Phoning it in

What’s lazier than writing a two sentence post?  Sending a topic to someone else so they’ll write something funny for you.

Big, exciting post coming, I swear to God.

Please don’t unsubscribe.

Comment of the day:  I kinda phoned mine in today. I used an excerpt from an email with another blogger. It’s all good lady.

You know once William Wallace (of Braveheart fame) phoned it in during a battle with the English. This really fucked with everyone involved since phones weren’t invented back in the 1290s. Everyone was like, “What has thou sayest William?”
“I’m phoning it in assholes.”
“What iseth a phone?”
“Just do your screaming and run at those fuckers over there, I’m phoning it in.”
“Sir Wallace, we do not knowest this phone, is it a weapon of war?”
“Like there’s other kinds of weapons? You douchebags.”
“What iseth a douchebag, Sir Wallace?”
“Iseth isn’t a word fuckface.”
And then the Scottish were all killed and Scotland became Delaware, the first colony of the United States.  ~furiousball

48 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Originality is overrated.

    Type (little) a’s last blog post..Priorites

  2. I kinda phoned mine in today, I used an excerpt from an email with another blogger. It’s all good lady.

    You know once William Wallace (of Braveheart fame) phoned it in during a battle with the English. This really fucked with everyone involved since phones weren’t invented back in the 1290s. Everyone was like, “What has thou sayest William?”
    “I’m phoning it in assholes.”
    “What iseth a phone?”
    “Just do your screaming and run at those fuckers over there, I’m phoning it in.”
    “Sir Wallace, we do not knowest this phone, is it a weapon of war?”
    “Like there’s other kinds of weapons? You douchebags.”
    “What iseth a douchebag, Sir Wallace?”
    “Iseth isn’t a word fuckface.”
    And then the Scottish were all killed and Scotland became Delaware, the first colony of the United States.

    furiousball’s last blog post..only you could find gold fodder amongst cat shit

  3. I started out clean but I’m jaded,
    Just phoning it in
    Just breaking the skin

    pookie addams’s last blog post..travel sounding up

  4. Whatever FuriousBall said…Me Too!

    That Freaky Face Robot Thing…well, you don’t even have to move your cursor when you visit The Asylum today.

    Now, am I supposed to create a post for you? Would you repeat the directions?

    Swampy’s last blog post..Hit Me with Your Best Shot…

  5. You can’t get rid of me that easily.

    -R-‘s last blog post..Clever Title

  6. we can’t quit you.

    that lady that follows your pointer? her eyes are red, which made me wonder if she was high.

    piglet’s last blog post..thursday was funny

  7. I’m just getting used to this blog thing. You’re upping the ante of technology too fast.

    Headless Mom’s last blog post..I Know What My Next Career Won’t Be

  8. p.s. i just read the comments on the geekologie site and they think she’s high too. by the way, do you have any idea who is behind the superficial curtain? geekologie is tied to superficial, and the world is dying of curiosity. (the world has left comments on my site asking if i knew.)

    piglet’s last blog post..thursday was funny

  9. You could always post nak ed photos of Daniel Craig or, say, Viggo Mortensen, on the days when you don’t feel like writing. I’ve considered it, though it would trash my PG-13 rating.

    But even without them, we’ll still hang around.

    Jennifer H’s last blog post..Fears and Events and Prayers, Part III

  10. You should do reruns.

    Spamboy’s last blog post..Advice from Photo Matt

  11. /unscrubscribe

    /?

    /unsubscrib

    /qwit

    /help

  12. Phoning in in.. hmmm… I can’t wait for the exciting post! 🙂

    Beth from The Funny Farm’s last blog post..Horse’s Teeth!

  13. Meh. I just wrote two two-sentences posts in a row. It’s Friday, beyatch. (Pronounced “bay-atch.” I’m so tired of “bee-otch.”)

    BTW, your word today is: azygous. adj. Odd, unpaired.

    ali’s last blog post..Google Analytics makes me nervous for humanity

  14. Sorry sweets, luv ya but I don’t keep on slackers. 😉

    One must write at least a 500 word essay to get my respect.

    Or…know how to do the Humpty Dance.

    You do know how to do the Humpty Dance, don’t you?

    😉

    Julie Pippert’s last blog post..The sound of ultimate suffering (facetiously) plus a dedication to my Spring deprived friends

  15. Ooohhh liking how Jennifer H thinks. I’m requesting Scott Elrod, please, pretty please. he’s like Jared Leto only not illegal. or beyond that complicated math age calculation thing. (And if I’m wrong, never, ever tell me.)

    Julie Pippert’s last blog post..The sound of ultimate suffering (facetiously) plus a dedication to my Spring deprived friends

  16. Well hello again!

    I had to go look. I went and looked.

    He’s younger than Jared Leto who is older than I thought!

    1971 (Leto) and 1975 (Elrod)

    That’s like 5 seconds younger than me in you know, practically real time.

    (Although you are still on thin ice for pointing out the waiter thought I was Kyla’s mother! LOL!)

    Okay well then, this opens up a whole new realm of possibilities and removes the Mrs. Robinson label.

    Smack my fanny and call me a happy pony at a circus.

    🙂

    Julie Pippert’s last blog post..The sound of ultimate suffering (facetiously) plus a dedication to my Spring deprived friends

  17. “nak ed photos of Daniel Craig or, say, Viggo M.”

    Yeah, that would be acceptable in a pinch.

    pookie addams’s last blog post..travel sounding up

  18. So let me get this straight:

    You’re so lazy ET is writing posts for you now?

    And you’ve got links to links for Cyborg Sistahs???

    Dah-link, you’re so extra-terrestrial these days. Lazy, yes, but totally outta this world.

    PENSIEVE’s last blog post..How RUDE not to provide the definition for the previous post (No wonder I look like Andy Warhol!)

  19. She is scary enough without going to the website! I’d like to sleep tonight, so I’m not checking her out, kay?

    Carrie’s last blog post..Crushed

  20. I think I believe you.

    Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..HF: Death to the Peacock

  21. Like I could leave you. This blog and its comments are my new source of crack.

    Becky Mochaface’s last blog post..Tramp stamps & office pranks

  22. That’s just disturbing. I especially don’t like how blood-shot her eyes look. Like, is she freaky AND terribly hung-over? And what would a creepy cursor-follower inbibe anyway?

    Ms. Huis Herself’s last blog post..Conversation Overheard

  23. just found u, can’t stop now 🙂

    thanks too for the poop thoughts – u r very correct!!

    amanda’s last blog post..giddy

  24. Cool, I’m phoning in my comment too on account of I’m sick with the plague…or leprosy…or something.

    Pretend I said something really kickass funny.

    Greta’s last blog post..From the Royal Canadian Air Force, to Jazzercize, to the Sound of Crickets Chirping

  25. didn’t unsubscribe. i promise.

    CC’s last blog post..Funny Friday: Health precations

  26. Oh you are so lucky you said please. I was about to obliterate you off my reader. But you did use the magic word.

    Maggie’s last blog post..Day Four – Out among the living and Poetry Friday Away

  27. Two sentences can often be better than 500 words. This must be true since you get more comments than I do. Not bitter. No…not me.

    AB’s last blog post..A New Normal

  28. LMAO

  29. Only you could get a shiteload of comments for a 2 sentence post.

    How about posting your shopping list? *snort*

    I saw that freaky chick the other day and man she gave me nightmares with her bleeding eyes and now MPS is in lurve…

    Kelley’s last blog post..Just give me the freaking envelope asshat.

  30. I tried to get her to cross her eyes by putting the cursor on her nose, apparently this is a cyborg failing because she can’t cross her eyes.

    I’m so lame.

    Kat’s last blog post..Severe Anxiety

  31. Hey, I just finished a post recycling something I wrote, then forgot about, and found again through Propeller. It’s strange when you find your own work floating around out there.

    Jessica’s last blog post..Bridal health…for actual brides

  32. Well, I’m SUBSCRIBING! That’s fashizzle! Awesome post! 😉

    Haley-O’s last blog post..Do You Want to Hear More About My Love Affair With My Gym? Or, Less?

  33. Oh, and you know what’s even more pathetic? Approving a comment you know is spam because it makes you sound good.

    Case in point:
    […] Jessica sure knows how to captivate the audience. A recent post was published on Bridal healthâ […]

    ^They say that to all the girls.

    PS Did you know I’m a celeb bride?

    Jessica’s last blog post..Bridal health…for actual brides

  34. I’m a very patient person.

    Corinne’s last blog post..Making A New Elephriend

  35. hey! you can blog about hanging out with me next weekend!

  36. Too lazy to unsubscribe…
    😉

    amanda’s last blog post..May I introduce you to my last nerve?

  37. alt-q
    esc

    oh crap…the cmd’s not working…you’re stuck with me. lucky you. 😉

    The Pear Lady’s last blog post..Brought to you by the letter C

  38. Dude, the other day I wrote a post about ripping off my toenail.

    I much prefer your brevity and Princess Stonerpants.

  39. Jenny, your blog doesn’t like me, it’s not letting me leave comments. So I’m not going to say anything interesting in case this one doesn’t post either.

    Kat’s last blog post..Severe Anxiety

  40. I would SO win a chickfight with you. I’m just sayin’.

  41. I hate to tell you this, but
    someone is ripping off your nom-du-Internet.

    {sits back in anticipation of impending chickfight}

    ~EdT.

    Ed T.’s last blog post..Hail to the Queen

  42. I think you could probably successfully pull off a one sentence post. (If you haven’t already done it.) Or even a no sentence post. Seriously 😉

    simplypink’s last blog post..let’s get physical in xanadu

  43. The news of your upcoming big exciting post (but aren’t they all?) kept me up last night………well,……now that I think about it, it was probably creepy cursor girl keeping me awake. Her crazy red eyes are burned into my (VERY tired) brain forever…

    Dianna’s last blog post..I’m not dead (I think)

  44. Jenny, I just can’t wait for your new post. So, I’m gonna set up my computer to refresh this screen like, 10 25 50 times every second, until it comes out. ‘K?

    ~EdT.

    Ed T.’s last blog post..Imagination in Flight

  45. The MOMocrats Motto: “We are made of Awesome.” Naturally, we would publish your astute political commentary, once we put down the crack pipe long enough to actually post something.

    Glennia’s last blog post..California Democratic Convention: Who Wants to Be Governor of California?

  46. Well, I’m hooked – Photos of dogs copulating, Hillary Clinton’s blow job prowess. Bring it sister. I could use a little more of this stuff in my life.

  47. I know you’re not leaving us for that Good-Mom Bad-Mom blog, right? You’re not leaving us to join some tiresome politico-junkie site either, right? I know everyone wants a piece of the Bloggess – just don’t forget the little people blah-blah-blah etcetera.

    Red Flashlight’s last blog post..The View From my Desk

  48. 48
    Lady Penelope

    Isn’t that what the cocktail party blogs were all about?

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