So the other day I was talking to my friend Christine and I told her she should stop reading my blog this week because I was about to take down the Pope and she’s all “Honestly, you make me hurt inside. Please leave my Pope alone” and I’m all “Well he fucking started it” and Christine was all “YOU’RE NOT EVEN ON HIS RADAR” and then the other people in the elevator started looking uncomfortable and I’m all “HE’S TRYING TO DESTROY ME” and then Christine sighed very Catholicky and was all “Okay, fine. How is the Pope trying to destroy you?” and I explained that my blog traffic is down like 15% this month and I’m pretty sure it’s because the Pope told everyone to get off the internet for Lent which is very easy for him to say because I’m fairly certain the Pope isn’t a big twitterer. Although if he was it would probably look a lot like this.
You know what would totally suck? Being the Pope’s secretary. Because if a normal boss walks in on you and you’re playing on the internet you’re going to get in trouble but if the Pope walks in on you and you’re playing online solitaire when you’re supposed to be typing Popie things you are totally fucked.
PS. Christine gave me tacit permission to blame the Pope for destroying my blog because she said I was “too imbecilic to take seriously” but I’m pretty sure making up a fake twitter Pope account might be a mortal sin. But Christine also told me if you didn’t actually learn what the mortal sins are they don’t count against you so I’m pretty much still guaranteed my 14 virgins and a mule which is my basic understanding of what you’re supposed to get in heaven.
Comment of the day: I think, actually, you only get 7 virgins. At least that’s what the Pope told me in his last email. Which was yesterday.
Wait a minute… ~ Miss Britt