Last week Victor said the best place to mug someone would be right when they walk out of a movie theater because they’d be all squinty from the sunlight and I said that I’d totally be a better mugger because I’d rob people at the Fair and he was all “This isn’t a contest. I’m not actually going to mug people” but I think he just said that because he knew I’d win because A) people always have lots of cash at the fair for the rides and B) because I’d exchange half their money for ride tickets and explain that they would have just blown the rest on fattening funnel cakes anyway so technically I’m doing them a favor. Plus people are happy at the fair and happy people are less likely to stab you. Then Victor got all quiet for a few minutes because he knew he’d been beaten and then suddenly he was all, “Fine. I’d mug people at church” and I was like “You can’t mug people at church, asshole. It’s sacred ground” and then he pointed that I’d confused Highlander with real life again and so technically he won the argument because there’s really no way to come back from that, even though the fair is totally the way to go for robbing. Then several days later Victor was singing “Betty Davis Eyes” but instead of singing “All the boys think she’s a spy” he sang it “All the boys think she’s a spaz” and insisted those were the real words, and I wanted to take that moment and apply it to the argument about who’s-a-better-mugger but I couldn’t because real life doesn’t work that way even though it totally should.
PS. On an unrelated note, Black Hockey Jesus interviews me about how I’d feel being Mexican. A summary in case you don’t want to read the interview: Fine. I’d feel fine.
Comment of the day: Forever my dad thought the lyrics to “Oh What a Feeling” by Irene Cara from the movie Flashdance were “Take your pants off” instead of “Take your passion” Dad’s version beat the shit out of the real version. ~ furiousball