You people scare me and I sort of love it. – Page 3

IT’S HAPPENING. IT’S REALLY HAPPENING.

I got an email from editor saying “HAPPY PUB DAY!” and I was like, there’s a special day just for going to pubs? My God, we released my book on exactly the right day, but then I realized “pub” was short for “published” and OMG ::KERMIT FLAIL:: Y’ALL, MY BOOK IS OUT TODAY. Did youContinue reading “IT’S HAPPENING. IT’S REALLY HAPPENING.”

UPDATED: The Church of Bloggessianism. Choose your title, strangelings.

A few weeks ago I was accidentally made the leader of a church which doesn’t actually exist and now we have over 2,000 members. I’m pretty sure than makes me some sort of Pope so please send me hats. More about that here if you missed it. We decided that it would be nice to have someContinue reading “UPDATED: The Church of Bloggessianism. Choose your title, strangelings.”

I fixed it for you.

Yesterday I got an email from a very sweet girl who wanted to tell me how happy she was to have found “this tribe of bizarre stranglings” because she finally figured out she wasn’t alone and there were others out there like her. And it was very lovely, although I did think it was oddContinue reading “I fixed it for you.”

Search terms that make me question what’s going on in your life.

Every so often I look at the things people were searching for on the internet that brought them to this blog. Then I shake my head at humanity. Then I copy the least offensive but most baffling searches and share them here with you. Because I’m a giver. What people were searching for on theContinue reading “Search terms that make me question what’s going on in your life.”

Pimp out your shit. Not literally though. Unless you’re selling feces. Then you might have a problem.

Just a quick thank you. The cost to keep this blog up are stupid expensive but I’m incredibly lucky that so many people support the blog by buying space in the sidebars. Lots of them are writers and bloggers themselves and you should totally do yourself a favor and check them out because they’re lovely,Continue reading “Pimp out your shit. Not literally though. Unless you’re selling feces. Then you might have a problem.”

Strangest search terms of the week

Once again, the strangest things people were searching for last week that brought them to thebloggess.com: “ivaginated penis” (I don’t…what?) “does pegasus really exist?” (Yes! But they’re made of plastic zebras and leftover pieces of cows and geese. So, I guess, no. Never mind.) “I lost an hour.” (It’s probably daylight savings time. Or alienContinue reading “Strangest search terms of the week”