195. I chopped off part of my clitoris when I was shaving.
    No kidding.

    To answer your question, yes, it stung like a bitch.

  196. This is, hands down, my favorite internet thread of all time.

  197. 197
    Robyn Funkhouser

    I had scarcely finished reading the words “message boards” when I immediately opened a new tab and launched my own investigation. Scanning down the comments section of the topix.com one I noticed one person referenced finding one on their left BUTT CHEEK. Sooo… yeah, I would say there IS someone out there more OCD than you.

  198. I got an ingrown hair on my bikini line when I was young and uninsured, so I just kinda left it alone and it got weird and swollen and (probably) infected, so I treated it like a whitehead and drained it. All better. Only now (still) there is a weird little divot there in my flesh, like a chuck is missing. It’s about the size of an M&M (regular, not peanut).

  199. Mine grows out of my cheek. It has a darker cousin that grows out of the side of my neck. I hate them with a purple flaming passion.

    jennielynn recently posted Goodbye, Cruel Facebook World!.

  200. I have Velociraptor toenails. But in reverse, because it’s NOT my big toes, just all the others – they grow normally (i.e. flat) for about the first 1/8″, then do a 90 degree turn and grow straight up. I swear, if I left them like that, I’d be deadly playing leapfrog.

    PS- if I ever grow a unicorn hair, I’m going to gel, mousse, and hairspray it STRAIGHT OUT!

  201. I had about a 3/4″ white hair growing out of my cheek one morning. And it was super-sized! Like the circumference of 5 regular hairs. That is definitely what you want to see when you get up to put makeup on for work. NOT. I wasn’t even 30 then. **cries** I can’t even be a unicorn. I’m just a cheekicorn.

    Alisha Jaybird recently posted Blog Award.

  202. I get a single blonde hair on each side of my forehead. Those must be pre-demon horns if your unicorn theory is correct. I also get a stray one next to my nose or on my chin. Perhaps I’m simply hairy.

  203. My immediate thought when I read the title of this post was “because you’re turning into a unicorn!”

    Congratulations on coming to the correct conclusion. Now, can you grant me wishes?

  204. Awesome unicorn lady !! My middle fingers are twisted and bend outwards at the tips.. Like at a 30 degree angle. Its freakish. So in relation, a hair that you can pluck aint so bad ;)

  205. 205
    Katie Pearson

    Rhino horns are made out of hair, so I think you are right on the money!

  206. This literally happened to me the other day for the first time. WTF is it???

  207. I have cysts on my ovaries, which doesn’t bother me. It mostly means I don’t get periods all that often, and I’m all for that. But it also means I have a bit more testosterone in my body, and have to pluck random dark black stubble from my chin and lip.

    So sexy…

    CrissyM recently posted Homonyms.

  208. Random magically blossoming 3-inch long hair? Check. I also have a mole right at the top of my butt crack. I’ve always speculated that it looks like a tiny nose and my butt crack the mouth of a dog. So, I have a cartoon butt.

  209. I have weird crooked peanut toes on both feet. The fourth toe on each is just curled over to the side, reaching for that third toe like nobody’s business. They’re not cute in flip flops. I don’t care. I once had a really long eyebrow hair too. I was sitting at the ACTs when I noticed it. It’s kind of awkward to pluck a two-inch eyebrow hair while everyone else is frantically trying to solve math problems. Took me five minutes to do the math section. It’s called guessing and filling in random answers.

    Allison recently posted A Valentine's Quickie.

  210. I’m pretty sure my car totally thinks I’m fat. Because when I put my seatbelt on (while traveling down the road at 50 mph) I realized that the seatbelt was caught in the door, so I had to use every last inch of that belt to get it buckled until I could get to a stoplight and open the door. And it was really tight. My car’s seatbelt has never had ever last inch used, so I’m pretty sure it was laughing at me.

    Jen @ Jen's Favorite Cookies recently posted Chocolate Cherry Trifle.

  211. I have that as well, and have had it since I was about 12. One long white hair growing out of my forehead just above my right eyebrow. I remember going to the orthodontist and the girl who was working on my teeth said, “Look! This girl has a white hair growing out of her forehead! Just one white hair!” And the other five technicians in the office crowded around to see, and I felt like I was a freak in a freak show, because you always feel that way when you’re 12 anyway.

    Nice to know I’m in good company.

    seasweetie recently posted Photo of the Day: A Dream House in Wales.

  212. 212
    Katie Pearson

    No wait, scratch that.

  213. My husband has one of those in his eyebrow. Every now and then it pokes him in the eye.
    I know, not really fair, because you asked for something about me…. I have a red freckle right in the middle of my nose. I can’t even blame it on WCFields-scale intoxication — I just scratched my nose and it scarred. I call it my Rudolf spot and I hate it.

  214. Pregnancy has made me grow a small beard under my chin. It is not white and it is not sexy. I wish they were unicorn hairs, would make it way more bearable.

  215. 215
    ginger mcpastry

    Growing up I had two very unfortunately placed “bumps”. Moles I guess but not freckle colored. One was directly between my eyes on the bridge of my nose. The other directly center on the back of my neck. My sister used to tackle me and press them both simultaneously to try and take off my head like a vacuum cleaner attachment. Once I was 18 and on my own medical insurance I had them removed. So my head doesn’t come off anymore.

  216. Currently 19 weeks pregnant and I have these big ass varicose veins covering my lady parts. I look like I’m growing a purple fishtail out of my crotch. Maybe I’m becoming a mermaid!

  217. I love all you people. Thank you. I don’t feel so alone now in my ex-tonsil stones and bizarre single chin hair that springs up overnight. I always imaged I felt awfully tired on the mornings when I discovered that bad boy .

  218. And thanks to Paige, I now know have something new to be afraid of — tonsil stones.

  219. I was born with what is called a preauricular pit on both sides of my head. Birth mark of sorts…used to stick earrings in it and freak out my friends telling them it was a hole straight to my brain. Good times.

    Had them surgically removed when I was about 18 or so as they started getting infected. I kinda miss my head holes.

  220. Keith: “Alpha hairs”! I *love* it! That’s the best description of those kinds of hairs, ever

  221. I have random face hairs like that, too. I’m constantly finding new ones.

    I also have freak toes. My big toes look pretty normal, but as the toes descend toward my pinky toe, the toenails grow more and more up instead of out. By the time you get to my pinky toe, the toenails grow perpendicular to the ground. At a 90 degree angle. And my toes are short and fat and so the toenail is sort of smooshed up in there with all my toe fat up against it. The people at the nail salon have to pry my toe fat back to paint it, all the while looking at me oddly and laughing. They only let me come back because I tip well.

  222. I have one black whisker on my cheek. I’m OCD about it too, terrified I will not notice it and pluck it before someone else notices it. It’s a sneaky little bastard. Just like you said, it’s not there, then next thing you know the damn thing is inches long. Sometimes it won’t be there for months, then as soon as my guard is down it shoots out. I like your theory. And I’m always telling my cat I wish I was a cat so I could lay around and be responsible for nothing. Maybe I’m turning into a cat. That would be awesome. Except I would have to rely on my husband to feed me, so I will probably starve to death. And I’ll have to lick myself and puke up hairballs. Not to mention lick my ass which I’m sure taste like shit because I won’t be able to wipe my ass anymore. This always happens to me. I wish for something to happen, then it happens and THATs when I rationalize the pros and cons. Damn it.

    Adrienn recently posted It's almost Valentine's Day!.

  223. I get hellishly ingrown hairs. They snake their way under the surface of my skin and end up being 2-3 inches long when they finally get tweezed out. It’s horrifying.
    PAIGE! (#18) Holy Frak. I thought I was the only one who had to deal with these things! Tonsilloliths. Wow. (Relieved sigh) I’ll just keep swabbing them out with a qtip, then.
    See, Bloggess? You’re helping so many people feel like part of a community. A bodily-function-observant community. In a good way.

  224. I have one, but it’s on the side of my nose. I was pissed someone didn’t tell me, I mean it had to have been growing in public this whole time! It comes back. I call it my “Witchy Hair”.

  225. Were you hungrier than usual when you woke up? It seems like that level of growth would take a lot of energy. You should have lost weight during the night.
    At the very least you should get free pancakes for breakfast to replenish after the growth burst.
    Be safe.
    Eat pancakes. Or bacon.
    Or a steak.
    Maybe, just to be safe – eat all of that.

  226. I hate when they magically appear on my chest. So I guess my dad was right, eating onions puts hair on your chest!

  227. I have a third nipple. I cannot wait for when I have my first child to see if milk comes out of it. If it does, I will probably cry.

    Cait recently posted Trading It In.

  228. I have a weird whisker like hair that grows out of my ear… seriously feels like a cat whisker. Grows about once a month out of nowhere. Well… same spot in my ear…

    jessie marie recently posted Why I don't "celebrate" Valentine's Day.

  229. My weird, suddenly long white hairs don’t sprout on my forehead. They grow suddenly and disturbingly out of my right nostril. There’s only ever one, and it’s always freakishly long and curly. And it hurts like a mother to pluck, so I use little manicure scissors to snip it off.

    Bodies are weird, man.

  230. I’ve had an ingrown hair under my right breast since I was 5. I used to think it was a third nipple and was freaked that I was going to grow 3 breasts. And a very hairy one. It took me to about 20 before I finally asked a doctor about it.

  231. I have a super thick black hair that grows out of a mole on my back. I don’t know it’s there until it gets really long and then since it’s on my back, I have to get someone else to yank it out. So now my husband and my daughter know there’s a witch mole complete with gross hair on my back.

  232. I have OCD as well, and throughout my entire recent pregnancy, my linea nigra (line running down the center of the belly, for those not in the know) was crooked! It drove me nuts the ENTIRE TIME. I can’t tell you how many times I sat there trying to line it up straight by squishing my belly skin :p

  233. My husband has had incredibly long hairs appear in the middle of his forehead twice. It’s crazy!

    He also once had an incredibly long cat hair get lost in his nose. It was in there long enough it built up a decent layer of mucus so when I went to pull it out (I just thought it would tickle a little) he almost fell over. He turned and looked at me and said “I felt that in my BRAIN!” and when he pulled it out it was about 2-3 inches long. So gross!!

    Sarah recently posted Inspiration Boards.

  234. I have a small third nipple under my left breast.

  235. Okay. At first I was all “hahahahah” and then I was all “I’m totally going to vomit and I am going to stop eating my grapes now.”

    But the reason I am writing is to share with you that HORNS are made of the same protein as HAIR! So you totally should’ve left it, because it absolutely was the beginning of a unicorn horn! Next time, put it into a tiny bun, and no one will notice. It’ll be awesome when you’re a unicorn!

    Patti recently posted Happy Snow Day!.

  236. Add another to the list of people with 3 inch long white hairs that come from nowhere – mine appears on my chest from time to time. Looks like there’s enough material here to start some sort of medical research group…

    a recently posted It's looking a little dusty around here.

  237. I had a hair that grew into a surgical incision and the incision healed with the hair in it (don’t ask). When I went to pull it out, it came out of the follicle side but not the scar side. I had to clip it with nail clippers and now it looks like a teeny tiny black dot in the middle of the scar. Super gross. I’d rather have a hair on my forehead. At least when you plucked it, it went away.

  238. Yes, I have the same ailment. I have to do a sideways, wonky head angle to see it so I can pluck it. It grows really fast too.
    I also have a mole that has one hair that comes out of it…and when I pluck it, it’s got to be three inches long. Which makes me wonder how far down that puppy is.

  239. I have one that grows out of my cheek. i can only see it in the sunlight tho, so it gets suuuper long before i notice it

  240. PS, it got a little swollen when I was nursing my daughter but no milk ever came out. :(

  241. Also, reading this thread reminds me of the time my (future, at the time) mother-in-law made me tweeze errant hairs from her cheek. Okay. Barfing up grapes, now

    Patti recently posted Happy Snow Day!.

  242. One grows out of my right cheek (face, not the other kind!) and one by the left side of my belly button. I never see them until they are grotesquely long. One grows out of my husband’s left eyelid. We are all freaks; you are not alone!

  243. I’ve been told its normal and just the natural shape of my forehead, but I have two bulges on opposite sides of my head that had my convinced when I was in high school that I am part triceratops. I tried telling my mom (who is a strict creationist and not evolutionist) that I missed some important genes in evolution, but she dismissed me. To this day I refuse to wear a pony tail or any other hair style that requires my forehead to be uncovered and open to show my families lack in evolution.

  244. Every couple of months I get a chest hair. Just one. I’m not talking overgrown peach fuzz either, an honest to god manly chest hair. I’ve decided to withhold my alarm unless balls come in with it.

    Marcia recently posted Remain Seated - Original Artwork - Acrylic Painting by seriousface.

  245. I get those.
    In the middle of my forehead, or in one of my ears (both get them) or on one of the spots on my back. Luckily I can reach both spots. Oh, and exactly one has come from my elbow.

    I honestly have gotten them so many times it’s become a thing. I check those places most days, and find hair maybe twice a month? I can’t really see them though, so I just sit there pinching around the areas and pulling my fingers outwards. Just in case.
    The ear ones are the unpleasant ones, since you can hear them vibrating when you find them and pull them.

    Oh and I’m only in my twenties (and got these in my mid-teens) so everyone rest assured, this is not a sign of aging. Just weirdness.

  246. I have those same hairs. But one grows by my eye and the other on my chest. They’re random. And now I feel left out because I have two but neither grows out of my forehead so I don’t get to be a unicorn…

  247. Welcome to the secret unicorn club. woohoo

    Kim @ Frog Ponds Rock recently posted Can I finish being sad now?.

  248. You are most definately NOT alone. It’s bad enough that I started getting gray hairs at the ripe old age of 3, and be half gray by my mid 20s and I can definately deal with the rogue course jet black hair that randomly pops up on my chin, but what the shit is up with the long hair that gets fucking LONGER when I pull it out of my cheek? It’s like a cruel attempt at a magic trick and I am not amused.

  249. Limp unicorn horn?… I think they make a pill for that.

  250. I get the same exact thing – but it grows in the middle of my cleavage. My husband originally found it. I look for it often but it only appears occasionally. And just like you, it appears quickly. A few Fridays ago I looked for it, and didn’t find it. Then the next day I was out to dinner with my girlfriends wearing a slightly low cut top. My friend thought I had a cat hair on me, so she pulled it. The hair was attached. It was my special hair. Who I have named Roxanne. She is magical and comes and goes as she pleases. I’m hoping she shows up tonight, a special delivery for my husband on Valentine’s Day.
    http://www.simplyintheflavor.com

  251. Well.. I have two thick, red beard-like hairs growing underneath my chin. I have to pluck them a few times each month. Maybe I am turning into Gimli?

    Nat recently posted How to tell someone that you bled vagina blood on their chair and also stabbed it with a pair of scissors. Twice..

  252. My niece has one blue eye and one brown eye which is totally awesome. I have a perforated septum, which usually is the result of using cocaine over a long period of time, but, in my case, isn’t. And, yes, the odd hairs will only multiply as you age.

  253. I have a golf-ball sized bump along my hairline above my right eye. My husband jokes all the time that it is a horn trying to poke through. No idea how I got it; have had it as long as I can remember. Constantly trying to hide it under my hair. Wish I could pluck it out!

  254. Yeah… I have a thin white hair that gross out of the left side of my nose. Every time I tell people about it they all say the same thing. “What? A hair on your nose? Like a witch?”

    I wish. That would be a lot cooler than a random white hair growing out of my nose. I let it grow once. No magic powers. It just got long enough that I could see it without a mirror.

  255. 255
    Mrs. Page the Library Lady

    Okay yes I have the same unicorn hair thing on my forehead. I have various other hairy parts that are not really something I want to be hairy, hormones are a bitch. The thing that helps me keep somewhat positive is after menopause the hair stops growing on your legs and underarms. At least that is what my grandmother tells me.

  256. I always get hair on my boobs, just around the areola. Not sexy.

  257. Oh, and I also have a weird smell in my nose. It’s like a cross between the furnace going on for the first time in the fall, maple syrup and nail polish remover. I suspect cancer.

  258. 258
    Kathleen McCormack

    1. Single, inch-long coarse black hair just below belly button. Super sexy. 2. Must shave tops of feet and big toes so as not to be mistaken for a hobbit. 3. Nipple hairs (blush). Seriously, wth?? I’m a girl for chrissakes.

  259. For years I had the very gross job of shaping my grandmother’s eyebrows — and she always had me pluck her chin hairs while I was at it. Scarred me for life over body hair.

  260. I have a thin white hair that grows out of my eye lid. It hangs into my eye and I go crazy looking to find the cat hair that must be bothering me. Then I realize it’s my eyelid hair.

    To add insult to injury, it’s hard to pluck out because I have to close one of my eyes to get to it!

    I hope this makes you feel better about your forehead hair. (I get those too.)

    Cris recently posted Zen and the Art of Toast.

  261. I think that posts like this without pictures is the first step in getting one’s blog taken away. It’s like you’re not even trying.

  262. OH. MY. GOD. Never mind the mustache, the chin hair and ok even finding a white pubic hair (at 30! What?!) I woke up the other morning and found a white hair ON MY CHEST. Like 2 inches long.
    From what you and others have said clearly there’s a malevolent White Hair Fairy fucking with us.

  263. I’ve had a long, thin, white hair coming out of the left side of my forehead. My dad gets it coming out of the right side of the bridge of his nose. Did you ever read the book “The Fairy Rebel”? In there, a girl whom was conceived with help from a fairy has magic hairs that grow out of her head and she can pluck them and make magic things happen. Maybe this is what we’re experiencing. Does your mom believe in fairies?

    Visionary Bri recently posted It's Alive! (And Its Name is Gina).

  264. one hair, grows out of my cheek until its a couple inches long and I notice it. The only reason this is strange is I’m one of those uncommonly hairless people – I’ve been accused of shaving my arms because there is so little hair on them. (I don’t).

  265. I have a single dark hair growing out of a mole on my arm. I pull it out, and it comes back every time.

    So no, you are not alone, but at least you have the consolation of being part unicorn. I just have a freaking hair growing out of a mole.

    Natalie the Singingfool recently posted Two Days Before Valentine’s Day.

  266. This happens to me ALL THE TIME. It different places. But my favourite was out of the middle of my stomach.It’s a weird situation but you’re not alone!

  267. I have the “usual” weird hairs in odd places, but what baffles me the most are normal hairs in normal places that suddenly do something they aren’t supposed to. I have straight hair. Not even a curling iron and a can of hairspray will get my hair to curl. But every once in a while, I’ll get a cluster of single-strand spiral curls sprouting from the top of my head. Three or four, like little manic springs. A few days later, they are nowhere to be found.

  268. For some reason, after I drink coffee, my pee smells like coffee. It’s like a Starbucks up in the crapper after I’m done in there. I’ve asked several doctors about it, and they all look at me like I need major meds. Also, after my mastectomy, I have one nipple that has sort of slid downward on my boob and just hangs out there – doesn’t matter how cold I am, that bad boy has no response. It sort of looks like a frowny old man. Oh, and I have this one capillary in my left eye that forms a perfect spiral, like a little cinnamon bun. My optometrist giggles about it every year, and my hubs sometimes yells “Look up!” just so he can see it.

  269. I get dog hairs stuck in the skin of my foot – and I can’t walk on my foot until I get it pulled out. Hurst like a big ole huge rusty needle with apple cider vinegar on it. Or I think that must be how it would feel since I have never had an apple cider vinegar laced needle in my foot.

    Happy VD day….. Valentines day, you know, I just like calling it VD day for the shock. I’m 47 and still like those childhood pranks.

  270. I had one grow out of the side of my nose. Just like you. One day not there and then BAM next day inch long white hair growing out of the side of my nose up by my eye. The only thing missing was a nice big witches wart! Plus side was once I plucked it it never came back.

  271. Forehead, eyebrow extension, and neck white hairs, all random, all overnight. All creepy as shit.

    AND, one single brown, upward-facing, neck beard hair. I pull it, it starts regrowing immediately. Apparently, my tomboy ways have forced the smallest microbeard. Guess I need to wear pink more often.

  272. limp unicorn horns (since that’s what we’re calling them now) suck and i hate them. but, mine have not yet grown out of my FOREHEAD. usually they are in my eyebrows? masquerading as normal eyebrow hairs??? so, i’m less unicorn than you? what the fuck? and why? my sympathies, bloggess. it won’t get better.

    monica recently posted I'd rather say "I love you" with clean undies, but that's probably just me..

  273. I woke up one day and had a ginormous blue vein running down the center of *my* forehead! Not something you can pluck! I mean, I guess you could but there is a risk of dying. Julia Roberts has kind of a veiny forehead, but on her it works somehow.. She looks like a thoroughbred pony. In a good way.

    RachRiot recently posted You're Welcome, Manuel.

  274. One single solitary white hair that grows on my back (kinda like on my flank). Freaked the f out when I found it the first time. Now I know if it starts itching it is long enough to yank out. My husband doesn’t even know about this. I’ve named the hair Rodrigo. Thanks for letting me share my secret.

  275. Omigod. 30 comments in and I’m laughing so hard I’m crying. This is fabulous! And oddly comforting. :)

    Liz D recently posted What I Wore Wednesday.

  276. 276
    Mikki Blueyes

    Asking an OCD person what’s weird about their body is sort of cruel. The question is, what is not weird about my body… well you asked, so:
    – my eyes are not symmetrical, so my right eye is way more in-set than the left one, to the point that people think I have a lazy eye, and my eyeshadow creases only on one side
    -i’m so white i’m practically albino and can’t tan, only burn
    -i have hairs that grow on my face too, but they grow coarse like whiskers, so they bug the hell out of me and I have to pluck them the second I can grab them with tweezers
    -my skin looks like a raw plucked chicken, with little tiny bumps all over, and you can pick at these bumps if you really wanted to – it takes great strength for me not to
    -I have moles all over, but one particularly large raised one (wart-like?) right beside my “lady-parts” – gonna be a nice surprise for the next male that comes a-callin’
    -I have eczema on my feet, and hammer toes

    Pfft, and you’re upset about one hair! It’s just your sexiness oozing out… too much in one night and it all started to sneak out through your hair.

  277. Because you have made me feel less alone, I share this story with you publicly. At work, I was looking in the mirror tying my hair back into a pony tail. And there was one stubborn hair that I couldn’t get to tie back. When I tried to pick this stray hair off my chin I realized I couldn’t because IT WAS ATTACHED. To my chin.

    A long black chin hair, discovered midday at work, which was long enough to pull back into a ponytail.

    Mind you, I have friends and family and even people who I was fond of at work that I saw that day – yet no one said a damn thing.

    The only reason my boyfriend got a pass is he screamed, “NOT HARRIET!” when I told him the story about why I was crying and tearing the house apart for tweezers when I got home. I haven’t been right since.

  278. I had to share this post with my husband who is at work. (I like to try and make him snort while laughing so he gets funny looks from co workers. Im a special kind of asshole) Any hoo, this was his response:

    She should let it go. Wouldn’t she have magic and stuff? Of course then Victor would be like
    “Charlie…Charlie…Let’s go to candy mountain!” And she would get all pissed cause it would be annoying. So it’s probably better to pluck it.

    Just in case you don’t know the reference….

  279. I have two extra nipples. On my stomach. For the longest time I thought they were just moles, until my dermatologist informed me that they are in fact vestigial nipples. I have come to embrace them, but it does make you feel like you haven’t made it quite as far up the evolutionary ladder.

  280. My mom barely has eyebrows or eyelashes, and she’s a brunette with green eyes and dark skin. I am a pasty, blue-eyed blonde. There are a lot of blue-eyed blondes in the family tree, but they all seem to have the melanin I lack.

    On my father’s side, they’re all dark-eyed brunettes with dark complexions. Sicilians.

    The only thing I got from my father’s family is a preponderance of blonde fur. My eyelashes are long, my eyebrows thick, my body hair dense. If I weren’t blonde, I would frighten small children. Thankfully, I am blonde.

    I refer to my neck area as ny nanny goat scruff. The thick, plush, wooly white hairs that grow there are terrifying.

  281. I’ve got one that is black and grows out the side of my knee. In the immortal words of Wayne Campbell:

    I’m a little older and a little wiser.
    I’m starting to get hair in really weird places.
    I feel like I’m turning into Sasquatch.

    That’s life!

    jesspants recently posted SNKR after midnight.

  282. Every couple of months, I’ll be brushing my hair and the brush will catch and my ear will hurt. Then I’ll know it’s time to brush my hair straight back away from my ear, call my husband into the bathroom, and resign myself to 1/2 hour of “HOLY SHIT YOU HAVE A SIX INCH WHITE HAIR GROWING OUT OF YOUR EAR.” Then he plucks it, and we are able to resume eye contact within four to six hours.

  283. I have a recurring hair, one hair, that grows to the left of my left nipple. I pull it out, and all of a sudden one day it’s back.

  284. Right upper-arm. Above my lip. I’m unaware of others.

    Please let there be no others. Or if there are, let them migrate to my forehead.

  285. A few years ago I discovered a very thick, black hair growing from my side, just above my waist line. I pluck it out, it comes back. It reminds me of “The Fly” for some reason. Anywho, I refer to it as my side pube. You are welcome.

    Mahala recently posted A Visit From Asylum Royalty.

  286. It get mysterious white hairs popping out of the side of my thigh. I usually pluck it, i wonder if i left it there if it would turn into a horn. It would be weird to have a horn coming out of my leg.

  287. 287
    augiehelgeson

    actually have this same problem but it grows out of my upper left cheek!! but I first discovered it when i was 7 years old!! they do grow back but very sporadically and infrequently. Mine has come back only three times the last 20 years. what the shit jenny your only JUST NOW finding your magic hair?

  288. As you can see, it happens to everyone, and all our friends and colleagues are dicks for not clueing us in.

    And I have a long dark hair that grows on the side of one of my ears. Like an old man hair. I am fucking vigilant about that damn hair.

    Maura @ Eve Was Partially Right recently posted Rice Flour Conversion Chart.

  289. I went to my doctor to have a mole looked at/removed because the edges were all light and funny and irregular and hello! Cancer! It below my boob just right of my sternum and he looked at it and then he said he wouldn’t remove it because he thinks it’s a nipple! A vestigial nipple, which makes no sense because dogs and pigs have rows of nipples, not primates so apparently I’m a highly evolved dogpig, not a chimp like everyone else. Also, I still have my mole-nipple-cancer and no one will take it off.
    So you can feel better about your physical proof of leadership of the Unicorn Success Club, because no matter how hard I google there is no Dogpig nipplecancer success club. I feel so excluded.

  290. I have one that grows out of my right shoulder blade. I’ll feel a tickle and go to scratch my back…feel the hair that I ASSUME fell off my head, and then pull it and feel it tug. It grosses me out every time. It’s like a clearish white and always like 2-3 inches. Where does it come from?!!?

  291. My husband and I both get them. We call them mutant hairs, but I like the unicorn idea too. I’d rather be mutating into a unicorn than the abominable snowman.

    Also, our kids are screwed.

  292. 292
    Dorothy Gardner

    All of these responses are leaving me in tears from laughing so hard….now I have to go pee..

  293. When I was 16 I had all but two of my teeth knocked out in a car accident. The dentist said that I had to wait for the swelling in my gums to go down before he made impressions for dentures. When I went back to get the impressions made I had new teeth growing. It took about 6 weeks and a lot of pain, but I grew a third set of teeth. Not nearly as need as the unicorn thing.

  294. Awesome, I can’t even do Unicorn right… because my long white hair appears under my right eye! So, not only will the regular people shun me, but so will the unicorn people.

    cursingmama recently posted Proper bed usage..

  295. Well, now you WON’T become a unicorn because you PULLED YOUR HORN OUT!!! GEEZ!
    If it does come back I vote you keep it attached and we wait a year to see if it becomes a unicorn horn.

    Tina, Escrow Goddess recently posted This just needed to be shared!.

  296. I got that once. It was a weird, freaky spindly hair. I think it’s what happens when follicles die. I yanked that sucker out, it was so weird!

  297. Been there, plucked that. One time I had a horn like “thing” growing out of my forehead that I plucked as well. It reminded me of a cat’s claw (like from a feline not that prickly bush). Since the cats are locked out of the bedroom at night I knew it wasn’t one of them embedding their claw in me and walking off.

  298. Coincidence? I think not. Today’s LivingSocial daily deal is for 6 hair removal sessions — you can “Bless Your Skin with Silky Smoothness.” It’s an 89% savings … only six days left to take advantage of the deal ….. If I can get three friends to buy the deal, I get it for free … We’re all friends here, right?

  299. I have a ninja hair that grows out of my left lower jawline.
    It’s completely colorless. I can only nab it if I feel it, and hopefully I haven’t been unaware of it for too long and can tweeze it before it’s super long.
    I always ticks me off because it’s A FREAKIN’ NINJA HAIR.

  300. My husband had an extra (meaning, totally one more than he was supposed to have) tooth that grew out of the very middle of his top palette. So, thanks to you, I now realize that he was just an inside-out unicorn and I will proceed to tell all of our friends this amazing fact. Cool!

  301. OMG, this post is cracking me up!! I have one grey (white) eybrow hair that seems to appear overnight, and sticks out like your unicorn hair. I’m perpetually plucking it. And my husband has a recurring long black hair on the side of his nose. He looks like a catfish.

  302. I have rorschach test freckles on the inside of my elbow. There are four of them – two on each side, and when I bend my elbow they match up almost exactly. When I bend my arm, I like to think that they’re kissing, but I’m a freckle romantic like that.

  303. Whatever you do, do NOT look up Cutaneous Horn syndrome

  304. I have one that grows out of my cheek. Stupid unicorn horn coming out the wrong place…

    Kim recently posted Adult dating.

  305. A few weeks ago I thought I had a pimple on my forehead and it freaked me out because I’ve never really had acne, but when I investigated the situation further (read: popped it) it turned out to be an ingrown hair, which is far worse. So I think I probably should have had a three-inch white hair in my forehead, but instead took the weirdness to a whole new level.

    Amanda recently posted Random Adventure Wednesday!.

  306. When I was a teenager I had this weird SUPER thick hair come out on my upper arm. Naturally I plucked that motherfucker. IT BRUISED! I had a three inches dark blue bruise from plucking a fucking hair.

    My thumbs? Two different shapes. Entirely different. One is short and has this crazy wide nail The other? Normal and a good quarter inch longer than the other one.

  307. I once stressed myself out so much that I gave myself weird itchy foot blisters INSIDE my feet. I looked this up and it is something called pompholyx. It is horrible. It makes you look like your feet are made of itchy Swiss cheese with very tiny holes. If you pop the blisters you will be SORRY because they leak fluid and itch even motherfucking more, which you would not think is possible, but it is. The only thing to do is wait until the little fuckers go away, since there is no help for it other than using a bunch of anti-itch creams. I got a ton of athlete’s foot cream and finally I found one that worked. GOD that sucked. Stress is a bitch, yo. I’ve never had it before or since *bangs on wood*. I’d take rogue hairs any day over that.

    Adrasteia recently posted Happy Valentine's Day!.

  308. i have a really hard white hair that grows out of the side of my face near where a guy might have sideburns (i’m a girl, no sideburns). like 2 inches below my hairline in front of my ear. i usually catch it before it gets really long, but it’s oddly thick, hard, and colorless :-/

  309. Ooooo, I’ve got you beat. I get a three inch long hair that grows out of my nose. I pluck it and the fucking bastard always grows back in a few weeks. It’s like that ex boyfriend in college that kept stalking me.

    Nikki recently posted Hola, me llamo Nicole.

  310. I have one that grows high on my cheekbone. It is very thin and fine.

    You were right. I googled long white hair on face and there are a lot of posts. Not that I didn’t believe you, just wanted to read for myself.

    We are not alone.

  311. Wow, it’s amazing that all these people have similar hair instances and yet only three sites.
    *YOU* need a site that shows up under the search – Am I turning into a unicorn? because I can promise this is the most traffic a possible unicorn mention, has ever received.

    My weird body share – I get clear pubic hairs. Or I did until laser hair removal.
    Also, I have inverted nipples.

    Love that people on here are so honest and willing to share.
    Love you people.

  312. I had a short white wire feeling hair 9well i think that’s what it was) growing out of my arm. I had to struggle to pull it out of my arm for a while and when I did it was about 1/2 inch long and the bottom was double the width and shaped like a candle stick holder. I seroiusly almost passed out in class. It didn’t seem natural. I think it was a locator that I pulled out and now the aliens cant find me. :) I also have the white whispy hair that shows up out of the blue on my check.

  313. While I was pregnant, I got this weird purplish blotch between-under my boobs. I thought it was a random bruise or something. This was close to two years ago AND IT NEVER WENT AWAY. Stupid unsexy blotch.

  314. My hubby has a coarser longer red hair in his dark brown eyebrows. We named it Manny. Sometimes Manny gets plucked because he is too rogue and stabs me in the face. But Manny always comes back.

  315. Found one on my earlobe last week. More like one-inch, but still.

  316. it’s one of those days when i came here to be reminded that depression lies.

    i have a hair that grows out one side of boob.

  317. One little hair? I have feet that are so flat that after I get out of the shower, make “kissing”noises because they suction themselves to the floor for a second. High heels are out of the question…..I look like Daisy Duck with them on.

  318. As the Grateful Dead said. “Oh well a touch of gray, kind of suits you anyway.”

    Smokeynall recently posted The First Goalie Post..

  319. I have Exploding Head Syndrome, also known as hypnagogic auditory hallucination syndrome. In which I hear something akin to tessla coils exploding in my head when I’m trying to sleep. But they aren’t real sounds and no one else can hear them. I can also FEEL them and they make a bright flash of light go off behind my eyelids. Seriously, look it up. Feel better?

    Cassie recently posted wordless wednesday.

  320. I have pretty quick growing chin hair. Which is quite distressing as a 25 year old girl. I gather that it’s not entirely uncommon, but I still dislike it quite a bit. There’s a small part of me, sometimes, that wants to just let it grow to see how long it would get, but it would make for a really awkward looking beard.

  321. I am 34. I have had “grey” (grey my ass…they’re white) hair coming in since I was 21. And it’s not like it’s in like one streak like Rogue from the X-Men either. Yeah, I have a streak… it grows right in the middle of my head. Just the middle. No where else, nothing. I look like a skunk. I’m NOT KIDDING. Especially with me dying my hair borderline black these days… verified complete and total skunk.

    Thankfully, once they start coming in, I can just stop parting my hair down the middle and part it off to the side, call my stylist and get some relief. I don’t think I could live without my stylist at this point…

  322. You want weird? I’ve got weird!

    One day, I noticed a small twinge of pain in the ball of my left foot when I walked around the house. On examining it, I saw a small black spot.

    I figured I had stepped on something like a splinter, so I made an effort to remove it. To my surprise, when I got to it with tweezers and pulled, out came a thick, black hair, about 2 inches long, with kinks in it from where it had folded back on itself under my skin.

    I felt a small tug when I pulled it free – clearly, it had actually grown from the bottom of my foot. As you did with your unicorn hair, I googled, and found that a surprisingly large number of people had also found long, black, in-grown hairs on the soles of their feet.

    My next question – if your white hair on your forehead makes you a unicorn, what does the black hair on my foot make me? I’m too tall to be a hobbit!

  323. 323
    Nathan Blevins

    You are not alone! I have one of those that grows out of the left-center of my forehead randomly. Its not there for months and then, suddenly, *poof* its there. Of course, my wife finds this hilarious and attempts to pluck it from my face when I am not paying attention. On my side, I am a little scared to remove it b/c I figure that is probably like a hydra and 3 more hairs will grow back for every one plucked.

  324. Oh, where to begin. The hairy toes that need to actually be shaved in the summer? I could shave them in the winter, too, but really, why? Or there are the eyebrows that would grow clear down to my eyelids if I didn’t pluck every other day. But I’ve saved the best for last – I have to clip my pubes about once every three weeks. I swear to all the gods who ever were that if I didn’t I’d have a dread (because I sure as hell am not going to comb them) on each side hanging to my knees by now. I clip off at least an inch a month. If the hair on my head grew as fast as my eyebrows and pubes I could make a living off growing it out and selling it for wigs. I suppose I could always grow the pubes out and sell them, but…..

  325. I have a heart shaped uterous. And my ears don’t line up so my glasses sit lopsided on my face. Thank goodness for contact lenses.

  326. 326
    mydogfartswhenshebarks!

    The comments are coming in so fast I can’t keep up!

    These are hilarious! I can’t stop laughing. My favorites are #69 and #120…I stopped keeping track after that.

    I have rogue hairs in moles and skin tags in weird places, but I don’t have any nasal hair what-so-ever. Never have…it’s natural to have hair in one’s nose. Without it, all kinds of junk gets sucked up there when we breathe. I am constantly sneezing and comforting a runny nose. Everyone thinks I perpetually sick. I want nose hair.

  327. 327
    Cynthia Jokela

    Okay, here’s my weird thing. Several years ago, I tripped over my brother’s now deceased dog while she lay in dark hallway. I had been telling my mother that I couldn’t see well in the dark and it took this incident to finally convince her to put a night light in the hallway. I plunged head-first into the bathroom door frame so hard that a chunk of wood came out. After this incident, I had a dent in my forehead, which I still have almost 4 years later. About a month after, a film of downy white hair started growing in the dent, which is just to the left of my forehead, about an inch below the hairline. My smart-ass brother said it’s was evolution’s way of protecting my skull, by growing downy hair in the dent to protect my brain. So now I have to shave the dent AND I keep my hair cut in bangs all the time.

  328. My ‘Lil Miss sees the white hair in my goatee and wants to know when I’m going to die. (sigh….)

    Jason
    The Cheeky Daddy

    Jason recently posted Valentine's Day - 2013.

  329. FML – if you’re turning into a unicorn, I’m turning into a wild boar with these tushes of mine.

    mrtl recently posted Tapping into My Inner Super Woman.

  330. I hate toenails for this reason, and this reason alone: the nail on my pinky toe grows straight up instead of forward, because my pinky toe is all messed up. When I was younger I used to really hate that toe, but as I grew up I started feeling bad about it, thinking that the other toes must be really smug and self satisfied and all “you are the shunned toenail, freak.” To feel better I started pretending I hate all toenails in general, just so the pinky toe wouldn’t feel bad and so the other wouldn’t bully it. I repeated the lie too many times. Now I really do hate them all.

    Amelia recently posted Annoyance (a love story).

  331. A large section of my hair on the front right side of my face is a completely different texture than the rest of my hair. It’s like someone else’s hair is growing there. My stylist says she’s never come across that before. Also, I have so many birthmarks that a doctor once asked me if anyone in my family had Elephant’s Man disease. Only he used the medical fancy name. I spent months examing my head to see if my bones were growing rapidly.

  332. Oh I’ll give you weird. I have a vestigial gill. In my neck. That’s right, a gill. (technically it has a big long medical name but let’s face it, a gill by any other name…) And it leaks spiderman web stuff. It’s super sticky, and when you try to pull it out it gets all over one hand and then I use the other hand to clean off my first hand only it all just jumps over to the second hand. It’s totally disgusting. I would gladly take a unicorn horn over a gill.

  333. Well, I certainly hope you feel better now after reading everyone’s maladys. I know I do, as I have a huge flat spot on the back of my head (and both of my daughters do, also, but not my son, hmmm…), I have the wispy 3 inch hair that appears high up on my right cheek, the side of my nose, my shoulder, or my upper arm, the awful black hairs that appear on my neck and chin that do appear overnight, and a host of other issues I won’t even begin to go into. But you might find this funny – several years ago, we went on vacation to Mexico where the locals braided my girls’ hair and put beads in them with fishing line (a la Monica of ‘Friends’.) So we were on our way home, one of the girls says, “Mom! You have fishing line in your hair! Did you get yours braided too?” So I am feeling around on my head all perplexed and such while the hubs is laughing his ass off. Yeah, just gray hair. They hadn’t seen it before. I am now regularly scheduled with my colorist.

  334. I have one of those hairs that comes out of my chest, just below my collarbone, every so often. So weird. I don’t know whether to be proud of it or bothered.

  335. That once happened to me…except it was out the side of my freaking boob! What the heck universe? Calling me a tit-head and turning me into a unicorn all at once?? Yeah, that’s way worse than a normal unicorn horn! Way worse. I blame all those times when I listened to old farts who told me to eat strange foods because “it’ll put hair your chest”. I thought that was just a figure of speech. Clearly, it’s not. (thankfully that was a one time deal for me)

  336. Elaine #304, my younger sister has the thumb thing, too! It’s like, if her thumbs were putty, someone just PUSHED DOWN on the top of the left one and it spread. She call that thumb “Shtumpy.”

  337. I have large fatty lumps on my scalp. One is positioned slightly to the right of the middle of the back of my head, which causes me to not be able to lean my head directly back onto a surface without discomfort. I permanently have to rest my head looking left.

  338. I was born with extra functioning organs…apparently I did absorb my twin. YEAH ME!

    JENN recently posted Love, War and Death in 1861.

  339. I have odd pigmentation around my left eye that showed up at puberty and 4 white eyelashes.
    I wear make-up but it somehow never quite covers the lack of pigmentation.
    maybe they are unicorn eyelashes

    linny recently posted Vintage Mattel Barbie Case-The World of Barbie-1968-Hot Pink by linbot1.

  340. I have webbed toes. I passed it down to all three of my children. My youngest really only has 4 toes on each foot because of it. Not only am I weird…but I screwed up my children too. Top that ;)

  341. I’m apparently turning into a cat… I always get this one really long white hair that comes out of my cheek… Never had the forehead one… Unicorn :-)

  342. My face is apparently lopsided when I’m tired. I had no idea until a few weeks ago when I happened to look in the mirror and notice one eyebrow was a good inch higher than the other. I was kind of startled and told my husband to look. He just said “Yeah, your face gets a bit….asymmetrical when you’re tired.” Nice of him to let me know…

  343. If it makes you feel better, my husband is part unicorn too. Not like that, don’t be a perv. He grows a random giant white hair out of his forehead whenever he thinks I’m not looking. Then I go get the tweezers and attack his eyebrows.
    Nope, we aren’t weird. Really.

    Tammy recently posted random crankiness.

  344. I have a rogue white hair in my left eyebrow. Having seen my dad’s facial hair I’m pretty sure that when I hit 50 it’s suddenly going to transform into a giant ginger eyebrow.

    Also I have a little extra bubble of skin on my left ear – it’s kind of pointy, so maybe it’s a confused sideways unicorn horn?

    I’ve had two grey streaks of hair (like a badger) since I was about 25.

    Oh, and I bruise like a peach. I once got a massive bruise which ran from my shoulder all the way to my wrist, as a result of a bell-ringing accident. My doctor said it was the best bruise he’d ever seen. And I had to give a presentation to 30 police officers about domestic abuse the next day. Which was … interesting.

    Marjorie recently posted R.I.P. Tybalt 1998-2013.

  345. I get a long white hair that grows out of my cheek. I stroke it like a beard hair and my husband is always trying to get me to put a bead on it. Like it’s some kind of damn corn row.

  346. My eyelashes are turning white. I’m not a very pale person and it isn’t grey and I have no grey hairs in my actual hair…..Just very weird random white eyelashes.

    Cassie recently posted Hell yeah! Got my roses! Happy Valentine's Day.

  347. The color in my eyes is slowly flaking off and floating around the back of my eyeballs.

  348. 349
    mydogfartswhenshebarks!

    So far I have spent all day reading your hilarious blog…I’m not getting anything else done!

    PEOPLE ARE FREAKY! AND GROSS! #319? EEWWWWW!!!

  349. GREATEST POST OF MY LIFE.

    I have had a white hair growing out of the center of my head and I’ve known about it for 10 years! Why? Why is it there? I may never know!

    But more importantly, I am not alone!!!

  350. But the best part is when you pluck it out with tweezers and find out that the root of the damn unicorn horn is IMBEDDED IN YOUR BRAIN!!! Damn that hurt ;o) (seriously – how long does the root of the hair have to be?!)

  351. I had one of those!!! It was like fine fishing wire COMING OUT OF MY FACE. Good times.

  352. I was a late bloomer who instantly started getting little old lady whiskers. Added to my hobbit feet, and spontaneous 3inch white cheek bone hairs (that totally spawn overnight -__- ), I’m just a ball of sexy.
    Ugh. Wine time o/

  353. I had one growing out of my right upper arm when I was in high school. First time I noticed it I thought it was a loose thread on my shirt. So I started pulling on it but it felt like it was connected to me. So I look and it’s a 4-5 inch long white nylon looking hair coming out of my arm. I pulled it out and it came back 3 or 4 more times but then it eventually stopped. I kind of miss it. It was wonderfully weird.

  354. Wellllll. I have a reoccuring 3 inch long blonde/white chest hair… SO not cute on a womans chest.. and it regularly gets found by friends who are being helpful removing a stray hair… try and pull it off and its STUCK!!! OMG!
    WHY do we have these? I feel like my body is going alien on me

  355. Just the other day I wished to be a unicorn. My wish came true for you…Don’t mess it up!

  356. my mom still has vestigial gill slits in front of her ears from the fetal amphibious stage. How cool is that? They don’t actually work underwater though which is a serious bummer.

  357. In my ongoing battle not to look like a pimply faced teenager (I’m 27) I use a face wash and take B12. What I have learned is that I can for the most part, keep the pimples off my face. This means that, instead of just having less pimples, they just form in different places. Like the underside of my jaw and behind my ears. Why god why?

    Holly Folly recently posted I am the Champion of the Washing Machine..

  358. I totally get those- on my right cheek. Out of fucking NO WHERE.

    Heather recently posted floss.

  359. I once had a sewing needle in my toe for 6 months and didn’t know it.
    You’re welcome :)

    Melissa recently posted My Radical 80s-themed 30th Birthday Picture Gallery.

  360. I have one of those but it grows out of my left boob a couple times a year. I really hope it doesn’t turn into a horn! That would make me a bad hugger. Or a super villain.

  361. I have an eyebrow that produces a super long eyebrow hair periodically. One day, no freak hair. The next day, it has grown an inch and curled around itself. This always disturbs me. Also, because of some nerve damage (a boring, long chronic-pain of a story), my left hand sometime moves of its own accord. I totally know what it would feel like to be that guy in the movie where he gets the hand transplant only its the hand of a murderer that strangles people and it tries to strangle him. Well, except my hand just gestures vaguely. So far.

  362. I fear I am not as fortunate (to be a unicorn that is) for it appears I am a goat and have recently found a 3″ lone hair growing in the middle of my neck. I thought I groomed, I try to look somewhat put together, but my body is constantly conspiring against me and now I am becoming a goat. Good luck with the unicorn transformation- at least it is magical and more glamorous than a goat.

  363. Grey hairs that grow overnight are never fun, no matter where they are located.

    Mexmom recently posted Scared much?.

  364. I have little body hair which is great cause I only need to shave my legs & pits twice a year…..but I’ve had a three to four inch hair grow just below my belly button since puberty. I yank it out periodically when I think about it.

    I spent the summer of my 17th year laying on the beach in my yellow & white gingham bikini. Oh yeah I was hot 43 years ago….except for the 4 inch black hair growing just below my belly button.

    I was sipping a Coke from a bottle listening to “Help Me Rhonda” on my sassy blue transistor radio, when a random cute dude bent down to tell me how gorgeous I was…..or so I thought….instead he yanked that 4 inch curly out with his teeth, spat it out, & walked away without so much as a hello!

    About a week after that mortifying experience, that cute dude told me he thought I was cute too…..we had a lovely 3 year relationship. Then we grew up….

    Every time I look down & see that hair, I remember those days with tenderness…..
    Then I yank it out.

  365. I get a white hair that grows out of my upper arm from time to time and I also have a hair that grows out of the top of my nose. Not inside, but on top of the tip, you know? Anyway, you can’t really see it, but every once in a while I notice it and pluck it.

    And you are definitely not the only girl who does the whole checking out your face extremely close up thing. And I’m not even OCD…I think.

  366. Holy crap. I just did the same thing last night. My Rebel Forehead Hair is white AND freakishly thin – much like a Heroine Addict. It just thinks it’s a Rock Star which is why it refuses to obey the rules.

  367. I had a 2 in. long hair on my cheek….my cheek!!! Also I got my first gray hair yesterday…I am 25. I freaked which in turn I’m sure caused more…fml

    Nickie recently posted Love you guys!.

  368. This isn’t about me; it’s about my husband, so it should make us both feel good!! He has a very smooth chest with just one hair that grows out in the middle. Whenever I comment on it, he gets self-conscious and pulls it out. Then it takes a few days until it grows back. Well, today I noticed there are TWO!! I think it have taken about 5 years. I’m afraid if random forehead hairs are anything like random chest hairs, it might take a long, awkward-looking while for you to completely turn into a unicorn.

    PS Thank you for using the word “shit” on twitter today. I was worried I would have to un-follow you for not being offensive enough.

    Rabia @ TheLiebers recently posted My Valentines.

  369. For no explicable reason I occasionally get salt in my eyebrows. Thought it was dry skin until one day I licked my finger and smoothed down my eyebrows, licked again, and wow, that’s salt! Googled it, and it turns out there are a whole bunch of us saltines out there.

  370. 372
    Agent Banana

    That’s happened to me. Twice. Right in the middle of my forehead and once on my neck. I still check from time to time. I also have a wiry black hair that grows right on my jaw line. Just the one. Right in the corner. Tweezers are my best friends.

  371. I get these all the time. Some are soft and wispy, like kitten fur. Some are hard and wiry, like a pirate’s beard. They are random: belly, behind the knee (that one not only grows overnight, it curls!), jaw line, neck and cheek. And the nipples. Oh, the nipples. It like my eyelashes are absorbing into my body and escaping through my boobs.

    And if one more nail lady recommends I get my upper lip waxed, I’ll go postal. I swear it.

  372. I get those. One on my shoulder blade & another on the side of my forehead. I think my unicorn genes are a little confused. Or maybe my body is being taken over by multiple alien unicorns. I’m never sleeping again.

  373. How is there so many posts so quickly? It’s going to take forever to read them all! As for your unicorn hair/horn- I don’t think you need to be concerned until you start pooping rainbows! It is just another sign of your awsomeness!

  374. I get one that grows directly below my septum. It’s white and curly and more often than not I end up yanking it out.

  375. Ever since I was in my 20’s…I would suddenly, randomly find a two to three inch long white hair growing on my boobies. left side..down and under. right side, smack on the nipple. When I was single and dating, I checked EVERY day for fear of choking a boyfriend! Not too mention the whole “what the fuck, I’m dating a werewolf” factor the disgusting discovery could cause! Like every one else…no hair, no hair, no hair…BAM…2 to 3 inches overnight. I’ve been married 10 years and thanks in part to my diligent self exams…my husband has no idea these hair exist!! Unicorn on!

  376. I have the EXACT SAME THING happen to me every few months. The hair is super fine and I can actually pull it easily, but it grows overnight. I shit you not.

  377. In addition to a freakish amount of body hair woes (I think my ancestors might have been sasquatches… sasquatchi?), I once had this hair that was somehow just under the surface of the skin on my leg, like an inch long that I only noticed because it hurt. Somehow a fraction of the end was poking through the skin, so I took tweezers to it and it just slid out because it wasn’t actually attached to anything at all. IT WAS JUST SITTING THERE BEING A HAIR. UNDER THE SKIN. And then when said hair was extracted, there was bleeding. Convinced it was my twin and I’ve just now made you all accomplices after the fact. YOU’RE WELCOME. <3

  378. Jen – I am in fact a unicorn. I have what’s called an osteoma (non-scary bone tumor) just slightly off centre of my forehead. And it’s the size of a marble. One of the regular-sized player ones, not the big whopper ones. It’s been growing over the last 10 years. Depending on my mood, I call it my unicorn horn or devil’s horn. Love that you’ve joined the unicorn ranks. We’re so happy to have you! :)

  379. Yup, I get those too. Mine grows out of my neck. The best thing about getting old is that when it does show up, it’s now white instead of black and almost invisible. What makes mine different is that instead of being 3 inches long, it’s only 1 cm but as thick as 10 hairs put together.

  380. I have one on my neck/chin area that grows 3 inches over night about 3 times per year at random! its very fine almost invisible. I also get one that is thick and coarse that grows BLACK on my elbow! And 1 super long arm hair… just one. I am so excited that I’m not a freak. OK fine I am a freak but I’m not alone in my freakyness!!

  381. I can see this is such a difficult time for you with the transition and all.

    If you’d like an edible arrangement or some shit like that, let me know. I’ve never sent one of them and always have wanted to. Maybe they will shape the fruit with some human, some unicorn, and some humcorn (human and unicorn mix, duh). -k

    That white girl recently posted Some people can pull it off, I can't.

  382. 384
    Connie Scott

    I woke up and found a hair by my nostril. I tried to brush it away only to realize it was attached to the inside of my right nostril. It was long, black and evil looking (b.t.w., why are the rest of my hairs coming in white but this one shoots out of my nose like a swamp snake) So not only was it crawling out of my right nostril, it was able to curl around and was making a mad dash for my left nostril. OMG, I did not want it to go up there. It might have tried to breed and then where would I be. Running around my world looking like Gene Shalit, that’s what. Oh, NO, NO, NO. I think NOT! I have very little control over the strange and disturbing things that are happening to my body but I was not going to allow that massive hair to take up roots and find a mate in my left nostril. I pulled that sucker out. It hurt like hell but I am in control of my destiny!

  383. I’ve got about 5 unicorn horns growing out of the top of my head. I can do that right?

    onSanity recently posted happy non-lover Valentines Day.

  384. Wow, it is like a circus of weirditude, a real life old-school freak show. Love it. Um, how can I compete?? Well, I have an extra bone in my foot, one that has no real purpose except to stick out like a big ugly bump. Not as weird as everyone else, but still.

    Steph@livingbrilliant recently posted Feel the love.

  385. Where to begin in my body oddities…?
    *My bellybutton is an inch off center.
    *I have partially webbed toes – on one foot.
    *My ear canals are perfectly straight, rather than the curvy, protective way they should be. If you look into my ears, you can see my eardrums.
    *Tilted uterus
    *Only 4 of my teeth actually touch each other. I have an overbite, a crossbite, and an openbite. The only way to fix this is to break my jaw, reassemble it so that everything lines up, then wire my jaw shut to let it all heal. I opted out.
    *I have many of those freakishly long hairs… but mine don’t grow overnight. I’m very pale, and the hairs are very light. One is under my (off center) bellybutton. The first time I discovered it, it was about 6 inches long. I also have one on my arm, on the bridge of my nose, and on my elbow.

    Sara Shelton recently posted 2012 – A year of suck, in review..

  386. 388
    Heather Greywolf

    One time when I was in my 20’s, I felt something (that I swear came out of nowhere) inside my shirt that was rubbing against my back and irritating it. Closer inspection revealed that (whatever it was) was actually STICKING OUT OF MY SKIN and rubbing against my shirt … not the other way around. I had my boyfriend look to see what it was and he told me it was some kind of hair. I asked him to pluck it out and when he showed it to me, the damn thing was about 1/3″ long, solid white and THICK like a tiny porcupine quill … which makes sense, I guess, since it was on my back.

    So apparently … I’m a magical porcupine?

    Though I think I may have inadvertently deactivated my magical porcupine powers by plucking the hair out, as it never grew back again.

  387. We men get such a kick out of doing this to ya’ll.

    It freaks you out for days.

    And it’s payback for the times you threw away our old underwear with all the tears.

    We loved that underwear.

    HogsAteMySister recently posted Humor During Lent?.

  388. Allison – I think having a black, limp unicorn horn makes you the anti-unicorn…or the evil unicorn of doom, which is equally cool. Wear those limp horns with pride I say, black or white.

    And as for strange body things; toe hair. I think I have hobbit ancestry.

    Laura recently posted Play It Again.

  389. I found one in between my shoulder blades , about the same length. I have to get hubby to deal with it when it grows back, coz I can’t reach the damn thing. Also last week a one inch doozy on my left cheek. Great……

  390. I have so much facial hair I’ve given up on tweezers, and now just have a shave in the shower every night. If I didn’t, within three days I’d look like Graeme Garden from late 70s episodes of The Goodies when he had enormous lamb chop sideburns.

    Alverdine recently posted Pagan Blog Project: Dogs.

  391. My navel leaks. I’d never met anyone else who has this, until one day in my late 20s I randomly met a girl on a bus and, don’t ask me how we got on the subject because I have no idea but hers does too. Her doctor told her that it sometimes happens when the hole between your insides and outsides doesn’t seal properly after they cut your umbilical cord. So my guts are slowly leaking out of a pinhole in my stomach.

    There, don’t you feel better?

  392. OMG…my all female office just had this conversation recently! I found a HUGE white hair growing out of my hip. Sigh..

  393. Try having a third nipple… just saying

  394. My husband once said “hey you have something stuck to your back” and proceeded to grab what he thought was a long hair that fell from my head until I yelped and he realized it was a long white hair growing out of my back. He didn’t think I was turning into a unicorn, but a werewolf.

  395. I have a bunch of little bumps (cysts, I guess) all up and down the insides of my forearms. I had one taken out and biopsied and they’re benign. I’m just lumpy, I guess. You wouldn’t notice them unless I told you about them, but once you see them you can’t un-see them.

  396. welcome to the club. i’m an ex member now because for some reason, i stopped getting that 3″ white hair – ahem, unicorn horn. but only after YEARS of plucking. sometimes, when the light catches it just right, it’s like a beacon.

    Ann recently posted we were living it up at the hotel oklahoma.

  397. I once found a three-inch long hair on the back of my thigh near my knee that had somehow evaded shaving.

  398. Im so happy there are other women out there that have this…
    One night me and my boyfriend were getting ready for bed and I noticed a 3 or 4 inch white hair coming out of his forehead…we both thought it was weird considering we had both never noticed it before so he plucked it. Two minutes later he was putting lotion on my back for me and noticed a 3-4 inch white hair on my back and had to pluck it. We just assumed we were meant for eachother and now we do random white hair spot checks!

  399. Mine appeared around age 21, and as with the rest of my life, is slightly off-center (on my forehead.) I check for it every day when I put on lotion, but not once have I discovered it before it was three inches long. It’s magic fucking unicorn hair. I have attempted to fashion it into a little curli-q, to no avail. There is also one on my forearm, which I only see when I notice someone else notice it. Hey, you could create a market for tiny wee bows to tie on them. Start a fashion trend! And sparkles!

  400. I have many possibly weird body things! I have a very coarse, clear hair that appears from the center of a tiny mole on my chin. I keep checking for it, all the time, because I too have OCD. I have to wait for it to get a little length before I can tweeze it, and when I do, it feels like I’m ripping my face off for a split second. I guess it shows up every few months…and then there’s the nipple hair. Or I guess areola hair? Whatever, I get dark, coarse hair growing there, about 10 around the right, 15 or so around the left. Yes, I’ve counted. I’ve shaved them in the past, but it made me nervous, being near my nips, so I took to plucking them out, post-shower. Sometimes they grow back under the skin, and I see them there, mocking me, growing all sideways. When I’m single, like now, I just let them grow! They’re at the half-inch mark right now! I also have over-exuberant hair growth around my vajay. The hair there is long and coarse and grows out onto my inner thighs. I trim them, and sometimes Nair them off, if I’m planning to wear a bathing suit in public, and one day, I’m gonna have them lasered off because that is just too much hair! I have “princess skin” and get red marks that last for months and months from cuts or burns or acne; I’m apparently allergic to the adhesive in Band-Aids and get red marks everywhere when I use them, except my finger tips, which last for weeks; I’m allergic to something in Neosporin now too, and get an allergic rash if I use it anywhere except my fingers…I also have bunions. And moles on my tummy that when connected together, form a series of triangles. And a pointy head.

    I feel better sharing all this with strangers!

  401. I had a transparent mini-horn-hair that grew overnight in front of my right ear (like fiberoptics!), but after I plucked it, it never came back. It DID leave a hole in my face, though, so there’s that. And my mom has a huge witch mole by her nose, which I am now getting, too. At least it matches my hideous pointy nose. I’m developing an appropriate cackle to go with them. Since I was born on Halloween, I guess I’m just fulfilling my destiny. On second thought, maybe I should have cultivated the crazy transparent hair-thing.

  402. I have a kidney shaped birthmark right above my kidney. Coincidence? I think not.

    scripto recently posted Bye Bye Bene.

  403. I have had one of those strange little hairs growing out of my chest right above my boob. I have no idea why it’s there and it grows almost over night! So strange. Glad I’m not the only one with weird things going on…

    Devon S recently posted It's the little things.

  404. I occassionally have a miniscule ‘horn’ that grows in the middle of my left palm. And then there is the cluster of ‘nerve bumps’ that appear on my left buttock or near my tailbone whenever I get stressed about things. They itch and are very painful to touch. I think they’re the virus leftovers from a bad case of strep I had over 30 years ago.

  405. Holy shit I have the same thing but it happens on my neck. ON MY NECK!!! What the shit does THAT mean? There’s no cool animal that has horns in it’s neck, right? Even Satan’s horns are on his head. Ugh…I never do anything right. LOL.

  406. I have found one of those long white hairs on my face, too, but out the side of my cheekbone instead. Which means I’m turning into one of those deep water angler fish, I think. Totally not as cool as a unicorn.

    Summer recently posted Valentine’s Giveaway: WRITE Local Love!.

  407. I have witch hairs growing out of my chin that I’m totally OCD about. I also lack a tricep muscle in my left arm – I was born in the 70’s.

  408. I can’t do push-ups because my elbows come out of their sockets. Like, way out. Definitely more distressing.

  409. Jenny, you and your fans are fantastic! I have a red birthmark on the nape of my neck, so when I wear my hair up, people can see it. Some have called me a true “redneck”. Funny thing is, I was born with this (42 years ago) and my father just noticed it last month.

  410. I have a three inch long white hair that grows out of the side of my arm, and when I just looked down it wasn’t there anymore so… that might be mine. Sorry!

  411. You should have put a hair curler in that shit and owned it.

    Stephen Battey recently posted Google is an asshole..

  412. As oglaf.com (NSFW PLEASE DEAR GOD THINK OF THE CHILDREN WHAT THE FUCK NOT IN THAT WAY DAMMIT NSFW) reminds us, with a picture of a dead man with a circular puncture clean through his forehead, “As final thoughts go, ‘Unicorns *are* real!’ is kind of an awesome one.”

  413. My husband has one of those! I pull it out for him occasionally, but I feel bad because its like I’m killing his magic.

  414. I get random freckles for no reason in odd places. I’m hardly ever in the sun anymore, but I’ll still wake up to get dressed and realize- hey, is that a new freckle on my vulva? Okay fine body, do whatever the hell you want.

  415. Congratulations on your impending unicorn-ness! But you might want to stop plucking it out, your horn will never grow long and spirally if you keep yanking it out by the roots.

    Kellie @ Delightfully Ludicrous recently posted And the new leader of the geeks is....

  416. I have one white eyelash. It never falls out. So, my unicorn horn is totally growing in the wrong place. Bummer.

  417. I’ve had long, dark red chin hairs that stick out both sides of my chins since I was about 18 years old. I spend so little time looking in the mirror that I’ve often found myself out, about to go to a meeting or on stage, and realized they are long enough that I can twist them into little spikes. On my head, I have blonde-ish hair. It’s super obvious.

    Renee Rigdon recently posted Suffering Bastard.

  418. lol my husband has the some thing! But his were jet black and very noticable and sometimes grow in paches.

  419. But what I want to know is, have you pooped any rainbows yet?

  420. I have vitiligo, which can also affect hair follicles, which means that random patches of my eyebrows/eyelashes/facial hair turn white. Not individual hairs, scattered in a manly, salt-and-pepper stubble way. Spotty, photo-negative-of-a-dalmatian patches.

  421. 425
    Lisa Victoria

    I love this tribe.

  422. When I was in high school bacl in the 70’s I had one that would pop up overnight. I just pulled it out after doing it 3 times over a period of 4 or 5 yrs. I have never gotten another one I guess I got to the end of it

  423. I see there are at least 2 other velociraptor-toed people on here, along with one triceratops, and I must thank you for helping me find my kin. Insert Land Before Time theme song!

  424. You are definitely becoming a unicorn and I am so jealous.

    Lovelyn recently posted Happy Valentine’s Day.

  425. Ok, I have a similar hair that grows out of the middle of my back. I had no idea that it was there because I had the eye in the back of my head removed some time ago…I discovered when I was at the pool with a friend and she thought it was a stray hair FROM MY HEAD that was just sitting on my body (because it had been there so long that it was about 10 inches long at that point) and tried to pull it off. I yelled OW and jerked away…yes that was awkward and very embarrassing. I have to have my husband pluck it when it grows back, which it does every few months, because I can’t reach it.

  426. I had a 2-3 inch long white hair growing out of my arm once. amazingly long! I was impressed but pulled it out. I just assumed I was part werewolf.

  427. I HAVE ONE TOO! and on on my cheek

  428. I was crying because I just graduated from nursing school and I can’t find a job and WHY DOES NO ONE WANT ME!?! when I read this and it made me laugh out loud and totally cheered me up. I love you.

    Fun body fact: My belly button is off to the right by at least an inch and a half. Always has been. Now I’m 12 weeks pregnant (which totally contributed to the aforementioned crying) and I can’t wait to see what it does over the next few months. What if the disparity grows with my belly and it winds up at like 2:00?

  429. 433
    BlackBetty67

    The following list is limited to hair growth only. Several in either nippular area, a random spindle-like hair that grew to the left of and slightly below my right shoulder, several on my chin, one (and only one) in my mustache area, right side, one random methuselah eyebrow hair that I SWEAR grows overnight. That last one has grown 2 times, was discovered and removed moments following discovery. Sadly, I didn’t know to question whether there was unicorn DNA involved. Damn!

  430. All the time. My right cheek only. I’ve grown a bit fond of them. What are you if your horn grows out of your cheek?

  431. I have two of those, one on the back of my shoulder and one on the back of my upper thigh. And my sister has one on the back of her shoulder, too. I used to think they were awesome, but now I’m jealous of you because I don’t think ours are unicorn horns, just weird, strangely wispy, long white hairs in spots that are hard to reach.

  432. Oh my god I get those too and I thought I was hallucinating or incredibly unobservant. Also, I get ice cream headache in the middle of my spine instead of my head. Right about where my bra hooks, hideous aching agony, no explanation. My doctor’s never heard of it.

    Nara recently posted In which I talk about serious shit because it’s my blog and you can’t stop me..

  433. 437
    thebewilderness

    I had one of those only it was on my wrist. This was before the internet so I could not look it up and find out I was not alone in my weirdness. I have no idea what the significance of having a unicorn horn on my wrist is. I am worried it might be dinosaurish rather than unicornish.

  434. Yep, big white hairs growing out of the side of my neck from time to time. Good times.

  435. Almost forgot. I inherited a fabulous trait from my PawPaw. He had one GIANT ear and one tiny ear. And they were positioned in completely different spots on each side of his head. Luckily mine are roughly the same size but the right one is almost an inch lower than the left one. The guys at the optometrist always go, “Huh. Did you know that your ears. . . . ?” Yes, yes I did.

  436. I have to cut bangs into my hair now to hide the deep fucking wrinkles that appeared out of nowhere.. oh.. and I have mostly gray hair and I’m only 32 with NO kids. wtf.

    Jaime recently posted I did some organizing!.

  437. I found what has been deemed a ‘rogue’ hair growing out of my left bicep. It was approximately 2 inches long. I think it appeared due to my super human strength.

  438. Ok so I didn’t get chicken pox until I was like 25 – during winter break from grad school no less – and I got the damn spots everywhere and they were horrible and itchy. The worst by far was right on the tip of my nose and as you can imagine it took weeks to heal so everyone was like ‘hey, what’s up with the crusty nose?’ Except nobody dared to say it. So I’d preemptively say I was recovering from chicken pox and they’d be like ‘suuure’. Because it happened during winter break when nobody was around, and how many people get chicken pox at 25?

    I still have a divot there today. And a huger divot on my forehead near my right temple, from another chicken pock. All the damn pox spots left scars that are visible today, over 15 years later. And yes there were some where the sun don’t shine. I’m too scared to check if those scars are still visible too.

    Now I have rosacea so I’m sure everyone’s like – ‘so, how’s that drinking problem’ because my nose and cheeks are red all the time. And of course I don’t drink…but I’m not going to preemptively bring that up because, well, how do you think that will go over?

  439. I had a random black hair grow right on the side of my nipple…. Like… Right ON my nipple…. I don’t have hair on my chest, and I’m female… And it was overnight as well…. WTF!?! I’m jealous of your unicorn awesomeness… I have no idea what a black hair on a nipple would make me…

  440. Yowza. After reading everyone else’s posts, I’m not going to complain about my tonsil stones. O_O

    Jessa recently posted Patent Malarkey.

  441. 446
    Amelia Jaxon

    Add me to the “random black hair growing out of my neck for no reason” club.

  442. Since becoming pregnant, I have acquired white hairs all over my belly….totally not sexy!

    Bailey recently posted Sweet Pea photo drop.

  443. Weird Thing About My Body: No matter how much I eat, I NEVER gain weight…kidding:) Please check out my blog…it is brand new: http://brokenhallelujahbook.wordpress.com/2013/02/14/everybody-knows/
    I also have a book, but I won’t bore you with that. Happy Valentine’s Day!

    leanne tankel recently posted Everybody Knows….

  444. The Odd Life of Jenny Lawson

  445. Well, I can’t say that I’ve ever grown a white hair overnight, but I can say that my dental hygienist complimented me on having a big accessible mouth the other day. I couldn’t be more proud!!!

    Michael Rochelle recently posted It’s All In The Mouth.

  446. I have a chin hair. I first noticed it when I was about 22. It was black and I’d pluck it as soon as the tweezer could grab it. Over the years, it seems to have lightened to a blondish color. So I let it grow out kinda long. When I’m pondering something, I stroke my chin and then grab the chin hair and pull on it. I find it makes me feel like I am intensely meditating…until I get distracted estimating the length of the hair and if its time to pluck again.

  447. I had a skin tag on my right nipple. The doc had it tested just to make sure it wasn’t a wart.

  448. OK, now I am sad that I don’t have long hairs growing overnight. It might be gross, but it is pretty amazing the body can do that! I just have a mole that will slowly grow gross hairs on my cheek. A bunch of them, it is pretty nasty. I pluck them when I feel them coming back in.

  449. I have a hair on my arm that grows freakishly fast and is like three inches long. A single hair. Luckily my arm hair is blonde so I don’t care, and it’s weird because when I pull it, it comes right out. But that’s probably more than you wanted to know :)

    Emily recently posted This one has midgets!.

  450. I am a touch weirded out about all these tales of long-ass hairs growing overnight. Um..how is that possible? I have so many unwanted hair problems. If they start coming in overnight, I’m screwed.

    hazlnutt recently posted And for you, dear other person with a heart of gold….

  451. I have a black cat who has two white whiskers. One has fallen out, and grown back white. A couple of days ago, I noticed a white hair on her cheek. I tried to pull it, thinking it was a loose hair. It wasn’t. She didn’t like that to much. And it isn’t a hair, it’s a whisker. But, an incredibly white stripe on a very black background – so very obvious. It must have popped up overnight. Just like your, and so many others, mysterious hair. Nevermind that she’s a feline.

  452. Yeah, that happens. I had one sprout on my neck in my 20s when I was getting electrolysis on the short black hairs and the technician didn’t know wtf was up with that either. One day, I noticed a co-worker had one growing on her cheek. But she was a bitch, so I didn’t say anything.

    Jen Anderson recently posted Open Letter to Inaniminate Things That Need to Fuck Off.

  453. 458
    Connie Scott

    I brushed a hair from the side of my nose. Turns out is was connected inside my right nostril. It was long, black and evil looking and why, when all my other hair follicles produce white hair, this comes storming out of my nose like a swamp snake. Worst part was that it was curling into my left nostril. This could not happen. Maybe it would go up there and find a mate. Can nose hair procreate? I could have been walking around looking like Gene Shalit, for heavens sake. I can’t control the evil changes in my body but this hair was not gonna win. I grabbed my tweezers and yanked it out. It hurt like hell but I was, for once, in charge of my own destiny.

  454. OK I take peoples temperatures on their foreheads because we live in the future like the Jetsons and shit and some people have NINE HEADS forget five headsand that….nine heads even 11 heads. RIDICULOUS ok i am doneeeeeeee

    Cyndy recently posted On Love.

  455. I’m double-jointed in my left thumb, but not the right. When I discovered it, I thought I’d broken it, somehow.

    I had my gallbladder out when I was 20. Most people don’t get gallstones until they’re in their 30s, at the earliest.

    On the subject of hair, I frequently and randomly grow a freakishly long, skinny blonde hair on my arm, near my wrist. And my facial hair is peach fuzz, except where it grows out of the mole on my cheek. That’s coarse and black. I pluck it, of course.

  456. I have a mysterious white hair that magically appears on my right shoulder. It isn’t there at night and then POOF, the son of bitch appears out of nowhere and hangs out in my peripheral vision until thehubby can pull it out. True story.

  457. A thick, black hair grows out of a freckle on my left cheek every few weeks or so, and I usually don’t notice it until it’s like an inch long, after everyone else has probably noticed it. Also, my second toes are longer than my big toes.

    Tiffany recently posted Dress #3.

  458. I had one of those damn hairs that I could have stuck up my nose – or go fly fishing with. My 17-year-old said my chin makes me look like a goat. The little shit was right though.

    The bad news is – you reach a certain age and you can’t see them, at least until someone, like your teenage son, points them out to you.

    Denise Malloy recently posted When Cupid Makes You Stupid.

  459. I get one of those in black on my left arm one every couple of years. Recently, one of my eyebrows went rogue and got to about 3 inches long before I noticed it. I have lots and lots of little pigmentless spots all over my arms and legs, and they’ve recently started migrating to my face. The grays are everywhere. My pinkie toenails are teeny tiny and grow pretty much straight up. One dark nipple hair that always goes ingrown. So much body weirdness. xo

  460. I found one of those on my ex-husband’s forehead about six years ago.

    You guys are not alone. It freaked the shit out of me.

  461. I have one of those hairs on my stomach. It gets super long and always grows back. So, apparently it is TOTALLY NORMAL!

  462. I have this one white hair that keeps coming back under my jaw, I keep plucking and it comes back. I forget about it and one day I catch a glimpse and it’s like a foot long! Well really only a half inch but it feels like a foot! So you are not alone and now I feel better because I know I am not alone too!

  463. My husband has the EXACT SAME HAIR!! I’ve been calling him a unicorn for years now :) I’m a little jealous that you both have this awesome horn coming in and all I’ve got is a white birth mark. I do tell people I’m part albino when they ask about it.

    LacquerNinja recently posted Sweetheart Manicure.

  464. So, I have had this happen, except the hair was on the side/front area of my stomach! I’m almost certain it wasn’t there the day before I found it…it too was about three inches long. WEIRD. This has also been something that I found on my arm too. Glad I’m not alone, weird as it is!

  465. Air comes out of my eyes when I blow my nose. I think thats weird.

  466. I have marks on my cheeks like I’ve been crying where I get very sunburned, but right above them, on the curve of my cheekbones, I have freckles and skin which never really tans. It looks really odd!

  467. 472
    Stumpsandbeans

    My thumbs are shaped like short squat incandescent lightbulbs. In ninth grade, when Bone Thugs In Harmony were popular, my friends called them the “puggish nubbish thumbs” and my droll set of opposables had their own minor cult following. Sorry that your horn was thin, flaccid, and defective, and that you had to amputate it. In the end it’s probably for the best.

    Stumpsandbeans recently posted Per usual, a blog entry with excessive overshare and very little adherence to typical western social boundaries.

  468. Had a great big mole on my lady parts my. Entire. Life. 29 years. Then, last year, it disappears. Overnight. If that wasn’t freaky enough, my gyno was “very concerned”, but she never did anything about it…

  469. 474
    Lady Macbeth

    ERMAHGERD! I have “tonsil stones” and until reading above, had NO clue that there is a word for it or that others suffer from them as well!

  470. I get weird long hairs that grow on my arm and chin. I always pull them out. I also get these weird super thick hairs. they never get very long but are thick and hard. There are probably unicorn horns, but never on my forehead. I guess I’m deformed!

  471. Of course I have the usual moustache and unibrow, but I also have hairy toes & feet. And I have to wax my armpits, no joke. Oh and the third nipple, that’s weird right? Luckily it never developed like the other two, so at least there’s that :)

  472. 477
    Lady Macbeth

    Oh, since somebody mentioned adult acne (my dad still gets pimples, he’s in his 60’s, I got his oily skin, and I expect I’ll be getting zits for the rest of my days), here’s a brief interaction from work the other day:

    Me: [smiling as I always do when greeting the next-in-line] Hello. How are you today?
    Female customer: Are you ok?
    Me: [slightly confused] I’m sorry – what?
    Female customer: Your face… it has the red bumps all over it.
    Me: [miffed silence for a second]
    Female customer: [raising an eyebrow] Did you not know?
    Me: [tersely] It’s acne. Adult acne.

    I wanted to tell her it was smallpox (since I’ve had others mistake it for chicken pox, and some think the dermatitis on my forearms is poison ivy rash). But I didn’t.

  473. 478
    Kristina Cline

    I have a regular smooth pair of shoulders, but every other month my right shoulder sports a eyebrow length and eyebrow thickness hair. And it completely looks like a misplaced healthy eyebrow hair, growing out of my shoulder. Hair is weird.

  474. 479
    You're Not Alone

    My sister and I both get the unicorn hairs; her’s from her hip, mine from the back of my shoulder. My sister and cousin discovered mine at a wedding…..while we were sitting next to the bride on the dais. My sister thought it was some old relative’s hair that fell out when she hugged me, but when she went to brush it off it was stuck…then she pulled it, and about three more inches came out before she could pluck it from the follicle… Apparently my unicorn horn is retractable!

  475. Maybe, like plucking hairs, plucking a unicorn horn just means it’ll come back thicker and longer the next time?

    Nicky recently posted In which I rant about theatre.

  476. I have four nipples, but the extra two don’t have areolas and are not lined up properly. They look like little moles below my breasts.

    When I was a teenager, I had a really bad, really painful zit on my back. My mom popped it and spent 5 minutes cleaning it out but after she did, a pebble popped out. THERE WAS A PEBBLE IN MY BACK. I called it my pearl. You’re lucky you’re a unicorn. I’M A GODDAMN OYSTER.

  477. I totally have a skin tag….. ON MY NIPPLE. Yeah, I’m not trying to tie it off with silk thread to get rid of it. IT’S ON MY NIPPLE DAMMIT.

  478. Ya…I have a hair like that on my chin…it will not die and I have to be on guard ALL. THE. TIME. Because it doesn’t make it any better on your chin…seriously.

    The Redneck Princess recently posted When Postal workers go bananas….

  479. I grew like a cat’s whisker on my upper lip. It was super thick and hard and clear. Maybe more of a quill. I pulled it out and it was 2″ long UNDER my skin. So when I pulled the little hair it it just kept coming and coming. I also grow long curly hair on the back of my thighs by my knees. It will just appear several inches long. It’s hard to shave the back of your thighs. I also have to shave my toes. I’m hairy like a hobbit there. It was embarrassing. I used a new razor the other day and slice the top of my toe knuckle. I was getting a pedicure and she asked me about my scab and I told her I cut myself shaving and was really embarrassed. I’ve loved reading everyone’s weirdness! (Seriously WTF tonsil stones? I never knew you existed and YouTube educated me. Pretty gross.)

  480. I once pulled a 6 inch fine blond hair out of my sisters neck, i could see it floating in the sunshine. She was 16. God only knows how long it was growing there unnoticed.

  481. When I was younger I used to get this weird discoloration on my neck and chest any time the weather changed from season to season. They kind of looked like leopard spots. (and by kind of I mean they probably didn’t to anyone else but I told myself they did cause having leopard spots would have been awesome). Then I stopped getting them for some reason. Which is probably a good thing because if they had stayed I’m pretty sure my brother would have tried to sell me to the circus eventually.

  482. Wow. I came here to tell you that I have white hair growing out of my scalp, on the left side..and I thought that was weird because I’m 23. And then I started scrolling down and reading the comments so…yeah…I feel weirdly normal. :P

  483. That totally happened to me not long ago! Good long hair just appeared overnight. Didn’t think to document it or Google it. Huh.

    Tracey recently posted My Original Coming Out..

  484. I love all 480 people above me. My tourettes like shouting of “skittlefarts” when I sneeze in completely inappropriate places seems so sane now!

  485. 490
    MysteriousAliWays

    I used to get the one, random, long hair in the middle of my forehead thing when I was in my twenties. It would suddenly appear out of nowhere every so often but I kept plucking it out and eventually it stopped growing.

    Over the next couple of decades, it has appeared at the right side of my waist, on the right side of my face and in the middle of my forearm. Last seen growing out of my upper arm, just a bit down from my shoulder.

    I’m kind of intrigued to see where it will pop up next.

    Also, half my left eyebrow is white, so it looks from a distance as if I have half an eyebrow.

  486. I have these tiny white bumps underneath my eyes. They look almost like pimples, but they’ve been there for the past 8 years, and I have absolutely no idea why.

  487. I have a permanent lump on the roof of my mouth, supposedly because the doctor suctioned me too hard at birth. I also am missing two joints: both of my knuckles closest to my fingernails on left middle and ring finger. I can crack my ankles on command. My hands are two different sizes. Wow, I reread this list, and I’m fairly sure I shouldn’t’ve reproduced.

  488. My hair is taking a short cut out my nose instead of taking the normal route out the top of my head….

  489. I have black spots on my eyeballs. Yes, This post really made me think. They are supposed to be birthmarks? My grandmother had them too apparently….

    Miss Gee recently posted I Don't Even Know Anymore!.

  490. @Louise — Those are milia — tiny benign cysts. See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milium_%28disease%29

    I have those on my eyes, chin, & [TMI] groin & freaked out about them until I found out they’re totally normal. The ones on my chin sometimes get infected though, which isn’t fun. I also had an OB/GYN try to treat me for genital warts — you’d think the dude with one hand [seriously, creepy in a doctor] would know about them…

  491. I have a giant thick hair that grows out of my neck just under my jaw. It’s damned hard for me to see, even harder to tweeze.

  492. For the past few months, I’ve had this big gross-looking brown…………oh wait, nevermind – it washes off.

  493. I have a thick black hair that grows out of the scar on my chin. I also don’t have a rectum….or large intestine.

  494. I have a re-occuring zit on my back. At least I thought it nwas a zit until In realised it might be some kind of infected gland. Oddly enough, my auntie has the same exact thing in the same exact place. Obviously mother nature wouldn’t let me inherit her speedy metabolism.

    Linnea recently posted A Friday list of loves and likes.

  495. I’m pregnant. Everything about my body is weird.

  496. I had a really weird, really small skin tag on my nipple that I really wanted to cut off, but my husband told me I’d die (it would hurt) so I didn’t. Then it turned black and died so I did cut it off finally, just yesterday.

    The tag thing, not my nipple.

    My nipple is probably fine. Just confused about itself.

    If my nipple turns black and I have to cut it off, you will be the first and probably only person I’ll tell.

  497. How about a 2″ long, curly hair in your outer ear? That wasn’t there yesterday? Probably just a guy thing. Or eyebrows you could do a combover with?

  498. I have this long, thin, almost clear hair that grows out of my neck. My partner calls it my ‘whisker’. It won’t be there for months at a time and then one morning I’ll wake up and it’s there! I also have a single white eyelash that occasionally shows up. It’s longer than all my other eyelashes.

    I think both of these are my inner albino trying to escape.

    Kaitlyn recently posted Freelancing Fun!.

  499. If I let water stay on my skin for more than a minute or so, I break out in hives. I am allergic to water and sweat. Showers are not fun.

  500. I AM SO GLAD TO HEAR THIS. For years I have had a 2-3 inch hair that sprouts out next to my belly button overnight. It happens every few months. Mine is very fine and blond though. I always kind of liked it, even though I pluck it immediately.

  501. Artist Adrian Piper saves personal bits of hair, fingernails and skin in jars and installs them on shelves in an ongoing series called “What Will Become of Me. . . ” Your plucked hair, er um, unrealized unicorn horn, seems like the beginnings of a conceptual art piece to me.

  502. a white eyebrow hair. that just seems wrong.

  503. First, I love that there are nearly 500 hairy comments. Sharing. It’s a beautiful thing. Sort of. Second, nipple hair. Third, three in white hair growing out of the top of my foot! And third, now that I’m in my forties a full facial wax seems the only way to go.

    Hope recently posted Happy....

  504. When I woke up the other day and coughed and it burned my whole chest insides I thought (hoped) that I was morphing into a dragon.
    Doctor said that is NOT what’s happening. Apparently I just have the flu.
    This is why I don’t like doctors.

  505. I have one black hair on my left elbow. And my birthmark? Is shaped like a heart. On my cheek.

  506. I recently discovered that my fiance (who is in his 20s) has a RIDICULOUS EYEBROW HAIR. I’ve been with him for four years, and I just noticed it a couple of weeks. ago. WAS THAT THERE BEFORE? I have no idea. I fully believe it came out of nowhere. His has his normal eyebrow, and then there’s this crazed eyebrow hair, just one, that is WHITE and is LONG. Like, an inch. IT IS WEIRD AND CREEPY AND THANK GOD HE PULLED IT OUT. I just can’t marry someone with a creepy eyebrow.

    Dawn recently posted DISPOSABLE CAMERA SWAP #1.

  507. I luuuurve that there are so many comments for this!
    I know this is long but it’s worth it so stay with me. A friend was at a wedding once and was introduced to someone. She spotted a hair on her dress and tried to remove it for her only for the woman to say ow! and then she realised it was attached to her nipple. Not only was it about five inches long but it had managed to winkle through the fabric of her bra and dress. I know why this woman doesn’t remove it. I would be proud of it too and lie in bed stroking it at night. I bet she has a name for it.

    if you want to you can now find out about whether you are a putter or leaver… http://blunderbussme.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/putters-and-leavers/

    Blunderbuss recently posted Putters and Leavers.

  508. Oh and also I used to have a tooth growing out of the middle of the roof of my mouth. It only took four years of hardcore dental work including braces, elastics, springs and hooks resulting in zero social or love life and long term mental scarring throughout my formative teenage years to sort that bad boy out. Now my teeth are all in places where teeth should be.

    Blunderbuss recently posted Putters and Leavers.

  509. I have a white hair that grows out of my right cheek. The longest it’s ever gotten is about half an inch. I always pull it out when i find it, and it always comes back in a few days. It’s on the corner of my cheekbone, almost at my temple. And it’s super thick and stiff, like a beard hair.

    Also, i’m 23 and have no grey hairs at all yet. Just this one white one on my cheek. And i do have an old-lady mustache (thanks, German ancestors!) that i take care of every week or so, but it’s dark brown/black and not beard-hair-textured. The only white hair on my entire body is the one on my cheek. Explain that one, science!

    Diana Lark recently posted metaphor.

  510. You sound hot.

    moooooog35 recently posted I think you're fundraising wrong..

  511. I had a lump on the top of my head and the hair that grows out of it is curly (rest of my hair is straight). Drove my hairdresser crazy! Had it for like 20 years then over the course of a week it dissapeared and hair straightened. I kinda miss that lump-I always blamed it on so much brain matter that I had to have an addition on my skull to accomodate it.

  512. Count me in the Weird White Hair Success Club. I’ve been getting laser hair removal for the last year because thanks to PCOS, I was gifted with a lot of dark facial hair. No more, though. However, since having all that nastiness evicted, either the white hairs that weren’t man enough to emerge are starting to make themselves known, or the remaining dark hairs have said, “Hey, lads, let’s go albino…it’s the only way we’ll survive”, organised, and decided to pop out in random places all over my face. I’ll be sitting in church, absently rubbing my neck, and I’ll feel this stiff, wiry hair go SPROING against my finger tips and think, “Oh gods, Harold’s back again…bet he brought his brother Marty with him…” and sure enough, back there on my jawbone next to my ear, I’ll find Marty and hear him quietly snickering, “Gotcha again, slagbucket…”

    Siress Yorkie recently posted Of Dishwashwers and Discoveries.

  513. One day my face decided it needed more colour. So it grew a bright red freckle, right in the centre, on the tip of my nose. Then it decided it liked my nose and decided to live there. It can’t be frozen off without leaving a scar in the middle of my face, so instead, I’ve named it Fred.

    Vicky recently posted An 18th Century View.

  514. Since I had babies I no longer grow armpit hair. Hooray!

  515. I have one of those too. About an inch above my right eyebrow. It appears every few months and, like yours, seems to show up overnight. In fact, I was JUST complaining to my husband about it on Tuesday “Why the hell didn’t anyone tell me I’ve been walking around with a giant hair sticking out of my forehead all day?? I’m probably the laughing stock of my office. Freak!”. Needless to say, I nearly spit out my drink when I saw the coincidence of your post. In fact, I read it aloud to my husband who simply responded, “Oh, you’re turning into a unicorn? That’s a relief. I was worried it was heading down the path of abomidable snowman. Cool.” :)

    Kyra recently posted Recipe - Garlic Lemon Shrimp with Linguine.

  516. I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!? Holy. Crap. You just made my day. Every once in awhile I’ll notice this wispy hair protruding from the center of my forehead and I’m like wtf? Its plucked and then I forget about it. Haven’t had one in awhile but holy crap we’re twins.

  517. Wait til you hit menopause, honey….you’ll think you have a whole different body….from another planet.

  518. 523
    lepetitfromage

    OMG Paige. Thank you so much for mentioning tonsil stones! Those things are horrifying. I’ve actually had days where I can SMELL THEM BEFORE THEY COME OUT. When that happens I seriously want nothing more than to gargle cleaning products.

    Also, to all of us my previous OCD “suffering” posters above me- thank you. Thank you so much for opening up about your body weirdness because I am so fascinated by mine that I want to talk about it ALL THE TIME but it really does make me sound insane so I keep it bottled up. Except around my fiance. He knows quite a bit of the weirdness- not all, but a lot. :-P

    Weird “me” things-

    I constantly have to pick at my ingrown toenails. It is disgusting and I have aspirations of one day having beautiful fancy manicured toenails but they are just angry little fuckers that don’t care about my hopes and dreams. And I have 2 little spots on my stomach- perfectly in line with one another but about 4 inches apart. And one hair was growing out of each of them. I think I damaged one of them enough that the hair stopped growing but the other one is a beast. Once a month I yank it out (and then look at it for like 5 minutes because OMG HAIR. I can’t pluck or pull a hair without looking at the root for a while). Zits are NOT safe, ever. Neither are my cuticles. I spend so much time trying to make them perfect that they end up looking all ragged. I also feel around my scalp every once in a while and sometimes I get “lucky” and find a small bump- not quite a zit (or at least I don’t think so)- maybe an ingrown hair. Then I scratch at it like mad and then for the next week or so, I have these little crusties that are tormenting me and I have to get them off my head. But I almost kinda like them too. It’s complicated. Sometimes if I scratch the inside of my ear (the conch i think?) I’ll end up with a scab and again- become obsessed with it until it’s gone. Which inevitably takes forever because I can’t help but pick it and marvel at the size of the scab that was in my tiny ear. Ok, my ears aren’t that tiny. But they’re weird too, actually. They stick out. Used to be my biggest problem, but now I hardly think about them! ……probably because I’m so preoccupied with everything else lol

  519. Had one on my right cheek. Twice. So yes, it does grow back and mine is worse because at least with yours, you could be a unicorn. With mine…uh, I’m just a lady with a long, 3 1/2 inch white hair on my cheek.

    denise recently posted Wool Blanket, Snow and Letting Go.

  520. I have one that periodically sprouts from one of my earlobes. The first time it happened (because it was NOT THERE the day before), I was putting my hair up in a pony tail and my ear kept folding up when I tried to gather my hair. I couldn’t figure it out – why my ear was trying to get in the ponytail. Then I saw that hair and asked WHERE THE HELL DID THAT COME FROM???? I pulled it out and after a couple of months it was back. I don’t worry about it anymore, but the first time really freaked me out.

    Sayre recently posted When Life Gives You Lemons....

  521. If this makes you feel any better, I have a white birthmark in my armpit that makes all the hairs in that armpit albino. Apparently it’s something called piebaldism. And it’s rare in humans but much more common in horses, rats, snakes, pigeons, and domesticated ANIMALS in general. So now whenever I see a spotted pigeon, I refer to him/her as my piebald brethren.

  522. I have multiple spontaneous hairs that pop up. Usually on my forehead and the tip of my nose, and very rarely from my chest. The nose ones are the best. They appear out of nowhere and sometimes in the middle of the day. I’ll be talking to a colleague and notice movement about 1-2 inches from my face. Upon further inspection I find it’s a thin white hair wafting like a whisker from my nose.

  523. I’m just excited that I might sort of but not really know a unicorn.

    Em recently posted Love!.

  524. I had that happen once…not the white hair thing, that shit happens ALL the time to me and I love to obsess over them after they’ve been plucked properly. I blame my children for that. No, this was a mole one my face- it’s flesh colored so it doesn’t really stand out and I’ve had it my whole life- one day I saw like a two inch brown hair growing out of it. WTF?!!?!??!?!!?!? I pulled it and played with it for a good five minutes pondering how in the hell that had happened and why none of my beloved family members (who claimed to have not noticed…liars) didn’t tell me about it. Now I obsessively make sure that I catch the hair in its infancy before I look like some old witch walking around Target scaring small children.

    Suburbian Siren recently posted As it turns out....

  525. I have a whole in my cheek caused by a teenage obsession with lighters.
    I was lighting it just to light it so it got hot.The phone rang so I picked up the phone and rested my head on my hand holding the lighter “HellooOOH SONOFABITCHOOOOW” is what my grandma heard on the other end. The lighter burned me right on a mole on my cheek that Inverted as it scared so I have a permanent pin prick size whole in my cheek.

    If that doesn’t help you feel better I can share that I am under 25 and missing most of my teeth.
    That’s sexy right there.

  526. I have a weird bump in the middle of my forehead. It just appeared one day when I was in college. I tell people it’s because I’m part unicorn.

    I think there’s a secret unicorn genetics program going on…

  527. Dude, that happened to me once! Only I didn’t catch it until it was so long it was clear down to my chin. It kept tickling my face and I couldn’t find it because mine was completely clear. My sister saw it one day when I was side-lit and it was glistening in the sun. She pulled it out and I bled for ages.

  528. I have one of those only it grows out of my wrist. So basically I’m a special needs unicorn.

    Melizzard recently posted Happy Valentines Internet – Don’t let this kill you.

  529. Oh yeah, and my pinky toe nails grow straight up instead of out like the rest of my nails. I mentioned this to my mom in passing one day when I noticed my baby nephews did the same thing and she said that everyone in the family has those toes. Only took me 38 years to learn that one.

  530. I grow a beard…A lot.

    I grow a beard better than most men.

    Lori recently posted Anti Bullshit Powder.

  531. Wow – there are at least 3 people on here who seem to have what I have – those awesome/weird preauricular ear pit things. No one ever knew what they were, certainly not my doctors. I learned about them from a newspaper article about random medical conditions no one’s ever heard of. So that was handy. I’ve never met another person who has them. Mine look like piercings without jewelry in them, which occasionally confuses people.

  532. My first time commenting! LOVED the book! I think I first heard about the blog on My Talk 107.1 out of Mpls. (shout out).

    I had a hair like that growing out of my lower back. My boyfriend at the time noticed it while we were catching some rays on a beach in Spain. I thought I looked good in my bikini…apparently the long hair was too much of a distraction because he let me know it was there!

  533. Chin hairs. That migrate. I’ll get clothesline chinhairs that WERE NOT THERE YESTERDAY but are now somehow 5 feet long, and in the middle of my cheek.

    Related: I’m single, boys!

  534. Oh, yeah. I have one that springs, full-panoplied from the head of Zeus-like, out of my left bicep area. But only about once every 2-3 years, and only, ONLY in summer, when biceps are out for all the world to see.

  535. To all the extra nipple people — I’ve read that Anne Boleyn had that too, so maybe you’re royal. But don’t lose your head with excitement over it….

  536. Just recently discovered (thanks Internet!) that the gross-smelling blobs that come out of my tonsils are tonsil stones, and I’m not the only weird-ass person on the face of the earth to have them. Google them. They’re delightful.

  537. I get that suddenly-there-mega-long-hair from the side of my face. I kinda wish it came from my forehead, now.

  538. 543
    Suzanne Roupas

    Jenny, breathe dear one. I was at the hairdressers about 4 years ago and she started to laugh. Not giggle but full out belly laugh. I had a 3 inch white hair growing out of my ear!!!

    So, apparently fast growing white hairs on one’s face are not that all unusual and in fact you are now in the FGWHOOF’s club.

    As a depressing aside, I just wanted to tell you that as you age, Mother Nature makes sure that the hair from your lady bits travels upward to your chin. This leaves your lady bits, er, chilly and your chin astoundingly hairy. Just sayin’ so you have something to look forward to.

  539. I’m… weirdly jealous. I want a unicorn horn….

    Emelie recently posted One of the Coolest Love Stories Ever and Why I’m a Terrible Gift Giver..

  540. Well last year my boyfriend was trying to helpfully get a piece of fuzz off of my face when all of a sudden my cheek started to sting like hell. Ended up that piece of fuzz was attached to my face and he took the liberty to pull it out for me. Now I get it back about four times a year and I never know when it’s going to happen. Hopefully my boyfriend will continue to be as helpful in the future. Otherwise I might be stuck walking around with an errant hair on my cheek. And THAT would be embarrassing.

    Good news….my boyfriend didn’t leave me. He does still laugh about it thought. Almost daily.

  541. I’ve fatty cysts and some are so big they are lumpy. I also have skin tags that get wrapped up in my armpit hair and hurts like hell.

  542. Oh,Huney, puh-leez. I’ve got chin hairs, neck hairs, boob hairs, belly hairs, butt hairs, you name it. The wonders of polycystic ovary syndrome.

  543. So, I’m a redhead, therefore my hair “down there” is red. Though I have one freaky BLACK hair in that bunch. WTF?!

  544. > We’re not weird, we’re MAGICAL.

    YOU NEED THIS ON A FUCKING T-SHIRT.

  545. 2″ white hair growing out of the middle of my (face) cheek. Impossible that it had been there the day before.. it was too obvious to have been missed

    Ludovicaa recently posted Extract from this year’s Nanowrimo.

  546. I’ve never had one out of my forehead, but every once in a while I get like a 2 inch hair that grows out under my chin. Not like a chin hair, it’s further back. Like that soft spot that leaves the underside of your tongue defenseless. Like you, every night when I wash my face I examine it. To make sure I’m not embarrassing myself too badly. Most of the time, under my chin is smooth and hair free, but every once in a while this 2 inch hair comes out of nowhere and I pray that no one noticed it before I did!

  547. 552
    enigmacunundrum

    i have in inch long BLACK body hair that grows in the center of my sternum and is noticeably longer than any other hair near it. so, my theory is that it is a rogue pubic hair that will not be contained in the designated vaginal area and wanted to see what the mountainous peaks (well, slightly hilly area, actually) above is all about. that hair liked the new terrain and stayed. every so often, when the length is right, i rip that bad boy out and remind him that staying is a privilege and not a right. and he grows back with a vengeance.

  548. Oh man, Lady MacBeth I have totally been there. Not the invisible blood on the hands, but the serious adult acne. It only goes away if I’m on the pill (I went off for a few months to try another method & BAM so I’m back on). When I was working with the public, I had people hand me notes, try to convince me to look at a website with them….all kinds of awesome stuff to draw attention to just how horrible it really was.

    As for embarrassing things, though…I’m in the extra nipple club. Mine was close enough to my breast to start stealing tissue and trying to strike out on its own as a very proud third breast. So I have one smaller breast and a scar where the lil’-breast-that-wasn’t-allowed-to made its last stand. Worst surgery to have to lie about when one is 16. “Um, it’s a cyst.”

    Oh, and I had a semi-perforate hymen, which NO OB-GYN BOTHERED TO TELL ME ABOUT UNTIL AFTER I ATTEMPTED TO LOSE MY VIRGINITY AFTER I WAS MARRIED AND NOTHING WOULD GO IN (even tiny tampons). There were some side-comments during previous appointments about “bank vault” and “child-sized” but nobody came straight out and said “there’s a surgery for this, honey, would you like it?” I got my sister the surgery pre-emptively.

    Fortunately, my husband thinks that hunting for tweezable hairs is a game.

  549. I have keloid scars that grow spontaneously on my chest. They start out looking like a pimple that never goes away, and over time they become bigger and bigger. They are red and itchy and if two of them merge you get a continuously filling, bursting, and draining pocket of infection which is unpleasant (painful and smells and looks horrible). Mine is current about 3-4″ long and about 1″ high, and it will probably continue to grow for the rest of my life. There’s no cure, although there are theoretical treatments, none of which I can do because of my other illnesses.

    The next time you look at the top of your cleavage in your sexiest cleavage-producing outfit, imagine a big ugly red scar right in the middle, drawing everyone’s attention (who SHOULD be looking at your rack) to the scar and wondering, “What the hell is THAT?” Now imagine using your unicorn powers to suddenly make it disappear. Poof! Now you have perfect cleavage. You’re welcome.

    Sharon Wachsler recently posted Reading of "River of Beauty" with Fabulous Art! [NSFW Video].

  550. I have ear lobe hair that appears overnight. But it is not gray so I consider that a small victory.

  551. I have a weird place on my right wrist and one at my waistline that has a little circle and each will grow a really long dark hair really quickly. Looks like there are lots of tonsil stones above too. Got them, they make for some really nice morning breath. Plus multiple birthmarks, which makes me happy for the times and place I live in, cause I’d be burned as a witch elsewhere. For reasons more than multiple birthmarks, sure, but that might just push the tribunal over the edge.

  552. It comes to us all my dear, I worked in nursing homes and most ladies had beards, I had to shave them once a week, one time the electric shaver backfired and spat all the white bristles into my mouth!

  553. I have an arm version of this. Also, there are like 3 hairs…they’re similar to eyebrows…that grow out of my chin. My best friend has a black one that grows on her neck (she’s blonde). In addition, I have giant grandpa unibrow, and the older I get, the more asymmetrical my body gets.

  554. I got surgery in my left boob and arm. It took four hours longer than expected. When I woke up the doctor was so excited because he had found a mysterious muscle, I quote, “that people lost with evolution, so now you only can see it in cows. Well, cows and you”.
    I asked if I was a mutant and he said “I have taken a million pictures and I’m going to show them in an international conference, aren’t you thrilled?”.

  555. The fact that there are about 300 people here saying “I thought I was the only one!” perfectly illustrates why the world needs you, Jenny.

    On a side note, in addition to my weird leaking navel, I also get overnight ninja hairs on the side of my throat. I’ve gotten them since puberty – goodness knows what will happen when I hit menopause. I may just spontaneously turn into a satyr.

  556. HOLY SHIT!
    1. I also get the random long hair growing out of my forehead!! I’ve always been terrified that it slowly grows and everyone wonders why I don’t use a mirror.
    2. I think the cause must be all the Lisa Frank stickers I wore as a child.
    3. I’m so excited to become a unicorn someday.

  557. I have one of those that shows up on my cheek. Of course the hubby-person notices it before I do when it mysteriously shows itself and will poke it until I threaten to bite him.

    Brooke recently posted So Then….

  558. I’m post-menopausal. This happens on my chin. It makes me NUTS.

  559. Also, I have one clear eyebrow hair that is thick as fuck. I now call it my Quill. It grows in the same spot and will take a while to brew, sometimes being ever-so-kind to form itself into a lovely zit. But once it’s tweezable, I grab that fucker and work it out–I can “feel/hear” it separating from its little nook in my face–and it’s a long, thick, bamboo-stalk-like fucking quill.

    What. The. Fuck.

  560. for as long as i can remember, i’ve had a patch of hair (that gets fairly long if i let it) that grows right where my neck meets my head. and it’s not even blonde! it used to be, but then it turned light brownish red. WTF?! it’s like my body wanted a neck beard, but could only convince one spot to grow it.

  561. 1) Thanks to PCOS, I can grow a beards hat would make an Appalachian banjo player jealous.
    2) Once when I was doing some ladyscaping, I notice an ingrown hair bump and extracted a foot-long coiled up hair.
    3) I have Exploding Head Syndrome. Really.

  562. My stretch marks are so bad, so much loose skin that if I bend at the waist and suck in my belly button – my abdomen looks like that painting “The Scream”. Don’t ask me how I discovered this butI will never show a living soul

  563. * beard that (I’m more ashamed of not proofing that post than I am of admitting my physical abnormalities in a public forum)

  564. wow… a lot of people have weird hair issues! I now feel kinda left out…

    Debby recently posted To say that all goes exactly as planned, would be an overstatement….

  565. We all have that one odd hair that we hate lol. I have this crazy hair that grows on my chin, just one, but it’s super thick so I pluck it like everyday, and everyday I wake up and it’s there!

  566. My dad has rogue eye brows which I really hope are not genetic! And it’s not that his eye brows are super bushy its that every now and then one will grow freakishly long and I have to politely ask him to fix it cause its weird…

    I also have very hairy feet and have to shave them… how sexy is that??!?!?

    Maybe the feet hair is why I am still singe….

    Annette recently posted Body complexes and other life depressions.

  567. My rogue overnight appearing 3 inch long thin blonde/clear hair is on the right side of my nose. I can feel a weird tingly/itching sensation the day before it decides to appear. I guess since mine’s coming out of my nose, I’m a narwhal?

  568. Oh Jenny, just wait until you are past 50! Then there will be so many of these weird things happening, it won’t even seem weird anymore. Here is what is weird, I keep imagining the hair screaming knock knock motherfucker before it popped out. I guess you were sleeping and didn’t hear that :-)

  569. 574
    Karen (aka @madabip)

    Once every month or so I get a black AND a white hair growing out of my front TOOTH. They have to grow somewhere, I guess. But since I only have one tooth, you’d think the creator of the universe could’ve cut me some slack.

  570. I didn’t know they actually appeared over night, I just thought the one coming out of my forhead just got long enough to poke me in the eye. I kept brushing it out of my face till I got fed yup and tried to pull it all back into a pony tail only to realized it wasn’t IN my hairline. It comes back now and then and I just yank it.

  571. I, unfortunately, have you all beat.

    Here’s some weirdness that should make you feel better, Jenny: a HUMONGOUS skin tag that grows and grows and won’t stop f*cking growing….just above the left labia, so, if I were to stand in front of someone naked, said someone could DEFINITELY and easily *see* the grossness. Which is one reason I don’t generally stand in front of anyone naked.

    I’m talking brown, spongy, pancake-y thing the size of a nickle now. Started as just a small rough patch. Grew out kinda pencil eraser and then penis-shaped before having it removed once. That was bad enough. Then it came back with a VENGEANCE. So big it gets caught up in my underwear sometimes and hurts — have to “reposition” this freaky appendage to ease the pain.

    Feel better? You’re welcome.

  572. God, we are all so fucked up.

    I once had a bump on the back of my thigh. Started looking at it and it was a slightly raised light brown spot. I thought it was a mole at first, but something told me to poke at a bit. I squeezed it and it ended up being a GIANT blackhead caused by an ingrown hair.

    Now I’m a bit obsessive about checking for ingrown hairs on my legs so this doesn’t happen again.

    Courtney recently posted Public service announcement.

  573. Like two years ago, I was having shooting pains in my left arm pit. Then one day when I was dancing naked in front of the mirror, and I noticed a giant lump in that armpit. And when I told people they’re like, “Oh you must have an enlarged lymph node.” But I knew lymph nodes were not giant squishy lumps that felt like they were filled with fluid. And the doctor totally confirmed it wasn’t a lymph node but thought maybe I had some horrible infection so gave me a bunch of antibiotics, but the lump never went away. I STILL HAVE IT but NOBODY CARES ANYMORE. Except when I’m in a swimsuit and people are like, “Oh, so you gain all your weight in your left armpit,” and I’m like “It’s WATER weight. Totally different.” But it’s not even that. It’s way less noticeable now but it still hurts when I start getting sick but not to the touch, it’s like my own personal alarm that I will be ill. And people are STILL like, “That’s a tender swollen lymph node.” And I’m like “NO! Touch it. You’ll see.” But nobody wants to ever touch my armpit.

  574. By the time I had 3 white hairs on my head, almost all of nose hair had already turned white. (I don’t have, like, a mane growing out of there. But, as you said, I’m a girl – with a magnifying mirror – so I notice these things.) It just seems strange to me that my nose hair would be sooo far ahead of the rest of me.

  575. I have a dark brown/black, coarse hair that grows in the middle of my chest. For the record I’m female. And I’m hot. But the weird chest hair is not hot, not at all. So I pluck that little bitch as soon as I can get my tweezers to grip it!

    Runner Courtney recently posted Peanut Butter Girl Scout Cookie.

  576. Something wierd about my body… I have a chocolate thumb. Well, that’s what I thought when I was a kid, one vanilla and one chocolate. Sadly it was only the color, not the taste, though I always sucked on the chocolate one if I was going to suck a thumb, you never know, it could change, right? Of course that’s when my father found a short story about a girl with a toffee flavored thumb and she sucked on it until it was gone… Childhood trauma caused by a birthmark. Fabu.

    On the plus side, I have an excuse for being a plant-killer. I have a brown thumb!

  577. My limp unicorn horn grows from the center of my chest between my boobs. I pluck it so regularly, even my husband doesn’t know about it. But now that I’ve told the internet, I guess I’ll have to ‘fess up to him.

    In other news, I’ve had a blood-and-pus-seeping infection at the base of both big toenails for the last three months. Even my doctor can’t say why — or why it’s in both big toes, not one, and not in any of the other toes. #whatisthatidonteven

    *sigh*

    Courtney Cantrell recently posted 5 Things They Don’t Tell You About Being a New Momma.

  578. I want to be a part of the conversation, but everyone else’s answers were so good. So, I will just say that I had thyroid cancer and a thyroidectomy, and now I take thyroid hormone in a pill and it’s just weird. I feel bionic and I wonder if I am still me if I am from a pill bottle now. Will I know if I am not acting like myself? Bodies are weird.

    Meg Griswold recently posted Words words words.

  579. you are not alone:

    “…One time, I had a very weird thing happening. I had one hair growing through the middle of my forehead! It was very thin, I think it grew in two days, like, three inches long. It was horrifying! I was like, ‘What is this? A hair growing on my face!’”

    http://intothegloss.com/2011/12/olivier-theyskens/?guide=profiles&guidenum=14

  580. you are not alone:

    “…One time, I had a very weird thing happening. I had one hair growing through the middle of my forehead! It was very thin, I think it grew in two days, like, three inches long. It was horrifying! I was like, ‘What is this? A hair growing on my face!’”

    http://intothegloss.com/2011/12/olivier-theyskens/?guide=profiles&guidenum=14

  581. I’ve decided I’m not going to sweat it until I find that first gray hair below the waist.

  582. I feel ya…only mine sprouts from my neck….right in the middle. Definitely does not have the same allure as turning into a unicorn does.

  583. I have to watch out or the goat beard that I got from my great grandma will grow out of control and take over my whole face. Stupid fucking goat beard.

    NATurally Inappropriate recently posted I’m a real fucking keeper, ya’ll.

  584. Hey, congrats on turning into a unicorn!!

    Kathleen recently posted Heart of Flowers.

  585. I can pop my sternum. It is actually kind of an awesome weirdness.

  586. I ran across this from a feature on cracked.com, but I think you should see Orville the helicopter cat:
    http://articles.latimes.com/2012/jun/05/business/la-fi-tn-stuffed-coptercat-sparks-global-outrage-20120605

  587. I have freakishly long toes. You know those weird medical shows where they use someone’s big toe to replace a chopped off thumb? I’m pretty sure if I chopped off any fingers, they could be easily replaced by any of my toes and only look moderately weird. My brother-in-law makes fun of my toes all the time. He also makes fun of me for the one time I was riding in the car with him and the car ahead of us drove through a puddle, shooting water straight at our windshield and I… raisedupmyarmstoshieldmyfacefromtheoncomingwater… That’s not really relevant, but since when have we cared about that.

  588. When twitter confuses you, you can no longer claim less hair than Gandalf.

  589. Am I the only one here who lives alone and is totally freaking out right now about what evil hairs may be growing in places on my back I can’t see?

  590. Maybe it’s the beginning phase of mutating into a superhero (or a unicorn indeed)! In any case, be glad there wasn’t a giant mole attached (how would you feel if that grew out of your forehead over night?)!

    Sabrina recently posted WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!!!.

  591. Yeah, at 52, I have to mow inside my nose because of the horrendous black hairs. I don’t get it. I pretty much haven’t had to shave my legs for 20+ years & amuse myself when we’re sitting around talking about this sort of thing. Ladies complain about leg hair, I show them my calf, they might touch it & I say, yeah..I don’t have to shave. They hate on me. I giggle.
    And no cat whiskers, but I remember horrifying a friend by yanking on what I thought was a cat hair on her face-and, well, it was attached.
    I do have that one horrifying black chin hair I have to keep an eye on

  592. I have an inch long hair that magically appears overnight…growing out of my right boob. I think I won this game.

  593. HOLY FUCKING SHIT! To spontaneously sprout a horn would be the ultimate right of passage here in New Braunfels where the Unicorn is our school mascot. Talk about freaking out your opponents. Imagine that bad boy protruding from a football helmet. So. Fucking. Awesome

  594. Several of the random hairs comments cover mine too, so thanks for that everyone! I’d just like to say to whoever mentioned ice cream headaches, mine hurt in the middle of my chest. I guess that makes them more like ice cream heart attacks.
    And my boyfriend has a double row of eyelashes, like a shark has multiple rows of teeth.

    I love you people.

    Jordan recently posted SOTD - 01.24.13.

  595. Nara-I’ve been getting that ice cream headache in the back between the shoulder blades thing too-but just recently! I never thought a fruit smoothie could be so agonizing!

  596. My dad has that. His bald spot is also in the shape of a heart. It can’t be a coincidence!

  597. When the mole on my forehead grew a skin tag, I had to do something rash.

    Burns the Fire recently posted One Billion Rise.

  598. It could be worse – it could have been a really long white pubic hair…

  599. I too am weirdly jealous… my weird thing is that every once in a while my belly button smells really really bad…I don’t understand it, it’s not like I do anything differently on the days that it doesn’t smell at all and the days it smells, but it’s really disconcerting… especially when you can smell it on your shirt, and you’re all like “shit what’s that smell?” and then you’re like “crap I hope other people aren’t smelling the weird ass smell coming out of my belly button…”

  600. Thank you tonsil stone poster! I get those whenever I get sick, and had no idea WTF they were or that it happened to anyone else but me! They irritate me so much, I knock them out with a toothbrush or my finger, and try not to puke while doing it. Besides that, I’ve had something that looks like a weird ingrown pimple on my upper thigh for over 20 years.

  601. Every once in a while I find one very long white eye lash. It wasn’t there the day before, so something crazy definitely happened overnight. It’s so long I can wrap it around my fingers a couple times to easily yank it out. Maybe next time I’ll tie it into a lasso to fetch my glasses from the bedside table without having to roll over. Or maybe to open the door to let the cat out. (The bedroom door, not the door to the house, just to be clear.)

    Alison recently posted A Beet Broccoli Cottage Cheese Orange Juice and Strawberry Smoothie.

  602. My pubic hair has started to turn white. I’m 31.

  603. Oh my. I thought I was the only limp unicorn. There are more of us! Seriously. For about a year I’d have that every other month or so. One time, there were 3 of those hairs coming from the same follicle. I thought I was turning into a rhinoceros. You are not alone! And now, I look for them. I have not had a rhino/unicorn event in about 3 years. I blame the overabundance of soy in my diet at the time.

  604. A 1″ long brown breast hair shows up from time for no reason, and yes it will be the day after I’ve just looked at my breast. Nothing there the day before. All of the sudden I’m Tom Selleck. Not even unicorn worthy, pathetic. Maybe I’ve been working in male dominated industries for long enough that I’m turning into one.

  605. Got one, too, middle of my cheek and it grows STRAIGHT OUT so it sticks away from my face. When I was a teen, I could only tell that it had reappeared again because my mom would get a really weird look on her face right before she yanked it out. (Now I know it was the “my daughter’s turning into a unicorn right before my eyes” look.) When I went to college, I worried how I would ever find it, since my mom would not be there to give me that look.

    And my eyebrows are turning grey (I prefer to call it “a lighter shade of blonde”).

  606. I have a nasty hair that grows out of a mole on my cheek. It makes me sad!

    Shamelessly Sassy recently posted Buy, Sell, Trade? No, Thanks..

  607. I have a white hair that grows out of the side of the bridge of my nose. Overnight. I thought I was the only one! I also have hairs that grow out of a mole on my face (yuck) and granny-billy-goat hairs on my chin. Sigh.

  608. I have a 3″ overnight grow white hair too, but mine’s an actual whisker. It grows out of my cheek exactly where my face begins the slope into the middle of my nose. It’s about 20 times more coarse than any other hair on my body, and has a pointy end. My husband insists it’s because I was a cat in my other life. To the best of my knowledge, I have sufficient intellect and depth perception to keep myself getting stuck in an opening my body can’t fit through, so I cannot imagine why my body feels the need to decorate me with cat whiskers.

  609. I was JUST having this conversation the other night. Damn BRANCH growing out of my eyebrow! You’d think anyone who had a conversation with me in the last week would have noticed. Hopefully they were too busy staring at my boobs.

  610. I have yet to finish probing the depths of my belly button.

    Seriously. It’s an abyss.

    Rebecka recently posted The Case Against The SAT.

  611. Part of my frontal skull had formed a bony protuberance. I noticed it about ten years ago and it is getting slightly larger. Being covered with skin and muscle,and covered with bangs, it is not usually noticed unless someone brushes my hair back in a loving type gesture. ……Then Lover invariably freaks a little. I am digging this unicorn theory though! I could whisper in a sultry tone….” Forget catching a leprechaun, you have a much more exotic and valuable unicorn in your arms!”

  612. I woke up one day with weird, dark pieces of skin all over my legs. Went to the doctor to make sure it wasn’t some kind of aggressive, acute skin disease. The verdict? Early-onset keratosis (aka skin tags) at the age of 31. Doc said “this usually only happens in old people…I guess you’re just special.”

    Thanks a lot, Doc.

  613. I can’t bend my thumb without my pointer finger bending as well. They are weirdly connected.

  614. Did you ever think it might not be your hair? I work in a vet office and we frequently get animal hair stuck in our skin. It needs to be plucked and sticks just like a real hair that grew from you would. Blame your kitty!

  615. Well that explains a lot. I’m a unicorn too. But my weird white hair is a little right of center. I hope when the full horn grows in it sorta straightens out. Nobody’s going to take me seriously with my horn slightly to the right. Also, last week one of my students drew me a unicorn picture with neon crayons. It’s like she knew.

  616. Oh, and I used to work with a guy who had a giant, long unicorn skin-tag right in the middle of his forehead. It looked like a black, thick, slightly-droopy horn. He was allowed to wear a hat whenever he wanted so that he could cover it up. Most of the time, he did.

  617. Those pesky grays! And you can’t laser away gray hair (yet) – which is like a double whammy. Gray hairs poking out of chins, foreheads, pubes. None of them are hot. But only one is unicorn-ish. Not only should you feel special, but also like an overachiever, based on it’s rapid growth. Did you write on the message board?

    A Morning Grouch recently posted An Open Valentine to Mr. Grouch.

  618. I had that…only it was poking out of my left cheek. Also found a black one poking out of my right boob. Which really weird because I’m a redhead.

    Nikki Mohamed recently posted Apples and Their Distance From Trees.

  619. Apparently everyone has errant hairs!
    I found one several years ago coming out of my lower back, thought it was a hair from my head, it was so long it wrapped around my hand several times, so must have been 15 inches or more. It has come back since but has never grown that long again. It was very fine, nothing like those obnoxious chin hairs that sprout randomly like the little bitches they are.

  620. I do also want to comment that in college our upstairs neighbor came down with her boyfriend so they could report that they had found a pubic hair on him that was curled up tight and stretched out to a number of feet. He was pretty proud.

  621. I have a white hair that grows out of the very tip of my nose about every 2 years and it comes outta no where! I wake up and *BAM!* there it is. I have to have my boyfriend tweeze it because I have to go so cross-eyed to get at it. You’re brave for blasting this!

  622. I will assume you are turning into a unicorn. Congratulations! All of the annoying ordinary things happen to me… nothing so exceptional!

  623. A month ago I noticed in the mirror at work that there was an inch-long brown hair growing out of the center of MY forehead, and who knows how long I’d been walking around with that fucker. I’m going to have to develop OCD just to stay on top of this shit now.

    downfromtheledge recently posted Pain, hope, and the co-existence of the two.

  624. My boyfriend has strawberry blonde hair, and I once found a black hair on his head. I pulled it out and he freaked out, not understanding why this was happening to him.

    Robyn Webb recently posted My Boyfriend is a Party Pooper. He Won't Buy Me 1500 Ladybuys.

  625. In the last 2 monthsI have had zits in the following places:
    -the middle of my back
    -my left leg
    -on the top of my head
    -on my right boob
    -on my wrist

  626. I have that long, white(almost clear) single hair once a year just under my chin. One time I found it on my rib cage area. I haven’t seen it again since that one time… actually i’m going to go check my whole body now.

    KatPerez recently posted Twitter has ruined me!.

  627. OK…I thought it was cool to be a unicorn. But oh well. Now I’m slightly spooked by all these people who have the same single white hair growing somewhere on their face!! I feel like I’m the weird one now, because I have a random BLACK hair on my wrist (not so weird except that my hair is a light brown/dirty blonde, so a single black hair right on my wrist bone is…unexpected.)

    Klementine recently posted Optimism is hard but I think (and hope) it’s worth it..

  628. I have two extra tiny nipples that doctors call accessory mammary. I never thought much about them, as I have had them my whole life. But, over the years, I have had a couple doctors point them out, and it is a little disconcerting at how excited the doctors were to see them!
    In addition, I had a dermoid ovarian cyst that was removed and contained hair and teeth. Nasty I know, but very common-really, google it.
    I like to tell my children that I am a “freak of nature”.

  629. I get one too. I just thought it was a Unicorn Success Club membership perk.

  630. Does anyone remember when Rosie O’Donnell had that talk show. And then there was the time she embraced her chin/neck hair by letting it grow out and putting a bead on it? Good times. I’ve got 2 chin hairs… One black, one white. They also appear over night. Jersey.

  631. You’ve gotten so many comments on this entry that you might never get to this one, but I’ll throw it out there anyway, as embarrassing as it might be. First, any chance the hair came from elsewhere and got embedded in a pore? That happens. Of course, if it comes back, my theory is blown. But if it doesn’t, look very suspiciously at those around you who have white hair. Dog? Cat? Mother?

    Now for my personal experience. We once had a Bouvier de Flandres dog, which, being a miserly DIYer, I was crazy enough to groom. One day a few hours after I’d finished, I felt a sharp pain in my left boob. Upon examination, I learned that a lot of black doggie hairs had squiggled into my bra and that one of the hairs had embedded itself–to the tune of about an inch–into the opening of MY NIPPLE! Upon checking the right boob, I discovered that another hair was making the same attempt. From then on, I stuffed tissues in my bra to prevent a re-occurrence. And now we use a groomer. Wisdom does come with age.

  632. I get those white hairs every now and then on my right cheek. The worst was when my husband and I were out with friends one night, and he reached up to brush something he saw off of my cheek. Except that it wasn’t a smudge or a crumb. It was one of those hairs, that had grown between the time we left the house and finished dinner out. He ended up pulling the hair out, and when I said, “Ouch!” he apologized and then explained to EVERYBODY that he’d pulled a long hair out of my cheek.
    Also, I have holes in my tonsils that collect bits of food and then periodically expel them so that I get to know what two-week old Doritos taste like. That’s always pleasant.

  633. And by “Jersey” I clearly meant JERKS. Why must my phone be such a jersey. :P

  634. I have a freckle on my finger in a weird spot, and every time I eat chocolate I get confused and try to eat my freckle.

    Evalynn Rose recently posted Grocery shopping Mr. Ev style.

  635. If I don’t pluck my eyebrows for two days, I get a unibrow. No joke.

  636. Thank you to all you brave “commenters” who have made me feel so much better about my ordinary, average and very normal body issues. Reading about your hairs, your tonsil stones, your thumbs, shaggy feet etc. made me laugh, cry and freak out a little. But at the end of all the posts, I really feel quite attractive! My kids are wondering what I am reading (and laughing about) but I don’t want to scar them or cause obsessive behaviors. I have to say though, that it is quite odd that in my 47 years I have never heard anyone talk about most of these issues and here Jenny has all of you as readers. It’s like group therapy! Now if I ever grow a wiry, long, white hair I won’t feel bad or alone. Thanks again!

  637. At least you don’t have a BLACK hair growing out of a mole on your cheek. I am mortified.

    Amanda R. recently posted I Took the Boys to an Amazing Theater and They Made Me Feel Really Old.

  638. My brother gets that same white hair on his forehead which I would always pull out when we were kids. I don’t think he’d like to be a unicorn though so I hope he gets rid of it himself these days. Also my mom and I both get two or three thick black hairs on our chests and chins, always randomly. I’d take a unicorn hair over those any day.

  639. I have hairy, hobbit toes. And even though it’s too blonde to see, I have a moustache and kitten-forehead-whiskers.

    And I have definitely sneezed and peed before.

  640. I have a fast-growing unicorn hair growing out of the back of my right knee. Ok, I guess it’s not going to shape itself into a unicorn horn, unless unicorns start sprouting knee horns. I discovered it for the first time when I was in a pretty dress at a wedding, and a lady tried to help me by “fixing my loose string” and yanked at what SHE thought was a loose string, but what TURNED OUT TO BE a freakishly long hair that either A. Sprang up overnight, or B. Somehow missed 14 years of shaving. AWK-WARD. I am now paranoid about checking the backs of my knees for freak hairs.

  641. I am curious about the stated length of the hair. Did you measure the hair or did your husband tell you it was three inches. Just saying…..

  642. I was performing a mammogram on a lady, and was trying to remove a piece of her hair that fell onto her boob….It was a boob hair….I PLUCKED a complete strangers boob hair. I also have little hairs growing out of my chin area, and an ex boyfriend pointed out I have a beard (I have like 7 hairs DOUCHE BAG), but it will never be as embarrassing as plucking another woman’s boob hair. NOPE, that’s a winner.

  643. I’ve had one of those white hair bastards, but on the side of my cheek, when I was 18.
    I also sweat when I get cold, have a mole on my eyelid and right palm, and the area from my ankles to about three inches up my leg spontaneously stopped growing hair a few years ago.

    My cousin had surgery on what they thought was a tumor. It was an ingrown hair. That was the size of a golf ball. On his face.

    My best friend (male) has weird ass facial follicles. Sometimes 10 or more hairs will be growing from a single follicle! It looks like plastic bristles, and is vaguely terrifying.

  644. The toenails on my big toes stop growing during the winter (at least the last two winters)…not dead, just stop growing. They do grow during the other seasons.

    Mishka recently posted Maru Fix.

  645. Every time my forehead was itchy today I panicked that I was growing a unicorn hair. There are just so many things to worry about apparently.

    TriGirl recently posted Happy Valentine's Day!.

  646. for a little while, in-utero, i was twins, but i absorbed the twin while still forming. i was born with 4 ears! just the outside parts, one set of internal ear parts. i had two little bean sized things growing on my ears and they were removed days after i was born. i still have a little lump on the right ear and i tend to use this as an ice breaker when forced into social situations…

  647. I have a patch of white eyelashes on my left side. They fall out and grow back in randomly, so sometimes I have a wide white streak of them and sometimes just a sprinkling of white ones throughout my other lashes. But only on the left side. This started when I was 19.

  648. 655
    maryc (@maryclevenger)

    I found two long, blondish-white-ish hairs growing on both sides of my lips. I’m pretty sure that’s a sign that I’ve turned into a Lorax.

  649. Something weird? OK, this one’s on you…my nose hairs have a life of their own. You trim them and the next day? They’re back. And they’re very friendly little guys because they like to wave at people. And they like to peek at to make sure they’re in EVERY picture ever taken of me!
    Friendly, photogenic, reappearing nose hairs.

    Chris Dean recently posted Tales of the Smart and Smart-Assier.

  650. I have a squeaky right eye. I think it’s kind of cool but everyone who’s ever heard it squeak when I rub it, sometimes it’s really loud like you can hear it across a quiet room, thinks it’s creepy and gross. I think it gives me character and they’re just a little jealous that their eyes aren’t so special.

    stacie tamaki recently posted Squee! My trailer is yellow and so cute!.

  651. I have a reoccuring dream where I’m getting ready for a party and I have whiskers coming out of my forehead. I’m proud of them and I darken them with mascara, thinking to myself, “Everyone is going to be soooo jealous of my beautiful whiskers. No one else will have whiskers like me!”When I get to the party, everyone compliments me and tells me how beautiful i look and how lush and lovely my whiskers are.

    I hope that in my next dream, people start complimenting me on becominga unico.

  652. Ah, so you are turning into a fabled and mythical creature to be loved, adored and worshipped by millions, Oh wait …. already there

    So funny

    Tom Stronach recently posted Chicken Breast with Olive and Caper Tapenade.

  653. I don’t have a mysterious instant hair, just the usual annoying ones that grow out of moles, but I do sneeze the first time I eat chocolate every day. Every time. (didn’t want to feel left out of the unicorn-ness) x

  654. Every year my “Beaty mark” to the right of my mouth, which is MUCH too light colored to be sexy, sprouts another hair. Starting in my teens. So, I now have 15+ random hairs to pluck daily because they don’t sprout at once, so I have to keep checking. Every. Fucking. Day.

    I’ve become a connosoier of tweezers.

    Also, I’ve determined they hide under my skin. They curl up and wait, irritating me but out of reach short of self mutilation, and then, when you LEAST expect it, they pop through the surface and are inches long.

    I will now call them my black multicorn horns. Because I’m so magical, I can make 15 horns sprout!!!

  655. The lady who does my pedicures pointed out that I had three large hairs growing out of my foot. Great, I’m turning into a hobbit.

  656. I’m on an insulin pump (diabetic) and dialysis (consequences of being diabetic). One more mechanical replacement part and I’m officialy a cyborg. I hope it’s a Terminator eye that scans for info it can put right into my brain — kind of like a regular eye, but with cool graphics and digial print only I can see.

  657. Long, curly hair (just one) growing out of my cheek. And I’m not a dude. I actually shaved it for a while then finally pulled it out with tweezers. Never came back. Sometimes I look for it…

  658. I was born with a three-inch long black hair growing out of my left shoulder blade. So, Hunchback unicorn?

    Molly Dugger Brennan recently posted Illness, Winter Storms, and Parents.

  659. Chin hairs? Yes. Hairy knuckles on my fingers and toes that I have to shave? Yes. And the left side of my rib cage juts out way farther than my right rib cage but you can only tell when I’m lying down. But my truly annoying freak body thing is that I have developed a weird allergy to bandaids. At first, I thought I might have a latex allergy but then I googled it and realized that it’s probably an allergy to the adhesive. So, after nicking my shin while shaving (the blade was probably dull after dealing with my hairy hands and feet), I put a bandaid on it for about an hour. Then I developed this horrible bumpy, itchy rash so I removed it. This was a month ago and I still have a weird rash in the shape of a bandaid on my leg. Awesome.

    On a side note, I’ve never seen so many responses to a post that was not a giveaway. Clearly we are all freaks and it is quite comforting to me in a misery loves company sort of way that I’m not such a weirdo. Thanks for posting about this Jenny and thanks to everyone else for sharing about your unicorn, hobbit and other fictional character tendencies. I feel better already!

  660. I have a lone white neck hair. And just like many of your commenters, I can only see it on certain days because of the typically grey skies here combined with the sightedness where you can’t see far away or up close.

    My greatest fear is who is going to manage this for me when I get older? I’ll have to hire someone to keep an eye on that plus draw my lipstick in the lines.

    Beck recently posted March for Change -- Post 12/14.

  661. I have had the same experience, but sadly, mine grows about a half-inch below my lower lip. It’s not there for long periods of time, then I wake up and it’s several inches long, and I have no idea how it got there. I refuse to believe that it is a chin hair because that doesn’t happen to awesome people, right? Thank you for offering the unicorn theory, because now I know that I am just a unicorn whose horn has a confused sense of direction.

  662. 669
    Nichole Thornton

    Is it a coincidence that there were exactly 666 comments on this post when I read it?

  663. OMG…I have one of those near my collarbone. It’s come back 3 times over the last 2-ish years. But it doesn’t grow slowly. I’ll check and check and check for it for months, and there will be nothing there. Then all of a sudden, I’ll run my hand over it and it will be over 2″ long! Then I pluck it and begin the cycle anew. I don’t think I want a horn growing near my chest, though…

  664. One of my pubic hairs has always been white. I guess that makes me part pubicorn?

  665. I call those “rogue hairs” like Sarah Palin going rogue not like the x-men character. I get one in the middle of my neck at my voice box. Dafuq?

  666. I have a weird patch of brown skin on my right knee (no, it is not a birthmark) which developed in my early 20s. At first I thought it was just dirt that I failed to wash off in the shower. But no, just random discolored skin. Also, my bestfriend has a blue dot on her arm. BLUE. It looks like a pen mark, except permanent.

    Joanne recently posted Valen-what-day? How we spent this unnecessary (and stupid) holiday.

  667. I have the same hair. Well, not exactly the same because it has my DNA not yours. And it grows just in front of my left ear. So actually not the same hair at all. I have been plucking it out since high school, but it keeps coming back. It’s pure white and thicker than my head hair, and grows at right angles to my head. And seems to appear overnight at length of a few cm’s

  668. Once I pulled a growing seed out of my eye, it had a little root coming off of it and one of my long hairs attached to it… My eye was itchy and I was rubbing it and then felt this thing on my cheek so I went to pick it off my face and it dragged the whole thing out of underneath my eye. I went momentarily blind too and I was driving. Either way Im still sickened and fascinated by the whole experience. If anyone is wondering it was a rye seed, it got in there while I was slicing bread at work.

  669. Y’all make me feel like I’m NOT a complete freak of nature. :)

  670. I used to have a red cross-shaped birthmark in the middle of my forehead. Maybe it was marking the place where my unicorn horn should grow one day.

    Stacey recently posted Ten Mistakes I’ve Made as a Pregnant First Time Mom.

  671. A year ago I was at work and looked down at my blouse and saw a hair laying on it. I tried to flick it off, but it wouldn’t budge. So I grabbed it and … Yes it was attached to my chin. It was three inches long. I really thought it had been there for months and I Was Mortified. But now I realize I am normal. Thank you

  672. I have to comment on a review I can’t reply to directly. Whoever said this girl is making a mockery of mental illness, for lack of a better description: mental illness, in this case panic attacks, are a real hell for those who suffer the true affliction. Jenny is in no way using it for a joke. That’s why this book is 5+ stars. She handles her suffering as best she can and makes jokes. Like many of us suffering. We have been silent all these years in fear you wouldn’t take it as anything but crazy when many of us are loving, funny, lighthearted people. We joke in loss of how to deal with extreme anxiety and are NOT obvious in our struggle. Please, don’t judge this book by the woman strong enough to admit weakness as a judgement on how hilarious she is. She is suffering but has made a great book. One we can relate to, having the affliction. And everyone else who can laugh for Christs sake. Your review made people like me, suffering like
    Jenny, feel that my horror isn’t real unless I kill myself. Shame on you.

  673. My problem are my eyebrows. I check them every morning so I can keep them maintained. But when I get to work, holy crap! there are white eyebrows. How did I miss them? Did they grow in the 15 minute drive to work??? I started keeping tweezers in my purse.

  674. This is hysterical – I’m DYING. :) Also, an 8 year old version of myself is strangely jealous that you might be part unicorn. Just saying.

    Allison recently posted Art: Flowers.

  675. Maybe three will grow next time so you can braid and twist them into a unicorn horn. Then you will be even more awesome.

    Wombat Central recently posted Movie Monday – Improv on the Big Screen.

  676. I have a little extra mound of skin on the back of my right ear. Not a flap, because it’s round. And it’s not a thickening of the skin, it’s normal skin that sticks up from the surrounding area. I can’t see it, obviously, but I imagine it as a third nipple in a really weird place.

  677. I have one too. Only mine grows just to the right of my nose on my right cheek. It will not be there the night before and when I wake up the next morning, its long enough to be hanging down by my lip. I like the idea of it being a unicorn horn hair. Mine, however, is as directionally challenged as I am, so instead of my forehead, its on my cheek. Stupid weird white unicorn horn hair…

  678. Um…I get hairs growing out of my chin, which DO show up overnight, although they’re not 3 inches. The shit that weirded me out was the first white pubic hair which I immediately plucked. (It hurt like a motherfucker, but not as much as it hurt to realize that my vagina was AGING.) Then they started coming in…well, not in droves, but let’s just say when I take one out, they just come RIGHT THE FUCK BACK. So now, I think, gee, maybe I’ll do vajazzing, which I wrote a whole blog post about eons ago and now I need to go back and find it so I can figure out how to dye my pubic hair, which, if I’m going to do that I think I’m going for purple or navy blue or teal or some shit because really, if I’m going to dye it, why not just go all the way and have fun with it? Plus how cool would it be if I were to die and during the autopsy they’re like WHOA, she has an aquamarine vagina? And then there would be an article on the internet about how mermaids are real. And that would be awesome because I love mermaids. So keep that white 3-inch hair. Mermaids and unicorns are real, bitches.

    Leila recently posted It’s Not TOTALLY That I’m Lazy.

  679. oh! i have one! i can’t take yoga classes any more, because i have a noisy vagina. hooray! (high fives everyone)

  680. p.s. i also have a couple of those weird, thin, colorless hairs. one on my forehead, one on my cheek, and i used to have one kind of on the back of my left shoulder, which i’d pluck (absently, blindly) while watching a movie in a theater. i’d generally forget about it until the previews started, and then i’d be all, “oh yeah! did that thing grow back yet? hey, there it is! (pluck)” but it seems to have left as mysteriously as it came. my dad has one on his forehead, too, which i’ll sometimes notice when he and i are in a car together, and i’ll point it out and he’ll just sort of brush it back like regular hair, all cool-style. my point is, all the cool kids have ‘em.

  681. I saw a unicorn today at the zoo and thought of you. Ok, it wasn’t a unicorn. It was a pissed off goat with one horn. He should read your blog. He needs a reason to laugh.

    Barbara recently posted Wild Ones!.

  682. I have white eyelashes that grow when I get stressed. Only when I get stressed. I have had 4 since starting my new job. Also, my sternum pops like my knuckles.

  683. I get a black hair that grows out of my chin. No matter how many times I pluck the sucker, it keeps coming back. I also have hair in my toes that I shave off and a mole on the bottom of one of my toes. I didn’t even know toes could have moles! The weirdest is that at random times, my ears will turn pink or red and feel really hot. Nothing will cool them down.

    Sorry about the next sentence, my tablet won’t let me delete it

    also have hairy toes and moles in word places ( I have one in the back of a toe. I didn’ten know tie

  684. I have a midget pinkie finger. Some say it’s a birth defect. But I prefer to think of it as the beginning of some sort of evolutionary process. In the future, no one will have pinkies.

  685. Hole between shoulders in my center back, I call it my blow hole. had it as long as I can remember, and yes I can stay under water for long time.

  686. I have white hairs growing on my chin and I have to wax my nose hair because I’m the only woman I know with more nose hair than her husband.

  687. 695
    Lady Penelope

    Ummm… so does one go to the doctor or the vet for this ‘unicorn’ affliction?

    I just finished reading ‘The Chrysalids’ and all these comments made me laugh so much harder!
    Not sure if we’re Fringes people or the evolution of our species.

    Was anyone else chanting “one of us. one of us” whilst reading this post? Just me then?

  688. Jenny, It’s funny you should ask for us to share. I just had a sleep study last night, and took photos. Go head, you can look.. and laugh, and laugh..
    http://megssimplelife.wordpress.com/2013/02/16/sleep-study-4/

    meg recently posted Sleep Study #4.

  689. I have one very thick, curly, very black hair growing out of the pink spot around my right nipple (can’t think of the word right now). It appeared just after my daughter was born, so of course she always nursed on the other side (I was not gonna pluck that fucker, so I just trimmed it as close as I could) and then my boobs were lopsided. They probably still are, but since it’s been years since I nursed and they are all deflated now, you can’t tell. At least, I can’t tell. But that damn hair is still there.

  690. 698
    attilatheblond

    Used to have a white eyelash that would grow so long I had to trim it. Now, I am very pale with ash blond eyelashes but that sucker was WHITE and it would grow about half an inch a week. Other lashes sorta stubby.

    No longer a problem, as just about all eyelashes are gone. And some home invaders also stole half of both eyebrows.

  691. I get crazy, random Andy Rooney looking white eyebrow hairs every once in a while. I turn to the side and they literally jut out of my brow ridge. I always say in a really nasally voice, “Ya ever wonder…..?” It makes me laugh.

  692. where do i start? really – i have had those hairs grow from my forehead. but they were off-center and i didn’t realize the unicorn morphing theory…. which is so much nicer than what i felt i resembled which is mythical and hairy and called sasquatch…. in the recent past, when showering, i noticed something weird on my breast. next to the areola…yes, yippee, it was this single, four inch long hair. we’re not even talking how frustrating it is to keep up with chin whiskers. and the lovely ones on the upper lip. or how horrifying it is to come home and realize you resembled salvador dali all f*g day AND NO ONE MENTIONED IT TO YOU…. oh sorry- i got carried away but i hope you feel better now…

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