UPDATED: And then the PR guy called me “a fucking bitch”. I can’t even make this shit up.

C’mon, angry-villager is fun! Plus, I sell pitchforks.

Jose needs to learn the power of a simple “Sorry”, and stop qualifying the fuck out of an apology.
DogsOnDrugs.com recently posted..Goodbye

Hot damn I love me some rough hausin’!
C.J. recently posted..What I was Doing When Steve Jobs Died.

You totally win for your spelling of Kardashians. Putting in an unneeded apostrophe, like in the original pitch to you, is my pet peeve of the week’s.
Kristine recently posted..Strong Start Day: Postpartum Depression Occurs in Baby Loss Moms, too

Can we send Jose a “You are the Best Kind of Fucked Up?” Maybe it will help remove the stick up his ass.
Kelly recently posted..Mac and Cheese

I’m just glad I’m not relevant. I hope him insulting strangers he’s never met for not doing his job for him count as his asshole deed for the year, sheesh!
Mrs. Mustache recently posted..How Do I Get A Shunning Revoked?

I’m not sure how you started “the cursing game” here. Very odd. Please keep us updated on what the boss has to say.

I have to say that *I* would be flattered to get a PR pitch from anyone, but you have standards and are clearly very awesome. You go, Jenny!
Brenna recently posted..The best thing I’ve heard so far today…

I’m sorry I called you a fucking bitch, but here’s why you deserved it. No, Jose, that’s actually NOT an apology.
Erin recently posted..In A Year

Could we go angry villager on Jose? It’s been a long time since I pitchforked someone deserving!

Bless his heart.
Not_Supermom recently posted..What To Do?

Internets, meet Jose. Jose, meet the Internets.

Do not make the Internets angry.

You would not like us when we’re angry.
Desertbell recently posted..Bullying the Gamer Girl

They send out grammatically incorrect nonsense pitches, and YOU’RE the fucking bitch?

Honestly, I don’t get their tactics at all. You being a mother is just part of your blog, which means they just have crawlbots picking up “like MOTHER Teresa, only better” and the link to “Good MOM/Bad MOM” and somehow decided this was a mommy blog. Furthermore, what do the Kardashians have to do with mothers, anyway? And how did you “start the cursing game” by sending your Wil picture?

This guy is just pissed because he finally got caught using his office email to badmouth people, probably even his coworkers. He doesn’t understand blogging or women and thinks that we’re all aspiring to have Goodyear boobs. Then some “fucking bitch” who gave Christmas to those that had none and inspired others to do the same DARED to step out of the kitchen and question him. What a great PR guy – for douchebags.

Good Lord, there were no comments when I started my tirade. I should learn to rant faster. Sorry.

If I could have figured out a way to reply to your tweet via my phone I would have called that guy a “twat” right to his Twitter account.

What a total moron.
loudlyshy recently posted..Sometimes I Do it to Entertain Myself

So. Freaking. Awesome. I get both mad AND scared at those spammy emails. I hate getting junk in my box… Wait.

Tweeting this post!
Jennifer recently posted..“Push Present” – 40 Days of Fabulous Giveaway

Wow, what a horribly unprofessional person. When you make a terrible mistake like that. all you is apologize. Nothing else.

“Please stand by for a demonstration of relevancy.”

If he’d had any clue who you were, his heart would have stopped right there.
Julie recently posted..Give them an inch and they’ll take a mile

All I can say is I *heart* you and I want to be you when I grow up!

I am disappointed that you didn’t use this opportunity to say “no way jose” even once.
Deidre recently posted..Garden pickings

Just a few thoughts.

1. Dude needs a copy editor. Seriously.
2. That’s like saying “oh, you’re mad that I got my man juice on your shirt? you should be flattered I find you attractive enough to rub up against at all!”

Say whatttttt? Also, I look forward to reading more on your views of “journalists business”
Molly recently posted..funny people

I think Jose is just mad because he got sand in his vagina.

Hugs and best of luck to you in your job search, Jose!
Lori recently posted..Steve Jobs: A Legend

Jenny, you are the most amazing person I “know” and it makes me wish I REALLY did “know” you in real life. And even though we’ve never personally met, I love you and you make my days brighter. Love, a fellow Texan

I’d just like to say that Dogsondrugs provide an inferior brand of pitchfork. Buy from Honest Mike’s – “worlds sharpest tines – mega pitchforks”. As used by all of the Kardahsians and all other races in the Star Trek universe while wearing pantyhose. Get in quick. Our Taiwanese slave workers can only put out 200,000 per day….

Jose is a moron. And should probably consider another line of work…

a-ma-zing
leslie (crookedstamper) recently posted..HYCCT – A Sketch

Raise your hand if you think Jose was either fired or demoted today….

Um, I guess I’m stuck on why you would ever send an email to coworkers with the term “fucking bitch” in it…? Am I living under a rock? Maybe Jose also dabbles in dog breeding?

I flipping loved this, snark on sister!

Wow!! Jose has amazing people skills….if making people want to stab him through an email can be considered a skill!

Someone needs a prozac pinata…..
Rea recently posted.."BAM in the cup yo!"

I think the fact that Jose fail at PR. Is enough to stop us from going all mob on the company. I mean really the guy works for in PR send out an email to a blogger where he insults her and doesn’t automatically apologize?!?! He didn’t see this coming? Also the fact that he hit reply all, who is he sending this to in first place?

Wow, I love how companies act like dicks and don’t think that there will be repurcussions (sp). Jose is the company. Companies should know better. Unless they are all assholes.
rita recently posted..Boob Tube-NSFW

I worked in PR for many years and not even once internally, did I or my coworkers EVER called anyone who turned down our pitch, as a fucking bitch. Just.move.on. Jose clearly has a stick in his ass. Dickwads like him are exactly why so many good PR firms and practitioners are misunderstood.

Women should run PR, period.
Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..Lessons From My Childhood

How did you start the cursing game? I found Will Wheaton hilarious. It was/is a nice approach.

Jose needs to understand that being a drama queen may get you a following on Twitter, but will get you fired in a heart beat.
Carrie recently posted..Scarlett Scott Talks Soul Mates

Anyone who can read and can receive your Wil Wheaton Collating email and not end up laughing hysterically with tears running down their face is a sociopath and should not be pursuing a career that involves the written word.

Cheezits. You can NOT convince me the economy is in the shitter when tools like Jose have jobs. Come ON! Speaking of fucking bitches, they never tried to solicit ME! WTF JOSE?! When your wrong, your wrong!
Teresa recently posted..I’ve Been on a Mission to Find Myself. It’s Ongoing…

There needs to be a hashtag on that Twitter backlash. I suggest #BloggessWinsAtPR.
Virginia recently posted..Just Be Enough: I know I have to

Sometimes you can judge the quality of a person’s character, by the type of person who judges them to be a fucking bitch.

Congratulations, Bloggess. This seems to indicate you are doing very, very well.
Rev. Back It On Up 13 recently posted..Ask A Big Boss Thursday!

Dear Fucking Bitch,

Only because I spent most of my adult life in PR, OK, the “life” part is stretching it, and the “adult” part as well, must I ask with great gusto, nay, demand, that you marshal your global forces and get photos of:

- Ass Hat Erica
- Douche Canoe Jose

Then post the photos along with their contact details and any porn vids they have starred in. (Mr. Zuckerberg’s new privacy setting will make this dead easy).

During above mentioned payback, please don’t mention the slutcanoe k sisters by name, else Jose and Erica will include in their media infections, er, impressions.

Note: In Houston, a movie called “Erica the Slut” ran from when I was 13-16. Sadly, I never saw it, nor did I know that Erica moved laterally from porn into PR. The skills are certainly transportable.

Final thought. If you find the Rattlesnake, could you courier it to: Erica (“the PR Slut”) and Jose at Douche Canoe PR.

Mwah.

(Told you I had been in PR).

Bill in Nu Zillans
hogsatemysister recently posted..R.I.P. Steve Jobs

Oh! When I started to read this i thought Jose was talking to YOU about Erica. I almost felt badly for him, as well. But wow. This is about the funniest shit I have read in a while. Professional my eye. Seriously. I am curiious about the resoonse you get. Amazed at the stupidity of people, and in awe of how people just do not know how to spell or punctuate sentences.
Andrea recently posted..What it’s all about … #StrongStart

A. I don’t comment often, but I have to say that what’s truly baffling here is that whoever wrote the original form has no grasp of the English language. How can they effectively relate publicly when they can’t spell or use an apostrophe?

2. Jose is a moron. Jose is a moron who likely will not have a job for very long.

C. Sorry, my number 2 really got me laughing. Poor, stupid Jose. I think I’ll take his response to the chair of the business department at my university so she can pin him on the “what not to do” part of the bulletin board in marketing class.
liv recently posted..playing catch-up…

Huh.

Evidently THIS is why I never went into marketing. I mean, I’m all for calling people fucking bitches, but shilling for pantyhose? That’s just nasty.

(How do I miss when you go viral? Stupid life, getting int the way.)

You so totally rock. I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to find you. All hail the Bloggess.

Your snarkiness and relevancy make my life joyful!
qwrgrl recently posted..Grey day – Seems perfect for pj’s, coffee and blogging

I went to check out the Twitter frenzy and, Jenny… I think you broke Twitter. I can’t even log in because it’s over capacity.

You Fucking Bitch!

Please stand by for demonstration of relevancy? I fucking love you, you fucking bitch.
Mr Lady recently posted..Six now, forever and ever.

I can’t get over the fact that he’s VP of a Public Relations company and can’t use spell check. I mean, it does check grammar too. I don’t see why it’s so hard to insult someone properly. If you’re going to be an asshole, be an intellectual asshole.

PS: I’m noticing that Jose’s past work (listed on the BrandLink website) is pretty extensive. Emphasis on “past work.” Sounds like most work for him is soon to be in the past.

PPS: I wonder how many comments Jose can get before he just loses his mind?
liv recently posted..playing catch-up…

And by douche, I mean excellent blog fodder.
A Morning Grouch recently posted..How Could I Not Dream About The Accident?

So, in this guy’s profile on their website (copied and pasted below) something stood out to me – this guy is a total douche bag. Okay, maybe it doesn’t say that in his profile, but read between the lines. I also think they need to update his website profile – last line should say: “Most recently, Mr. Martinez called The Bloggess a fucking bitch, a new and innovative PR technique that Jose will soon patent in his climb up the ladder to his ultimate goal of wiping Donald Trump’s ass.”

Love you, Jenny – you rock!

Jose Martinez

VP, Media Director

Prior to BrandLink Communications, Martinez served as West Coast Vice President at Fingerprint Communications for over two years spearheading media relations on behalf of the agency’s LA-based clients. While at Fingerprint, Martinez worked on clients such as Muscle Milk, 42 Below Vodka, the Malibu Lumber Yard, W Hollywood Hotel, Eva Longoria’s BESO restaurant, Polaroid and Dr. Rey’s Shapewear and managed events for Maxim Magazine, Details Magazine, Rockband, and Oakley, to name a few. Before joining Fingerprint Communications, Martinez oversaw PR campaigns at London-based Freud Communications for Details Magazine, Soho House and The Planet Hollywood Resort & Casino, Las Vegas. He also spearheaded special projects for Elle Magazine, Helio, Moet & Chandon and worked with Sony Pictures Entertainment, Marv Films, American Idol: Idol Gives Back and Bauer Publishing titles Life & Style and In Touch.

During his 5 year tenure at Harrison & Shriftman, Martinez oversaw media campaigns for Los Angeles- based clients. Martinez helped craft publicity, marketing and influencer campaigns for consumer brands, luxury lifestyle products, hospitality properties, as well as managing the agency’s special event division. While there, he worked with Fox, Playboy Magazine, Imagine Entertainment, Cartier, Glamour Magazine, Premiere Magazine, Motorola, EA Games, Teen People, Mr. Chow, Grey Goose vodka, Corzo Tequila, Ugg Australia, Converse, Nintendo, BlackBerry (RIM), Helio, Juicy Couture and Porsche, among others. Martinez started his PR career at independent film consultancy Clein + White.

Oh my fucking god. That is off the show.
Veronica recently posted..PDD-NOS, A serious lack of sleep and why won’t somebody THINK OF THE PARENTS?

Under Transportation, they boast the Mayflower as one of their accounts. The Mayflower. Hee hee.

Love it….:)

I’m pretty sure Jose will be getting fired very soon.
Sarahbear recently posted..Good Customer Service

Shit, I can’t get past the misspellings in the original email. And if bloggers all know to research our research before we hit send why don’t the marketing assholes who are getting paid the $ I need?
Arnebya recently posted..Cool it With the Cute, Gap

For reasons I can’t fully explain, I, for some reason, am repeatedly stunned by how fucking idiotic some people are. You would think this wouldn’t surprise me by now. But it does. Thanks for making it a fun surprise.
Daddy Scratches recently posted..Mother Nature is a heartless wench who will turn your own children against you

A simple “My Bad” on his part really could have saved him a lot of embarrassment. But since he insisted on going the douche bag route I am popping some popcorn and pulling up a seat. Can’t wait to see what comes next.

I used to work in PR and have several friends that still do consumer PR, regularly reaching out to bloggers like yourself. I am embarrassed for the entire profession for Jose’s behavior. The sad part of it is that there are several people out there who act just like Jose – they somehow think because they represent a company (or individual) that they are somehow important. As if the relevance transfers. I’m glad to hear that in the past you’ve dealt with good PR people too – sadly too many bloggers only get to interact with the worst of the profession which is why PR, in general, has such a bad reputation. And um, that apostrophe mistake? Makes me cringe. And get angry.
casacaudill recently posted..FINAL HARVEST (AKA BEATING LOCAL WILDLIFE TO THE PUNCH)

Holy crap. That was insane! Way to make an ass of yourself and your ENTIRE company Jose! Nicely done.
Devon recently posted..Up On The Roof by Devon Stewart

I am a huuuuugggeee fan of the ‘Sorry but…’ apology. Use it with my husband all the time. Thanks for sharing. Loved the exchange.

comment deleted by request of commenter.
Stephanie recently posted..A Few Reasons I Don’t Really Miss College

Waaait…your response originally was just the pic of Wil collating, right? How is that rude? I’m soo confused by that whole situation.

I like responding to emails where people mistakenly include me in the reply all with comments like that with a simple “I can see this, you know.”

Fuck yeah. It’s nice to see a post about these annoying PR emails. I received one today from a firm about “presidential neckties”. The email essentially said, “We notice that you’ve mentioned Obama in a post. Could you talk about this line of neckties?”

What!?!? Fuck you and your neckties.

I must admit, though…I received a note from a representative of another firm this week. Based upon her email, it was obvious that they had been following my site. They quoted numerous posts over the last few weeks, and used language that told me that they were readers. In a situation like that…I’m more than happy to take a few minutes and exchange a couple of emails back and forth. Otherwise, it’s the online equivalent of “cold calling”. I did that in my early twenties. Can’t stand those slimy eels.

Until now, I have simply deleted the emails as they have come into my inbox. Perhaps I should reply in the same fashion as you do. Maybe with a picture of Morgan Freeman holding cotton candy? Automatically deems negotiations null and void.

Jose is an asshat. Cheers, you fucking bitch!

oh poor sweet moronic assholish Jose. The Fans of The Bloggess are gonna make you THEIR bitch for being such an asshat to our Jenny.
Steph recently posted..My Cats are Pretty Much Useless.

Sorry if this has been addressed BUT:
“maybe you should be flattered that you are even viewed relevant enough
to be pitched at all instead of alienated PR firms and PR people – who are actually
the livelihood of any journalists business.”
I gotta be honest, as a journalist, PR people are NOT the livelihood of journalists.

I think you should give Copernicus Jose’s address. I heard he had some new tricks up his sleeve. Something involving duct tape, razor blades, and nipple clamps.
Chris Tucker recently posted..It’s a MisCake!

Your’re an inspiration.

Brilliant. This just made my Friday.

i have not been able to visit your blog or follow your tweets lately and all i can say is:

MY GOD, HOW I’VE MISSED YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you rock, Jenny. period.

Dang!! Just when I got off my meds enough to really go angry-villager on someone and get away with it! Curses!!!!!

My favorite line of Jose’s was this: “To go out of your way to be snarky and rude is a little inappropriate.”

Doesn’t he understand that being snarky and rude is not “out of your way” at all? It was totally appropriate.
suburbancorrespondent recently posted..RIP, Steve Jobs

Oh Bloggess, let me count the ways I love you!! You bring a smile to my face even on those days when my smile wanted to take the day off.

I feel it is a tiny bit less inappropriate to quote Jesus here, since you are The Goddess of Blogging*…

“They know not what they do.”

*That IS what “bloggess” means, right? Should be.

Dear Jose,
You say “fucking bitch” like it’s a bad thing…?

Some people should not be allowed to work in PR. You should send Jose this poster.
http://work.failblog.org/2011/09/28/etiquette-propaganda-for-the-workplace/replyall/

Wallaby (comment 99) is on to something genius. There are so many Jose jokes we have yet to make. Also, what an asshole. Dear PR professionals: You wonder why you have a bad reputation? I’d like to introduce you to Jose.

Go You! And what spectacular career ending move, Jose.

So now we have a poster child for bad PR pitches. What a loser Jose is!

BRAVO to your for not backing down!
Patty at A Day in My NYC recently posted..The Loss of an Icon

New pitch: A picture of Copernicus strangling Jose with the Kardashians’ pantyhose.

My dear Jenny, per usual…pure awesome. Xoxo Christine

AWESOME.
Kris recently posted..Tired, Cranky, Achy, Rainy Day

Wow. I work in PR. Glad to know I now have a blueprint for how to climb the corporate ladder if I so choose. Thanks, Jose, for helping my career take off! I’m off now to reply all to some e-mails I got today. Maybe I can even use Urban Dictionary to really come up with some zingers.
Misty @ The Family Math recently posted..Finding hope in the midst of PPD

(On the other hand, he seems quite capable of spelling “fucking bitch” — so maybe he should be taking out the trash at the marketing company, rather than writing its official emails?)
MommyTime recently posted..Balance

“PR firms and PR people – who are actually the livelihood of any journalists business”

Is it just me, or is that a very 20th-century view of journalism? In the modern world of free blogging, youtube and google-enabled research at everyone’s fingertips, aren’t people like this just a little pissed that they’re becoming a little obsolete?

If you could, I would recommend leaving Beyonce on his doorstep. Knock knock….

Dang! I had my pitchfork all ready… I love “Angry Villager” flash mobs!

I’m pretty sure being called a “fucking bitch” by a nimrod like him qualifies as a compliment.

Love the whole exchange.
All email software needs to add in a confirmation prompt on the Reply All button – this isn’t an isolated incident.
mark @ yelling near you recently posted..Fudge You Fells Wargo

Has anyone helped the sweet girl from the original email file a lawsuit against JOSE for using the phrase, “fucking bitch,” in an inter-office email? Does she have to put up with that? Can she reply to all with, “Oh yeah? Oh yeah? Well you’re a cock sucking subway-pissing dick leak!”
Lorca Damon recently posted..Apparently Spammers Like It When You Talk About Them

Ya know, I come here every day. Sometimes, three or four times a day. Why? Because I am looking for pictures of a Kardashian in pantyhose. ANY Kardashian. Even that mystery one that never gets on TV (what’s her name? Gummo? Whatever.)

Thwarted again. Damn it! But it sounds like these Brandlink people have some. How do I get enough relevance for them to talk to me?

(Oh, I just looked Kim up on Wikipedia. She is involved in something called the Cookie Diet Lawsuit. How is that woman living my bucket list?)
Christian recently posted..Science Smackdown – We have a winner! And a scandal!

Dear Jose,

Knock, knock, Motherfucker! It’s the angry villagers and I don’t believe you know who you are messing with here.

Be nice, or I’ll stab you.

Jane

Wow, Jose is an asshole! My jaw dropped when I read the following “you should be flattered that you are even viewed relevant”. Geez aren’t you glad that your considered to be “someone” because your on their list.
Bitchalittle recently posted..Wednesday Without Words

On what planet are the Kardashians relevant?

Or their pantyhose?

And lol at getting traffic for posting about it

Oh, am I not being very nice? Maybe I should just call you a fucking bitch and be done with it.
Penelope recently posted..Beautiful Hair At Home Made Easier

I know you didn’t want us to go all angry villager on him but gee, Jenny, don’t hate me for loving you. Please forgive me, Bloggess, but I was just feeling so stabby……..
Copy of email I just sent to his company with subject line of “No way Jose.”

Big mistake, Jose. Bloggess may as well read “Goddess” to so very many of us, her loyal followers. You should count yourself lucky to be found worthy of her even mentioning your name and company on her blog. I guess you’re counting on the old adage that even bad publicity is still free publicity. So sad. Good luck in your NEXT job.

P.S. There is a really cool feature on your computer called spell check that actually checks your grammar as well. Maybe it is time for you to learn to use it—like maybe when you find yourself updating your résumé.

The one day I’m not on the fucking Twitter something fun happens. I always miss the good stuff.
Jennifer recently posted..I’m a member of the Transformation Nation

You are truly the most relevant badass I know. Rock on Bloggess!
Kristin recently posted..Spooktacular Fun

Who could find Wil Wheaton collating papers offensive? This guy needs to catch a sense of humour. Maybe he can find one in the classifieds while he’s looking for a new job.
Laura Thomas recently posted..Nature Studies: The Worm Bin Experiment.

Love that you post these. What a jerk-off that guy is. I bet he thinks he’s still right. HA! just read Deidre’s comment (#33), brilliant.
JJ @ 84thand3rd recently posted..Perfect Banana Cake with White Choc Passion-Fruit Icing

Clearly he’s in the wrong (omg.. I send snarky remarks to our helpdesk in regards to emails but I NEVER use reply all.. however sometimes I worry that the helpdesk is going to send my response containing not only my helpful advise but my amusing curmudgeonly snark with THEIR response)
but yeah, I digress..

He must think awful highly of himself to assume that you got a copy of a picture of Wil Wheaton collating paper and constructed an email JUST FOR THEM. It’s a form letter, dude. It just happens to be a fucking hilarious form letter.
andie recently posted..The Construction on Highway 12 can F*** Right Off.

Maybe we should send Jose a giant chicken because he is a bit of a cockhead ? Love from Australia sweety
frogpondsrock recently posted..Sunday Selections #39

Blame it on Mental Illness Week. Jose celebrated by skipping his meds and being his true (f@#$n a**hole) self. He must have Tourette Syndrome amongst other illnesses so let’s just send him a National Mental Illness Week card and forget this ever happened. Except no one will forget… we’ll just pretend to forget… or maybe we will because we’re fricken crazy!
karen recently posted..Soapbox: The Entitlement Generation

Perfect example of what my father always told me….”Joke ‘em if they can’t take a fuck.”

Jose, you are a Douche Bag, which could be overlooked by many. But you also have no sense of humor for which we cannot forgive.

Even though i’m one of the “good ones”, i somehow feel obligated to apologize on behalf of that putz…oy!

I would think that anyone would be fucking tickled pink to get a photo of Wil Wheaton collating papers.

Oh lordy, “please stand by…” is one of the best things I’ve ever read on here, and that’s really saying something. Especially when you can actually turn ON the anti-PR firehose.

I’m glad they’re assholes cause this was awesome to read. Thanks Jenny – you never fail to entertain!
Heather recently posted..Wordless Wednesday – Breakfast Edition

Beyonce, ATTACK!
Kirsten recently posted..amadeus and the hairy ball sacks of life

Jose needs a shot of EVIL Wil Wheaton collating paper.
Jennifer recently posted..Imaginary Conversations With My Dog

Also, I couldn’t HELP but send out a twitter. Or three.
Charity recently posted..Who fucked *up* the ladies room?!?

Beyonce in panythose (our metal Beyonce), now THAT”s a picture I want to see, Jose.
elz recently posted..It’s a Mystery

This has become the highlight of my week! Thanks for sharing! I never knew PR was the perfect fit for my anti-social personality, now I know what types of jobs to start chasing.

This….is why I read. You say all the things I wish I had the guts to say.

Can I be you when I grow up?

“you should be flattered that you are even viewed relevant enough to be pitched at all instead of alienated PR firms and PR people” is especially hilarious to me seeing as how all I have to do is go to one trade show, sign up under “media” and suddenly I’m on at least 50 email lists (many from “PR companies”) about stuff we don’t cover…hmmmmmmm….

Two things:
1) “My blog has nothing to do with fashion, the Kardashians or pantyhose…none of which I understand, to be honest.” -I love this more than any boyfriend I’ve ever had. (And a few relatives.)

2) If anything, I feel sorry for Jose. He’s like that socially-awkward co-worker who’s trying to save face after the lame photoshopped image of his boss holding a penis fell into the wrong hands.
bschooled recently posted..The Black Hole

Jose should learn not to diss the Bloggess, nor her fans. Poor English and grammar? Pro writer? NOT

Wow.

Just wow.

I’ve seen some pretty shameful “reply-all” PR incidents before but that one just takes the cake.
Cat Davis recently posted..Rosemary Roasted Potatoes #Recipe with Knorr Homestyle Chicken Stock

Dear Jenny,

It’s in situations like these I just feel the incredible need to scream WOLVERINES! make sure everyone hears about a big ginormous fail.

I also find it incredibly scary that “ginormous” was actually on my spell checker.

Retelling Like I’m Wil Wheaton Collating Paper

Love at ya!!
-Tony
Tony Hunt recently posted..Be a good person.

Very enjoyable read, and good job on the viral tweet! I’d just like to point out that there were two apostrophe errors in this post. EG: It should be VPs not VP’s. I’m not trying to be a grammar nazi but I’ve noticed this over a few of your posts so far!

That is fantastic, and is a fine example of why one has to be oh so careful when replying to emails.

Bravo!
Kirsten recently posted..Is there a doctor in the house?

Ok, so no pitchforks ( said dejectedly). Can’t we have his email so we can all email him a jpeg of Beyonce at the front door? Sort of a polite non-threat? Knock knock motherfucker, indeed.

Among all of his other failings, apparently Jose is unclear on the meaning of relevant…

Villagers with pitchforks – sounds like a grand idea actually.
a recently posted..Now that some time has passed, I can calmly tell the saga of my computer. It’s a long one.

I. Love. You.

(and I mean that in a “you make me look at the world like it’s a joke…and laugh, and laugh, and laugh, not cry” kinda way)

Oh, Jenny, you are quite simply awesome.

I was SO offended just reading the subject of the pitch (which I received too) “Our Favorite Mommy! Kourtney Kardashian” – SERIOUSLY??? – Thank you for for not being bullied and tackling them. That guy?? what an A$$!

#238 I think that may be the wrong Brand Link. Here is the info, and if you go to “who we are” you’ll see Jose “I have a stick up my ass” Martinez.
http://brandlinkcommunications.com/

And these are the posts that make life all worthwhile. LMFAO

Just another example of why I love you……
Mindy recently posted..The ABC’s Of Me

Like the Kardashians even wear pantyhose…or underwear, for that matter.

It’s not a good day to be Jose. Maybe you can offer to help him update his resume?

I got this ridiculous pitch today too. I’ve been hankering to send it back full of red pen marks, but then I’d have to print it out and would hate to waste the stamp.
Nicely played!

they have a facebook page. http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/BrandLink-Communications/148743778492300
just saying…
Teresa recently posted..I’ve Been on a Mission to Find Myself. It’s Ongoing…

I *LOVE* when people do this:

“Don’t be offended, you started the cursing game” which REALLY says, “But but but, you started it, it’s not MY fault. I don’t know how to take blame for MY own actions….**Crying like a BABY because he’s in A LOT of trouble and got called on his bullshit!**”
LilyBelle recently posted..A bit of an update

I’d rather pay money to read your blog entry on this fantastic PR debacle than read a FREE article on why Kardashian’s wear fucking panty hose. (psssst… it’s to hide the leprosy scars)

p.s. I love you. And I’m sure Jose beats off to your photo, too.

Who the hell wants to know anything about Kourtney Kardashian? Yeah, I know there’s all those shows about this family, but I don’t get it. I think if you advertised her and her damn pantyhose I’d stop reading this blog.
Andrea recently posted..Top 10 Reasons I Love Working in a Psych ER

I can’t believe the Kardashians wear pantyhose/

Don’t forget about @brandlinkjose – he’s now trying to defend himself!

You’re my hero of the day. As is Wil Wheaton. I honestly don’t know why I don’t make time to read your blog every single day. I’ll add Google Reader to my phone and read your stuff in the john if I have to.

what hose (typo and it stays because he’s an absolute douche hose and needs to get hosed) is thinking: “this won’t come back to bite me. i’m a PR firm and my clients won’t care about a blogger.”

what is really happening: tens of thousands of followers and readers are looking at their client list http://www.brandlink.com/ourwork.html and sending their clients notes about their PR dude.

tee.hee.motherfucker.

I think we should take up a collection to send Beyonce to this PR firm’s front door. With a stack of papers to be colated.

“KNOCK KNOCK, MOTHERFSCKER.”

~EdT.
EdT. recently posted..“Eternal iFlame”

So they don’t teach Marketing 101 any longer? My kids are screwed.
Michele recently posted..He Put a Ding in My Universe

If I @knew how to #motherfucking tweet I would.
The Good Luck Duck recently posted..Guess where we went. Guess! Nope, guess again.

you’re like the dirty harry of the interwebs.
fyi, i’m totally stealing ‘Please stand by for a demonstration of relevancy.’

But you’re our kind of effin’ bitch, and that’s the best kind.
PS–I was already laughing hysterically after reading your post, but I fell out of my chair when I read Diedre’s comment (#35)!!!
Paula recently posted..Say, Huh? (#9)

This was my bedtime story. Great way to end the day. Awesome.

Now we need to make you SO RELEVANT THAT THEY BEG.
la.girl recently posted..Spokesperson for meh?

It’s not really an apology when Jose feels the need to qualify the hell out of it. He was WRONG, but he’s trying to punt this back on you because you made him look like an asshole in front of all his colleagues. Maybe dumbass Jose should be in a different line of work if this is how he deals with people with a legitimate question. I’m thinking his hostility needs a more appropriate outlet.
Courtney recently posted..thefourcorners:

They kill me.

I just got calls from 4 clients praising my defense of their brand. Ill be fine. But thanks for making me so important. Xoxo

the devil made me do it. Here is a copy of submission on their contact page.

folks,

Your VP Jose cannot get away with calling The Bloggess at f**king bitch without stirring up a wee bit of controversy. So let me explain this to y’all in words easy for even PR people can unnerstand

Women who blog do so because they have something to say. Treating women who blog with disrespect is nothing more than a mirror held up to your own inadequacies, dick size notwithstanding.

Someone from your august organization might want to have a little sit down with Jose about use of the reply all button as well as his apparent disdain for anyone whose agenda does not dovetail with his. And if you are loathe to have this conversation, you may wish to call his mother. I’m sure she will be happy to explain it to him.

Respectfully submitted,
The Wifely Person
Sj recently posted..You Are What You Wear

Do they even KNOW who you are!? You’re the freaking BLOGGESS for goodness sake! You are the GODDESS OF BLOGGING. I’ll remember not to work with this PR company in the future.

As a PR person that DOES THE HOMEWORK… I’m offended at the initial pitch. Just did 50+ hours for a client making sure we pitched the RIGHT bloggers with the right tone. AND the reaction of Jose – - wondering if the PRSA Ethics committee would say on his handling?

Loving the response via twitter from @BrandlinkComm: https://twitter.com/#!/BrandlinkComm/status/122128542527012864

You had me at hello. And then again at knock-knock. And now this? Don’t ever leave the internets or my heart will break in a thousand pulpy pieces.
anne nahm recently posted..Meanwhile, in Cootieville…

As a newspaper’s managing editor let me just say pr people are not the fucking livelihood of journalists’ work. They are fucking pains in the ass that send out “our client’s too fucking cheap to buy an ad so run this shot no one cares about for free” and them they call 40 times because the first 39 hangups and hell no’s were too vague. Fucking douche bags. Vp of sucking something other than a pencil tip is all that jackass is.

But…can I still go all angry-villager on them? I kind of want to. My friends and I think you’re awesome. So much so, one time I sent you a still-drunk-the-next-morning-after-girls-night (where we got to talking about blogs, and eventually how I love you so) e-mail and you responded and it was kind of the best morning of my life. Minus hating life at work.

end of story: you’re awesome? Yes. And Then Some.

WOW. This is unbelievable. You can’t make this shit up. WHY did these people happen to you all the time? Do you have some kind of asshole magnet on you? Or as my good friend Elly told me about this term, you may just be a born Wrangler of Assholes… I LOVE the 1st comment. Indeed, an apology is not an apology when you try to “qualify” it. Now I am absolutely convinced: there is no need for me to learn more about Kim what’s her name. In all honesty, I still have no idea who she is and why we should care. Remember that picture that was shared around facebook about how a book died when you watch Jersey Shore? Well, to me this Kim whatshername and people that are associated with her kill human souls.
subWOW recently posted..A Beautiful Mind

Who is the real fucking bitch here…I think her name is Jose.
A Vapid Blonde recently posted..What Can You Do?

Man, it’s sure is heartwarming to see the Twitter mentions go up. They seem to have someone on their FB page hitting the delete button a whole lot of times. I wonder if they’re going to get any overtime out of this.

Know what I like best about this, though? I’d never heard of this blog (er, sorry) until Wil Wheaton made mention of the sitch on Twitter. Thanks, Jose! You really do know how to bring people together.

Damn, what a tool! Maybe he’ll pull his head out in time to see all the tweets. And use “reply all” more judiciously.

Jose…When your wrong, your wrong.

Just sayin’….

Shit nuggets I wish I twittered like the rest of you hipster types!

Knock,Knock Jose….Wil Wheaton is retweeting. The Bloggess is a rocking, fucking bitch. Thanks, Jenny…keep ‘em coming!

…?
How do people like that even get a job and then manage to keep it?
tokenblogger recently posted..A picture laden post…

“@BrandlinkComm BrandLink
Ironic that today would be the day that technology would bite me in the butt, lesson learned. All hail @thebloggess”

Bwahahahahaha. Guess someone blinked.

Sarcasm is a lost form of artistic expression. If you can’t laugh at yourself? Don’t laugh at all as you are most assuredly boring and a liberal.

As someone who just finished working in the PR field (not for that company, thank goodness), I apologize on behalf of my people. We aren’t all so awful.

Jose sounds like the fucking bitch. Tell him you are going to pretend he is an angry bird named Jose and slam him against every tree and building you can find. Then collate him. I am glad you contacted his company on twitter. Beside…who cares about a Kardashian in pantyhose. I could live without ever seeing a Kardashian.
Connie recently posted..More pictures

and I thought my read between the lines that you are an idiot email from a PR company today was bad! At least they didn’t accidentially hit reply all to tell me how awful I was.

I think your PR page is hilarious!
Briana recently posted..No Giveaway for You!

Well, really…you should be ashamed of yourself. They were obviously offering you a legitimate opportunity, which they determined would be in your best interest after carefully reading your blog. They are clearly the most heartfelt and sincere of all PR firms, and rather than thank them for choosing *you* (and I am sure, only you), you dared to reply with wit.

Horrifying. Simply Horrifying.

Well, they did get you to inform us that Kard-what-the-hell-ever-is-her-name wore some pantyhose. ROFL

I am more likely to run out and buy some paper to collate though.

THANK YOU for making my day. BTW, i work in PR. Jose is a disgrace to the profession. What a mega-douche.

And Neil Gaiman just retweeted this whole thing, too. He has 1.6 million Twitter followers. Relevant much?

As a former PR professional… his response was beyond ridiculous. Honestly, I’m wondering what kind of company he works for if he’s a VP. There must be 3 people in the company – Him, the CEO, and the Assistant. I’ve never, EVER witnessed any reputable PR people using their work email to exchange profane-laden email messages.

Your responses were perfect

Love it. Shame on him for not apologizing.

You rock. End of story.

Okay, and I’m still dumbfounded that he didn’t double check the Reply All… but then again, it doesn’t sound like he’s having a good day at all.
Nathalie Lussier recently posted..Education and Entrepreneurship for Girls Around The World

It was probably painful for them to see you tweet that to 164k followers. It will be much worse when they realize it was retweeted by Neil Gaiman to 1,400,000 followers! Yikes. That’s a bad day for a PR firm.

I love that Neil Gaiman retweeted you… And I absolutely LOVE your Wil Wheaton collating paper photo. And these idiots you’ve blogged about need to take a refresher course in PR.
Pattie recently posted..Facebook Changes – Lists and Public Posts

Researching the bloggers might be wise….. Don’t they know you have found a missing rattle snakes and you already have everything needed to ship a box or diseased Cobras? What kind of fool would mess with that?

*foot in mouth* then
Melissa recently posted..Weeding Through the Market

Jenny, you are a Hero
/hug to you for by showing bloggers everywhere that it’s ok to have standards by actively standing up for yours.

We should all feel sorry for poor LITTLE Jose. He’s clearly over compensating for areas he doesn’t feel “relevant” in.

I love you because your response was awesome and spot on, but I love you even more because you used it to bolster us with words like amazing and relevant. That shit can make the difference to a blogger like me, between staying true to yourself or accepting the bullshit out of fear that the Man won’t come knocking on your door with fistfuls of dollars, Klout points and relevancy.
Joules recently posted..Capture the Everyday – Vroom

Considering how much WORSE your reply could have been to the original email (I think the Wil Wheaton page is quite harmless), I don’t see where the “Fucking bitch” comes in. The women in his life must be damn near sainthood if what you do qualifies for THAT type of name-calling.

I don’t usually indulge in schadenfreude, but I do kind of hope his poor manners and stupidity at LEAST result in a formal warning. Heh.
Samantha M. recently posted..30 Before 30: My Old-Woman Rant

He went with the “you started it” argument? I’m impressed that he got the PR job in the first place, but I’m hoping they take the “reply all” button away from him, clearly he can’t even figure out that his argument was incorrect as well as juvenile. His retort makes me feel all stabby.
Dawn Marie recently posted..Foggy Day – In water color

I think you should send Jose a cookie tray or something. What great fodder for a very funny post. He takes self importance to new levels.

Oh my god, I can’t believe what a total asshole The Bloggess is. Thanks for hosting this blog, Jose. We really needed a place where we could talk shit about Jenny Lawson without her being able to see it.
Backpacking Dad recently posted..I Once Tried to Get Rich Placing Tiny Classified Ads

What I want to know is how some douche-y, unprofessional and unskilled dude can have a job that probably pays quite well and has also apparently done stuff for all those great places (as listed in his profile). Who the hell does the hiring for firms like this? Does his daddy own the company or something? I’d bet there’s a helluva lot of unemployed people out there who’d do a damn sight better than this Jose guy.

You fail, Jose… You so awesomely fail…

i always sort of take it as a compliment when some stupid butt monkey calls me a nasty name. it’s probably because he feels inadequate and powerless when confronted with awesomely powerful women.

First-time reader here, and this is exactly the right way of approach I’d expect from a blogger. I hope he has learned his lesson. Well done, Jenny!
Sid recently posted..Wireless Backup of Mac HD With Time Capsule For Mac [Overview]

All I can say is WOW! I love you Jenny. I was a victim of the “reply all” when I said “damn, she is like a dog with a bone”… resulting in meetings of me, my boss… the “dog” her boss and the boss’ boss… I won the battle, but it took a long time to win back my position with the big boss… but it was SO worth it! PR companies suck and I am sick of the cardashians… or whatever their names are!

The Kardashians wear pantyhose? Oh yeah, just saw this tweet by Jose to Wil Wheton:
“I was defending you! If you knew the whole story”.
Umm. The whole story? You mean the one posted here. That’s pretty much whole story for you.
Douchebag.
Pantyhose.
Bil Simser recently posted..Adopting the Metro Style for Line of Business Apps

bwahahahahahaa
::falls off chair laughing::

Good for you!
Just today, I posed the question on my FB page if I am being unreasonable for asking something in return for posting shit on my blog for *brands* or companies…more and more they are asking me to do that – for nothing in return. I only got two responses…I’m not terribly relevant it appears…but at least they both agreed with me! This post solidifies that fact that yep…I was right!
xxoo

I guess Brandlink is going to find out whether there’s really no such thing as bad publicity

Oh my. I hope he’s learned a very big lesson from this one. He sure didn’t realize who he was dealing with.

And on a more serious note, can I say big “Thank You” for taking such an important stand with PR companies and doing it in the most hilarious way so that we can all laugh and laugh and then laugh some more. Only you can get away with all that you say… and for those of us that only wish we could say it, we thank you.

If you ever knife (it’s a VERB! I iz an Englitch majpr!) Victor to death, gimme a call.

Now that Wil Wheaton and Neil Gaiman jumped on board, that’s how many MILLIONS of people reading this? GREAT STUFF! And Jose is trying to defend himself from his twitter…and then he’s thanking GOD for being blessed, and saying TGIF even thou it’s still Thursday in his timezone. I think he is getting dumber by the minute.

Sounds like someone needs to grow a sense of humor. And professionalism. Just being nice wouldn’t hurt either.
Anne-Marie @ This Mama Cooks! recently posted..Quick and Easy Quiche {Eggland’s Best brunch kit giveaway}

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say that PR is probably not his true calling in life.
Kate recently posted..Thursday 13 (for real, this time)

Why we love you, Jenny.

I’ve had the kindest people get back to me and say, “thanks for letting us know.”

And I”ve had crazies say, “your loss.”

They have NO IDEA, do they?

That is sad.

How easy would it be for them to click on and see number of comments you get, number of followers on twitter: SO EASY.

A caveman could do it.

xo
Alexandra recently posted..To The Group of Horrified Teens Sitting Next To Me At The 10 PM Showing of Crazy Stupid Love: I Am Sorry

honesty, mayb you shouldnt ave started it by wasteing our tim
Jose recently posted..W Hotel Hollywood

I think Jose needs a mental health day, but he doesn’t get a pinata or a card…

They have 1000 followers on Twitter, so obviously, they’re “big”. Sigh.

Jose should be fired.

And? You really should consider yourself lucky
Natalie recently posted..Just Breathe

This is Awesome. Love it.

You are my idol and hero. Blogging for a chance at a coupon bullshit for people who don’t even get your name right is exactly why I went to university.

Love the power of the Internet….

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
@wilw I was defending you! If you knew the whole story!

wilw Wil Wheaton
“@BrandLinkJose: @wilw I was defending you! If you knew the whole story!” Keep going, Jose. You’re TOTALLY not making it worse for yourself.

wilw Wil Wheaton
I have concluded that the only thing more hilariously awesome than #PRFail is #PRFailDamageControlFail.

scalzi John Scalzi
by wilw
We know this: @BrandLinkComm brought this doucheageddeon upon themselves.

So wait, I’m confused, is his email attitude the hospitality portion of Jose’s Twitter bio or the Marketing/PR part? Or, no wait, it’s the ROI, right? Because what a return!!

Also? “Please stand by for a demonstration of relevancy.” is just brilliant!
Karen recently posted..New York Freelance Writer

“But we told you we own you, WTH??” signed, PR flacks

I have a sneaking suspicion that Jose is not going to sleep very well tonight.
CoffeeJitters recently posted..It isn’t easy being pink

Surely @brandlinkjose’s Twitter account can’t be real. Can it? CAN IT? Oh my goodness. If he’s the VP I’m going to apply for Empress of Brandlink- I’m definitely qualified. For one thing, I have a firm grasp of the conventions of written language.
Milehimama recently posted..Toothless

Now Wil is really in it because Jose is claiming he was defending Wil. It is WAY past my bed time but I just can’t turn away. It’s better than a soap opera.
laanba recently posted..Apple Girl

Oh my. Butterflies. Beautifully done!

New t-shirt: You just pulled a Jose
Sharon recently posted..Spinning: It’s Not My Legs That Hurt

I like the picture of Wil Wheaton collating. Sounds to me like Jose is one of those people who just CANNOT apologize or acknowledge that he did something wrong. I live with one of those, the only way to deal with them is to tell them to fuck off.
Amber recently posted..The Color Purple

I was really hoping to meet a guy with a really big pitchfork at the angry villager’s social and after party. Can we please still have it? I’m in need of new friends; the last ones were run out of town on a rail.

Reply 256 or 389…. Really?

“…maybe you should be flattered that you are even viewed relevant enough
to be pitched at all instead of alienated PR firms and PR people – who are actually
the livelihood of any journalists business.”

Beyond the bad attitude and horrible treatment meted out to The Bloggess here, I see a couple of errors, both in the next to last word. First of all, there should be an apostrophe between the t and the s. Also, the entire word should be in quotes. Because no true journalist actually depends on PR folks for their livelihood, no matter how much PR folks may want to tell themselves that. They depend on PR folks for finding something to fill in the extra nooks and crannies left in the day’s news hole after they’ve put in as much actual news, found through their own hard work and cultivated sources. Also, even if said reporter is working to fill in the gaps and going to PR folks for help, they don’t get to call themselves an actual journalist if they’re actually responding to pitches that involve what sort of leg coverings reality TV starlets are wearing.

Maybe Jose was having a bad day and needs a hug. You should send him a Copernicus card and a reference for his job search.

The comments are almost as good as the post. Relevant indeed.

“Don’t be offended, you started the cursing game so maybe we should all just laugh it off…”

I mean, I’m laughing, but I don’t think it’s for the reason they were hoping for. Damn the man! Save the Empire!
Gretchen @ Honey, I Shrunk the Gretchen! recently posted..Fat Acceptance

really Jose? You posted AGAIN? (#286 & #389) And you didn’t have anyone check your spelling or grammar before hitting “send”? And you boasted having as many as FOUR of your 1000 clients back you? And it’s OK for you to send irrelevant e-mail pitches, wasting the time of countless people but receiving one humorous response wasted YOUR time? Your mother must be so proud. Since you can’t apologize worth beans, you need to just shut-up. Seriously. You have been humiliated and outclassed.

This is just fantastic. Instead of offering a simple apology Jose keeps digging himself deeper and deeper into a hole. I love seeing stupid people like Jose fail epically. As an added bonus now there are thousands of bloggers who will completely dismiss anything Brand Link emails them. Thanks for making my night.
Alouise recently posted..The Restricted Travel Blues

You. Go. Girl.

Jenny,

PLEASE keep us informed of any more “dialogue” you might have from Jose. I am SO hoping this blog post goes viral and then Jose will have to PR his way out of huge shit storm that he created. Keep the pressure up in this guy and we will soon see who is *relevant* and who is not.

I wouldn’t assume that the posts by “jose” are by the actual Jose. There are these things on the internet called trolls…

Yep – I think she broke the Twitter.

I’ve attempted to ponder an explanation that Jose may offer up to his employer when questioned on his written reaction:
1) diarrhea of the digits …. an uncontrollable urge to type shit;
2) someone peed in his breakfast cereal;
3) his frontal lobe was damaged after his head stuck a urinal, when he was rise from a kneeled position;
4) he is a misogynist who’s mother made him wear dresses in the house; and finally
5) he is a self-loathing, POS, without any means by which to relieve his frustration other than a garage sale vacuum cleaner and a jar of dollar store petroleum jelly!

Your spunkiness rocks!

Wow! The twitter is broken, WTG Jenny! I <3 you!

@Patti,

If that’s even Jose and if he really got 4 people supporting him, then I think the score is 4 for him and… let’s see… Um, Twitter is down (did we bring it down knocking the PR firm?)… but from memory Jenny has about 160,000 followers and Wil Wheaton has over 1.8 million.

Even if we assume that all of Jenny’s followers are included in Wil’s, that’s 4 for Jose and nearly 2 million for Jenny. Is that score close enough for you Jose?
TechyDad recently posted..Aloha Friday

Wow, some people cannot get it and cannot even be taught to get it even if you explain it to them several times. How many followers does Jose have on his blog?

I completely agree with David (#80). We need a “Please stand by for a demonstration of relevancy” shirt!
TechyDad recently posted..Aloha Friday

(getting the “Fail Whale” over at @BrandlinkComm – I think you crashed Twitter. Dude, you has da powers!)

Apparently nobody ever told Jose not to e-mail anything he wouldn’t want his mother to read. I say that to my boys all. the. time. Maybe I’ll have my kids read this post in the name of digital citizenship. Thanks Jenny.
kim/reluctant renovator recently posted..It’s a Vintage Cluttercast Fashion Show Giveaway!

I hope our good friend Jose learns how the internet works…
Jenny Grace recently posted..It’s a wonder I manage to walk and breathe at the same time.

Wow! Jose had FOUR whole clients call him!!! FOUR!!!!
Forget your 165k+++ followers (many of whom retweeted) and Wil’s gazillion followers (who also retweeted), Jose had FOUR clients call! What’s a million or so unimpressed consumers to his FOUR clients?!?

GOD!

P.S. I teach Business Etiquette in my Business Communications class. May I use this as an example of really fucking stupid behaviour by a “professional”?

@TechyDad (#437) She’s also been RT’d by Neil Gaiman who has many thousands of followers as well.

My wife and I agree about something. Twitter dies under the strain of the BrandLinkComm issue and Jenny’s site chugs along with no discernible issues. I think Twitter needs to contact Jenny’s web hosting company for some stability advice.
TechyDad recently posted..Aloha Friday

I also very politely posted a comment on their Facebook page, and my comments got deleted. Wow. What a company.

Damn. I typed a comment of which I was pretty proud, clicked to see what the “haven’t forgotten” thing was about, expecting a pop-up box, and got taken to my own website and my comment went poof.

Sigh.

If #389 is really Jose, he needs to put the bottle down and ask a friend – someone female, and not in PR – to explain to him why he is so completely wrong and needs to simply SHUT. UP.

If #389 is someone pretending to be Jose, WELL DONE.

This is to funny. I LOVE the “you should be flattered” thing. They make it seem that they actually look at the blogs to see if they think they are deserving of the PR attention….I haven’t been blogging for a while. My site is still up so that my readers could grab all the recipes on it, but I removed all contact info. I STILL get these PR pitches although it clearly states on my FRONT PAGE that I am no longer blogging. Not only do they still send these pitches, but they got a hold of a private email address and send them there to! Now, I might like to pretend that I was so GREAT that they still think I’m deserving of their attention, but in reality, they are just sending the same email to anyone who ever post anything anywhere LOL.

Obviously Jose didn’t quite realize who he was calling “a fucking bitch!” Bahahaha. I bet he won’t make that mistake again.
Krystle {snarkykisses} recently posted..About This Place

Unbelievable. I’m floored that his response was so rude and brush-offy when he got caught doing something really, really unprofessional and should merely have apologized and kept his mouth shut.

But since he didn’t, and therefore laid the groundwork for disrespect, I will say this: Dude needs to learn to spell. He works in PR, which, you know, uses words and all.

Also, I’m dying to be a fly on the wall when they figure out who you are.
Robin | Farewell, Stranger recently posted..On Steve Jobs and Living the Life You’re Meant To

Also, who wants to take bets that little Jose doesn’t have a job very soon?
Krystle {snarkykisses} recently posted..About This Place

I’m just impressed you resisted the urge to correct all their ridiculous grammar issues in your responses to them. I think there would have come a point I would have just sent them a redlined copy of their email(s) with proofreading marks. Dipshit moron weirdos.

*noun. he will become a noun . . . Oy
Kristin recently posted..The picture. It’s a metaphor. A *really* obvious one.

You are my favorite fucking bitch. Way to school ‘em, Jenny.
califmom recently posted..Colored Ribbons: Fucking Cancer

“Please stand by for a demonstration of relevancy” and then, you broke twitter. You deserve a crown and I think Jose needs some Jose Cuervo tonight!
Teresa recently posted..Heather Tovey commented on the blog post Pinterest Directory

Oopsie Jose!!! LMAO!
Shop with Me Mama (Kim) recently posted..Being Grounded

Two words: fucking epic!
ConvertingME recently posted..My Dream Job

Maybe this was all a clever ploy.

From their Social Media & Viral Marketing services:
“We have also been instrumental in creating unique viral videos, as well as mobile device applications which we distribute through a network of tastemakers, ensuring that the content reaches as wide an audience as possible, thus elevating the profile of a client’s brand and products.”

What’s more viral among bloggers and their followers than being a douche canoe to The Bloggess! William Fucking Shatner couldn’t handle it!

Well, there is one person above the VP and that’s the President. I would ask to directly to talk to him. That is wrong and VERY unprofessional.

This PR person thinks your response to Jose and his teeny, tiny pseudo PR firm was brilliant. And the Tweeting? Best part. Good for you.

Sadly, the PR industry has lost a lot of its polish over the last few years. Mostly due to covering insignificants and irrelevants such as the Kardashians and their pantyhose.

Could y’all just take a hot second and read some of Jose’s latest tweets? You really CAN’T make this stuff up:
https://twitter.com/#!/BrandLinkJose

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
BIG day tomorrow @work. Sweet dreams! Xx
2 minutes ago Favorite Retweet Reply ? Proxlet
**If he only knew. Carol from Facebook has clearly not contacted him…*

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
Today was a good day. Blessed to be alive healthy and loved. I love you my friends! We know what’s important. #commonbond.
2 minutes ago

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
Thank goodness daddys a lawyer. These armani boots I bought online for the trip are cute!
7 minutes ago
**You’re gonna have LOTS of free time to take these trips…”

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
Tired but looking at the website for ibiza. Can’t wait for this trip. Nothin like sand and sun!
1 hour ago
**Just stay in Ibiza…**

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
We raised so much for breast cancer awareness today! We need to unite and take care of eachother. #breastcancerawareness
1 hour ago

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
Fun night out with friends over coffee and dinner. Tgif!
2 hours ago
**Does he realize it’s Thursday?**

BrandLinkJose Jose Marino Martinez
@wilw I was defending you! If you knew the whole story!
**Right, because Wil didn’t pose for that picture on his own…**

no way jose, we don’t deal with that hanky-panky and tomfoolery.
Goradde recently posted..Whatever it is, it’s all yours.

I fucking love email wars with morons. Why?

1) I always win.
2) They’re still morons.
3) Everybody laughs. (well, except for the morons.)
Mel recently posted..I’d hate to be them.

I think Jose must work for one of the banks I am dealing with – that is about what I am getting from them – thanks for the chuckle, the laugh out loud that my family looked at me like I had lost my mind and most of all – for sticking to your guns – you make me proud to be in good company “another fucking bitch”

Awesome. And Wil Wheaton even responded. Did I mention awesome?

This was like a “How to Fail at PR’ demonstration. With so many things wrong with it I chose to focus on the abuse of apostrophes and sent them The Oatmeal’s excellent guide http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apostrophe

To keep twitter from continuing to explode, can I suggest that henceforth we use

FUCKERBITCH

instead of

FUCKING BITCH

Thank you.
hogsatemysister recently posted..R.I.P. Steve Jobs

This makes me laugh – well said and the right reaction!
I wish you the best luck to have with a PR-Agency next time
Kai Thrun recently posted..Danke Steve.

Please make a t-shirt out of this. Anything. A hoodie, a turtleneck, a half shirt.

I need something to wear with my pantyhose.
ZDub recently posted..I Was A Victim Of A Perfume Hate Crime. On My Porch.

“Stand by for demonstration of relavency”

Bloggess followers tweet & retweet & facebook
(slow clap)
Retweeted by Will Wheaton, King of all Geeks
(clapping builds)
Retweeted by Neil Gaiman, King of All of the Things
(cue standing O)
Retweeted by John Scalzi, Lord of the Nerds
(syncronized foot stomping)
Instant viral sensation? Priceless
Because it’s not just who you are, it’s who you know. Isn’t networking, like, PR or something?
Ami recently posted..EVERYthing MUST Go

you ARE awesome!!

Jenny,
The previous commenters have said everything else so well. Thank you for the P.S. in your post. As one of the many, many tiny bloggers who receives annoying, offtopic, and often borderline rude PR emails weekly (along with the follow-up, vaguely threatening “why haven’t you replied?” emails) I appreciate you taking the tiime to call out bad PR practices. Hopefully, some of the firms will listen and care.
Zoie @ TouchstoneZ recently posted..Breastfeeding Quiets the Multiple Minds

Go Jenny! “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” … and we only get better with age! Ha! Hope to still be reading you when you’re my age! You’ll probably still be blogging, but do you think Jose will still be in PR?

You have made my morning. I get emails every day from inept PRs trying to get me to advertise/promote my competitors etc. I think if I ever have to have a lobotomy my next career move will be into PR …

I got to partake in my first twitter war thanks to you!!

You, as well as we who love you, are a tsunami. Jose, and his PR ilk, have no chance. And he knows it. He is not sleeping well tonight.
Susan Says… recently posted..I Hadn’t Planned On Being Sad Today But Steve Jobs and Michael Jackson Gave Me No Choice.

If you’re gonna be a whore, at least you should be the “fucking” kind.
Sidney recently posted..Greg’s Afternoon

I think I figured out the twisted labyrinth of causality behind this. See, they saw the picture of Wil and assumed that you would totally be into pictures of Cardassians in pantyhose….

What do you mean, not those kind of Cardassians? What other kind are there?
PixelFish recently posted..Hummingbird

You just keep firing right through their greedy hearts Jenny. There are many of us [elbow to elbow] out here doing our very best to give the Wii advert wankers, the right proper shellacking their flabby asses need. Oh hi acid-tongued angel… press on toward our infinite spank!

Lawd above, what a hot mess. I’m *almost* tempted to join the twitter just to see what all the fuss is about. Anyway, you’re relavent to ME, Jenny. Fight the good fight!
crystal_b recently posted..Sittin’ on the Stoop

To be fair, you did start the cursing game, if they read the text of the WW post. But you didn’t start the name calling.

Thank you. WOW. I cannot believe this!

Not only did you demonstrate your relevancy, you let this be a lesson for soooooo many other PR companies and their bcc generic messages. I am sure, quite so, that THIS incident right here will become a teachable lesson on so many fronts…

I <3 you for this post.

You have made my night… THANK YOU
Marie Denee recently posted..While I am at it- Saks Yanks its Salon Z In Stores

I’m sorry I called you a fucking bitch. Perhaps in the future, if you could refrain from displeasing me, I wouldn’t be forced to do it again.

Classic. Comedy GOLD!

I just gotta say.. who can be offended by a picture of Wil Wheaton collating?! Honestly, who can look at that little smug collating smirk and not giggle just the tiniest bit?

Someone whose soul has been devoured by harpies, that’s who.

So this is what you get up to while I’m at work. And then I don’t know about it until I get home and it’s all over. You really need to DM me on Twitter if you are going to start a virtual lynching. You know. So I can join in.

OMG! You are AMAZBALLS! My brain is exploding from all of the awesome coming off this page.

A company that can not 1. show common curtesy and 2. Takes themselves too seriously are not worth your time and energy. I work in finance and the majority of my time is spent in customer contact. If I received your reply email I would have laugh myself sick then called all the girls around to laugh some more. We would declare you hilarious and would foster a client relationship built on mutual humour. Not call you names and DEFINATELY not send the responses you received. My boss would kick my butt!

Good on you for finding the humour in life and sharing the giggles.

I’m curious what Brandlink’s clients’ response will be. Their names are getting tangled up in all this negative SEO. I was going to go to bed hours ago, but this is too entertaining.

So, let me make sure I’ve got this straight, Jenny…

This brainless buffoon is giving a lesson on relevance to YOU? I mean, to the original, one-and-only, genuine article bloggess… as in *The* Bloggess? The matron extraordinaire of online snark?

You are the archetype, the seminal one, the often-mimicked-but-never-matched master of what you do. Not to mention the RULER SUPREME OVER LEGIONS OF ONLINE MINIONS.

Anyway, my point is this: Did I miss something? Because the schooling on relevance should be going in the other direction here.

At the intersection of ignorance and arrogance, we find Jose, perhaps the worst PR guy in the history of ever.
Brian the Kwyjibo recently posted..I Parked Next to Oscar the Grouch’s Car Today

Despite the epic gongshow Jose spurred on, I’m almost more distressed by his tweet that it’s “ironic” that today is the day he suffers from a sudden awareness or what technology does. How is this ironic? Was he a very close, personal and relevant friend of Steve Jobs? Is this the anniversary of his purchasing a computer? Was today the very first time he posted his own tweet? His grammatical errors, lack of worthwhile content, wildly inflated sense of self-worth and general lack of class are tremendously disappointing: however, for some reason it is that one incorrect usage of the word “ironic” that’s bothering me the most. (Granted, I wasn’t the one accidentally forwarded such a delightful email. If I had been the recipient I would definitely have more relevant and important things on my mind, like the Kardashians’ pantyhose situation or whatever spectacular situation they decided you were worthy of being pitched).
Doesn’t Jose know it’s not polite to be so obviously idiotic when you’re tying to enjoy a nice, relaxing Mental Health Week? So disrespectful.

Is “Wil Wheaton” a cuss word now? Otherwise how did you start with the cursing?
Anastasia recently posted..The Quiet At 3AM

A PR company in Edinburgh, Scotland just tweeted your story!

“The importance of relevance in PR pitching…and a lesson on the perils of ‘Reply All’!”

I LOVE IT!!

Ok, 1) Wow, I swear the shit that happens when I sleep, just amazing. 2)I really kinda wish I knew how twitter worked so I could see the shit storm. I can’t find any of it when I clicked on the link for the PR’s twitter page. I see like, 1 post seemingly related. Bah. At least I can swim through the comments here to enjoy some of it.
meg recently posted..Update on Marissa’s room

Hi there, long time lurker first time post-er.  I love this post because it shows how people in either a positions of authority (Pres, VP etc.) or in the celebrity world think they are so much better than the rest of us little people.  It’s like Mr. VP thought you should LOVE his form letter because he was giving you access to the ever so secret world of the Kardashian’s.  What he fails to remember is that his company generated that form letter to pimp out their clients to the rest of the known world. 
It’s really kind of sad that millionaires need pimps these days but I guess that is part of the price of fame. Oh wait, there are people who don’t give a shit and don’t WANT the masses to know they took a crap today?  Astonishing. 
What a bastard. 
See I could have said – fucking bastard- but I would hate for people to think I am in PR. 

Epic… some PR people are awesome but the majority of them are just incredibly annoying

Two thoughts in addition to what everyone else has said.

1. PR is NOT the lifeblood of journalism. As a journalist, I take offence to that. We are capable of coming up with our own ideas and making our own contacts.

2. PR agencies don’t decide where their clients advertise. That’s usually controlled by the media agency.

“Doucheageddeon” = my new most favorite word ever.

~EdT.
EdT. recently posted..“Eternal iFlame”

Really?! Really?! This dude needs to be visited by a group of psychotic sock monkeys with sharp instruments sewn to their little cloth hands. What a total d-bag! Please, oh please tell me Jose got fired and is now living in the same box he used to clean out his cubicle.

Your response is exactly why you deserve the title of THE BLOGGESS!

Oh. My. Word.

I wonder if Jose still has a job.

Usually when you play with Tarbaby nobody wins, but if I’m not mistaken you just took him D.O.W.N.

There should be a prize for that.
Robin Dance ~ PENSIEVE recently posted..Ten things 31 Days of Parenting Teens Tweens, Day 5

Awesome.
This is a PR firm that did no research, they should have owned that from the start.
Several of us mommy bloggers in NYC share invites and it is amazing who gets what and how unrelated pitches are to blogs.
We, with you at the lead, are changing this!
Yay!
Mitch
Mitch recently posted..DreamWorks Pictures New Movie, Real Steel, Starring Hugh Jackman, Who Attended A Round Table With the Bloggers!

What truly baffles me about this is that ANYONE could get annoyed about a pic of Wil Wheaton!? That’s like getting pissy because someone sent you a cupcake carried by kittens.

“but then I remembered that this isn’t the 18th century and that I’ve never taken a high road in my entire life.”

My new motto
Tori recently posted..What I Want In My Closet

What can I say? Your blog is now in my favourites, and I’d never heard of you before today.

Word of mouth: Best PR there is.

Wow! That was amazing. Thanks for doing this for all of us less than relevant bloggers out there.

Dear Bloggess – I want to be you when I grow up. Actually, I don’t plan on growing up, but, I still want to be you. xo Anne

One of the best things I’ve read all week, hahaha.
Carly recently posted..Introducing the AboutUs.org Site Report Tool – Review

Wow, that was one of the most epic things I’ve ever seen.

You win the internet!
Blippitt recently posted..News Minute: Top Stories for October 7 2011 (VIDEO)

Holy hell! Sometimes I wonder how some companies stay in business when they have people like Jose work for them.
Jayme (RandomBlogette) recently posted..#FYL Twitter Kick-Off Party Is Tonight!

I got the same pitch and responded:

Thank you, but I do not blog about fashion or Kourtney Kardashian.

I am SO tired of being sent info to throw up on my blog. And I’m tired of publicists not knowing what I write about before sending me stuff to throw up on my blog like I have no editorial considerations.

Anyway, I never heard back from Erica or Lauren but I’m quite sure I was called a “bitch” somewhere, either verbally or elsewhere.

Good for you!

I was having such a lousy day, and then I read this. Oh, thank you. You just made my day!

This is why I need a life re-do. I went to bed laughing while I followed the email war w/comments and woke up wanting to know how it was progressing. Did you know that Neil Gaimon retweeted the link?…yea…in my book that was the ‘Game.Over.’ for dear, misguided Jose.

Way to Rock a Thursday night (and now Friday morning) Jenny!!! Love you!

Becky, you say, “There’s no such thing as bad publicity, right?” and it sounds right. Heck, it’s been, what, a hundred and fifty years or so since Oscar Wilde said, “The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about” and you’d think it was as true now as it was then.

Except for one little thing: this may or may not be true, but I understand a happy customer tells an average of six people about their experience while an unhappy customer tells an average of thirteen (which may be the origin of triskaidekaphobia).

But this is a PR firm. In other words they thrive on attention, good or bad. So, yeah, for them any publicity is good publicity, even if the publicity they’re getting makes their employees look like semi-literate jerks.
Christopher recently posted..Who Goes There?

Please Jenny, can you tell us if he mentioned that his daddys (sic) a lawyer?

An very similar thing happened to me in March. This post was also cross-posted on Ragan.com were I am a contributor and guess what? I got a lot of criticism from other PR people who thought I was much to hard on these spammers! PR people need to learn how to stand up to bad PR! That is the only way to save the profession in the long run. Thanks for the great post and the laughs.. Claire

http://www.publicrelationsprincess.com/2011/03/pr-spam-case-study-the-truth-be-told-you-should-be-outraged.html

Hey Jenny,

Now I am totally confused if I should still send you the pitch to promote the reality show I’M producing called: “Skinny Rich Women Yelling At Each Other.”

Jenny, you’re still the best kind of fucked up, but you’re no one’s “bitch.” Hugs.
Tara recently posted..Royal Weddings Need More Meth…

You know until now I’ve resisted twitter. This exchange might just tip me over the edge just so I can join the fun. Best laugh of my day so far

Also, can we trust a PR company that can’t actually WRITE? I don’t think so.
Six Impossible Things recently posted..Homebody, table for one

Well said, and, to point out the obvious, Jose, and his company, need to learn how to use an apostrophe.

Wow. I bet Jose will be “fucking packing” his desk for his “fucking walk” out of the “fucking door.”
Dangerboy recently posted..Sculpting with Fire

I think I love you. Laugh out loud excellence.

Wish I’d seen this before I hosted an event on this very subject last Wednesday – an excellent example of terrible PR. Makes you value the good ones

Thank you for blogging and tweeting about this – it’s a story that had to be told and will make a great urban legend among PR professionals about the importance of respect and professionalism.

Andrea Smart @ThePRLab

OMG, that is a different world. I run a charity in Africa and never read things like this but I was hooked. What a dumb-ass, didn’t the dude know you have hundreds of thousands of followers? –wow Anyhow, this is not super relevant to my work but it was fun to read, glad you shared, .

John Scalzi pointed me this way. And I’m glad he did. I’m totally subscribing.

Also, WIN for understanding social media before pretending you know how to make money off of people using social media.
Eric J Ehlers recently posted..Nerdy Intellectual Exercise

Oh come on…. just a FEW angry-villager tweets? P-p-p-p–lease?
Ryan (The Woven Moments) recently posted..This Meal Brought To You By The Letter ‘C’

First off- no fair. I am the F-ing Bitch. Ask my ex husband. He surely can tell you.

second. how does he have a job??

wow. i thought i respected you when you made beyonce an overnight celebrity. this… THIS is truly amazing.
John B recently posted..blame tv

1) obviously these folks haven’t read your blog. ever.
2) i don’t think you are any kind of bitch. your blog has been a great help to me. i was recently diagnosed with depression but due to finances, was unable to get the help i needed. during this time of limbo, there were days when the only time i smiled or laughed was when i read about your shenanagins. my husband would always say, “are you reading that blog again? it’s good to hear you laugh.” so if being a “fucking bitch” means that you helped me when i was lost in the fog, then god bless you: i dub thee HRH Fucking Bitch. i’d give you a tiara but i don’t have one to spare. thank you for your gift; it means more than i could ever say.

p.s. i recently was able to recieve help in managing my depression. i’m not out of the woods yet but at least i’m on the path.

You know, the email is bad enough. Then he had to add incorrect grammar? Too much. ESPECIALLY for a company that makes a living writing and talking.

Oh, and the “You started it” thing was awesome.

Coming back again this morning just to read these comments. I wish there was a like/share button by some of these! Your readers are an absolute hoot! Is it sad that I just want to sit here all day and follow every single one of them for bringing me so much laughter to this situation?

Who cares if Jose’s daddy is a lawyer? He was the one who “replied all” using expletives about a blogger that has like 164k Twitter Followers and told HER that she should be happy to be pitched to. I think he has earned the “PR Idiot of the Year” award.

I bet you have rocked his world all the way to the unemployment office!
Teresa recently posted..Red Writing Hood: Mom of a Teenager

That was awesome. I’ve only just started getting hit on by PR firms. I will keep your response in mind for the more persistent and irrelevant pitches.
Cris recently posted..Road trip

Such a beautiful response to such rude characters. This calls for a “You are the WORST kind of fucked up” card

“We will do a better job to research who we are
pitching but maybe you should be flattered that you are even viewed relevant enough
to be pitched at all instead of alienated PR firms and PR people – who are actually
the livelihood of any journalists business.”

TYPOS galore! Ugh. Permission to clown punch him, please.
Jenni recently posted..Leo

Dear Bloggess,

I love you. You are the friend I need in my life. Thanks for giving me a laugh. Happy Friday!

Blog on.
Ash recently posted..And then the PR guy called me “a fucking bitch”. I can’t even make this shit up.

I love this. I love that you never give up and defeat asshatery just by being you. You are a superhero. (Just remember, no capes.)

I’d say if nothing else, 616 comments makes you very relevant. This “PR Company” must have 4 employees other wise your response would have been lost in a sea of “remove me” emails.

I’ve been reading the comments on their facebook wall and am disappointed with Carol’s attitude. She’s just going to forgive him because he “is a very well respected publicist and beloved by so many in the media”.

PR really is a joke, anywhere else would fire someone who did what Jose did. I wish I had a Chase account just so I could close it.
Terri K (@tkharmonic) recently posted..tkharmonic: Excited ‘cos I just entered to win the Retrevo Gadget #Giveaway! You can enter too: http://t.co/c875xuGD #Sweepstakes #Win #Contest

Now I guess I need to go get involved in twitter. Been avoiding it, but you’d make me do it. You made me buy a big metal chicken for my 14th anniversary too.

You are awesome! I love the angry villagers idea. But, seriously, not everyone has the guts and ability to say what needs to be said. I’m glad you did!

This is the stuff movies are made of…amazing.

Wow! You and your commenters are handling this so beautifully–the whole PR and rudeness aspect, etc. I am also troubled by the basic lack of command of Standard American English, grammar, and usage in the messages from a PR company. I would not want them to work for me…
Kathleen recently posted..A Ghost’s Day Off

This story was just discussed on Chicago morning talk radio WLS. Relevant? I think so.

My itty bitty comment is going to be all lost in your myriad comments (I’m so impressed; Holy Caw!), but because my tweep in Hong Kong said, “Jayme, you’re gonna love this,” I had to respond and say, “Indeed.”

And, as I was reading and wondering why the firm was being protected, lo, it no longer was. I’m so embarrassed when my “peers” do shit like this. No way are they researching blogger one, and since when is blogger outreach tied to advertising? Baffled? Me, as well.

This type of work is just plain old spam PR and that guy believes journalists rely on that. #Fail
Jayme Soulati recently posted..China Gets Expensive; Can U.S. Manufacturing Benefit?

I’m not a blogger, but I AM a journalist. And I take great offense to this, in particular:

“… PR firms and PR people – who are actually the livelihood of any journalists business.”

No, Jose. PR folks (while there are a *few* great ones out there) are actually the bane of our existence — especially the ones who think they’re indispensable, who spell common plurals with apostrophes and who omit the apostrophes from possessives (as in “any journalist’s business”).

Even if I wanted to use the drivel from press releases submitted by people like Jose, I have to do way too much editing and cleaning up the copy. And if I sound bitter it’s because Jose gets to sit in a cushy office and draw probably double my salary, yet he’s in the communications business and has a sixth-grade-level writing ability.

People like Jose make me sick and deserve all the pitchforks they have coming.