Shut up, cats

I’m alive.  Barely.  I can hear cats whispering blocks away.  That’s how much my head hurts right now.  It’s probably from all the Puerto Rican sun and not from the fact that I drank half my weight in rum.

I swear I have amazing stories for you but right now I just need to lay my head down for a few minutes.

 Someone shut those fucking cats up.

A few pictures here if you just can’t wait.

PS.  I’m not a drug addict.  Thanks for asking.

Comment of the day:  Dude, when I’m in your position, I can hear people eating marshmallows.  Those marshmallow eating bastards are loud.  ~Type (little) a

31 thoughts on “Shut up, cats

Read comments below or add one.

  1. Glad you’re back, safe and sound.

    I could hear the cats on Saturday.

    Now… Go drink a glass of water, take two excedrin and two tums, and lay down!

    Gretchen’s last blog post..First Quilt

  2. Yay! You’re home. Now I can stop stalking your website and just hit refresh eleven billionty times. Kidding, I kid.
    Did you happen to bring home any extra rum with you? Because last night my f-i-l tried to kill me with a pork chop. And now I think I’m in mah last hours. Alcohol would probably help.

    FabGirl’s last blog post..And to Think We Let him Watch Our Kids (to this day*)

  3. We like to tempt my sister with the skin from cold oatmeal when she’s hungover. That, or the skin from gravy. Or runny eggs. Once, in Vegas, we made her go through the buffet line at a shift change at the Excalibur as punishment for getting trashed and flashing her tits at everyone in front of Caesar’s Palace instead of being at our niece’s rehearsal dinner.

    Mary’s last blog post..Bad TV Flashback

  4. I know the call of that rum…it is practically irresistible. Good thing you don’t live in my neighborhood. My cat is the world’s most annoying cat even when you’re completely sober. Thinks he’s Pavarotti, but he can’t sing. Try anointing yourself with lots of B complex and water. Feel better soon. Incredible pictures, by the way.

    Kat’s last blog post..The Arboretum

  5. Glad you’re back. Now I won’t have to feel like a loser going back through the archives to find a laugh. Or try to self-medicate because the daughter is getting too.grown-up.already. (Seriously. She went to prom. I can’t get past this. Oh, sorry. This blog is all about you. My bad.)

    Headless Mom’s last blog post..You Asked For It, You Got It *

  6. [quote]Now I’m standing here waiting patiently for drunken Puerto Rican stories.[/quote]

    Then you should probably move to New York City. They have more Puerto Ricans than Puerto Rico ever had, before they all moved to NYC.

  7. I’d feel bad for you about the headache and the cats, except for where you were. Ok, maybe I do feel a bit bad for you. But seriously, I’d kill for a vacation. Hey want some dead cats in trade for taking me in your suitcase next time?

    Kidding….sort of.

    Phoenix’s last blog post..5 Things and six words

  8. We’re so glad you’re back! You don’t know what it’s like to have Bloggess withdrawals. Because you never leave yourself. Well, maybe, depending on how much drum you rink.

  9. Oh good. So you took $y “lots of rum” suggestion and ran with it. Serves you right for going to PR when I was stuck at Passover with my in-laws. Ass****.

    Welcome back, and don’t let the cats get too brutal. I heard they were making fun of your drunken limbo.

    ali’s last blog post..The one where I piss off all the religious people

  10. I am surprised you managed to type, usually the sound y little metallic keyboard is enough to make me hurl. If I was there I’d bring you a Gatorade and some KFC. xx

  11. Welcome back. Rum is a fat old dirty whore. I think I am finally recovered from an experience I had with her OVER A WEEK AGO.

    I’m so glad you’ve finally been outed as a drug addict as I have a flatbed full of horse tranq with your name on it.

    Jennifer’s last blog post..In Other News…

  12. Freaking whispering cats. They are Ninjas you realise. They will sneak into your house with there freaky little ninja moves, wearing their little masks and crap in your shoes.

    Stupid freaking ninja cats whispering… the only way to defeat them is more rum.

    Kelley’s last blog post..Do. Not. Want.

  13. When I have migraines I can hear my cats walking.


    In the livingroom.

    Through closed doors.

    Migraines suck.

    I imagine that hangovers suck, too, but at least you got to have fun first. Welcome back!

    Hatchet’s last blog post..A Musical Interlude

  14. Ummm, wait~ I’m only here because liv ASSURED me you were a drug addict? Mebee she meant alcoholic? If so, I’m in like Flynn for BlogHer – woohoo!

    qt’s last blog post..Trail Names & Totems

  15. Hey not to go off topic but can anyone give me overview of. New York Car Insurance Reform 295 Greenwich St, New York, NY 10007 (646) 351-0824 They can be down the block from me. I was wondering if they were a good insurance agency. I need to find coverage, it is regulations you know, but I need to have a good price price plus I’d prefer friendly service.

  16. … when you can actually hear yourself blink and you lie and wait for the marshmallow eating bastards to come finish you off.

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