Wil Wheaton made my heart grow three sizes

I’ve written before about the ridiculous things that make me #furiouslyhappy.  This one’s going on that list.

This weekend is Dragon*Con, and if you’re anything like me, you wish you were there, while simultaneously being so glad to avoid the throngs of people that would surely bring on massive panic attacks.  If you’re anything like 90% of the rest of the world, you have no damn idea what Dragon*Con even is, and you also wonder when you got so old, and why beards are so complicated nowadays.  Luckily, almost all of my readers are the cool 10% who realize that Dragon*Con is the biggest pop culture/sci fi convention in the world, or who will pretend they already knew that right after reading this sentence.

But this is beside the point.  The point is that this weekend I was flooded with emails from people at Dragon*Con telling me that Wil Wheaton was speaking, and signing autographs.  Autographs of himself COLLATING PAPER.  (Confused?  See this post.)

In fact, my tenacious friend Sarah braved the lines to get me this:

Wil Wheaton: He's a goddamn gentleman.

That’s right, y’all.  That’s a photo that I’m posting on my blog – of Wil Wheaton signing a photo that I posted on my blog.  And I’m pretty sure this is how wormholes get started.

Worth it.


In other news, it’s Sunday, which means it’s time for the weekly wrap-up:

What you missed on my sex column (which is satirical and vaguely safe for work if your boss isn’t a complete douche-canoe):

What you missed on Good Mom/Bad Mom on the Houston Chronicle:

What you missed in my shop (tentatively called “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):

What you missed on the internets:

This week on Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:

This week’s wrap-up sponsored by my fabulously talented friends, Nees and Vos.  They’re awesome and I have nothing sarcastic to say about them.  Seriously, go listen to their new single (Burn Me Down) and if you don’t think it’s awesome I will give you a dollar.  Or kick you.  One of those.

153 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Wil Wheaton is at least 18 kinds of awesome. That is about the coolest thing I’ve ever seen. Social media FTW.

    I’ll get started checking out your other links, but wanted to comment about @wilw and tell you that I love the new music! Thank you for the link!

    Frelle recently posted Now That's Just Uncalled For.

  2. I loved every minute of this post. And I have to say, the internet post was my #1 for the week.

    Make sure, if you ever get some one on one time with WW, to get the H’s flying. Whhhil Whhheaton loves that kind of shit.

    Brandon recently posted Kill Cliff: A Sports Drink. A Recovery Drink. An Everything Drink..

  3. Everything I begin to type is just too creepy to actually post, but suffice it to say I think you are really neat and you make me laugh. That was innocent enough eh?

    Lucy recently posted ...out with the old, in with the waaaay too good for me....

  4. The most awesomest thing since giant metal chickens.

    Suebob recently posted I have a food blog where sometimes I talk about other things too.

  5. Ah! I just got sucked into a worm hole. I think you can expect me to show up at your house any minute. Or on the Enterprise. Either way, it’s AWESOME.

    Annadanna (from Canada) recently posted Time for a fresh start.

  6. Yay cool me, I knew what Dragon Con was. I clearly spend too muc time on FB.

  7. I just listened to an audio book her narrated – fantastic!

  8. He. Jeez.

  9. I have to say, I enjoy your “Shit I did when I wasn’t here” updates. Gives me a chance to catch up. And the sex-drive chart = awesome. I think I’m going print it and put it on my fridge where everyone can enjoy it. And then just randomly change a magnet over where I am on any given day.

    Cathy recently posted It’s a battle of wills.

  10. Oooh a gentleman AND a lefty.

  11. Fanfreakingtastic!!! I’ve always wanted to go to Dragon*con! i’ve been to an AnimeCon..but well it’s fantastic in another light.

    I do think you just started a wormhole..but it WAS TOTALLY worth it!

    Gypsie recently posted Officially a "Soccer Mom".

  12. Dang, I wish I could have actually gone to the convention. I did make it to the parade though. I have always been proud of my geek streak, but it was a bit eye-opening when my 8 y/o could spot more characters than I could. “Look Mom, it’s Jayne.” “How do you know?” “See all the Browncoats around him? And of course, the hat.”

    Of course. I’m not sure whether to be proud or humiliated.

  13. PS – Hailey is adorable, but you need to do a better job of teaching her curse words. You do’t want her to bottle up all that anger do you?

    PPS – I like your sex chart, but I don’t see myself on there. I’m more “Can you just it while i sleep? That would just be better for both of us.”

    Annadanna (from Canada) recently posted Time for a fresh start.

  14. I don’t know about you, but I pheel like running onto my doorstep and shouting “Curse!” phor the entire neighborhood to hear.
    And I really like that T-shirt. It is my phavorite one yet.
    Gotta go, THE F-WORD is ringing.

    Johi recently posted More Love for You and I.

  15. Really, Wil. I’m sorry to say, but your attempt to look older than 19 by growing a beard and what-not on your face isn’t going so well. You look SO YOUNG. It kinda makes me hate you a little bit but the whole “collating” thing evens it out, so you’re back at level ground with me. I know that you are relieved, yes?

    Also. Why only one L ? What happened to the second L ? Am I supposed to say your name really, really quickly? Maybe blend your name into the next word in the sentence? If I greet you, do I shout, “Hey Wilwhat’s shakin?”

    tracey recently posted Crrrruuuunch. Crrrruuuunch.*.

  16. I work in a Peds ICU. Actually I’m at work today. Is it completely inappropriate that I want to take the Sex Face Chart and put in my Attending’s office?

    Karen Hawks recently posted The Yang to My Yin.

  17. What’s that I just felt? A Wrinkle In Time?

    FoxyKate recently posted grey yoga pants, green deep-V, glasses..

  18. Wil Wheaton is more awesome than I ever could have imagined, considering every time I see his face I’m reminded of the thousand horrible ways I want to kill Wesley Crusher.

    Wow. I’m a geek. And really old.

    *Important clarification: I do know they’re different people. I’m a crazy old geek, but not *that* crazy. Y’all don’t need to come swarming to my door all concerned I’m about to hunt down Wil Wheaton, who is fifty kinds of fabulous.

    **Unless for some reason they do another Next Generation thing with Wesley Crusher, because then? IT’S ON.

    ***Good lord, I need a life.

    Jenny recently posted Milestone-o-rama.

  19. When I was twelve and under the spell of the magnificent Will Wheaton I did not know of how awesome he truly is. Jenny, you have resparked my love for this wonderfully awesome human being and I am forever grateful. I will dream of him every night and obsess about him every day. He deserves nothing less than utter devotion.

    Denise recently posted I used to love The Love Boat.

  20. I actually write fantasy, so yeah, Dragon*Con!!!!. (Maybe someday I’ll get to go …….)

    I think this is up there in the most awesome thing ever. WW rocks and so do you.

  21. Now I need a haunted dollhouse…..

  22. PS. I’ve also secretly had a crush on Wil Wheaton for like 20 years. :D

  23. I found out what DragonCon was when Crow T. Robot #2 tweeted that both he and Crow T. Robot #1 were both heading there on the same plane together, which is either the best setup for a sitcom, or a wormhole-in-the-making due to all that sarcasm in the same container. Alas, I am broke and panicky, so conventions aren’t for me, either. PHONE!

    Dawne recently posted Old school is in session.

  24. I love, love, love wil wheaton, since he is one of my future husbands, I’ll take credit for him signing that for you. :)

    Stephanie recently posted I Like To Microwave Bacon and Squirrel Rock.

  25. And I think you made Wil Wheaton’s head grow three sizes. Bloggess, if you’re going to Photoshop Wil Wheaton, at least get the proportions right, woman. His melon is ginormous.

    moooooog35 recently posted Wrapping Up the Week - September 3, 2011.

  26. How in the hell am I not following you on pinterest? My husband *really* wants to go to DragonCon, but I keep birthing things, so…..

    Cat @Breakfast to Bed recently posted Lazy Sunday..

  27. Oh Jenny, you are the first thing I encountered after coffee at 7am today and you had me laughing right away. I think my husband thinks I’ve lost my mind. ^_^ I think Hailey is adorable beyond all adorable things and I think it’s f-ing fantastic that Wil Wheaton was signing copies of the picture you posted on here. ^_^ What would make it better? If he signed a copy for YOU and sent it to you but he’d have to make it obvious that it was from him, you know? So you don’t think it’s a terrorist using your love of Wil Wheaton to blow you off the face of the Earth. I can just imagine the chaos that would ensue if something like that were to happen. An angry mob of Bloggess followers turning over every stone in the world ready to kick some guy’s ass. Its like an army you don’t have to pay for or worry about morale with. I think that’s a win-win situation for you.

  28. My husband and I both have a crush on Wil, of course for different reasons. And that makes it ok for me to stalk his blog and talk to my husband about all the geeky things he posts there.

    I had a laminated picture of Wesley in my locker AND in my purse. FTW.

  29. Wil Wheaton is all kinds of awesome.

    Courtney recently posted I don’t even like Pina coladas, but I like this song..

  30. “Shit I Did When I Wasn’t Here” Is one of my favorites!! Thanks for another great week! :)

  31. You are obviously not a Sheldon Cooper fan. You know Wil Wheaton is his arch nemesis. :)
    Seriously though, that’s cool.

    Mom in High Heels recently posted And we're moving!!!!.

  32. Nathan Fillion!!! He is my #1…he IS ruggedly handsome! :P

  33. Obviously I love Will Wheaton.

    Sherry Carr-Smith recently posted Mighty Job Hunter!.

  34. I want a signed picture of Wil Wheaton collating papers for my sins! (He *is* the Second Coming, right?) DAMMIT. Why do I have to be so terrified of hordes of people?

    Rachael recently posted Lemonade.

  35. The dog and baby goat together was great. I think I’m pinned challenged so I couldn’t comment there- but I really liked it. I requested an invite. But is there a protracted, or actually any kind of investigation before an invite is sent?

    If so, I am definitely screwed.

    Bodaciousboomer recently posted Who ever heard of a cow with an Uzi?.

  36. Totally awesome!
    And it was our anniversary yesterday. I introduced my hubby to the joys of Knock knock Motherfucker! We have yet to get our own love chicken, but that can’t be far off. Some real ones were whispering to us at at combo farm/zoo yesterday.

    Rainyday recently posted Happy Anniversary, let's go to the zoo!.

  37. You make that unhealthy crush I had on him much more legitimate.

    Stephanie recently posted Motherhood’s Getting on My Nerves.

  38. He also, in case you didn’t know, had them available for signature at the Phoenix Comicon over Memorial Day weekend this year. Yup. He did.

  39. I knew what DragonCon is and want to go some time but don’t do really well in crowds (bolted from a premiere last night because small space + large crowd = MUST FLEE).

    Wil Wheaton signing pics of him collating paper is awesome. Methinks Nathan Fillion could take lessons in awesome from Wil Wheaton (and then get us the damn picture of him holding twine, ffs)!

    Also, I love the sex chart… but I think where I am on the scale and my ability/opportunity to do anything about it are two different things. But I’ll file away your answer in case I’m ever asked “So, how’s your sex drive” because I sortve want to get written up as a case study in a medical journal at some point in my life and would rather not have it be because I contract some horrifyingly unique disease.

    MsDarkstar recently posted STRIP – The Dallas Webcomics Expo Roundup.

  40. I’m not sure if I want to be you or be your best friend. I would so totally make you less funny though. So best friend it is. When should we meet?

  41. Sadly, my favorite photo of Will Wheaton is not from this site, but from this one: http://www.hittygirls.com/celebpics2.htm. (scroll to the bottom.) Hitty dolls are popular among doll collectors, and based on the story behind the doll, they’re supposed to travel and have adventures. I’m sure he had no idea why he was posing with a doll, but he did it with style.

  42. As long as he doesn’t sign the photo of him signing the photo that he has already signed, you’re in the clear on that wormhole thing. However, the fact that you were essentialy at the conference without being there, high wormhole propensity, beware.

    JJ @ 84th&3rd recently posted Pancake Face.

  43. 44
    Apryl's Antics

    I actually live in the town where Dragon Con is happening and I am sooooo tempted to print this out and take it to Will Wheaton and have him sign it. Then you can post a Will Wheaton signed picture of Will Wheaton signing a picture of Will Wheaton collating paper.

  44. It looks like the creepy doll that lives in your haunted house is having a tawdry affair with Captain America and her forgot his suit. That or she sprinkled some sort of dust on him and he shriveled up into nothing leaving only his empty costume. Probably that latter one, actually.

  45. I have to say that, while I enjoyed Will Wheaton’s work over the years, I didn’t know anything about him until reading about the whole collating paper thing. Then I went to his blog. Pretty awesome guy. And he continues to prove it! TOTALLY get your thrill!

  46. I can definitely relate to that first sentence, especially if you were to replace “the throngs of people that would surely bring on massive panic attacks” with “the snarling, gridlocked mess that is Atlanta traffic on an event weekend that would surely bring on a massive homicidal rage”. I really wanted to go this year, but I couldn’t come up with the scratch for a costume OR for tickets, but I’m totally going next year. Especially since now I have one more stop to add to my autograph list!

    If I have a former Star Trek star sign an autograph for me while dressed as a character from the Star Wars expanded universe (Mara Jade, bitches!) am I also at risk of opening a wormhole? Ah, fuck it. Totally worth it.

    Don't Poke the Crazy recently posted Win: Weapon of Choice.

  47. I can’t hear the name or see the face of Wil Wheaton without seeing every Big Bang Theory that he’s been on and how mean he is to Sheldon all the time. LOL.

    Joe recently posted Sleep Escapes Me.

  48. Sigh…
    I always had a huge crush on him.
    Now I’m jealous.

    Allyn recently posted Foodie Friday: Chili.

  49. The first thing I noticed too was that Wil is a lefty. Awesome. We’re practically brothers now.

    And can’t stop laughing at ‘but we really have to work on your spelling..’

  50. First let me congratulate you on your pioneering work with wormholes. Second, I have heard of Comic Con which I actually considered attending back when I used to be cool, despite a high probability that it would have caused a panic attack. And Third, I don’t think Will’s beard is overly complicated…is there something I’m missing?

    btw, I’m a huge fan and possibly somewhat of a kindred spirit as I have a 40-something year old vibrating stuffed suirrel that I only handle with rubber gloves ever since my 2 year old dropped it in the toilet….nothing says “I love your work” like over-sharing.

    BlogAn recently posted Salmonella Chicken Juice Hands.

  51. Um, so I have no idea what Comic.Con is. But I now love WW. Seriously, he’s about the coolest thing since, to quote a previous commenter, Beyonce the big metal chicken. Really, why hasn’t Beyone (person) agreed to take a picture with Beyonce (chicken)… Probably because she’s not nearly as cool as WW.

    Becky recently posted I'm no weeks and I'm craving nothing..

  52. I’m having a hurts to move day because my left shoulder HATES me, so I’m highly medicated. There’s something about Wil Wheaton signing pictures that makes me smile that has nothing to do with medication. What does that say about me that I know what DragonCon is and have friends who love to go to it every year and that I would really love go sometime in the future? :-)

  53. I’m SO glad someone got down there to do that because I was ENTIRELY too ill to do so– D*C is SO MUCH AWESOMENESS!!

    Meg recently posted Bathroom stalls….

  54. I have to say that I liked the Hailey conversation. That was just cute.

    My other favorites are the Pinterest and So you’re mad on the internet. I equate this with having road rage.

    Lilscorpiosweet recently posted Leggo My Eggo (Fantasy).

  55. A Wil Wheaton worm hole is the best kind there could possibly be.

    Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted 16 Things I Said This Week.

  56. A few years ago I went to A-KON…and totally got made fun of by P. N. Elrod for blushing as she talked about writing sex scenes with Nigel Bennett. (Forever Knight was my favorite show when I was in junior high…and incidentally I married a cop who works the night shift). It was one of the most amazing/humiliating moments of my little life….second only to putting Wallace Shawn on hold and having to say “Inconceivable” 5 times before I could talk to him and take his message.

  57. Wil is teh awesome. And I love that it made you furiously happy. It made me furiously happy to see you furiously happy.

    In fact, each and everyone of your blogs and articles make me laugh (and sometimes cry, but mostly laugh. Oh, and cringe, too). As thanks, I am going to do something that will make me furiously happy next weekend, and I hope the end result will make you furiously happier.

    MaryC recently posted Happy Birthday, AnnPW!.

  58. Dangit! That’s what I get for trying to keep a surprise!

    I actually got you a copy of Wil’s signature on that very same photo at PAX (Penny Arcade Expo – gaming convention) last weekend, but then I went out of town on vacation the day after and was hit by a super nasty cold which I still have and so I haven’t been able to get to the post office to send it off. Easy come easy go, I didn’t even have to stand in line for very long to get it, somehow I saw his tweet saying he was going to be signing things like 5 min after it was posted and I ended up being 7th in line.

    Vado Banane recently posted Survival of the Fittest Isn't Working....

  59. Because of you, I sorta kinda think Wil Wheaton is okay. Never liked him until he sent you the photo of him collating. He has a sense of humor, so he’s now off the list of asshole celebrities I’d like to harpoon, and on the list of celebrities I’ll let live. He owes you one.

    Barbara recently posted The Bloggess is Not a Douche-Canoe.

  60. Jenny, you are my hero. I think I might hang a shrine on my wall to you. That wouldn’t be creepy, would it?

    Also, Wil Wheaton is probably the best celebrity ever. And by probably, I mean he absolutely is.

    Amber Deschamps recently posted You are a flesh puppet, therefore your uterus could be a steak. But only if you’re a woman. Also, I’m drunk..

  61. Ahhh, that adorable Will Wheaton…..

    Dana recently posted Long Day, I Still Have The Eye of a Prize Fighter....

  62. The Craigslist thing is so funny- had to re-post on FB.

    Also, not to harp on this you guys, but Copernicus The Homicidal Monkey is on Twitter and seems to not have been found by many of his friends and/or victims. It’s the real him, tweet at him and ask him. He’ll tell you to get your affairs in order or something more violent that hopefully won’t involve him throwing his own feces:


    GirltoMom- Heidi recently posted The “P” Word.

  63. Love the tail-chasing concept of Wil Wheaton signing that photo.

    Do have to point out, however, on your sex drive chart, that your [sic] spelling “occassionally” wrong…

    Made up for it, however, with the linke to “Captain Planet, Muthahfu**er!”

  64. HAWT

    Aimee Giese | Greeblemonkey recently posted Gimme The Gig : Bop Skizzum.

  65. I realize after I read your ” Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome links, I end up re-posting at least 90% of them.. Perhaps I should just start re-posting your posts and save myself some time.
    Also I just “posts” a LOT.

    Jessica @ Stylish Stealthy and Healthy recently posted Reeoowwr.

  66. Squeee! Now you can die happy. Not that we want you to die, though you will in the far, far future, but if, say an angry mob swept you into the path of something seriously deadly or you were sucked into a wormhole, we could say “She died complete.” But it would still suck.
    On the bright side, your connection to Wil Wheaton is growing stronger. . .
    It’s just a matter of time.

  67. I feel a Wheaton-based Physics word problem percolating….

    Dragon*Con is just the best. It’s been a few years since I last went, but it’s worth some of the minor headaches to spend a weekend with people who are as geeky as I am.

  68. I don’t if you’ve heard of Motorhead or The Queen – Freddie Mercury et al. – but this might be interesting:


    Have you ever listened to hard rock in the sauna – or contemplated the essence of Bohemian Rhapsody in a small rusted out VW?

  69. I can’t look at Wil Wheaton anymore without being really pissed about what he did to poor Sheldon on The Big Bang Theory. (I’m the kind of girl who thinks geeks are totally hot but only know about things like Wil Wheaton and Dragon*Con because I think geeks are totally hot. Beyond that, having never seen an episode of Star Trek and falling asleep every single time my husband has tried to make me sit through Star Wars, I’m clueless.)



    I totally forgot where I was going with this.


    Dani recently posted The Bargain Nazi.

  70. I had the awesome idea to go to FurCon, but the rules are restrictive. You’d think furries wouldn’t be so judgmental. Turns out they’re dicks. Dicks dressed like cocks.

    Sarah P recently posted For the elegant southern lady.

  71. Yes, he is a fine, fine man. I follow him on Twitter because of you. He should have sent you the picture on his own though because that would have made him the ultimate.

    Headless Mom recently posted Bank Account.

  72. In the words of Stewie Griffin, “Whhhhhil…Whhhhheaton!” Your (damn, I really want to type “You’re”) post made my Sunday morning. My hubby has a man-crush on Wil Wheaton. The hubby has read all of Will’s books and follows Will (like a lost puppy) on Twitter. I was so excited to tell the hubby that a blog I read talks about Will Wheaton too! The hubby was not as impressed. I guess second hand Will it’s good enough for him. Oh, and we go to Comic-Con every year. I was pushing a stroller around Comic-Con, before it was cool to take your kids to Comic-Con. So, I guess I’m part of the 10% crowd. Thanks, from a new reader.

  73. Of course I know what Dragon*Con is!
    ANyway, a Nathan Fillion question. What’s the proper pronunciation of his last name? Anybody? I always thought it was FILL-iun, but my stepson says filly-ON. Personally, I think filly-ON sounds pretentious. If that’s the way it’s pronounced, no wonder he won’t pose with twine. Too pedestrian. See if he’ll go for posing with…I don’t know, gold thread or something. Is there a rooptetoo twine sold only at specialty shops with limited hours? Maybe that would work.

  74. Damn, I got lost in the books-a-minute for an hour (that’s like 60 books, right!?!) So thanks for that and for sharing your adorable mother-daughter conversations. BTW, have you and Wil ever met? I’d pay just to witness the AWEsomeness of y’all in the same space:)

  75. @Dani That was a fictional Wil Wheaton on the Big Bang Theory. In real life, I don’t believe Wil Wheaton is like that.
    @Joules Wil Wheaton is the Secretary of Geek Affairs.

    @Sarah P Check out Anthrocon (http://www.anthrocon.org/). I don’t know how Furcon compares so you’ll have to look at Anthrocon’s policies for yourself.

    I’ve wanted to go to Dragon*Con for a few years now. I don’t have social anxiety disorder but I don’t like to go to things like this by myself so I have to get friends or my husband to go with me. (While my husband and I go to many cons together, I’m not sure he’d want to go to Dragon*Con except because he loves me and knows I want to go.) I do have one friend with social anxiety disorder and she has been getting better but I know she has limits and takes care of herself within her parameters. I have other friends who simply would not want to deal with that many people. I find that having access to the “big names” for me out weighs the press of humanity. I did have a minor panic attack once when I was at the Rally for Sanity/Fear in Washington, D.C. . I doubt my husband actually noticed but I had to take some deep breaths and practice some calming techniques to deal with it. I don’t have your experience but I do have a small understanding of what you deal with and you seem to deal with it pretty well.

    adelheid_p recently posted Silliness.

  76. OK, I officially am even more impressed by you. Not only are you about the only blogger that can actually make me laugh out loud, I find it heartwarming that you want to go to DragonCon. It used to always land on the same weekend as Worldcon, so I’d have to miss it. I have been wanting to make it to DragonCon and Comic-Con for years and something always gets in the way.

  77. This is awesome. But, it would have been super awesome if he had been signing the picture of himself collating paper while hugging orphans and rescuing puppies.

    Momma Teacher Lady recently posted Best McDonald's Drive-Thru Experience. Ever..

  78. Is that a phoenix/Fawkes in your haunted dollhouse? I love it. So creepily miniature.

  79. I swear, the universe just loves you. This kind of cool crap only happens to you!

    Rebel Chick Jenn recently posted Make Money With Your iPhone With We Rewards!.

  80. Awesome haunted dollhouse!!!! Makes me want to build one myself. Would love to shrink down and explore all the rooms like in the book “the sixty-eight rooms” by Marianne Malone

  81. My boyfriend is at Dragon*Con without me (stupid work) ogling boobs right now! He has all the fun. I wish I were there with you (because we’re best friends. Well, you and me and Paula Deen and the Pioneer Woman, and no, they don’t know it either. Y’all really need to get with the program.). We could drink a bunch of tequila or rum, and then we wouldn’t get panic attacks and could wear tiny hats and make fun of beards (facial hair, not ladies).
    Please don’t take out an internet restraining order. I’m harmless, I swear.

  82. Check your email, duckie!

    tokenblogger recently posted So we had these….

  83. This is normally where I would spill my fantasy of WilW kissing me softly on the lips while he’s wearing the Star Trek uniform, but I won’t. Oh I just did.

    Love the updates!

    Angie recently posted Saying What You Mean.

  84. Book A Minute was fun. I also enjoy: http://betterbooktitles.com/

  85. Oh wow. I think I might be in love with Wil Wheaton. Lol.

    Janey recently posted Nevermind, I'll Find Someone Like You (or so the song says).

  86. in alternative universe, you two made beautiful twine twin babies named nathan and nathenette.

    jighugs, k

    Kirsten (results not typical girl) recently posted i’m sexy anyway.

  87. I’m at Dragon*Con and got Wil Wheaton to autograph one of the photos of him collating paper on Saturday. My brother was behind me in line and got the LAST one! Wil said that he bought 200 and gave our way more than he anticipated. I’ll and you the picture as soon as I get home and can upload it.

    Btw, Wil is incredibly nice and very personable. He loves you!

  88. Correction. Wormholes were started by lonely worms. Trust me on this.

    hogsatemysister recently posted In your mid-50s? Your Plumbing Leaks.

  89. Well, good, a wormhole would be quite useful to me because I have no way to get home. Have Will ask me for coordinates for the other end. And the date. It wouldn’t be useful to get home at the wrong time.

    Mikeporterinmd recently posted Monopoly Is Only Fun With Certain Rules.

  90. Dragon*Con is fewer than 3 miles from my house. Now you’re REALLY wishing you were there, right?

    the muskrat recently posted how she’s fared since coming out of the closet.

  91. I am so incredibly jealous! I know you’ll probably think it’s because of Wil Wheaton signing that photo…and that’s really great and all…but I’m actually jealous of your haunted dollhouse! I already have plans to buy one but I didn’t know you could make them haunted. Brilliant!

    jacqui recently posted Promises, Promises….

  92. Ah, Jenny, this post is full of awesomesauce. First Wil Wheaton, then great stuff you’ve been doing. I love your pinterest board. Where do you find that stuff? Then the things from the internet? How do you have time to comb Craig’s list to find quirky items for sale? It must be the insomnia (I almost typed “amnesia”). Finally, while I do know what Dragon*Con is, I am not a sci-fi geek, so I don’t follow “The Guild.” Was that Nathan Fillion who cameoed (?? is that a word??) in it? Anyway, this was great.

    P.S. I couldn’t find myself on the sex chart. I think I must be -5 or something.

  93. Oh, Wesley! Still love you!

    Mary recently posted What Wine Makes Possible.

  94. Just saw this today… Thought you might enjoy it. lol http://nickholmes.tumblr.com/post/8227305577/opportunity-not-missed

  95. Well, to be honest, what else does Wil Wheaton (where the hell’s the other “L”???) got going on but to sign photos? I mean, besides that TV show he’s on and all?

  96. I heart Wil Wheaton almost as much as I heart you. Sigh.

    beth recently posted Drunken Chicken = Baseball Luck Charm.

  97. The Guild makes me #furiouslyhappy until the end of the episode; then I become sadface. It sucks because the episodes are so short, so I’m all :D :(

    HNtG recently posted I Got Paid for His Arrest.

  98. The Wil Wheaton stuff…FUCKING FABULOUS! Love, love, love it!

  99. I thought the sex chart was the funniest thing I’ve read all week until I got to the ‘Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome’ chart about arguing on the internet. I have now permanently added ‘dickfinity’ to my repertoire, and yes, that makes me incredibly happy.

    Vesta Vayne recently posted Gin + Antioxidants = Not as bad as just Gin.

  100. I’m posting this comment from DragonCon. And I totally missed Wil Wheaton, but have heard of his awesome. Felicia Day is smaller in person than on the Internet. And Jen from Cake Wrecks is here. You could totally revel in anonymity here. There are 5 hotels worth of bathrooms to hide in.

  101. Yep cool..I searched for the Dragon Con on FB…Got nothing…

  102. A story inspired by you and Shakespeare.Hope you enjoy!
    Barry the Psychedelic Platypus
    Once-upon-a-time there was a pyschedelic platypus named Barry, who lived on the Sun with his father and mother who were the same person.Although it is impossible to live on the sun without having your DNA melted, Barry was basically the Psychedelic Messiah and so he could walk on drugs.Plus Barry didn’t have much DNA left after years of taking hallucinogens.Anyway Barry and his pateroma had a great time living on the Sun and lived happily ever after.

    Until 3 years later when Barry realized he wasn’t the Psychedelic Messiah and had his DNA melted.But it didn’t matter because Barry didn’t have any brain cells left and therefore was not a conscious being.As for his parent[s], he/she was much too wise to get melted by Sun exposure and realized that he was just a story-aid for a good-looking schoolboy who couldn’t think of anything appropriate for his school.And so his reality faded into nothingness, just like the worth of your life did when you were born.
    I am now going to enter this into the Young Writers Awards, although my mind is split in two over whether i should change it to binary code first.


  103. When I get FURIOUSLY HAPPY, sometimes I make a mess on myself.

    Rai recently posted awkward introductions.

  104. By the way the end sentence is not aimed at you but at all the people who read it.So that’s YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU! But only if you actually read it.

  105. by the way again the url is not mine it’s just an awesome website

  106. Wil Wheaton totally rocks – I’ve had a crush on him since the movie “Stand by Me”.

    Cheryl @ Coffee with Cheryl recently posted “What are you doing?”.

  107. I completely understand what you mean about your heart growing three sizes; I had that happen to me recently when a certain bloggess replied to one of my tweets and then followed me! I just sat there in my office saying “Jenny” in my best Forrest Gump voice. The teacher I share the office with was a little concerned until I showed her the Copernicus post then she totally understood. The groundsman who wandered in during this didn’t and backed out slowly. He speaks to me in a kind, quiet voice now.

  108. Wil posted a great piece about how he would like to refrain from too much contact at his next convention, to prevent getting sick (which apparently has happened to him before).
    It’s a very good mea culpa, and with the signing the Collating pic just makes him even awesome-er!

    ElGuapo recently posted Stop the Insanity! (Madness, Part 2) (Coachella 2008).

  109. One of these days you will pick something I wrote for Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome and I will tweet about it for the rest of my life.
    I’m not a stalker. Just don’t look out your window.

  110. I happen to have two worms. Yet, no wormholes yet.


    EdT. recently posted Tolerance Two Ways.

  111. I <3 you. Thanks for the giggles. The Book-a-Minute Crucible is my fave.

    "Everybody gets hanged, which just goes to show how evil McCarthyism is."


  112. Bahahaha yesssss!

    Tazer WP recently posted Open letters about more shit.

  113. I think my brain exploded from the awesome.

    Beesus recently posted Cooking With Beesus: Tormado!.

  114. You’re messing with serious forces here. Awesome!

    Kelly O'Sullivan recently posted Judge Me By the Size of My…Tear Ducts?.

  115. I find the new hip Dragon Con a bit disorienting. I remember the early days when we knew just about everyone in the small crowd and drank for free because we were young and cute.

    I still find WW made of awesome. He and River Phoenix were the Yin and Yang of my first crush in Stand By Me.

    MistressofNone recently posted Take Two.

  116. My neighbor and her family just got back from the weekend. My son’s cross country coach didn’t take them to a meet this weekend saying it was Labor Day weekend and folks would be out of town..then he headed to Dragon Con. I never have ventured. But last comment I left on this said I leave the party when things start drifting weird. Maybe should head down there next Labor Day?

  117. He was so freaking charming on his panels this weekend, and that photo blows my mind.

    Bad Influence Speaks recently posted White Collar: On the Fence.

  118. Have you checked Will Wheatons’ Blog? because if he has posted a link from this blog, of him signing photos on your blog, on his blog, well the Universe might be in imminent danger of collapse

  119. I was there!! I saw Wil Wheaton twice and I have a picture of us together and he’s wearing that shirt. It was a crazy few days, but I can’t stand to miss DragonCon. I couldn’t believe how crowded it was this year, though. It was tough to maneuver some of the crowds, but I saw Wil Wheaton and talked to Brent Spiner and had a great time costume watching.

    However, and I hate to be the downer of the bunch here, but Wil Wheaton wasn’t really that nice to me. I guess he’s not required by law to be, and he did everything he was supposed to do- autograph, take pictures with people and speak at a few panels, but I got a really rude vibe from him every time I was around him. He was great on the panels, but I don’t know. I may have to rethink my Wil Wheaton fixation.

    LS recently posted Rules for Writing.

  120. LS, just so you’re not alone…I was like 7th in line to meet Wil last week at PAX on the first day of the con but you would never be able to tell that by his expression, he looked annoyed to have been asked for the photo both when I did it and when the picture was taken. I just told myself that really, there has to be SOME truth to the cocky attitude guy that his characters always are these days and with his history is it really that unexpected?

    Vado Banane recently posted Survival of the Fittest Isn't Working....

  121. Wil Wheaton is a King among men, and I’m beginning to think Nathan Fillion is an asshole. I mean he could be at a nerd convention tying up pictures of himself holding twin sexily.

    John B recently posted the terminal: where class goes to die.

  122. Wil Wheaton is a Greek God. he can Stand By Me anytime.


    Julie recently posted Household chores to avoid during pregnancy..

  123. This post was all kinds of awesome! I haven’t watched the Guild in forever and the flow chart about arguing on the internet- I seen it on a mothering forum I am a member of a few months back. It is quite fitting.

    Katie Bennett recently posted The goldfish will eat you in your sleep….

  124. Wil Wheaton is now your stalker

    Abby recently posted Say My Name, Say My Name.

  125. Wil Wheaton was all kinds of awesome at Dragon*Con this weekend. So So happy I got a chance to see him, one of the highlights of my trip!

    Kristin recently posted Smaller is Better.

  126. I was there! My boyfriend is on staff with with DCTV. If you haven’t seen their YouTube Page, I highly recommend it. HILARIOUS. I saw WW speak at a couple of panels and OMG, he is awesome and hilarious. I hope you make it out to the Con one day… its really worth it!

  127. I was kind of waivering on Wil Wheaton because it was fucking awesome of him to collate paper and send you a picture. Fucking. Awesome.

    BUT, the only thing I’ve ever seen him in (don’t stone me!) is the episode of “Criminal Minds” where he’s a psychopathic inn keeper who rapes and murders people after delivering the favorite breakfast treat they happened to mention the night before when they were supposedly alone in their rooms and absolutely did NOT call the front desk to order. Also, he steals their panties and wears a lot of plaid.

    My point is he was really, REALLY convincing and that’s what I think of when I thing of Wil Wheaton. Or it was until this post because no torturous, banana-pancake-making murderer would do something as awesome as signing the picture of himself collating paper for you at Dragon*Con!

    Wil Wheaton, you can kill me with collated awesomeness anytime!

    SisterMerryHellish recently posted The Secret Life Of Guitar Playing Sheep.

  128. As a hockey fan, a Star Trek: TNG fan, and a fan of yours I could not let this pass by without passing it along:

  129. On the beards thing… I don’t have a photo, but Eddie McClintock has a beard right now, and he had a little sign drawn in sharpie on plain printer paper that was a face with a beard and it said “the beard is not by choice, please be kind” and then in smaller letters underneath “also I am not David Boreanaz”. Also he was really sweet. Didn’t make it to see WW because his lines were always so fucking LONG.

  130. Wil Wheaton absolutely refused to pose for pictures with my cheap plastic lobsters. And by “absolutely refused” I mean “probably has no idea I and/or the lobsters even exist” …which is just as bad, really.

    Steve recently posted #301 Crabby.

  131. Vado Banane – I’m so glad to know that I’m not alone. It was kind of disappointing, but maybe it’s an actor thing? Being adored by so many has to have an effect on you at some point. I’m sure it would on me if I were in that position. I’d like to think that I’d be a little less annoyed to have fans, though.

    LS recently posted Rules for Writing.

  132. I have to admit… I have watched the guild for…well…forever. And until I started a twitter account a week or so ago and started following Wil Wheaton I had no clue he was Wesley Crusher from Star Trek. How could I NOT know this???

    Sheila recently posted Epic Hissy Fit.

  133. I have been going to Dragon*Con for 10 years. Wait, no, 11. Wait, 10. It’s hard to remember because I skipped a year and I’m bad at math. And by “math” I mean “the kind of addition that might baffle a Kindergartener but would be regarded with contempt by a third-grader.”


    I’m a D*C track director (I run the Anne McCaffrey fan track) and that means I don’t have time to see a lot of stuff while I’m at the convention. I have to plan extra-hard to do the cool stuff I DO want to do and get the autographs I want.

    This was my order of priorities this year:

    Michael Whelan = Felicia Day = Wil Wheaton > Amy Okuda & Robin Thorsen (they’re a matching set) > Carrie Fisher.

    Yes, I put Princess freaking Leia LAST in the list. Whelan, Day, and Wheaton were all Priority 1. I managed to obtain signage from everyone except Carrie Fisher, and where I’m going with this is that of all of those people, Wil Wheaton helped me have one of the most memorable experiences of any Dragon*Con I have ever been to ever, SO much so that I seriously was not THAT disappointed I didn’t have time to get Carrie Fisher to sign my officially licensed Star Wars Adidas, Slave Leia edition sneakers.

    Wil Wheaton declared me the winner of Dragon*Con Idol, which is something we completely made up and involved no singing or performing on my part, but whatever, I won it, I have witnesses. And he air-fived me. I will tell the full story to ANYONE who asks. I will tell it 50 times. It is an awesome story.

    Dragon*Con is the best and you jerks had all better be there next year.

    Charlotte Moore recently posted cavaticat: @kelRAWRsaur In other news, this morning someone else got up, went for a walk and lost 10 dollars. #perspective #killjoy.

  134. I finally found Nathan Fillion and string! He was hiding in 2009 so no wonder it’s been hard to find him.


  135. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for the Captain Planet link. It just made my day…tree bitches.

    Karen Hawks recently posted Save Water, Bathe With Someone You?.

  136. OMG, Wil Wheaton. Toy Soldiers for LIFE!

    Kate recently posted Get off the Bedtime Express.

  137. We just unearthed a stack of old StarTrek Fan club magazines from the 80s and 90s and found one w/ the young Wil Wheaton on the cover. I think there are even some articles with him inside. I could send it to you if you’re intersted (totally free). We’re just trying to get rid of them.

  138. On our way back from Dragon*Con, one of my friends checked the Twitter #DragonCon tag, and Will Wheaton has one of the best quotes. It’s become a tag line, even if it is rather profane.

    Carole, if you want to be sure of how to pronounce Fillion, just listen to The Signal Podcast. (It’s FILL-yun)

  139. AHH awesome! My husband and I drove down to visit his mom, who lives about an hour past Atlanta. We had no idea at the time that Atlanta was hosting like 5000 events that weekend, or that Dragon*Con was there. After seeing the news coverage and some TV special about it, I so desperately want to go some day. Unfortunately my husband does not so much want to go with me!

    Erin recently posted Knocked Up – 12w5d.

  140. No judging! I love your haunted dollhouse. I was recently pinning teeny tiny 1/12th size things, and my boyfriend asked what I was looking at. I admitted for the first time (to anyone) that I wanted to build/design/decorate a dollhouse. He said that sounded really neat, and I instantly started bawling my eyes out. I’d figured people would think it was “weird and creepy.”

  141. I know what D*Con is! My husband goes every year and I’ve been twice (damn kids that I have to stay home for.) This year he met Stan Lee. He was over the moon! My geek/nerd of a husband also does the costuming crap (I just go to get 4 days away from children.)

    Amy Lee recently posted WOW! Another awesome giveaway from Sugar Belle!.

  142. Omg! I was at Dragon*Con and it was my first time. It was so awesome! I was especially impressed with the celebs that ventured out into the crowd. One night my friend and I were trolling the Marriott in search of the freakiest costume when all of a sudden someone shouts “OH MY GOD IT’S INSPECTOR GADGET!” I look up and say to my friend “Why is Wil Wheaton screaming about Inspector Gadget?” It was so awesome to see Wil all geeked out about the convention! I even snapped his picture with Inspector Gadget!

  143. I’m curious: would you say that DragonCon is bigger than WorldCon? I always thought WorldCon was the biggest sci-fi con in the world, but I’m willing to change my mind.

    Also, have you looked at Cynthia von Buhler’s kickstarter video, Speakeasy Dollhouse? I think it’s right up your alley. http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/183801348/speakeasy-dollhouse?ref=live

  144. Just wanted to let you know that whenever I can’t find anything interesting to read on the internets I just go to your photo of Wil Wheaton collating paper and enjoy the smile on his face. No one collages like Wil.

  145. Nathan Fillion on the Guild=genuis. I AM SO FREAKING HAPPY NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sigh……Nathan Fillion shows up in my dreams all the time.

  146. Okay, you are funny. I’m sure you hear that a lot but I’m telling you again. Up WAY past my Mommy bedtime, ugly snort laughing at everything you’ve posted for the last century.

  147. Did you know that when you mouse over Copernicus on your store’s site, that he gets bigger and MOVES independently of the laws of nature. Scared the living shit out of me seeing him move around like that!

  148. I just tried to access your “My psychiatrist hates me” because reading a sex column in the middle of the day feels a little naughty and I like it. HOWEVER, I am at Panera – and your sex site is blocked. Apparently – Panera = Douche-Canoe. So disappointing.

    Thank you for the ab workout I get from hysterical laughter every time I read your posts. Thank you also for continually adding to my vocabulary.


  149. You’ve just catapulted W.W. into a whole new level of cool. I’m too old now to watch those old TNG Star Trek reruns because he was just a kid and that would just be…. wrong somehow. So just keep posting updates of him collating. Ooooh that sounds almost dirty!

  150. @Gaidig – Thanks!

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