Thank you!

March 14, 2013

in I am totally overrated,Let's Pretend This Never Happened,Random crap

EEEEEEEE.

That is the sound of a hamster being squeezed too tightly by a three-year-old. It is also the sound I’m making after finding out that your tremendous support of the paperback version of my book (which came out last week) is now #5 on the NYT paperback list. I am so incredibly lucky to have such an amazing community behind me who is willing to buy a book all over again just so they can read the bonus chapter. Also, I have lots of great tour stories to tell you when the tour is finally over (Come see me?) but for now let me just say that the greatest part about touring is watching nervous people creep in alone but leave as groups of new friends. I am so lucky to be a part of your bizarre tribe.

Picture of a few awesome people from last week's book tour. They smelled like cupcakes and magnificence.

And to thank you a tiny bit for all of your bad-assness I’m giving away five autographed copies of the new book this week. And if you already have one you can just sell it on eBay, or use it as a coaster, or give it to your newest friend to test how easily offended they are. Just leave a comment and I’ll pick people before I leave again for the next leg of the tour.

PS. For real. Thank you. We did this together.

{ 2093 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Raechelle March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: Pick me! xoxo
2 Lydia March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: You deserve all of it, you really do!
3 Marissa March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: I want a copy so bad!
4 Jables March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: Book! Need! Already own but must have signed copy!!!
5 Jillian March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: I am going to enter that giveaway because I desperately want another copy of your book and I don’t give a toss that I have two already.
Jillian recently posted..The Swingset, Or Saving Jilly Boyd
6 Tragic Sandwich March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: Congratulations! You absolutely deserve this success, and I’m glad it’s coming to you. Enjoy!
Tragic Sandwich recently posted..3 A.M. Wakeup Call
7 Kat Davis March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: Congrats! Wooo hooo
8 Mallory March 14, 2013 at 4:03 pm: A signed copy would be amazing – I just have the kindle version…not “just”…just…AHHH

Anyway, the book is awesome, you’re awesome, and you’ve earned all of this!
Mallory recently posted..Upcoming project
9 Rebecka Reddick March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: Aww, I’m so happy for you. Is this new bonus chapter going to be in the Kindle version too?
Rebecka Reddick recently posted..Road Trips, Vintage Edition: Ditch The GPS
10 Jami March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: You are so awesome! I wish you were coming to Columbus, Ohio
11 Pam Smith March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: When I read your book (ebook version, I don’t have a paper copy!!), I would excitedly tell my husband everything that happened. I just couldn’t keep the hilarity to myself. Eventually he told me to stop because he wanted to read it when I was done!
12 knobody March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: i admit to being one of the cheap bastards who read the bonus chapter in the store and didn’t buy a second copy of your book.

you may all now shame me.
13 Rachel J March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: Weird attracts weird, but it’s a good weird. I’m just waiting for my next paycheck to run out and get the new book.
14 Karen March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: Best tribe ever!
15 Jean March 14, 2013 at 4:04 pm: You deserve it! Wonderful book. It make me laugh and cry You’re a beautiful writer, Jenny.
Jean recently posted..Pinterest Has Become My Frenemy
16 Jessica Persons March 14, 2013 at 4:05 pm: So, I’m a horrible person, I don’t even own a copy yet :/
17 Leigh March 14, 2013 at 4:05 pm: That is awesome – congrats!
18 Julia Grace March 14, 2013 at 4:05 pm: Congrats!!!! I can just imagine you making that sound too.

As for the giveaway…. I reallllllly want a signed copy because I want to read that extra chapter…… gah! I must read it!
Julia Grace recently posted..Starry Sky Whale
19 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 4:05 pm: That is a beautiful sea of people. And you brought them all together. Wow.
20 George Abbott March 14, 2013 at 4:05 pm: I’m impressed at the number of guys in the audience! They looked like they had their heads on straight, but it’s hard to tell. Abd what are the chances of the first comment winning? But I’m an optimist. Enjoy the fandoration!
21 Tracey March 14, 2013 at 4:05 pm: I haven’t been able to find a copy in Australia and I’ll understand if you don’t want to post one to me all the way down here but I would LOVE to get a copy! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?
Tracey recently posted..Brave
22 TWBiotch March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: the bf thinks two copies of the same book is silly. help me prove him wrong. besides – he laughed just as hard as i did when i read him some excerpts!
23 Richard March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: Mmm… new version…
24 ReneeR March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: So wish I could be there to see you. Well done you!!
25 Amber March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: I loved your book but I had the E-Book version. Congratulations, you deserve it and so much more for bring laughter in the world.
26 Paul Fisher March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: Your book is so awesome….I loved listening to it!
27 Jan Cooper March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: I can’t wait to read your new book. Please pick me!
28 Heather H March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: You deserve it, Jenny.

Your book is amazing and REAL. Plus, DAMN hilarious.

I’d love a copy of the paperback so I can read the new chapter.
29 MizWeirdo March 14, 2013 at 4:06 pm: I’m so envious of everyone who gets to come see you! I wish I lived closer to where you tour (or that you’d come tour in Canada…!)
Oh well, I’m used to living vicariously through others!
30 Carrie March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: Congrats! You are AWESOME and deserve it!

I hope I win cuz I couldn’t figure out how to get the kindle version autographed–especially since I don’t live close to ANY of the places you are visiting!
31 Melissa March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: Would loved a signed copy of the BEST BOOK EVER!!!!!
32 Pedes March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: All the happy faces
33 dANA March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: wow. i totally need a new coaster. however did you know?
34 Vanessa Luna March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: I want a copy! I don’t own your book yet, I couldn’t afford it when you came into Denver, but I did see you speak!
35 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: YAY! Congrats.
36 Alannah March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: Dying to read the new chapter!
37 Mama K March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: Congrats! You are awesome!
38 Sam March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: Woohoo!! Me, me, me!
39 Cynthia March 14, 2013 at 4:07 pm: EEEEEEEE I want an autographed copy of your awesome book!
40 Noor March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Pick me! I really want your book. Was gonna buy it today but it was sold out
41 Kris R March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Congratulations …. I’m so happy for you!
42 Erica March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Loved the book but being poor means I checked it out from the library xoxo Have a great tour!
Erica recently posted.."Honest victories over desperation" – Thomas Merton
43 Jenny Hough March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: A whole new chapter? Holy smokes, I sure hope you pick me!
44 Adi March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: MEEEEE! Please. <3
45 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: I’ll take it! You can just give it to me when I see you in KC next week;)
46 Laura March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: That’s me! Waaaaaay in the back.
47 Ruby March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Congrats! You are an inspiration…and a bad influence. And have a sailor’s mouth. But that is why we love ya!
48 Lin March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Ooh…I want one!
Lin recently posted..Random Thursday: Pet Peeves…
49 Mary Anne March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Still sad that you aren’t coming to Boston
Happy that the book is doing well
Would love to have the paperback to get the extra chapter!!!
50 Dianimal March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: It’s my time… I have a friend who just had a mastectomy and this would be a great pressie… X’ed fingers for me….
51 Margie March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Woo, wanted to see you in Chicago, but no money for gas! Pick me for the drawing please!
52 Morgan March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: I just bought the audio book – which is Amazing! But I would LOVE an autographed book I missed your St.Louis signing because I moved to Chicago the week before. Too bad your signing wasn’t a week earlier!
53 Megan March 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm: Dont pick me. (but do)
54 Jessie B March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Insert interesting, attention-grabbing comment here. My baby is teething, and I’m living on, oh, ZERO SLEEP. I need a paperback copy so that I can re-read your book, and have some sunshine in my life. Or, at least, some laughter.
55 Cassie March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I sadly missed you on your last tour when you came to Seattle, but I’d love a copy of the paperback. Congratulations on your success!
56 Aly W March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Wish I could see you in in person but I would do with a paperback instead
57 Heather March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Congratulations!
58 Jessica M. March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I would LOVE a signed copy to go with my digital copy! Wish you were going to be near me.
59 Renar March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Gosh, good work!
I’m sad you aren’t able to do a book your in Sydney, and I’m too broke to follow you around on your US tour.
Life is too difficult.
60 Kim March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm
61 Ugogurl March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Awesome! Congrats I would love one
62 Mary V March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: You’re awesome and deserve the top spot! Congrats for #5
63 Amanda Meyer March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Pick me! Pick me! Pick me! I want to complete the Let’s Pretend This Never Happened trifecta! I own the hardcover and the ebook.

Also please consider touring in Canada because we love you here too!!
64 xtine March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: ooh pick me! i’d loooove an autographed copy!
65 Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Congratulations! I need to read me that extra chapter. Gonna need to head to the book store…
Carrie – Cannibalistic Nerd recently posted..Super Friends Season 2, Episode 10 – “Alaska Peril”
66 Ashley March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I would love to win. It’s as close as I would get to you ever coming to my neck of the woods in Canada.
67 Tracy Egan March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I would buy this book for the cover alone…. but then, that would be judging, wouldn’t it?
68 Shandle March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Pick me! I met you in Miami and you told me not to divorce my husband even if he doesn’t get me a giant metal chicken. I’m also an active member of Allie Brosh’s forum, which I totally think you should join and come play with us!
69 Rikke H March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I think the new chapter will be worth buying the book again.
70 Mitzi March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I don’t have a copy and I would love one signed!
71 Rose March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Yay!
72 Kate March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Me!

I have the hardbound version already, but OOOH!
73 Barbara Miller March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: Ooohhh…hope I win
74 Jeff March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I would love to have a copy of your book. I wish I could come to a signing…
75 Missy Q. March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: OOH. Signed! I would like a copy. If I don’t, I will go ahead and buy it. IF I HAVE TO GOSH.
76 Kerry March 14, 2013 at 4:09 pm: I’d read the new chapter carefully so it will look new when I give it my (unoffendable–usually a very good thing) dear friend Ali.
77 Meredith March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Congratulations! Can’t wait to read it. And thanks for all you do for all of us by sharing your story!!
78 Patti March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Jenny, you are an inspiration to us all, or to most of us, or maybe just some of us. Anyhow, to me. Congratulations. (And I’d love an autographed copy of the book. Seriously, I’d cherish it.)
79 Kylie March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Love your writing, your book, and your attitude. Congratulations on all your success!

(And get your butt up to Canada, would you? I promise there’s more to the country than Toronto! )
80 Tymbre Joy March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: awesome! throwing my hat in the ring now
81 Sue March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Um, I actually do use reactions to the Beyonce post to judge people I send it to (and whether they laugh when I occasionally post “Knock, knock, motherfucker” on facebook). It’s amazing how proud I am of someone I don’t actually know, but I am of you. Immensely.
82 Julie March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: I love people who smell like cupcakes and magnificence. I’ve found a lot of just cupcakes, and a few magnificents, but it’s especially rewarding (and unusual) to find a combination of the two. All the best to you!
83 Maggie March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: I would LOVE to own a copy of your paperback book. My husband and I love relating to you and Victor!! Congratuations Jenny!
84 Deanna March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Congratulations! I am new to your Blog and enjoying it. You crack me up!

PS: I’d love a copy!
85 Sue W March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: You rule Jenny. I would see you if you came to Minnesota….come see ME???
86 Deanne March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Love your work and would love a signed copy!
87 Megan March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Me please!
88 KellyR March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: I would be ever so thankful if you picked me!!
89 Susie March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Me!!!
90 Amber March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: You deserve every single wonderful thing that happens to you! I adore you.
91 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: omg please pick me! you are the voice inside my head but real.
92 Wendy March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: I *neeeeeeed* a copy of your book, because I have it on my Nook, which means I don’t get to display it in its awesomeness in our home library!

(Also, I am enormously excited for you – #5! Sweet!)
Wendy recently posted..Geeks & Princesses
93 julia March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Me me me! I would love it! (And congrats!)
94 Lisa Koch-Hulle March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Congratulations! I love that the crowd smelled like cupcakes AND magnificence. Have to admit I always assumed those two things would smell the same.
95 Scott March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: Congratulations! So well deserved! Wish I could have come to see you in person.
96 Leslie March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: I would so love a paperback copy, I ~must~ read the new chapter. I won’t get to see you this time around (you aren’t coming close enough this time) so I will have to wait till book 2 tours to bring you jello shots and love.
97 Pete Carney March 14, 2013 at 4:10 pm: This is my favorite tribe. Thanks for letting us be a part.
98 Darcie March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Bought myself a copy for my birthday in October and have loaned it out so much it is in bad shape. A signed copy wouldn’t be a bad replacement. Congrats!
99 Judy Sucevic March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: I need one! I lent my copy to someone, and they lent it to someone… ugh.
100 Jilly March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Pick me! Pick me! – from Shrek
101 Mary March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: a copy i could smell, says she who bought it on her kindle.
Mary recently posted..Kirkland Sonoma County Old Vine Zinfandel
102 Cait March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Is that guy in the front row to the extreme left wearing a fuschia tutu?

(It’s red. And he looks FANTASTIC in it. ~ Jenny)
103 Richelle March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Oh Jenny. We couldn’t be happier to have you as a leader of our tribe. You deserve the attention for being so freaking you.
104 Christi March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: I’d just love one!
105 Kimberly R. March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: So excited for you! Congratulations!!
106 Lorrie March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Loved the first book. Will have to get the new one!
107 Angela S March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Is that guy on the left in a red tutu and and Knock Knock MotherFucker t-shirt!??! SWEET!
108 Stephanie the Great March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Me me me me!!! I’ll even make you a deal: if you give me that book, I promise I won’t stalk you to make you my new BFF like I have planned to do since I finished reading your book. (Not that you’re really in danger of me stalking you anyway since I live many highways away from Texas and am very lazy, but I would like this to be an exchange of sorts.)
109 Melissa March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Would love a copy!!!
110 Ellen March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: That is awesome! Congrats!
111 Cindy Paigen March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: me me me!!!! Pick me!
112 Ashley Taylor March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: pick meeeee! And then I will make my new husband read it. And then maybe he will understand me. Probably not.
Ashley Taylor recently posted..Raise the Roof
113 Carmen March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Cupcakes and magnificence. My two favourite smells.

(Congrats!)
Carmen recently posted..That time I went to Vegas. Again
114 Di March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: I love love love rereading your book!! I have it in digital form and would love a paperback to hold and cuddle!!
115 Nicki March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Need to get me this book . . . or you could just give me one . . .
Nicki recently posted..Baking Bread
116 Cynthia Holt March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: I want to read the extra chapter-you made me wet myself the first time around.
Cynthia Holt recently posted..The Gus Project
117 Karen Sanders March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Your book and seeing you in Charlotte, NC last year were two highlights of 2012! I’m recovering from a C-section, but soon I’ll be able to get the paperback version!
Karen Sanders recently posted..New beginnings
118 Angela March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: I would love, love, love a signed copy of your book! Heck, I would even love an unsigned copy!(maybe a little less, but it would still be loved!)
119 nikki March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Just found your blog! Cant help but crack a smile when reading your posts….
Thanks!
120 C Vanderwicken March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Aww man…a signed copy?…I’d LOVE it! Be the best damn coaster EVER!
C Vanderwicken recently posted..Thank you!
121 Mindy H. March 14, 2013 at 4:11 pm: Hehehehe… Is the guy on the left wearing a red tutu? Awesome.
122 Tara March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: I’d LOVE your book! My 2 best friends and I have been brought to tears with laughter over your blog! Love it!!
123 Sheila March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: So happy for you…and for us for the extra chapter!
My hardcover copy is autographed…the paperback copy is sad because it isn’t.
124 Brooke March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: It’s awesome to see the turnout. That book really was such a blast to read. I’d love the paperback one so I can sneak it in with my fiance’s books to coax him into reading it. It’s like yummy bookalicious crack.
Brooke recently posted..Yellow Brick Road Recipe
125 Lena Eivy March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Whoo Hooo!
126 Naomi March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Thanks for all you do! I’d love to get another copy of your book since mine seems to be permanently on loan.
127 Shelley March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Pick me!! You need to come to Little Rock, AR. You have many fans!
128 Bethany March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Oh pick me! And you totally need to come to Nashville!!!
129 Lindsey March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Never laughed so hard in my life. One of my absolute faves from last year! Would treasure a copy of my own!
Lindsey recently posted..Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant
130 Vicki Fitch March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Badassness? Done and done. Thanks for always making me laugh until I cry!
131 Brenda March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: I got 2 copies last week but I would love an autographed copy! I also have it on my Kindle so I can read it any where
132 Eric March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: I was amazed how many of my friends said “That book is awesome!” when I started telling them about it. Didn’t even know they were fans. You’re big league now, Jenny.
133 Cherie P March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: I think that to make up to me for not coming to Sacramento, CA on your tour, that you should pick me for an autographed copy of your book!
134 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: You are awesome and I love you!!!
135 Shannon akaMonty March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME! I’m selfish, I want it purely for my own reading pleasure AND it will have a place of honor – I have a shelf JUST FOR internet friends who are authors. There is a space there JUST WAITING FOR THIS BOOK. Think of the prestige I will garner! It might catapult me from mediocrity to SOMEBODY!
Hey, it could happen.
Also I am sad that your book tour does not include Oklahoma.
WHICH IS ANOTHER REASON TO PICK ME. You know how backward the people are here. YOU MUST HELP ME.
136 Tracie March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Glad to see a fellow west Texas girl doing good. Make us proud!
137 Maryanne March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, I would like to read it!
138 Mary-Louise March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Love you and your books!
139 Hearher March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: So very happy for you!
140 Nicole March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: LOVE you and can’t wait to meet you in Louisville! Wish I could take you to dinner at some of the yummy eateries we have. We could do some serious grubbing!
141 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: EEEEEEEEEEEE so happy for you! Thanks for being weird & awesome.
Jessica recently posted..archiemcphee:

From the Department of Awesome Acts of Kindness…
142 Andi March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: Sweet! But I hope the three year old puts down the hamster first
143 Jilly March 14, 2013 at 4:12 pm: PS, next time come to Cleveland!
144 Stacey Whitely March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I loved your first book and a few months ago I let a friend borrow it… it was never seen again… so I will be buying a paperback so I can talk her into giving me mine back… but I am totally going to read the extra chapter before I give it to her… cuz thats how I roll..
145 Jenna March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: #5 on the NYT!! Way to Go!! I’d come see you again but you’re not anywhere close to me this time and i no has teh monies to fly to you sad face.
If the humor gods decided I should be graced with your book i’m keeping the signed one and giving the other one I have to my bff who only just started reading your blog and is just starting to understand the awesomeness that is you.
146 Lalizzy March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Congrats! And I would love another copy of your book. I wouldn’t even use it as a coaster. I’ll just make all my friends read it once I have read the new chapter!
147 MJ March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Just found you a little bit ago and am spreading your news to deserving folks! Wish I could have met you when you met a friend of mine in Chicago recently. A bit too far away from me, though.
148 theyamqueen March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I saw you when you were in Seattle and since you won’t be back around here, I just strong-armed my friends and family in the Louisville/Cincinnati area to go see you. My guess is they will go and be completely baffled and maybe even yell at me because CURSING, but you know. Fighting the good fight and all.
149 Sheri March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: So thrilled the tour is going well.
Please please please pick me!
150 Angela March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I so wish you were coming near Richmond, VA. I would love to meet you. You have reduced me to hysterical tears more times than I can count – especially listening to the audiobook in a public place! (obviously, I used earbuds!)
151 andrea March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: PICK ME!
152 Marion March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I’m with Sue W – come to Minnesota! (Oh wait…..we’re nice here….. come here PLEASE? )
153 Steph March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Can’t wait to see you in San Jose!!!
Counting down the days!
154 Sharah March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Me! Me! Pick me!
155 Jesse March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Jenny you rock! You have given me the strength to get help
156 Liz March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I have so many friends who need to be introduced to your humor
Liz recently posted..The solution for kids with skinny butts
157 Jennifer Taylor March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Congrats Jenny! Totally love your blog and your book!
Jennifer Taylor recently posted..Geek and Sundry Tabletop Contest!
158 Heidi Brady March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Oooooo, me me ME!!! PICK ME!!!!
159 Tina T. March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Would love a copy of the book!!
160 Rachel March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I have a copy of the hardback, but I’d love a paperback copy for the new chapter! As an AmeriCorps volunteer I can’t really afford it, but I may buy one anyway. I only wish I lived somewhere I could see you on tour.
161 Tubaville March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: I would LOVE a copy of your book. I am poor so I got it out of the library and just read it recently. I am still laughing about stuff from your book even now.

I am so looking forward to your next book about your anxiety disorder since I have that amongst other fun things.
Tubaville recently posted..Struggling
162 Leigh March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Congrats, and thanks for all the laughs!
163 Trina L. March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Great news! I loved reading your book on my nook, would love a copy in paperback!
164 Christy March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: You need to come to Anchorage on your book tour! That would be awesome
165 Lorelei668 March 14, 2013 at 4:13 pm: Fantastic, Jenny! Congrats to you and thanks for all you do!
166 Donna March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Congrats! Amazing achievement! You know you had me at Big Metal Chicken
167 Danielle Hoekstra March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: I’m in Canada but please pick me!
168 Dasku March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: I’d love to have a signed copy!
(that is, if you’d you ship internationally for those of us too far away to go see you on tour. Or come to Spain. Either would work )
169 Erin March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Tonight is frozen pizza night!
170 Kathleen March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Oh! I’d love an autographed copy of your book. Pick me!
Kathleen recently posted..New Kitchen Light
171 Linda Jones March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Happy to be bizarre. Please pick me.
Linda Jones recently posted..The Traveling Red Coat
172 Natalie March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Sigh. I am seriously considering skipping class next week to meet you when you ome to Cincinnati. It’s my favorite class, too.
173 kristi March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: If I don’t win, I’m buying another copy to give my newest friend. You are right ~ I need to know how easily offended she is!
174 The Hook March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Credit should go to your amazing, yet incredibly twisted – in a good way – family, Doctor Who, and of course, the Little Bloggess and Victor.
Savor the flavor of victory, Jenny; God knows you’ve earned it.
175 Elizabeth March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Pick me! I have the Kindle book, but can’t spring for the second copy . And I’d LOVE to read the new chapter!!
176 Kristie C March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: Me me me!!! I had you sign my child ..that is probably like us being married in some countries.
Kristie C recently posted..Science is Real!
177 Sskipstress March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: If you send me a copy of your book, it’ll be entirely your fault that I stayed up all night reading it.
178 Emily March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: You’re proof there’s hope for all of us who don’t quite fit. Good job you, everything you have is well-earned!
179 Christine March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: I would love a paperback copy since my mother stole my hardcover copy on a plane ride from Virginia to Oregon in January and I haven’t seen it since. She laughed out loud to the point of snorting and embarrassment on every leg of our flight.
180 Wendy A F G Stengel March 14, 2013 at 4:14 pm: I keep buying your book and giving it to others, and yet…I’ve never read it! I do not have my own copy!
Wendy A F G Stengel recently posted..Portland Punches: Selections from Portland Women’s Exchange
181 Jaedeanne March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Congratulations! Can’t wait to read your book!
182 Krud March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Yay, I’m in this picture! You just can’t see me, ’cause I was way in the back, behind other people, and didn’t actually get there until several minutes after this picture was taken. Oh, wait…
183 Mary, QoE March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: That’s a lot of happy people! Congrats on your richly-deserved success! If you weren’t so awesome (and a good writer), it wouldn’t have happened, so YAY, you!!
Mary, QoE recently posted..If it’s Monday, I must be home. . . .
184 Marcela March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: You are awesome! My coworkers and I have been pimping your book(as my friend jenny says)! I have purchased it three times…twice as gifts! I think the gift receivers like me a little better now. So hey thanx for writing…. best of luck!
185 Jenn March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Congratulations on the NYT list! More than well deserved.
186 frabjouslinz March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: That is so cool. You completely deserve it. And your/our tribe is really great. When I went to your booksigning at Costco here in Seattle last August, everyone was so nice in line. I was still nervous, and I think I babbled to you for a minute about it being my birthday, and you smiled and were nice, too. I didn’t have enough courage to stick around, but it was still the nicest standing around in Costco I’ve ever had. Plus I got your book for myself as a bday present. So, there’s that. Congrats on NYT list again!
187 Johana March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: I just moved from CA to WA and after 3 months, I finally made a friend. And I would love to share your book with her! Pick me!

P.S. thanks for wishing my cousin an early happy birthday on twitter last month, he really needed it
188 Crash March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: This is awesome! Congrats on #5. Super psyched for you and STILL MAD YOUR PAPERBACK TOUR DOESN’T COME ANYWHERE NEAR DC.
189 Anastasia March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Would love to share your book with my therapist! I reference it weekly. You deserve all this great support.
190 Liz March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: I want to go to there! Also I’m dying for a copy of your book! I should buy one so that you get money for your awesomeness (I did buy the audio book, does that count?), but I’m a poor lowly grad student. Pick me! #noshame
191 Jenny D. March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: I love you, Jenny! You’re so awesome, that I’ve gotten several friends to read your book too! And they love you! And I’m totally not just saying this so that you might give me a copy of your book!
Jenny D. recently posted..Book Update; entry 3
192 adam Dishkin March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Me because I’m your #1 gay fan, and I WILL spread the word. LoveLoveLove
193 Katie March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: I wish you were going to be near Fort Collins, Colorado!
Katie recently posted..Mother Finds Diet List On 7-Year-Old’s Floor
194 Elena March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: I would love a copy! Thanks!
195 kayte March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: pick me pick me!
please?
196 Shelly March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Use it as a coaster?!? Heavens no!!! Such literary genius must NEVER be abused in such a manner!!!
197 Erin March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Woot woot!
198 Brandy March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Congratulations! My husband and I are hoping to see you when you come to CA!
199 Xopher March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: I’ve wanted one of your books so badly, I just haven’t been able to afford one yet!
Xopher recently posted..Cheap refreshing drinks that are not packaged in crystal form.
200 Michele March 14, 2013 at 4:15 pm: Congratulations! Very exciting!
201 LuAnn March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Congratulations on the book! Pick me!!!
202 redheadedblonde March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Awww. I’m giving a copy of your book to a friend of mine who’s 6 weeks away from having her first baby (alone) while dealing with her mom’s terminal cancer (she needs as much laughter as possible). But – I’m planning on buying it for her anyway to tuck into her hospital bag – so please pick someone else who can’t buy one. Just wanted to let you know that your book will bring much-needed joy to a (very sweet) stranger!
203 Athena March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Congrats!!!
204 Lisa S. March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: That is awesome! Go you! (Also, pick me, pick me, pick me! Maybe? Please?)
205 Steph March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Me! I listened to your audiobook but would loooooooove to see your printed words. And bonus chapter. And I want to display Hamlet von Schnitzel as a faceout on my bookshelf for all eternity!
206 Caitlin March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: I would love a copy! <3
207 Shea March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: I never win anything, but this could change the course of my luck forever. Pick me, pick me!
208 Adriana Contreras March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Hell yes Jenny!! I wish you were coming somewhere close to southern New Mexico, but I can live vicariously through the awesome people that get to go see you
209 Ann March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: CONGRATULATIONS! You deserve it.:)
210 Audrey March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: I loved your book and can’t wait to read the bonus chapter!
211 DJ March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Even though I have read it before, I am excited to read your book on my upcoming 10 hour flight to Poland! It’s one of the few things that is going to keep me sane.
212 Angelmine March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Come to Raleigh, NC! I’ll be there! loved loved loved ur book, cant wait for more!
213 Whimsy March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: You’re amazing! Thanks for sharing your journey…the best is yet to come.
214 Anouck March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: Well, I read the hardcover about 4 times already, so I think I TOTALLY deserve to get the signed paperback version with the bonus chapter.

Oh, and you rock. Seriously. ROCK…MY…SOCKS.
215 Tara Robinson March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: You totally deserve this, Jenny! Thanks for being you. Huggles.
Tara Robinson recently posted..Royal Weddings Need More Meth…
216 Kari March 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm: I already bought the hardcover, and the kindle version, AND the paperback but if you pick me, I promise to give my unsigned paperback to someone who hasn’t read the book because I CANNOT LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO HAVEN’T READ THIS BOOK.
Kari recently posted..To Pee or Not to Pee
217 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: I NEED a copy!!!! We are having a money-saving March and this book being dangled in front of me is dangerously close to throwing me off my money-saving mission this month (I would hate to be a failure:)
218 Beckie March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Is it creepy that I want to win just so I can have something you touched? A little? Well, then I want to win because you’re not coming to the City of Salt so I’m probably not going to be able to see you in person… We’ll go with that.

Beckie recently posted..It’s weird when profound shit happens to me on facebook.
219 jennifer korfiatis March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Me! Me! Me!
220 Alison March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Ooooo MEEEEE! I bought the original on Kindle and can’t see the pics very well. Need hard copy! And PS, I like your cats.
221 DeAnna Willis March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: help me offend people.
222 Meghan March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Me please!!
223 Nicole Thomas March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Congratulations on your success!
224 Annie March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: I was there! I don’t need to win a copy, I’m just super excited to see a pic of the even I WAS AT! (please come to Anchorage, AK. I’d totally be at the signing [again].)
225 Caroline Burau March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Someday I will make a friend. And when I do, I want to give the poor soul your book. Because he, she or it is going to need something to live for. Please give me a book. I can be more pathetic if you need me to be. I can be SO PATHETIC.
Caroline Burau recently posted..“When I legislate about you, I touch myself.”
226 Colleen Mullaney March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Curious about the added chapter for sure!
227 Brandy March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Pick me!! please?!
228 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Best Book EVER!!
229 Natasha March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Such a great book that I convinced the library to get it in for me!
230 Shana March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: PLEASE PLEASE pick me!! Why? Because I can’t get to any of your tour stops to have you sign one in person.

Like Crash, I’m super disappointed your paperback book tour doesn’t include a stop anywhere near Washington DC. ::insert EPIC SAD FACE::
Shana recently posted..Management balancing act
231 Christi March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Please point your picker at me.
232 Isis Reed March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Your book made me laugh so hard I cried. You really new to come to Austin! !!
233 Amy March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Pick me! I spread the love international styles!! And I can’t buy the paperback yet because I’m sure the Euros haven’t legalised (oh yes, that’s how we spell it) it yet!!! I’ve shared the love and promize (that’s not real) to continue to do so! Hug me.
234 beth March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: I would love an actual copy of your book. I downloaded it on my kindle and read it this week and I have to say that I knew you had a few issues based on your blog but reading your book really made me understand you better. It made me laugh to the point of tears at times but it also really spoke to me. I could relate to so much of what you said about what you deal with. Especially a lot of the stuff about your school years. I loved the stuff about you and Victors relationship because as fucked up as I am it gave me hope that someday I might meet a guy who will accept me for who I am and love me despite all my crap. One part that I really connected with was the part about your first pregnancy, it made me cry because of the memories it brought up. Thank you for writing your book and sharing yourself like that. And thank you for showing me that being me is ok, that my issues arent things I need to apologize for, and that people can love you not despite them but because of them. You rock!
235 Coralyn March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Pick me pick me!!
236 Maryrose March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: I would love one – I was going to come to your tour stop in Cincinnati next week, but I just started a new job this week…and now I have to work next Wednesday evening….
237 Greyblue_eyes March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: Yay Jenny! One of these days, I would love to see you on Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. He’s the perfect person to interview you since he’s a bit out there himself. That would be so awesome I think my head would explode.
238 vonneybeth March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: I wish you would come to Tulsa, but I probably couldn’t come anyway due to anxiety and chemical sensitivity. I bought a copy for my mom and it’ll smell like goats and chickens so I can’t borrow hers, so still I wait…
239 Anne March 14, 2013 at 4:17 pm: That’s so awesome!! You totally deserve it!
Anne recently posted..WIP Wednesday
240 Stacey March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Congratulations!! I laughed my way through the book the first time, and it’s let me bond with a few friends over our previously undisclosed fears and anxieties. Thanks for making the world a little weirder.
241 Kerry March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: You rock. That is all.
242 Courtney G March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: WooHoo!!!!!! Awesome news!!!!!!!!!!
243 Erika March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: I bought your book a couple weeks ago, thinking I was going to save it to read in the hospital when I had my 4th baby. Problem is that I started reading it sooner and couldn’t put it down – so much fun to read! Then, I shared with my husband and mother-in-law. Great job!
244 Carolina March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: You’re not just part of the tribe. You’re the leader!!
245 Maria March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: I need that paperback, and also a hamster that won’t cry even if I squeeze him tight. Please pick me.
246 Mindy March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: IS THAT GUY IN THE FRONT ROW WEARING A TUTU?!?! (Please say yes. Please say yes. Please say yes.)
Mindy recently posted..4/23/2012
247 Heidi March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Holy cow. I just moved and when you come to Danville, CA in April, you are only going to be an hour from my house. This must be fate.
Heidi recently posted..Lesson # 56: Kids Are Costly
248 Mikie March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Thank you so much for making horrible days at work so less horrible with your wonderful tales!
249 Karen March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Loved your book ! I’m going to lend my copy to my mom. <3
250 Gerri Willis March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: I hope I win. Regardless I’m coming to see you in Louisville — and bringing a gift!
251 wheresmyweasel March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: I feel misled by the term “new book”! I got unnecessary aroused and then incredibly disappointed when the new book turned out to be the old book! therefore I’d like to win a signed copy of the old book since new one doesn’t exist. Also the book that I purchased long time ago is not signed. I’d like a signed copy so I can sniff it occasionally. Thank you. Also, my cat died.
wheresmyweasel recently posted..In case you didn’t know…chewing cat hair is relaxing!
252 Jen March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Pick me!! Is this where I tell you my sob story that our house flooded and we’re staying in a hotel so could totally use some good luck?!?
253 KayLa March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
254 Leslie Ross March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Ack! I want a signed copy! Pick me!
255 Katie M. March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: I would love a copy!
256 LizA March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Saw the book last weekend at Sam’s Club. If they hadn’t raked me over for the cost of a new membership, it would have ended up in my basket. Rather than test Assets Protection, won’t you pick me (and save me the cost of bail)?
257 Nicole March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Ooh, I’d love a signed copy. Closest spot on your tour was NY and I couldn’t get up there on a weeknight!
258 Larry March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Looks like a great crowd!
259 Jen Nichols March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Waaaaaahooooooo!!
260 Tami March 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm: Ooooh, ooooh PICK ME! PICK ME!! I was a little sad that your east coast leg didn’t include Philadelphia. (I swear we read here.) How can I not have a signed copy considering we’re such close Twitter friends?
261 Monica March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I just discovered last night that a good friend lost her copy to a dog before she was able to read it, and she doesn’t want to risk my copy near the dog. So yes, I am using the excuse that “the dog ate it” as my reason for wanting to win a free one!
262 Kethryvis March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: i’m coming to see you in San Jose! But i’d love to win a copy anyway! Then you can sign it twice! Wait! That’s not enticing you, is it?
263 Jamie Z March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Gratz! I’d love to read that bonus chapter, maybe you’ll pick me?
264 Kellie March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: *Totally would love a Copy of the Paperback copy with another chapter of Bloggess FUN! * Please!! Safe and Happy book signing/talking trails to you…!!!
265 kelly king March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: OMG! I would love a signed copy. Never read a book that made me laugh so hard!
266 Alfredo Lorente March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: We may have done it, but you got it started.

Also, if I don’t get a signed book, can I get a dead mouse? Stuffed, please.
267 Emily March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I will forgive you for skipping Indiana AGAIN if you give me a copy of your book. Love you!!
268 Jayme Johnson March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Pick me too!!!
269 sarawr March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Meeeeeeee OMG me.
270 Megan the Librarian March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Ooh! Pick me! Pick me!
271 Carey March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I MUST be the biggest loser because i havent read your book yet. BUt I insist I’m a huge fan, who has exposed you to many of my friends who HAVE bought said book.

so, that counts for something. nothing.
272 Cheryl M March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I would frame the crap out of that autograph! Or shellac it on a trophy!

Plus I have been meaning to buy the book but I get hella distracted. Usually because I wind up commenting on blog posts and then forgetting what I was doing….
273 Dr Forrest March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I’m new to twitter and just building my follow list. I entered “the boogers” but “the bloggress” was listed. If I read your book, will you teach me about boogers?
274 Static March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I would like this please, thank you. Congrats on the tour and success of of the book! Yay!
Static recently posted..MADE TO ORDER Grumpy Neko Keychain Charm Plush – black & white cat kitten by SWStitchery
275 Shannon March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I ended up giving away both copies of the hard back I bought cos I figure everyone needs to read it, so I would maybe make excited noises if I won an autographed copy with a bonus chapter
276 Erin Mason March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Go you, on your tour Doing the really scary stuff makes other stuff seem less scary. So we’ll all be scared together….. That sounded more motivating in my head….
Erin Mason recently posted..Something For The “Weekend”
277 Anna March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Can I have a signed copy please? I promise to give my other one to a friend in need.*

*Lies. I’m going to play with them like they are dolls and have tea parties with them.
278 Elizabeth K March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: I sadly have not yet read your book. But it’s on hold at the library, and I’ll probably have it to read while I’m sitting in a barn waiting for a horse to have a baby next week. It’ll keep me awake, right?
279 Stephanie March 14, 2013 at 4:19 pm: Awesome!! I have a few friends who NEED your book. Although if I won it, I might keep it for myself and give them my current copy.
Stephanie recently posted..Musings
280 Catherine March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: I’m a loyal devoted hanging-on-every-word-you-say fan. I was one of the first to buy the first book. (I back ordered it.) I *totally* want a copy of the second. And frankly, I’ll go out and get one if you don’t pick me. Because I love you. You’re welcome.
281 Pattie March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: Please come to Florida!!!! I will bring all my friends
282 Burns the Fire March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: I was extremely happy to buy the new version in the Chicago airport! Good for you, Jenny, good for us all.
Burns the Fire recently posted..Born to be Wild
283 ami March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: I have 3 kids and haven’t read a book that wasn’t made of cardboard in 10 years!!!! I need it!!!
284 Chrissy March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: Would make my day.
285 Buffina March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: YAY!!
286 Karolina Jasinski March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: Loved your book. Hoping you write another one!
287 Alicia March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: So happy for you! You deserve the love.
288 Jessica B March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: Supah Cool!
289 beth s March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: ooh, pick me please!
290 Lori March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: Oh pick me pick me!!!!
291 Sue March 14, 2013 at 4:20 pm: Oooh! Congratulations! I wish I could have added to that number. Maybe I’ll be one of the lucky random people. That would be awesome
292 mindy March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: If I win, I’ll give my non-autographed copy to an unsuspecting someone…..
293 Annette DiGiacomo March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME! Or not either way I love you and will be buying your book soon except that you aren’t coming to New Mexico which makes me a little bit sad…
Annette DiGiacomo recently posted..My return….
294 Emily March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: Everyone should read this! I’ve already passed along my copy.
Emily recently posted..delicious smoothie recipe with kale
295 Laura March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: There is a bonus chapter!!!??? Pick me!
296 wheresmyweasel March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: Cheeseus! 200 comments in 15 minutes! Spammers!
wheresmyweasel recently posted..In case you didn’t know…chewing cat hair is relaxing!
297 Hannah March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: Already have my book. Driving friends/family insane by my constant readings to them. I’m trying to work “Hush, little rabbit” into my daily vernacular.
298 TwinCitiesLynn March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: Oh PLEASE come to Minnesota again, I couldn’t see you the last time because I had something going on, but I promise I will make sure my calendar is empty if you come back again!
299 Susie Lindau (@SusieLindau) March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: I would love a copy! ….closes eyes to visualize being lucky winner…..
Susie Lindau (@SusieLindau) recently posted..When Form Meets Function and Mustaches Win
300 Stephanie March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: This makes me so happy for you. You deserve all of the good things.
301 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: You are so funny! I love reading your stuff.
302 Karyn March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: If I won a signed copy of the paperback, I’d have to keep my original hardcover too – I had Wil Wheaton sign it “This book is funnier than the Bible.” !!!
303 Susan March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: Congratulations! Well deserved. I’m incredibly happy for you!!
304 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: You’re like the shaman of our tribe, Jenny! Seriously… you’re made of magic.
Kelly recently posted..Fractal No. 936
305 Christina shelby March 14, 2013 at 4:21 pm: I literally just pulled over to beg for a freebie lol
Hey! They said dont text and drive. There was nothing about reading and driving!
306 Jamie March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: YAYAYAY I had so much fun at your St. Louis reading !!!!
307 Lanine March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: I need your book so I can read it!! I’m also on terminal hold with my local library.
308 Nancy D March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: Saw you in Annapolis last summer. My signed metal chicken occupies a place of honor in my home!
309 Lynn March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: If I beg enough will you add Little Rock, AR to your book tour? Please? Pretty please. Also, if love to win a copy of your book. Every time I get mine back from a friend I have to loan it to the next person on my list. Which is actually awesome.
310 Tam March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: I’ve made everyone I know read your book, and the last person I loaned it to kept it. I would love a new copy!
Tam recently posted..Oh, it’s Christmas!
311 jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: Ooo please pick me!! I’m canadian I don’t get to see you on tour and I don’t think we are privy to the bonus chapter in the paperback version…I have the hardcover…LOVE THIS BOOK. would really really like to get that bonus chapter.
312 Karen March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: Just a thank you to you. Because you help me see each and every day that depression lies and that I do have the strength to survive.
313 Arden March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: That’s great! Congrats Can’t wait to read it!
314 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: OMG I loved you book to bits. I read most of it during a bad down swing of depression and it had me cracking up and literally LOLing through most of it. I stopped a couple of times just to make it last longer but I just flew through it anyways. I’m dying to read the new chapter when I can snag a copy. You are an amazing person and have been a great inspiration for me as I’ve wandered around the roads of depression and chronic anxiety. Much <3 to you you amzaing wonderful woman and you family!
315 Anita Wright March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: I would read the extra chapter then frame it and place it in pride of place next to an ethically taxidermied Australian bush creature (likely a Quoll)
316 Anonymous March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: Okay, just leave a comment…that’s all I have to do. Relatively simple, normal thing most humans don’t have a problem doing.
I think strapless bras are equal to the crotchless underwear, kinda feel naked but you’re not.
There…a statement.
Oh shit, was it supposed to be a comment about the book?
317 Betty Fernau March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: I like sloths.
318 Kimberly E March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: I can’t wait to be in that crowd! See you next week! Of course it won’t be THAT crowd. Mine will have a unicorn head in it.
319 Carolyn March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: Me me me!!! I have a broken foot and crutches. I’ll go for the pity vote.
320 CindyO March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: Beyonce promised me a book I am sure you will help him keep his word….I love your blog…you crack me up and I would love to have a copy of your book…congrats on being #5 on the list…grovel..grovel…grovel
321 Eric March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: It would be handy to have an extra copy, as I keep foisting the first one off on friends! Wish you were coming close enough for me to see you in person, but I’ll have to live vicariously through your blog. XOXO
322 susan hughes March 14, 2013 at 4:22 pm: me, me, me, me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
323 Heather March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: me, me, me! Pretty please?
324 iennydecki March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: I didn’t have a car, or a sittet, or my pills to come see you in Chicago-ish. Is live to win a signed copy so I can lie and tell people it was a magical panic elixir and no I won’t share and buy your own. What a twisted marketing suggestion. Save me. With your book.
iennydecki recently posted..Sacrifices Sometimes Make Me Feel Like A Horrible Mother
325 Kim March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: Love the book!!! Congrats on being #5!
326 purplepenguin March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: I wish we could have seen you. My father-in-law was visiting when you where in NJ, ans we couldn’t make it. Last tour, you were nearby and dh was working, so we c ouln’t come. I would love a copy so I could share you with my kids and said father-in-law!
327 Shelly March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: Hoping some day you’ll visit Western New York!
328 Tracy March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: Congrats on #5! Can’t wait to see you hit #1. I re-read it on my kindle whenever I need a laugh to remind me that my own life really isn’t so crazy.
329 Beckey March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: PICK ME!!!!!!! Please.
330 Casey March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: I totally want that book! Congrats on all your success!
331 Benjamin Venable March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: We’d love to see you in Portland again! Hope you’re having a good time – you deserve it.
332 Veronica March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PICK ME PICK ME!!! I have a hardback copy and so does my mother (she has become a HUGE fan since I gave it to her), but I need an autographed copy! Sad that you’re not coming to Houston since I missed your first tour but happy that it’s going so well for you!!!
333 Mandi March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: I have no less than three new friends that require testing!!
334 Lauren L March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: I was feeling yucky the day of your event in NYC and so so bummed that I had to miss you. Next time, k?
335 Svaha March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: Congrats on being you!
336 Robin March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: I need it so I can make my husband read it! He has a fear of my iPad for reading. And you’re not going to come anywhere near my city
337 Andrea March 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm: Now I kinda wanna squeeze a hamster… no worries – I’m already medicated.

I have your ebook, but could really use a coaster.
338 Anonymous March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: Ooooh! Pick me! Pick me!!
339 Aerik March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: New reader, I’d love to read the book!
340 Emily March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: Pick me! Pick me! I have a digital copy of your book, but I wish I had a hard copy so I could share it
341 Karin March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: Winning this would be the perfect trifecta of awesome. We met Wil Wheaton at Disney on Tuesday (super awesome), lost my wallet at the Magic Kingdom on Wednesday (not awesome) – it was found and returned to me on Thursday (super awesome), and now the only missing part is an autographed copy of your book + bonus chapter!
342 MsDarkstar March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: I have not purchased the new paperback version due to my whole no job/no money situation, but as soon as I get a job I want so much to get a copy of the paperback version to read in the tub… I’d take my hardcover copy but I worry that I’ll laugh so hard that I’ll get bathwater all over it and since it’s the copy that you autographed at the same time you autographed my chestal area (thank you again for that!) I don’t really want bathwater all over it. Plus, it’d be easier to put a paperback copy into a ziplock bag for reading in the tub.

I’m sad you’re not coming back to Dallas but hope our paths eventually cross again. I still think about how awesome it was to meet the tribe that came out in Dallas (including Lisa G… that was a HUGE bonus)!
MsDarkstar recently posted..An Interview with an Author
343 Karin March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: Eeeeeeeeee pick meeeeeeeee!
344 Deborah Tucker March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: I have an ebook copy of your book…would love to have a copy of the paperback version.
345 Dan March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: We are reading your book in the Methodist Book Club, but you don’t sound very Methodist to me.
346 Louren Wolford March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: #5! I’m so happy for you! I have the kindle version so having an actual copy would be AMAZING!
347 Brenna March 14, 2013 at 4:24 pm: This is so awesome, Jenny! YOU are so awesome! It’s your amazing-ness that attracts cool and awesome people. I hope to win a copy of the new version of the book (after buying three of the hardcover), but if I don’t, I imagine I’ll have to buy another one. I can’t let that chapter go unread!
Brenna recently posted..The party scene
348 Kathleen March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I already have two hardback copies, one that my sister had you sign for me in Tempe and one I pre-ordered last year. If you’ll come to Vegas I’ll buy a paperback copy just so I can meet you and have you sign that one as well. Or you could randomly choose me to get one of the five copies and then come to Vegas to sign it!

It’s win-win!
349 Heather March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Random. Schmandom. Pick me. =)
350 Kimberly Burnette March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I REALLY need that book. Don’t leave me hanging wondering about that bonus chapter!
351 Mindy March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I’m sad you’re not coming to Los Angeles on your tour, so winning an autographed book would certainly make me feel better.
Mindy recently posted..Honeymoon Planning – Heraklion, Crete, Greece
352 Catherine Warden March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Ohhh, I want to go to one of your book signings so badly! Come to the east coast PA/NJ region!
Would love to get an autographed copy.
353 Sue March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Ooooh, pick me, please!
354 AjBink March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Pick me! Pick me!
355 Amanda Cruz March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I would love a copy! I so wish you were coming to the Dallas, TX area! Good luck on the next leg of your tour!
356 Mari March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I want ittttttt!!
357 Bellis87 March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: That would be a fantastic consolation prize since none of the book tour stops were close enough for me to get to…. You deserve all the fantastic praise. We are lucky to be a part of your tribe as well.
358 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Pleeeeeeeeeeeease pick me, I so want to read the new chapter!
359 Joyce March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Reading: The best way to fuck reality for a while.

Oh! Ohh!! Ms. Kotter, I need that book! (The other one can go to my awful sister – I got her hand me downs growing up, so she can get my used copy of your book.)
360 Irene March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I seriously would love to have your book. I haven’t been able to afford it, and considering your nearest tour place was several hours away, i’d never be able to get a signed copy.
361 prin March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Yey! Congratulations, Jenny.
362 Angie March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Do you have a list of cities that you will be going to for your signing?
363 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I would squeal like a hamster if I won a copy of your book!
364 Meg Carey March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: I have the book on Kindle, so I could really use a hard copy of the book for any emergency coaster needs around my house. Please pick me!
365 Angel Pedersen March 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm: Thank you for being you!!!
366 Cathy March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: You are an awesome chickadee. Your true-to-self style has been an inspiration to me. Just knowing that I’m not alone has been better than therapy. I read your book and LOVED it. I share quotes and jokes from it, all the time.
Whether or not I’m chosen, you should know that your journey has inspired my journey. I couldn’t be more grateful.
Cathy recently posted..I’m sorry: An open letter to my loved ones
367 Becky March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: Meeting you was totally worth buying the book again (and one for a friend in Iowa)! If you look closely I’m WAAAAAYYYY in the back. To the right. By the creepy dog. In the “enchantment” section. What an awesome evening! Thanks!
368 Wendy March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: Congrats Jenny! I love your book
369 Laurinda March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: Pick me, pick me!!!! Long time follower, first time commenter. Thanks you for being so frank about your anxiety and depression. I was raised in a family where it is unacceptable to talk about your feelings. Since I rarely share with people, I often have felt like there is something wrong with me and I’m the only one like “this” Your book/videos have helped me a lot. One night, I was literally holding back the tears and your book brought me around to laughter.
370 Kathy L March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: OOOOOhhhh!! I’m 1/3 way through the Hardcover(a gift from my hubby for Valentines day!!), but I’d LOVE LOVE LOVE an autographed copy!!

XOXOXOXO
371 PastorC March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: So enjoyed the book, would love another one!
372 Kate March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: Love you forever Jenny!!
373 Jammie C March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: I pre-ordered the kindle version so I dont have an actual book…sure would love to have a “hard copy”! Plus I introduced you to human interactive cat ears so you love me. Pick me! Pick me!
374 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: Pick me
375 Jess March 14, 2013 at 4:26 pm: I would LOVE one when you come to KC
376 HrtOfChclt March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: Wished you were coming to Seattle!
377 Heather March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: Yay!!! Congratulations!!! Best book ever… seriously.
378 Jess March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: Woo!
379 Krianca March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: ::sigh:: Alaska is AGAIN not on your list of tour stops. Thus I need to be one of the lucky 5. To make up for the pain in my weeping, freezing, bear-skinned, polar heart.
380 Kristy March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: I’m so happy for you, Jenny! I would just LOVE a copy of the new paperback book, especially since I wasn’t able to make any of your tour dates in Southern California. Best of luck on the rest of your tour!
381 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: Woo-hoo! Thanks for all the laughs!
382 Chelsey layne March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: [Insert funny comment here with slight cussing that makes you laugh and love me and want to send me a copy of your book]
Chelsey layne recently posted..Show Me What I’m Looking For.
383 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: Pick meeeeeeee, pretty please? With sugar on top? Or maybe a wine slushie?
384 Emily March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: Love the book and you! Go team weird!
385 Joanna March 14, 2013 at 4:27 pm: ME! ME! ME!
Joanna recently posted..Ain’t nobody got time for that!
386 Kylie March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: Just so you know, your reach gets all the way to the other side of the world, I spent much time receiving weird looks when I was reading your book whilst commuting to and from my old job. You know what I totally didn’t care, laughter makes the world go crazy (no sorry that’s no TV and no beer makes Homer…) well I like laughing.
Kylie recently posted..The Dark Deeps
387 DeNae March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: I’d love a copy. We’re reading your book for our book club in a few months, mostly to weed out the people it offends. Not really, but that would be a fun litmus test.
DeNae recently posted..I’m all up here on my pregnancy high horse
388 Jess March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: See, now I have always thought awesome throngs of people that support hilarity and brilliance would smell like cupcakes, magnificence with a hint of dryer sheets.

I guess you learn something new every day!
Jess recently posted..What’s My Super Power? Sticking My Butt Out, Apparently…
389 Lindsey March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: Pick me! Pick me!
Huge chicken fan, right here.
390 Robin March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: Well, I have a copy, but I’d love to give one to my daughter. So pick me!
Robin recently posted..Let’s Master Gardening!
391 Lorena March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: You deserve all this love and MORE!! congrats.
392 JessicaD March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: Please come to Boston … (in the springtime…) A little Joan Baez for you. Fingers crossed for the autographed copy of your book!
393 Marci March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: Oh pick me because I’m lame and haven’t bought the paperback version but still really want to read the bonus chapter
Marci recently posted..Nothing good comes from shaming
394 Tarasview March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: I can’t even tell you how much I wish I lived ANYWHERE near one of your stops… sadly the “MIDDLE OF NOWHERE” northern Ontario, Canada is not one of your stops. But cheers to you Jenny!
Tarasview recently posted..Spring Break Adventures
395 Mel March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: Okay Melissa, just leave a comment she said…I mean how hard can it be? Most relatively normal humans do this all the time.
I think strapless bras are like crotchless underwear but for your boobs. You’re kinda naked but not.
There, a comment.
Oh shit, was the comment supposed to be about the book?
396 Belinda March 14, 2013 at 4:28 pm: I borrowed your book from the library when I read it the first time (I actually forced them to buy it cause I emailed them and said they were severely lacking in books about family who stay together with taxidermy and such) and I got the virgin copy.. Is there anything better than a virgin book from the library? It gave me a bit of a lady boner. But I’m glad that now others who patron my library can shoot Pepsi max out their nose like I did when I read it.
397 Amy March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: I’d love to get a copy of your new book! YOU. ARE. AWESOME.
Amy recently posted..Lampwork Strawberry Earrings by MorningStarArts
398 Janae Powell March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: I bought the iBooks version and am so sad I can’t hold it in my hands and pass around to all my friends!! Would love to win an actual copy
399 Nicole C March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: I loved the book and can’t wait to read the new chapter (double yay if I win ).
400 Amanda D March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: You’re the bomb, Jenny!!!!
401 Carrie March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: Gimme, gimme!! Or I can just wait until you are here in Cinci next week…..either way – win win for me!
402 Jessca March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: Why does no on ever come to NH? Hint Hint
403 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: Congrats chickadee!! And if you ever make it to Shreveport, expect to see me in your front row. (:
404 Melodie March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: *insert something clever here that will make me win*

Just remember, I and my lovely red-headed wonder child headed out in the middle of a haboob and stood in line for hours in Tempe, AZ to see you. I even shared my pictures of the haboob with you. (Is the emotional blackmail working yet??? P-P-P-P-PLLLLEEEASE?? with sugar on top, and a taxidermied something or other)

P.S. You are AWESOME!! (see, flattery is better than blackmail, right? right? maybe?) >_<
405 mediocremomof3severelyaveragekids March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: Pick me! Pick Me! I already have the hardcover, but I’ll share it I promise!
mediocremomof3severelyaveragekids recently posted..Want some sugar on your cereal?
406 LibraryGirl62 March 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm: We are all so proud of you-and we are just along for the ride
407 Sharon M March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: You are awesome!!
408 Galixie March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: I’d been wanting to read your book since it first came out but was a little low on funds so I waited for it to come out in paperback. The timing of the paperback release was perfect because I had a doctor appointment that included a one hour test and I needed something to read while I was waiting. I bought a copy of the book about a week before the test and, to keep myself from reading it (and possibly finishing it) before my appointment, I tied it closed with ribbon. It was like I was opening a much awaited present to myself after being jabbed with needles. Totally worth the wait.
409 Laurel March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: Congrats on the top 5!! I’m so disappointed you won’t be in my area (Ga) this time. Last time you were close I had a giant panic / agoraphobia situation and couldn’t make it. It happens. Please continue to enjoy your tour and be safe! Wave to my family in Los Angeles when you’re there!
410 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: Woohoo – congrats! Would love to win one.
411 Imajustsaying March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: I would LOVE a signed copy of your book.. Or any copy, signed or unsigned for that matter. I am old school and need to feel the spine, count the pages and carefully lick my right pointer finger before the last paragraph of the right page is read while I expertly turning the page without missing a beat.

I have turned this into a fine art form since I was reading avidly since I was in 4th grade. Actually my first favorite book ever read 20 times over in second grade, was “A Fish Out Of Water” and I was hooked ever since. Not only did I understand NOT to overfeed fish, I learned that I would never be that girl who follows directions because people said so and would most likely have the same results at least once and wonder how I would get all the stains out of the carpet after a huge fish came barrelling down my mothers staircase and through the front door.

Now.. back to your book. I promise I will read it, review it and post it on my blog. I SAWEAR!!!!!!

Gratefully yours, an avid reader.
P.S. But not such a good speller
P.S.S. I used to be a good speller and won the spelling bee in 4th grade for the entire school.
P.S.S.S. No the school had more than one 4th grade class. 6 to be exact.
Imajustsaying recently posted..And Now… A Word From Our Sponsor – #PepsiMAX & Jeff Gordon Present: “Test Drive” #TVTIME101
412 Missy lawson March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: I have many unstable friends (including my poor mother) that I feel would benefit greatly from your book. I know I did. I enjoyed meeting you and am so happy for your success. I’m not trying to butter you up (besides, I’m really just going to use it to keep my kitchen table leg even) but its so refreshing to see a very real very kind person deserve such greatness.

Cheers.

Missy
413 MKH March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: Exciting, I’d love to have a copy!
414 Jennifer Jo March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: I’m in Guatemala without Netflix or Redbox and hardly any books to ready, so I really think you ought to pick me. (Pretty please?)
415 Gwyn March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: Winning a copy of your book would give me a second reason to squee like a squooshed hamster this week. (the first being the news that “Sherlock” is not only about to start filming season 3 but is confirmed for a 4th season! SQUEEEEEEE!)
416 Dawnie March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: That was the book signing I went to! (I’m in the third row hiding behind a book.) Thank you so much for coming out on tour and reading for us. If I’m a lucky winner of your book I’ll gladly pass it on to someone who couldn’t make it to your tour, or who couldn’t afford the book which is equally tragic.
Dawnie recently posted..This panic attack walks into a bookstore, and… wait.. that’s not right.
417 Lisa-Marie March 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm: I can’t wait to meet you!! I’ll get to see you in CA, at your stop in Danville! I’m so excited! I would love the paper back version so I can read the new chapter.. I have it in hardback, and for my iPad..
Lisa-Marie recently posted..GREEN!!!
418 Suz March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: How wonderful, Jenny!!! That is such a fantastic accomplishment.
Cheers!
Suz recently posted..We are people, not commodities
419 Tyler Tork March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: ooh me me!
Tyler Tork recently posted..In the spirit of Gripesgiving…
420 Shawn March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: So bummed that you’re coming to Louisville & Cinci on weekdays! I live smack in the middle of the two…unfortunately, I don’t think my boss would understand what I NEED to go see the incredibly funny owner of a giant metal chicken, who happens to be my favorite author…maybe I could tell him I’m meeting with Beyonce’s “manager”?!?!
421 jo hilder March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: Oooohhh!!!! I’d LOVE a copy of your book!
jo hilder recently posted..Breaking The First And Second Rules Of Fight-To-Self-Publish-The-Perfect-Book Club
422 Donna Trulli March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: So happy for you that the paperback is doing so well— but why wouldn’t it, it’s fabulous. Continued success with #2 and I hope 3 and 4. Much love, Donna
423 Devon S March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: I hope I get picked to win! Did I mention my birthday is on St. Patrick’s Day? Early birthday present maybe? Hugs!!!
Devon S recently posted..It’s the little things
424 Lauren B. March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: I just found out about your blog when one of my friends and I were having a conversation about my new roommate who doesn’t like to lock the door. My friend said, “you have to read this post on this blog I follow” and brought up your post about your bear “protection” costume. Fantastic! Wondering if I win the new book if a bear costume can be thrown in or if I can buy one online….
425 Cindy March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: It’s all because you rock… Now it’s only I could get you to visit my tiny town…
426 Ashley March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: Pick Me! Pick Me! Please and thank you.
Ashley recently posted..Boy Runs Into Ex-Girl On Bus…
427 Dee Abbott March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: Pick me & I’ll let you name one of our farm animals anything you want! ANYTHING. YOU. WANT.
428 tjbmurph March 14, 2013 at 4:31 pm: YAY!
429 alice smith March 14, 2013 at 4:32 pm: Would love to have a copy of your book……an avid fan here.
430 Sam March 14, 2013 at 4:32 pm: Yay book! See you in Cincinnati!
431 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 4:32 pm: I friggin LOVE you. I lent my copy of your book to my friend and bitch stole my book!!! I need a new copy.
432 Kirsten March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: Congrats! Very deserved – I love the book and would love a copy!
433 Farrah March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: I’d love an autographed copy!!
434 Randi Skaggs March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: You should pick me because I’m heartbroken I can’t come to see you next week in Louisville. My daughter has a school function I can’t miss.
435 Michele Z. March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: Oh I’d love one. Right now I have a copy that I borrowed from our local library. (I borrowed The Book of Job by Harold Kushner at the same time. That IS odd, no?
436 Victoria March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: Ohhh pick meeeeeee
437 Star March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: You aren’t touring anywhere near me or i would have brought my own tribe of weirdos to see you. I would absolutely adore a copy of your book, your blog helps me get through the days.
438 Cookie McCool March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: Please please please pick me! My office just had a tornado drill that only served to illustrate how we will all die horribly in the event of a tornado, I need a happy! And some McDonald’s!
439 Nina March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: Memememememeeeee!!!
I couldn’t make it to your NJ stop and I’m still crushed
Had planned to buy the paperback then but it never happened… so I totally need one!
I also need to get my ass on a plane and see you at one of your next stops
440 Andrea March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: I borrowed it from the library the first time, so a paperback copy with a bonus chapter would rock.
441 h March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: This is an awesome picture!
442 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 4:33 pm: I would love a copy, please. Thank you. And, congratulations on the success of your book. I do enjoy reading your blog.
443 Norma March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: I would love to win one….but if not, I am definitely buying it when i get paid!!! I wish I still had the petrified frog and lizard from when I was a kid, i would so send them to you.
444 Paula March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: Come to Maine on your book tour! I promise… we have lots of wierd and dysfunctional people here.
445 Mandy V March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: I love your book, my mother stole my copy so i will have to buy the paperback. Hope your tour stops in Texas too
446 CM March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: OOOH pick me, I can smell like cupcakes too! Also because I’m 6 hours away from Miami and totally not going to make it but really wish I could! /hopeful smile
CM recently posted..Fuzzy Slippers
447 Julie H March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: Only #5?!?? You deserve #1! Thanks for all the laughs. Please give me a book.
448 Vengy March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: Hey! That’s my hand somewhere in there. My hand is totally famous now!

I have all 3 versions of your book! 2 of them are signed which is awesome. (If I’d have had bigger balls at the Chicago signing I’d have gotten the audiobook done too. Damn!) So you can take me out of the running for the autographed ones. But thank you for being so awesome!
449 John B March 14, 2013 at 4:34 pm: Eeeeeee!!!
John B recently posted..Comment on About Us by David Folschinsky
450 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 4:35 pm: Yay book!
451 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 4:35 pm: So, the other night, I was lying in bed and I farted.
So of course my partner goes “Ewwwwww, why is it always so stinky”.
And being delirious (it was quite late), I wondered aloud “What if I stuck an orange in my pants. Then it would smell great!”.
And she’s like “What. Don’t do that. That is even worse.”
But I continued musing: “But then it would be all lumpy. You could call me BaboonButt.”
And I got a “Stop Talking.”
Which reminded me of you and Victor, so clearly I deserve a book for farting in bed.
452 Marcie M. March 14, 2013 at 4:35 pm: I’d love to win a copy!
453 MsGrumpee March 14, 2013 at 4:35 pm: Wonderful! I’d love a copy!
454 Xander March 14, 2013 at 4:35 pm: You don’t have to say free book twice to me!
Xander recently posted..Protagonist or Antagonist?
455 Gristle McThornbody March 14, 2013 at 4:35 pm: The people in your crowds look as happy to be there as you are to have them Congrats on all the well-deserved success!
Gristle McThornbody recently posted..Welcome to Eclectic Geekage!
456 Gen Thomassy March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: Want a signed copy. Need to say thanks for the great stories. Love your book. And can’t wait for the next one. P.S. I offer bribe of actual pony rides (Eclipse the Andalusian for adults and Percy the cutest Shetland on earth for the kiddies-in Liberty Hill–not that far) if I win.
457 Kimmie March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: I want one!!
Kimmie recently posted..I simply remember my favorite things…
458 Vibe March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: me!
Because I only have the kindle version due to living in Kenya, where your publisher seems to have forgotten to launch your book!
And because I’m currently exiled in Denmark waiting to give birth to my first child in about 12 days… And tonight I decided to watch a birthing documentary on tv which has left me horrified, terrified and oddly exhilarated at the same time… I need a dose of you to keep my mind off it
459 Dawn Ellen March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: Every single person in that photograph is smiling! How amazing is that?! I have nary a copy of your book, and I do so hope I am one of the chosen.
460 sarah meyer March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: Congrats Jenny, you earned it.
461 Gesci March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: Congratulations, so many times over!! You truly deserve all the accolades- not only is your book hilarious and well-written, but YOU are such a gift to the world! Yayayayyayay!
Gesci recently posted..Happy Eighth Birthday, Max!
462 Libby March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm: OH MY GOD PLEASE PICK ME…. and here’s why… I just spent the entire day scrubbing black and orange mold out of the grout in TWO bathrooms. With BLEACH AND BAKING SODA! My LUNGS ARE ON FIRE!!!! For the love of Halloween, please let me have a copy of my very own to love and stroke and hold and squeeze too tight and make it go EEEEEEEEK and I will call it George. Thanks for your support. I mean, by tomorrow, I’ll probably die of NOSE BLISTERS.
463 cay t. March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: You have so many followers bc the you are awesome and giant metal chicken.
464 Sheli March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: I think you- via your books- are pretty awesome! You bring light to many issues that people have been told not to talk about. You also make me feel it’s ok every time I say the work “fuck” Along with the fact that I’m 43 and my mother still yells at me on Facebook when I’m being honest about wanting to punch people in the neck when they drive their Amigo’s like assholes through the store isles. I would love a signed copy and I wouldn’t sell it. I would keep it and then give away my other to someone who has a stick up their butt in hopes that when they laughed at what you write the stick would magically fall out.
465 Julie March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: I don’t see how it’s our fault you’re so funny.
Julie recently posted..Seriously deep revelations on doing vs. being
466 vwolfe March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: Oh I want pick me pick me
467 Talia Stork March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: Can’t wait to see you in Dayton Ohio on March 19th — and it will be my BIRTHDAY!!!
468 Pamela Minkler March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: please Please PLEASE?!? I just finished the hardcover version and want the bonus chapter AND the autograph … and I promise not to sell it on eBay. Also, I asked my husband for a 5 foot metal chicken for my birthday, but I got earrings and a pair of shoes instead. I think he thought I was kidding about the chicken. I wasn’t.
469 Tracy March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: Eeeeeeee!! Pick meeeeeee!!
470 Kim March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: Congratulations! I have your book on my Kindle, but would love to have a hard copy. Especially a signed one. Because now that you’ve said “give it to a new friend and see how easily they’re offended’ I’ve got all sorts of ideas. It’d be a great way to make new friends that will last – the main screening would be someone that recognizes it lying on the table while I’m drinking a cup of coffee. Or a shot of tequila. Hmm, maybe the tequila would get me a closer match. If I’d had a hard copy last fall I’d have saved a lot of ‘omg I thought she was a real friend’ angst. (Sadly, not joking.)
471 Jeannie March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: Would love a copy of the new book! And congrats!!
472 Punky Coletta March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: Looks like an awesome experience!
Punky Coletta recently posted..Purple Monster: Grimace? Or Vibrator?
473 Linny March 14, 2013 at 4:37 pm: I’d KILL for a signed copy of you new book, Jenny!

I mean really…is there anyone you need me to kill? I’ve never done it before but I’m a quick learner….and it IS a SIGNED book!…uh, oh, looks like I have a motive! maybe I’m not going to be good at this.
474 Valerie March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: Pick me! Choose me! Love me!
475 Connie C March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: Would love love LOVE the book! I don’t have a copy yet at all =( sadness
476 Kate Colvin March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: Send me one in Canada, so I can spread your spirit around these Rocky Mountains!!
477 Pat March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: I am this close to getting my shit together!
478 Borg Blog March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: You are coming to a town where I *used* to be, but I have moved across country to be with my new love in the last week. I thought about staying long enough to meet you… but… I couldn’t find the perfect taxidermied animal to give you, so….
Borg Blog recently posted..Risky Business….
479 Stacy J March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: Me please.
480 Lori March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: I was just coming back to re-read your last post (where you ask “what the hell was Grimace? A stain?”) because it made me laugh so. I would love a signed copy of your book!
481 Alisha Parker March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: Thank you for helping me to realize that I am not alone in my crazy filled world of pure awesomeness. You make me feel more normal. And slightly LESS crazy. But definitely more normal.
482 Lindsey March 14, 2013 at 4:38 pm: I should totally win
483 Amy Shier March 14, 2013 at 4:39 pm: You rock. If you send me one please write that it’s to “doctor”.
484 laura March 14, 2013 at 4:39 pm: Me please! I missed you when you came to Boston…anxiety is lame, and I’m still kicking myself. Plus I totally don’t have the paper-back copy yet, and nowhere near enough cash to justify buying it again.
485 Shelly March 14, 2013 at 4:39 pm: Oh!! Pick me!!
486 Helen March 14, 2013 at 4:39 pm: I actually need two copies of your book because I know so many weird people and I like to share. Congrats! You’ve earned every copy you’ve sold!
487 Davin March 14, 2013 at 4:39 pm: Eventually you WILL come to Utah!! I’m sure everyone and their sister wives would love to see you!
488 Erika March 14, 2013 at 4:40 pm: Cool beans! I bought the first kindle version and would love to have a signed paperback.
489 Teresa March 14, 2013 at 4:40 pm: too cool, congratulations! can’t wait to get paperback copies to give to my sisters/nieces; loved the e-book, can’t wait to read the extra chapter! would be awesome if I had autographed copy.
490 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 4:40 pm: oh oh i would love, love, love one!
491 Claire March 14, 2013 at 4:40 pm: Pick Me! Pick Me! (pretty please with sprinkles and a cherry on top)
I don’t have a copy yet and it would make me feel better over you not coming to the UK.
492 Rockstar Deanna March 14, 2013 at 4:41 pm: Me, pretty please!!! I haz metal chicken on my porch!
493 Erika H March 14, 2013 at 4:41 pm: I gave a friend MY copy of your book (with the nameplate) because she wanted it so badly and I’m THAT good of a friend. Or you know, I waited until the last minute then couldn’t find it anywhere (because it’s awesome and sold out) and just had to give her my copy… which means I need another.

Also, I love Doctor Who. And cats. And taxidermied animals…primarily stoats. I need a stoat. (I think that’s a given… we all need stoats, in coats.) Aaaaaand I’ve gifted it to others before. Which means I’m a giver. And a sharer. And I’m not normally all like “look at what I’ve done” but when you want a book and 404 other people have commented, you do whatcha’ gotta’ do.

Glad the book has done so phenomenally well… not that any of are surprised! Congrats to you!
494 Terri March 14, 2013 at 4:41 pm: I really needed my Jenny therapy today…thanks!
495 MrsGoodnight March 14, 2013 at 4:41 pm: Cheers, Dahling! I’ll be seeing you in Kansas City! I need a copy so I can give it to my friend who is all pissy that I’m making a special trip home to see you, even though she asks me to come visit regularly!
496 Libby March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: EEEEEEEEE is also the sound a slightly psychotic monkey makes when it is flinging poo. Or… you know… so I’ve heard…
497 Tanya March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: pick meeeee! i cant see you in person because of a little thing called the pacific ocean. poop
Tanya recently posted..yo
498 Amy Lewis March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: Ooooh, me! Pick me!
499 Leslie March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: PER-LEEEEZE come to Seattle again?? I promise not to be *too* stalker-y weird…but probably will be a little bit but that’s ’cause I can’t help it. At least I won’t be scary. PROMISE.
Leslie recently posted..And Now A PSA. Also a PSA: Delta Airlines Sucks Ass Cheeze.
500 Gail Joseph March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: Pick me!!!! My daughter said she’d give me my copy back (you signed it for us in Boston), but somehow I’ve never seen it again!
501 Janika March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: I have so enjoyed watching you through this whole journey. You are a blessing, and I’m so happy for you!
Janika recently posted..monthly update March 2013
502 Sue O March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: awww… you were in NJ while I was in the Bahamas (guess I win on that one, huh? LOL!) but I wish I had your book while I was laying on the beach! Would love a copy!
503 Crystal March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: Bought the paperback and missed seeing you in Naperville, IL so I would love an autographed copy!
504 LA Smith March 14, 2013 at 4:42 pm: You are amazing, Jenny. I loved your book more than anything else I read last year.
LA Smith recently posted..Art on My Door — A daily practice
505 lowell March 14, 2013 at 4:43 pm: Wub you Louise! Oh you’re not Louise Erdrich. excuse me.
506 Jill March 14, 2013 at 4:43 pm: Thanks for making me laugh inappropriately on the commuter train, listening to the audiobook. I would love a signed copy of the book because I already own this:
https://mobile.twitter.com/JillMakesStuff/media/grid?idx=9&tid=302103188675375104
If you ever come to Upstate NY I will gladly teach you to knit condom pockets for errant 20 somethings.
Jill recently posted..Hand Dyed Angora Silk Laceweight Yarn – Maritime by jilldrapermakesstuff
507 Judy B. March 14, 2013 at 4:43 pm: You are not merely “a part” of a bizarre tribe, you are its inspiration! (You are also the reason I have a giant metal chicken in my courtyard. His name is Zoot.)
508 Sue March 14, 2013 at 4:44 pm: Thank you for all the laughs! You always make my day!
509 Andie March 14, 2013 at 4:44 pm: My husband pre-ordered your book in hard cover for me, which I’m pretty sure he regretted as I was laughing so hard I woke him up several times. Sadly, I lost the book in our house fire on February 1st. I would love a replacement, pick me!
510 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 4:44 pm: Ooh ooh! Pick me! I came to your last tour but I can’t make it to this one!
511 Esmertina March 14, 2013 at 4:44 pm: I would totally be one of those nervous people, slowly realizing I actually related to the people around me, and feeling myself open up and Be Myself With Strangers! I’ve experienced this at Amanda Palmer shows, and I have her signed posters to remind me This Can Happen. I would love a signed book too
512 Debi March 14, 2013 at 4:44 pm: Would love the book and some cool taxidermy but, the book alone would be awesome.
513 Ann March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: So happy for your success!! I’ll be buying another copy (unless I win one) because I MUST read the bonus chapter!
514 Ashley March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: After months of reading here, I thought I couldn’t tell if you were the type who would want me to beg, bribe or both, but I think I know the answer. Both. And alliteration counts for something, right?!? I would LOVE a copy!! (And totally share it…but only if I could watch over those people’s shoulder to make sure they didn’t steal it.)
515 Aften March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: Pick me!!!! Congrats on all of your success… You deserve it
516 The Jellyfish March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: As a member of the far-off and probably-never-will-be-visited-Australia, I would adore the next best thing – a signed copy of your delightful book.

In a world where everyone pretends to be sane, your existence is a wonderful reminder that it’s perfectly ok not to be. Long live ruined soufflés!
The Jellyfish recently posted..Adventures with the law.
517 Stacy March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: You say you’re “lucky to be a part of your bizarre tribe.” Lady, I think you’re the REASON for our bizarre tribe! Keep on keepin’ it real. <3
518 Robin Glossner March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: Pick me!
519 Ga March 14, 2013 at 4:45 pm: I don’t know her but it looks like Kari should win one. She sounds like a huge fan, buying all versions of your book. That’s my vote, if we get one : ).
520 Stephanie March 14, 2013 at 4:46 pm: I absolutely LOVE your book and blog!!!
521 Liza B March 14, 2013 at 4:46 pm: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Mememememememe! Uh, please
I want to read the bonus chapter and then pass it along to friends to share the laughter. I’m not giving up my hardcover!
522 allison March 14, 2013 at 4:46 pm: You deserve every bit of the success…We bought two digital copies and one hardcover…We’ll have to get the paperback so there is a complete set, I see. I say this as someone who has read your blog forever and watched this awesome progression to what you have achieved now. You are truly a member of the Double Unicorn Success Club.
523 Caitlin March 14, 2013 at 4:46 pm: I just got mine and now know my plans for the weekend!
524 Dawn March 14, 2013 at 4:46 pm: You are fabulously hilarious! I would be so honored and would worship the book i were picked!
525 Jessica J March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: Hi Jenny! I would love a copy of your book, which I would never use as a coaster.
526 Boxowhine March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I’m sorry if I freaked you out in St. Louis. I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I sniffed you. You smelled really nice. You said it was Copernicus, but it was totally you. I would love another signed copy!
527 Tami H. March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: Congratulations!! And Yay the Tribe! I already *technically* have a paperback version of your book, but doesn’t matter, I’ll use this new one as “to-lend-to-friends-to-get-them-addicted” tool. ;-D
528 Karri March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I need the actual book; I bought the nook book and laughed til I choked, but I couldn’t see the pictures cause I haven’t gone in to get my glasses even though the optometrist said I need them now and they are so teeny on the nook. Thanks!
529 Justine March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: Pick me! Pick me! I hope you come to Minneapolis on your tour again! It was great seeing you last time!
530 Connie March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I teach school and spring break is coming up. I need a copy of your book to take with me to the beach so I can read and laugh and read and laugh and read…….
531 Taj March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I just downloaded your audiobook. It’s great. Duh. I’ve lent out my copy of your book to all of my friends. If they don’t like it, it’s really hard for me to find things to talk about anymore. Thank you for being you!
532 Stephanie March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I can’t wait to see you in SF! Please pick me!
533 linds March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: You are so awesome!! we are lucky to have you in our bizarre tribe. I also reeeaaally wanna read the extra chapter
534 k March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I never win anything. Hell I can’t even win at the soda machine in my office – most days it just takes my money the same way a slot machine does. But I’d love a copy of your book!!!
k recently posted..Reason 4,078 why I Hate My Clinic
535 Deb H March 14, 2013 at 4:47 pm: I loved your hardcover very much and loaned it to a co-worker that STILL hasn’t returned it after far too long!! If I were to get a paperback, I’d be a little less bitter about my loss. Congrats, Jenny, and thank you for the giveaway!
536 Dee Cruz March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: Love your book! We read parts of it at work when we have had a particularly stressful day. (We work with K-5th graders). Thank you for the “healing thru humor” we get.
537 Sara March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: Totally awesome. This little tribe is a lifeline for so many. Your bad-assness inspires us all.
Sara recently posted..Overcome
538 Nicole March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: Loved, loved, loved the book when I read it last year and plan to read it again but I’m dying for the extra chapter.
539 Janet March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: I want to win! Pick me!
Janet recently posted..Shouldn’t You at Least Buy Me Dinner First?
540 Nancy March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: Ermygawd. I had to be a mom the night you were in Minneapolis (okay, technically Edina) last tour and couldn’t come. Please come back and/or gimme the book with the new chapter!
541 Sara March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: I have read the original version of your book twice now. It STILL makes me laugh out loud. Congratulations!!
542 Michelle C March 14, 2013 at 4:48 pm: Congratulations! What an awesome accomplishment!
543 Seanna Lea March 14, 2013 at 4:49 pm: Please pick me! I’m still slowly working my way through your book, because I’m using them as bedtime stories and sometimes I don’t get through a chapter. It is awesome and my husband and I are constantly in stitches.
Seanna Lea recently posted..[10 Tuesday] thank goodness for March
544 Sandy March 14, 2013 at 4:49 pm: Pick me! (since I already have the ahrdcoer and want to see the new bonus materials!
545 Kristin March 14, 2013 at 4:49 pm: I’d love a bonus chapter! And come back to Denver
Kristin recently posted..Jury Privilege
546 Ina March 14, 2013 at 4:49 pm: I am just going to shamelessly beg: PLEASE! I want your book and I can’t buy it. Please!
547 Traci March 14, 2013 at 4:49 pm: Ooh ooohhh pick me! Pick me!
548 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 4:49 pm: Love. You. So. Much. (and Beyonce, too, really, if I’m going to be completely honest.) Knock, knock…was the first I’d read of you. And now I’m hooked.
Sarah recently posted..Happy 1st Anniversary, You Can Do This Project!
549 Danielle H. March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: I really really really want a copy so I can read this extra chapter!!
550 Buffy March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: #5 on the charts, #1 in our hearts. WTG girl! You are badass for real.
551 Linz March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: I’m getting it, one way or the other!
Linz recently posted..I Like to Move It, Move It
552 Liv March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: Congrats! And that photo is so awesome!
553 CD March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: Personally, I think the friend test is a great idea.
554 Sierra March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: Oooh! Another copy would mean that I can lend out the hardcover to people despite the fear that I’ll never get it back. Which would be nice, because then I can get more people hooked while still having my security blanket around. (Yes, your book is one of my security blankets. I read it in the closet sometimes when I’m having a bad anxiety day.)
555 Michelle Weisenberg March 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm: You can personally deliver mine to me when you come to SoCal.
Oh wait…You aren’t.
Michelle Weisenberg recently posted..My bad
556 Sherri Cuddeford March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: Oh PLEASE pick me!
557 Gretchen March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: Heard your book on tape and loved it! I wasn’t able to finish it but would love to receive your book so I could!
558 Vickie March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: You’re not just part of this bizarre tribe. You’re the leader. You should have a wicked cape and head dress along the lines of an Amazon headshrinker. Or a superhero. Even a bath sheet and towel turban would do for this crowd really.
559 Stacy March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: I would love a copy! But I love you and will buy one anyway
560 Melissa March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: weeeee wantee new book!
Melissa recently posted..Harlem Shake Save The Date
561 BooksInGarden March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: Extra chapter – yeah! Oh yes, please.
562 Julie March 14, 2013 at 4:51 pm: You earned this success!
563 Kate March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: Congrats Jenny! I’d love a copy of the paperback too – an extra chapter is sure to be filled with awesomesauce.
564 Kelly Smith March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: I’d love a copy of the paperback! I made my sister read the hardcover you signed when she was here for Xmas. She loved it too!
565 Lee March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: You’re amazing! Enjoy it!
And when your stuck in an airport, you might enjoy Gayle Waters Waters http://youtu.be/ZdPdiQNWDeY
566 Chris J March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: I would love another copy, I keep loaning mine out to friends! So far, everyone loves it, like I knew that they would
567 condo blues March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: My dog stress pooped two times this morning. Then I frantically called the vet because she ate something she shouldn’t. Then I leaned how to make a dog puke. Then I cleaned dog puke from the carpet and guess what? Dog food magically expands on the way back up. Then I got to shampoo every carpet in the house.

I could use a laugh.
condo blues recently posted..11 Painting Tips and Tricks
568 carrie March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: OMG PICK ME. Or come back up north of NY sometime so maybe I can see you in person!
569 Robin March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: Pick me please… I hope to see you in Louisville Monday if all the posted it note hints I have been leaving around for my husband work lol I think they have lets hope…
570 sooze March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: Loved your book the first time around..holy shitsnacks ( my new most favorite word thanks to you ) , it feels so good to laugh !
571 Doobug2 March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: I started reading your blog a few weeks ago and LOVE it!!!! I catchy myself saying, ,knock knock motherfucker” all the time now. Thanks for making me laugh!
572 Deanna March 14, 2013 at 4:52 pm: Please pick me!!!!
573 Raven March 14, 2013 at 4:53 pm: I gave my copy to my long-estranged mother who is trying to stay sober for the first time in my life. She laughed her ass off, cried some, and it brought us closer together. I’ve been meaning to thank you for that. And it’s OK if you pick someone else–I’ll end up buying another copy anyway…and probably give it to a friend when I talk it up! You totally deserve this success!!
574 Carol March 14, 2013 at 4:53 pm: I’d love a copy please! Congrats!
575 Amber March 14, 2013 at 4:53 pm: Yay for cool people and awesome books!!
576 Tamago March 14, 2013 at 4:53 pm: Oo, pick me! Though I already have a copy from your NYC stop, I’m giving it as a gift, so I could use one for myself!
577 Monica March 14, 2013 at 4:53 pm: Please, please, please pick me! I live in Mexico (I’m an expat) and unless you plan on touring south of the border, it will be my only chance to come close to meeting you! I am such a big fan. I flew to Ohio last year for a Beyonce the giant metal chicken party!
578 Mercedes March 14, 2013 at 4:53 pm: I would LOVE to have a copy of the paperback. I gave BOTH of my original copies to friends because they didn’t understand why I think you are so f-ing hilarious! I can’t justify buying a third copy…. hoping i get one here! ::fingers-crossed::

Glad the tour is going so well!
579 Shannon DeLane Leslie March 14, 2013 at 4:54 pm: I am a father of four who grew up in a small town in NC and can relate to your book so well please send me a copy here in wilmington, nc and Ill mail you some sand back in return
580 Sony Smith March 14, 2013 at 4:54 pm: I have yet to buy the paperback copy, so getting one for free, and one that you have signed to boot,would be a procrastinator’s dream, so I would feel doubley honored to recieve your glorious book in a easily portable edition with one extra (bonus) chapter,and bedazzled with your fab john hancock,as well as not have to make any effort on my part to actually procure it.
Enjoy your tour, and all the love that comes with it.
581 Vivienne March 14, 2013 at 4:54 pm: I keep re-reading your book and waiting to stop laughing out loud. it’s been 10 months and no luck yet!
582 Corey March 14, 2013 at 4:54 pm: My wife would absolutely love one and it’s our anniversary
583 Emily March 14, 2013 at 4:54 pm: I hope I win! I have the hard back but haven’t purchased the paper back yet (sorry…just being honest!). I love you!
584 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 4:55 pm: i would love for you pick me my original copy has been stolen by my workmates, and i wasn’t even half way through!

i did however also buy the kindle edition they couldn’t steal that version…………
585 Bridgette March 14, 2013 at 4:55 pm: Woo! I still haven’t read this (I know, I suck), but I really really really want to!
586 Pam March 14, 2013 at 4:55 pm: I need the book to hit my imaginary boyfriend in the head with when he doesn’t agree 100% with me. This size will not leave marks.

Thanks,

Pam
You rock!
587 Whitney M. March 14, 2013 at 4:55 pm: I must have one! If I don’t win it, I’m buying it!
588 Patti, aka oldgoatwoman March 14, 2013 at 4:55 pm: Can’t wait for you to get to Kansas City! You are awesomer than anybody!
589 Jen K March 14, 2013 at 4:55 pm: Seeing you on your hardcover tour in Portland, OR was one of the highlights of my year. I’m so happy for your success. I’ve shared my copy of your book with everyone I know. And they’ve all loved it as much as I do!!!
590 Kristina Cline March 14, 2013 at 4:56 pm: Awesome people are awesome. I am so glad that you have hordes of nervous folks coming to your things. You are bringing them out, you! You did it, your words and wit! I love your book and I would love to get the next chapter.
591 Therealkmarrs March 14, 2013 at 4:56 pm: My good friend Dawnie is in that photo. She recently wrote you a letter on her blog. I was the friend texting her that she did too belong. Anyway, my turn is next Tuesday in Dayton and omg squee!
592 keely March 14, 2013 at 4:56 pm: please come (back) to boston! This town is full of crazys who need you!
593 Doni March 14, 2013 at 4:56 pm: I’d love a chance to read the bonus chapter!
594 Kara March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: Sounds like fun…I wish you had a tour stop a littler closer to me!
595 Susan Davis March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: Me! Pick me!
596 Brian Mann March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: I need a copy for my sister!
597 Amber S. March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: Your book is one of my favorites. When I meet new people there are 3 important questions I ask. 1. Do you love The Doctor? 2. Do you know who Jenny AKA The Bloggess is? 3. Are you ready for the Zombie Apocolypse? If even one answer is “huh” they must be exterminated.
598 Heather March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: LOVE the cd version you have made me laugh and cry and plug through some ugly and some fun times please keep writing!!!
599 Nori S March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: I’ve already bought one, but I’d love to have an autographed copy!
600 Caitlin March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: I’d also like a book, please!
601 Jennifer K. March 14, 2013 at 4:57 pm: Congrats on the list placement! Pick me! Pick me! I’d love to read the bonus chapter!
602 Molly Dugger Brennan March 14, 2013 at 4:58 pm: So pleased that you are being introduced to the world’s weird and wonderful people. It’s a huge tribe of which I am honored to be a member. We are a loyal group.
Molly Dugger Brennan recently posted..It All Starts With Hello
603 Alyssa Bottrell March 14, 2013 at 4:58 pm: Oh my gosh, I want to stay up all night & read your book in one sitting and then go into work the next day looking hung over or strung out on too much caffeine because I stayed up all night. Puh-leeze!!!
604 Lisa Basham March 14, 2013 at 4:58 pm: “I love you!” She squeeks nervously…the uncomfortable silence is deafening…
605 Madeline March 14, 2013 at 4:58 pm: I’m a broke college kid who will probably go to Barnes & Noble just to read the extra chapter, since I can’t afford to buy your book a fourth time. The problem is that outings trigger my anxiety, so I’ll have to either do it one sentence at a time over the course of a few weeks, or sneak it into the bathroom, which seems oddly appropriate now that I think about it… Pick me?
606 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm: Congrats!! and would love to win a copy!
607 Amy March 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm: oooh pick me! I’m already upset that you’ll be in NJ when I JUST moved out of that state down to Florida. A book would totally make me feel better. Also, you coming to Miami would also make me feel better.
608 dm March 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm: I have the e-book but would love a hard copy!
609 Lim March 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm: I’d put a copy in the bathroom at work. People need to know, and they need to know while sitting with their pants down around their ankles.
610 Shelley March 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm: I LOVE your book. I have never laughed so hard reading a book and now I have my husband reading it. We would love to have an autographed copy!
611 ConnieC March 14, 2013 at 4:59 pm: Please pick me – I loaned the hardback covered book to my sister who left it at a job she left, although I may have to buy it for the extra chapter…..luv u
612 Gracey March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: Squeee!!!! Giveaway!!!!
613 Bethany March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333
614 Kirsten B. March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: I’d LOVE a copy!!!!
615 Kim March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: Congratulations! Best of luck on the tour!
616 Jeremiah March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: Happy Pi Day! And Congrats on the paper back. Feel free to pick me as a winner so i can read your book as I heal from my broken ankle.

-J-
Jeremiah recently posted..Trying Some Ruby
617 diane March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: Need to read the bonus chapter!
618 Traci March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: I’d love a copy – I haven’t seen the bonus chapter yet. Fingers crossed!
619 Haley Nagy March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: Woooo! Not long before it hits #1! GO TEAM!
620 Helen March 14, 2013 at 5:00 pm: Woo! Congratulations!
621 APL March 14, 2013 at 5:01 pm: Hi. Loved the book and have bought copies for other people. It would be cool to get a signed copy and I doubt you’ll be bringing the signing tour to the UK, so good luck to me.
622 Theresa March 14, 2013 at 5:01 pm: I already got my line ticket for your book signing in Cincinnati, OH!! My sister had just introduced me to your blogs about a week ago – THEN she tells me you were coming to Cincinnati!! OMG!

Searching through past blogs, I found the one about the swanky “transient hotel” – I was laughing so hard I was crying and stomping my foot on floor!

Thank you for sharing the way your mind works.
623 Carmen S March 14, 2013 at 5:02 pm: You make me laugh, you make me cry, and you give me inspiration. Thank YOU.
624 Jen M. March 14, 2013 at 5:02 pm: I would love a signed copy.
625 Liz March 14, 2013 at 5:02 pm: CONGRATS! Hoping for that lovely paperback to grace my mailbox.
626 Kimberly March 14, 2013 at 5:02 pm: Pick me! Pick me!! I’d love a copy!
627 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 5:02 pm: Before I read your book, my husband and I were to buying a giant chicken. They sell them at Eastern Market in Detroit. True story.
Love your book and your blog!
628 Kennedy March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: Yay! So happy for you! That’s great!
629 Tracy Tyree March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: I am so excited to see you in Louisville on Monday night! I came from Huntsville AL up here just to see your bad ass self
630 Louise March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: Congratulations on your wonderful successes. I would love to add your book to my collection.
Louise recently posted..REPEATER: The Perfect Song
631 Stacy March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: Yippee!!! Congratulations!
632 Hollie March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: Ooh, ooh, you have to pick me!! My sister and I went to our local garden store and proceeded to line up chickens on a step behind each other, pretend to knock on an imaginary door, and turn around to see which one our eye went to first. THEN we went over to my other sister’s house, attempted to knock on her screen door, she spotted me as I half tripped/jumped over the railing, and then nearly knocked her very own mini Beyonce off of the porch when she opened the door. But she enjoyed it nonetheless. ;>) Keep on keepin’ on!!
633 Lu March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: PickMe! I would love to use it as a coaster! Just kidding, obviously
634 Stacy March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: FUN!! I’d love your autograph!
635 Gerta March 14, 2013 at 5:03 pm: Awww. I love that you have a following that isn’t creepy, but sweetly bizarre. Congratulations!
636 Shelly March 14, 2013 at 5:04 pm: I was introduced to your book from my sister in law. I fell madly on love!! Your stories abd writing style are perfect! I read the book through on 2 days and promptly found your website and Facebook sites! Thank you for making it ok to be a little odd!!
637 Caitlyn March 14, 2013 at 5:05 pm: Congratulations!!
638 Tabitha March 14, 2013 at 5:05 pm: Pick me! I love paper. And I love backs.
639 Kelsey March 14, 2013 at 5:05 pm: oh! me!
640 Kathy March 14, 2013 at 5:05 pm: Saw you in NJ and must say that YOU ROCK!!!!
We thought it was just going to be a book signing but you did a chapter reading and a Q & A and it was awesome. You are my hero.
Thank you for coming to NJ.
641 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 5:06 pm: I would love to own your new book. thanks for the contest!
642 Courtney March 14, 2013 at 5:06 pm: That’s awesome news. Congratulations!
Courtney recently posted..Chinese Zodiac: Tiger
643 Barbara S. March 14, 2013 at 5:06 pm: oh, pick me, pick me! I am listening to your hilarious/disturbing/instructional book while walking on the treadmill. I get extra points for spending the big bucks on the audio version, right? Also, I tried listening while doing that weird elliptical contraption for the first time and I almost killed myself. So, more points for being willing to die for your book, I think. Plus, I need to see some pictures of your dad. I’m thinking of him as Captain Lou Albano, but I don’t think that’s right. In conclusion, I think you are a brave and wonderful person and writer.
644 Stephanie March 14, 2013 at 5:06 pm: I want a book!!!
645 SeaYoMama March 14, 2013 at 5:06 pm: An old family story: when my parents were on their honeymoon during the end of WWII, they went to Reno and my dad ran into actor John Wayne at the bar. My dad was thrilled, introduced himself as a fan, and told The Duke that it was his anniversary, and Wayne said, “Congratu-goddamn-lations”.

So, Jenny, I already have your book, but in any case, congratu-goddamn-lations!

PS My father then ruined my mother’s part of the anniversary by spending the whole evening with John Wayne in a bar. There are no truly functional families!
646 Erika March 14, 2013 at 5:07 pm: DO WANT!
647 this chick March 14, 2013 at 5:07 pm: i totally want a copy of book, please!
648 Elizabeth B March 14, 2013 at 5:07 pm: OOH ME ME ME! I already have a hardback copy but I wanna read the new chapter!
649 M.A. Smith March 14, 2013 at 5:07 pm: I’d love a copy, because I don’t know when I’ll get a chance to buy one.
M.A. Smith recently posted..See, I Do Remember to Post More Often than Every 2 Weeks!
650 SeaYoMama March 14, 2013 at 5:07 pm: Oops. Honeymoon.
651 Lisa V March 14, 2013 at 5:08 pm: I do not own a nook or a kindle or any of those other fancy schmancy devices. I buy books, so that I can read them and people will know what I’m reading and then they will ask me questions about the book I’m reading. So, when I’m reading your awesome book at the beach this year, people will be asking me about it. And I will tell them, and also, I will burn in the sun.
652 Kara March 14, 2013 at 5:08 pm: We like giving you titles – “New York Times Best Selling Author” just sounds so cool when multiplied. I’d love a copy signed – missed you in Chicago by 1 day but did get a picture of the book at the O’Hare bookstore. They were dressed in “Signed by the Author” stickers.) Didn’t buy one though as I picked one up on Release Day.
653 Melanie March 14, 2013 at 5:08 pm: I love the guy with the red tu-tu. So adorable. Congratulations Jenny, you’re a star xox
654 Robyn March 14, 2013 at 5:08 pm: You should pick me because I’m in Canada. . And most likely cannot see you on tour
Robyn recently posted..Home.
655 Kate March 14, 2013 at 5:08 pm: My friend stole my book, I need a new one!
656 Nancy T March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: Hooray! I love this book so much. I have been reading a chapter everyday after a very stressful couple of weeks and it makes me laugh and I feel better.
657 Beth March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: I already have the book, I’m here for the comments. Keep up the fantabulous work!
658 Angela March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: It’s my BIRTHDAY and I have the hardback version out from the library. Pick meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Angela recently posted..Staycation Day 1
659 Darediva March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: Oh! Oh! Pick me! ~~~waving frantically~~~
660 Ami March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: I like to think of it less as “we did it together” and more as: YOU did it by creating an awesome space, and a snort lemonade out of your nose on a plane funny book, and then WE acknowledged your awesome with cold hard cash. Proving the world not yet ready for destruction.
Yes, the lemonade in nostrils thing was painful. Thanks.
Ami recently posted..Fennel & Pepper Bacon Stuffing
661 Flatlander in VT March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: Awesome! I’ve got it as a nook book because paper pages tear too easily in the hands of my little monsters but I could totally hide a paperback at work and make people think I’m even more odd when I start randomly giggling to myself heh.
662 Ana March 14, 2013 at 5:09 pm: I would *love* a copy!!!
663 Nicole March 14, 2013 at 5:10 pm: I am SO thrilled you are having such success on your paperback tour (if a little weepy that you won’t be coming to my lovely bookstorein Memphis)!! I could always use another copy of your book-I am constantly hand selling it at the store, convincing folks (whohave NO idea what I’m getting them into) that they MUST read it NOW–and in fact, I’ve decided that I will be giving a copy of your book to all my future potential suitors. I will highlight the beautiful passage about a chicken named Beyonce. If a man either A. does not find that entire scenario humorous, or B. thinks it’s not realistic (and highly likely), then he really has no business trying to date me. Love you big–best wishes for big crowds and a safe and happy tour!!! XOXO
664 Meg March 14, 2013 at 5:10 pm: I would like a copy! I’ve bought five copies of your book for friends already! this way, I can make sure one more person wets their pants from laughing.
665 Alex March 14, 2013 at 5:10 pm: Would love a copy!
666 Candy Eich March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: Oh oh oh, me please! Pick me!! *fingers crossed eyes closed*
667 Terri March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: You are the highlight of the day for so many of my friends, my sisters, daughters…etc… Your book is awesome and just another way for us to enjoy your crazy, fun, and bright spirit. Thank you and can’t wait to meet you next week! EEEEEE……:)
668 Annette March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: Gimme gimme gimme! Please!
669 Leigh Evans March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: I’d love a copy! Pick me, please!
670 Ron March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: Too bad I can’t get one autographed in person!
671 Kelly @ In the Mom Light Blog March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: Pick me pick me! I was always last to be picked for dodge ball, and it would help make up for that.
Kelly @ In the Mom Light Blog recently posted..The Very Hungry Mommy
672 Tonia March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: I adore you. I want nothing more than to read your book from cover to cover and then sit and read it again several dozen times.
673 Malinda March 14, 2013 at 5:11 pm: Pretty, pretty, pretty Please??????? Pick me!!! Can’t wait to see you in Cincinnati!!
674 Sue Ellen March 14, 2013 at 5:12 pm: You can only pick me if Hamlet von Schnitzel signs it too.
675 Cindyp March 14, 2013 at 5:12 pm: Love your stuff
676 Denise Rand Huebner March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: I’m so excited for you. Can’t wait to see you during the next leg of the tour.
677 Amber March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: I’d absolutely love a copy! I’ve been meaning to read it so winning a copy would be perfect!
678 Nephele March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: I have a kindle copy but I need the paper copy for reading in the bath.
679 Pipi March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: I can’t wait to read the bonus chapter of your book. I haven’t been able to buy it yet due to saving for daycare for my daughter, but I still can’t wait to read.
680 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: If you were coming to a city near me, I would totally sneak in nervously.
But alas, Florida is no-man’s land.
681 tehTimmah March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: well, if you do pick me, I will be flattered, honored, and delighted. If you do not, then I will have to go out and buy another copy (my hardcover is probably still in the possession of my ex. May it bring her some joy, she needs it) Either way, I am going to have to get a new copy.
682 Mishelle March 14, 2013 at 5:13 pm: Me! Me! Sorry.. sounds a little greedy doesn’t it? I blame the kids, I’m surrounded by them all day and at the end sharing seems kinda wrong. (just don’t tell them )

M
683 Rea March 14, 2013 at 5:14 pm: You did it, we just bought a really great book by an awesome person!!
Rea recently posted..He’s my very own rage therapist.
684 Megan March 14, 2013 at 5:14 pm: Love your book! Love this post!
Megan recently posted..Google analytics – Stalk in secrecy
685 Anne March 14, 2013 at 5:14 pm: Would love a copy! One of the funniest books I have ever read!!!
686 Kellibelli March 14, 2013 at 5:14 pm: Cupcakes & Magnificence: I have always preached that cupcakes should be their own food group. And that the actual cupcake is really just a delivery device for the FROSTING…Mmmmm. So, maybe the frosting is the magnificence!?!?!
687 Emily R March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: Yay Jenny! Congrats
688 Rozza March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: Pick me!!!!

I agree with Ron – I’m too hemisphere-challenged to get an autographed on in person!

Rozza recently posted..at Museum of Modern Art (MoMA)
689 Mel March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: Me, so very much please, please.
690 Joanne Kersh March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: Wow. I’m a hard workin single mom. My wuzband is kind of a deadbeat. And my boss is so far up my ass I’m wearing two pairs of shoes ( not my joke. I’m too stressed out to think of my own.). I so need your book. For free. Love you.
691 krystin731 March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: Book.
692 Sally March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: I’d love to win a copy, because I went to the bookstore to buy it, but I only had $10. I read part of the last chapter and was laughing so hard I was crying. The BN helpers kept checking on me. So I’d Love to win a copy (I know I said that already, but it’s really really true!).
693 Tiffany March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm: That’s amazing! I wish I could have seen you when you were in Illinois.
694 Rozza March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: And don’t let the Tumblr/Instagrams fool you… am back in Oz now.
695 Lorene March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: Congrats! You’re the awesomest. I need to read that extra chapter. Maybe in a book that came directly from you.
696 David March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: Why won’t you come to Memphis? Don’t be scared. You’ll have an armed guard at your side the whole time. I promise.
697 Doug March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: We’re hoping to come see you again but you were much closer the last time you were in Phoenix. I’m trying to convince my parents they need to go too so you can corrupt 3 generations of my family.
698 Click1st March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: I can never look at metal chicken without saying ‘Knock-knock mother f*cker’!! Am planning on making a 2 hour trip to see you in person. *YAY*

Pick me. )
699 Susan March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: I gave my hardback copy to a very special friend (mostly to make her laugh so hard that beverages shot out of her nose), so I’m jonesing for a paperback version!
700 Erin March 14, 2013 at 5:16 pm: Me Please!
701 Jessie T-B March 14, 2013 at 5:17 pm: Bonus chapter?!?! Yes please! Good luck on the tour!
702 amra March 14, 2013 at 5:17 pm: i must have a copy of your book! I LOVE YOUR WRITING SO MUCH!! lol i have yet to read the bonus chapter but i can hardly wait! i think ill pee my pants if i get a copy signed by you in the mail. lol i will totally lose it my husban wont be able to peel me off the ceiling for weeks! thanks!!
703 Ericamos March 14, 2013 at 5:17 pm: I’d love a signed paperback! Good luck on the rest of your tour!
Ericamos recently posted..Harlem Shake
704 Tracy B March 14, 2013 at 5:18 pm: Would love a copy!! Also, I would like to leave this link in case anyone reading the comments needs a dose of awesome! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=diU70KshcjA
705 Cindy March 14, 2013 at 5:18 pm: No, thank YOU. For real. Thanks for making me laugh. (Damn, are you really going to read all of these?!)
706 Reagen Allen March 14, 2013 at 5:18 pm: It would be great to have a copy of your book, and it gives you bragging rights that your book reached South Africa
707 Nay. March 14, 2013 at 5:18 pm: Pick me! Pick me!

Also, I just love ya!
708 Jeannette Sindik March 14, 2013 at 5:18 pm: I will seeing you in Phoenix! My daughter and I are making an event of it….you know eating out at great restaurants, shopping the outlet malls (can we get you anything?) , showing up at B&N to get our books that we OWN..people quit asking for a free book…buy on for Christ’s sake, you sound pathetic…and possibly a couple of small metal chickens, it depends if we can fit them in the car. Then, to the hotel because we don’t live in Phoenix anymore. Thank you for giving us a reason to PARTY!! and my husband’s paying for everything…awwwww!
709 Rena March 14, 2013 at 5:19 pm: I’m commenting because I want to read the bonus chapter. I already know who I’ll give my hardback copy to. Also, I’m sad that you aren’t coming near me on this tour.
710 Rebecca March 14, 2013 at 5:19 pm: That would be great! Im also very happy for you. You have wonderful fans with incredible sense of humors.
711 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 5:19 pm: I would love a copy!
712 Adrasteia March 14, 2013 at 5:19 pm: I’d be one of those people creeping weirdly in alone… Although sadly I’m afraid of other humans, so I would probably leave alone too. Oh well.
Adrasteia recently posted..More developments
713 meg March 14, 2013 at 5:19 pm: Well, if you’re not going to venture anywhere near the eastern panhandle of WV .. I’m going to need that autographed copy since I won’t be able to see you in person to sign the one I bought. That’s 1 copy down.. next!
meg recently posted..Sleep Study #4
714 Eliza March 14, 2013 at 5:20 pm: Favorite book Evah!
715 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 5:20 pm: I am raising my hand with my eyes squeezed shut and my arm about to jump out of its socket like Arnold Horshack “Oh, oh, oh!” In Mr. Kotter’s class. Pleease let this be the first thing I ever won. Or I might lose what little sliver of eager hopefulness I still possess!
716 MaryA March 14, 2013 at 5:20 pm: I love your book, and I love that there are so many people at the signing! You have millions of fans, and that is mathematically correct.
717 Tina C. March 14, 2013 at 5:20 pm: Pick me, please!
718 Bethany March 14, 2013 at 5:20 pm: Pick me!
Bethany recently posted..Project 365: Macaroons!
719 Kim March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: I would really love to have the paperback to go with my hardback then I will have a full set. Right not it’s not even and it’s driving me crazy!
720 Deanna March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: You should pick me because I like unicorns and have dead stuff mounted above my fireplace. I married a man that likes to kill Bambi’s Momma so I can grind her up in my kitchenaid. Also, one time..my husband and I got drunk and ran butt naked around the outside of our house in the rain. (We live in town) Thank goodness I got that boob job!
721 Sheila March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: Oh pick me! Pick me! *jumping up and down* My twin needs a copy… wait my twin already has MY copy. I need another one!!
722 erin March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: Right on friend-I’ve-not-yet-met! Way to go!
723 Sabrina March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: Pick me! Also your tour needs to come to the Maryland area!!
724 CeeCee Knight March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: I, personally, am not surprised that the people who came out to see you smelled like cupcakes and magnificence. After all, like attracts like.
725 Tina March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: PLEASE COME TO CANADA!!!!
726 Randilea March 14, 2013 at 5:21 pm: Yes please! I have your book as an ebook but would love a paper copy one!
727 Susan March 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm: Oh! We’re looking for a badass addition to the silent auction to benefit my daughter’s school – this would be awesome. Also, I didn’t visit you in Paramus because I didn’t want to give you the horrible virus I had. Sorry, I would have bought a copy and had you autograph it for the auction if I hadn’t been sick.
728 Alyssa Brock March 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm: I discovered your blog recently while I was staying with my daughter in the hospital for 3 days because she had just been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. Reading it really brightened my days. I can’t wait to read your book!
729 Tina March 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm: I’d squee all over the place if I won!

I already have the kindle version, but an autographed copy is much more cuddly.
730 Karin March 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm: Incredible! You are amazing, woman! Oh, and I want an autographed copy. Please and thank you.
Karin recently posted..Donna Day 2013. Let’s Do This.
731 Catherine@55 March 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm: Ok. I want a copy of your book so much I’m leaving another comment. I scrolled through the comments twice. I don’t see my original one, but I am not surprised. I have legitimate issues which shall remain nameless.

Like I said in my original comment, I will totally be buying the current one if you don’t pick me, because I love you, and again, you’re welcome.
732 Liz March 14, 2013 at 5:22 pm: STUFFED ALBINO GROUNDHOG!!!!!!! Did I catch your attention?! I have shared your book with a couple friends already and sent copies to some others. I would love, love, love a copy with the extra chapter but I haven’t made it to the book store to see if the Canadians were privy to that bonus or not. In the meantime I’m trying to convince some friends to help me procure a “piece” for your menagerie collection… My husband is thus far unimpressed and I’m sure yours will be even less (insert evil laughter here)|
PS thank you so much for your link a couple weeks ago to the kid taking in blades – that led me to discover the “To This Day” project and it has been a life changing discovery. Thank you.
733 Teeny Bikini March 14, 2013 at 5:23 pm: That is so so awesome. I am happy for you. You go girl!
Teeny Bikini recently posted..Too Much Nipple
734 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 5:23 pm: Of course you are #5 on the NYT. You are made of awesome. Congrats!
735 JenniferR March 14, 2013 at 5:23 pm: Yeah I think I’m gonna need one of those!!! Pick me!!!
736 Danni March 14, 2013 at 5:23 pm: I love your book so much and am so happy for your success. You deserve it!
737 Amanda March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: My best friend introduced you to me. I absolutely LOVE your wit and humor. Also, your real life experiences. Thank you!
738 Rikki March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: You are fabulous! The King of all Grimaces!
739 Mandy March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: Oh please please please pick me! Your book is the ultimate friend test. My office mate and I bonded over it… Which I am fairly certain is the reason no one else wants to talk to us. Not that they ignore us, per se. They’re just not on board with our implementation of more interesting policies, like the cursing hour, or that if someone sniffles, you’re obligated to make a joke about a coke problem. That’s fine though; they’re not Unicorn Success Club material anyway. There’s a proverb like that, right?
740 Jean Burke March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: You rock…..would love to win it!
741 Megan M. March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: Ooh me! Because the 703rd comment (at the time of this writing) always wins!
742 Jenn J. March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: Good for you!
Jenn J. recently posted..Thoughts on the Great Chicken Debacle
743 PJS March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: You rock!
744 Ashley March 14, 2013 at 5:24 pm: Books!
745 Torie March 14, 2013 at 5:25 pm: pick me pick me!! I’m dying to read it, it’s been a slow miserable death! I’m too cheap to buy it, I’m actually considering breaking down & doing so. We were sending it around, but somehow it never made it. It made it from Korea to SoCal, only had a short trip to NorCal, but still hasn’t left SoCal
746 Martha Mullins March 14, 2013 at 5:25 pm: We thank you – for being one of the bravest, most real people on the planet.
We heart you large.
747 Colleen March 14, 2013 at 5:25 pm: Pick me! I wanna read an extra chapter!
748 RandiH March 14, 2013 at 5:25 pm: Congratulations! I’m so glad that all of your adoring fans (myself included) turned out and supported you and your book
749 Lindsay Barker March 14, 2013 at 5:26 pm: Since you refuse to tour near me, shouldn’t I get a book? Please? I’ll show you my best pout…..
750 zarya March 14, 2013 at 5:26 pm: Would love a signed copy..lent mine to a frien.nd who won’t give it back (lol)
751 Robin2go March 14, 2013 at 5:26 pm: Oh bonus chapter, come to me, your poor, your faithful, your hamsterless hoards. Or, you know, whatev.
Robin2go recently posted..Keeping a boy’s dream alive.
752 Dana March 14, 2013 at 5:26 pm: I would love a signed copy!
753 Melisa @ Just Begin From Here March 14, 2013 at 5:26 pm: Come on, come on! Big money! No whammies…..stop!
Melisa @ Just Begin From Here recently posted..living on the edge: then vs. now.
754 Allison March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: I looooove you! And your badass, mildly offensive, completely hilarious book. And blog.
755 Kelly March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: Oooh ooh!! Pick me, pick me!!
Kelly recently posted..Sooo….. Umm…. Happy New Year and some junk….
756 Leslie March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: Since i have only met you electronically, I only have your book on iPad, and thus you should pick me for one of the actual books to prove your love me, because nothing says love like two people who have bonded over the desire to have Harry Potter lightning bold episiotomy scars. Our friendship should be sealed in a tangible way. Although I do have one of the little cardboard Hamlet schwags that I copped from the local bookstore in exchange for writing a review that said, “Read this shit, y’all!”
Leslie recently posted..Lectionary Notes 2/24 2 Lent C
757 FrogLady March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: OOOOOH – pick me!! pick me!! *stretching had waaaay up and jumping*
758 Angbachand March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: Seriously… Canada look into it! We love you up here too!
759 Meredith March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: Now chances are that I’m not as cool as any one of the previous 709 people (good luck combing all these) but I share your posts all the time and it makes me feel fantastic that i have friends that get me(and you) and hopeful for my future in this crazy world we call life. I’d love a book, sister.
760 melinda March 14, 2013 at 5:27 pm: I neeeeeeeeeeedddd another copy. F’real.
761 Nestor Villa March 14, 2013 at 5:28 pm: A signed copy of your book would make me sound just like a that poor hamster!! And I still see no vegas on the tour :’(
762 Shelley Abrams March 14, 2013 at 5:28 pm: Please consider one for my boss Amanda Tirman. She turned us all on to your blog. She would be over the moon with a copy.
763 D March 14, 2013 at 5:28 pm: Saw you at your Miami stop on the first leg of the tour. Met two other people alone, nervous, unsure, and left with them both being amazing friends. They have literally saved my life and we owe our misfit sisterhood all to you. <3
764 Robin P. March 14, 2013 at 5:29 pm: Ooh, I’d love one!
765 Angie - Martinis Needed March 14, 2013 at 5:29 pm: This is my favorite way to get what I want.

http://youtu.be/Dj3GH5myc3M
Angie – Martinis Needed recently posted..Living Life on a Budget
766 Erin March 14, 2013 at 5:29 pm: I don’t have the book, but I want it, so you should pick me. I would have it, but I am one of those old students that young students hate, and my school books are stupidly expensive.
767 Jen March 14, 2013 at 5:29 pm: Pretty please may I have (win?) a copy?!? Promise not to sell it on eBay!
768 Amy Anderson March 14, 2013 at 5:30 pm: Ooh! Ohh! Mr. Kottah! Mr. Kottah! Ooh! Pick me!
769 Anne Morris March 14, 2013 at 5:30 pm: I’m so thrilled with your book that I wanted to give mine to the local impoverished library. But wait, then I’d be giving mine away! Oh dear. Maybe you’ll make Mother Teresa look even worse by giving one to me for the library (or to Butte County Library-Chico directly).

Incidentally, we’re not “that” California. We’re the poor relations up near Oregon.

In any case, thank you so much for such a great read.
Anne Morris
Chico, California
770 qwertygirl March 14, 2013 at 5:30 pm: Ooo! Me! Me! Call on me! Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!
771 Megan March 14, 2013 at 5:30 pm: Oooo pick me! Pick me!
Megan recently posted..danieldaylewis:

Richard Armitage photographed by Robert…
772 Kristen Mae at Abandoning Pretense March 14, 2013 at 5:30 pm: OMG I WANT ONE!!!!! I only buy books from Goodwill. Which makes me kind of a hypocritical book supporter since I’m not technically supporting the book industry. I am helping the less fortunate, though!

God only knows how long it will take for your book to end up on the shelves of Goodwill. Your fans are such die-hards, they probably set up shrines around your book, enclosed in vacuum-sealed glass cases. =)
Kristen Mae at Abandoning Pretense recently posted..Pepsi Can Bite Me, But Now I Want a Camaro – Yes, THAT Video
773 Allison March 14, 2013 at 5:30 pm: I’d love an autographed copy! I’d sleep with it under my pillow! Seriously, you’re the best.
Allison recently posted..Music for Cool People: 3/8/13
774 Laura March 14, 2013 at 5:31 pm: I need you to come to NOVA DC area. I’m new here and having trouble finding my tribe!! I’d be ok with signed book too.
775 Neena Levi March 14, 2013 at 5:32 pm: Plannin’ to see you in San Jose in a few weeks!
776 kam March 14, 2013 at 5:33 pm: Please please please!!!!!! I can hardly wait to read the extra chapter!
777 Chrysalis March 14, 2013 at 5:33 pm: Would love an autographed copy… would be almost as good as having you come to Australia.
Chrysalis recently posted..Sanguine Sunday: A Look Back On January
778 Leslie March 14, 2013 at 5:33 pm: I read your book while visiting my daughter and became a Jenny convert. Now I need my own copy to spread the word!
779 Angela Wicentowich March 14, 2013 at 5:33 pm: I “lent” my copy to my mother and she hasn’t returned it, so I would LOVE a signed copy. Enjoy the rest of your tour.
780 cocobean March 14, 2013 at 5:33 pm: mememe – and I hope to see you next week!!!
781 patsy fos March 14, 2013 at 5:34 pm: I would love to have the book..
782 Sandy March 14, 2013 at 5:34 pm: I was just introduced to you this past weekend when some friends were sharing the story of Beyonce. I nearly pee’d my pants from laughing! I have shared your stories several times since and made many people laugh nearly has hard as I did. My friends and are so excited about your book and plan to start a book club with your book being our first read! Thank you for being you and sharing your stories, they are magnificent!
783 Stacie March 14, 2013 at 5:34 pm: I currently smell like guacamole and lime tortilla chips. Am I still allowed to win?
784 Mary March 14, 2013 at 5:34 pm: I have a copy, but want a paperback to get the new additions! Great book!
785 Tanya March 14, 2013 at 5:35 pm: Technically I already own your book… I then lent it to a friend so she could also fall in weird internet love with you. She gave it back but I want to read your bonus chapter and then pass it along to the next lucky friend who will get to discover you!
Tanya recently posted..Ask Luis #1
786 Jeanette March 14, 2013 at 5:35 pm: Oh dear lord how I wish I could have been there! Being in Virginia however, doesn’t really lend itself to getting to one of the tour locales. But I could totally use more friends like you. Not that we know each other, even though I feel like I know you. Anyway…rambling…oh look…something shiny!
787 Kila March 14, 2013 at 5:35 pm: Woohoo, congrats! Your book resides in my keep library. I plan to be there if you ever make it to San Diego.
788 CeeGee March 14, 2013 at 5:36 pm: Hey- I’m pretty sure there’s a gal back there who doesn’t have a book in her hand! Isn’t that illegal? Or maybe just rude – like going to someone’s house for dinner and NOT bringing wine. Or bringing cheap wine. Home made wine. Anyway, it’s my birthday next week and I asked for the book. I’m pretty sure I’ll get it and don’t really need the free book, but it would be awesome and kind of piss off a certain someone who recently re-gifted the wine I brought as a hostess gift.
789 fushigifox March 14, 2013 at 5:36 pm: Congratulations, really great news to hear. Hope someday to visit the States and catch one of your tours. Wishful thinking. Love and hugs from Japan!
790 Julie Douglass March 14, 2013 at 5:36 pm: Grad student spending book money on textbooks eagerly awaiting your blog posts to break up epic study sessions wishes to be thrown into the running to be gifted your awesome book!
791 Cindy March 14, 2013 at 5:36 pm: I almost never leave my hometown but I totally planned on driving four hours to see you in Dayton. Unfortunately, I have to stay home with my niece and nephew because my brother is going to a wedding in Texas. I don’t know if I could bring the kids with me all that way. They are 1 and 2 years old. Maybe you could release a scroll version of the book, or a stone tablet version. Then you can tour again and help get me out of the house. I would totally come out to have you sign my stone tablet.
792 Angela March 14, 2013 at 5:37 pm: I don’t think I smell like a cupcake….or magnificence, but…

Congrats on all of your success…you make me laugh almost every day!!!!
793 Tara Gado March 14, 2013 at 5:37 pm: I love your book!!! Wherever I read it … I cracked up… And people thought I was crazy!!! I’d love the paperback. Can’t wait to see you again. Come to CT!!
794 Rose March 14, 2013 at 5:37 pm: Pick me please! I am a HUGE fan. I bought the book on my kindle and would love a paperback copy (and BONUS chapter) but can’t afford to buy it right now. Extremely sad face. Keep up the good work – you are an inspiration!
795 Nikki March 14, 2013 at 5:37 pm: Pick me or I’ll cry like I just watched one of those ASPCA commercials with Sarah McLachlan!
796 Bonnie March 14, 2013 at 5:37 pm: You did the hard work. We’re just enjoying the ride!
797 Jamie March 14, 2013 at 5:38 pm: Pick me! I wish you were coming to So Cal again so I could meet you a second time! XOXO
798 Mike (Firefighter in MN) March 14, 2013 at 5:38 pm: I wrote a song declaring my undying love for Jane Espenson and posted it for the world.

Where does that get me on the book list?

Or Jane, for that matter. Although I have to believe that if Jane Espenson called you and said, ‘Hey, I need me a book!’ you’d be all like, ‘Of course you can have a book, you created the Phantom Dennis.’

And then the world would collapse into a critical mass of awesome and none could escape it’s pull.

Not even light or gravity.
799 Patricia March 14, 2013 at 5:38 pm: Monkey Monkey Underpants! I wanna Win!!!!
800 DC5G March 14, 2013 at 5:38 pm: Have had a year of down days and I love reading your blog as a pick me up…can only imagine what the book would do for my mood! I sooooo need to read it!
801 Cindi March 14, 2013 at 5:38 pm: I have the Kindle version, the Hardcover, the Audible version. I adore you and would LOVE to have a signed copy! I obviously have issues. :-/
802 Dolores March 14, 2013 at 5:38 pm: You’re welcome…and I want a book!
Dolores recently posted..There’s a new pope, and he speaks Spanish.
803 Heather/muirnait March 14, 2013 at 5:39 pm: Well THAT would be completely freakin awesome, so yes please
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804 Mike (Firefighter in MN) March 14, 2013 at 5:39 pm: wrong form of ‘its’ in my last. How embarrassing.
805 Kathleen March 14, 2013 at 5:39 pm: Okay I was going to be selfish and say pick me pleeeease, but I think Tracey in Australia deserves it since she can’t even get an unsigned copy! Pick her, pleeease!
806 Sam March 14, 2013 at 5:39 pm: OOH, PICK ME PICK ME! *channeling her inner Donkey* The Shrek character. Not that I’m an ass. Generally.
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807 Gigi March 14, 2013 at 5:40 pm: Jenny! I’m so happy for you and your success! You deserve EVERY SINGLE BIT OF IT!!!!
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808 Stephani March 14, 2013 at 5:40 pm: The chicken post got me hooked. I cried and snorted. I want a book!!!
809 emily March 14, 2013 at 5:41 pm: Pick me, pick me! Unless you are going to be giving away a taxidermied dead animal soon, and winning a copy of your book would disqualify me from winning said dead thing. Then please pass me by. Because I really want a dead thing in a costume, and you can’t buy that at a bookstore.
810 Jodi March 14, 2013 at 5:41 pm: I live in Colorado. I don’t smoke pot. I live vicariously through the stories of the misdeeds of others. Books are my drugs. Would LOVE a signed copy of yours…or the rooster. I would definitely take the rooster
811 Rachel B March 14, 2013 at 5:42 pm: Oh, oh, oh. Please? I’m going on 1.5 years unemployed & have not yet been able to buy a copy. But, OH! I really do want to read it.
812 Rene D March 14, 2013 at 5:42 pm: Please pick me and my gnome! We would be so happy.
Rene D recently posted..Norm Plays Tourist in Seattle
813 Ellen March 14, 2013 at 5:43 pm: That is amazing news! Congrats to you. I don’t have your book yet.. To be honest, I’m a cheap ass!
Ellen recently posted..Number 8…
814 Candice March 14, 2013 at 5:43 pm: I read my sister-in-law’s copy over Christmas, but I need one of my own!!!!!
815 Nunu March 14, 2013 at 5:43 pm: Pick me! Because I can’t come and see you as I live in New Zealand – unless you want to start a world tour?
816 Angie March 14, 2013 at 5:44 pm: I would really love a copy of your book to give to a friend who had a really rough year, and needs a chance to laugh and find hope and other people who feel the same way she does.
817 Katie March 14, 2013 at 5:44 pm: So wish I could see you on this round of tour dates. Would love to read that bonus chapter!
Katie recently posted..“This is my favorite place, my worry slips away…”
818 Stickboy March 14, 2013 at 5:44 pm: Our friends sent us your book out of the blue last week via Amazon with the suggestion that I read it to my wife (who is perfectly capable of reading but deems it to taxing). I didn’t have a clue who you were but zoomed through it in a weekend (in between chapters of book 5 of A Game of Thrones – talk about a dichotomy!) Sure I rolled my eyes at times but what a great read! Thanks!
819 ellemichelle March 14, 2013 at 5:45 pm: fuckit! i know i won’t actually win, but i’ll play anyway.

i never win anything…….
820 Stephanie Wilson March 14, 2013 at 5:45 pm: I gave my hardback copy to a family member who recently found out she has cancer. I knew giving her your stories would cheer her up but I need another copy!
Stephanie Wilson recently posted..Nerd is the Word
821 Christina K March 14, 2013 at 5:45 pm: That is so great! Hopefully it will make it to number 1!
822 Rachelle Nesta March 14, 2013 at 5:45 pm: You are fantastic! I wish you were coming to the Seattle area so that I could come see you!
823 Laura March 14, 2013 at 5:45 pm: Your book is amazing and made me think my mental musings aren’t that odd….ok…maybe they still are odd but I am not alone. I am just not a writer and more of a reader so your book is perfect. Pick me!!
824 jewahe March 14, 2013 at 5:46 pm: Leaving a comment …
825 Pamela March 14, 2013 at 5:46 pm: Congratulations on all your success! And thank you for making me laugh — at occasionally inappropriate times, but still.
826 Joan Pucino March 14, 2013 at 5:46 pm: Bloggess: your paperback. need. want. must have!
827 Wendy Dente March 14, 2013 at 5:47 pm: Pick the Australian! And then me….. because then I can pretend we are friends all over again just like the first time I read it…..
828 Heather March 14, 2013 at 5:47 pm: I’m coming to see you in Cincinnati, and I’m going to be one of the nervous ones! So pick me, especially because I’ll buy another one that night for you to sign! Yay!
829 Beccav March 14, 2013 at 5:47 pm: Awesome! I don’t have the paperback yet so I would love a copy!
830 Kim March 14, 2013 at 5:47 pm: I never win anything, but why not try….and GO, JENNY!!!!
831 Kate March 14, 2013 at 5:47 pm: If you pick me, I will donate the book to my daughter’s elementary school auction. This may or may not be done anonymously. If you don’t pick me, I will not be offended in the least.
832 Amber flora March 14, 2013 at 5:48 pm: You show me it is ok to a little (or a lot) weird. Thank you!
833 Gin March 14, 2013 at 5:48 pm: Pick me!! PICK MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Gin recently posted..I’m Getting Around!!
834 tokenblogger March 14, 2013 at 5:48 pm: Pick me! Pick me!
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835 T. A. Woods March 14, 2013 at 5:48 pm: *raises hand* If you send me a copy, then I’ll have a reason to leave my house.
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836 Tyler Risk March 14, 2013 at 5:49 pm: I was at the airport this past weekend in one of the shops and a lady was looking at all the books trying to pick one out. Yours was right in front of me so I picked it up and told her if she was looking for something good to read, this would be the book. She asked if it would make her laugh out loud… I told her it would most definitely!
837 Carolyn March 14, 2013 at 5:49 pm: I’ve given many, many copies of the book as a litmus test for friends. If they don’t call me in tears, rolling on the floor laughing, I have serious concerns about their friend longevity. Congratulations!
838 Lynne Wesenberg March 14, 2013 at 5:49 pm: YOU are AWESOME!!! <3
839 rainbowg March 14, 2013 at 5:49 pm: May the random number generator be ever in my favor.
Thanks for all you do Jenny.
840 Stephanie March 14, 2013 at 5:49 pm: Me me me me me me me me me me!
841 kathy March 14, 2013 at 5:50 pm: Pace yourself, girlie. Have fun and take good care!
842 Ashley March 14, 2013 at 5:50 pm: Instead of “pick me, pick me!”, I am going to tell you a story. One day, due to the spontaneous relocation of peanuts, my coworker ascertained that she had a mouse living in her office. To make herself more comfortable with this new reality, she named the mouse Chuck. Her boss set a not-nice trap for said mouse, which she promptly un-set. I relayed this story to my almost- four year old daughter, who has had the following advice for my coworker. “Look under the desks, and around the chairs and under the heater. Is Chuck a boy or a girl? I think he’s a boy. What’s the rest of his name? How about Sally? Chuck Sally. Yeah. Oh, and if he’s hard to catch, you could use your paws to grab his tail. I have a smart forehead, so I could help.” You should send me a signed paperback, because I must be cool, since I am clearly raising a very cool kid. The end.
843 Shaun H March 14, 2013 at 5:51 pm: Oh oh oh, Pick me!
844 Nancy Rhodes March 14, 2013 at 5:51 pm: I’m in North Virginia and would LOVE to win …I’ve felt really stabby lately and I think reading it in hard copy instead of on my little iPod (not even an iPad) would be AMAZING and lead to me not feeling so stabby. And less nearsighted.
845 Melissa Dunn March 14, 2013 at 5:51 pm: Pick me , pick me!
846 Lizz March 14, 2013 at 5:52 pm: Ohhhhh me, please! I don’t even have one copy yet, because I’m a) poor and b) behind on my reading.
Lizz recently posted..I Am Not a Ballerina
847 Tracey Hanlin Rohr March 14, 2013 at 5:52 pm: My (your) library book is due the 22nd. I’ll see you Tuesday the 19th in Dayton. You can give me my free book then.
848 Mary March 14, 2013 at 5:52 pm: I would love one!
849 Susan March 14, 2013 at 5:52 pm: *waving hand frantically in the air a’ la Arnold Horshack* Me, me, me! Pick me! Pleaaassseeee!!!!
850 Melissa March 14, 2013 at 5:52 pm: Congrats on the continued success of your book!
851 Shelley March 14, 2013 at 5:53 pm: Oh, mememememememememeeee!
852 Nancy Raine Smego March 14, 2013 at 5:53 pm: Was that picture in Naperville, IL? I LOVE YOU SO!
853 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 5:54 pm: You’re so awesome! I want a paperback with extra chapter! Heck, I just want the extra chapter!!!!!!!
854 Julie March 14, 2013 at 5:54 pm: Pick me! Pick me!!! Please come to San Antonio!!
855 Misty March 14, 2013 at 5:54 pm: I love paperbacks. They are my favorite. Yes, please.

Oh, and congrats. Much deserved.
Misty recently posted..The Big Reveal
856 Chelsea March 14, 2013 at 5:55 pm: Loved the book the first time and can’t wait to read the second one! Super sad I had to miss the tour in NY!
857 Leila Maisonneuve March 14, 2013 at 5:55 pm: Me! Me! Pick me! I neeeed this…really. Ummm…I have six kids…only tiny grains of my dignity and sanity left. And, I’m nice. But, not too nice. Plenty of sarcasm here. But, not mean. Not really. Uh…I like your hair?
Leila Maisonneuve recently posted..Heartbreak again and again
858 Heather March 14, 2013 at 5:55 pm: Oo oo pick me! Pick me! I want to read that bonus chapter!
859 lysette March 14, 2013 at 5:55 pm: I am so excited to re-read and read the bonus chapter!! Congratulations! I took your hardcover to a party to loan to the hostess and everybody there pawed through it
860 Elizabeth March 14, 2013 at 5:56 pm: Pick me, pick me!
861 Linda March 14, 2013 at 5:56 pm: In July, when Google Reader goes away, I will still visit your website everyday. Yup, you are a keeper!
862 Annette March 14, 2013 at 5:56 pm: I gave a book to a friend from high school who was having a bad time of it – guess what, it made her laugh, which is what she partially needed, and made her realize that we are not alone, which is what she really needed. You have the best superpower of all, spreading joy and hope, in case you needed a reminder. Congrats!
863 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 5:57 pm: I would love to have a copy of your book! After reading it, I realized that someone else in the world felt exactly the way I do. I wasn’t alone anymore. Thank you for that.
864 Sharene Zemanek March 14, 2013 at 5:57 pm: Pick me because I’m going through a terrible divorce and heroin withdrawal and I have a bad case of ingrown ass hair and a gazillion giant whitehead zits and I’m middle aged with two small children and a stretch marked gunt so I REALLY need the laughs! …well, only the last three are actually accurate. But they are good enough reasons, right? And I’m Canadian. So you will be giving away a book to a sophisticated foreigner that loves to guzzle beer and wear gum boots.
865 Melinda March 14, 2013 at 5:57 pm: Funny for a book? The new Pope is 76. We could have two guys in the Old Pope’s Home soon.
866 Lynn March 14, 2013 at 5:57 pm: Congrats! You are amazing! Thank you for making me (and all of us) laugh!
867 Jessie Pants March 14, 2013 at 5:58 pm: I’m a grad student and I’ve almost completely lost the ability to read for pleasure and fun. Help me Bloggess, you’re my only hope!
868 Sheryl Boerding March 14, 2013 at 5:59 pm: It doesn’t matter if I win, I just think you rock! And I wish I could be more like you! You are an inspiration! I just wish you came with the book so I could hear your stories told by you- the one at the book store in St. Louis was AWESOME!
869 Kristen Y. March 14, 2013 at 6:00 pm: I loved your book. Seriously, was reading while stuck in limbo at an airport in a country where I don’t speak the language for 3 days in order to maintain my sanity. Thank you for that.
870 Katrina March 14, 2013 at 6:00 pm: To receive a signed copy of your book would prolly be the most exciting moment of life! Seriously, I’m pretty boring so this would be awesome.
871 Jolene March 14, 2013 at 6:01 pm: Pick meeeeeeeeee! I bought your book but if I had an autographed copy, I could donate the old one! Or maybe not donate as much as pick a girl who really really needs a laugh. P.s. my phone tried to autocorrect donate to “fondue.” It’s clearly my phone.
Jolene recently posted..Apparently, I’m a lot to take. (Alternative title: I will be your light.)
872 Carie March 14, 2013 at 6:02 pm: pick me! pick me! I have got to get this book…
873 Amanda March 14, 2013 at 6:03 pm: I just got a new apartment and am totally in need of a coaster!
874 Valerie March 14, 2013 at 6:03 pm: Congrats on your success!
875 Dawn March 14, 2013 at 6:03 pm: I wanna read the bonus chapter! Please oh please, pick me!
876 Anna Crossley March 14, 2013 at 6:03 pm: I’ve been dying to read your book, but I am like # bazillion on the request list at the library, and I am poor. Your story about Beyonce made me popular at work for a day, which was was sooo exciting, since I am a school librarian and the only time they notice me usually is when I am late for yard duty, so thanks for being hilarious, heartfelt and a truth teller. If you ever come to Ottawa, ON, Canada, we have snow – and crazy people.
877 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 6:04 pm: Thank you for bringing this tribe together!
878 Janice March 14, 2013 at 6:05 pm: I’m so sad I’m not near any of the tour spots, it seems this is a community of my people!
I’m proud of you Jenny for doing this despite your anxiety, and maybe because of it. We all love you. Thank you.
879 faith March 14, 2013 at 6:05 pm: ooooh…I so want a copy. It’s not available yet here in Canada. I lent my hard cover version to my sister-in-law…who never returned it. Bitch!
880 Julie the Wife March 14, 2013 at 6:05 pm: I usually joke here, but honestly, you are amazing. You are such a fruit salad of traits that everyone finds a little part of themselves here, but gets along with the other fruits as well. Until those fucking Kiwis show up, and then I’m out.
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881 over the hill mom March 14, 2013 at 6:06 pm: Would love to have it- the hardback copy that I had has gone to be with another blog-obsessed lady so I would LOVE to have the paperback! Would love to read the extra chapter and would love to laugh alll over again about how much fun your family is! Am thrilled that all of those awesome people turned out at your book signing. I wish you would come to my neck of the woods!
882 Elaine Turcan March 14, 2013 at 6:06 pm: Give me the damn book.
883 Jess March 14, 2013 at 6:06 pm: I love you Jenny! And not in a creepy stalker kind of way, but in that I totally get hiding in the bathroom kind of way. Thank you for bringing such an awesome tribe of people together.
Jess recently posted..Hi, *waves* remember me?
884 rissatoo March 14, 2013 at 6:06 pm: Oh, Jenny. It’s you and your wonderful way with words and feelings and finding the absurd that did it. We just finally all found you. Thank goodness.

Huggles,
rissatoo
885 Zan March 14, 2013 at 6:07 pm: You’re the GREATEST, I am so happy for you! (This is a boring comment but I want to be in the running for the books) (But I am genuinely really happy for you!)
886 Dgoldie March 14, 2013 at 6:07 pm: Crap on a crap cracker!
887 Janderon March 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm: Oh, I so wish you were coming to a bookstore close to me!
888 Erin March 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm: Since I can’t come see you, having an autographed copy of your book would ALMOST make it better. Almost.
889 michele March 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm: Pick me pick meeeeee!
890 Melissa March 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm: Congrats! That is awesome. I have recommended your book to a crazy number of people, but I would freaking love to win a signed copy. Here’s to fellow Whovians everywhere!
891 Amy K March 14, 2013 at 6:09 pm: I was sad when I had to return your book to the library last week, so a paperback copy of my very own would be awesome! Congratulations on your continued (and deserved) success.
892 Erin March 14, 2013 at 6:09 pm: Congrats!!! Your book is truly hilarious. I’m making everyone I know read it.
Erin recently posted..Spying on the neighbors. (at Yarmouth, ME)
893 Jenx Byron March 14, 2013 at 6:09 pm: A very good friend of mine gave me your book. She knows me very well. I literally screamed with laughter. I got it on the Kindle, so I’d love to have a paperback copy, so that I can see the pictures. Thank you for being awesome.
Jenx Byron recently posted..Real Life Can Sometimes Be a Good Thing, Too!
894 Jessica March 14, 2013 at 6:09 pm: Congratulations, Madame Bloggess! I really wish I could have made it to one of your book tour stops because I love your book and you are awesome. I’d love to read the extra chapter!
895 Robin of Locksley March 14, 2013 at 6:11 pm: So looking forward to reading the bonus chapter! Love you, Jenny!
896 Gail Karuna-Vetter March 14, 2013 at 6:11 pm: I know the odds are against me, but I’m hoping you pick me anyway! <3
I can't afford to buy your book right now… but I will own it one day whether you pick me or not!
897 Cindy March 14, 2013 at 6:11 pm: While I’ve given the book away as gifts, I don’t actually have a copy of my own! Please pick me!!!!!
898 Julie March 14, 2013 at 6:12 pm: Thanks for sharing your wacky, someone demented sense of humor with us. The last 9 months I’ve had a sick little girl, and when I was at my darkest, your sick sense of humor always made me smile. Thank you and congratulations!
899 Melissa Vose March 14, 2013 at 6:13 pm: I’m dying to read the bonus chapter! I’m a huge fan!! =)
900 Olivia March 14, 2013 at 6:13 pm: Jenny, not that I would resort to bribery, but I’d you picked me, I’d gladly bring “Caryonce” to you at your Louisville signing. Just saying.
901 Jan D'Arcy March 14, 2013 at 6:13 pm: Please pick me! I loved your hardcover book so much that I passed it along…
902 Lea March 14, 2013 at 6:14 pm: I want to read the new chapter!!! You consistently make me laugh, so thanks regardless.
903 Kim March 14, 2013 at 6:14 pm: Pick me! I want to read the bonus chapter!
904 Paige March 14, 2013 at 6:15 pm: Oh Jenny! I would be thrilled to receive a copy! Your book scared my wife silly several different times. Well, not the book itself, but the noises of hilarity radiating from me at random times. So for that matter, your blog scares her as well. She can tell when I’m reading it. I kind of make the walls vibrate. Supposedly. I hope your very own eyes are reading this so you truly TRULY know how much I adore you. Because I DO. *nods emphatically* XOXOXOXO (because life it too short not to send HUGS and KISSES at every opportunity!)
905 Laura Witek March 14, 2013 at 6:15 pm: I didn’t know about you when the book first came out so would love a copy of this one – but either way I just want you to know how many times your posts have made my day when I really needed a smile. And how many times I shared them with my hubby and we laughed till tears ran down and our teenage girls just looked at us all screwy eyed LOL Thanks for the laughs!!!!
906 Jenny March 14, 2013 at 6:15 pm: Not only do you have tons of support in physical life, but check out all the comments! It’s so wonderful to see your success (now, if only you’d come to my dinky town that’s farther north than most Canadians…).
907 Katherine March 14, 2013 at 6:16 pm: You’re the one who’s made us realize that we all belong to the same tribe
908 Michelle Chartrand March 14, 2013 at 6:18 pm: thank YOU for combining 2 of my favourite things – reading and you!
909 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 6:18 pm: Wahoo! So exciting! You’re the bomb! (non-explosive type of course)
910 Kristin March 14, 2013 at 6:18 pm: I truly need a copy. I read your book, lent it to a friend, and it moved to Florida with her.
Kristin recently posted..When Good Appliances Go Bad
911 Janna Hopkins March 14, 2013 at 6:19 pm: I need a paperback. And it’s autographed. I have the hard back but it’ll be lonely without the paperback. Love the book!
912 Corinne A. March 14, 2013 at 6:19 pm: Your book is on my reading list! IT WILL BE MINE.
Corinne A. recently posted..Dear (Former) Facebook Friend
913 Kat Smitho March 14, 2013 at 6:20 pm: You are more awesome then a trunk filled with Labrador puppies.
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914 Laurel March 14, 2013 at 6:20 pm: Congratulations. Would love a copy to share with some of my fellow book clubbers.
915 heedlynn March 14, 2013 at 6:20 pm: I have actually eaten duvet whilst reading so as not to wake my husband as I was laughing so much, didn’t work he woke up thinking I was having a fit – priceless. Come visit the UK
916 Cookie March 14, 2013 at 6:20 pm: I’m so proud of you. The accomplishment and acceptance and outreach of it all.
The next best thing to meeting you would be seeing you, but since I’m not on your tour, the next best thing would be receiving a book from you. I’d be ever-grateful and probably end up reading most of it out loud to my husband. I make him listen. Thank you for everything.
917 Barbara March 14, 2013 at 6:20 pm: Ive already read your hardcover, but would love to read the extra chapter!
918 Gena D March 14, 2013 at 6:21 pm: I definitely need a paperback copy of your book because I won’t allow my husband to put his grubby hands on my autographed hardcover copy! He really needs to read it though. He still feels alone in his daily fight with depression.
919 Melissa March 14, 2013 at 6:21 pm: A part of the bizarre tribe? You are the leader Jenny, never forget that! Plus, pick me for the book! Pretty please?
920 Katie March 14, 2013 at 6:21 pm: Congratulations! Planning on getting your book soon!
921 Katie March 14, 2013 at 6:22 pm: I really really want to win this because I preordered the Kindle version of the book when it was first listed on Amazon and I loved it, but now there is a whole chapter I didn’t get to read, and I think I need a real bookcase version so people will see it and I can tell them they HAVE to read it. There. That’s my entry.
922 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 6:22 pm: I LOVE your book! My friend and I quote different parts of it randomly, and laugh so much we almost pee. Thank you for writing! The world needs more of your stories.
923 KaraB March 14, 2013 at 6:22 pm: Love the book! You deserve all this good stuff!!
KaraB recently posted..Cardinals and Conclaves and Smoke, Oh my!
924 Anne March 14, 2013 at 6:22 pm: Awwwww … That’s also the sound my cats make when I hug them too tight. Personally I don’t think you can hug too tight, but opinions vary. Congrats on the book!!!!
925 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 6:23 pm: Of course I want a copy of the book, but I also would like you to let go of the imaginary hamster now. I have this Lenny from “Mice and Men” image in my head that I just can’t shake.
926 tony d March 14, 2013 at 6:23 pm: i’d love to read it, and i love your work, but i read the hardcover (from the library, because I’m unemployed). but i know there are those more deserving than me. so i’ll just say, i’ll be your best friend ANYWAYS, because that’s how I roll.
927 Michelle P March 14, 2013 at 6:24 pm: I picked up your book and started reading it in Chapters, while waiting for my daughter to shop. I had to change seats 3 times because of the looks people were giving me, and even ‘shushing’ me when I guffawed out loud once….or twice! (okay, maybe a few times)

Oh – and I agree with Melissa’s comment about strapless bras.
928 Jen March 14, 2013 at 6:24 pm: Yay, the new book! #5 is so amazing!
Jen recently posted..Roller Derby Benefits Glen Highland Border Collie Rescue
929 Koren March 14, 2013 at 6:24 pm: Comment! Pick me!
930 Chelsea Jeffries March 14, 2013 at 6:24 pm: I haven’t purchased a copy yet personally, (I plan too, ) but I do encourage everyone to ask their local library to purchase a copy or two! That is actually how I even found out about all this in the first place and now I’m listening to the audio book with my mother! Just as good the second time around and it’s awesome to be able to hear Jenny read the book! Thanks!
931 Susan March 14, 2013 at 6:24 pm: I don’t know if I should be picked… but I would love a copy! Seeing as my library doesn’t have it, and I can’t afford a copy.
932 Jaclyn March 14, 2013 at 6:25 pm: Pick me! Pick me! I have nothing funny or awesome to say! But pick me anyway!
933 Clara Kelley March 14, 2013 at 6:26 pm: I would LOVE a book, for real!
Clara Kelley recently posted..The Flowers Appear
934 Susan March 14, 2013 at 6:26 pm: I could die happy if I had an autographed copy! What does that say about my life? Do I have low standards? Or is your book just that awesome? Only one way to find out.
Susan recently posted..A Week-Long Wedding Celebration
935 Sharon March 14, 2013 at 6:26 pm: I have a copy of the book in digital format (yay for $2 Boxing week sales), but I would LOVE to have an actual, physical paperback copy of my own. Your signature would be icing on the cake!
936 gogo March 14, 2013 at 6:26 pm: Oh I cannot afford a new book (seriously how sad is that!) but so want to read the new chapter. I was surprised my tiny little library had a copy of the hardcover cause for most books I really want to read, I have to wait till the book is out a year so I can ask for it through interlibrary loan.
937 Taylor March 14, 2013 at 6:27 pm: Would love another copy for a friend!
938 Nemukins March 14, 2013 at 6:27 pm: Awesome news, Jenny! And what awesome fans!
939 Beth Moe March 14, 2013 at 6:27 pm: I don’t even care if you give me a book, I’m going to buy it (again) anyway. I just wanted to tell you I saw you and your book mentioned in a little blurb in the March issue of Real Simple magazine. It said you were, ” A Funny Person to Follow” (twitter)
940 Lily March 14, 2013 at 6:27 pm: Buying it regardless, but I always like winning.
941 pgnbri March 14, 2013 at 6:28 pm: I would really love a copy of the paperback!! Pretty please????
942 Annie March 14, 2013 at 6:28 pm: Well done, madam!
943 Cathy March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: ‘Damaged yet okay’
Cathy recently posted..365 Poems: Google Reader edition
944 Sharon "the awesome" Henson March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: Pick me, pick me, pick me! I love cats too!
945 Maura March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: Would love to have a copy of the paperback! I promise to love it and cherish it as much as I do the hardback! I have a Bloggess bookmark ready and waiting for it!
946 Patti March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: Use as a coaster? Never! However, my signed Nathan Fillion pic makes an excellent trivet…
947 Heidi March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: I absolutely LOVE your book and would love to have a paperback copy. It is great to read when I am having a bad day.
948 Jenny March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: Look at that sea of your books! What a beautiful sight!
949 Benet March 14, 2013 at 6:29 pm: The totally awesome girl who is among the “three beautiful and unrelated Lawson girls” and who brought one of the world’s coolest photos for a photo with you? She’s a dear friend of mine. If I had an autographed copy of your book, I could sort of pretend her awesomeness rubbed off on me! Or even if it didn’t, at least I have a Bloggess autograph! Loved the book. My Dad still keeps asking me if you stole parts of it from my life. I’m just grateful that the dead-squirrel-puppet is not one of the things we have in common. I think I’d still be in a locked ward somewhere.
950 Cheryl R. March 14, 2013 at 6:30 pm: I would love another copy, especially a signed one.

I am a doctoral student and I read ALOT so it is great to have some fun reading each day. Thanks!
951 Joanne MacGregor March 14, 2013 at 6:30 pm: Ooh me! I only have the nook version!
952 radioactivegan March 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm: So, I bought your book when the paperback came out and took it on a plane trip to a working group meeting this week. I had three flights and two layovers, so I figured I would have plenty of time. I laughed out loud the whole time I read the book (despite my best efforts to appear composed). Although several people said something to me about it during the trip, I figured “What do I care? I won’t see these people again.” Right? Wrong. The guy sitting next to me on my last flight was at the same meeting. He gave me a pretty wide berth.
953 Judy March 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm: I’m dying to read the extra chapter, could use some good laughs in my life about now. Thank you for making me smile so often.
954 Sharon Pierce March 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm: Pick me! Pick me! (Hands frantically waving ) must. . .have. . .autographed. . Copy of awesomeness!!!!
955 Allison March 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm: You are awesome! If you were touring anywhere near me I’d fight the crowds to see you!
956 Jodi March 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm: You never fail to amaze me by making me either contemplate something profound or by making me laugh until I almost pee myself. I need to read your book. Now. Please.
957 Barb O March 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm: Congratulations! Now where’s my book?
958 AmberStar March 14, 2013 at 6:32 pm: Thank you for stepping outside your comfort zone and coming to see all of us. You’re one of my heroes <3
959 Kim Ramsey March 14, 2013 at 6:33 pm: Right on girl! Loved the booked…would love an autographed copy as much as I would love a taxidermied alligator dressed in a powder blue tuxedo
960 Megan McDonald March 14, 2013 at 6:33 pm: Please please pick me! Do you realize how far I just scrolled down just to comment on this!? And I would totally not use it as a lame coaster. I would show it off to all my friends so they can be crazy jelly.
961 Father Muskrat March 14, 2013 at 6:34 pm: a new chapter! woot!
Father Muskrat recently posted..never meanin’ no harm
962 Donna March 14, 2013 at 6:34 pm: Want want want! Love your blog and everything you do. In that weird, crazy way that makes everyone in the room uncomfortable. It’s my *specialty*.
963 Tayet March 14, 2013 at 6:35 pm: I’ve just read the original book, I’d love to read the new chapter of the new version.
Tayet recently posted..Gold is Getting Closer!
964 Utah L March 14, 2013 at 6:35 pm: Hey, I want to read that Bonus Chapter I’ll trade in my hardback for it.
965 Michelle (@michelliebel) March 14, 2013 at 6:36 pm: Not enough EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEs in my SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
966 Heather Smith March 14, 2013 at 6:36 pm: Ooh, me!! Pick me! Pick me! ::jumps up and down waving her hands::
967 Erika March 14, 2013 at 6:36 pm: i just ordered my copy! i read a chapter in the denver airport on tuesday… i was laughing so hard that i had tears streaming down my face and just nearly peed my pants. you rock, jenny! (autographed copy or not, you rock )
968 Jamie March 14, 2013 at 6:36 pm: Please and thank you those are the magic words if you want nice things to happen (winning a copy would be so nice) they are the words that should be heard. Oh my god why am I reciting Barney lyrics (which sound kind of/vaguely creepy when you type them out). I really loved your book and would be honored to have a signed copy.
969 Carole March 14, 2013 at 6:36 pm: <3 you, Jenny. You deserve every bit of your success. See you Tuesday!
970 Hwally March 14, 2013 at 6:38 pm: Wow! I’m impressed! Not surprised though Now the question is, what will it take to get to #1?
971 David Betz March 14, 2013 at 6:38 pm: I’m reading a library copy right now, but I’d love to have one of my own. Bonus chapter is bonus.
972 Jackie March 14, 2013 at 6:38 pm: I can’t wait to read it!
973 Heather Greywolf March 14, 2013 at 6:38 pm: Jenny, you astound me every day. Whether it is with your rapier-sharp wit or your unapologetic views on life. I bow to you, mademoiselle. Well done.
974 KathrynR March 14, 2013 at 6:40 pm: Congratulations! I’ll glady receive a signed copy thankyouverymuch! xo
KathrynR recently posted..Starbucks Old Fashioned Coffee Cake
975 Kelly@Sublurban Mama March 14, 2013 at 6:41 pm: I neeeeeeeeed this book. I mean that in the most First World Way possible.
Kelly@Sublurban Mama recently posted..Batting A Thousand
976 Katy March 14, 2013 at 6:41 pm: Pick Me!! Please?

Thanks for being you!
977 nancie March 14, 2013 at 6:41 pm: pick me
978 Rick Turner March 14, 2013 at 6:41 pm: Wish you were coming back to San Antonio for a reading. Love to see you again. Of course I guess I could just run into you at the mall or something, but it’d be weird asking you to start reading your book in the food court, wouldn’t it?
979 Alison F. March 14, 2013 at 6:42 pm: I would love another copy of your book. I won’t lend the one I have, (except to my daughter, and even from her, I took collateral), because I instead send people to your website and give them the link to buy it. You see, I’ve tried to explain you, many times . . . and I just can’t. It’s not “you had to be there,” it’s “you have to read it all – the blog and the books.” When I first found you, I read the whole blog in one shameful Saturday binge of snicker and “(insert link) YOU HAVE TO READ THIS” emails to my daughter. The book, I rationed, and read in two days. I would love another copy and it would have a place of pride on my shelf – then I would tear up the other one into chapters, and lend them out to still force people to buy the whole book for more. Is that wrong? Or just wrong in a good way? (Incidentally, I second all the Canadians encouraging you to come here. I promise we have our own brand of wonderful weirdness).
980 Kira March 14, 2013 at 6:42 pm: I would love a signed copy of your book!!
Kira recently posted..First Running Wound
981 Malin March 14, 2013 at 6:42 pm: Please pick me! If you’re giving away to people outside the US, that is. Which I hope you do. Because I love your book. It was amazing. I only have it in e-book, though, and would love to have it in an actual dead tree copy as well, especially because of the new chapter.
Malin recently posted..#CBR5 Book 27. "Sonen" (The Son) by Jon Fosse
982 Kelli March 14, 2013 at 6:42 pm: Congrats again on your success! I hope to make it to one of your tour spots someday.
983 Tenntrace March 14, 2013 at 6:43 pm: Me! Me! And congrats on the successful book tour.
984 Amanda March 14, 2013 at 6:43 pm: I’ve decided rather than a spirit animal, I would like a wordy talisman. See I tried an animal, the incomparable @plathitude helped me acquire a Georgian taxidermied squirrel for my daughter for Christmas. Crossing so many state lines and losing his nut were harrowing and now, poor confused guy (girl, really) has a piece of rotten wood epoxied in his maw. I just, I just don’t really want a spirit animal, but your book, I want to have it to clutch to my chest and thrust at people to ward off their crazy or their normal which brings out my crazy. So I’d love one of the five books, but I’d take something else, half toying with the idea of taking one of Squirrelty’s (the she/he southern squirrel) nails and wearing it around my neck.

Not sure I can chance it though, will go buy the soft back, which I’ve been waiting for because I feel bad breaking the spines of hardbacks.
Amanda recently posted..Home at Work
985 Veronica March 14, 2013 at 6:43 pm: I can’t wait to see you next weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkk!!!! (In KCMO!)
986 Jess March 14, 2013 at 6:43 pm: Pick me! Pick me!! I’ve been wanting to read your book but haven’t gotten a chance to buy it yet! Help a girl out! lol
987 Diana W. March 14, 2013 at 6:44 pm: Congratulations, Jenny! You deserve it!
988 Anne Zavalick March 14, 2013 at 6:44 pm: I’d love a signed copy for myself. My sister and I saw you in north Jersey and you were made of awesome and funny! But the copy of got autographed I gave to my niece, so I want my very own paperback. To go with my hardcover, which did NOT have the bonus chapter.
989 Rebekah March 14, 2013 at 6:45 pm: I wouldn’t mind winning a copy. My friend Kylie and I are super huge fans!
Rebekah recently posted..Pulchritudinality
990 Rachael March 14, 2013 at 6:45 pm: I want to win!!!
991 Jennie March 14, 2013 at 6:45 pm: Congrats on hitting the NYT’s list again; you deserve it!
992 Barbara March 14, 2013 at 6:45 pm: Congratulations! That picture is fantastic.
Barbara recently posted..One Hopping Wild Month
993 Lisa March 14, 2013 at 6:45 pm: so-o-o-o-o need another copy of the book because I haven’t gotten tossed off the train yet for laughing so hard I hyperventilated.
994 Jen March 14, 2013 at 6:46 pm: I once gave up on housework. Just totally went on strike and spent a week flopping on the couch after work. The day prior to my Strike O’ Apathy I made a pot roast in the crockpot. Nobody put the pot roast away. All. Week. Mr. Jen finally hid it in the fridge. When I couldn’t stand it anymore, I burst forth in a cleaning frenzy. Opened the fridge. Lifted the crock-pot lid. Gagged. Last time I smelled something like that was the last Easter the bunny hid real eggs in the house (he hid them so well the Jenlings missed two. Not one. Two. We thought the hamster died. He was really old and had escaped and was living in the floor vents.) I didn’t know what to do with the rotten roast. Garbage day was still like, four days out. I couldn’t put it in the trash, I’d stink up the outdoors. I couldn’t leave it in the fridge because of like, ebola and stuff.

So I flushed it down the toilet.

That didn’t work out so well.

That eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee sound? Last time I made that sound a decomposing hunk of beef was chasing me out of the bathroom on a sea of toilet water.

I would love to make that noise again, but with less emotional trauma and Clorox.

Pick me, and I will. (Make that noise, not flush a pot roast.)
995 Fang Ewe March 14, 2013 at 6:46 pm: Me! I have a friend who cuts herself and I know your boom will definitely help her and if I get it I’m gonna give it to her (but I’l. Read it first she won’t mind and won’t know hehe) but please for me and her thank you!
996 Beverly March 14, 2013 at 6:46 pm: I wish you would come back to Atlanta. best time I had in a long time was at your signing!!!
997 Lesley March 14, 2013 at 6:47 pm: I literally cried from laughing so hard. My DH thought I gone and lost my mind… up in here.. up in here… sorry about the musical reference, but it’s how I roll. lol.. anyways, thanks for being born and using the written word to fulfill my appetite of a good laugh-cry.. cuz that’s a thing.. the laugh-cry..

Pick me!
998 HogsAteMySister March 14, 2013 at 6:47 pm: It’s my birthday!

Really.

I’ll show you my drivers license if need be.

So I win a book, right?

RIGHT?

WOOT!
HogsAteMySister recently posted..My Birthday List
999 Brandi N March 14, 2013 at 6:47 pm: Coming out of lurk-dom to WIN! *I hope*
Brandi N.
1000 Joanna March 14, 2013 at 6:47 pm: YAY! Congratulations! You deserve to be #1 on the list
1001 Alecia March 14, 2013 at 6:48 pm: Yes, please come back to Atlanta!
1002 Alyssa March 14, 2013 at 6:50 pm: I really want a copy! Love your writing
1003 Tracy J. March 14, 2013 at 6:50 pm: You are the only reason for Texas being on my list of states to drive through. You and the giant ball of twine. Well, if the giant twine-ball got loose and rolled down out of Kansas, through Oklahoma, and came to rest in, like, Lampasas or some such place.
1004 Loren March 14, 2013 at 6:50 pm: Need! Want! Love you! Please! (and thank you.)
1005 Kelley March 14, 2013 at 6:51 pm: I really wish you were headed to the Atlanta area.
1006 Lauren March 14, 2013 at 6:52 pm: I can’t read enough! Blog, book, tweets!!! More more more
1007 Karen Miller March 14, 2013 at 6:52 pm: Congrats!!! Well deserved!!!
1008 Brittany sandoval March 14, 2013 at 6:53 pm: I already own the hard cover but i would love a soft cover with bonus stuff for basic training!!!!!!
1009 Emily March 14, 2013 at 6:54 pm: At some point will you post the extra chapter? I really want to read it but I’m a broke university student and already have the hardcover copy!
1010 Liz March 14, 2013 at 6:54 pm: so awesome, congrats!
Liz recently posted..Our Story- Part 3
1011 Stacy March 14, 2013 at 6:55 pm: Oh pick me!
1012 Jason March 14, 2013 at 6:55 pm: Oh, boy, there’s no way in hell that I’ve got a chance of winning one of the five copies … *prays the the Random Number Generator Gods … and Deep Thought*
1013 Claude March 14, 2013 at 6:56 pm: You are so awesome! That is why you are succeeding. That and because seriouly, who could NOT love you? You are the dysfunctional best friend we all wish we had! Congrats on your success!
1014 Ashley March 14, 2013 at 6:56 pm: If you give me one, I absolutely promise to give it to a friend after I’ve read the bonus chapter! Gotta spread the wealth, you know!
1015 Issa March 14, 2013 at 6:56 pm: I just got my paperback, but I would love an autographed copy (to go with my autographed hardcover)
Issa recently posted..Day 198 – Stop Stealing My Time
1016 Karen March 14, 2013 at 6:57 pm: Oh, to smell of cupcakes and magnificence…
1017 Laura March 14, 2013 at 6:57 pm: Congratulations!
1018 Wendi Klein March 14, 2013 at 7:00 pm: You are such an amazing inspiration Jenny. In my mind we are best friends. thank you for making me laugh, and just being you.
1019 Rhonda Cates March 14, 2013 at 7:01 pm: Congrats! One of the funniest books I’ve read this year.
1020 kettletop March 14, 2013 at 7:01 pm: squeeeeeeeeee!
1021 Merry S. March 14, 2013 at 7:01 pm: Sometimes, when I feel truly lost and alone, I will read your blog until I feel like I can smile again. Thank you, for that, and all the others who you make smile. You touch more people than you can imagine.
1022 Y March 14, 2013 at 7:01 pm: Come to Australia and I’ll give you a slice of my son’s R2D2 cake I’m making for his party tomorrow!
Y recently posted..Obama is a reader
1023 Kim March 14, 2013 at 7:02 pm: I would love to win one, but with almost 900 comments appearing before mine, and who knows how many after, I am sure I wouldn’t win a copy. I just wanted to write a congratulatory message to you! How awesome! ?????????
1024 Jen R March 14, 2013 at 7:02 pm: I would love a copy of the book, I had it on my Christmas wish list, but I never got it.
1025 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 7:02 pm: Pick me please!!
1026 Katie March 14, 2013 at 7:02 pm: Me me me!!!!
1027 Elizabeth M. March 14, 2013 at 7:02 pm: I was there! I was standing off to your right behind the cards. Because I was running late and feeling panicky, but I was there! (In the bright yellow shirt)

Someone asked me why I have three copies of your book. I let her read a chapter (I’m not sure which one she picked), and she was going to buy a copy after work. YAY!

I’m proud of you, Jenny. <3
1028 Alison March 14, 2013 at 7:02 pm: Congratulations! I follow you on twitter and read your blog religiously. Haven’t got the book yet, though– maybe you can help with that? Think of you and this strange tribe whenever I come across a picture of a weird taxidermy animal….
1029 JessJess N March 14, 2013 at 7:03 pm: I wish so much I could come to one of your tour locations. But alas, just too far to travel right now . I would also LOVE a copy of your book :3
1030 Curiosity March 14, 2013 at 7:03 pm: (love that second sentence. )

Congratulations on your success, and thank you for being a filter that brings together awesome people.
Curiosity recently posted..I’m pretty sure only one of those would notice it’s pi day today
1031 Tracy J March 14, 2013 at 7:03 pm: You are the reason Texas is on my list of states to drive through. You and the giant ball of twine. But only if the giant ball of twine escaped from Kansas and rolled down the country squashing parts of Oklahoma and came to rest in, like, Lampasas or somewhere. Otherwise, it’s just you. Congrats on #5!
1032 Kim March 14, 2013 at 7:04 pm: Ok… that wasn’t supposed to be a bunch of ?s at the end… it shwed up as hearts for me. Don’t you hate it when things don’t work then way they are supposed to?
Kim recently posted..Intermission
1033 Kacie March 14, 2013 at 7:05 pm: I’m going to buy the book anyway but I’d LOVE to have a signed copy! You really inspire me
1034 Alicia York March 14, 2013 at 7:05 pm: I would slap a kitten to get one of those signed books! Ok, maybe I wouldn’t slap a kitten.. I might squeeze it a little. But not enough to make it cry.. or even make it’s eyes bug out.. very much.
1035 Jennifer Malik March 14, 2013 at 7:05 pm: Yay #5!
1036 London Calling March 14, 2013 at 7:06 pm: You’re inspirational! I would love a book. ^_^;;
1037 Jen March 14, 2013 at 7:08 pm: I pulled a Jenny and crapped out on going to you when you came to Seattle last August because I got scared. I still haven’t forgiven myself.
1038 Tanya March 14, 2013 at 7:09 pm: please? or as my little niece says, “peas”?
1039 teezaweezl March 14, 2013 at 7:10 pm: Thanks for an awesome evening in New Jersey on your tour.
If we win a signed book, could you make it, “To Aaron.”
Still the Best Gift EVER!!

Eve xo
1040 Tara March 14, 2013 at 7:10 pm: I hope I get picked! (If not, Congrats to whomever wins!!!)
1041 Beth March 14, 2013 at 7:11 pm: I just passed your book on to my mom. She loves it. I don’t think I’ll be getting it back.
1042 Andrea March 14, 2013 at 7:11 pm: I would love a signed copy! I’ve been meaning to pick up the book but just haven’t got around to it.
1043 jo March 14, 2013 at 7:13 pm: I love your tribe!
1044 Cynthia W March 14, 2013 at 7:13 pm: Oooh… Pick me! I want the bonus chapter!
1045 Jen March 14, 2013 at 7:13 pm: Love this book! Passed your website onto some friend who needed it the most!!!
1046 mothers little hleper March 14, 2013 at 7:15 pm: me me me pick me, so that I can spread the word and share your ‘special’ talent with people in Singapore.
mothers little hleper recently posted..nothing in life is certain
1047 Nikki March 14, 2013 at 7:16 pm: I want to read the new chapter!
1048 Ann March 14, 2013 at 7:17 pm: For real. You are welcome. Together is good.
1049 Bridget March 14, 2013 at 7:18 pm: I want the book
1050 Allison March 14, 2013 at 7:19 pm: Me, please. I need something positive after this week…
1051 Meagan F. March 14, 2013 at 7:19 pm: My husband bought me a kindle copy of your book for my birthday, and I laughed so hard I cried and woke up my three month old daughter. It helped me through the darkest part of my postpartum depression as I was adjusting to my meds and trying to be a sane mom. Since then, I’ve told everyone I know and everyone I’ve met that they need to at least read your blog if they don’t buy your book.
1052 jeanette March 14, 2013 at 7:20 pm: me-me-me! (please!)
jeanette recently posted..5K for Pi Day – 3.14
1053 Allison March 14, 2013 at 7:20 pm: awesome! can’t wait for the bonus chapter.
1054 Just Vegas March 14, 2013 at 7:20 pm: I need it!! I really do!
Just Vegas recently posted..Zen in a Call Center
1055 Rachael March 14, 2013 at 7:21 pm: Beautiful Bloggess, I just have to say how much I adore you and your book. I laughed so hard I cried so many times I lost count, and promptly purchased the paperback for my sister. Her husband’s terminally ill and she’s going through an incredibly rough time so I figured she needed a laugh. And who better to give her one? Thank you for helping the weirdos and the misfits and making us feel like we belong.
1056 King Mengi March 14, 2013 at 7:21 pm: You’re an inspiration, Jenny!
King Mengi recently posted..VAMPIRES INVADE EAST COAST
1057 Allison G. March 14, 2013 at 7:21 pm: Pick me! Pick me! Pretty please with a cherry on top? And an only slightly squeezed hamster?
1058 Donna March 14, 2013 at 7:22 pm: _Our_ bizarre tribe? We’re part of _your_ bizarre tribe!
(Probably said before, but the comments are tl;dr)

I have a Kindle book and a bookplate (which is _on my office wall_, not hidden in a book!) But I would love a real autographed paperback!

Yay for a stop in Danville! Maybe this time I’ll come early enough to be in the same room.
1059 Heidi T March 14, 2013 at 7:23 pm: I want a copy!!
1060 Brandy Camel March 14, 2013 at 7:23 pm: I have someone I would love to give this too – that, and I bought the audio book the first time around, so I don’t have a physical copy! I totally need one, even though the melodious sound of your voice talking about vaginas and taxidermy is one of the highlights of my commute.
1061 Jerri March 14, 2013 at 7:25 pm: Love you! Love the book! Wish you would come to wisconsin!Wisconsin
1062 Billie Jensen March 14, 2013 at 7:25 pm: Absolutely, not to pull rank or anything, but I am the new wife! (that and I don’t want to give up my copy to the family who wants to read it…)
1063 Jess March 14, 2013 at 7:26 pm: I seriously just LOVE this blog. Just… LOVE.
1064 Shari March 14, 2013 at 7:26 pm: I honestly just got goosebumps from the sheer awesomeness of all those lovely people holding up your book.
1065 Cheryl Dudley March 14, 2013 at 7:26 pm: Awesome for you!
1066 Tara March 14, 2013 at 7:27 pm: Happy pi day!
1067 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 7:27 pm: I’m so happy for all of your success!
1068 Julia Morton March 14, 2013 at 7:27 pm: Signed copy would be muchly appreciated. I have the e-book. And you can’t sign an e-book.
1069 Leslie March 14, 2013 at 7:29 pm: Congratulations! I hope to get my own copy soon…
1070 Judith Smith March 14, 2013 at 7:30 pm: I am honoured to be part of this community. (and honoured is spelled correctly, I am Canadian!) Congrats on your success.
1071 Sierra Trees-Turner March 14, 2013 at 7:30 pm: That photo is epic, “bizarre tribe, I love that! We love you in Canada, too!
1072 KatieS March 14, 2013 at 7:30 pm
1073 Kate March 14, 2013 at 7:31 pm: You make me laugh. Congratulations on the book success!
1074 Nelaril March 14, 2013 at 7:31 pm: Well, I’m hoping I have next Thursday off because that’s when you’re in my part of the world. I’m excited!
1075 Marie Pickard March 14, 2013 at 7:32 pm: Congrats!!!
1076 Janellionaire March 14, 2013 at 7:32 pm: Want. So very much want.
1077 Mary W. March 14, 2013 at 7:32 pm: I would love a copy, you are such an inspiration for people who suffer from anxiety!
1078 Faithe March 14, 2013 at 7:32 pm: Me me me me!!! And you can totally just give it to me on Tuesday when I meet you in Dayton! I cannot tell you how psyched I am to have you in my city! It’s gonna be a good day!! You will totally be my favorite person on Tuesday! AND I totally got my friend hooked on you when I asked for volunteers to come with me. So I TOTALLY deserve this book! Cuz I NEED the extra chapter!
1079 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 7:33 pm: whoohoo! I would have been in that pic, but I was way overheating from all the love and had to seek refuge one aisle over Thanks for being so patient with the picture taking and story-telling of your fans. I felt self conscious for like a second that I was so awkwardly leaning on the table with my big ol’ booty in the air for the 5 minutes it took for the sweet bookshop lady to stop activating Siri and take the pic, but decided that I was among loving, accepting people and it didn’t matter. Thanks for touring again and sharing your stories!
1080 Ellie74 March 14, 2013 at 7:33 pm: EEEEEEEEE!!!!! signed book!! signed book!!!! I only have an electronic version, because I don’t have a decent bookshop in my small town here in Australia.
But I will pay shipping & handling fees if that helps!!!!
Ooohhh ooohhhh puhleeze pick me!!!!!
1081 Faithe March 14, 2013 at 7:33 pm: Crap, you probably need my email. Oh wait! You’re just gonna give it to me on Tuesday!
1082 Mandy March 14, 2013 at 7:34 pm: Pick me! I haven’t read it yet. Blagh! Congratulations on the success of the book. I am so excited for you!
1083 Ali C March 14, 2013 at 7:34 pm: I’ve been on the waiting list for your book at the library FOREVER. Even though they have 37 copies. I’m almost at the top of the list but I’d love to have my own copy.
1084 Cheryl March 14, 2013 at 7:34 pm: Pick Me! I’m a newbie and wish I had found you years ago!! I need a Beyonce in my life, the large one, the small one just won’t cut it in this house.
1085 Angelina I March 14, 2013 at 7:36 pm: PICK ME PICK ME PUHLEEZE!!!!!!!!!!! I already have a copy but it hasn’t been besmirched by your pen!
1086 Miss Jay March 14, 2013 at 7:36 pm: I don’t have anything clever or witty to say, I’m a lurker just peeking out long enough to qualify for the book. Thanks.
1087 Cat March 14, 2013 at 7:38 pm: I’ve made a totally new great friend thanks to your tribe, Jenny. I can’t thank you enough for being the awesome person you are.
1088 Amanda March 14, 2013 at 7:39 pm: wow, so many more comments than usual when you have a giveaway!
Amanda recently posted..Emotional exhaustion
1089 Ginny D March 14, 2013 at 7:39 pm: Holy cow! I free book from you?! Please, oh please, oh please?!! I have so many people I could share with. My friends and I have been introducing new friends to your amazingness. Pick me!! I ain’t too proud to beg!
1090 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 7:39 pm: You rock like a Fraggle!!! The book is pure awesomeness!
1091 Anonymous March 14, 2013 at 7:39 pm: Got the hardback, so unless I win; I’ll read the bonus chapter sitting in Barnes and Noble. Also, I made my book club read it, I mean my book club was chomping at the bit to read it and we all loved it. My husband has bipolar 2 (1 wasn’t good enough for him) so am looking forward to the second book immensely. Thanks for sharing your life.
1092 Gretchen March 14, 2013 at 7:39 pm: would love a copy!! Love your blog!
1093 caitlinstern March 14, 2013 at 7:41 pm: Oh, I, like a thousand other people, would like a free book! Not great odds, but worth trying.
caitlinstern recently posted..P & P Challenge: Prom
1094 Elizabeth March 14, 2013 at 7:41 pm: I wish I could come see you! But the closest you’ll be to me is Kentucky, and I have an extremely full day on the 18th.
1095 Ashley Wheeler March 14, 2013 at 7:41 pm: It’s because you’re awesome! I can’t wait to see you!

Also, I NEEEEEED YOUR NEW BOOK! I have a hard back copy already but I need this one to read the bonus chapter!
1096 Elizabeth A. March 14, 2013 at 7:41 pm: I would love to win this book! It really is the funniest and most heartwarming thing I had read in a long time! I wish you were coming closer to Birmingham, AL. Good luck on things!
1097 Jeanette March 14, 2013 at 7:41 pm: Dear Jenny,
Thank you for being such an inspiration to my daughter Elizabeth. (She’s the red dress girl in Chicago). When she showed me her autographed paperback and talked about showing you the picture of the two of you she was grinning from ear to ear. That doesn’t happen often enough.
She has struggles and you are a source of strength for her.

Thanks
XOXO
Jeanette
1098 Megan March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: OMGoodness I want one!!! You make my heart happy!
1099 TravelSkite March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: I would have come to a signing, I really would, if you had only included New Zealand on your itinerary. What’s with that? Something we said? Pft!
TravelSkite recently posted..Not fair, Fairfax.
1100 Kim Miller March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: I’m so happy for you! I bought the hardcover when it came out and got a beautiful signed bookplate from you. And then I sent it to a friend before I had a chance to read it. She was going through a really rough time and I thought you would be a perfect cure for her. I was right. So now I’m going to get the paperback! Any chance of bribing another bookplate from you?

Keep on rollin, Bloggess… we love you!
1101 catena March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: Pick me, because I catch mice under a pot and release them outside. My three badass cats are no help.
1102 Stefanie March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: Love! You make my day each time I read your blog. I would love the extra chapter!
1103 Nick March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: My wife and I both loved your first book, we told all our friends about it. Can’t wait to read the new one.
1104 KateB March 14, 2013 at 7:42 pm: I am still ticked that they scheduled you in St. Louis on the same night as the Muse concert. Would love an autographed book. Thanks for sharing!
1105 RJ March 14, 2013 at 7:43 pm: Ahh! Pick me! Pick me!
1106 Merry Smith March 14, 2013 at 7:43 pm: Hi Jenny, love the blog. I’m sitting in my garden in New Zealand ( you know, those two little islands just to the right of Australia) and I’m laughing like a drain. Maybe one day you’ll get down here and do a book tour. Look forward to it, I’m sure you’ll have fun here. Hugs from a fellow Whovian.
1107 Lindsay March 14, 2013 at 7:44 pm: Yay! That’s great! Congrats!
1108 Kristin March 14, 2013 at 7:44 pm: Yay!!! My husband was there and is actually in the picture above. We have the audio version, hardcover and paperback now (signed for me of course). Congrats!!!
1109 Sue Zieman March 14, 2013 at 7:45 pm: I bought the hard cover, so unless I win; I will be reading the bonus chapter at Barnes and Noble. I did make my book club read it this summer, they loved it.
1110 Shannon Fielding March 14, 2013 at 7:45 pm: Thank you for bringing us together
Shannon Fielding recently posted..Thanks for another great SxSW — see you next year!
1111 Jordin March 14, 2013 at 7:45 pm: Oh please!!! I still want to see if my newborn babe and I made it in the new chapter. Or come back to Toronto, where I will again drive for a total of six hours just to see you again.
1112 Laura March 14, 2013 at 7:46 pm: Your site is one of my daily stops around the internets. It always brings me happy, nerdy smiles and it gives me faith that you’ve found such great success. Thank you
1113 Jonathan March 14, 2013 at 7:47 pm: I just discovered you recently, thanks to a good friend of mine. I hope you pick me, but if not, I’ll be sticking around anyway. )
1114 Molly Thompson March 14, 2013 at 7:49 pm: Keep on keepin’ on
Molly Thompson recently posted..Moonstruck Molly: Volume 2
1115 Katie March 14, 2013 at 7:50 pm: You’ll be in KC soon! Exciting!
1116 Carin March 14, 2013 at 7:50 pm: Well if I didn’t feel guilty before, that picture does it. I’m in there toward the back NOT holding up my newly purchased paperback version because I had the nerve to come see you without purchasing one from Anderson’s. In my defense, I have the hard cover copy, but apparently it is a major faux pas to attend a book signing without purchasing said book from the hosting bookstore. You should have seen the look we got when they asked us if we had our books to sign and we said that we just came to see you. The other store lady had to jump in and say tell her it was ok for us to be there. We sat down and kept thinking they were going to politely ask us to give up our seats for the “real” fans. Now I know how lepers must feel. Anyway, you were great and it was worth the evil eye. Would love a copy of the “COOL” version but not sure if I deserve it. Oh the shame…

Would feel honored to received
1117 Shannon Howery March 14, 2013 at 7:50 pm: I just want a signed anything from you. May I have a signed anything from you?
1118 Katrina March 14, 2013 at 7:51 pm: Congratulations! Your honesty and humor and openness bring us all together.
1119 emelle March 14, 2013 at 7:51 pm: That is awesome. All of it. The picture of a thousand pictures (well, it looks like a thousand book covers to ME) must be worth a thousand-thousand words (that’s a million, if I’ve done my math correctly). So a million words (or a thousand-thousand, if that’s your preference) should cover WHY I SHOULD WIN a signed paperback, right? If not, maybe knowing that winning would make me furiously happy does the trick? I dunno, I’m just spitballin’ here.

Jenny, I love you more than a picture of a thousand pictures. Can you stop in at Winston-Salem, NC? I’m sure there’s a bookstore somewhere around here.
1120 Ryan March 14, 2013 at 7:51 pm: I wish you were coming to Wilkes Barre Pa!!
1121 MeredithVenice March 14, 2013 at 7:53 pm: I love to entertain and mortify my children and husband by doing dramatic readings from your blog after I have taken my nightly dose of Xanax. Of course, the drama is punctuated by tears, snorts, and side clutching as I laugh myself into hysteria. This is followed by my husband escorting me to bed like an invalid. (Once upon a time he worked as an orderly at a mental hospital. Little did he suspect that one day that training would come in handy.) Please pick me for a signed copy of your book, so I can continue to torment my family with my perverse pleasure of reading about your tomfoolery and shenanigans? Pretty please??
1122 Paw March 14, 2013 at 7:54 pm: Aw, I would love a signed copy!
I would name it “Wanda”.
1123 Minnesota Red March 14, 2013 at 7:54 pm: I hear they might not be able to put Chavez’s corpse on permanent display down in Venezuela. I think your dad could fix that, right?

So happy for you!
1124 Andrea K. March 14, 2013 at 7:55 pm: Pretty Please!
1125 Shelly March 14, 2013 at 7:55 pm: Jenny, I have been reading your blog for about a year now. I LOVE your writing and stories. I decided this was a good reason to stop being a “creeper”! I want your book!
1126 Betty March 14, 2013 at 7:55 pm: Even if you were coming to Boston I still couldn’t have you sign my e-book, so paper would be better!
Betty recently posted..What is Bandcamp
1127 Rancia Rodgers March 14, 2013 at 7:55 pm: I really want your book!!
1128 Laura March 14, 2013 at 7:55 pm: When are you coming to Ohio???
Laura recently posted..Emergency
1129 Heather March 14, 2013 at 7:59 pm: I want a book!! Pick me….
1130 Laurel March 14, 2013 at 7:59 pm: Ummm pick me please, my exhusband got custody of your book in the divorce, so I had to buy it on my nook. In fact- I even pre-ordered that sucker. I need a hard copy with a hand written cartoon please. (True story)
1131 Beth S March 14, 2013 at 8:00 pm: Would love an autographed book!
1132 Billie March 14, 2013 at 8:01 pm: Loved the book and would love to have one to give to a friend–after I read it, of course!
1133 KatPerez March 14, 2013 at 8:01 pm: I still wish I had attended your first book tour!! I’m determined do see you when you tour in Miami again.
I lent my best friend your book and she loved it. I wouldn’t mind having an extra copy to send to her Navy base so she can have something amusing to read while stuck in her bunk!
KatPerez recently posted..Cake bake
1134 PotterWhovian March 14, 2013 at 8:03 pm: *throws name in hat* Woohoo! Will you be in the Seattle area at all? Do you have Hamlet with you this time? He would make an awesome travel buddy, I am sure. xD
1135 Michelle March 14, 2013 at 8:03 pm: (jumping up and down and frantically waving my arms in a strange combination of excitement, nervous energy…because oh crap people might notice me…and a gleeful rush of a toddler-on-Christmas-Eve adrenaline) “Ooooooh, pick me, pick me, pick me!!!!

Hee hee…I was typing to fast I accidentally typed puck me. All lesbain based, Freudian slips aside, now I’m worried random Canadians, or possibly Russians….basically people from any country where hockey is popular….are going to throw pucks at me.

Anyway, pick me. Or puck me. Whatever.
1136 Heather March 14, 2013 at 8:04 pm: Please pick me! I haven’t read it yet and reeeeaaallly want to.
1137 Jen5253 Range March 14, 2013 at 8:04 pm: Congratulations!! I’m so excited for you!

I am embarrassed to admit that I have not yet bought or read your book, so it sure would be fun to win a copy!
1138 Heather March 14, 2013 at 8:05 pm: count me in too
1139 Jen March 14, 2013 at 8:05 pm: Woot! Would love a copy – but would love to see you as well!
Jen recently posted..It’s not a distraction. It’s a productivity technique.
1140 Judy, Judy, Judy March 14, 2013 at 8:05 pm: Have the hardback. Haven’t been able to get the hard back yet. Can’t wait to read the extra chapter.
Judy, Judy, Judy recently posted..current events
1141 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 8:06 pm: Pick me please… need to read that bonus chapter and annoy my kids with more crazy laughter
1142 Katy March 14, 2013 at 8:06 pm: Congratulations on the book making it to #5! That’s awesome!
(And yeah, I’d love to win a signed copy, heh.)
Katy recently posted..January 26, 2013 – Red Rocks, Morrison Cemetery, Mt. Vernon Cemetery
1143 E.D. March 14, 2013 at 8:06 pm: Can I have one please?
1144 Allison March 14, 2013 at 8:08 pm: Already own the hardcover book, but I would LOVE to have an autographed copy of the new one. Want to come see you, will you PLEASE come to Michigan? Sitting here crying to my 12 year old daughter (who also read your book) because I can’t get out of work to drive to Dayton to meet you. You are so awesome, read your blog daily, laughed so hard when I read the book the book the first time on an airplane I actually had to put it away because people were starting to look at me like I was crazy!! Please pick me!!
1145 Traci March 14, 2013 at 8:08 pm: I love you and I wish I could come see you on your tour!! Congrats on the number 5 spot!!
1146 marty deloreto March 14, 2013 at 8:09 pm: Thank you for being my guaranteed laugh everytime I read your blog or book for the eleventy-billlionth time. I will read the new chapter eleventy-billionth and one times. Promise.
1147 Laurie March 14, 2013 at 8:10 pm: I would collate papers that say “Knock Knock, Motherfucker” while dressed in a Unicorn costume wrapped in twine and covered in glitter, hiding in a bathroom for a signed copy of your paperback book!! PLEASE pick me!! Love you! ?
1148 Christine March 14, 2013 at 8:11 pm: Pick me! Pick me! *jumps up and down…arms flailing*
1149 Laurie March 14, 2013 at 8:11 pm: I’ve bought three copies of your book so far. It would be fun to win one with an extra chapter. I’d keep it for me!
1150 Kristen March 14, 2013 at 8:12 pm: Jenny, you make me laugh so hard I cry. And then you make me want to do it all over again. I seriously want to photocopy a chapter or two and carry it in my purse for emergency angst situations. A paperback is much easier to carry in my purse and much less likely to be wadded up and tossed in the trash with miscellaneous sticker backs, used tissues and receipts. Pick me?
1151 Kim March 14, 2013 at 8:12 pm: Oh, goodness. I want the book!! I’ve read it, but I don’t think I did it right. I’d like a chance to try again!!
1152 Jenny Matthews March 14, 2013 at 8:13 pm: Thank you for writing this book!!! And FYI – I am giving one to EVERYONE I know for Christmas!!!
1153 Joanna March 14, 2013 at 8:13 pm: Pick meeee!
1154 Ashleigh March 14, 2013 at 8:13 pm: Honey, you’re the LEADER of our tribe!
Ashleigh recently posted..Breaking?
1155 Gina March 14, 2013 at 8:13 pm: Seeing as you don’t seem to have any plans to visit rural West Tennessee any time soon, I would absolutely adore a chance to get an autographed copy of your book. Oh- and on another note, I totally cured an agoraphobic cat I rescued from the pound by asking myself every day, “What Would Jenny Do?” Two months later and the cat is just mildly neurotic. Thank you.
1156 Emma March 14, 2013 at 8:15 pm: me, me! Safe travels!!
1157 magpiesixty March 14, 2013 at 8:16 pm: Pick me, pick me. I bought your book last summer and loaned it to a friend. So I totally need another copy that I would NEVER use as a coaster.
1158 Mary March 14, 2013 at 8:16 pm: I say come back to Atlanta again, it’ll be fun!
1159 Carol March 14, 2013 at 8:16 pm: Sell it on ebay? Are you crazy? I do like the idea of giving it to a new friend to test them out. It’s a great way to find out how compatible you are with someone. However, I do have a friend with a birthday coming and I know she’d love it, so it would probably got o her since I already have both the hardcover and the paperback. What? They’re different. Of course I needed both.

And before I forget: CONGRATULATIONS!! You so deserve it! It is a great book. It made me laugh like I hadn’t in a really long time. Thank you!!
Carol recently posted..Cat Café
1160 Wanda March 14, 2013 at 8:16 pm: Since you’re not touring anywhere near me, an autographed copy would help make up for the disappointment.
1161 jonathan zero March 14, 2013 at 8:16 pm: i missed you when you came through Charlotte, NC and i am still kicking myself for not going.
1162 Tammy C March 14, 2013 at 8:17 pm: Comment comment comment!!! Eeeeee!
1163 Amber March 14, 2013 at 8:17 pm: I would love to win! It has been one hell of a week and I could use something good! Loved your book, BTW!!!
1164 Angela March 14, 2013 at 8:18 pm: Sadly, without photo smelling technology I cannot enjoy the cupcakes or magnificence, but looking at the smiles of the folks in the picture, I have to say — I get it.

I can’t join the book tour crowd- but I am with you in spirit!
1165 Sean March 14, 2013 at 8:23 pm: At the NJ signing, I got books for my wife and her best friend, and never thought to myself “Dammit, I’m gonna want one too!!”
1166 Susan March 14, 2013 at 8:24 pm: I have used “Lamb” by Michael Moore to test new friends, I can’t see how this would be any different, bring it on!
1167 Rachel March 14, 2013 at 8:24 pm: Pick me! Pick me!
1168 Gracie Lace March 14, 2013 at 8:25 pm: Are you stopping in Kansas at all on this tour? If not, you should. We have the world’s largest ball of Twine.

http://www.kansastravel.org/balloftwine.htm

that should make Kansas awesome enough to come visit, right??
1169 Opiwan March 14, 2013 at 8:26 pm: Completely totally need a signed copy so definitely pick meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
1170 Shelley March 14, 2013 at 8:26 pm: Would love to win this! Now if I can just convince you to come to my town for a book signing…
1171 Jackson Colville March 14, 2013 at 8:26 pm: Ooooh, me please! I have just the friend!!!
1172 thel March 14, 2013 at 8:28 pm: I have an overdue library copy of your book which I can’t renew because somebody has a hold on it, and I haven’t finished it yet because I was working on my first ever quilt for my son’s birthday which was yesterday and I’m almost finished with the quilt but not with the book.
ps. scorpions are scary and I’m never moving to Texas
thel recently posted..Pizza bites and Kraft mac & cheese
1173 ppg March 14, 2013 at 8:30 pm: Jenny! Jenny! Jenny!

I should totally be one of the recipients of your book because:

A. I haven’t been able to buy it yet
B. After 4.5 half super not awesome years of being homeless off and on, I am no more. I finally moved out of my car and into my very own apartment after the most grossest divorce/bankruptcy/foreclosure (Haven’t updated my blog yet because I was sick for the first month and now I am just being lazy).

and

C. Because I love you and I am still here largely because of you and all the crazy/wonderful things you bring to my life (I repeat “don’t leave” over and over when the moment calls for it and so far it is working).
1174 amy March 14, 2013 at 8:31 pm: I want to win!!!!
1175 Megan M. March 14, 2013 at 8:32 pm: Ooh pick me! I have the hardcover but won’t be able to make it to any of your tour stops this time around to get it signed in person.
1176 Judith Mendoza March 14, 2013 at 8:33 pm: I totally went and got a copy for all of my best friends so I’d have someone to talk about your book with. Now I have some of them coming with me to San Francisco next month to get the paperback and meet our favorite author-YOU. Also when I first met my new roommate this school year the first book I recommended was yours and we went from being strangers to best friends in less than a week!! Thank you and I cannot wait to get the paperback version for the extra chapter of awesomeness!!
1177 Bethany March 14, 2013 at 8:36 pm: Like bad AM radio:
Long time reader, first time poster.

Pick me!
Bethany recently posted..With a love like that, you know you should be GLAD!
1178 Robin March 14, 2013 at 8:37 pm: I would be greatly honored to receive an autographed copy from you if I am chosen. Thanks for the opportunity!
1179 lisa March 14, 2013 at 8:37 pm: please oh please pick me! i want the extra bonus chaptery goodness!
1180 CM March 14, 2013 at 8:37 pm: Ooh! Ooh! I SO want to win. Especially since my signed plaque envelope was empty. Wah. That is SO the story of my life, though.

You should extend your tour into Texas. I seriously would love to have you sign my book in person!!!
1181 Stumpsandbeans March 14, 2013 at 8:37 pm: Commenting twice to increase my odds FTW
Stumpsandbeans recently posted..“…Intimacy! That’s the you in me…”
1182 Anne Seeley March 14, 2013 at 8:38 pm: Jennie. I love your blog, follow you on twitter. Love that you are friends with Anne and Wil Wheaton! I am not holding my breath for a Canadian tour; as I know you are a Texan and you probably think Kentucky is a northern state. You have a wicked sense of humour (yes spelled correctly – Canadian) that I enjoy. Thanks for all the smiles, tears and joy. Hugs girl
1183 Lori March 14, 2013 at 8:39 pm: Hello there, new book!
1184 Jen March 14, 2013 at 8:39 pm: Can you make your next book scratch and sniff?
1185 JessaBee March 14, 2013 at 8:39 pm: Such a fabulisitic life event… as it would be if I had a copy of your book.
1186 Jen March 14, 2013 at 8:40 pm: You are amazing. But you already knew that. And I would love a copy!!! I am broke and still have not been able to buy one. I chose to feed my kids
Jen recently posted..Canvas
1187 PrincessBecs March 14, 2013 at 8:42 pm: Pick me! And congrats!
1188 Steve March 14, 2013 at 8:42 pm: Ooh-ooh-ooooh, Mr. Kooottteerrr! Oh, sorry….Ms. Kotter!
1189 tee March 14, 2013 at 8:43 pm: I NEED your paperback book because:
I was terminated from my job that I had for 11 years, I’m “only” 63 years old so I can’t retire without moving into an alley or a spot under the highway, no health insurance and its fucking freezing here in New England. Help a nurse out!!! I’m a psychiatric nurse so you know I’ve worked hard all my life, can you believe an RN got laid off? Health Care today – now that’s a joke. And about the Jodi Arias fiasco——–explain that to me like I’m a 6 year old. She already said she did it. ‘Nuff said.
You give me a book, I’ll hook you up with whatever psych advise, meds, or permission to stay in bed watching TV for a month.
I’d like to thank the academy…etc. etc etc.
1190 Myndie March 14, 2013 at 8:43 pm: You are one of the most awesome people EVER! Just so you know. I have an autographed copy of your book in hardback, but how can I lend someone a copy of your awesomeness without a copy of the paperback? There’s no way I am lending out the autographed copy!!!!!
1191 ajaire March 14, 2013 at 8:44 pm: Congrats on the success of the newest version of your book! I’ll have to get the paperback now to see the extra portions
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1192 PJ March 14, 2013 at 8:44 pm: Pick me
1193 Jeffrey Howard March 14, 2013 at 8:45 pm: I would love a copy.
1194 Kc March 14, 2013 at 8:45 pm: Weird that there appears to be a golden retriever at the book signing. Why is he on the book case?
1195 Hannah March 14, 2013 at 8:46 pm: I pre-ordered my copy via Amazon–along with a 25-pound bag of cat food, because kitty had food allergies–and the day you were closest to Milwaukee, Wisconsin (in Chicago) I had an engagement that I made three weeks ago. I would have loved to drive out and see you, but receiving a signed copy would be equally amazing.

Keep writing Jenny! Looking forward to many-a-scattered-brained posts from you.
Hannah recently posted..spinsterhood united
1196 Jean March 14, 2013 at 8:47 pm: Please pick me! I would love to send a copy back to the person who lovingly bought me a copy of your book in hardcover!
1197 Kikki March 14, 2013 at 8:48 pm: Someday I will actually make it to a book-signing/read/other author-interactive-thing. Someday.
You’re on the top of the list, Jenny!
1198 Emily March 14, 2013 at 8:50 pm: Put me in the running! I haven’t read it and would love to!
1199 KP March 14, 2013 at 8:50 pm: Ooh, I love paperbacks. Although they don’t make nearly as effective weapons – have you noticed that? Someone should get on that!
1200 j.c. March 14, 2013 at 8:52 pm: PLEASE PICK ME!!!???!!! Will see you when you are in San Francisco! YAY!!
1201 Luly March 14, 2013 at 8:52 pm: I am pretty sure a hamster makes no sound when being squeezed too tightly. They just go silent and you think they have relaxed enough to trust you and then you find out they are dead. (it was a gopher I was rescuing.) that’s how I earned my half of “the freeze ‘em & squeeze ‘em sisters”.
1202 Valerie P. March 14, 2013 at 8:52 pm: I’m jealous of EVERY on of those people! But, an autographed copy of your book would make it more bearable.

Congrats on #5!!!!
Valerie P. recently posted..Damned If You Do….Damned If You Don’t….
1203 Meredith B. March 14, 2013 at 8:54 pm: I listened to the audiobook and absolutely died of laughter on my way to and from work everyday! You are awesome and I would absolutely love a signed paperback copy of your book!! P.s. I sent my husband your post about McDonalds characters and he said it was the best thing I’ve ever sent him… It was THAT good.
1204 The Good Luck Duck March 14, 2013 at 8:54 pm: Me.
The Good Luck Duck recently posted..Dentist in Los Algodones, Baja California
1205 Untypically Jia March 14, 2013 at 8:55 pm: You deserve every last bit of wonderfulness Jenny! I only wish I could have been there!
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1206 Cactus Sally March 14, 2013 at 8:55 pm: Je voudrais une copie de votre nouveau livre parce que j’ai entendu dire que c’est un divertissement comme Liberace! Vous êtes un fabuleux petit chou!

avec une grande admiration,

Cactus Sally
1207 Susan nunes March 14, 2013 at 8:57 pm: Looking forward to seeing you speak on the west coast!
1208 Nat March 14, 2013 at 9:00 pm: Congratulations! You deserve all of the success.
Nat recently posted..How to tell someone that you bled vagina blood on their chair and also stabbed it with a pair of scissors. Twice.
1209 Annette G March 14, 2013 at 9:00 pm: Seriously… PICK ME. Or not seriously. Just, pick me!!!
1210 MGH March 14, 2013 at 9:00 pm: Congrats! I want to be part of your bad-ass tribe, so I hope you pick me.
1211 Jessica H March 14, 2013 at 9:01 pm: I’m so sorry I missed you in St. Louis – I would have gotten drunk in a basement for you, but far less important things got in the way.
1212 Andi March 14, 2013 at 9:01 pm: Me me me me me me me me me me… me
1213 Kelly and Geoff March 14, 2013 at 9:03 pm: Wow, I wish I was in that picture.
Kelly and Geoff recently posted..Come see me! SLAM St.Patrick’s Local Artist Market – Saturday March 16th
1214 Meghan March 14, 2013 at 9:05 pm: You deserve every single good thing that comes your way! Congratulations! I can’t thank you enough for helping me realize that there’s a bunch of us anxious weirdos out there, and I couldn’t be more proud to be part of the tribe.
1215 Heidi Wordhouse March 14, 2013 at 9:06 pm: I live 16 miles of dirt road from the nearest no-traffic light town. I’d love to read your book out loud to my chickens and cows, some of whom are very nice. I think Admiral Nelson the rooster could use some cheering up.
1216 Dawn in WI March 14, 2013 at 9:06 pm: I would love to have a signed copy of your book!
1217 Kari Johnson March 14, 2013 at 9:07 pm: More love for you and the book. Can’t get enough of the Bloggess!
1218 Heather March 14, 2013 at 9:07 pm: I have the hardback, and now I need the paperback, and I really need something to read.
1219 Jill Kaplan March 14, 2013 at 9:09 pm: I certainly wish I could have made it to one of the stops, alas distance and unfortunate timing prevented me from being in attendance.
1220 Traci March 14, 2013 at 9:09 pm: Would love a signed copy……please keep writing!!!!!!
1221 karen March 14, 2013 at 9:10 pm: Wow. There’s already over 1200 comments, so i have like, NO CHANCE of winning, but i’d really like to read the bonus chapter!
1222 Kristi March 14, 2013 at 9:10 pm: I don’t have one yet! But I want one real bad!
1223 Jools March 14, 2013 at 9:12 pm: I need the new copy so I can give the old one to my daughter. Hell with Chicken Soup books, this is a life changer!
1224 Didi W. March 14, 2013 at 9:16 pm: You rock, and not just because of the preserved carcasses and creepy dolls. Although they are definitely part of it. Enjoy your well-deserved success!
1225 Rebecca R. March 14, 2013 at 9:16 pm: If I had money, I would buy the paperback, then give my hardcover to a random person as a gift.
1226 Brenda March 14, 2013 at 9:17 pm: Oooo, pick me. I want a copy with a bonus chapter.
Brenda recently posted.."Please Mayor Bloomberg, help me control my sugar intake!"
1227 Cathy K March 14, 2013 at 9:18 pm: I must read the bonus chapter!
1228 J. Whiston March 14, 2013 at 9:19 pm: As a fellow John Green fan, I think you rock.
1229 Amanda March 14, 2013 at 9:19 pm: Oh, I would love another copy so I could give it to my best friend!
Amanda recently posted..In Laughter
1230 Mark Fryerparts March 14, 2013 at 9:19 pm: i would love to gift one to my sister
1231 PalenMisha March 14, 2013 at 9:20 pm: Of that guy in the bottom left corner of the picture who is wearing the red ‘dress’ I have to say: that is awesome. I love it.
1232 AngieG March 14, 2013 at 9:22 pm: I would love a copy!!!!!
1233 Christine N March 14, 2013 at 9:25 pm: Please pick me! I would love a copy in NZ
1234 jess miller March 14, 2013 at 9:27 pm: Congrats!!! Can’t wait for the next book!
1235 jo March 14, 2013 at 9:27 pm: I am so happy for your success!
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1236 Trystan March 14, 2013 at 9:27 pm: pick meeeeeee!
1237 Tammy March 14, 2013 at 9:28 pm: Please come to Southern California (specifically Irvine in Orange County)!! I’d love to meet you!
1238 Sara March 14, 2013 at 9:28 pm: I bought your book, got the faceplate, then bought another copy so I could go to a signing. My friends couldn’t go, so I brought their books too. Now I have my copy, and my lend out copy. I took the CD out of the library just to get the outtakes, and want to know if the extra chapter on the CD is the same as the one in the paperback. I promise the book will have a good home, and I will never ever let my children squeeze hamsters.

I cannot guarentee the saftey of small furry creatures if I don’t get picked. Their little lives are in your hands.

P.S. No animals were injured in the course of this comment.
P.P.S. I just remembered your penchant for taxidermied rodentia, so perhaps not the best “incentive” on my part.
P.P.P.S. I also just rememebered that it’s ethical-they-died-of-natural-causes-and-then-they-were-stuffed taxidermy you’re into, so back on.
P.P.P.P.S. I would actually be thrilled if you just replied to this comment, given that it is the 1200ish one. I would totally give my vote to one of the other commenters who couldn’t afford your book.
1239 Kzspot March 14, 2013 at 9:30 pm: Me! Me! Me!

Please.
1240 Sara March 14, 2013 at 9:33 pm: P.P.P.P.P.S The signing was in New Jersey, and I totally got lost in Newark on my way back. Turns out some of the streets there are one way. Go figure. Had to call my husband for directions. Just sayin’.
1241 Joanna March 14, 2013 at 9:33 pm: ahhhhh! I want a copy!!!
1242 Kathy March 14, 2013 at 9:33 pm: The weirder the better if ya ask me!
1243 wendy March 14, 2013 at 9:34 pm: Crossing my fingers (and my eyes!) – congrats!!!
1244 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 9:35 pm: It would be amazing if you picked me. Like one in a million odds here. Ok so more like 5 in 1236 ish. But so close to one in a million. We share the same name. does that help me?
1245 marjorie March 14, 2013 at 9:35 pm: Would, of course, love a signed copy. Will, of course, always love you!
1246 Heather March 14, 2013 at 9:36 pm: sigh……… Okay okay – there are already over 1200 flippin comments soooooooo I think that pretty much illustrates my chances of zilch. Sides I fell pray to the hardback pre-ordering last time around – and supposedly if we “pre-ordered” we’d get an autographed book plate (( fail.

I love reading your stuff & peepin’ in your mind/life – you make me laugh, you make me cry, you make me read out loud to my husband. I am so glad you’re “makin’ it”!!! You go girl!! If I had ever been lucky enuf to receive a red dress I would want to put it on right now for you!

And now that I’ve written all that in vein (I told myself I was not going to try to win you over with clever or witty reparte) fail. I was going to just simply say, “pick me P L E A S E ”
1247 MeganlyMeg March 14, 2013 at 9:37 pm: Congratulations. What a huge accomplishment. Great work!
MeganlyMeg recently posted..My Scale is a Big Fat Liar
1248 Socal Rachel March 14, 2013 at 9:38 pm: Congrats on the NYT list! I loved your book and would love to win to read the extra chapter!
Socal Rachel recently posted..Christmas Fun Run in Tutu’s
1249 Cheryll Fochtmann March 14, 2013 at 9:40 pm: PICK Me, oh please pick me! I live in Alabama and was able to convince my husband to go to Georgia to get a copy of your hardback book and have you autograph it just because he supports my reading fetish!!
1250 Mary March 14, 2013 at 9:43 pm: Pick meeee! I need to loan my father my copy but it’s autographed and therefore it doesn’t get to leave my home. Also I think he might be sort of confused by the “fuck arthritis” scrawled inscription without proper explanation. What I’m saying is I need a new, less sentimental copy to read the new chapter out of and then loan out to several awesome people in my life.
Mary recently posted..A Windy Day at Work
1251 Carrie Love March 14, 2013 at 9:45 pm: I would love a copy! Buying a new book is a rare luxury for me these days.
1252 Raven Michelle March 14, 2013 at 9:46 pm: Congrats on all your success!
I so wish you were coming to Dallas so I could meet you!
1253 Amber March 14, 2013 at 9:48 pm: I’m terribly sad that you are not coming to the easily offended Salt Lake City. I know you have at least…4 die hard fans here!! I hope you a wonderful book tour. (I’d also love, love, love a copy of your book)
1254 Tiffany Nielsen March 14, 2013 at 9:48 pm: I loved the book and recommended it to several peeps who also loved it! But, because I am a heathen who now reads books on my I-pad, I cannot get the we chapter. Now I haz a sad…..
1255 Southern Girl March 14, 2013 at 9:48 pm: Congrats, the book is hilarious and has kept me company on all of my recent flights–well after I wake up and stop snoring it makes me laugh.
Southern Girl recently posted..Forgot to Share But it’s Okay
1256 Cassandra S. March 14, 2013 at 9:49 pm: For a signed copy of your book I would gladly send you my only child to do all your household chores and cooking. Or possibly some adorable pics of my cats snuggling. You know, whichever one is legal. Oh, and I’ll also be your best friend for life!
1257 Sheila March 14, 2013 at 9:49 pm: Fantastic! You are such fun to read.
1258 Jen D. March 14, 2013 at 9:50 pm: Squee! Just invited a friend to come see you in Phx!!! I’d love a signed book, tho, since I hate standing in line ;P. See you on April 4th!
1259 Kalee March 14, 2013 at 9:50 pm: I’d love to read the bonus chapter!
1260 Kasey March 14, 2013 at 9:51 pm: Sending west Texas love! Pick me!
1261 jessica deegan March 14, 2013 at 9:51 pm: Oddly enough, I stumbled upon your blog after going to a book signing for Stephenie Meyer (long story!) Anyway, I think you’re hillarious and I would LOVE to read your book! (Your signed, free book) xoxo
1262 nikk March 14, 2013 at 9:51 pm: MEEEEE PLEEEEASE! Saturday is my birthday, I turn 26 and have to buy my own insurance..a book would pretty much make up for that
1263 Tisha March 14, 2013 at 9:52 pm: Me, me, pick me!!!
Tisha recently posted..Hi there…
1264 bec March 14, 2013 at 9:54 pm: well, i just had to add my little blurb here to water down the numbers and increase the odds against all of us. you’re all welcome.
1265 Beth Freeland March 14, 2013 at 9:55 pm: Please……Thank You.
1266 Ray March 14, 2013 at 9:55 pm: I would love a signed book!!! Pick me por favor!
1267 Kya March 14, 2013 at 9:57 pm: I’d love any copy of your book! Signed would be even better.
1268 Jen K March 14, 2013 at 9:58 pm: Awesome news! Adding my name to the list
1269 Daniel March 14, 2013 at 9:58 pm: Such an excellent author!
1270 Kattie March 14, 2013 at 10:00 pm: I would just love a copy of the paperback. The kindle version just doesn’t compare to holding a book. Plus a bonus chapter, who wouldn’t want that?
Kattie recently posted..That’s it
1271 Robyn March 14, 2013 at 10:01 pm: I collect signed books! I loved your book – we read it for book club a few months ago!
Robyn recently posted..Taught
1272 Cathy March 14, 2013 at 10:11 pm: You are awesome Jenny. Loved seeing you in San Diego last year.
1273 Amanda March 14, 2013 at 10:11 pm: Congrats! Hope the next leg of the tour is even better than the first.
1274 G. James March 14, 2013 at 10:15 pm: Please pick me. We’ll be by to see you when you come out to the west coast.
1275 Jeanne K. March 14, 2013 at 10:16 pm: I want to see you for real…. but I am going out of town while you’re in KC. Gotta get my book somehow!
1276 Whitney Petch March 14, 2013 at 10:17 pm: That would be amazing! I would love to win!
1277 CrystalHerself March 14, 2013 at 10:18 pm: I’d love an autographed copy! I live in such a small town that NO author ever visits us, much less one as cool as you!
1278 Sarah March 14, 2013 at 10:19 pm: Please pick me so that I don’t have to wait until I go home again to borrow(steal) my sister’s copy to read it!
1279 Josie March 14, 2013 at 10:19 pm: Would love to give the autographed paperback copy to my best friend Angel, who gave me the hard-cover for Xmas.
P.S. Thanks for making us laugh
1280 Katie March 14, 2013 at 10:20 pm: Yay! I sadly missed you in STL, and this could be my consolation, haha.
1281 Rose Peck March 14, 2013 at 10:22 pm: A free book? I want it!
Thank you
Rose Peck recently posted..To Preschool or Not to Preschool
1282 Krista March 14, 2013 at 10:22 pm: You’re so inspiring. I love how you can make so many experiences into positives. I hope my children see me as inspiring as I see you today!
1283 Victoria March 14, 2013 at 10:24 pm: Congrats! I loved loved LOVED your audio book. You singing the chapter titles was the greatest thing ever (and I am still planning on playing the vagina drinking game). I want an autographed copy of your paper back so badly! I wanted to preorder with the signed – what’s it called? Nameplate? But I couldn’t get it in Canada. Pretty please pick me. I would be ecstatic
1284 The Anonymous Dad March 14, 2013 at 10:28 pm: So how much do I love your book and your blog?

I’m going to stand on the shoulder of the freeway on ramp and panhandle until I have at least twenty bucks.

After which, I will hitch a ride to Vegas.

Where I will parlay that twenty dollars at the black table into…….nothing. I suck at gambling.

Which will then lead me to steal a toddlers wooden block

Which I will carve into a gun shape by gnawing on it with my tooth. ( yes, tooth, dentists are too expensive. )

And will then use said carved (sorta) gun to rob a casino. But not the Bellagio. In fact, I better not say
Which one.

Which will net me enough dough to buy a small Island.

So I can start my own country.

And the reason for all this, is so I can put that funky caped mouse on your book cover on the flag, and
Call the currency Jennys, and name the country…… Lawsonlandia.

YOU’RE WELCOME.
The Anonymous Dad recently posted..Singlehandedly solving the shortage of affordable housing
1285 JCfromNC March 14, 2013 at 10:31 pm: Pick me, pick me! I really regret not making that 3 hour drive to see you last tour when you passed through Charlotte.
1286 Jeff March 14, 2013 at 10:36 pm: Would love a copy
1287 B Louie March 14, 2013 at 10:38 pm: Congrats! I would love a chance to read the new chapter. Best of luck with the rest of your tour.
1288 Hollie March 14, 2013 at 10:40 pm: I would love to have a chance at this, thanks!
1289 Lori March 14, 2013 at 10:41 pm: I love reading your postings — I bet the book is even better!
1290 Joel March 14, 2013 at 10:42 pm: You’re too awesome for words. And yet, I just wrote five of ‘em. Guess I’m a paradox wrapped in a tortilla.
1291 kim March 14, 2013 at 10:45 pm: Awesomeness
1292 Brett Minor (@brettminor) March 14, 2013 at 10:45 pm: My girlfriend and I were going to come see you when you were in St Louis a few weeks ago, but I ended up having to work.

I loved your book, but do not own one. I had to check it out from the library. Would love to have one.
Brett Minor (@brettminor) recently posted..Prepping for A to Z Challenge
1293 Bev March 14, 2013 at 10:46 pm: What’s the only thing better than a copy of “Let’s Pretend this never Happened?”
TWO copies, of course.
1294 wowieann March 14, 2013 at 10:47 pm: Pick meeeeee! That’s the sound of a 42-year-old that’s jonesing to read the bonus chapter!
1295 Tracy @mamacreates March 14, 2013 at 10:51 pm: Growing up in Alaska, the child of a hunter, I have the image of gutted deer hanging from my swingset permanently embedded in my brain. Point being, I quite literally laughed out loud when reading your account of having run into, and inside of, a deer. And though i’ve found myself inside of a deer, I’m nevertheless proud to say I could relate to that particular Bloggess tale.

Many congratulations on your continued book success~
xo
1296 Krista March 14, 2013 at 10:55 pm: New chap-ter! New chap-ter! New chap-ter!!!!
1297 hotrodgal March 14, 2013 at 10:55 pm: I came to your reading in Houston, then promptly gave both copies I got signed away as gifts (before I could finish reading it even, though not before realizing that I have been to the tiny west TX towns you talked about – my ex was from Grape Creek!). Anyway, I would love to finish the book and have my own copy to keep!
1298 Melanie March 14, 2013 at 10:56 pm: I’d love a copy! I haven’t been able to afford a new book lately, but it’s on my to-read list one day!
1299 Anonymous March 14, 2013 at 10:56 pm: I’d love to be chosen!
1300 Dabsmom March 14, 2013 at 10:57 pm: If a new friend is easily insulted by it. They’ll be an old friend pretty soon.
1301 Anonymous March 14, 2013 at 10:58 pm: Pick mEEEEEEEEEEEE!
1302 Hannah March 14, 2013 at 10:58 pm: I am one of the many who would love to be in your (ever growing) pile of names for selection. =) I own the book as an e-book (before I even owned an e-reader, so I have it on my PHONE in the stupid iBooks app which is where I still read it) but would love to have an actual tangible copy. Regardless, you continually rock and whoever the five are are lucky ducks. So glad you’re enjoying your tour!
1303 Jen March 14, 2013 at 11:00 pm: Dear Jenny,

I realize that this may never find you because you get like 200+ comments every day, BUT, I just wanted to say… I’m totally jealous of your crazy family. I know that sounds weird and I’m sure I don’t get nearly a tenth of what it must have been like to be you with your family, but when I read your book, I’m jealous of your crazy family. My crazy family just makes me hurt a lot inside, and left me with PTSD as a nice parting gift. When I read about your crazy family it cracks me the hell up, and I think you turned out amazing and we’d be best friends if I lived in Texas and went to parties where you talked about giant metal dildos you get in Kate Spade bags. Your book lifts me up. Thank you for sharing with the world.
1304 Rachel March 14, 2013 at 11:03 pm: I’m another one anxious to read the bonus chapter!
1305 tanya ci March 14, 2013 at 11:04 pm: I’d love a copy for the extra chapter. I keep telling people to read the book just for the HR stories; so pe the pants funny.
1306 jeanine March 14, 2013 at 11:09 pm: oooo paper!…im certain my biped would love a book made of paper…or anything made of paper, really…especially w inky namey things on…as i am sans thumbs and as such unable to hold a book or turn pages, i must enjoy the electronic version of your writings (btw, i feel mr thomcat is somehow exploited, but perhaps thats just me)…of course, i refuse to share it w my biped (she was late feeding me on 14 june 2009), so a paper version would make her very happy…anyway, *yawn*, i feel a nap coming on…consider it, wont you?…

diana (jeanines 4legged)
1307 Tanglegirl March 14, 2013 at 11:11 pm: Congratulations on the NYT redux. Wow!
1308 Stacy March 14, 2013 at 11:12 pm: Me, me, oh pick me!! I am slightly bitter that Denver was not included in this tour, though, not going to lie. I bought a copy of your book to cheer a depressed friend up last year…. and she didn’t get it….and we are not really friends anymore. But I have more friends who *could* use a copy, and I want it in hardback, myself anyways. I have the kindle version, and so if you pick me, it would be a dilemma to keep it, or to give as a gift. It is a battle I am willing to fight. Just saying.
1309 jess March 14, 2013 at 11:17 pm: you have been so oddly inspirational to me….i feel like i have my shit together because of you, so THANKS! p.s. PICK ME
1310 Sylvhar March 14, 2013 at 11:17 pm: Pick me, pick me! And huge congrats, what an achievement!
1311 Shelly March 14, 2013 at 11:18 pm: Please pick me! I bought two of your hard cover copies. I kept one for myself and have the second to my sister (our parents are crazy too). Then I lent my copy to a friend and she never gave it back, I believe she’s lent her lented (? Suuure) copy out. Please!
1312 Tank Girl March 14, 2013 at 11:18 pm: Knock knock mother f—–!!!
Glad to see someone with an original take on life make it to the New York Times best seller list!!!! Congrats, you’ve earned it!!!!
Tank Girl recently posted..How Do You Know?
1313 Scout March 14, 2013 at 11:18 pm: Saw you in StLouis last week, awesome! Have shared your book, blog, and you with tons of friends. You deserve all of the praise given. Now, when’s the next book??
1314 Beth March 14, 2013 at 11:21 pm: I am blaming you for my lack of sleep and subsequent large amount of Mountain Dew consumption at work the next day (making me sound like the hamster) . I just bought the paperback. I usually read a few (like 5) pages of whatever book I am reading in bed before I pass out each night. I was up until 4 AM reading as your book is too damned good to be put down. Don’t you want to inspire another sleepless night, large caffeine consumption, and hamster-speak?
1315 Teresa Z March 14, 2013 at 11:24 pm: You should pick me because you aren’t coming close enough for me to see you!!!!
1316 Valerie March 14, 2013 at 11:26 pm: I wish you were coming back to GA ~~maybe this time I could actually peel myself away from the window and meet you ~~~~
1317 Robin March 14, 2013 at 11:27 pm: Would love the new one! I’ll read ur new chapter then give paperback to another nutcase in Nashville, where YOU DO have a following. Thanks for being who u r and so transparent. Come here for Southern Festival of Books in October. You’ll love the people!
1318 Kristen March 14, 2013 at 11:31 pm: Hope I’m the lucky one.
1319 conny March 14, 2013 at 11:31 pm: is that a dog on the cupboard in the back?
1320 Louise March 14, 2013 at 11:35 pm: I want one pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. It would make up for the pain of your book tour not being extended to Canada.
1321 goingloopy March 14, 2013 at 11:36 pm: I think most of my nutty friends have already read the book, but there might be a lurker somewhere…I wish you were coming to Oklahoma so we could see you in person.
goingloopy recently posted..My night is colored headache gray.
1322 Pecheez March 14, 2013 at 11:36 pm: If you sign my butt, I’ll have a tattoo artist tattoo over your signature so I will always sit on your name. That sounds better in my head.
1323 Heather March 14, 2013 at 11:36 pm: J’aimerais bien d’avoir ton livre magnifique. There, did that catch your attention? I hope so because I surely would love a signed copy of your fantastic book.
1324 jamie March 14, 2013 at 11:37 pm: I’m sure Portland is lovely, but Eugene if fabulous. You should let us come see you here. I’ll make you mini-elairs.
1325 Lora March 14, 2013 at 11:39 pm: Me! Pick me!
1326 Lisa Johnson March 14, 2013 at 11:40 pm: Ok…here’s the scoop: I have NOT yet read your book. I keep trying to get it from the library but it’s always on hold… SO then I put it on my wish list on paperbackswap.com (love this site!) and still nothing… SO I didn’t know until I just read your last blog post that there’s an xtra chapter in the new paperback edition! Yay! SO maybe you MIGHT TAKE PITY ON ME and gift me with your book so I can finally know what the hell all the hub bub is about! I have a feeling it’s gonna be a pretty rockin’ literary experience as every other book I have on my shelf is a self help book (raspberry) so obviously I’m living a slightly deprived existence….

((hugs))
1327 Brian the Human Turducken March 14, 2013 at 11:43 pm: Congratulations, No. 5! You don’t climb that high on the NYT list unless your book is REALLY good. I’m looking forward to picking up the paperback so I can read the bonus chapter.

To say you’re a part of this bizarre tribe is an understatement, for you are our leader, our tribal chieftain… I mean chieftainess? You’re like the bizarre tribal queen over all us loyal, bizarre followers, aka minions.
Brian the Human Turducken recently posted..Habemus Blogum
1328 Jennifer March 14, 2013 at 11:45 pm: Pick me! Pick me!
I’d come to a book signing, but you don’t have any scheduled in the Middle East!
1329 Cami March 14, 2013 at 11:48 pm: I am SO glad this book is doing so well for you! You deserve every last bit of awesome it brings you =)
1330 Kristie Gibney March 14, 2013 at 11:50 pm: I have already given your book to no less than 10 people in my life. I’m sure there is someone I have forgotten, so I would love to have yet another copy!
1331 Lisa Newlin March 14, 2013 at 11:54 pm: Honestly, I feel like Jenkins should be thanked for the success of this book as well. He was the classic underdog story, and a beacon of hope and encouragement in an otherwise negative and drab world. I mean, except until he met his untimely demise…but you know…until then…he was a true inspiration.

Speaking of a negative and drab world, I live in St. Louis, and was out of town when you were here, so I didn’t get to come to your event and impress upon you that we are truly soulmates. It’s probably for the best though, as I don’t need ANOTHER restraining order against me (although word on the street is you get a special prize for your 7th one. Fingers crossed!)
Lisa Newlin recently posted..Children’s books you won’t see published
1332 Tippy March 14, 2013 at 11:55 pm: Please say you’re coming back to Denver. Depressions been shadowing me all winter and I need something to look forward to.
1333 Kirsten March 14, 2013 at 11:57 pm: Although my heart is broken because you didn’t venture farther north that Seattle … I am throwing my name in the hat for an autographed copy of your paperback. I bought the sole copy of the hardback at my local bookstore and they looked at me like I was crazy when I squealed with glee that they had it.

I’ve read excerpts of it to my coworkers, and lemme tell you, you are a big hit here in Juneau AK COME SEE US!
1334 Jenn March 14, 2013 at 11:59 pm: Jenny,

I’m so grateful for your deep honesty. It shows me that I can take the risk of being real for people. And thank you for your awesome sense of humor! Congrats on the book ranking! I’m sure it is a wonderful book. I’m so glad you write.
1335 KellyK March 14, 2013 at 11:59 pm: You deserve to feel so good. Yayyyy you!
1336 Shana March 15, 2013 at 12:01 am: Pick me! I NEED to give a signed copy to my sister as a gift!
1337 Alli J March 15, 2013 at 12:02 am: I’ve followed you a while, & you’ve clearly rubbed off – I was told recently that my FB updates remind a fellow fan of your blog. I’m not sure if this is a compliment or not, but we’re clearly combining our forces in a bizarre world sized mind meld. For this reason I feel I should read your book, but I’m enormously underpaid (and feeding a depressing SIX cats- I don’t even *like* cats, what is my life?!), so I need to be gifted one. It’s clearly the right thing to do. And I’ll even dish out an extra kitty cuddle on your behalf – you’d be *patting kitties on the other side of the world*. That officially gives you a superpower. You’re *welcome*. Also, this huge comment was really difficult to write on a tiny iPhone keypad, so there’s that…
Kia kaha from Aotearoa
1338 Natalie March 15, 2013 at 12:02 am: Me! Pick me!
1339 Amanda March 15, 2013 at 12:10 am: I don’t suppose there’s any chance you’ll come to Beijing?
Amanda recently posted..a fantastic weekend & time is flying.
1340 Mandy March 15, 2013 at 12:15 am: I want a copy so badly!
1341 edj March 15, 2013 at 12:16 am: Ooh! Ooh! Pick me! Pick me!

Please?
1342 Angie March 15, 2013 at 12:16 am: Unfortunately when you came to Denver last year I had no idea who you were so I didn’t bother to go to the book signing. Too bad it’s not possible to kick my own ass!
Angie recently posted..God of War Ascension-Review
1343 Nicole March 15, 2013 at 12:20 am: I never win anything but I figure it is worth a shot. I would love your book.
1344 Emily M March 15, 2013 at 12:22 am: This blog and your book let me forget about whatever’s going on in my life so I can laugh for a moment and feel better about my strange thoughts. So thank YOU

PS: I would love to read this new bonus chapter without loitering suspiciously between the shelves at Barnes & Noble…wouldn’t want to disturb the people around me with my not-so-subtle snickering…
Emily M recently posted..Liquid Fantasies
1345 Johnna March 15, 2013 at 12:26 am: I have the hard copy and the e-book. Unfortunately Anchorage is not on your tour list and as I’m moving from Alaska to Texas in a month or so I’m broke. I would dearly cherish a signed copy. Not to mention be estatic to read the bonus chapters!!!!!
1346 Desiree March 15, 2013 at 12:32 am: I am dying to read the book. Especially as I’m obsessed with the blog! I
1347 Julie March 15, 2013 at 12:42 am: It took someone VERY special to put a community like THIS great together. Thankgawd YOU are that person!

Also, we NEED a copy. Don’t own one, had to pester our local library to buy some. And then I forced my husband to read it. Extra chapter? Yes, please.
Julie recently posted..Sometimes It Totally All Works.
1348 Julie March 15, 2013 at 12:44 am: “… like this great…?”
Really? Do you even TRY proofreading, Jul?

Gah, whatever. You’ll probably understand.
Julie recently posted..Sometimes It Totally All Works.
1349 Jason March 15, 2013 at 12:45 am: Congrats, ye bloggess. Now try to breath for a few…….and then get back to it.
Get some R & R.

Jason
The Cheeky Daddy
Jason recently posted..Easter Oreo Pops In Production!
1350 Jessica Larsen March 15, 2013 at 12:47 am: Jenny,
You’re the best! Congrats on number 5! Thank you for being my light when facing depression.
Jessica
1351 Jen W. March 15, 2013 at 12:51 am: My husband wants to start a support group for Victor. I’ll stay on your team as I’m consistently impressed with your enthusiasm for life. And your enthusiasm for the strange.
1352 Laurie March 15, 2013 at 1:00 am: You’re awesome. And you have a ton of followers… seriously.
1353 Rachel March 15, 2013 at 1:02 am: You are awesome Bloggess…
that is all. XXX
1354 Bailey March 15, 2013 at 1:03 am: I would totally love a signed copy paper back!! I went to your hard cover signing, and the lady that took our picture….totally didn’t take it. So a paper back signed copy would totally make up for that
Bailey recently posted..29 week update
1355 Bailey March 15, 2013 at 1:04 am: Why did I say “totally” so many times?! Get it together Bailey!
Bailey recently posted..29 week update
1356 Danie Honeybun March 15, 2013 at 1:08 am: well, i know i said i would die if you didn’t come to the Seattle/Tacoma/my house area of Washington State, but i am pretty sure i’ll die even MORE if i am not blessed with one of your books.

i’ve got the e-copy (which you should be happy that i purchased rather than pirated like a horrible thief), but i would ADORE a real, i-can-hold-it-in-my-hands-and-deface-it-with-highlighter version.

good GOD i would adore that!
Danie Honeybun recently posted..March 2013…
1357 Moniksca March 15, 2013 at 1:08 am: Love your book!
Moniksca recently posted..Vietnamese Coconut Sticky Rice with Black Eyed Beans Recipe
1358 Saskia March 15, 2013 at 1:08 am: I´d love a copy of your book and I would love to come to your ook tour, unfortunately there´s an ocean keeping me away….(For real, I´m German.).
1359 Caitlin March 15, 2013 at 1:11 am: Thank YOU Jenny, for continuing to be awesome through all the good times and bad, and putting a smile on my face every time you post. You deserve all the success you have and more.
From a sixteen year old girl in Australia, thanks for being an inspiration, Bloggess.
1360 Liz March 15, 2013 at 1:17 am: do me! I mean: pick me!
1361 Holly March 15, 2013 at 1:25 am: I adore you! <3 That is all…
Holly recently posted..Here we go again…
1362 Ariane March 15, 2013 at 1:33 am: My cousin gave me a copy of your hardcover for my birthday last year and had it signed at a convention by Felicia Day as Jenny Lawson in regard to you promo-video, which I thought was great.
To have a copy signed by you, though, would top that.
1363 Katy G March 15, 2013 at 1:42 am: I went to your signing in PDX, but Powell’s had sold out before I got there!
1364 Katy March 15, 2013 at 1:43 am: Congratulations!! I am so thrilled to see you have such success.

I am so sad that I don’t get to see you in Kansas City. But alas I am in France with 21 high school students.
1365 Sophia Holder March 15, 2013 at 1:57 am: A signed copy of the book? Worth a shot! I’d love to be in the running!
1366 Elektra March 15, 2013 at 2:00 am: Shiny. I so want to read the new chapter.
1367 Laura March 15, 2013 at 2:06 am: Any chance of you coming to London on this tour? It’s lovely this time of year. Also, I should totally win because I have sick twins to contend with. Yep, for ten hours of today it’s just me and two eight-month-olds with vomiting and diarrhoea. I bet you’re jealous!
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1368 Erin Lee March 15, 2013 at 2:13 am: So jealous to see the tour is not coming to Canada but ever so delighted to hear it is going well for you!! I would love to win one of the signed copies! You are one of my favorite writers, and the only writers who has made me wake up my husband laughing while reading in bed.
1369 Bridget March 15, 2013 at 2:13 am: Thank you for sharing your life with all of us, and for letting us share our lives with you. I’d dig winning the book because I intended to buy it but life and money aren’t working out for things like books…
1370 yvette M March 15, 2013 at 2:15 am: I would really like your book, so please randomly pick me:)
1371 Allizon March 15, 2013 at 2:18 am: I hope to win a copy and then gift my old copy to a lucky friend.
1372 Amanda Jones March 15, 2013 at 2:32 am: I would love to win a copy of your book!
1373 Amanda March 15, 2013 at 2:35 am: It would make a great shelf-buddy for my hardback…

Hopefully, your travels will bring you back to the NW for another reading (we got the cleanse and the serial killer cat last time. SO GREAT.). It was pretty awesome, I actually ran into friends that I didn’t know were already Bloggess fans… probably should have known, now that I think about it.

<3
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1374 Teresa March 15, 2013 at 2:39 am: I’d love to win a copy!
Thanks!
1375 livvi March 15, 2013 at 2:41 am: If I win the book, I’m gonna use the money I would otherwise have spent on it to force my friend to finally read A Fault in Our Stars by locking her in a closet with a copy.
1376 Kayla Hamby March 15, 2013 at 2:44 am: My best friend and I love your blog so much. I found it when I was pregnant and stressed last year and I read it constantly. Then when my daughter was born and up at all hours of the night, I’d stay up reading it so I didn’t fall asleep rocking her lol. Now my best friend is pregnant, and so I passed you on to her, and she relates to you so much. She also has some crazy anxiety problems And she adores you. We were wanting to come see you on your your, but the closest you came to us was 3 1/2 hours away- and she has to work that day (Louisville ky, on Monday) and I couldn’t go without her. Anyway, her birthday was last week, and mines next week. So one of us totally needs that book. And by one of us- I actually mean her because if I get it I would trade her and take her hardback and give her this one… Because I couldn’t be without one haha!
1377 Ashley March 15, 2013 at 2:46 am: You’re on a giant wait list at my library, so I would love a copy! Also, I tried seeing you when you were in Chicago, but I was put on bed rest and couldn’t, then I had a baby and couldn’t…maybe come again this summer?!!
1378 Kate March 15, 2013 at 3:01 am: You mean I didn’t have to steal my library’s copy? I could have just waited to win it??

(I didn’t. Steal it, I mean)
1379 Sylvia March 15, 2013 at 3:28 am: This is totally the best weird tribe of them all, and you are one of our beloved totems. Or maybe idols. Whichever most applies where giant metal chickens and homicidal dead monkey are concerned

Also: Book! Ooooooh yes, please!!
1380 Gloria Angell March 15, 2013 at 3:36 am: So happy for you!
1381 Darlene March 15, 2013 at 3:37 am: If you came to Miami again, I’d be able to have you sign my paperback. *Fingers crossed* Pick me. Pick me. Pick me. Please?
1382 Alison March 15, 2013 at 3:41 am: I’d love a copy – not sure if you ship to Australia though. How about a book tour down here??
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1383 Michelle March 15, 2013 at 3:50 am: I’d really love to win a copy of your book, mostly because I live in Poland, and there is quite literally NO CHANCE that I’ll be able to buy your book in a book store here. And do you know how much it costs to ship a book to Poland after buying it on Amazon? MUCHO MUCHO MONEY!

So, please. Take pity on me and my bank account. And pick me! Please!
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1384 Kaitlyn March 15, 2013 at 4:19 am: I live in the UK and you haven’t toured the UK which means that my fandom has gone unrecognised which is totally why you should send me an autographed copy of your book. That and I can totally hook you up with some amazing taxidermy creatures if you fancy it because London is full of weird…uh, cool sh*t like that.
Kaitlyn recently posted..Farewell to Central Saint Martins…
1385 Extatic Insanity March 15, 2013 at 4:23 am: I thought of writing a big speech about how you make my life better and since discovering your blog I have reason to get out of bed, but that is just to kiss-ass for my liking. So I will rather tell you to pick me because I am amazing and it’s your loss in life for not having met me already.
1386 katcheya March 15, 2013 at 4:34 am: I’m glad the tour is going so well! That’s really awesome!
1387 Jennifer Masterson March 15, 2013 at 4:39 am: Pick Me! I don’t have one yet and I would really love it!!
1388 Mel P March 15, 2013 at 4:39 am: OOOHHHH me!!!!!!

I do own it on my Kindle but I would LOVE a copy that I can share among my also crazy friends! Or maybe I’ll just buy them one…. but help get me started!!!!
1389 Fatima March 15, 2013 at 4:39 am: Please please please come and visit us in Australia!
1390 Dave DeBaeremaeker March 15, 2013 at 4:47 am: I’d love a copy. Huge fan.
1391 Catherine March 15, 2013 at 4:54 am: Hi Jenny, I have been an avid reader of your blog for about 2 years, and really love your stuff. I hail from Sunny South Africa and for some reason I can’t buy your book on Kindle. Publication laws I think I would love it if you were able to send me a copy because I have been wanting to get it since it came out in hard back.
1392 Dave Weddle March 15, 2013 at 4:59 am: Congrats on the book hitting number 5.
1393 Laura G. March 15, 2013 at 5:03 am: i love the idea of people coming in alone and leaving as friends!
1394 Heather March 15, 2013 at 5:05 am: Jenny I would love a copy since I can’t see you live in person.
1395 Deirdre March 15, 2013 at 5:06 am: “the greatest part about touring is watching nervous people creep in alone but leave as groups of new friends.” Now that’s a quote worth sharing!

You rock Ms. Jenny
1396 Sherry Silguero March 15, 2013 at 5:08 am: So disappointed that I wasn’t able to come see you when you were in Chicago. I absolutely loved you book and am relatively new to your blog but can honestly say that I truly laugh out loud when I read your stories. My husband is always looking at me like I’m nuts or grumping at me because the bed is shaking from my laughing! Thanks for being such a bright spot in my life!
1397 E M Foster March 15, 2013 at 5:12 am: Congratulations, Jenny!!!

(Hopefully this post won’t show up as anonymous. Stupid iPad.)
1398 Helena Handcart March 15, 2013 at 5:13 am: Yes, please! You’re a rock star!
1399 Lisa March 15, 2013 at 5:18 am: I would love to see you…damn work always gets in my way.
1400 Jennifer March 15, 2013 at 5:22 am: I have a copy on my kindle which still needs to be read. Hopefully soon!
Jennifer recently posted..Here, here to the white rappers!
1401 LizT74 March 15, 2013 at 5:22 am: I have nothing witty or amusing to say. Congrats on the #5 you absolutely deserve it. I would absolutely love to win a copy, I would keep it pristine (except for reading the bonus chapter), but I’m in the UK and dunno if we’re included. More than anything though, I’d really like to buy the audio book version, any idea when we might get to be able to do that, I can only imagine how much more awesome your book is when read by you.
1402 IAmGiantWoman March 15, 2013 at 5:24 am: Please may you come to England and do a book tour?

A shop near me has a stuffed badger, and I’m not allowed to buy it unless you sign the stand it is on. MrGiantwoman said so. Plus I want to make armour for it…
1403 Beckles March 15, 2013 at 5:24 am: I SO wish I could have gone to see you in Jersey…can you do a just because tour? With Beyonce?
1404 Janine March 15, 2013 at 5:27 am: Yay! Congratulations!
1405 Jennifer March 15, 2013 at 5:31 am: Congrats! I wish you were coming to the DC area…*hint* *hint*
1406 Melissa B March 15, 2013 at 5:32 am: Congrats! Would love a signed copy!!!#
1407 Angie March 15, 2013 at 5:32 am: Pick me! A signed copy would be amazing!
1408 Richard Tetrault March 15, 2013 at 5:33 am: My copy is en route from Amazon even as I type, but if you pick me for an autographed copy I’ll give the one I’ve bought to an underprivileged yet deserving stranger.
1409 Soos March 15, 2013 at 5:34 am: You could pick me and increase your sales in Australia!!!! Please. Pretty please. I’m being horribly bullied at work and you cheer me up and mean I don’t feel alone in my psychological turmoil!
1410 Shannon March 15, 2013 at 5:43 am: Congratulations on your book reaching #5! I laughed the entire time I was reading it. I was first introduced to your blog by my best friend. She sent me a link to this blog: http://thebloggess.com/2011/06/and-thats-why-you-should-learn-to-pick-your-battles/ That. Was. Awesome.

Please come to Idaho.

Shannon
1411 Krystine McCants March 15, 2013 at 5:44 am: Congratulations! You deserve it! (P.S. Pick me please!)
1412 Dianna O. March 15, 2013 at 5:45 am: Yes Please!
1413 Abby March 15, 2013 at 5:50 am: I need that copy of your book!! And I will be selfish and keep it all to myself!
1414 Greyson Stoehr March 15, 2013 at 5:53 am: I would SOOOOOO love to win an autographed copy! I promise to read it aloud to all my friends (while taking frequent laughter breaks!)

Puhleeze???? *waves hands in air*

Grey
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1415 Jen March 15, 2013 at 5:58 am: I am hoping your tour goes so well that you tack on more locations. Like Michigan.
1416 Theresa March 15, 2013 at 6:01 am: Sorry I missed you when you came to NJ! I have the hard cover & the audio versions. So naturally I need this to complete my set!
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1417 Jessica C March 15, 2013 at 6:02 am: I love your book soo much. I hope you continue to have fun on your book tour!
1418 Renee D March 15, 2013 at 6:02 am: I’ll see you on Monday! Pick me and save the shipping.
1419 Catherine March 15, 2013 at 6:02 am: New fan. I don’t have a copy of the old book, so I definitely NEED the new one…for free…autographed. I also NEED new towels and a giant metal chicken. I actually saw one a few weeks and also most bought it just because. The next day I saw that a friend had one at her front door which she bought because of your blog. So here I am, a new fan because of our taste in chickens. It’s destiny!
1420 Kim March 15, 2013 at 6:06 am: Congrats – you deserve it! Here’s hoping it keeps climbing until it’s #1!
1421 Megan March 15, 2013 at 6:10 am: Congratulations on being #5 and good luck with the rest of your book tour! I really wish I could come to see you. I’m originally from Missouri, and you’ll be in Kansas City, which is only a couple of hours away from my home, but I’m currently working in Japan! I’m hopefully sending my brother as proxy since he’s a student up there.

I already have a hardback copy of your book, but I would love an autographed copy of the new version with its extra chapter!
1422 Amber K March 15, 2013 at 6:10 am: I love the idea of giving it to a new friend to see exactly what kind of person they are!
1423 Tanya March 15, 2013 at 6:14 am: My 10 year old son also loves your book and has read a few choice parts to his classmates – Uh Oh!
1424 Klementine March 15, 2013 at 6:16 am: Ohh, I wish I could come to one of your books tours! But I think Australia is a little far, and also I suspect I’d be just a touch alienated by the slight age differences between me and most of your readers (and you for that matter!). But come on, who ever heard of people having idols who were their own age?
Klementine recently posted..Dear Self: You’re 15, it’s OK that you’ve not got a true career yet. Also, sleep is awesome, you should get more of it.
1425 Angie March 15, 2013 at 6:16 am: Praying to the sweet little baby jesus with his little tiny halo that you pick me!
1426 Liesha March 15, 2013 at 6:24 am: Loved the audio version, but really want that bonus copy
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1427 Lucy March 15, 2013 at 6:25 am: I have the hard copy and would love a signed paperback!! I also have recommended your book to several people! Love your sense of humor!!
1428 Christine Moore March 15, 2013 at 6:26 am: Oh oh oh pick me!
1429 Devon</