Conversation I had this morning with my coworker, Christine, who gets mad when I call her “my coworker” instead of “my kick-ass friend”. So just to clarify, she’s both.
Me: Dude! I’m totally the top story on Geekologie!
Me: Yes! Pull it up!
Top story on Geekologie:
Me: Oh. That’s not me.
Me: Just…go further down.
Christine: “Robotic spider to destroy Liverpool on Friday“?
Me: Fuck. Keep scrolling. Wait…there!
Christine: “Woman gets confusing box of LEGO parts“?
Me: Yeah! I’m “Woman”!
Then I walked next door to my other co-worker’s office and was like “Hey! I was on Geekologie!” and then she’s all “Geek-what-ogie?”” and then I give her a look of profound disappointment and explain that it’s like the Gadgety counterpart of The Superficial so I pull it up and she’s like “The hell? When did you get tranny legos?” and I’m all “YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW ME AT ALL!” and then I went into my office and cried a little. Inside. And then I made some super-complicated pivot-tables in excel and my computer crashed and I half suspect that it’s bringing down the entire company server and I’m afraid to ask if anyone else’s computer is slow now in case they suspect that I caused it.
And then my super-nice boss came in and said “My daughter showed me your blog yesterday and we watched that video where you keep yelling the c-word and I kept telling my daughter ‘That is not the sweet Jenny I know!'” and then I was like “I’M MULTI-FACETED!” And then I realized I was yelling. Also I just found out I’m being relocated to another building like a mile away from all of them. I’m pretty sure none of this is related.
Comment of the day: Where’d you find that cool artsy photo of two alien children sharing a Coke? It’s just so darn cute. ~ I can’t read my nametag
103 thoughts on “I don’t entirely fit in here.”
Read comments below or add one.
Darlin’…you are “Multifaceted” and so much more!!!
Oh and a F-in’ Genius!
Jenn’s last blog post..If I Had Known…
Sorry… Fortunately they hadn’t posted the X-rays of the standard phone with the cord I had tried to sneak into jail.
Bad idea… the cord was nowhere NEAR long enough to get to my cell.
Houston’s last blog post..Jury Selection For Eric’s Trial
I thought I was so creative stashing my phone in my bra, like a chipmunk with big old nut stashing cheeks. Some days I keep pulling stuff out of there, like gum balls, shorty pencils, and gas station receipts, and ofcourse, eventually, the phone. It’s easier to locate when it’s ringing.
clickmom’s last blog post..drink up
You’re not multi-faceted, you’re full of mosquitoes. lol
You’re also the one who crashed the whole building’s server. WAY TO GO!
Rhea’s last blog post..War & Peace…in the carpool line
I always walk that thin line between wanting people to know “the real/fun/irreverent me” on my blog and the version of me they THINK they know.
I hate keeping my blog from certain friends and family.
On the other hand, I kinda live by the rule,
If they can’t take a fuck,
I’m so JEALOUS…I’ll I got on Geekologie was a little thing at the bottom of the Bigfoot is fake story something that said “Thanks to so and so, so and so and Gingela 5 for sending in the story” And you being moved probably has something to do with Chuck…
gingela5’s last blog post..Bitterness Brings Out My Good Side…
So… do you think they were plannig on using those phones once they removed them? Because that is just sick.
Oh, and congrats on the whole geekologie thing!
Bringing up Geekologie’s stats while crashing the company’s server? You can add “multi-tasking” to your accomplishments as well. Nice!
Sprite’s Keeper’s last blog post..Fay, you suck.
Oh, and I wonder if roaming charges are incurred while inside the human body… Just wondering, not willing to test it. Thanks.
Sprite’s Keeper’s last blog post..Fay, you suck.
Where’d you find that cool artsy photo of two alien children sharing a Coke? It’s just so darn cute.
i bet they totally had the phone on vibrate. Hey, we all need a bit of pleasure sometime.
Only a mile away” Huh.
Tracey’s last blog post..Kilgore Falls- It’s a Heck of a Long Way Down
I need a co-worker like you…does pivot tables AND has tranny legos!
Kristine’s last blog post..Raising a Republican
Oh you only say the “C-word” what, three times in that video? DEFINITELY the sweet Jenny she knows. Where are they moving you?
Miss Grace’s last blog post..And then I fell over and died
The legos tranny parts still freak me out. Good luck on the relocation. If the new office-mates ask about the incidents from your office now make sure to say “NO that was the OTHER Jenny”
KD @ A Bit Squirrelly’s last blog post..How Having Kids Has Actually HELPED my bank account
Why the bossman keep watching it over and over???
I am sure none of those incidents are related?!?!?!?!
Average Girl’s last blog post..Our New Found Pet(s) errrrr……..
So this building that they’re moving you to… Did they mention whether there’d be any other people there or is it just going to be you?
Steve’s last blog post..Bed Covers
If you can manage to choke down those Legos and get an x-ray, I bet you’ll make it to the top again.
t2ed’s last blog post..The Best Mousepad Ever
I found you through Geekologie!! Of course I did think you were a tranny with a cell phone stuck up your ass, but oh well.
They just can’t handle how uncool they compared to you. Don’t want you near enough for comparisons to be made.
MammaLoves’s last blog post..Gustav: I Want to be Wrong
Multi-faceted is just another was of saying nutty. Yes, you are, sweet Jenny, yes you are. God Save The Bloggess.
always home and uncool’s last blog post..Not About Sarah Palin. Sorta.
I am SO going to see if there’s an opening for you in our office.
Don Mills Diva’s last blog post..A Leather Tragedy Turned Supple
I wish I had a job where someone would pay me to play on the internet all day.
Wish I could write in green.
With I could relocate to that cubicle 2 miles away from everyone else.
I’ll stop wishing now and go and throw some slug pellets around the garden.
Maddy’s last blog post..Thursday 13 – The Crown Jewels revealed
at least you don’t have a cell phone stuck in your “C-word”.
how funny was comment #10?
amyz5’s last blog post..Yesternight
If my coworkers knew about my blog, I’d get fired, then probably attacked by a mob of angry hillbillies, weilding weed whackers and throwing empty Mountain Dew cans.
Mahala’s last blog post..Trolls, Black Floods and Smelly Solutions
Do you think standard text messaging rates apply in that situation?
blissfully caffeinated’s last blog post..John McCain Is Sarah Palin’s Beeyotch
Thanks for being the most consistent source of chuckles on the internet.
Writer Dad’s last blog post..I Heart DVD’s
New reader here! Did I comment yet? Who knows. Anyhow, just stopping by to say you are one of my new favorite reads. You make me lol lol lol all the way home.
I kinda wish that was your bum with the phone in it though. Because I am really curious how they got it out of there.
Amanda’s last blog post..Who the hell is this Kim Kardashian person?
it’s one thing to break into a little chuckle at work.
totally different to go into one of my laughing, snorting, hacking fits…i’ve been told i sound like all sorts of things, but generally a guinea pig.
and that’s only from the little side of me my coworkers (who are not kick-ass friends, a la Christine) see day to day.
i am afraid for them to someday experience my true insanity. because i’m sure in my case, i’d get shipped off to our west coast office, and that’d be sad.
also, i hate pivot tables. excel=death of me. good thing that’s 98% of the job…
gathering dust’s last blog post..Getting a little political…
If I go back into the workforce I pray I’ll have a co-worker like you!
Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommy’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday #13 – When Dad Makes Dinner
I can’t believe that McCain chose Sarah Palin over you.
Marinka’s last blog post..Fewer Words Than Usual Wednesday
WHAT’S WRONG WITH BEING MULTIFACETED!?
And what is all the hype about hiding things in your ass, hello, they ALWAYS look there!
brittany’s last blog post..I saw Jesus in Ikea
That x-ray reminded me of the episode of “House” where some kid shoved an mp3 player up his ass. At least his ass was able to play music, all this person got was a weird ringtone.
Sam (The Edge OF Insanity)’s last blog post..“Sam, Do You Want To Play?”
That phone is going to be a betch to pass.
Jenny, fitting in is highly overrated. 😉
Issa’s last blog post..Announcements for the day
Ok…I try to do pivot sort thingys in Excel and sometimes it works but if it does it usually takes like an extra two or three hours more than it should have and no one is as impressed by it as I had imagined they would be and then someone always sends it back to me and it’s ruined, but I don’t notice and I save the fucked-up version over the good version
When I read “multi-faceted” from you, what I hear is a poly-polar behavioral rationalization that begs for you to be isolated from the general population of faith-based employees.
Oh, it’s great that you were on geek whatever.
Sometimes people are really,really smart and say something witty in the comments and everyone is all “LOL!!111” and we all sit back and laugh and laugh and laugh and just appreciate the hell out of that person and then we stop.
And then there are times when people post a stupid comment on the wrong post and everyone is all “dipshit.”
I am one of those people.
Kurt’s last blog post..Random Friday Blog
My 6 yr old totally loved your legos! He wanted some just like yours, only star wars (whatever that means – crossdressing star wars lego guys, hmmm, maybe I need to have a talk with him).
How do you get a whole box of just lego people anyway?
mrs b roth’s last blog post..Everything That Must Be Said In No Particular Order
Being multi-faceted is like wearing fancy underwear, nobody but you and a chosen few get the pleasure of it.
mtnhighmama’s last blog post..WallFlower Wednesday
I can’t believe you still have a job there. Didn’t Dooce get fired for this type of thing? Anyway, I did *not* know about Geekologie, so thanks for that.
PS- I was on Boing Boing once and I called every single family member with a computer to share the news. Only 2 of them had ever heard of it, so most didn’t understand why I thought I deserved a party.
PPS- I’m glad you don’t have a cell phone up your bum and/or cooch.
I saw those tranny legos on Geekologie this morning and I was all “I know that Woman!” Lol, awesome.
I wonder if they’re moving you to a cloister, like a nun…..you may want to stick a cell phone up your cooch just in case. Oh, and put it on vibrate!
Karyn’s last blog post..Nothing to say
I wouldn’t wanna work at any faith-based organization that didn’t promote use of the C-word.
Are you not talking about Christ?
I’m going to watch the video now with my kids. brb.
The Cotton Wife’s last blog post..The Dove Hunt
Wow. How did they poo?
Thanks for reminding me that I totally forgot WTF Wednesday. D’oh!
Jessica’s last blog post..WTF Wednesday…er Thursday: Lego Edition
I just fell off the couch laughing.
Of course it’s not related.
rachel’s last blog post..The Sister She Always Wanted
At least now you can yell the C word at the walls with no one having to hear you.
Maybe you’ll fit in better at the new building. You certainly fit in well here though!
Wendy’s last blog post..More Glimpses of Tripp
None of this has anything to do with why you were moved.
No ma’am, they made that decision when you guffawed during prayer. Der.
Is multi-faceted anything like bi-polar? Cause I’m all about making my crazy sound prettier. Sort of gives it a blingy feel.
I’m sure your faith-based employer is just thrilled shitless about your c-word dropping on the internet….oh wait…not the CHRIST word…the OTHER c-word….ahhh, happy moving.
Anissa@Hope4Peyton’s last blog post..Perspective, getcha some
I keep my blog from certain people too. Mostly because I’m afraid they will read it and see that I’m not really as interesting as they think I am.
Jessie’s last blog post..Not so “wordless” Wednesday
yay woman!!! i think.
flutter’s last blog post..Therapy notes: Why are you concentrating on that?
My server crashed this morning and I’m pretty sure it was your fault. And just who the hell would want to make a phone call on a phone stuck up someones ass?! Wait….I don’t really want to know the answer to that. I also hope I’ve never borrowed a cell phone that was stuck up someones ass and made a phone call on it. Oh crap I better go call my shrink!
Kile’s last blog post..Tuesday….umm Wednesday?…Smackdown…ish..or something
Please relocate to my building! Please, please, please! I mean, it’s not like I’m getting any work done anyway. (But don’t tell Chuck.)
Multifaceted genius! You could write a guide to getting your company to pay to relocate you to your own office space down road. Complete with tranny legos. Also, new office must be located next door to zombie/vampire cemetary.
fruitlady’s last blog post..A Good Month – August 2008 Revisited
Wherever you DO fit in. I wanna be there.
The Laundress’s last blog post..“So the days float through my eyes… But still the days seem the same”
I recently got moved to another office, too. But I’m pretty sure it was because I kept farting.
bejewell’s last blog post..A Conversation with Myself from Five Years Ago – The Beginning
It’s not you that doesn’t fit in. It’s everyone else that doesn’t fit in with you.
Becky Mochaface’s last blog post..Hump Day Humor: Dark Knight Spoof
Guess what? You are now an email forward. I got the lego story forwarded to me randomly today. You are making the haha rounds across the globe!
cloudy’s last blog post..MY REASON
Today I almost burnt down my entire office after making sparks fly out of my computer monitor.
They haven’t moved me yet.
Diane’s last blog post..There she goes
You remind me of David Sedaris – when are you going to publish a book?
Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome’s last blog post..Practicing Flexibility to Remain Steady – Full Text Answers
that’s awesome you were featured on geekologie! luckily it was just the lego story and you didn’t have to have cell phone surgery…shudder.
katelin’s last blog post..Autumn is awesome (most of the time).
Hmmm…..yeah, that might be the reason you’re being moved.
I wish they would move me.
Maybe if I stood up and yelled the “C” word at the top of my lungs…maybe.
Emily’s last blog post..Some Funny to Break Up the Serious
Just wait, Diane. They’ll be telling you in a couple of days.
BTW, Jenny, don’t be making fun of Chuck. I’m a member of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster: http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/ <– (that’s the letter that we sent to the Kansas school board about teaching Non-intelligent Design theories in their classrooms), so if you’re going to make fun of something, make fun of all of the morons who faithfully give 10% of their incomes to some asshole who stands behind a podium on Sundays, just because he told them they should.
So apparently I’m chopped liver over here in your new building. I’m so excited you are coming BACK over here and working near me I wet myself a little!
Did I tell you we are moving you into office 1313 Squid? he he he I bet that made you wet yourself a lot or at least squirm a little didn’t it?
for what it’s worth, i knew about you before geekology, so really, they should be the ones that are impressed with being featured on your blog!
SEO Hack’s last blog post..3M Corporation Bankrupt?
I am not multi-faceted. I am totally one-dimensional. I yell the “C” word everywhere and yet, still, no one knows me.
shonda’s last blog post..If I Think It’s Tacky, Lord, It Is!
In re: your being the top story on Geekology.
I laughed so hard I cried once I read the headline on the screen capture. I haven’t stopped yet. It huuuuuurrrrrrrts.
And then I scrolled up just now and really got a good eyefull of the visual. And it set me off all over again.
Some days you’re the prisoner, and some days you’re the cellphone.
Sallyacious’s last blog post..Long-Ass Day
I so love you–you say all the things that I wish I was brave enough to say…
Give me courage, oh Chuck. I wanna be Blogess when I grow up, wait…I don’t wanna grow up…I’m a TOYS R US kid…
Martie’s last blog post..Superwoman…
Ps I cant even SAY the C word. I hardly can THINK it…
Martie’s last blog post..Superwoman…
Oh. And in relation to the “c-word” I had a roomful of college freshmen using it last spring. That’s right, people, I’m in charge of shaping your children’s minds.
Sallyacious’s last blog post..Long-Ass Day
For a minute, I could not figure out if you were featured on Geek-loogie, or Geek-orgy. That dyslexia is a real bicht.
I say, don’t give up until you have a geek trifecta.
anne nahm’s last blog post..Waterworks
This blog is SO educational to me. Geekologie? The Superficial? Am I living under a rock here? WHO KNEW?
This is some nice additional knowledge to complement my earlier education re: Lego being so forward thinking and open minded. Who knew THAT, either?
Lesley’s last blog post..Maybe I Can Win “Best Post Title” For This Post Title!
I so wish I had known that cell phone trick in high school when all my teachers kept trying to take it away…damn.
E!’s last blog post..And the Beat Goes On…
OK. I would just die if my boss read my blog, not that I ever have videos of myself yelling the C (see you next tuesday) word. And those prisoners with the cell phones! I can’t even believe they did surgery on any of them. THEY’RE PRISONERS! What a great way to spend our tax dollars! They put the cell phones there. Let them deal with it. Oh my! I sound like a hearless b, don’t I? Well, I didn’t put a cell phone up MY butt!
Shoegirl’s last blog post..I Love Houston in the Fall
I am fast converting from friend to rabid fan. Love your writing always Jenny!
Lotta’s last blog post..What’s Next…Franklin Mint Plates?
Haha. Dear lord woman. You’re odd. 😀
Trey Anderson’s last blog post..Welcome !!
How do you hang onto that job at all?
Tranny Legos will make you famous. Tranny liasons will make you infamous.
jenboglass’s last blog post..Friends Don’t Let Friends Dance and Drive. At Least My Family Doesn’t
You got relocated? Does this mean you’ll be closer to my parents & we can finally do lunch?
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..Calgon Stat (A Story of Survival you Might See on a Lifetime Movie)
Apparently, I’m multi-faceted too. I’ve been reprimanded at work for being too quiet, but people on Twitter want me to shut up. I guess I’m only an introvert in the three-dimensional world.
The Introvert’s last blog post..taxicab confessions
Did it hurt when you got the cell phone removed? I mean, you don’t have to embarrassed about it. You can admit the cell phone x-ray is yours. We understand.
superblondgirl’s last blog post..Thought Process During Savasana
Well, *I* saw “I’m totally the top story on Geekologie!” and completely pooped my pants in excitement. I’m with you girlfriend.
Aimee Greeblemonkey’s last blog post..The Video Game Conundrum
The c-word works at a faith-based workplace doesn’t it? It’s all natural. Congrats on being ‘the woman’ no congrats on your pivot tables though.
Jim’s last blog post..College Etiquette for Students
Relocated? I’m in tear.. tears of laughter! I think I just woke up my whole family from laughter!
imelda’s last blog post..Edited with Picnik – so many options! [Flickr]
I got moved to a different office once. I was moved out of a building with people into one across the camp where I was all by myself. “AWESOME!” I thought. A couple months later, someone remembered I was there and totally laid me off. Funny thing is, I thought that was pretty awesome, too. I don’t predict unemployment in your future, though, because that’s not one of my talents.
foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog)’s last blog post..‘you got the teeth of the hydra upon you’
i was just mentioning this to my sister tonight on the phone, the superficial’s sister site geekologie. i pronounced it like geek LOOGIE and she laughed for about three hours. then she said, leah it’s geek-OLOGY. then she asked if i was being serious, and i said straight up serious.
i thought would be a good tie in to announcing that an old neighborhood butcher shop we used to frequent was held up last night, but the cashier shot the robber guy. i said you remember the shamrock food KINTER don’t you? (center, pronounced KINTER). get it? i was six at the time, it’s an old family joke.
you are awesome. every single day.
piglet’s last blog post..whatever you do, don’t tell my mom about any of this.
So, they moved you to a new building? So long as it isn’t called the “Texas Workforce Commission”, you should at least get some peace and quiet. And maybe a server of your own to crash.
Ed T.’s last blog post..Merrie Olde Texas!
Heh, yeah. I told someone that I know in real life (and live down the street from) that I have a blog and now she’s totally stalking me. IN REAL LIFE! It was like, until that point I was just some freak who never talked to anyone and now I’m the funniest person she knows.
Kylie’s last blog post..Hippies Are Like Jeans
i enjoy reading your words
they make me smile
this is SO brilliant. all of it.
ms picket to you’s last blog post..Packed Up, Nowhere to Go
Holly hell. Just discovered this place today (yes, have been living under a rock, apparently), and honestly. You should publish a warning on this thing that says do not eat while ‘drinking coffe/diet coke/water or eating pita bread with turkey breast & tomato filling’. All of which have come out of my nose at various times today while reading your site. F*cking hillarious. You are now my poster girl for… everything. *Meant in a non-stalker fashion*.
FruGal’s last blog post..Good FruGal, Bad FruGal
Shit, I meant ‘read’, not ‘eat’. Beetle juice, beetle juice… Obviously I am not eating your site.
FruGal’s last blog post..Good FruGal, Bad FruGal
I just found you tonight through MamaKat & you just about made me piss my pants you are so stinkin’ funny! (I promise I have better bladder control than I let on.)
Lacey’s last blog post..Rehab Help & A Worthwhile Cause
I also found you through Mama Kat. Serious, this was so funny. You are HILARIOUS! I can’t wait to stop back by!
Randi’s last blog post..guess what?!?!
This is even more ironic given that you work for a faith based company. I am cracking up, even though I have faith, because I am sure God has a sense of humor given that this made me laugh out loud. Or I am eternally in trouble, too.
Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING’s last blog post..At which table would I sit?
Mama Kat sent me (http://mamakatslosinit.blogspot.com/) and she asked me to make sure I told you this because she wants to be as loved as much as you!
Very funny post, video is hilarious!
Molly’s last blog post..Pretty Expensive Woman
LOVE your video! Too funny! Damn those trolls! Mama kat sent me here and you both ROCK!!
Katrina’s last blog post..PSA- Car seats!
You worrying about “not getting comments” is like Mary Kate Olsen worrying about being fat. And it makes me Kirstie Alley.
Great video of you at BlogHer!
Shawnte’s last blog post..Wishing I could freeze time like Zack Morris
Go Affirmation Girl!
jyl @ mommygossip’s last blog post..Serious Sunday—How Do I Teach Culture to My Children?
Thank you for linking me to thebloggess. I may never be the same. I think that’s a good thing?
nie nie’s sister will be on the today show today. tuesday. in the first hour. watch it. or, you know, don’t.
this shit is hilarious. this is better than Hello Larry, the Different Strokes sitcom that wast not The Facts Of Life.
Who the fuck is Mick Jagger’s last blog post..China Blocks Access to iTunes Store | Listening Post from Wired.com