Well, at least it’s on brand.

Two things. Slightly related.

One.

So last night my friend Mary texted me a picture of her copy of People Magazine and there’s apparently a three page spread in there about Broken and my family and related lovely weirdness so we all got in the car to pick up a copy at the grocery store but none of us have been in a grocery store in a year so instead Victor said he’d run in alone (double masked) to grab one and then a few minutes later he got back in the car and was like, “First time out of the house in a year and I almost got into a fight.” Turns out he was in the express line and the guy behind him was like, “This is the express line, dude,” and Victor was like, “I know. I only have this magazine” and the guy was like, “The express line is for groceries. You have to have a People magazine at 9:00 at night?” and Victor was like, “IF YOU MUST KNOW, MY WIFE IS IN THIS” and the guy looked at the cover and was like, “Huh. You a big Jennifer Garner super-fan?” and then Victor angrily paged through the magazine to find the spread but he couldn’t find it and finally he just stalked off back to the car and was like, “I COULDN’T EVEN FIND IT. YOU FIND IT AND WE’LL HOLD IT UP TO THE CAR WINDOW AS HE LEAVES THE STORE” and I was like, “Dude. You need practice at people” but then I flipped through and I was like, “Wait. I’m not even in this. I bet it’s in tomorrow’s edition” and Victor was like, “YOU’RE NOT EVEN IN IT? I JUST WENT TO A GROCERY STORE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A YEAR TO BUY A RANDOM JENNIFER GARNER EXPOSE AND YELL AT SOMEONE ABOUT A MAGAZINE YOU’RE NOT EVEN IN?” and then Hailey and I never stopped laughing, but technically this is very on brand and exactly the sort of story that would end up in my book.

Two.

Speaking of my book, I wanted to do something fun for Independent Bookstore Day (April 25th) because it’s a wonderful day when people go support indie bookstores and the bookstores celebrate and there are exclusive books and literary items you can get that day (some for free!) and one thing I’ve always wanted to make is an oracle deck. I’ve collected oracle and tarot and transformation decks since I was a kid but what I love about oracle decks is that they have no rules. They’re just a collection of cards that could contain anything from Hip-Hop Queens to Literary Witches and you just pull a card each day to set your intentions or answer a question or just carry with you to hand to a friend who seems to need it. So I partnered with my publisher and my incredibly talented friend, Katie Gamb, to make a small oracle deck based on Broken (in the best possible way). I’ll be sharing the cards here this month in a lead-up to Indie Bookstore Day when tons of Indie Bookstores will have oracle decks to give out for free to customers. YAY FOR FREE! (Nowhere will have a limited supply as well but I’m not sure if we’ll be open to the public by then or if we’ll be sending them out with curbside orders or tying them to tiny parachutes and dropping them off the roof onto unsuspecting passers-by.) And if for some reason you can’t leave the house and support your indie store digitally we’re working on a digital option.

There are a dozen cards in the deck that I’ll start sharing here next week but for now, here is a peek at the front of the cover:

And the back of the card with directions:

It’s one of my favorite projects ever and I love that it helps indie bookstores and rewards wonderful people who support them. These are a few of my favorite things.

PS. If you’re reading this, grocery store dude, it totally does exist. Even though I personally haven’t seen one yet. Also, that Jennifer Garner piece was fantastic.

(Photo by Robin Jerstad)

99 thoughts on “Well, at least it’s on brand.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I just learned about oracle decks a few weeks ago and now I want one and I especially want one from you. I will have to figure out how to make this work. Also yes, that is totally on brand for you guys. ::snerk::

  2. There’s so much awesomeness here I don’t even know what to say…hoo-rah for Victor in the express line, and my word, Bloggess, you are making waves in the best possible ways!! ❤️

  3. Loving the contrast between the two pictures they used. You having your brain jack hammered and then you lounging peacefully in a hammock chair. Not sure I’d be able to gracefully get in and out of that hammock swing chair. Kuddos to you! Looking forward to seeing all the awesome Oracle Cards.

  4. Yay! So excited!!! I will be on the lookout for the magazine too! Express line and all

  5. I just learned about Oracle decks today, in this blog, and now I want one too. . . Especially a Jenny Lawson oracle deck because it’s bound to predict some pretty weird shit.

  6. Wait, how do they do a 3 page story on you and not tell you?

    (They told me, but I haven’t seen one in person to know exactly what it looks like. 🙂 ~ Jenny)

  7. Just read the PEOPLE article!! So proud of you!!

    Will you be shipping Oracle cards to Canada? I’d like to try to get one if finances allow!

    (Not sure how Nowhere is going to give out our allotted cards but I’ll be sure to let everyone know before Indie Bookstore Day. 🙂 ~ Jenny)

  8. Interesting. Never knew about Oracle decks. Tarot frighten me becsusdcggey come true way too often. Love that you’re in People and that Victor didn’t deck that moron.

  9. Sitting here wishing you’ll make this deck something I can buy because I won’t be able to be in a store and want a physical deck and not just a virtual one.

  10. Woo-hoo! Your book comes out SOON, which means it comes out to my house soon! YAY!
    I forwarded an email from Barnes & Noble to Matt and Elizabeth that both “Bone Shard Daughter” and “Broken (in the best possible way)” are showcased in. I think it’s pretty cool. NOT that I don’t support indie bookstores, but that you are famous and pick and write great books.

  11. I didnt know the Express lane was only for EMERGENCY GROCERIES? Pretty sure it doesn’t say that on the sign at my local store

  12. Victor’s a mensch. And grocery store dude probably hasn’t read a book since the last time a teacher made him do it anyway.

  13. This might be the greatest news ever and I’m so incredibly happy. Indie Bookstore Day is literally my favorite holiday, and this year will be the best yet!!

  14. Love this story and can’t wait to get my pre-ordered copy of Broken next week! One small (snarky but hopefully helpful) ,,, illustrated needs an s on the Oracle deck 🙂

    (Fixed! I posted the first one with the typo accidentally. Also very on brand for me though. ~ Jenny)

  15. This is all great but I’m still mad at the guy who thinks you’re not allowed to buy a magazine (or whatever else you want) in the express line! You can’t go making up a 9pm rule either, dude!

  16. I know nothing about oracle cards, but they sound fun and useful and I need them now.

    Sending love – none of us know how to people after a year of being feral at home. I wore makeup every day this week (husband had surgery) and tried to eye-smile at people over my mask and just felt weird & creepy about being near so many strangers when I can’t even hug my mom yet, so there’s that.

    One shot down, one to go….

  17. I am delighted you have made an oracle card deck!
    I have wanted my very own deck for years but I keep changing what I want and it never gets done.
    I don’t like traditional tarot decks and others seem silly to me….
    I am going to want one of your decks for certain!
    Good for you, Jenny.
    ♥♥♥♥♥♥

  18. You totally need to sell the deck!! I don’t live around any awesome bookstores (the one that was here closed many years ago). So you would be my only source!!! ❤️ Love the pics in the article. Will need to holdup an express lane to purchase the magazine so I can read it 😁

  19. I would love one of your decks. (I collect tarot decks too) Alas, there are no independent bookstores open near me. I’d be happy to order another book from you, if that would work!

  20. Congrats on the People magazine (alleged). I REALLY want an oracle deck, but they probably won’t be anywhere near where I live (rural north Georgia). I have at least 2 pre-orders of the book coming (yeah!)

  21. The little bird! With the little bandage! I need it!

    PS That guy was just probably hangry and unable to realize that the time it takes to buy a magazine is under 60 seconds.

  22. I, like, *really* need one of these for…reasons. But, there’s no way I’m going out to shop because a) pandemic is surging here again and b) social anxiety. I’m so glad to know there is a planned virtual options but is there anyway to sell hard copies?

  23. Jenny, Jenny, Jenny!!!
    I don’t know what an oracle deck even means, but I LOVE cards!!!
    Do you think that you’ll eventually be creating packs for sale via the website?
    Could there possibly be 52 for Solitaire/Poker/GoFish?
    I’m still planning on a trip to San Antonio some day, but until then, it’s The Fantastic Strangelings and shopping at your online store.
    Also…
    My husband has no desire whatsoever to go to Texas, BUT…
    He found a SanAntonio quarter and gave it to me because of YOU!!!
    He knows he’s going to SanAntonio to visit my imaginary best friend’s bookstore.
    He LOVES books, so I’m sure it’ll all work out.
    We’ll stop by the Alamo too.
    Much love to you, Victor, and Hailey…and Jennifer Garner!
    Susan

  24. Second mention of Oracle decks to me in 2 days. I’m paying attention Universe.

    Also please do use tiny parachutes and rain at least a few down from the roof because HOW FUN, and please let the wind bring one all the way to Canada.

    (Actually that would cause way too much destruction. Universe, undo that last please, the world is going through enough. But I trust Jenny understands the sentiment!)

  25. That is too funny about the grocery store! That kind of weirdness frequently happens to me as well. And what a great photo of you in that spread! 🙂 You look so comfortable and… literary! 😀

    Lastly, the editor in me feels compelled to mention that in the second paragraph of the description for the back of the cards, the title of your book (appears on the second-to-last line) should be italic. 🙂

    That was a complicated sentence, wasn’t it? As I told someone else recently, I’m an editor who eschews the rules, like a doctor who smokes. My mother always told me, “Do as I say, not as I do.” I guess that stuff trickles down. LOL So I agree: Yay for no rules! 🙂

  26. If there is a pre-order list or link or something for the Oracle Deck, please let me know because I have been searching for a good oracle deck for a couple years now and this would be PERFECT.
    TL:DR – BROKEN Oracle Deck? TAKE MY MONIES!

  27. So many hilarious stories in this post!! I actually came across the People article on my news feed on my phone this morning, and it was amazing! I want to go pick it up too! Wonder what’ll happen if I send my husband in for it!

  28. Wait, wait, just wait a minute…. Will we know what bookstores will have these magical oracle cards? Cause if I don’t get them, I’m quitting. Quitting what? Not really sure yet. But it will be something mildly annoying I’m sure.

  29. What do I have to do to get this oracle deck because I also collect oracle decks and if I don’t get this one I WILL DIE. but no pressure.

  30. I pre-ordered Broken from Nowhere (directly, not via Bookshop.org) after I withdrew from the Strangelings Club. But unless everyone in the club is getting a deck I’m not expecting I will. I’m not sure what my local indie will be doing for April 25th but at least I will be fully vaccinated by then so will hope their line to get a turn inside isn’t too long.

  31. Loved reading the piece in People and love that story! Also, I grew up in San Antonio and consider random hostility over stupid shit like that to be very on brand for the city.

  32. I so feel Victor here. I can imagine turning around and saying, “Sit all the way down, WHILE YOU STILL CAN.”

  33. I really really need this Oracle Deck. Will Bookpeople in Austin get some? They’re like five minutes from my house.

  34. My google alerts told me you were appearing in People last night (or the night before??? What is time???) so I hope you didn’t miss it!

  35. And to add to the random weirdness of People magazine, I received a copy today in the mail. I am not a subscriber and naturally assumed it was for one of my neighbors. Nope! My address, wrong name. So, uhh, if you want me to mail you the random People magazine that decided it wanted to live with me, I’d be happy to!

  36. Express line in NY is for ten or less items, not just food!

  37. Awesome on the People article, and the oracle deck. I’m working on a oracle deck of my own. I will look for the People article, and I hope I can score a deck!

  38. I LOVE ORACLE DECKS!!!!
    I’m already getting the book on the virtual tour. But that means no deck.
    Print more please!

  39. I’ve been looking at oracle cards for a few months trying to find a deck I connect with and of corse it would be your when I can’t get to texas. I’ve been furloughed for a year and would’ve just driven to texas (from cali) but that’s the week I finally go back to work. I guess fate is telling me no but at least I laughed for 5 mins at the Victor story lol

  40. Omg. That’s just amazing. All of it. Oh Victor. But hey! At least vaccines are a thing! And weirdness is being celebrated more and more, and supporting others! I’m going to have to look into oracle carsa now, I’m so curious!

  41. Is there a way to buy the deck? Or know what shops have them for free???

    (They’re only offered for free but usually the week before Indie Bookstore Day the bookstores start sharing what they have and what they’re giving out. 🙂 ~Jenny)

  42. I definitely need more details on this deck! Please open it to online sales! I’ll even buy multiples so I can spread some weirdness to other people who need it.

  43. I’m sorry that happened, but my friend Kathleen West and her book IS in that edition, so you should check her out!

  44. Holy cats, an oracle deck sounds awesome! I love oracle/tarot cards, and used to collect them, but lost all mine (and my library) in an apartment fire. Since IBD falls on my birthday, I think I will need to treat myself to restarting a collection. 🥳

  45. When our library got the People magazine, I just happened to notice that article about you and your new book. I might’ve stopped working for a minute or two while I read it!

  46. Awesome article! I need to buy a Broken Oracle deck, can you sell it in your store online?
    My husband doesn’t handle grocery store A-holes well either. That’s why when we are forced to go to the store to get the stuff that our grocery delivery service was out of, we sneak in on a Sunday or Monday night right before they close for the night and have fewer customers, and with double masks on, avoiding as many people as we can on the way. For some reason there are people who shop at grocery stores who feel they can start arguments at the express line and nitpick about every little thing, so I always avoid them. They’re fussing at what items you have and how many items, but then they go the wrong way down the one way aisles and wear chin diapers instead of masks, and feel that they have the right to huff and puff and sigh if you go to self checkout and you have a problem that requires the floor supervisor to come over to fix it. Avoid store bullies is a annoying task that I don’t miss from shopping in person.

  47. When I saw the pic I thought it said “Oracle Dick” and since your headline was about being on-brand it still worked! Haha!

    I hope I can find an indie bookstore to get my DECK (although, it’s been a long, long, lonely year for the most part, so…).

    I love you, Jenny, and I wonder if you and I will be on similar TMS schedules again (my second round lined up perfectly with your first).

  48. This post is a roller coaster.

    But then. The oracle cards would only be US indie stores, right? Us Aussies have any luck?

  49. “The express lane is only for groceries” is the weirdest supermarket rule, ever. What if Victor was buying rutabagas and the magazine? Would that be allowed in the express lane, or is that two different purchases? I’m very confused.

  50. At least it was People Magazine. To their dismay and the rest of the family’s hysterical laughter, my parents somehow ended up in the National Enquirer.

  51. Well yes, this is very on-brand for you, lol. And now I’m really tempted to run out and grab a copy of that magazine, but it’s been A Week and the weekend was supposed to be ‘no leaving the house’ so I dunno. (Around here the whole ‘going places’ thing is sorta-kinda getting back to normal but my mom has medical issues so I try very hard to make her limit her amount of ‘going places’.)

    When I started reading the second part I mis-read the date and thought the ‘on-brand’ was that you wanted to do something for that date but it’s already passed so you are doing it late, haha.

  52. I am so SAD!! We no longer have an independent book seller in Fairbanks, Alaska, only Barnes & Noble. Our last indie closed in 2019 right before the pandemic. I totally put it on my calendar just to spread the word to my friends. Thank you for sharing!!

  53. Is that like a Texas law or something?! Our express lanes in TN say, “15 ITEMS or less”. Or whatever number they choose. There is no mention of what type of items! Tampons, silly straws, helium balloons, felt dots for your kitchen cabinets, phone charging cords, diapers, silly putty, lighter fluid, hair picks… you name it. That dude was being a cranky old man. 🥊🥊🥊

  54. To Grocery Store Dude – who made you the boss of the express line? Is a magazine an item? Then Victor is all good, even if his wife isn’t in it.

  55. Will the decks be available for purchase online for those of us who don’t have an indie store that’ll have them?? I want your cards😩😩😩

  56. On the Grocery Store Dude–as Cindy said there are a LOT of things that qualify as an item sometimes even an Emergency Item. About a thousand years ago when I was 19 my boyfriend and I made a late night run to the grocery store for one item and we thought it was an emergency, A box of condoms! I shudder to think what might have happened if he couldn’t have grabbed them and gone through the Express Lane. I rest my case.

  57. Ooo- what a beautiful illustration! I want your oracle deck, & will skip paying a bill to get it! 😉

    Also, who the fuck was that guy to judge what someone is buying? I once had a guy give me shit about being on a pay phone (it was 1984) & he wanted to use it. I turned my back on him then, but would absolutely BLAST someone like that today.

    I’m not as nice as I used to be

  58. It’s the 69th thought so I figure it needs to be sexual.

    Of course that may be triggering for people, unfortunately including myself.

    So instead I’ll do a knock-knock joke. Everyone loves those, right?

    Knock-knock! (Who’s there) Make the Oracle cards available online!

    Okay that wasn’t funny at all, but at least it wasn’t sexual.

  59. Jenny, do you see? Do you see how your living your own life, and in the only way you personally can live your own life, has created a beacon to people whom you may never meet. We are laughing, smiling, but also torn apart by each other’s depths of despair, all while reading your blog, books, videos, etc.
    You’ve made a safe place for us, too. Right under the desk if need be! You are one beautiful, awesome woman. I am so happy I saw ‘Furiously Happy’ one day as I was scrolling through book descriptions to find a new book to read. And, here I am, so thankful to you for giving me a laugh, or wiping away tears (because that helps, too). I wish you a beautiful night with stars shining all around you, to make you the fairy queen you are. Much love to you❤️

  60. Well now I’m going to have to buy another copy to try to get the Broken Oracle Deck because if I don’t get one and can’t buy one 2021 is going to suck even more than 2020. And that’s a shit ton of suckiness

  61. The People quest should be relatively easy. I got my second vaccine a week ago and braved the grocery store today. So strange shopping for myself. I think I’ve spent over $500 on grocery delivery tips in the last year. I’m a good tipper and happy to be helping people earn a living. But back to the quests. I might have to quit my job and stalk the indie bookstores to get the Broken Oracle Deck even if I have to buy another copy of the book. Otherwise 2021 will suck even more than 2020, the suckiest year ever.

  62. Which issue are you featured on?

    (The April 12th one. Apparently it’s out now but I haven’t ventured out again yet. ~ Jenny)

  63. You are my hero, Jenny. I have severe anxiety and depression and your books and blog make me feel not so alone. I am very lucky and have an extremely understanding and accomodating husband and job, but some days/weeks even that doesn’t help in my broken brain. I hope you read this so you can see just how much you mean to people. xoxo

  64. I almost bought the People magazine yesterday, but when I looked at the contents page, your article wasn’t listed. I thought maybe it was in last week’s and I missed it. It was the Jennifer Garner issue?

  65. You are the BEAUTY Issue!!!! Fabulous and of course, so true. Wonderful article. How miraculous you have a cure for your anxiety and depression. No, not a complete cure, but a manageable cure which gives you peace. If you need periodic “cure renewals” at least you know where to go to get them which is a 1000 times better than before.
    Oracle cards —- sign me up. Hope, inspiration, humor and sparks of joy—all good things.
    Grocery Line Guy was an idiot. Victor had ONE thing to buy, right? How much LESS did Grocery Line Guy have, hmmm? I get Victor’s response, but I would have loudly and with much snark announced astonishment in being in front of the guy who obviously needed to purchase HIS one item as fast as possible, so YES, by all means, do go in front of me while I and everyone else patiently wait for him…..public humiliation; same principle as putting someone in the stocks of the public square. Thanks for being you and providing us with much happiness

  66. First thought I had was, your friend Mary’s playing an April Fools joke on you guys (probably knowing Victor would get involved in his wonderfully unique way).

  67. I love Oracle cards. I have a Dolphin deck, little round cards, and I pull one every Sunday night for the next week to work with. I also journal about that week’s card and what it could mean and how is it relative to my life at that moment, or even the entirety of my life. I’ve been doing this for most of this plague year and it’s been quite eye opening. There are times where the card doesn’t seem to resonate with me, but the journaling really brings so many things up from the depths, mostly positive, and if not, how do I work with what was brought to my attention. They have been really interesting to me. This week’s card is “Free Flow.”

    Anyway, saw the article and snatched up several copies to send to my sisters, also big fans. I am soooo looking forward to getting your book. I have 2 coming. 1 for me and 1 for my best friend.

    Love to you and the family. Btw, you rock, Victor.

  68. So much to love in this post but my eyeballs got stuck on “We’re not sure if we’ll be open by then” and I thought by golly that is honestly going to end soon. I need my eyeballs back now. PS Congratulations to Katie Gamb even the cover of your deck is welcoming and perfect.

  69. I’m SO here for the Oracle Deck, it looks amazing! Super excited!!!!

  70. Enjoyed reading your story in the April 12th, Special Double Issue Of People magazine. They are calling it the “Beautiful Issue 2021” with Chrissy Teigen and her children on the cover. Your story, on pages 101-103 are the best in the issue, IMHO. My mail carrier hand-delivered the magazine on Thursday (I was actually outside), but I didn’t begin reading it until today after you had mentioned you are in it. I noticed your name is listed on page 4. My People subscription expires sometime this month, so I am glad that I will have this keepsake as I have been following you since you posted the Beyonce caper all those years ago.
    Enjoy your Easter with your family or friends whether online or in person. So glad I and everyone in my family have received our immunizations and hope 2021 will begin to improve as more people can also acquire immunity.
    I will also purchase an Oracle Deck, if you decide to sell them. I have enjoyed my other purchases from your bookshop.

  71. Just read the USA today review fan girling all the way through. Can’t wait to listen to my copy!

  72. OMG please please please make them available to those of us who live in far away places.

  73. I am another née to oracle cards but I have a daughter starting college in the fall. I love this idea! I’ve already pre-ordered my copy of your audiobook but I will definitely look forward these. You are a true goddess to those of us who have discovered you and shared your words. 🙃

  74. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who collects tarot decks. Now I need to check out oracle decks. Thanks Jenny.

  75. You have a brief mention in the AARP Magazine April/May issue in they book section – this is the issue with Michael Douglas on the cover. I don’t see a way to share a screenshot in comments, or I would! XO

  76. Where it there a rule that you can’t buy a magazine in an express lane? That is some seriously pedantic BS there! I’d buy a single magazine in an express lane! It’s LESS THAN 15 items. I’ve never seen a sign about which 15 items that includes or excludes!

  77. Great news on “the View” today, an Amazon editor gave a brief mention of the TOP THREE books to read in April and BROKEN was mentioned. YEA!! So, now I have two more books to consider as soon as I am done listening to you read Broken. I have purchased multiple versions of all of your books, and so far this is my favorite. It is about such a serious issue and yet is so funny. Thank you and congratulations, you certainly deserve all of the accolades.

  78. I laughed so hard I couldn’t hear half of people’s awkward moments tweets. And Victor and the rat story made me wet myself. I believe laughter and humor are Godly gifts. So thanks Jenny, as always you are such a blessing.
    Jamie

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