So this year I forgot to wear green on St. Patrick’s day and totally fucked up Rodeo Day (which is a real holiday in Texas and stop judging us, Canada) but I am totally prepared for today which is apparently NATIONAL CLEAVAGE DAY.
UPDATE: Apparently I am the only person in my office even aware of National Cleavage Day. Also I was asked to go home and change because “it’s important for people in HR to act professional” and I was all “THIS IS AN OFFICIAL HOLIDAY” and they’re all “What makes it so ‘official’?” and I’m like “IT HAS IT’S OWN WIKIPEDIA PAGE.” Then they made me put on a sweater because they don’t understand wikipedia. So basically my breasts and my civil rights are suffocating. This is like when women aren’t allowed to breast-feed in public places, except worse because on National Cleavage Day everyone suffers.
UPDATE #2: I’m celebrating National Cleavage Day here in spite of the oppression and if you leave me a link in the comments with a picture of your hooters I will totally come celebrate your cleavage. Probably so will a lot of weird strangers. It’s probably best not to do that after all.
Comment of the day: Since it was obvious how upset you were with the whole having to wear a sweater at work thing, I decided to go to the store and buy you a “Happy National Cleavage Day” card. I couldn’t find them so I asked this old guy at the register where I would find them and he was all “uhh…I don’t think that’s a real holiday”. Then I had to explain how if wikipedia said it was a holiday then it was a holiday. All he could say is “what?” So I repeated it but louder cause I figured he had bad hearing or something. Then he told me “we don’t have any cards for that.” I told him that it was a sin not having any cards for this holiday. By that time I was being very loud & he kicked me out. Oh did I mention the only store in town is run by Mennonites? ~ Gracie Lace